(Disclaimer: This transcript is auto-generated and may contain mistakes.) All right, they're in Proverbs 22. I was just going through the Proverbs. I don't know if you regularly go through Proverbs yourselves, but this one just jumped out at me. In verse number 24 it says, make no friendship with an angry man and with a furious man thou shalt not go. The title for the sermon tonight is avoid the angry man. Avoid the angry man. Now I would say that in my life I have made friendships with angry men. Probably I, and I was usually when I was younger, when I was a little bit more immature in the faith and you know I probably can say I had two friends that were angry men where I tried my best to reach out to them and you know I count friendship as a very valuable thing. Like for me I look at you all and you're all my friends. Like I care for you. I love you. If there's anything that I can do to help make your life a little bit easier I'll try to do that. Like not just as your pastor but as a friend. You know as someone that just I generally kind of like people you know and I remember the reason I like people is because you know I think about how God created each one of us. He's given us a personality. He sent Jesus Christ to die for us and for God to love the world and you know God of course loved mankind even though we were sinners against him and so just my natural disposition is to sort of like people and sometimes that can get me into trouble because I can make friendships with the wrong kind of people and yeah I've had the experience of being our friends with an angry man and then it says in verse 25 why are we being warned not to make friendship with an angry man? He says lest thou learn his ways and get a snare to thy soul. So the reason we see here the reason God does not want us to make friends with an angry man is because anger is contagious. You're around an angry person you're going to start getting angry all right and yes that's what I observed in my life when I had friends that were angry I found myself getting angry at least with my first friend you know everything they would complain and whine about things that I didn't think were worth complaining about eventually I started to see that point oh yeah and I started getting frustrated I started getting angry over the same things. I started to learn my lesson much later in life when I had a friend later on in life that was an angry person and I started to realize oh they want to influence you these friends that are angry they want to influence you to make you angry as well I started to understand this okay and so it's it's like why would you want to make friendship with an angry man well the angry man actually wants to make friends to influence you okay they get something out of making other people angry as well you know why is it that some people are so negative you know constantly whining and complaining is because they're trying to justify uh themselves and if they see you get upset and angry about the same things they feel justified in their complaints and in their anger etc okay but you see here in verse 25 it says and get a snare to thy soul a snare is a trap it's gonna trap you okay you're gonna find yourself hey I wasn't naturally angry but I've become angry because I've chosen the wrong friends that I you know the wrong type of friends that I have around me and sometimes because we are friends we want to be faithful we want to be loyal we stick around with these people a lot longer than we should my experience with the second angry man the second angry friend that I had is our relationship I felt like became a game not a fun game like games are fun but this is not a fun game and I felt like the game was this my friend would get angry about something and his game the way that he would win his game is try to get me angry about that and then my game was not getting angry like on purpose even though even if I felt like he had a legitimate reason to get angry about it I just felt like you know what I'm gonna play the game and be like you know what it's not a big deal it's not a big deal and I'd see what would happen what happens when someone is angry you know and trying to make a big deal about a situation you look at it go you know what's not a big deal they get angry at you they get angry at you why don't you see it the way I see it it's like whoa why are you getting mad at me like you know you're angry about this or angry at that why are you angry at me I just don't see the big problem that you see and I feel like there's this sort of this game this relationship but it wasn't fun it wasn't a fun game and you know I didn't really learn this lesson I didn't hear this kind of preaching at church to avoid the angry man and so I don't know if you've got friends that are angry people or I don't know maybe outside of church maybe you yourselves are an angry person and you need to be aware of this because you might find that your circle of friends might start to pull away from you because of your character now let's quickly keep your finger there in Proverbs we are going to spend most of our time in Proverbs come with me to Ephesians chapter 4 please Ephesians chapter 4 Ephesians chapter 4 and verse number 26 Ephesians chapter 4 verse number 26 now very quickly I think most people in this church are already aware of this but anger in of itself is not a sin okay most churches will teach us anger is a sin and so what happens is the congregation becomes these very passive I sort of I kind of find it disgusting like like when it's right to get angry they just refuse to get angry but there is a time to get angry this is the commandment right in Ephesians where did I sorry where did I get to turn to 426 all right here we've got a commandment from God Ephesians 4 26 be ye angry so we have the commandments hey get angry say whoa hold on I don't want to be the angry man but it says here be angry and sin not all right so it's possible to be angry and not sin okay but at the same time it is possible to be angry and sin right anger can definitely to sin it continues by saying let not the sun go down upon your raft neither give place to the devil the devil can utilize your anger for wicked things all right but you can see here we are given a commandment to get angry so that doesn't make sense to me are we supposed to get angry are we not supposed to get angry you know what this is exactly the same this is exactly the same when it comes to whether we should hate or not hate you know what's the lesson that we've learned in over this church of the many years it's right to hate what God hates all right it's right to love what God loves and when is it right to get angry it's right to get angry if God gets angry about that same thing right get angry with what God gets angry about but if you get angry about something that God is not angry about that's the sin okay now you're in Ephesians 4 26 uh be angry we have that commandment but come with me to verse number 30 verse number 30 and this is why we need to be careful about the wrong type of anger you know the one that might be contagious from your angry friends it says in Ephesians 4 30 and grieve not the holy spirit of God whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption you see each one of us that are saved we have the holy spirit of God living inside of us and we can grieve God we can grieve the holy spirit of God how well look at there's a list here of what we need to do verse number 31 let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and evil speaking be put away from you with all malice and be ye kind one to another tender-hearted forgiving one another even as God for Christ's sake have forgiven you and so you can see in the same chapter we're told don't get angry because it grieves the holy spirit but then later on we have the commandment get angry or sorry before that get angry it's a commandment but sin not you see when we sin in our anger that grieves the holy spirit of God and look the wrong kind of anger will lead you in verse number 32 instead of doing these things in verse number two the wrong kind of anger is going to lead you to not do this be kind one to another okay if you're getting angry with brothers and sisters in our church and it's stopping you from being kind you've got the wrong kind of anger okay tender-hearted forgiving one another if you're unable to forgive your brother or sister in the Lord you've got the wrong kind of anger okay even as God for Christ's sake have forgiven you all right now what I love about God God is often described as a God who is angry I'll just quickly read to you from Psalm 7 11 God judgeth the righteous and God is angry with the wicked every day God is angry with the wicked every day God is angry every single day okay but he's angry at the wicked so what can we get angry about we can get angry with the wicked we can get angry with wickedness okay the things that God gets angry about we can get angry about as well but look we're given the commandment not to make friends with the angry man hey we are commanded to be friends with God Abraham was a friend to God all right we I want to be a friend to God but of course God is not an angry man in the context of what we're reading about here so what we want to do is be able to differentiate between righteous anger and anger of a man or anger of the flesh okay and really what we want to do because it's you know you can form friendships and and certain loyalties and you may not have the experience or the ability to identify what is the angry man that I need to avoid okay and so because we started in Proverbs we're going to spend most of our time in Proverbs what I want to do here is help you identify the angry man the angry friend that God wants you have to have nothing to do with and look if you find some of these qualities in your life then you need to remove that out of your life as well okay so it goes both ways it might be somebody that you're friends with or it might be characteristics that you have within yourself that you need to overcome so come back with me to Proverbs and come with me to Proverbs chapter 12 Proverbs chapter 12 and uh Johnny can you give me a glass of water please or a cup of water so come with me to Proverbs 12 please Proverbs 12 and verse number 16 we want to identify from the book of Proverbs what an angry man is who what is the man what is the kind of friends that we are to avoid Proverbs chapter 12 verse number 16 it says a fool's wrath is presently known a fool's wrath rap is anger right extreme form of anger it's presently known meaning they want to talk about what they're angry about they'll tell you today they don't want to hide it they want to speak about their anger they want to speak about what they're angry about and then it says but a prudent man covereth shame you see we can both get angry about something but a man that is prudent someone that is careful not quick to anger they're going to try to cover that they don't want everybody to know about what they're getting angry about hey but the angry man that you're to avoid they can't help but speak presently straight away what they're upset about okay meaning they lack self-control regarding their mouth you know it's it's instead of something happening happening and then down the track maybe venting a little bit speaking to you about it no just immediately they just need you to know that they're angry about this situation you know and look when it comes to whining and complaining the things i hate the most as as a father as a pastor just as a regular human being see the reason i hate it so much is because people that one complain all the time they feel they're saying something of value oh i found a problem oh i'm angry about something but you know problem finding is the easiest thing to do in life there's problems everywhere there's problems at churches there's problems in at work there's problems in families there's problems in everybody's life that's easy and then whining and complaining oh that problem or that problem or that problem what do they want to do they want to be influential they want to cause you to get angry and upset and frustrated that's the easiest thing to do being a problem seeker easy being a solution maker very hard being a solution maker is very hard what do we see about the prudent man in verse 16 but a prudent man cover of shame all right so the prudent man might say okay look yes this issue frustrated me but you know what now that i assessed it now that i'm removing the emotions out of this it's just a storm in a teacup yeah it's a bit frustrating but it's so it's so minor it's so insignificant i'm just gonna cover i'm not even gonna worry about it you know i'm not going to proclaim it from the rooftops i'm not gonna go around everybody complaining and whining about this and that hey that's what the prudent man does another way you can understand that pretty man cover of shame is that he's ready to offer a solution okay okay there's an issue all right what's the solution let's fix it all right instead of whining getting angry about it let's just fix it that's a better thing to do you know that's the wise thing to do that's the prudent thing to do that's not the foolish thing to do hey let's fix it and you know for those of you that i've been your pastor for some time you know that hey pasa there's a problem i'm like so what's the solution okay you discover the problem well done we can all do that but what's the solution i want to see your character i want to see if you're the prudent man i want to see if you're the one that wants to try to find the solution and fix it because yeah look pointing problems anybody can do it anybody can do it okay it's the easiest thing to do right we got little if you have little children all right you know what's easy ah uh little little little johnny little little joey has a dirty nappy that's you know anyone can smell that a mile away that's easy but who's willing to change a nappy that's that's a solution that requires a bit of effort that requires a bit of character you know to go into the mess clean it up and fix it okay but anybody can smell a bit of a problem and point it out but there's no value in that okay the value is in the solution and what you find with the angry man they just complain they whine they'll find this problem they'll find and they will find problems and you in your loyalty of being a friend you're going to be like you know what you're pointing out legitimate things yeah of course it's legitimate but like i said you're never going to solve every problem on this earth okay better be the one that cover a shame okay the one that provides a solution or you're able to determine this is a small matter this is insignificant why am i getting why am i getting so bothered about this you know it's so insignificant compared to all the other issues that i have to deal with in life come with me to proverbs 14 proverbs 14 so yeah all i did brethren i just went through the book of problems i was looking up words like anger like wrath like rage all right and just trying to see hey you know how can i identify this man that i ought not to be friends with proverbs 14 verse 16 proverbs 14 16 says a wise man fearth and departeth from evil all right if you're wise you see something evil something harmful and you're like you know what i'm not going to go there you know what i'm going to avoid that i'm not going to get myself involved in that mess but what do we see with the angry man he says but the full rager and his confidence all right the full rager right there's rage in that person a rage is someone that expresses their anger and their displeasure instead of departing from evil they chase the evil they put their nose in the evil right they try to uh you know they love it you know that they want to find turmoil and problem and and get themselves involved it says and his confidence they feel like i could just go up to that evil and i'm not going to get harmed i'm going to throw my two cents in there i'm going to show them my anger i'm going to show them my displeasure hey you know like i said here you see that the wise man runs from the evil avoids the evil but the angry man runs to evil okay you know this reminds me of if i can you know borrow from brother oliver with the driving instructions right road right road rage isn't that what it's called road rage look have i gotten angry on the road before of course you know someone cutting me off or even someone that's may you know might be at red lights and they haven't progressed as soon as he went green like come on i'm in a rush or whatever it is right i i so yeah i can get angry you know behind the wheel but there are some people that have no self-control that's why it's called road rage and they'll tailgate a car you know for a long journey they'll beep though you know just the other day i was coming out of my house and there was a neighbor coming out and you know there's a bit of a tight space because there's some other family moving and he kind of stopped and i thought okay stop so i just thought okay stop i guess it's stopping for me so i started to drive and when i drove he drove and he's like and he looks at me like it's like a big deal who cares like it's like nothing happens like there's an accident it's not like we'll delay 10 minutes to go from point a to point b but road rage right just just ridiculous like look if if i'm someone that's having a bad day maybe you know not you know just my life is falling apart having a bad day and all of a sudden someone's beeping at me and showing an ugly face right i mean you in a fit of rage someone can just walk out of that car and and do all kinds of damage anything can happen in a situation like that i mean i've seen videos of this on youtube and they're like you know road rage where just one minor little issue and people are out of their cars with with uh crowbars or even with guns in the united states and before you know it you know someone's getting hit by a car or there's some great damage being done all right that's the angry man the angry man doesn't go okay that's a bad situation i'm just gonna avoid it i'm just gonna go my way they run to it they want to demonstrate their rage so this is the kind of person you want to avoid now look as i'm going through this list you might identify some of these things in your life potentially and if you say pastor actually one of those points that's me you're not necessarily the angry man right like we all have moments in our flesh but we have a bad day okay bad thoughts i've had moments in my life where i've been so angry and i've done something that i regret later on like how did i why what happened like how did i do that okay obviously when we talk about the angry man this is a man that is demonstrating this pattern continually in his life we all have points that we get upset frustrated right we all have points where we let ourselves down we do something or we think something or say something that we later go to regret i'm not talking about hey the moment your friend gets angry that's it have nothing to do with them you're not really much of a friend if that's you but obviously if you start seeing a pattern red flags continual pattern in fact we'll touch upon that very soon okay that's the kind of person you need to be asking yourself you know what god i don't think this person is good for my soul i don't think this person is good for my my uh my time i you know it's it's taken a lot out of me it's depressing me it's it's making me angry it's making me frustrated lord you're in proverbs 14 look at verse number 17 proverbs 14 17 he that is soon angry dealeth foolishly and a man of wicked devices is hated someone that is soon angry someone that is quick quick to anger someone that is quick to anger you're in the same you're saving the same chapter look at verse number 29 rather it says he that is slow to wrath is of great understanding but he that is hasty of spirit exalts of folly so look we can see here being slow to wrath is a positive attribute right so when it's slow to wrath is of great understanding you know what that means because you're slow to get angry you're looking at the situation and you're assessing look am i overreacting all right like when someone does me wrong i'm commonly thinking i'm commonly hoping i i hope they had the right intentions there maybe they meant to do right and just come across the wrong way i don't like to chat too much via text because you lose the tone right you know you could be joking but he may not come across as a joke via text all right you can say something insensitive though you may not have really thought about it right but someone that is slow to anger you stop and assess you know am i misreading this text message am i overreacting too quickly you know i'm sure they probably had the right intentions have i misunderstood am i overreacting am i getting angry because i've had a bad day and like if i didn't have that bad day what they just said wouldn't have bothered me that much you know i you know your son should to figure out exactly this thing that has frustrated me and offended me you're slow you know you're you're you know thinking about you know is this something worth being angry about and that's why this person is of great understanding but what we see in verse number 17 here that is soon angry deal foolishly being soon angry in a short temper and what's interesting about that same man in a man of wicked devices is hated so wicked devices is basically speaking about that that soon to angry person they plan on taking revenge they plan on causing damage right they they you know they're straight away thinking how do i get back to the person that has made me angry or you know how do i get back to the situation and cause further damage how do i add further fuel to the fire someone that is soon angry so i don't know do you have a friend like this you know maybe you do and maybe you like me i'm like you know what i just passed i've got a friend like that and i just thought i had to be a good friend and be patient and and stomach all their issues and just be uh you know uh be always there for them to vent and complain i just got to take it and i've got to be just i'm going to be the best friend i can i'll soon talk to you about how you can be the best friend you can in a situation like that but first of all you'd rather avoid that to begin with right avoid the angry man right lest they learn his ways and get a snare for thy soul come with me to proverbs 15 proverbs 15 verse number one again we're identifying the angry man you start to see all these qualities consistently in their life not a one-off consistently in the life you better avoid this person okay but proverbs 15 verse one it says a soft answer turneth away wrath but grievous words stir up anger i had to learn this i had to go look i was um i've said many times i was put into this position as a manager of a call center okay customer service and when when you're a company and you know back then i was you know in the early what was it it was like 2012 roughly i think it was you know it was the company that i was i was working for was sending out a thousand packages a day and look you think a thousand packages are going to arrive within 24 hours that was a promise it's not going to happen you've got large companies especially in wa with the big mine companies that you know they might have a um you know machinery and they need like a single part and like every hour that machinery is down they're losing tens of thousands of dollars of revenue and that part doesn't arrive on time yeah people are calling people are complaining and my style i never worked in a like i never worked in a call center i never worked the job where i'm answering calls and but i was made a manager of that place and then i found hey people are like hey can i talk to your manager and you know those are the ones that are escalated they're really huffing and puffing they're really upset and i didn't know how to handle it because i've never worked i've never i've never done that kind of job all right i mean i knew how to manage teams and you had to manage people i knew how to manage processes and you had to make improvements and how to increase sales and how to decrease costs but dealing with angry customers is not something i was used to so what did i have to do went to the book of proverbs say lord help me to appease angry people how do i do it lord you know because god's word works everywhere right i mean really like you sometimes we have this idea that god's word is for church and you know that's where i'm gonna apply it applies in all areas of life and i started to realize wow it says here that a soft answer turn off away wrath but grievous words stir up anger and if there were times that customers would say awful things you know about me or about my employees or about our business and ah you can feel the anger signs a ball inside but man i've got to give that soft answer but what we see here look at look at verse 18 as well it repeats a similar in a similar way verse 18 a raffle man stir up strife but he that is slow to anger appease of strife you know another characteristic that you'll identify of an angry person is they their words cause more anger their words cause more strife okay it's like well you know they've got this pattern you know like what kind of reputation or what kind of track record does this individual have are they constantly arguing are they constantly fighting with that person and that person and i started to realize amongst my these friends that i had they were constantly at odds with people around them everybody they were always fighting with that person always fighting and i'm just trying to be this faithful friend and i'm thinking man it's very easy for me to fight you as well but i'm trying to be a loyal friend right again i had the wrong idea of what a friend should be i should have known what god's word said step away from certain people but you start to notice a track record with certain people right if they're constantly bickering constantly in strife constantly whining constantly angry constantly in arguments with people forever you're starting to see a track record a reputation of that person or you'll find another person when there is a hot issue when there is an argument when there is a contention where somebody can step in and somehow cause develop peace between people harm the situation down right instead of throwing throwing fuel in the fire they're fire fighting you know they're maintaining you know friendships and look what kind of person are you now if you're throwing a situation when there's argumentation and maybe you're getting heated up what kind of words will come out of your mouth will your words cause further strife or are your words those that will appease calm the situation down and look are you known for angering people you know and i've met people that take joy in angering people i know there are people that take joy in pushing people's buttons see what kind of reaction i can get out of that person look that's the kind of friend you don't want to be part of they want anger they want contention they want straw you know and so when you see this amongst your friends again what kind of track record do they have what kind of track record do they have proverbs 19 please proverbs 19 verse number 19 proverbs 19 19 and i would say proverbs 19 19 this one that we're about to read is the verse that really helped me identify okay this friend that i do care about i mean you know i do care about him is the wrong kind of friend like he's an angry person and i should have nothing to do with them according to god's word but it's proverbs 19 19 that really helped me understand who that individual is because it says here in proverbs 19 19 a man of great wrath shall suffer punishment okay so they're going to have misery on their life they're going to have bad times on their life and you as a friend you know what you're going to be you know what you're going to feel like doing because you're a good friend you're going to want to go to that brother or sister or what have you and come alongside them and lift them out lift them up you know um and you're like because what we see here it says for if thou deliver him if you deliver him from the punishment it says yet thou must do it again it's saying this angry man never learns their lessons you help them because i'm a friend i'm going to come alongside and help you brother help your sister and you do but they fall back in their old ways again right it's like don't you learn any lessons or don't you appreciate me you know using my time and my energy you know trying to lift you up and you just get back in that same way back into problems back into contentions back into fightings and that was what i started to see is like i want to be a good friend i want to try to help these people you know support them hoping that when i'm going for a bad time they can be there to support me and that's what a friend ought to do right but they just it's like they don't appreciate what you do for them and they're back in their old ways they're back in contentions back in fighting back with punishments back with problems and then you try to come alongside and you do it again then you come alongside and you do it again come alongside and do it again you know i grew up in a place i think i told you guys where we had a lot of asian immigrants when i was when i grew up in sydney and a lot of these asian immigrants they were illegal immigrants so they would be boat people that would come from vietnam and cambodia things like this and many times the children would leave without their families without their parents or sometimes you hear stories of their parents dying in in sea okay or something like that many times they were just young people coming into the canley valley cabramatta area young people and i went to school with a lot of these people made friends and but because they didn't grow up with parents they would form gangs right they will find acceptance with other young people that are without families without moms and dads and that caused all kind of problems they'd be stealing cars and you know i mean at school i'm a friend i'm trying to be a friend i was going to just a regular you know public school trying to be a friend but you know you could see that you know these people are getting up to no good and then they eventually get caught they get thrown in jail and you'd hear things like oh man you know when they come out of jail you know they've suffered punishment right this is the time when they when they get released this is now they're going to turn it around now that they've faced the problems they've been thrown in prison they've suffered they've seen the you know the consequences of their actions surely when they walk out of prison now they're going to turn their life around you hope that's the case but then i was just looking up these these statistics this afternoon but in australia nationally you know 45 percent of prisoners that are released reoffend 45 almost half almost half of the prisoners reoffend as soon as they get out of prison it's like why because they're angry people you know and like you think you're a good friend if they'll deliver him yet they must do it again all right you not that i did this but you might pay someone's bail money get you out brother and then they're again being arrested it's like well uh you know i can't keep paying this bail money i can't keep being there for you all right they just fall in the same situation again and again and that's the kind of person you need to say hey lord you told me not to make friends make no friendship with an angry person they never learned the lesson so sad proverbs 21 please proverbs 21 proverbs 21 verse number 24 another characteristics of angry people in proverbs 21 24 it says proud and haughty scorna is his name who dealeth in proud wrath proud wrath they're angry but you can see the source of their anger is pride okay and they're known as what the haughty scorna all right look one thing that you maybe identify amongst your friends is their pride lifted up haughty right see themselves above other people and because they see themselves that way they become a scorna all right they put other people down they express their dislike toward other people and you know what you need to be careful about this i'd rather people that express dislike like not that it's great it's not it's none of these are good but i'd rather the person that is just open and says you know what i don't like that person then the people that express dislike silently you know you know it's kind of like a read between my words you know i don't you know they won't say it but you know what they're saying and if you say hey you know what you should be saying that i never said that oh but by your tone by your words you are scorning you're putting this person down you're dragging that person's name through the mud you know it's all out of pride and it's proud wrath and um it's something else i i feel that this verse number 24 i feel that this is one of the sins one of the main sins that i've seen in ifb churches amongst saved brethren okay and look i want to be very clear i believe that we ought to live righteously and wholly and be christ-like you know and and and be you know on the up and up and and and you know being more faithful to god as the years go by but i've said it so many times and i really mean this when you are improving in your christian faith give all glory to jesus all glory to jesus the reason i'm improving the reason i'm overcoming sin the reason i'm gaining knowledge is because jesus because of him i'm doing it for him as soon as the pride starts to kick in you know oh look how well i'm doing you're going to start looking at other brothers and sisters in the church and you're going to be putting them down you're going to score maybe not directly but indirectly i know i know i hear it right i've seen it it's so sad because you're doing it for the glory of man i want man to see me i want man to see my holiness and i'm doing better than brother so-and-so you know what and i want to be careful because pride is in each of is in all of us there's probably pride in me right now i know i better be careful okay but i just honestly i don't look down on on my brothers sisters in the lord you know i see a group of people that love the lord that want to come to church that want to do the right thing that want to improve in their life but they're going to grow at different stages they have different battles they're fighting their life and i've known this growing up i've known that i can't compare my life say that four years old in a christian home going to church most of my life even though it was a watered down church but still you know the habit that was all there i never i never want to be the kind of person that lifts myself up i want to be able to get along with someone that is just newly saved doesn't know how to speak the right language doesn't know how to dress properly doesn't know anything much they're just saved they know they're saved or even someone that is seeking the lord i don't want to look down on people because i've seen this in church i've seen people walk into church right maybe a man with long hair and tattooed and shabby clothes and i'm seeing my brothers and sisters in the lord at church looking down at them like oh why do they walk in it's like well let's let's try to save their soul right i mean some of you were like that some of you may have been like that but then i i hate it i hate it you know it's just when you do it for jesus then you swallow your pride what did john about to say i must decrease and he must increase okay this pride to take it down and uh you know i i just and becoming a pastor has helped me even more because as a pastor people share with me their burden sometimes their problems and i'm like oh wow i didn't know that because sometimes something might happen and i'm like i don't understand i don't think that's the right thing that my brother so and so did or that i'm just myself i'm thinking i'm not sharing that amongst people just i just think that right but then they might share their problem like wow okay now i see where you're coming from because you know like my life has generally been pretty good and you know each of us have our experience of our life and sometimes it's hard to be empathetical to what other people and their actions and their decisions and then you're all of a sudden critical oh they should have done this or they should have done that you don't really know what their history is you don't know what kind of battles they're fighting you don't know you know what struggles they're going through they may never share with you but you know it's so easy for the so i hate it amongst the ifb churches it's prideful prideful scorner like looking down on people look it's the attribute of an angry man and that's it look you'll get angry if you're trying to look for the praise of man so i just just give jesus the praise give him the glory and it'll give you great joy you know when you said jesus christ above everybody else all of a sudden we're all on equal playing field we're all trying to serve him faithfully we're all on the race we're trying to win the prize together some running faster than others and some will outpace others at different times okay but we're all aiming for the prize of the high column of jesus christ and i want to i want to encourage my brother hey keep running keep moving forward i don't burn out don't get distracted all right but we can only do it by sitting our eyes on jesus but when we set our eyes on other men how are they doing how's that family how's those people look you'll lose sight and before you know it you'll be full of pride uh proverbs 29 please proverbs 29 verse 22 proverbs 29 22 proverbs 29 22 another attribute of the angry man in proverbs 29 22 an angry man stirs up strife feel like yep we've heard that before but it says and a furious man aboundeth in transgression okay aboundeth so there's excessive transgressions there's excessive sinfulness in their life it may not you may not know that you know them as the angry man but what we see here is when you start to get them to know them further you'll find that there is excessive sin sin in their lives excessive transgressions okay this anger is just one element of all the things that they're strong with okay for excessive transgressions so look i don't i don't want to be that angry man you know if it's going to lead me to be excessively or you know abound in in transgressions i don't want that in my life i don't think you want that in your life all right we're making the efforts to be christ-like and holy come back with me to proverbs 22 proverbs 22 let's read it again here in proverbs 22 so i hope i've given you some some ideas right i'm just looking at the book of problems today just what what what can we identify with an angry man and we know what it says there right make no friendship proverbs 22 24 proverbs 22 24 make no friendship with an angry man and with a furious man thou shalt not go okay so we're being advised look be careful of the kind of friends that you make now again you say well what if i'm already a friend you know to an angry man the instruction is don't make friends but what if i really am a friend what do i do there now pastor and again i want to be careful here all right you've got a friend and they get angry they get frustrated they have a moment at just a bad time in life look don't just write them off as the angry man look if you care for friends and friendship you're not just going to avoid somebody at the at the moment of something bad going happening in their life surely like you can understand that right but some people are like that some people are like oh i got offended once and that's it i don't want to talk to them anymore oh they said they did something i don't like i'm gonna avoid them it's like you're not you're not a friend you know like if that's your attitude toward people you're a bad friend you're not a friend really at all okay people have bad times and you're gonna have bad times and when you have bad times you're gonna hope that you have good friends around you that will encourage you lift you up pray for you right be there show you love show you support but let's say you do find a person that is just um in your life a friend you've tried to maintain this friendship and they're they're horrible people they've got this pattern it's continual it's wearing you down it's causing you to get angry you're starting to feel like your soul is entrapped all right by their friendship and the feelings that they're making you feel well come with me to Proverbs 27 please Proverbs 27 verse number five Proverbs 27 verse number five now i am not in favor of just someone's doing wrong i want nothing to do with them walk away to me that just causes more problems makes things more awkward i'm not a fan of that whatsoever you know i've often taught that if you have an issue with someone a brother a sister in church a friend go to them one-on-one that's instruction that Christ has given us right try to sort it out all right so if you've got a friend that is that is angry person i want you to take this lesson here in Proverbs 27 verse number five Proverbs 27 verse number five it says open rebuke is better than secret love you've got a friend that is angry and you're like look god says not to make friends with this person you need to tell them so hey buddy look i've been by your side all these years you know i've heard you vent i've heard you get frustrated i don't see how this is benefiting our friendship i don't know what you're getting out of it but i'm not getting much out of it it's just making me feel horrible the bible says not to make friends with an angry man all right so look i need to show you and look you can still tell you can rebuke people nicely you can you can rebuke people with them knowing hey they care for me they're my friend because what it says here in verse number six faithful are the wounds of a friend but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful i want you to notice faithful are the wounds of a friend look you've got an angry friend you try to be a faithful friend and you give them some rebuke and say hey brother hey sister we can't continue as friends at this point in time blame pastor kevin if you want i heard a sermon pastor kevin this wednesday right i saw the scriptures for myself and look i just see no benefit in our friendship at this point in time look i love you care about you praying for you all right i'm not going to give you what secret love you know what to say kisses of an enemy i'm not going to be like that i'm just going to be honest and fake look and i appreciate times when my own church members have come to me and said hey pastor just concerned for you for this or that praying about you thinking about you know or hey pastor just thinking about this and and i've shared something they're like you know what well maybe this or that i appreciate it you know i do i i i really appreciate when people show me concern for whatever whatever that is and you know listen to the words of a friend that's what a faithful friend does and a faithful friend will give you open rebuke and say hey look this is an issue and look i'd love to stay friends with you but you need to sort this out you need to sort out this anger problem that you've got you got to sort you know it's fine to get angry but get angry about the things god gets angry about you're making a storm out of a teacup you know you're you're you're it's just not good for me to be around you anymore look i'm praying for you hope you can overcome this situation hope you can overcome this bad characteristic that you've got about you and it's not easy for and sometimes people say to me how do i say that to people how do i say that to people you know if i have something uncomfortable to say to them well tell them that it's uncomfortable for you to tell them all right say look hey brother look i'm not very comfortable saying this i'd rather avoid this actually but i know it's the right thing to do because i care about you i love you all right you're my friend but look you're an angry man all right if this is this is not a beneficial relationship i hope you sort this out but i've got to step away be praying for you show them the scriptures whatever it is give them that open rebuke tell them that you're praying for them show them that you do you are a friend okay and when you sort this out you know we can turn a new leaf here you know come back and we can rekindle our friendship but what i'm trying to say to you is you need to learn how to engage with people that aren't benefiting you and you're in your friendship don't avoid don't just be like that's it i don't have to do i'm not gonna talk to them i'm gonna avoid them gonna ignore them look that just causes more damage more damage and just showing yourself not to be a caring friend whatsoever faithful are the wounds of a friend give them some faithful wounds tell them the truth show them the scripture blame pastor kevin whatever you need to do okay but i'd rather you do that rather you apply these principles and step away from that friendship or never enter into that friendship to begin with because it's a snare to your soul you need to look after yourself as well sometimes we get overly concerned about everybody else but you need to really care about your soul and make sure that you're walking faithfully with the law that you're doing righteously and you need to make sure that you're doing well in your christian life and by your example you know you'll be more influential to people than being this sounding board for every complaint and every anger issue that is coming your way all right brethren the title for the sermon tonight was avoid the angry man let's pray