(Disclaimer: This transcript is auto-generated and may contain mistakes.)

So we're continuing our series on the family and I'm obviously well we've just touched on the family we haven't really gone into any detail just yet. Last week I spoke about you know being a man you know just basically why God has put man on this earth, what he has given us instinctively to do and just what the purpose of a man is okay and it's simple you know again I've said this before you know it's inbuilt in our DNA we know as men we know what we need to do we know we're made to work hard when we know we're made to find a wife and we know we're made to lead our home you know inside a man every man wants to be a leader every man wants to be in charge of a family of a unit you know and take responsibility for those things and likewise this isn't just the man but God has done the same thing for women okay now look at first Timothy chapter 5 verse 14 first Timothy chapter 5 verse 14 and look at this look look how compatible this is we've been a man but now we're looking at the woman okay verse 14 I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully so the title of sermon tonight as we can see there in verse 14 is the younger women okay that's the title of sermon tonight the younger women and now meaning when I say the younger women you know we've got women here who are maybe in the 20s or 30s or 40s or 50s like ah that's not for that's for that's not for me you know that's for that's for girls that are teenage girls or you know in the 20s early 20s that's that's the younger women but no look at verse number nine look at verse number nine it says and the context by the way of all this is being a widow but look at it to see let not a widow be taken into the number of three school years old having been the wife of one man so what's three score years old you guys remember what a score is it's 20 so three score is three times 20 this is talking about a widow here the context is a widow who is 60 years old and in comparison to that it basically is saying that someone that is under 60 is the younger woman okay and so if you're under 60 years old ladies the Bible calls you a younger woman you're young woman still okay so even though the title is the younger women that includes you if you're under 60 okay and obviously if you're over 60 if you're a widow there's a different requirement for that I don't want to spend too much time on going through widows but it does help us to build the context there but again you know again what is God with looked last week what is God's will for a man what are the instinctive goals of a man you know what gives satisfaction what gives great contentment to a man again just again think about what they were and think about what we saw there with women you know was to work a job right why do we want to work a job is so can provide for our families so we can provide for a wife but then look at look at what the first thing there was for women it says that the younger women marry you see how these things are compatible so the man has to go go get a job you know and the woman hey it's it the first thing that's on your agenda is to get married right so hopefully that man that's working hard and then obviously the man is to find a wife and what's the next condition there for a woman woman marry bear children how does she bear children if she doesn't have a husband right these things are in logical order okay and again I'm saying the same thing this is God's will for you women you know for late ladies and it's what's going to give you the greatest contentment it's what's going to give you the greatest satisfaction as soon as you read this you know the feminists in the world are going to be like are you crazy you know get married and have children that's the last thing a woman wants but no God says no this is what women want this is instinctively inside a woman this is what I want marry their children if you remember what the last thing was for a man was to lead their home well look at what it is for a woman guide the house okay both of them are responsible for their household both of them are responsible for their family but of course we know as we saw last week is that the man is the head of the wife and God holds the man accountable holds a husband accountable for the household but yet it's not like okay well that's the man's accountable so the wife goes words you know that's his business oh it's the woman's job here to guide the house so we're going to be looking at these three points okay the three points that we see here in verse 14 but going back to the context of a widow we looked at the widow there in verse number nine talking about a widow that's over 60 years old look that's number 10 it says well-reported of for good works if she had brought up children if she had lodged strangers if she had washed the Saints feet if she had relieved the afflicted if she had diligently followed every good work this is talking about a church looking after the widows that are in the church okay and Paul gives us here some instructions as to how we're meant to do that he says look a widow that's over 60 years old and a widow that has a great testimony okay she's raised her children obviously she no longer has little children at that age her children have grown up the children are looking after herself you know she's been faithful to the church she's been faithful toward the brethren you know serving the brethren that's the widow that the church is to look after you know and I've often heard people say you know the churches these days they've lost their ways the Bible says we're to look after widows you know and it's like some churches it's their goal to find widows and look after them hey but it's not just any widow you know it's not an unbelieving widow okay it's a it's a believing widowed someone that's saved and that has a good reputation has a good testimony and has has done well to the church that's the widow if she's got no family to look after her that's the one the church is meant to look after okay now why are you talking about widows right now because then we get to verse number 11 okay and then it says but the younger widows refuse so what is the younger widows in the context of what we saw there in verse number 9 the widows that are under 60 years old refuse them okay what does that mean as a church we're not meant to look after all the needs of widows that are under 60 years old okay because it wasn't just looking after widows that are over 60 years old but these widows were then to serve in the church were to serve and work in the church and and have that as their goal in their life because again they've lost their husbands you know that their past childbearing age usually by the 60 you know over 60 years old and again this is a woman that doesn't have family to look after her okay so we need a purpose for her and her purpose is to serve in the church but the younger widows refuse why for when they have begun to wax once and against Christ they will marry so saying look if you take on a widow under this age yes they're going to start serving the church yes they're going to start doing those things but in due time they're going to desire to become to get married again they're going to desire to be remarried okay and that's not that's not a bad thing it's not a bad thing to desire to be remarried it's a godly thing okay if it's a you know biblical widow but look at verse number 12 it says having a damnation because they have cast off their first faith so when a church looks after a widow okay this is kind of like a contractual agreement that this widow will look after the needs for the church will serve in the church and be made available to the brethren okay and so it's it's a serious commitment that if this church is going to look after that widow financially they have to be basically working in the church okay but the younger women refuse them why because at some point they're going to have that desire once again to remarry to have a husband again and they're going to break that commitment they're going to break that covenant between themselves in the church and that's why it brings this reproach that's why it brings this damnation not that they've lost their salvation or anything like that but they've cast off their first way they cast off you know serving in the church okay and I'm just building some context here okay we're not we're not going into the widows I don't want to go into too much detail I mean of course if you have any questions about this you know about widows please let me know but the problem here is that they've broken a contract or they've broken a vow to the Lord to serve in the church because they've gone after entrance and have a desire to get married now we get to verse 14 okay we get to verse 14 I will therefore that the younger women marry okay so it's better for these widows instead of them breaking their vows to the church it's just better if they get married but notice now Paul is not just talking about the widows he's talking about women in general okay I will therefore that the younger women marry and you might be going well hold on Kevin this is Paul's will right because Paul is the one right here I will therefore that the younger women marry but wait a minute the Bible says that all scripture is given by inspiration of Paul no give an inspiration of pastor Kevin no given by inspiration of God you know God is the one who is inspired all scripture and of course when Paul penned these words he was being moved by the Holy Ghost and so when Paul says I will that the younger women marry it's actually God's will okay when we read this we need to understand this is God's will for a young woman that she would marry their children guide the house as we see in his passages and a young lady might say Kevin I don't know what God's will is for my life I don't know what the Lord wants me to do but we see here what God's will is for you to do get married have children guide the house and again so unpopular right I mean I must feel like I would have been better suited living in the 1920s or something right it's like everything changed after World War two that that seems to be the one of the the main game changes in our society because when the men were out there you know fights in the war and then you know all this makes me think was this even a legitimate war or was it programmed to cause you know this family unit to change because men are out there you know fighting the war so they need ladies to get into the workforce okay and so the ladies get into the workforce then they want equal pay you know and then they want to keep their jobs right because they've learned and then all of a sudden like this idea of getting married and having children and just being a housewife all of a sudden is out of fashion okay and that's what that's what drives me to think of World War two was this legit you know I mean obviously it's a legitimate war okay obviously people lost their lives but was it programmed by the higher power above I'm talking ultimately by Satan to change the conditions of how people saw their family lives I don't know I'm just throwing that out there you know Matthew you know a lot of history you can later let me know if you've got some thoughts on that but it's just interesting how you know what God's will is for a woman and let me say this to you you know I've got little girls right and I've never I've never gone to my boys and got them to play with cars and I've never really told my little girls you need to play with dolls and and and but what happens instinctively as a child as a little child you know boys what do they do they get their cars you know they they prefer to fight and to wrestle but girls just instinctively prefer to play with their dolls they prefer to push a pram just as a little child it's inbuilt in them okay and I never sat there telling them hey you need to play with dolls and you need to play with cars? No. It's instinctively this is something God has done in our in our DNA this is just part of our our makeup as human beings to for women to want to have children and and and for men to get out there and work hard you know but point number one point number one get married you know young ladies the first thing that's going to give you satisfaction the first thing God wants in your life is to get married okay and it says young women now obviously the world you know obviously they're against you know being a housewife but they're not necessarily against marriage necessarily okay they kind of they are in a way okay but often okay if you seek the world's advice on marriage what are they going to tell you get married young or get married late in life get married late in life always right they always like I remember when I first got married to Christina I was 22 years old and I remember people in my workplace saying Kevin you're too young you know you need to enjoy your life you know you need to go and experience the world and you know people think I've got to I've got to have a I've got to go and and visit Europe and and visit all these locations because if I don't do this now when I get married I'm going to be tied down and live a miserable life that's the that's the world that's how they picture and paints the married life as this miserable tied down hey enjoy life now while you're young because you're going to regret it when you're later you know or you get married what do people say oh wait wait before you have children wait before you have children you know and we'll get to children soon we'll get that later on but I'm just going to read to you quickly and you don't need to turn there from Genesis 2 18 because we read it last week but you might remember this it said and the Lord God said it is not good that the man should be alone I will make him and help meet for him why did God create a woman why just to have two sexes you know no so the woman would be a help that would be suitable or meet for a man I mean I'm sorry but this is this what the Bible says right the reason a woman exists the reason why you're a woman you've been designed by God is so you could be a helper to a man and obviously that man being your husband okay this is what you've been designed for this is what you've been created for and do you think God wants the best for you of course he does oh there's God just want the best for man and not the best for women of course if his design women for this purpose guess where she's going to find the greatest joy guess where she's gonna find the greatest contentment is serve her purpose okay to serve her purpose you know man was created to need a helper and women were created to be that helper oh that's sexist no we need each other it's complementary you know God made it this way because men need a wife generally speaking right unless again you're that biblical eunuch and then in verse 21 of Genesis 2 you guys know it and and the Lord caused and the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam and he slept and he took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh instead thereof and I truly believe the reason why God took a rib was just so he could picture because obviously Adam was made from the dust God could have created a woman out of dust if you really wanted to write but I feel like he created out of the rib because it's it's it's by his side you know his why a wife ought to be by the side of a man okay and and and of the same flesh Bible talks about there and close up the flesh instead thereof and the rib which the Lord God had taken from man made he a woman and brought her unto the man and Adam said this is now bone of my bones and in this case literally she was okay she was made out of the rib of the man and flesh of my flesh and she shall be called woman because she was taken out of man and so when you marry a woman she is bone of your bone and flesh of your flesh okay maybe not physically like Adam was but yes symbolically she is okay you're one flesh you're one unit your wife is as much is to be looked after and cared for as much as you care for your own body okay you're a team you're united well you should be that's the expectation and verse 24 therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother and shall cleave unto his wife and they shall be one flesh okay that is God's purpose that's why God created a woman is that she would be one flesh with a man okay and so again the very first purpose for a woman was to become a man's wife now you guys know what a spoon is right I mean when you eat a meal why would you take out a spoon to eat your meal why was the spoon designed for what purpose would you use that spoon it's probably because you're eating a meal that's a bit you know that has liquid in it like a soup all right a soup you'd make it makes common sense to take out a spoon and eat your meal with a spoon because the scoop the spoon is gonna be able to hold that liquid okay it's gonna be easy to eat it serves a purpose it's been been designed for that purpose okay but could you eat a steak with a spoon I mean if your wife serves you a piece of steak and she put the spoon out instead of a fork could you eat that meat well you could okay like you could you could use the spoon and stab the meat and try to cut the meat a bit or if you had the help of a knife you could do it you could get through it you know you could pick up the piece of meat with a spoon but it's gonna be a lot of work it's gonna probably fall off the spoon a few times eventually you're gonna get it's gonna look it's it can do other things the spoon can serve other functions but it's not going to be serving its function to the full capacity unless it's doing what it was designed for okay obviously the fork was designed for the steak so you can stab that steak hold it down where you got the knife and cut into it okay now women you've been designed to be the help meat you've been designed to help the man you've been designed to get married to a man and if you bypass this and you think I don't need a man I don't need this life you're not going to find fulfillment in what you're designing created for okay and so I know the world tells you you don't need a man I know the world tells you you know you're better off without a man okay I know that but what God says that's what I designed you for and again if God loves you and he does if God wants you to be happy and he does and he wants you to be find fulfillment in his life which he does then you've got to go with what God designed you for same thing for men who designed you for hard work you need to do that as well you know it's not just you know the design of a woman but men have been designed we covered that last week as well okay so and I'm going to read to you from Genesis 3 16 this is after God cursed Adam and Eve and the curse fell upon man and Satan as well he said answer the woman he said I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception in sorrow thou shall bring forth children okay and thy desire shall be to thy husband and he shall rule over thee listen this is what God says that your desire is to your husband okay ultimately when you when obviously young young girls they probably want to just please mom and dad okay but there comes a point in their time when they start to desire a husband their desire is to a man and they seek and desire to get married this is normal this is a decision should be something that we fight against okay and if there's a young girl that wants to get married we shouldn't be saying hey and well actually I've been doing I've said this many times to my daughter Isabel right I've always told Isabel she doesn't bring it up I say to Isabel Isabel you're not allowed to get married I'm never allowing you to get married right obviously I'm joking okay now I don't say that anymore because she's got five brothers and so like I'm kind of okay with her getting married but I know her brothers will still make it very tough for her to get married right you know her brothers are gonna be very careful to make sure that she selects a good man right if I'm you know you know if I'm not around at least there's other guys looking around you know making sure she's okay and making those right decisions right but yeah I mean obviously I'm joking when I say things like that but we should never be just trying to prevent a girl or a woman from getting married because that's her desire that's what's gonna give her satisfaction that's what God designed her for and because her desire is to her husband then if we are a husband if you're a man that's married you need to understand this that she desires to please you meaning that as men we ought to show her that we love her we ought to show her appreciation for everything she does in our lives because that's what gives her the satisfaction if you're not thanking her if you're not showing her appreciation or love it's going to damage like her contentment okay and so as men we need to be careful about that we need to understand that's her desire to please us to be there for us all right then show the appreciation when she does help us when she is there for us that's what's going to get her through the day that's what's going to get her to continue wanting to serve her family and you know I'm thinking about a lady right now from one of my previous churches Christina would know who I'm talking about but you know she was in her 20s she had a lot of suitors a lot of men that were interested to marry her but she would always call it you know no she didn't want to get married and she would tell you know people in the church I'm never gonna get married you know I don't even have a desire to have a husband you know I don't need to have a husband I don't want to get married and then guess what happened when she turned 30 fine she you know she became desperate when she turned 30 years old she got that she got desperate and and really married married a man I won't say some I guess it doesn't matter anymore but she married a man that was like 10 years her junior she became desperate because all the other men all the other suitors that were there were getting married right you know they were interested in her she wasn't interested so they moved on found a wife got married and eventually she started to see that you know everyone around her was getting married she was she was getting to 30 and obviously she was trying to fight back those desires but it was still there it doesn't matter if she was telling other women I don't want to get married inside of her she knew she wanted to get married inside of her she knew she wanted to fall pregnant and have her own children and this is a problem I'm talking about the same girl here is even though she was going around saying I don't want to get married guess what she was doing she was being flirtatious toward other men in the church I mean why why just not get married and show those affections to your own husband okay rather than try to cause other men maybe to you know have wicked thoughts in their mind and potentially fall for sin or whatever okay thank God thank God she got that settled she got married but I'm just thinking about yeah there's a lot of girls that say I don't ever want to get married and you know that desperate out right they're trying to get married they're desperately trying to do that yeah but you know it's definitely programmed in their DNA now single some single women might say this especially if they've been you know no no suitors have really come their way or you know they're getting on in their age they haven't been married you know they might say something like I'll get you guys to turn to problems 31 please some of you guys know what problems 31 it covers the topic of the virtuous woman but the question becomes you know how can I make men more interested in me and I want to get married but it just seems like no one's really coming my way and the big mistake you're going to make as a woman is to look at the world you're going to look at the world and you're going to see oh what attracts men in the world and I'll try to imitate that you know I'm gonna try to dress more like a harlot all right I'm going to put on you know I'm not against a bit of makeup but you know they're going to splash on you know as much makeup as possible they're going to try to attract men with it with their bodies or whatever you know dress provocatively you know a dress like a harlot and that's what's gonna that if they look at the world that's what's good that's what's gonna happen that they're going to try to dress this way to attract a man now let me say this if you do that you will attract a man okay you will you'll get what you want but let me say that you're going to you're going to get the wrong kind of attraction okay you're not going to find the man that is trying to look for a woman to settle down in you're not going to attract the godly man the stable man the man that's going to love you and look after you and care for you if you go down that direction you will get you will get the you'll get the you know you'll get you'll get the suitors you'll get the attention but you'll get it in the wrong kinds of ways okay now problems 31 explains to us and in this series of the family I am going to cover problems 31 in some detail later on but I just want to get a few pointers here look at what it says there in verse number 10 problems 31 verse 10 it says who can find a virtuous woman okay now what was the instruction to a man to find a wife okay these things go together a man is to search and find a wife but then verse number 10 in positive one who can find a virtuous woman for her price is far above rubies okay now this chapter is about the virtuous woman and if you want to find a husband ladies problems 31 is the guidebook this is what you need to pattern yourself after because look what it says in verse 11 the heart of her husband doth safely trust in her so she have so that she have shall have no need of spoil so that he sorry shall have no need of spoil so a man a godly man okay that's going to look after you that's going to care and cherish for you that has the Lord God as the top of their priority they're looking for a woman they can safely trust him okay they're looking for that virtuous woman they're looking for that woman whose price is above rubies I mean this is common sense right if you came to me and you offered me a ruby or some precious stone or you offered me some rock you found on the side of the road which one would I take which one would you take out of those two things you take the precious stone you wouldn't care about the rock that you found on the road you take the precious stone you know it's rare you know it's valuable and once you have it you're going to look after aren't you you're not going to let it be lost you're going to look after it you're not going to allow thieves to come in and steal it you're going to cherish it look after it you're going to value it you're going to love it you're going to care for it and so if you want to be a woman that's loved and cared for that godly man are looking for then problems 31 is the pattern that you need to set yourself after okay and I strongly encourage our mothers with daughters to read Proverbs 31 with them go through the qualities that you see in this virtuous woman and help your daughters develop these characteristics in their lives help them develop you know these attributes in their life okay but what are parents wanting for their daughters these days I've got a college you know get a high paying job you know instead of going to problems 31 and saying hey this is what we should be patting us patting ourselves after right and you know we won't spend time there right now but mothers I strongly desire you know you know have read this with your daughters and go through it not just for your daughters but also just for your own marriage you know because there's a lot of good pointers as well here for the married woman let's move on let's move on so first Timothy chapter 5 verse 14 we read that already I will therefore that the younger women marry bare children point number two is it's the women's a woman's desire to have children to bear children okay in the Bible there's about seven I didn't count them all there's about seven or eight women that were barren that was struggling to have children and yeah what do they want they wanted to have children it was a desire to you know to you know be fruitful and multiply right to have children and again we talked about what God designed a woman for to be a helper to the man but it's indisputable that the biology of a woman has also been designed and created to fall pregnant and deliver children I mean this is the shape of your body this is how your bones have been developed this is how God has designed you okay to fall pregnant and be able to give birth to children man you know this is so old-school teaching like you know this is this is the truth of the Word of God this is the truth of science biology teaches you these things right and again the feminists of this world this world be like no you're better off not having children or leave it to the last minute and a lot of women take this advice right they get on their contraceptive pills they get on their birth control you know and they make their their womb and their reproductive system a hostile environment to fall pregnant they still fall pregnant but it aborts the child it aborts the baby and a lot of people don't even know this it creates a hostile environment in their bodies they're taking these contraceptive pills years after you know for years and years and years because they're taking on the advice of the world you know don't fall pregnant now you can have children later on but then later on when they want the children their bodies are so hostile to falling pregnant you know it's a bought in children that they can't even fall pregnant well they are falling pregnant but they can't have children of their own and again I've met ladies like this you know that that's got into their 30 years you know they're in their 30s they want to have children and they find themselves now they can't have children you know and I don't ask them but I know why because they've been taking these stupid drugs and they turn their body into a baby killing machine that's not God's plan for us and look I'm getting older like I'm 30 I keep forgetting my 37 I'm getting older I realized I can't run I can't do as much as I used to you know when I jump from up from a high heights now I can't I get pain like it so if I'm gonna have little children that I want to run around and play and need your attention doesn't that make more sense to have them while you're younger all right it doesn't make more sense that's when you can play with them you can keep up with them you can run with them have fun with them if you wait till you're you know old you're gonna have a hard time keeping up with your kids and having that fun you know it just makes common sense that you ought to have children at a young age you know point number two was to bear children and again you know the feminists will be saying and I can't believe you're saying that I can't believe you're saying this is what a woman has woman has been designed for hey these are good things you know it's the world that caused evil good and good evil but the Bible says now these are good things getting married having a husband having children this is what's going to give you joy right the feminist you know the feminists you know you know what they're what they think they're fighting against a man centric world you know you know we can't just allow all the men to call those shots we've got to fight about you know we need our equal rights or whatever you know we need to fight against men you know I know I really feel like man like men biblical men that the whole concept is being destroyed all right anyway we're going to that right now but here's the reality of it it's not that they're fighting men they're fighting God it's God that designed it this way you know it's God that wrote the Bible it's not like men wrote the Bible to control their wives okay God wrote it because it knows what's good for man and woman and this is again why the feminist movement is filled with God hating women they know they hate God they hate the fact that God has designed them this way and are they happy women when you see these women on TV pro they're not happy they're miserable you know their lives are miserable they're trying to make other people around them miserable if they just got rid of this ideology and said you know what maybe I'll become a wife and have kids they'll be happy again you know and what do they cut their hair they look butchering like they look like men you know I mean that they just hate God they hate God and they hate what God has designed them for and yet God is like no hey this is what I designed for you for you're gonna be miserable otherwise you're gonna be miserable otherwise seeking what you think you know what's what you think is valuable but the other point that I wanted to draw from this it says bare children okay bare children so plural more than one child okay so it's not God's plan like for a family unit to just be parents and child but God also wants that family unit to have siblings okay for children to have their own brothers and sisters because that's part of their development okay they're going to learn how to interact and they're going to learn how to because you know obviously kids argue and have fights and and they don't think life is fair and this and that and they think mom and dad prefer this child you know this is part of their character growth this is part of the development to grow up and mature and that way when they when they get into the real world they've really learned how to deal with other people around them rather than growing up selfishly you know many times when when when there's one child in the marriage that child is spoiled rotten now not just by the parents but by the uncles and the grandparents and they become just selfish people in the world they're looking out for you know number one they're looking out for themselves rather than caring about other people it's important you know if we get married not just have the one child but to consider God wants to have children you know plural God wants to have more than one and of course this isn't just a concept here in this is found throughout the whole Bible I mean Genesis 1 28 I just read to you and God blessed them and said unto them talking to Adam and Eve be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth and subdue it be fruitful and divide multiply okay so if you've got mom and dad that's one and two people and God wants you to multiply the minimum I guess it's two if you go to multiply by one that's two kids but I'm not even sure if that's really been multiplied right I think multiplication is meaning more than what you started with okay so your minimum you should be aiming for the third child you know all the fourth child or etc you know this is God's plan and you know if you haven't got that many kids I'm not having to go you this is just what God has you know instituted you know God says be fruitful and multiply he wants this earth to be replenished over and over why because obviously previous generations you know die and pass on God wants this world to be populated God wants us to be fruitful and multiply and you know if you're a barren woman and you're you know you're a Christian you need to hold God to that promise that his desire for you is to multiply I think there's nothing wrong we see this with Hannah saying his mom praying that God would give her children she prayed in fact for one one man one child which was Samuel and God gave her I think another six kids was it six or seven kids I can't remember God gave above what she was actually even asking for you know we see this over and over in the Bible these these barren women full pregnant you know and with multiples as well and you might be saying well why why does God want us to have children I'll just quickly read to you from Malachi 2 15 but we're talking about this is a reference to husbands and he says and did and did not he make one yet had he the residue of the Spirit and wherefore one so why why did he make like husband and wife one what's the purpose before it for that that he might seek a godly seed that he may seek a godly seed therefore take heed to your spirit and let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth hey look after your wife men look after your your wives and have a godly seed God is seeking a generation a seed that is godly that loves him that was a serve him okay we need as Christians we need to really understand this why is our world becoming less Christian why is our world why is our new generations carrying less for church carrying less for the things of God I'll tell you why because Christians are on birth control that's why okay because we're not no longer wanting that godly seed we no longer want children and a godly generation to win this world but let me just tell you it's my desire as a pastor and obviously you guys know this with our tenth child on the way that we would raise a godly seed I know that all my kids aren't necessarily gonna be pastors and missionaries whatever doesn't matter but if I can raise them to love the Lord if I can raise them to love the gospel in Jesus Christ and to love the lost then they're going to be out there knocking doors right instead of it being just me and Christina we now have a team of ten more they're gonna be out out and able to get out there knock doors and preach the gospel could you imagine if all of God's people took this on board and said hey we're going to multiply be fruitful and multiply we're going to raise that godly seed that's important by the way it's not just falling pregnant and having children that's the easy part it's raising a godly seed it's raising children that's the challenge that's where it begins you know that's a challenge and you know we need to raise them to serve the Lord it's it's the Lord he's seeking guys he's seeking a godly seed the question is are we going to give it to him you know are we going to do that I truly believe you know you should have as many kids as the Lord will give you that's I truly believe that you know and that sounds crazy you know people look at my family and they think we're nuts don't they they think we're nuts but and if you know before I got married if you told me I'd have ten kids I think you're nuts I think you're nuts but it's it's normal now like this is our life this is how it is you know if we have you know how Isabel comes and sees you guys like sometimes on Sundays Sunday afternoons and stuff whatever I feel like something's missing well it's just one child there's the other you know the other eight are over there but there's something missing right because it's normal to have this many kids you know out mentally we we we are counts of each one of them in our hearts so people say oh how can you love so many kids you know well somehow God multiplies your love in your heart and it's not like you love each child less it's in fact in your heart your love grows even more because you have the more kids that you can love right and so somehow just programmed in a family that has a lot of kids somehow you're accounting or each one of them even if one of them is just missing you know something's missing it's it's it's obvious something's missing something's not you know in sync you know when a child's missing anyway let's get to the third point the third point and that's obviously I'm not sure where you guys are in the Bible but first Timothy 5 14 which the third point was to guide the house right bear children guide the house now the first thing I just want to bring to your attention before we get into too much about guiding the house notice the order notice the order get married have children guide the house okay the order is important you know it doesn't say you know have children and then so it doesn't say have children and then get married does it okay it doesn't have children then get married it doesn't say get married and then guide the house no before guiding the house you have children why because wives are not there to guide their husbands okay when you guide your house it's because you have children to guide the husband is the head of the wife God has these things in order for a purpose okay and this is the third thing that's going to give great contentment to a woman is to be able to guide the house now the man should be at work the man should be earning a paycheck you know looking after their family that requires someone to look after the kids in that family you either you have the option guys to look after your own children or give your children to another person to look after and raise you got those two options obviously we know what God's option what God wants he wants the wife he wants the woman to be there guiding their house you know Titus 2 5 calls this being keepers at home that's where the whole idea of being a housekeeper or a homekeeper comes from okay keeping their home guiding the house now again it's not like the man should drop all responsibility well that's your that's your thing to deal with wife no you're accountable man your husband you're accountable for what happens but you know you know the man is accountable to Jesus Christ but the wife is accountable to her husband okay and I don't know I mean I I give Christina a lot of freedom you know Christina asked me now and every now and again do you think I should do this you think I should do it this way and I give her my thoughts but ultimately she knows best because she's the one that's there raising the kids right I give her all the freedom in the world it's not like my micro manager and say have you done this have you done that have you done this have you done that you know if Christina's forgotten to do something in the house I don't I just think okay she just couldn't get around though other priorities in place that were more important that she has to deal with then just deal with this one little issue you know she has all the freedom in the world and I truly believe husbands you ought to give your wives that freedom to decide what to do okay again they've been designed to be that helper they've been designed to bear children they've been designed to guide a house now this is why businesses they like to hire women as the receptionist okay they like to hire women as their secretary and administrators because they're really good at looking after the office they're really good at having things organized you know essentially they're working like a wife for a business for their boss okay but would you rather do that job for some strange man or be doing putting that same effort the same organization skills that you have and women are great at multitasking women tend to have a great memory this is what they're good at wouldn't you rather be doing that for your own husband wouldn't you rather be doing that for your children rather than you know your boss rather than some strange man okay so it doesn't you know it's just a strange thing you know oh there's so much more value working for you know some some other guy rather than your own husband this is crazy you know the women the wife's desire is to her husband the Bible says that's what God has instilled in them and again you know God makes it easy for us God makes it easy this is why you tend unless you know well Cindy and Christina would disagree with this a little bit because you've had twins but normally you have one child at a time right first you get married you get used to being a husband and wife you know you start to you know love one another I get to know one another try to you know adjust and get used to one another try to change things if you're annoying one another whatever and then God gives us that child right at least nine months later God gives us that first child and then you know that first child is a learning ground you've never been a mother before you know you've got to learn everything you're going to learn the ropes what it is to you know how often a child needs to be fed how it needs to be clothed how often you need to get a shower a bath or whatever and then you know how to raise it how to nurture it how to teach that child and then God sends you the second child doesn't he the second child but by now you don't have to relearn all those things you've already learnt it the first time so now your time is dedicated to applying to the second child what you learnt with the first child and if you've done a good job with the first child that first child the other child is going to set a good example to the next child okay but now you're learning other things you're learning about siblings you're you're they're fighting right and you're learning how do I make good judgment how do I decide who's wrong and who's right right and and then God gives you another child and another child but it's progressive it's one thing at a time and then you know mothers once you've had three four five kids and you look at the mother we've won who's struggling you're like man why they struggling everybody got one but again remember because they're going through that process right they're going through that process it's a gradual thing God has designed it this way so we can learn slowly okay so it's not this huge pressure this huge burden that causes to fall apart and get stressed and break down or whatever you know and this is why it's not good to be a single parent you know to fall pregnant and then get married because now the man instead of getting used to a wife now they've got to get used to a wife and a child you know and so it can't it's out of whack it's out of whack it makes it more difficult you know I'm not saying that you can't rectify things and get back on track I'm just saying that initial process that God has put in our place is out of whack and makes your life a lot harder okay but you can still work through that it's still possible to work through that the last thing I wanted to say here and this comes from problems 31 I don't know if maybe you're there problems 31 I don't know but 27 verse 27 it says talking about the virtuous woman it says she looketh well to the ways of her household and eateth not the bread of idleness okay so this virtuous woman looketh well to the ways of her household you know she looks to do the best for her family and again fathers and husbands we need to remember this you know we can't just criticize our wives when things go wrong we ought to know that in built in her she's looking well to her family she's trying her best maybe she needs a bit of guidance maybe she needs a bit of help if things aren't working instead of your criticism because the Bible says she's looking well to her household okay now notice notice that it says that she's busy she doesn't eat the bread of idleness and you guys know this why because motherhood is a full-time job it's a full-time job from morning to night okay and this is why you haven't got time to eat the bread of idleness you haven't got the time to watch dr. Phil and to watch you know Oprah Winfield she's no longer on TV anymore right to watch those soap operas that's another open that I should be watching either you know soap operas Oprah Winfield dr. Phil you haven't got the time to eat the bread of idleness but to look well to your household okay because it's a full-time job but again the world thinks are you just watching TV all day you know raising your kids watching TV no it shouldn't be that way you know this is important because if you go back to go back to our first Timothy chapter 5 first Timothy chapter 5 there is a bit of a danger here and it goes really well with what we saw them problems 31 okay look at verse 13 second Timothy chapter 5 verse 13 it says actually just bear with me guys and I've got let's see verse 13 yeah so we talked about how a younger widow ought to get married rather than sort of take on those responsibilities of serving the church and then it says in verse 13 and with all so what that means is we've others so with other young ladies and we've all they learn to be what idol now the virtuous woman is not idle right she's busy she's working for her family okay but young women that don't get married will learn to be idle and what do they do when they become idle wandering about from house to house or Facebook profile to Facebook profile that's another way right that's now that's what they do now and not only idle so actually they're not idle but toddlers also so gossipers and busybodies speaking things which they ought not so look doesn't matter a young woman is always going to be busy either she's going to be busy looking after a house or she's going to be the busybody wandering about from house to house gossiping getting involved in other people's business and just causing problems everywhere she goes okay this is the problem for young women that refuse to get married they become the gossipers and then look at verse 14 I will therefore that younger women marry all right so that again and we know that verse but that's why okay because they're going to be busy one way or another better be busy in a productive way they're better than a destructive way and and you know some might say well hold on Kevin you know what about a woman that's in the workplace aren't they busy aren't they busy working in the workplace I'm just speaking from my own experience I've worked with a lot of women okay and even in the workplace guess what I find toddlers and busybodies okay and criticizing their husbands criticizing their families you know telling other women how they ought to how they ought to live their lives and or talking back behind the back of another woman that's what I found in the workplace oh they're busy oh they're still not they're still busybodies okay because they're not busy looking after their own family looking after their own husband and children look at look at verse 14 again we talked about the three things marry their children guide the house because look at this give non-occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully so if you're not doing these things if these are not your goals in your life you're not working to all these things it says you're giving occasion you're giving space to the devil to the adversary look at verse 15 for some are already turned aside after Satan okay there are already young ladies in these churches that aren't doing what they meant to do and and it says here they're already after the after Satan's way they're already going after Satan or in what way what we just saw their house-to-house busybody busybodies gossipers that's the way of Satan that's what Satan wants for a woman that's the will of a woman from Satan but God's will for a woman was obviously marry their children guide the house now I've heard men go oh yeah yeah God really knows women really well you know he knows they gossipers he knows they're busybodies it's not just women it's men also okay look look at go to second Thessalonians chapter 3 second Thessalonians chapter 3 verse 10 so I'm just I'm defending you women just a little bit now okay second Thessalonians chapter 3 verse 10 second Thessalonians chapter 3 verse 10 because again what's the first thing God wants from a man to be working a job right the first thing look at verse number 10 second Thessalonians chapter 3 verse 10 for even when we were with you this we commanded you that if any would not work neither should he eat this is a reference to men right neither should he eat if it doesn't work now why what's the problem verse 11 for we hear that there are some which walk among you disorderly look at this working not at all but a busybodies now now them that are such we command and exhort by our Lord Jesus Christ that we've quietness they work and eat their own bread okay so look men as well if men are not working okay they're not working a job guess what they're gonna be doing busybodies going around in other people's business just like a woman just like a woman right so but this is the problem okay idleness not doing what God has required from us will cause us just to basically be terrible people okay going around annoying others you know trying to get involved in their life trying to tell them what they ought to do with their life all the while your life's not going swell you know you need to you know work in your own life so just in conclusion guys actually you know what no I'm gonna give you one more story sorry I maybe I've got a bit long but you want a story because this is just really come to my attention just a few months ago I won't give you too much information as to why but let me just say this am I against Christina am I against my wife going out with her girlfriends going out with her friends and having a good time you know just having a bit of you know a catch-up session with her friends or of course not of course not but you know what happens generally speaking a lot of the times ladies want to go out and get out of the house it's because I just can't handle it anymore the kids are out of control my husband's not there for me you know and I need to get out of the house I need to go meet up with my girlfriends just advance and get things off my chest and guess what they're doing when that's happening gossiping busybodies criticizing negative that's what happens okay now am I against that I'm not against the the catch-up and the fellowship and the friendship of course not okay um it's not happening so much now but in Sydney Christina would often catch up with her friends you know and I would just say honey yeah go for it I'll go for the kids and you know we'll play play whatever have fun you know with the kids whatever but here's what happens if a woman is has a good marriage if a woman has obedient children faithful children and they guide in their house well and then they want to catch up with the friends do you think they're gonna be gossiping and being busybodies do you think they're gonna be talking negative do you think they're gonna be criticizing their husbands no you know obviously the conversation will be totally different okay obviously though it'll be words of edification it'll be encouraged and we encourage in fellowship right it's not going to be criticizing their families okay so I'm not against having that fun catching up with your friends but you need to understand that God wants you to get these things in place first okay you can't think I'm just gonna get out of the house and think somehow fix themselves at home no you look if you've got that free time use that free time to fix the things in your house use that free time to fix your marriage to to teach your children obedience maybe you gotta pull out the rod use that time to pull out the rod and and you know you know discipline your kids every time you tell them you will and you haven't done it go back and fix that account that that's left hanging you know you know use the time wisely and I'm giving you a real example here and I won't go into too much detail you know names and things like that but I know that there are Christian women who supposedly on the outside have a great marriage catch up with all their friends and as the Bible says let me just go back there as the Bible said in sorry verse number first Timothy where are my notes there's my Bible here verse number 13 first Timothy 5 13 and we've all they learn to be idle wandering about from house to house and not only idle but toddlers also and busybodies look at this speak in things which they ought not speak in things which they ought not and the example I'm thinking about of so-called Christian women talking about their past boyfriend's married women Christian women catching up talking about their previous boyfriend's talking about their first kisses do you think that's something a married woman ought to be talking about why do you think that's coming out of their mouth I'll tell you why because they've got problems in their marriage they've got problems in their family and I just just idle chitchat it's idle chitchat it's a problem it's things that they ought not to be speaking about do you think that's productive language you think it's productive speech if anything it could cause adultery right reminiscing about your past boyfriend's or girlfriends what do you think that's going to lead you to do start thinking about them oh maybe I'll check on Facebook and see what they're up to these days maybe I'll send them a little message hey how's things going this is where disaster happens you know and we're talking about women right now it's on our ladies right I've already spoke about men last week but you know how we know that you have a good marriage you know how we know you have faithful children and God in the house always that's problems it's by what comes out of your mouth now what's coming out of your mouth are you criticizing your family you know look and this is why I'm doing a series on family and marriage because it's not easy it's not like this is all easy stuff and it just comes naturally no all of this requires work marriage requires work raising children requires work educating your kids requires work getting them to love the Lord and care about doctrine requires work bringing your children to church requires work all of these things are hard which is why the world would prefer not to do it which is why the world prefers to find another way but they try to find another way and they're more miserable it's worse God's way is always right it's always worth it when you worked for it I mean everyone that's that's like if you if people just gave you money you'd waste it if you didn't work for it but if you work for it you know the value of it and you appreciate it when you have it same thing with a family and same thing with a marriage so just in conclusion guys what is God's will for a woman what did God design a woman for what are the instinctive goals for a woman what gives a woman life satisfaction contentment and meaning number one that they marry number two that they bear children and number three that they guide their house raising that godly seed all right let's pray