(Disclaimer: This transcript is auto-generated and may contain mistakes.)

Last Sunday I preached a sermon called, Habitual Line Steppers. I really just scratched the surface on the subject and my purpose isn't to obviously beat people up and just get up here and say everything that I'm upset about. But sometimes there's things that need to be said and sometimes attention, we need to look at the Bible and see how it reflects upon our life and take a look and do some self-reflection on where we're at. And I think that this is one of those things, I think everybody struggles with boundaries. I think everybody struggles with crossing the line. Every day we sin, aren't you crossing the line with God? So, and you know, God brought the law forth because of transgressions. That means people are constantly stepping over the line of his law. So it is, it's a vast topic, but I do want to focus on a particular story and I kind of ended talking about this, but I kind of got off on like health and health foods and health advice and things like that. And before I get into the sermon, I just want to say this, that I'm not saying don't be healthy. I'm not saying don't give people advice. I'm just saying don't get crazy with it. Like, I really kind of feel like a lot of the things in Christianity, sometimes people take things way too far or they go way too far the other way, but we should be balanced and kind of in the middle on a lot of topics. So, you know, I don't think it's extreme to preach what I preached about that last week. I think I was trying to be like in the middle. There's some things that are good, there's some things that are bad, but I just, what I think is boundary pushing is when you're the health guru of the church and you have to tell everybody that will listen to you every health advice that you have, even unsolicited. So, again, I'm not against being healthy. I'm not against eating healthy, but I do think that sometimes it gets taken too far and it's not just at our church. I'm not saying, and I don't even know if it is happening at our church necessarily, but I think it happens in Christianity in general, that sometimes we get fixated on things that are really, you know, they're really just not as important as did you go to church on Sunday? You know, you're like, oh, you know, here's this and that about my health, but you never come to church because you're so unhealthy. It's like, I just, those types of things just baffle me, but I do want to preach about this subject of boundary pushers and line steppers. So this is basically, or habitual line steppers, part two. So, there's a lot of things that I wanted to say that I didn't get to say, and I want to try to get those things out to you today. So, and in Genesis chapter 31, we get a good example of Laban, who is, if you were paying attention to the story, a bad habitual line stepper. Like, he's just continuously doing things, even in this chapter, not only did he do things before, you know, the 20 years that he worked for Jacob, or that Jacob worked for him, excuse me, he's constantly changing his wages. He's constantly, you know, tricking him, saying, hey, you can marry my daughter, you just have to work seven years, and then he wakes up and Leah is the one that he actually married, and so then he's like, well, I'll serve you another seven years. And then at the end of that, he's like, hey, don't go, I know that God's blessing. And then, like, Laban even gets mad when Jacob starts being blessed beyond what he's being blessed. So, it's just he's constantly crossing lines of decency, crossing lines of family, because he is the dad of Rachel, the dad of Leah, and he probably gave those two bondservant women to his two daughters. And so, here's Jacob, he's having to run away from his father-in-law, because he's afraid that he's just gonna say, he's probably gonna kill him, or take away everything that he's worked hard for all these years, because Laban is such a line stepper, he's such a boundary pusher that he just doesn't trust him anymore. And earlier in the chapter, it says that his countenance towards him was not like it was before. He used to be really happy, but then when they made the deal over the cattle, and then Jacob just started building this big cattle empire or whatever, people were getting upset, Laban was getting upset, and he could just tell things were not gonna end well. And so, when people are pushing your boundaries, sometimes the best thing to do is to get out of the situation. But like the story tells us, even that sometimes doesn't work, he's like, I'm just gonna run away in the middle of the night so that I don't have to have this huge conflict with this person, because this person's always just constantly causing issues in my life. And he basically, so let's pick up the story in verse 22, but Laban ends up tracking him down. So you can't just leave Laban. He's not gonna let you just leave, he's gonna tell you what he thinks about it. He's gonna come and just, if God hadn't have spoken to him in that dream, he was probably gonna come and kill Jacob or try to kill him. But God spoke to him in a dream and said, don't say anything to him, good or bad. So he basically just says, don't say, don't cross lines with him that you shouldn't, don't even say anything good about him. Just don't say, and then like, does he say bad things in the rest of this chapter? All the way through it. Does he continuously cross lines of decency that he shouldn't be doing? All the way through this chapter he does. So look at verse 22, it says, and it was told Laban on the third day that Jacob was fled, and he took his brethren with him and pursued after him seven days journey and they overtook him in the Mount Gilead. And God came to Laban the Syrian in a dream by night and said unto him, take heed that thou speak not to Jacob either good or bad. Then Laban overtook Jacob. Now Jacob had pitched his tent in the mount and Laban with the brethren pitched in the Mount Gilead. And Laban said unto Jacob, what hast thou done that thou hast stolen away unawares to me? So you've left without telling me is what he's saying. And that's not usually how you end a job. I would always tell people, give people two weeks notice, that's the right thing to do, but that's kind of the norm in American society. And probably in most societies, you don't just leave and say I quit. But are there instances where that is probably acceptable? Yeah, because a lot of times, if you tell someone, especially nowadays, if you say, I'm giving you two weeks notice, they'll go, well you can just leave now. And it's just like, well I kind of needed that two weeks to pay my bills, so I'm trying to do the decent thing to you, why are you not doing the right thing with me? But see, what you do is what you're held responsible for, and God looks at that and he says, hey, he did the right thing. Regardless of what someone else does to you, you do the right thing. But Jacob in this situation, he knows what's gonna happen. He knows that he's gonna freak out, and so he leaves. And it says, and carried away my daughters as captives taken with the sword. Is that true? Did he capture them and just make them leave? No, he had a talk with them and said, this is what's going on, are you with me? And they're like, yep, our dad's wasted all of our goods, you know, let's get out of here. So they're ready to go, they're following their husband, their God-given authority, because once you give away your daughter in marriage, they are not under your authority anymore. So here's another line of decency that he crosses in this chapter where he's acting like he's the boss of that whole family just because Jacob worked for him. And so it says, and then, remember, God told him not to say any of this stuff, and here, the first thing out of his mouth is he's like, why have you done all this? And just like falsely accusing him of stuff. It says, wherefore didst thou flee away secretly and steal away from me and didst not tell me? And I might have sent thee away with mirth and with songs and tabaret and with harp. He's saying, hey, if you would have just told me, we would have had a big party. But Jacob knows that that's not true. So I think he's lying here. And it says, and hast not suffered me to kiss my sons and my daughters, thou hast now done foolishly in so doing. Is that good? Is that a good thing to say to him? Or is it a bad thing to say to him? Yeah, so even the lines that God has clearly laid out to him, he's breaking those instantly. And it says, it is in the power of my hand to do you hurt. But the God of your father spake unto me yesterday night saying, take thou heed that thou speak not to Jacob, good or bad. It's like, now he's explaining to him the dream, and it's like, Jacob's probably thinking like, yeah, are you really following what he said to do though? It says, and now thou, though thou wouldst needs be gone, because thou sore longest after thy father's house, yet wherefore hast thou stolen my God? So now he's accusing Jacob without evidence of stealing his gods, which are like his GI Joe collection or something, I don't know. It says they're images, you know, they're something that's small enough to hide. So anyway, he's obviously worshiping false gods of some sort, and it says, and Jacob answered and said to Laban, because I was afraid, for I said, Peradventure, or perhaps, thou wouldst take by force thy daughters from me. That's what his fear was, that he was gonna say, I quit, I'm taking what I have with me. He's gonna be like, no, you're not taking my daughters with you. And do you think that that's a reasonable thing for Jacob to think? I think it is. And the Bible says to leave and cleave. And here's a boundary that gets pushed a lot with new marriages and things like that, is that they don't understand the concept that once you leave father and mother, you cleave unto your spouse. You cleave unto your wife. You cleave unto your husband, and those people are no longer an authority in your life. Obviously, you should respect your parents. Obviously, if your parents have some good advice, and you wanna ask them for advice, or you wanna gain from their knowledge, that's good. But it's not my right to run Brandon and Nia's home because I'm her dad. That's just not right. And do I do that? I mean, I would hope that they would say that I don't do that, because I don't think that I do. But it's the same thing with Remy and Kylie. I don't run my kids' homes. They're their own family, and I'm not, obviously, if I feel like something's just really bad, I might say something, but that would be a really rare occasion that I would do that. But I wait for people to ask me stuff, you know? And if I'll do that with my own kids, that's what God wants us to do, though. Once I gave Nia away to Brandon, that was the end of my authority over her in my life. You understand? I mean, obviously, as the pastor, I'm the authority in the church for anybody that's doing the things of the church, but I don't go into your homes. I'm not gonna go into their homes and tell them what to do. But this is what Jacob is doing. He doesn't understand the concept that they might be his daughters, but they're no longer under his authority. They're under Jacob's authority, and he just has a real hard time letting it go. And I see this happen a lot in new marriages where even the wives or the sons will go to their parents for advice, or when they're fighting, they go to their parents and tell them everything that their spouse has done. That's wrong. That's not something that you should be doing. And even in pre-counseling, and I'm sure everybody's heard this kind of preaching before, that you leave and cleave, and parents should stay out of their children's business once they leave the home and get married. It just gets weird, right? I heard the other day about an independent Baptist preacher that when he gave away his daughter in marriage, he made the guy that married her sign this multi-page contract basically saying everything that he was gonna do, and basically giving himself authority in a lot of ways in their marriage. That's weird. That is overstepping the bounds. How many weddings do you think this person's performed, and they don't understand that concept? That's just weird. People just are constantly overstepping bounds and not following what the Bible says. So it says, Jacob says, With whomsoever thou findest like God's, let him not live before our brethren. Discern thou what is thine with me, and take it to thee, for Jacob knew not that Rachel had stolen them. So remember earlier in the story, Rachel did take them, but Jacob didn't know that. So, you know, he's, and here's the other thing that he's breaking. When you don't have proof that somebody did something, you should not accuse them of doing something that you don't know for sure that they did. That's called false accusations. Here's another transgression he's doing. It's like, did he know for sure that Jacob, why'd you steal my gods? And it's like, he doesn't know that. Now he can say, well, somebody did that. I'd like to know who did that or something, but he's just straightly accusing Jacob of stealing his gods, right? Now look at verse 33, it says, and Laban went into Jacob's tent, and into Leah's tent, and into the two maidservant's tents. So Jacob, he didn't say, you know, he said if you find that stuff in somebody, let them not live. So what does he proceed to do? To start walking into other people's tents, and just looking through all their stuff, looking for these things. I mean, to me, that's crossing a line. Who just walks into somebody else's house and just starts going through all their stuff to prove that they stole something from them? You're crossing a line. And you know, I don't even walk into my kids' house without knocking on the door. You never know what's going on. Most people lock their door, but you know, even out soloing and training, I teach people to knock on the hinge side of the door because who's ever knocked on a door where you knock on it and all of a sudden the door swings open? Anybody have that happen to them? And you know, usually it's not, it's just awkward. Hey, I'm from a Baptist church, I just happened to open your door and start talking to you, you know what I mean? So I mean, I don't think I'm off the cliff on this thing because I just think it's strange that he just starts rummaging through every, he goes to Jacob's tent, probably thinking for sure it's there because he's already accused him. Then he's like, let's go to Leah's. And then he goes into the two maid, you know, into the two maidservant's tents. So he's accusing all these people by what he's doing, but don't you think it's weird that he's just walking into other people's tents? I mean, it's not like he had a search warrant or something, but here's what a line stepper will do, they'll just cross lines of decency, cross lines of God's word, they'll cross just boundaries that they shouldn't be crossing into. And it's wrong, it says in verse 34, now Rachel had taken the images and put them in a camel's furniture and sat upon them and Laban searched all the tent but found them not. And she said to her father, let it not displease my lord that I cannot rise up before thee for the custom of women is upon me. And he searched but found not the images. So Rachel's like, here's a boundary that he won't push, I'm gonna say that it's my time of the month so that I don't have to get up. So we know that Jacob does have some limitations. I mean, Laban has some limitations of things he won't cross. He's not gonna cross the Red Sea, so to speak, in order to look for the images, okay? Without getting too graphic here, but I mean, it's gross, right? I mean, but she's lying, obviously. But anyway, so yeah, there's a line he won't cross. But he's already crossed a lot of lines up to this point, hasn't he? So, and then what happens next is that Jacob, long suffering as he is, willing to be defrauded, a hard worker, doing right by Laban this whole last 20 years, he said, you know what, I've had enough. And sometimes you do have to put people in their place when they're crossing boundaries with you that you don't want them to cross. And this was obviously Jacob's final straw here. And it says in verse 36, and Jacob was wrath. That means he was filled with wrath, he was ready to start doing some damage. What happens when God gets wrath? Or when God pours out his wrath, evil's gonna happen. So to me, Jacob here is ready to fight. He's probably ready to knock him out, is what I'm guessing. And it says, and chode with Laban, and Jacob answered and said to Laban, what is my trespass? What is my sin that thou hast so hotly pursued after me? The word chode is a form of the word chide. And to chide means to scold, to reprove, to utter words in anger or by way of disapprobation. To rebuke as to chide one for his fault. So he's not only mad, now he starts saying things in a very angry way and rebuking Laban. Now, I probably think this is probably maybe the only time this has ever happened. I mean, obviously he confronted him about the whole thing with Leah, you know, and lying to him, but he's just like, whatever, I love Rachel so much, I'm willing to serve another seven years for her. But, you know, Jacob has reached his limit, and he's ready to enforce his boundaries, because he's just watched them all get squashed. Every boundary of decency this guy has crossed with him, including searching his tents, his wife's tent, and all this other stuff, and he's upset. And it says in verse 37, whereas thou hast searched all my stuff, what hast thou found of all thy household stuff? Set it here before my brethren, and thy brethren, that they may judge betwixt us. This 20 years have I been with thee, thy ewes and thy she-goats have not cast their young, and the rams of thy flock have I not eaten. That which was torn a beast I brought not unto thee, I bear the loss of it. Of my hands didst thou require it, whether stolen by day or stolen by night. Thus I was in the day the drought consumed me, and the frost by night, and my sleep departed from my eyes. Thus have I been 20 years in thy house, I served thee 14 years for thy two daughters, and six years for thy cattle, and thou hast changed my wages 10 times. So he's just confronting him with all the ways that he's crossed the line with him, and he's just kinda throwing it all out there. And he's, there's nothing wrong with him defending himself at this point. And I think that he was very long suffering. I think that he had a Christian attitude about this for many, many years, and then, you know, sometimes people can just take things too far. And there are boundaries in our lives that we have to enforce. And they might not even be this big of a deal. They could be something even less of a deal, but if you don't have boundaries in your life, people are just gonna continuously just come at you and try to cross those lines. And sometimes you have to establish them right away so that people know that you're serious about it. You don't have to be mean about it. I told you last week about how Brother Robert doesn't like to be called any other thing but his name. And he established that boundary with me very quickly. The first time I tried to call him Bobby, he's like, my name's Robert. I was like, psh, yeah, I just, I didn't do it anymore. Have I ever called you anything else besides your name after that? No, because he established that boundary with me. I just think it's a good example of something, and I wasn't mad about it. To me, I think that when you smash someone's boundary or you cross over a line of decency with someone, or maybe it's just a line that you didn't know was there, and they tell you about it, you shouldn't get mad at them for it. That's just a weird way to respond. Like, well, I should just be able to smash your boundaries. I should just be able to cross the lines. No, people have their own sets of rules of just things that they like and things that they don't like. Like, I had Brother Steven come up here, and I was talking in his face. Nobody likes that. Most people, if I walked up and just was like this close to your face all the time, you wouldn't like it, would you? You'd back away. Like, Pastor Thompson is such a close talker. Like, what's wrong with him? You know, why does he have to just get right in my face? His breath stinks, you know, whatever. It's just a line of decency that people don't cross because they know it's just an invisible boundary. You know, here's another example. You don't walk around and hug other people's wives. But I know that in some churches, that's like, hey, everybody give your neighbor a hug and stuff like that, and I just think that's just, you're telling someone across a boundary that they might not be, number one, comfortable with, or it might not be decent. You know, if I walked into church and some dude had his arm around my wife all the time, there'd be a boundary broken right then. I'd be like, get up and get away from my wife right now. And then if it was broken again, you know, there might be some damage done to the person on the way out the door. But that's just, you know, that's just lines of decency that most people know and most people have. What verse was I at? Verse 42. So, verse 42 says, except the God of my father, the God of Abraham, and the fear of Isaac had been with me, surely thou had sent me away now empty. God has seen my affliction and labor of my hands and rebuked thee yesterday night. And Laban answered and said unto Jacob, these daughters are my daughters. So, even though he's saying, he broke all these rules, now he's about to cross some more lines. Look what he says. And Laban answered and said unto him, these daughters are my daughters. And that's true, they are. These children are my children. Is that true? No, they're his grandchildren. And he's not the boss of them either, but he thinks they are, or that he is. And these cattle are my cattle. But I thought the deal was, there was a cattle deal that went on here and Jacob took the cattle that he said he was gonna take and he just got done explaining, I gave, even the ones that got killed, I just took the loss of all that stuff. But here he is just crossing lines again, he just can't help himself. And it says, and all that thou seest is mine. Like he thinks he's the God of Jacob or something. Everything that you see, everything that you have right here is mine anyway. And so he's just kinda like put himself in a weird position where he's just saying, he's just kinda like acting like, well if I let you go now, it's just because I'm merciful or something, right? And he says, and what can I do this day unto these my daughters or their children that they have born? So I just think that a great lesson out of this is that as Christians, yes, we should turn the other cheek. We should be easy to be entreated upon, we should be meek, we should be willing to be defrauded, we should be willing to go the extra mile. These are all characteristics that Jacob had. We should forgive easily. I believe all that. But there also are boundaries that we should have in place in our lives that we won't allow people to cross. Here's an example, I just thought of this example. Jesus allowed John to lean on his breast at the Last Supper. In our culture, that would not be acceptable, would it? But Jesus Christ is God manifest in the flesh. There's obviously nothing wrong with that. And it was obviously a boundary that Jesus was okay with. But culturally, in our culture today, like if you walked in and Sean Conlon was leaning upon Alex's chest like this, you guys would be like, what's wrong with these guys? Is there a little sugar in the tank? What's going on here? It's just a cultural thing that is not normal to us. But Jesus was okay with it. But do you think that Jesus would have been comfortable with some transvestite holding his hand all day while he walked through the cities? Or do you think that Jesus would have been like, get off, get your filthy hands off me, you freak. I mean, there's boundaries that obviously God has put in place. He made all the laws. He made everything that we're supposed to go by. So there are bounds of decency that Jesus would, Jesus wouldn't have probably allowed, you know, he allowed women to kiss his feet. And you know, but we're talking about the Lord here. This is not just some random dude. So if you walked in and some random dude is getting his feet kissed by your wife, you're gonna be like, hey, you're crossing the line here, both of you. You're weird and so are you. Like, you need to get your act together. Do you understand what I'm saying? Like, there's, even the Lord is gonna have bounds of decency where he's just gonna be like, no, you're not doing that. And he does have those things. So it's not wrong for us to, you know, obviously I read, I told you all those things that we should be, but there also is lines that we shouldn't cross and we should put up boundaries and we should enforce boundaries in our life. So there is also, you know, another side of the habitual line stepper, the one who continuously allows their borders to be crossed without establishing them. And I already said that it's a danger to do this because then once you, say you don't have a boundary with somebody and then after a while you're like, you know, I really just don't feel comfortable with that so I'm gonna stop allowing this to happen. And you say something to them, that person generally will get, well, you never felt like that before, why do you feel that way now? So that's why I say it's important to enforce the boundaries first, but do you have the right to change your mind also? Of course you do. Do you have the right to get right on something and then be like, yeah, you know, I used to feel this way but now I don't. So I've changed my, it's like, it's so weird, like even people will say, well, the new IP used to say this or Pastor so-and-so used to say that and now they're saying this. It's like, are they not allowed to grow? Are we not allowed to change our mind about anything? You know, sometimes you learn new things and you're like, okay, well, I probably was wrong about that before and now that I've really dug into it and studied it, now I believe this. Obviously, pastors are not supposed to be, you know, just changing their doctrine on everything all the time, but do you think that we have the right to change our mind on what we believe? You know, obviously, if it's from the Bible, if Pope so-and-so tells me this is what you're supposed to believe now, you don't have to believe it. But if the Bible teaches you in your personal study and you change on that, there's nothing wrong with that. Everybody does that. Everybody changes things that they believe. There's lots of things that I believed when I first got saved, that some of them were preconceived notions and then some of them, I just, you know, after reading the Bible and studying them, I change on those things. You know, like, or learn new things. We should always be learning new things, but obviously not necessarily changing, you know, if I just said, you know what, I think it is repent of your sins, I've been wrong about this the whole time. It's like, you should just grab me at that point stow me with stones and throw me out the door. I mean, that's just wicked. So if I change my mind on something that's like really, like a heresy that's damnable, you should get rid of me. Anyway, so if you allow your rules to be broken and you don't ever stick up for yourself, you don't have healthy boundaries in your life, you don't have healthy boundaries in place, and that is gonna cause you a lot of problems in life. And some people are just kinda pushovers, that's just your nature, there's nothing wrong with that. But I kinda feel like I was this way early in my life. I really don't like being in arguments and having to confront people and stuff like that. It's just not in my nature, I want people to get along. And so when people aren't getting along or people are having problems, I don't like that. But as a pastor, it's my job to correct things as they come up. But it's also your job as a Christian to enforce things and to put things in place for your life too. So here's some things that I think that we should visit in our minds, and then some of these things, they might be things that you're failing on, some of these things, you're like, yeah, I've been meaning to do this or whatever, but I'm just gonna kinda rattle some stuff off here. So telling people all your past sins and faults. I think it's a bad idea. I don't think that you should do that. And look how many traitors we've had in our past. You're telling people your most intimate things of your life, sometimes people can't help but have an opinion or a judgment against something once they hear it. It's like those people are like, I'm gonna tell you something, you promise not to be mad about it? It's like, well, that's not really a promise I can make, you know? I committed adultery with your wife, you said you weren't gonna get mad! What are you talking about? You can't make promises like that. So I would just say that telling people things that would be very embarrassing if they revealed it in public are bad ideas, and especially when you first meet someone, a new person joins our church or whatever, and you're just telling them every secret that you have, everything you've ever thought, everything you've ever done, and just telling your whole mind, how'd that work out for Hezekiah and the children of Israel, when he's just showing them everything. Oh, hey, look, here's all my gold shields, here's all my gold, look at this, look at all my Jew gold or whatever. He's showing them all the treasures of Israel, and then Isaiah's like, what did you show them? What did you tell them? And he just basically said, you're a fool to do that. And Hezekiah was a good man? Of course he was, he was a great man of God, he was a great king, but he was guilty of showing people too much. And there is a thing about family where, you know, there's certain things that, you know, you can let your hair down around your family, your immediate family. You can be, and I'm not saying be bad or whatever, I'm just saying, there just might be on a car ride, you know, some sounds creak out from dad or kids or whatever, it's just not how you would act around a bunch of other people, you know what I'm saying? So, we should just be careful about going and telling people things about ourself that you don't want. Just think of it this way. Do I want this out on the internet later on? Because if you don't, then you shouldn't tell people those things. Because there's lots of things that are just running loose on the internet that I'm sure people in here and yours truly would wish that you had never said anybody or told people. So, telling people personal details of your life that should be kept private is something, a boundary that you shouldn't cross, okay? And, you know, people of the opposite sex spending time alone with your spouse. Don't you think that that would be a boundary you shouldn't push? You know, people act like, oh, what, I'm not allowed to have guy friends or whatever. No, you're not. You get married, that's your friend. That's your guy friend for life. It's like, I'm not saying don't be nice to people, but like, if you're married and then you're talking to some other dude by yourself in the secret or whatever, it's wrong. Or you're just going on a lunch date with my guy friend or whatever and you're married. You know, a lot of people, what, you're just trying to control them. No, it's just not something you should do. Because sometimes people can catch feelings. You know, and if you don't put yourself in a position to be tempted, you know, you don't give provender to something that could happen, then, you know, you're better off. Why would you put somebody in a position where they're gonna be tempted? Possibly. So, people watching your kids. Some people have various degrees of rules about these types of things. And I always say that you shouldn't let your kids spend the night at other people's houses or let other people watch your kids that are not family that you absolutely trust. So, that's something I preach. That's something I believe. But people still do what they want on these things. But then, if something happens to that kid because you just chose to ignore that boundary, then whose fault is that? Can you live with that? That's really the question you should answer yourself, because sometimes you just think, well, you know, what's the big deal? They're nice, they're from church, whatever. And you're like, you know, they're never gonna do anything and it's just like, then something happens and you're like, I can't believe that this happened. It's like, if you don't have the boundary, then the boundary's gonna get crossed and things, bad things can happen when that happens. So, and let me just give this example. Some people don't like other people picking up their kids. Okay? I don't have a problem with you making rules for that. I don't think anybody would have a problem making rules for that. But you have to put the boundary in place. You have to tell that person that you don't want them doing that and then be done with it. It doesn't have to be a mean thing. It doesn't have to be uncomfortable. You don't have to walk up and go, don't let your, don't pick up my kid. Because that's what people, you know, but even if someone did do that, just kind of like, okay, sorry, walk away or whatever. But obviously I don't think we need to respond to things like that. Jasmine, my daughter down in Texas, she picked up a church member's kid one time. I'm not gonna say who it was. But they had like a real nasty looking face and I think snot and whatever. And she just like took something and wiped that person, that kid's face. And then got rebuked real hard and meanly for it. But again, maybe she was crossing, I mean she obviously wasn't trying to do anything wrong but it was a boundary to that person and she crossed it. So, you know, obviously some people respond in different ways. But the kids nicknamed her after that swipe and wipe. If she swiped somebody's kid and wiped their face. Sorry Jasmine if you listen to that. But it's just an example. Like, you know, and look, it's not my job to enforce your kid's borders. It's not your, you know, and here's the other thing. It's like if you don't want your kid playing with another kid. It's your responsibility as the parent to keep your kid away from those people. It's not the other parent. It's not the other kid. Because kids just do what kids do. Kids play with each other and they don't see anything wrong or, you know, there's no issues with them. But sometimes parents have issues. There's nothing wrong with that. But what's wrong is to try to enforce, have someone else enforce a border that you have. So, you know, these are just things and obviously, you know, some of these things might hit home or whatever. I'm not trying to pick on people. I'm just saying that you have to think about things the right way, too. When you're enforcing your borders, when you're enforcing your rules, when you're, you know, setting lines in place for your family, then you shouldn't expect the other person, obviously, if you, you know, and I'm talking about kids here. Kids, like I said, they have to be told what to do by their parents. And, you know, so we gotta be careful when we cross over in other people's realms. And again, if you don't want your kid playing with somebody, you don't want somebody picking up your kid, you need to tell that person and there's nothing wrong with that. And if someone does tell you, hey, please stop picking up my kid, don't get all salty about it and mad. Just be like, okay, well, no problem. That's not your kid, so just accept it, right? So, it's kind of like America's borders. We're just, at this point, kind of Sleepy Joe's just kind of letting anybody in, any place, any time, any border, and I'm not trying to make this about racism or anything like that. I'm just saying, in general, the rule is there's a way to immigrate into this country. So when you're allowing people to cross the lines without following the rules, you are literally not controlling your borders. You try to get into Canada and see how well that works. They got the Mounties there ready to turn you away for anything. And, I mean, it's a fact. So, but I'm just saying that you can't, we have to just look at, here's something else that happened, Ron DeSantis, okay, he's the governor in Florida, and I'm not advocating for him or whatever, but to prove a point, because a lot of illegals were coming in and being let into people's property, and things like that on the border, and causing problems, when people were doing it to him, letting him come into Florida, they're letting him come into all these different places, but it's never where the rich people live. It's never where the people actually have the money to take care of them and feed them and shelter them. It's always, it's just like, they're acting like they love people by letting them in, but then they're just not giving them the things they need, or they're just, they're pushing other people's boundaries by letting them be in certain areas. So he just buys tickets for a bunch of people and sends them to Martha's Vineyard, which is a really expensive place to live. It's where a lot of ultra-rich people live, right? And the people there are like, at first, are all, oh yeah, we wanna help them, blah, blah, blah, and they're giving them the worst junk food you ever had. So even these rich people, it's not like they're buying organic food for them and just treating them really well, making sure they're all taken care of. They're like, here's some Rice Krispie treats in a thing of Oreos or something. And ultimately, he was doing it to prove a point, because eventually they said, we can't handle this anymore. We're not equipped to do this. What do you mean? You have millions of dollars. You can't build a warming shelter in Martha's Vineyard or something? They're liars. And so, a lot of people want to impress upon other people's borders with, oh, hey, well, they're there. I just love them. Oh yeah, you love them so much, you won't even let them stay in Martha's Vineyard, because it's just, it's the same thing in Portland. You don't see the tent cities up in the West Hills, do you? You don't see the tent cities in the rich areas you see in downtown Portland, where they're bashing out people's windows every single day, allowing them to cross all kinds of lines of decency. They're giving them drugs, they're giving them needles, and if someone wants to pick up their garbage and throw it in the trash that they're just leaving everywhere, then now you're breaking their rules and their boundaries by throwing their trash in the trash can. Now they have to pay someone to take those belongings, mark whose name it is, and leave it in like a trailer downtown under the bridge, because you're not allowed to throw away their stuff that they just left laying on the sidewalk. So we live in a country where borders are just crossed daily, and then they'll have these tent cities in people's neighborhoods, and you know what happens? Crime goes up, theft goes up, people walking into other people's houses and sleeping in their beds. It's like, it's not Goldilocks, it's the three tweakers. It's weird, but if you don't have boundaries, if you don't have rules, then society is gonna go downhill. It's like Bernie Sanders. You know, I'm once again asking for your support or whatever. Yeah, you're asking for people for their support so that you can take money out of working people's hands out of their bank accounts and give it to people that don't wanna work. That don't wanna further their education. That don't wanna even work at McDonald's. They wanna push, they're boundary pushers too, these communists. We're gonna take from you so we can give it to someone that we think deserves it. Where's the transportation department in the whole deal, the train crash in Ohio? They're like, well, Pete Buttigieg, he's just not even showing up. He's on maternity leave for kids that he didn't even bear. Kids that he adopted with his queer frickin' husband or whatever he is. And it's like, there's people that are poisoned right now. You can see it in the water. They don't care about those people. You know why they don't care? Because they're white. Because that's the new, well, you know, we'd care if they weren't white. Do you think if that happened in a black neighborhood right now that they wouldn't be apologizing up and down for what they've done? And he can't even get off maternity leave or whatever, he's on personal time. How much personal time do you need, Buttigieg? They put all these people in power and they do nothing. You know why Portland was shut down? Because they got a bunch of weirdos over there running their transportation department that have never even picked up a shovel in their whole life. They probably don't even know they never swing a round point shovel and a square head shovel. And they're gonna tell a bunch of long haired, not long haired, hair-legged men that are out in the workforce, how they're supposed to do their job when you've never even looked at a, you won't even go to the construction sites. What in the world? I don't know how I got all mad about that, but it's just annoying. There's cars parked on the side of the road all over Portland because the people that actually know what they're doing have been told to shut up and stand down and then they bring in all these lesbians to come in and tell them how to run the department. Because the queer dudes won't even work there because it's just, oh, I might break a nail. And then you got the lesbians that want to be men, they want to come in and, oh yeah, I'll tell you how it's done. Have you ever done this before? No, but I got a bachelor's degree and blah, blah, blah. Because people want to blame the city workers. People want to blame the ODOT workers for everything that's happening over there. Why don't you put some salt on the road? You hippie. Oh, it might hurt the salmon. Last thing I checked, salmon live in the ocean where there's salt. So you think if they put salt on the road once or twice a year, it's just gonna kill all the salmon that actually live in salt water anyway before they spawn? It's gonna hurt the plants, it's gonna hurt the trees. New York's still green, isn't it? But yet they've been using salt for years and years and years because, believe it or not, in places where it actually really snows, this is just nothing compared to what people in Chicago and Ohio and Minnesota and New York and all these places have to deal with. You know what they use? Salt. You know why they use it? Because it works. You know why they use it? So stuff like this doesn't happen where you got children in school buses sitting in traffic for six hours, their bus driver leaves them and leaves them in the hand of a stranger. Well, I didn't sign up for this. See ya, kids. Here's, Bologna Joe's gonna come take care of you for a while. I mean, I don't know the whole situation, but that's just what I read on the internet, okay? But there's, look, I've gone through it multiple times because I used to do snow and ice. People, part of it is the people are retarded sometimes. They go out and they're like, I'm gonna go in my Toyota Prius with bald tires. I've been meaning to get to Les Schwab's. Oh, it's snowing. I'm gonna drive all the way to work from Vancouver in my bald tires and maybe I'll make it home tonight. It's like, when I got up that morning, it was already snowing. You're like, oh, I think it's a good idea. Here's what happens every time. Carmageddon. If it happens during a weekday, it's Carmageddon. Good luck getting home. What time did you get home, Brother Sean? I got home at 12 but one of my guys didn't get home until 6 a.m. Oh, man. You know why? Maybe they should've salted the roots. Maybe they should've started plowing immediately. But it's like, you know, they'll cancel our Christmas vacations and then it doesn't snow the whole time. But at least they were ready. Now the regime, you got in there, it's like, oh, well, if it's on the weekend, I understand. Like, where do you really need to go unless you're working on the weekend? Unless you're EMS, fire, or police, why do you need to be at work or a hospital worker? You know, why are people going to go in and like data entry at some building in downtown Portland? They worked from home for like two or three years. You can't do it again? Anyway, people just, I have to get my Starbucks. I didn't have to get out. And then they're like stuck on the side of the road freezing to death. Stupid. I don't know how this, see, I shouldn't go off my nose because it just leads down a dark trail. Last week I talked about how, you know, I brought up a couple of examples about things that annoyed people, like Robert and Miss Annie. And she didn't even say she was annoyed. I don't wanna, I was not trying to embarrass people. I just, she just put up a clear boundary with me and she was nice about it. And I took it. And me, my granddaughter, she is the type of person that if she wants to touch you, she'll touch you, but you don't touch her. So, like, she probably isn't even that way with her dad. Yeah, she just, she enforces her boundaries. At three years old, she's already a boundary enforcer. Like if I try to like hug her or something, like she's at my house, and she's spent a lot of time with me. I know she loves me, but like not too long ago she was at my house and I was like, oh, leave me like that. She was like, don't touch me. I was like, you know, it hurt my feelings, but she didn't wanna be touched. I was like loud and clear, isn't that true, Emmy? But, you know, she'll sit there and she'll rub my arm like this, or she'll hug me, or she'll kiss me, but she has to be the person that initiates the, you can't just walk up and hug her. She'll be like, don't touch me, get off, you know. So, and I get, not everybody's like that, but I'm just using that as an example that she's a person that will put those boundaries in place and it's good to do it early. It's good to be a type of person that would do it early. So if you don't like something that someone is doing to you, you need to tell them. Put up the boundary and be firm and be serious while enforcing it. Normally that is enough to stop people from doing it. But of course, Laban, you know, you got the Labans out there in the world. But here's another thing. Someone asks you a question, probing you about a subject you know they don't wanna talk about, and you need to put that person in their place. Because if you've already said, I don't wanna talk about this, or it's already been said, hey, I don't wanna talk, these people don't wanna be asked about this, they don't wanna talk about this, then you should just respect that boundary and not try to find an end around to get the information that you want. I talked about this like two months ago, but apparently some people didn't get the memo. So, but you know what you're doing is you're trying to cross a line and a boundary knowing that they didn't wanna talk about it. I just say this, shame on you. You just shouldn't be doing that stuff. Stop doing this crap. It's annoying and it's rude and it's a character flaw. It's a character flaw. If you already know that it's not right to do it and you're still doing it anyway, that's something that's wrong with you and you need to fix that problem. Because there, and again in that sermon, I'll just point you back to that sermon two months ago that I preached about this type of situation that you don't always have to tell everybody. Just because we're Christians and we're supposed to be honest and we're not supposed to lie doesn't mean that you have to tell everybody everything about yourself or everything about something that you know that's not that person's business. So, here's some other things. How about just being a space invader? I already talked about close talkers. What about space invaders? They're dating but they're not married but they're doing this. They're sitting too close. And obviously I don't have some hardened rule about that but in my house there was a bible in between at least. Like a good decent sized chunk in between the two of them. And they were supposed to leave space for Jesus. Instead of, if that's not your spouse yet, then keep your hands to yourself. Don't kiss them, don't try to hold their hand, don't try to hug them. It's just, and people just, when people are adults they do whatever they want but does that mean that they should do whatever they want? Just because you've moved out of your parent's house, is that what you should do? Should you be coming to church with someone that you're dating, nobody knows what's going on and you're sitting really close to this person. It doesn't look good. You're crossing borders of decency that you shouldn't be doing. The bible says, would draw thy foot from thy neighbor's house lest he be weary of thee and so hate thee. Here's another boundary. Staying too long at people's houses. I have pillows that I bought a couple years ago that said, welcome to our home, please leave by 9 p.m. Now obviously, my kids, whatever, they can stay. We just start turning the lights off and go to bed and they kind of get the hit. But generally, you don't stay at people's houses too late. You don't invite yourself over to people's houses. I've seen this kind of stuff over the years where people will stay too long at someone's house. It's like, hey, you can stay for the weekend or you can stay for a couple weeks and it's like six or eight weeks later. They're still there. It's just like, what are you doing? That's why this verse is here. Would draw thy foot from thy neighbor's house lest they be weary of thee and so hate thee. Because eventually, too much time around somebody can cause problems and then people start lapping over into areas that don't belong to them. Start telling you how to raise your kids. Start telling you what you're doing right, what you're doing wrong. And people just, you know, you don't go and be a guest at someone's house and then try to run their home. That's just weird. It's abnormal. It's not normal. And let's see, Proverbs 25 verse 23, here's a principle in the Bible about when someone is talking behind your back. When someone is talking behind your back, okay? So the concept is there in the Bible that when someone is talking behind your back or behind someone else's back, then here's how you respond to them. It says the north wind driveth away rain, so doth an angry countenance a back-biting tongue. So what is an angry countenance? Or just like, and then they know like, hey, you've crossed the line. You don't even have to say anything. If you can look at someone and they visibly are angry with something that you said to them, then most people will just back off at that point. But that's what the Bible says to do. It also says in Proverbs 15 one, it says a soft answer turneth away wrath, but grievous words stir up anger. So obviously we should be polite. That's a normal line of decency that we have in our lives and the word of God says, you know, if maybe someone is getting too agro with you or whatever, then if you respond to them always with a grievous answer, then it's gonna make anger last longer. It's gonna make a fight happen. So obviously we should be polite, but there is times when we should give the angry countenance a look, you know? And I'm gonna go a little bit longer, but not too much longer. But anyway, might be a part three coming up. But church rules. So here's some things that agro me, all right? When I have to get up and say the same church rules all the time, and we've been a church for six years and I have to keep saying it because people keep breaking those rules all the time. Now I understand if you're new, but if you've been here for a long time and then there's like clear rules that are, you know, and again, because of transgression the law came. Because of transgressions here, laws come also. They're like, well you don't have the right to do that. Yeah I do, I'm the pastor of the church, I do have the right to do that. And I will, you're like, well I just get tired of you having to say the same things all the time. Me too. I get tired of having to say the same things all the time too. To the point where like I feel like if I bring it up at every service, then it's just gonna just go over the head, but then it just goes over the head anyway. So, I just, I hate having to repeat myself. The older I get, the meaner I get. And when someone, you know when someone like asks you a question and they've asked you multiple times and they just didn't listen to the answer and they ask you again? That. You wanna see how mad I get over that? I get mad. But I try to be patient, okay? So, but, I'm just talking about like basic rules. So, you're like, well why are you so annoyed that you have to go over the rules? Because you go over the same sermons. Yeah, because we need to be reminded. So, I'm not mad that I have to remind people or I have to set rules in order or whatever, but what I get annoyed about is when I know that there's people that just refuse to listen to those rules and they just, instead of just saying, okay, well I'll quit doing that, they just continue to do it. It's like, I know you heard me. I know it for sure that you heard. So, not too long ago I mentioned, and I'm just gonna use this as an example, and look, I don't know who did it and I don't care. I don't have a camera up there to prove anything. I just know this happened. So, and this isn't a big deal, really, but it kind of is to me. So, not too long ago I mentioned that the kitchen gets cleaned between church services. So, most of the time, you know, people bring their food and that's cool. Bring your food, eat. I want you to. But I just said if people go up there and you can tell that after soul winning it's pristine clean, then don't pull out all your food again and make a giant mess in the kitchen and then leave it again. Wipe off your kid's high chair. Clean, I mean, I'm not saying you have to get down, you know, after church and scrub every inch of the kitchen. You know, someone is being kind and doing that for you. People have the kindness of their heart come here because they want to serve the Lord and come and clean. I feel like I've had to harp on this over the years and just having to say it again already annoys me. But when this happened, I just really calmly, plainly said it and because it's already happened so many times where people do that, I felt like I just had to say something because it's really frustrating for someone when they do something, they put a lot of work into it and then it just like gets destroyed immediately right afterwards. So, I said please, just if you're gonna go up there afterwards, just clean, you know, grab your stuff. Don't make a mess, whatever. So, what did I find up there in the sink? That same day, that same night, a dirty serving spoon and look, if it had been rinsed off, it wouldn't have been that big of a deal but someone just threw it in the sink and walked downstairs or whatever with the rest of their stuff. As if that spoon is somebody else's job to wash off after I just got done saying it and you're like, well that's me, don't tell me who it is. Don't admit it to me after church because I'm still not over it yet, right. I forgive you though. It's not that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things but the point is is that I specifically mention those things and then that happens. And then I just start to wonder, am I getting trolled here? Seriously. People also like to grab utensils and use them instead of washing them. How hard is it to just rinse something off real quick? And then they take the utensil and they stick it on top of the refrigerator dirty for someone else to find. Like who does that? If it's you, stop, please. But you know, and if you're not the one that's queening stuff up and you know that someone else is, how disrespectful is that to do that to someone that's working really hard. This building's a lot bigger than the one that we had before. It's a lot more work to clean. Just vacuuming is gonna break your back. I tried with the robot, the robot gave up. The robot said, no mas, no mas. It's back there dead. Someone knows how to fix it, please do it. I've tried and it just, I don't know. But again, is it such a big deal? The big deal is that the rule was set forth and that someone just literally just like to spit in my face did that. Or they weren't here for the morning service to hear me say it and they just didn't know. But even if you don't know, like even at home, my wife does the dishes the lion's share of the time. But you know what, if she's already cleaned everything up, I'll go and rinse my stuff off or wash my own stuff. I don't mind doing that because it's just, if she's already cooked my dinner, brought it to me on a silver platter, she doesn't do that but I might start enforcing that rule. No, I'm just joking. I'm just saying that like, help people out when they're doing stuff like that. Is it crossing the line? I think it is crossing the line. If something's already clean, you know it was clean, clean up your mess, clean up after your kids. It's not that hard. But some people just continue to habitually line step with behavior until someone checks them. Which in a church setting is not something that we want to do or want to have to do or should have to do. But I would just say this, don't make it weird. The rules in place, some people just have to answer back about every single thing. What does the Bible say, that you're not supposed to answer back? When your boss tells you to do something, you don't always have to tell them how you don't agree and how you can do it better this way. That's annoying, just shut up, don't be weird. And don't make me be Officer Thompson. You know, I didn't sign up to be a police officer here, but I feel like sometimes I'm forced in that position, I gotta be Detective Thompson, well who did this, who's doing that? And you know, it can get annoying. But I realize that I have a lot of responsibility, I'm not trying to say that I don't like my job or something, but you know what I don't like? I don't like having to be Officer Thompson. I personally hate being a policeman, and especially at church. So just follow the rules, they're not that hard. Don't cross the line, don't be a line stepper. Well I'll show him, I'm gonna dip this into my spaghetti, twist it around and then throw it in the sink. I'm gonna leave like whole blocks of cheese melted in the sink or whatever, it's just like what? I'm gonna use the microwave and not put a napkin over the top of my plate so that it splatters all over the microwave. Do you know who cleans that microwave? Not you, you don't even care. The microwave we have is a gift from one of our church members. But it's always, it's splatter house every week. It's just like, is it really that hard to take the napkins that are provided by the church, by the way? Rip off a couple squares, put it over the top of your plate. Like well I just don't like napkins touching my food. Well then don't cook it in the microwave. Cause you know what happens when you cook stuff in the microwave and warm it up? It splatters and shoots. You hear it go pssss, pssss when you're cooking stuff in the microwave. And some of you are like, well microwave causes cancer. Let's table that for a later time. But do you know what I'm saying? Like just, you know, if you love your neighbor, you're not gonna do ill to your neighbor. You know we're supposed to love the Lord our God with all of our hearts, with all of our minds, with all of our soul, with all of our strength. And to love our neighbors as ourselves. But when you're constantly going over the line with sin, when you're constantly going over the line of decency, when you're constantly just trying to break people's borders and be a border jumper, literally and spiritually, and in every way that you can think of, you know that's just, it's not being good to your neighbor. It's not respecting God. Like Laban, don't speak good or bad to him. You've done foolishly Jacob. It's like, I'm surprised God didn't just kill him on the spot. It's just like he just had no reverence for what God said. He had no reverence for his son-in-law that made him rich. He had no reverence for his daughters that he gave to Jacob. Obviously knowing he's a good man, he's gonna treat them right and so on and so forth. And then at the end of the chapter he's like, you know, because I didn't read that far past it, but at the end of the chapter he's like, let's make a covenant. It's almost like Jacob makes this covenant with him. It's like, make this covenant, you're not gonna marry anybody else besides my daughters. You're not gonna do this and do that. So he's still, even in the covenant, asking him to do things that are basically not his realm of authority. So we need to be people that are not like Laban, but are like Jacob. And Jacob was all those things I mentioned earlier. He's a great man, but he also had a point of no return that Laban pushed him to, to where he had to say something back to him. So I would just say this, when it comes to line stepping, border crossing, landmark moving, that we need to just take inventory on. Where are we at? What are we doing? Is there things that we're doing ourselves that we could get better on? And if that's true, then implement those things into your life, don't be mad, and if you're one of the people, look, I honestly, I don't know who did that. And if you're mad at me for bringing it up, you're victim blaming. You're victim blaming. You are. It's like, well, he shouldn't be mad about that. It's his job. Is it really my job to wash your utensil? I didn't make you eat up there. It's provided out of the kindness of the church's heart, basically. So don't abuse things, don't go too far. All right, let's pray. Lord, we thank you so much for this church, and Lord, I pray that people will get the spirit of what I'm saying, but also apply the physical things that I was talking about and I just pray that you would, Lord, help us to be a people that's guided by your word, and Lord, that we, when we are reproved or rebuked for things, that Lord, we should just internalize those things and get those things right. And obviously, not everybody's right that corrects us. Maybe they're not right in the situation, but Lord, help us to just search out, is it possible that I am the one that's wrong? And Lord, I pray that we'd all be like that because it'll make us better Christians. I pray you'd help us to love you above all things, and Lord, that we'd love our neighbors, including every single person in this church, as ourselves. In Jesus' name we pray, amen.