(Disclaimer: This transcript is auto-generated and may contain mistakes.)

Hey, guys. Welcome back to the channel. As always, we greatly appreciate you guys' support. We love seeing your comments. We love hearing feedback. It greatly helps us out. Now, I know last week was Father's Day, so don't tune me out. The title of the sermon this morning that you're about to watch is Four Formulas for Fathers. Now, again, this isn't just for fathers. I believe this is for everybody, but especially fathers. So, in this sermon, we're going to be in Proverbs 3. I'm going to give you four formulas between Proverbs 3 and Proverbs 4 that are greatly going to help you out in life. I even use a good example from my current job. The main point of this sermon is this. In life, you need to use the right formulas for the wrong situations. Of course, in this sermon, I've got three other points in addition to that. The next one is going to be, when it seems like there's no one that you can count on, you can always call upon God. Number three is going to be, don't trust your instincts because they can make you extinct. And, of course, last but not least is going to be this. Rules without relationships equals rebellion. So, stick around, watch the sermon, and find out how we unravel these to bless you and hopefully provide some value and help you guys out. And look at my Father's Day present here. Look at this. I don't know if you guys can see this here. It says, Happy Father's Day. And on the back, it says this. So, apparently, I got a child that needs a beating. Enjoy. All right. Amen. Proverbs 3. Look down at verse number one. The Bible says, My son, forget not my law, but let thine heart keep my commandments. So, you can see there Solomon writing this and passing down the baton of the law of wisdom to his son. And obviously, with today being Father's Day, and again, Happy Father's Day, that's what we're going to be talking about. We're going to be talking about some helps for fathers. Now, this is not just for fathers, so don't tune me out. This is for everyone. But obviously, it's just focused a little more towards the dads being today as Father's Day. The title of the sermon is going to be Four Formulas for Fathers. Four Formulas for Fathers. Now, you'll see why I had that turned around. So, you guys are like, what in the world is that? Looks like the pastor drew a car or something. What is this? You can see that? Okay. You guys can all kind of see this. What is it? Yeah, I don't know either. So, let's try to figure it out together, okay? I'm just kidding. So, basically, what you have here, and I know this probably just looks like chicken scratch, one, because I drew it, and two, if you're not familiar with Ohm's Law, that's what it's going to seem like to you. But these are four different math formulas that I use very frequently in my job to figure out problems, okay? So, when something goes wrong with an appliance, I have to figure out how to get it fixed. I have to figure out exactly what the problem is, okay? Now, this first one over here, don't worry and try to, you know, really understand this. This wavy line here, this just, let's just say that represents a heating element, okay? Something that heats up like in your oven or in your dryer, okay? This is called a schematic, very basic schematic. And what a schematic is, is a schematic is an engineering drawing of how a circuit or how something works. So, basically, it's the maker, okay? The maker providing us with information on how a certain appliance works, okay? And so, they're giving you facts here, like this says L1. That just basically lets me know this is 120 volts, and it just gives me a picture of how electricity flows, and then they give me another little piece of information there. It just says 60. This is just an example, okay? So, that 60 there represents resistance. And then, because I have that information, okay, because they've given me two facts about how this appliance works, I can now use this chart here, which I didn't draw it out completely because it would take forever, and you wouldn't be able to read it anyways, okay? But basically, this is a math formula that I can use to test this. So, I'll take 120 volts, divide it by 60, and that's gonna give me two amps. And so, now I can take my amp measuring tool, and I can clip it on the wire there and make sure that it's in spec, that it meets the specifications. So, if I get more, or I get less, or I don't get anything, now I know what to do, and now I know how to proceed. And they just get more and more complicated, like this one here just has two different heaters, we'll just say, and then this one over here, they're in a different configuration, okay? Now, obviously, there's a lot more than four formulas that I need to use in my job, but I think this just kinda gets the picture across hopefully, okay? Now, this one here, anybody know what that is? This is one I made up myself. This stands for formulas over patterns, okay? And the reason why I have that there is because in my job, in life, a lot of people don't take the time to learn this. In fact, most people don't. They don't take the time to actually learn how things work, to learn the math, to learn the formulas. And so, what they do instead is they say, okay, well, when this fails, we typically just change this part, okay? Now, that's cool to a certain extent. Sometimes that works. Sometimes that fits. But what happens when it doesn't? What happens when there's something else not causing that, or something else causing that problem other than what you typically change? Well, typically what happens is you go and you replace this part, which you thought was wrong, which is usually wrong, and then you look like an idiot, okay? It doesn't work. And then you're sitting there with your heart in your stomach like, uh-oh, this person just paid a lot of money, waited a week for a part, and now I'm wrong, okay? And the reason why I'm demonstrating this like this is because life is the same way. Now, you're in Proverbs chapter number three, okay? Go to John chapter number 16. We're gonna go between Proverbs three and the Gospel of John just for the first part of this sermon, and this will all make sense, okay? And so, there's nothing wrong with using patterns, okay? People display patterns of behavior, and we can typically say, okay, I think around this time here, we're gonna have an issue or whatnot, okay? But sometimes we're wrong, okay? Sometimes we are wrong. And so, what I wanna say is that in life, you have to use the right formulas. Just like in my job, I have to use the right formulas for the right appliance, for the right problems. Now, we're gonna turn this into a point, because this is four formulas for fathers, and I just wanna show you something here really quickly in John chapter number 16. Look down at verse number 33. So the Bible says this, this is Jesus speaking here, John 16 verse 33. He says, these things have I spoken unto you that in me, okay, in me, you might have peace. Now, look at the last part of the verse. In the world, look at this promise here. This is a guarantee. In the world, ye shall have tribulation, but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world, okay? Now, this here, you can look this up later if you're at all interested, you're probably not, that's okay. This here is what we call an Ohm's law pie chart. So in other words, you see this as I, E, P, and so on and so forth. So if I know any two of these things here, I can get a formula for my problem. So like over here, I told you guys, I know, well, this is 120 volts, which is your standard wall outlet voltage potential. And I know like the resistance here. I can figure out how much power this thing has. I can figure out the resistance. This should say R. I don't know why I put E there. It should say R, but you get the idea. If I know any two of those, I can find a formula, okay? Well, in life, we know that we're going to have tribulation, but we also know, okay, that Jesus has given us peace. So what does that mean? What that means is the first point for this morning, which is this, in life, you need to use the right formulas for the wrong situations. You need to use the right formulas for the wrong situations. Now, keep your place there in the Gospel of John, but go back to Proverbs chapter number three. And so for just the sake of teaching, you know, this F over P that I have on that board there, there's nothing wrong, like I said, with necessarily using patterns. They can save time. They can come in handy. Life does give us patterns, okay? But you have to understand how to use them and not to solely trust on them, okay? Because God who is our maker has given us a schematic. He's given us an outline on human behavior and it's through the King James Bible. It is in the word of God. And so that's why we're always preaching, hey, we need to go to the word of God to find out for sure what formula to apply to what situation. And we already know that we're going to be faced with tribulation. We're going to be faced with a lot of wrong situations, okay? And here's the benefit of this. Look at verse number two. So the Bible says here, for length of days and long life and peace shall they add to thee. Now what's the they there? Well, that's the law of wisdom that Solomon the father is passing down to son. And we're going to come back at the end of the sermon and take a look at that. But we know that our job as fathers, our job as parents, and really our job just as brethren is to pass on information. It's to care for other people. It's to be a giver so that we can help people out so that we can better the kingdom of God. Now go back to the Gospel of John, if you would, and go to John chapter number 14. So in life you need to use the right formulas for the wrong situations. John chapter number 14, look down at verse number 27. So Jesus says this, he says, peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you, not as the world giveth. Okay, now how does the world give? Well, the world gives on a conditional basis. So I'll give you this if you give me that. The world wants something in return. So he says, not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Because when God gives you something, he gives it to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid. Now I have to bring this up because as fathers, as men in life, you will face situations where you feel alone, where you feel discouraged, where people are attacking you. And right here, what's the formula for life? What's the most basic formula for times of trouble? Well, what does that say there? First part of the verse, peace I leave with you, okay? And we see that God gives us this peace. Jesus gives us this peace, and he doesn't give it to us like the world does. Because again, the world says, well, I will give you this peace as long as you follow my will and do my plans and do my bidding, and as long as somebody else that's not better than you doesn't come along, then we'll be okay. But we know that we have this peace from Christ, therefore we don't have to allow our hearts to be troubled. We don't have to allow our hearts to be terrified. Now go back, if you would, to Proverbs chapter number three. So you're going to find that's the main theme for this morning, that in life you need to use the right formulas for the wrong situations. And you're going to be faced with a lot of wrong situations. And as fathers, it can seem, like I said, that there's just times where you feel helpless, like where you feel hopeless. There's no one you can call on. There's no one that you can trust, but the Bible says otherwise, okay? Look at verse number five here. Proverbs chapter three, go all the way down to verse number five. This is very basic stuff here this morning, but very good. And we often need these reminders. What does it say there? It says, trust in the Lord with all thine heart. And now why does Solomon feel the need to tell us this? Why does he feel the need to pass this down to a son? Probably because, well, obviously he's filled with the Holy Ghost at this time writing these things, and this is what God wants us to understand. But because we know that in life we're going to have tribulations. We're going to be faced with a lot of wrong situations. And if we're not trusting on the Lord with all of our heart, then that means part of us is going to try to get a pattern or a solution from the world. And that is going to cause more issues. So for the second point this morning, what we're going to say is when there's no one to count on, remember there's always one you can call upon. Now go to Proverbs chapter number one. So when there's no one to count on, remember there's always one that you can call upon. And again, the need for this is very simple. It is hard for us having flesh and bone. It is hard for us to trust in something we cannot physically see with the eyes. So when we're blasted with deep tribulation and things are falling apart around us, we're being attacked, you're getting violated by your family, your friends, your neighbors, your coworkers, church members, whatever it is, it can seem like there's no hope. It can seem like you're all alone. It can seem like no one's going to come to the rescue. In fact, that's what the world will tell you. All the major big time, you know, alpha dog male influencers on the internet, what do they say? Well, as a man, ain't nobody going to help you, right? Isn't that what they say? Isn't that what Andrew Tate says? Isn't that what Jay Waller and all these other idiots say? Well, there, you know, as a man, there ain't nobody that's going to help you. You're in this thing alone. That's not true. That's a lie. That's a lie from the pits of hell. And I, it just blows my mind that people soak that stuff up and then come to a church like this on, you know, on a Sunday morning or a Sunday night or a Wednesday. It's absolutely crazy. The Bible says, trust in the Lord with all thine heart, not just part of it, with all thine heart, meaning you need to take the mastery and just accept that that's what you're going to do. And now look down here, Proverbs chapter number one and verse number 28. What you're going to see here is that this is a blessing that not everyone in the world gets, that not everyone in the world is able to take on to themselves. Verse 28. Look what it says. Then shall they call upon me? And this is obviously wisdom as it's speaking to us. Okay. And so Solomon here is trying to communicate that, guess what? There are people that reject this wisdom. There are people that just turn it away and say, you know what? I can't see that. I can't fully comprehend that. And therefore I'm going to do my own thing. I will go to the world. I will go to the patterns that work for most people and use that. And when that doesn't work, I'll go to the next influencer. I'll go to the next person until I get this figured out. Here's what the Bible says is going to happen to you. Then shall they call upon me? So when they have exhausted all of their resources, when all of their patterns that are available to the physical eyes, when they cease, when they fail, okay, then that's when people are like, uh oh, the only place left I have to go now is the wisdom from the Bible. But there can come a point to where it's too late. Then shall they call upon me? But I will not answer. They shall seek me early, but they shall not find me. Terrifying, terrifying words. Verse 29, for that they hated knowledge and did not choose the fear of the Lord. Go to Psalm chapter number 18, Psalm chapter number 18. So we see, right, that the world, what is the best that they have to offer you? Okay. And it's just patterns, things that have kind of worked, things that have kind of helped out in certain situations and people write books and people have all of these things that you can tap into. Okay. Where God who made man in his own image describes to us the fallen nature of man that was made in his own image says, Hey, I've got book after book, example after example, truth after truth here that you can go to, to find the right formulas to apply to all of the wrong situations that come into your life. Okay. And people say, you know what? I don't need that. I don't want that. I want to go on YouTube. I want to go to this person here because he's rich. And what happens? Destruction every single time, every single time. So we ought to be thankful that we're not this person here in verse 29, that we haven't hated knowledge, that we have chosen the fear of the Lord. Okay. Which is what? It's the beginning of what? Knowledge and wisdom. It's both. Look at this here. Psalm chapter 18, verse number three. I will call upon the Lord who is worthy to be praised. So shall I be saved from mine enemies. Now I'm not saying you can't go to the internet, read books by unsaved people to get information. Okay. I do it all the time. That's how I learned this. I read books all the time. I have like five books that I systematically I'm reading through right now on my desk at home. And there's nothing wrong with that. You can learn from them. Okay. However, you just have to be careful when times get tough and you got your back against the wall and it seems like the whole world is coming against you. And that's how you're going to feel as a father at some point in your life. You need to realize when it seems like there's no one to count on, there's always God that you can call upon and God doesn't make vain promises. So with that being said, let's now go back to Proverbs chapter number three. Proverbs chapter number three. So the first point, again, very simple. Okay. In life, you need to use the right formulas for the wrong situations. And we're going to be faced with a lot of wrong situations. And of course, the best way to do that is like we always say, you know, figuring out the formulas from the word of God. What is your specific problem? What exactly are you facing? Okay. Again, we, if we're ever going to figure out the solution for something that's unknown, we say this all the time. You have to move from the known to the unknown. And a lot of times we have these issues and these problems. We don't even know how to exactly articulate them or how to exactly explain them. That's what we're all here for. So that we can talk these things out and get down to the specifics and then help each other out with the word of God. Well, Hey, have you thought about this? Okay. You're having this symptom. You're having this problem and we know this. So what does this say? Okay. That's how we are supposed to approach life. So in life, you need to use the right formulas for the wrong situations. There's obviously patterns out there and things that work. I get that there's dietary patterns that work. There's dietary patterns that work better. We all understand that. Okay. But when it comes to spiritual things, we need to go to the one that created the spiritual realm in order to solve those issues. And then the second point is very, very, very, very, very, very simple. Something that we always talk about when it seems like there's no one to count on. There's always God that you can call upon. But how many times, I mean, we know that, but how many times do we actually do that? How many times are we actually just flustered and we're just sitting at home or we're just thinking in the car where, you know, when no one else is around and we're just like, man, it seems like my whole family's against me. It seems like the neighbors are against, like everybody's against me. What am I going to do? Okay. How do we get to that state? How do we get to that point to where we just automatically say, oh, duh, I need to pray. Okay. That's what we're going to talk about here next. So Proverbs chapter number three. So we're turning verse five into two points. Okay. And look at this here. So trust in the Lord with all thine heart. Now check this out. And lean not unto thine own understanding. Okay. Lean not unto thine own understanding. Now some people say, well, that, you know, in the Hebrew, that doesn't make sense. It actually means depend. Don't depend on your own understanding. Do you really need to change the word of God for that? Do you really need to go to the Hebrew to change the word of God? Can't you just open up a thesaurus and just look up lean and all the synonyms for it? I mean, that's basically all they're doing, right? We all get what this is saying here. Okay. Don't ignore trusting God and just look at life through your own lenses. Okay. Because that is detrimental. That is not healthy. That is not good. And the Christian will never get away with that. Okay. So what does that mean? That means the third formula is this. Your instincts, okay, apart from God, your instincts can make you extinct. Your instincts can make you extinct. So you go through life just saying, you know what? That's cool. Bible. I got sermons. I got this, but I'm not going to really do a deep dive. I'm not really going to sit down and try to learn the formulas, the things that are proven and apply them to my life. What is going to happen? You're going to get destroyed. You're going to prolong your issues. You're going to prolong your problems. So what Solomon is saying here is don't just trust your instincts. Now, yes, God did give us the unction. He did give us our gut feelings. Okay. But they always need to be fact checked with the word of God. Okay. They always need to be fact checked in the multitude of counselors. So we see here that there is a danger in depending solely on our own understanding or own instincts. And what does that produce? What that produces is a person that does this. And let me, you know, you don't have to raise your hand. I already know the answer. Okay. Who knows somebody here that is just very frequent, you know, a problem comes up and they go from emotion directly to action. Okay. We all know people like that. We've all been that person. We've all done that. Haven't we? So what's the, uh, what's the opposite way? What are the ways that, how do we stop doing that? Okay. Well, we need to become people that move from information to reformation. Okay. That's the key. When you are the type of person that says, hold on, I need to gather information. I hear this. I hear somebody says this and it seems likely, it seems like that might be the case. Okay. The kids are punching each other in the face over here and it's usually kindling and it starts, you know, it's like, okay, hold on, hold on here. Okay. Before I make an emotional reaction, before I just charge off and just start beating these kids. Okay. I need to figure some things out. I need to stop what I'm doing and gather information so that I can reform the situation. Obviously that's kind of just a goofy little thing in our family, but you get the point. Okay. Don't lean on your own, your own understanding, but level your own understanding. And that is only done through submitting to the word of God. In fact, the next verse tells you exactly how to do this. It's too easy. Look at verse six in all thy ways. Look at that language there. Okay. We're supposed to trust in the Lord with all of our hearts, with all thine heart, not just part of it. And so what's the solution here? Verse six in all thy ways, acknowledge him. So whatever it is that you're doing, whatever goals that you have, whatever decisions that you need to make, whatever problems that you have, if you could just simply acknowledge him, why do you think the Bible says pray without ceasing? Okay. That ties right into this here. We're supposed to always be praying, but the problem is you get the super hyper religious type Christian people or just people in the world today. And they say, well, a prayer, you know, you have to actually go into the physical closet and kneel because that gives you more power. And you got to repent of your sins first. And they attach all of these crazy things onto prayer to make it difficult. Gee, I wonder who thought of that and make it confusing. Gee, I wonder who's the author of that. Okay. And so we tend not to do it. Okay. But we're allowed access to God because the Bible says that we're Kings and priests. We have the ability to now acknowledge God and people have always had this because this is Old Testament. Okay. But the point is that anything that you decide to do or any problem that you think you might have, or that you do have, we need to acknowledge God in all of our ways. Bring him into it because he wants to be into those problems. And what is going to happen? He shall direct our paths. Okay. This is biblical math here. If this, then this happens. If we acknowledge God in everything that we think or do, then guess what's going to automatically happen. It will happen. He will direct our paths. But the problem is, okay, the way that he directs us may not be the way that we want to be directed. And so you have this problem. Well, my flesh really wants to go this way, but God seems to be moving me this way. And so what happens? We get into our own heads and we start overthinking things and we start over rationalizing things. And the next thing you know, we're over here in enemy territory and we're not trusting in the Lord with all of our heart. We're not acknowledging him with all of our ways anymore. We're going back to those patterns that we think we've seen work. You know, the big danger with this is that you can, you can understand something or so you think and still be wrong. There are times like when I'm working on a machine and I'm like, I've seen this a thousand times. I'm in a hurry. I know what the problem is. Okay. And I know what the math is. I know all this stuff and I'll change something. And then it works for a second and shuts down. I'm like, dang it! If I would have just, if I would have just done one of these formulas, even though I was in a hurry, even though I do it every single day, you know what? I would have caught on to the problem much, much sooner. And so the solution here, okay, remember point number three, your instincts can make you extinct. So what we need to do is move from information to reformation, right? We don't want to lean on our own understanding. We want to level our own understanding. We do that by verse six, in all thy ways acknowledge him and he shall, guaranteed, promise, direct thy paths. Look at verse seven, be not wise in thine own eyes, fear the Lord and depart from evil. Why does he say that? Why does it say fear the Lord and depart from evil? Because if we're not acknowledging him in all of our ways, if we're not keeping him in all of our thoughts, okay, and we're just starting to lean on our own understanding because that's what the world does. And that's what the patterns are. Then guess what? Guess what? That's evil. That's hurtful. That's evil. That's not good. That's the opposite of righteous. Okay. It's evil. Look at it again. Be not wise in thine own eyes. So in other words, lean not on thine own understanding, okay, fear the Lord and depart from evil. So when we're not fearing the Lord, okay, and we're like, he is not going to help me in this. I know I'm getting chased and God's going to destroy me. Guess what? This guy right here, I've been there. And recently, okay, this happened. So I know if it happens to me, it's happening to you. It's happening to all of us. And you say, oh, it's never happened to me. It will. Trust me, pal, it will happen to you. Okay. And the solution is to probably memorize these verses so that they come up, they start to bubble up in your head, okay, so that when you get to this point in life, you're going to be able to overcome it because the devil would love nothing more than to get every single one of you to not only hate each other, but to get you out of church and to get you out from knocking those doors that are out there and providing the community with truth. Look at verse eight. It shall be health to thy navel and marrow to thy bones. Some people say that's just metaphor. If you're not drinking raw milk and taking your vitamins, you're not going to be, look, I get all that stuff's important. I do that stuff too. Whatever. It's all good. Okay. I have a feeling, and this is my opinion. I have a feeling that following this wisdom is actually more beneficial for your health than a lot of other things that are out there. Oh, but what about the infrared lights? And you got to go into this, you know, chill dude. Okay. Just take a break, man. Let's start with what we know. Okay. This doesn't sound like metaphorical language to me. Okay. It shall be. That's obligatory. That is command. Okay. That is a guarantee. Okay. It shall be health to thy navel. Okay. So to your gut, you want to improve your gut health. You know what? Not holding onto grudges and being bitter all the time. Guess what? That's going to improve your gut health. Now, I'm not saying you don't need bovine, colostrum, and all these other things that are popular. Do all that stuff. Okay. That's cool. But don't neglect the thing that the maker has provided you. That the maker, the designer has already given you as factual. Okay. Shall be health to thy navel and marrow to thy bones. So don't go run down to your local gym and start taking Anavar and human growth hormone to grow your bones. No. Okay. Follow this wisdom. That's going to provide you with peace, which is going to in turn help out your health. Now I'm not saying that if you got, oh, pastor's saying, if you got stage four cancer and you just go around calling people and forgiving them, you're going to be healed. I'm not saying that at all. I'm saying you can probably prevent a lot of that just by adopting these things right here, right now. Why do you think it is that guys typically tap out in life? Okay. Go to the grave before women. It's because we're more prone to anger. We're more prone to want to control things right now. You know, that's true. Okay. As a guy, I love solving problems, which is why I love being a pastor, which is why I love this job. And I don't want to give it up until God tells me you're done. Okay. I love doing that. But there's a cost associated with that. There are, there, there, there's conflict involved in that. There are situations that you can get into where you've tried all the formulas and still something is wrong and you can't see it. Okay. That's when it's time to go back to the drawing board, go back in audit, go back and make sure that you're good to go. Go to Proverbs chapter number four. So again, your instincts can make you extinct. And I mean, what I mean by that is if you're trusting in your own understanding, trusting in yourself versus God, we already know that is going to somehow destroy you. Okay. I mean, who's the perfect example of this? Well, Abraham, Abraham, Sarah, God promised, Hey, you're going to have a son and have a child later on in life. And so of course, Abraham and Sarah was just, well, how's this going to work? How's God going to do this? Sarah's like, Hmm, Hagar. She's younger. She can still bear children. I'll just give you, I'll give her, I'll give you Hagar. And then you guys can go ahead and, you know, and they have, I mean, it's just, it's just, it's crazy. Now God still blessed Abraham in that situation, but what happened? What did Abraham do? How did they fail in that situation? They trust, they leaned on their own understanding. Okay. Instead of having patience and waiting for God to do exactly what he said he would do. He didn't say that Hagar is going to have a child. He said, no, you and your wife will have a child later on in life. He promised them that, but they leaned onto their own understanding, made a mistake and had that. And obviously God turned that into a blessing. God used that to fulfill prophecy and, you know, help make many nations out of Abraham. We get that. We understand that. But the point is Abraham's in the Bible. Abraham is a great figure in the Bible. And if he at that stage in his life can lean into his own understanding, you better believe that every single person in here, every single person that you know, I don't care how super new IFB they are. Okay. They're going to fall into that trap. And that's why these things are written the way that they are. So let's move on here now to the last formula. Proverbs chapter number four, look down at verse number one. Hear ye children, the instruction of a father and attend to no understanding. So again, here, okay. Father passing down the baton information to family information to children. Why? For the sole purpose of serving God for health, for optimum living. Verse two, for I give you good doctrine forsake ye not my law. The Bible says that doctrine distills. It cleanses as the morning dew. Okay. It says that in Deuteronomy that doctrine is a cleanser. Okay. Doctrine is where we get our formulas to discern what is wrong with our world. What is wrong with what people say, what is wrong with so-called religion today. Verse three, for I was my father's son, tender and only beloved in the sight of my mother. Now look at verse number four. He taught me also and said unto me, let thine heart retain my words, keep my commandments and live. We're going to talk about these first four verses here for a second. So again, just a really quick review. I just want to make sure that we all got these formulas. Okay. In life you need to use the right formulas for the wrong situations. Okay. And we said number two, when there's no one to count on, when it seems like there's nobody that you can count on, there's always God that you can call upon. And number three, your instincts can make you extinct. Now for the fourth and final one, this is very, very important. Not just for dads, but also for every single one. Okay. Notice what Solomon says here in verse four. He taught me also. Okay. Well, you know that Bathsheba, as far as I know, only gave birth to Solomon. And he's saying he taught me also. So Solomon saying, Hey, my father taught me this. Now look at this word here in verse number three. So verse four, we've got this concept. Okay. He taught me, which takes what? Takes time. You ever try to teach a child something? It takes time and it takes patience. And then it takes more time, and then it takes more patience. And then it takes more time and a whole lot more patience. Okay. Good verse number three. For I was my father's son. Look at this. Tender. You see that word there? Tender. Was he talking about steak? Chicken breast? What's he talking about there? Tender. Okay. What does that mean? And only beloved in the sight of my mother. Okay. That word tender there is describing, it's giving us this emotional connection that he remembers. Okay. He remembers being the son of his father. He remembers being tender and beloved in the sight of his mother. So what are you going with this? What does this mean? This is probably the most important one of the morning. Okay. And I don't ever want you to forget this. Rules without relationships equals rebellion. Let me say that again. Rules without relationships equals rebellion. Who in here has ever had a boss that just loved being the boss? They just love being in charge. Anybody here go through that? Or is it just me because I was in the military and worked for the government? Okay. If not, I'm guessing at some point you probably will. But there are many people in the world that were picked on in high school, that were picked on in elementary school, picked on in college, and they all of a sudden wind up in a position of power and they decide they're going to take it out on everybody. And they love being the guy in charge. They love having that power. And they love telling you what to do. And I want you to be honest with me right now. You hate their guts, don't you? You want to smash them. Don't say, oh, I'm crazy. I don't know. Be not a strike. Yeah. Whatever. You know you want to smash that person. You want to take that person out. No, I don't. I'm super spiritual. No, you're not. No, no, you're not. Oh, don't. Don't even start that. You know that that's annoying. And then that is toxic. And your only thought is how can we get rid of this guy or how can I remove myself from the situation? Okay? I've seen this so many times in my life. And you know what the bad thing is? When you're working in the military, you ain't getting out. You can't get away from these people. They own you. They own you. And the military is filled with people that just love getting that extra stripe, love getting that power. You know what? There's a lot of guys in the world like that too. You know that, dads? There's a lot of guys in the world. There's a lot of guys out there that just want to get a girl to boss them around and tell them you're going to do this and you're going to do this and you're going to do this. What do we do about that? Tell our girls. We spend time with our girls. We spend time with our kids and let them know that rules without relationships equals rebellion. When I left the military, okay, I couldn't hold a civilian job. I actually had to go back. This is something I haven't told people. I don't know if I've told anybody this, okay? When I left the military, when I left my job in the infantry, I actually got a civilian job and I could not get along with people because I said the first person that mouths off at me is going to get it and they're going to get it good. And you know what? It feels good, man. It feels real good to blast somebody. It feels real good to slam someone up against the wall when they talk to you and realize you're not sending me to the brig. You're not sending me to military jail. You're not going to call the military cops. Oh, they call the civilian cops, but that's a different story, okay? But it's different, you know, and it feels good. But what does that do? Well, that you lean on your own understanding and it causes a bunch of other issues. And so what I'm saying is these people can leave a mark on you, okay? They've left a mark on me before and it's still in me. When people start raising their voice to me, like I'm telling you, I'm a pastor and I there's no like slow boil. Like I'm scarred. Like my tank is like this. So when people are like, is that really what's wrong? Is that really what's broken? I'm just like, I'm not going to tell you. You know, I have to really step back and like really try to remove myself because it's just a thing. I, you know, it, that's what it does. Okay. That is what it does to people. And so in our families, when we just throw out a bunch of rules, dads, and we're just like, you know what, guess what wife, you're going to do this, this and this because I am who I am because I'm in charge, dog. I'm the top dog. I'm the leader. And that's why you're going to do this. Okay. And we just act like this. You do this. You're going to do this. And you just constantly, because you're in charge, just barfing out rules and you're neglecting the relationship. You're neglecting that time and that patience to cultivate that relationship. You are creating a toxic environment that will produce rebellious people. That is what you're doing. So I don't believe you prove it. How many of David's kids turned out real good? How's Absalom doing? Who was it that tried to slide in to the throne before Solomon? Okay. Think about it. Okay. What would have happened if David was able, and obviously David's better than me. Okay. I'm just saying these things are written for our admonition. These things are written so that we can learn. What would have happened if David would have just spent more time and patience with Absalom, with all of his other kids? Okay. Not swept things under the rug. Like what happened with his daughter? What happened with Tamar? I mean, I mean, think about this. Okay. What about Samuel? Samuel was a great man of God, a great judge in Israel. What did God tell him towards the end? He was like, Samuel, you know, your kids aren't following my laws. You know, your kids aren't, aren't, aren't taking over. So we're going to go to the King's route, right? Where do you think that came from? Where was Samuel raised? In the temple. Who was in charge of the temple? Eli. How did Eli's sons turn out? You know, Hophni and Phinehas. How did they turn out? They were reprobates. Okay. Why? I'm just, I'm just saying these patterns are in the Bible for a reason. Go to Acts chapter 21. Rules without relationships equals rebellion. Okay. And so what I believe that Solomon is saying here, the reason why that it's written the way that it is, where he says in verse four, you know, my father taught me. Verse three, tender and beloved was I in the sight of my mother. Okay. Is because he's recalling that connection. Okay. When we establish this connection with our children, that is how we bring hope. That is how we bring healing. And that is how we properly provide instruction. Okay. If you don't want your children, if you don't want your followers, managers, bosses, if you don't want them to rebel, okay, then you need to be humble. You need to be able to tell them, Hey, this rule is in place because it prevents all of these other bad things from happening. And here's some examples of that. Okay. That is how we cultivate the right environment in church, in family. That is what God does to us. You know, a lot of people, how does the worldview God always just this dictator in the sky that wants you to do all of these things. I had somebody recently say, you know what, if I have to become a Christian, I'm gonna have to give up this, this, and this. And they're all stupid things. I'm gonna have to give up fishing. I'm gonna have to give up going to the races. I'm gonna have to give up the D Derby. I'm just like, where's that in the Bible? You know what I mean? But that's how people view God because that's how people have treated them in their lives and it scarred them. It has just completely blasted them. Hey, we're almost done. Okay. But I want to show you this here because I thought this definitely applies. Acts chapter number 21. Look down at verse number eight and we're going to just read two verses about a guy named Philip. Okay. Who went from deacon to now being described as an evangelist. Look at verse eight. It says Acts 21 verse eight. And the next day we that were of Paul's company departed. So obviously Luke given you the narrative here and came onto Caesarea and we entered into the house of Philip, the evangelist. What does an evangelist do? Evangelizes. He preaches the gospel. He preaches the word, which was one of the seven. Hey, you'd go back in time here and your Bibles and look at that story about the deacons, but we don't have time. Okay. And abode with him. So what do we see about Philip right off the bat? He's hospitable. He takes these guys in. We see that he's an evangelist. That's what we know. Look at verse nine. And the same man had four daughters, virgins. Why do you think that's in there? Why do we need to know that? Right. Okay. Which did prophesy. Now they, he's not saying that they stood up on a pulpit and gave sermons, but this evangelist who had four daughters and all four of them were told they're virgins, meaning they're pure, did preach the word of God. They followed daddy's example. How does that happen? It goes without saying it happens because Philip understood something. He understood that rules without a relationship equals rebellion. And he said, that's not how this is going to be. I'm going to take the time necessary to instruct my daughters on how to live life and on how to give life. That's what he did. And because of that, he was a successful father. We don't know a lot about Philip, but we know that everything written about him was good to go. Now, obviously he's a man, obviously he had the same, you know, trials and tribulations and things that we all face. I get that. I understand that. But here we got a clear example of someone who did it right. Someone who did it good. And I'm telling you, it was because he knew it took time. It takes time to teach someone how to go soul and it doesn't. Everybody in here knows this. It takes time to make a soul winner. It takes more time to make a good soul winner. It takes patience. It takes tenderness. It takes care. It takes a lot of intestinal fortitude. That's what it takes. Okay. It takes a lot of us not being up here. I'm the senior evangelist and you're going to do this because that's how we do it. It's not how we operate. That's not the best way to do business. In fact, what that does is create rebellion because nobody wants to do things when they're barked at. Hey, go sweep that over there. Nobody likes to be talked to like that. Right? But there's the world's filled with people that do that. The world's filled with bosses that do that. The world's filled with dads that do that. And that's wrong. And that always causes issues. So again, rules without relationships equals rebellion. So we're done right here. I just want to review these real quick. Look, in life, you need to have the right formulas for all the wrong situations. That's how we ought to be. It's okay to use patterns, but put patterns on the bottom. Formulas first, patterns second. Okay. You say, well, how come? Well, because we know that our instincts can make us extinct. Right? We need to go from information to reformation. We don't want to be the type of person that is just emotional going right to actions. Okay. So instead of what? Leading on our own understanding, we level our own understanding. We do that by the word of God. And of course, the obvious is what? When you're backed into a corner. Okay. When we're backed into the corner and it seems like there's no help. If we're already acknowledging God in all our ways, we know that when it seems like there's no one to count on, there is always one that we can call upon. We know that that's God. And then finally, last but not least, okay, rules without relationships equals rebellion. This is not just true in family, but it's also true in the workforce. It's true in life. It's true when you're trying to build friendships. Okay. And you know, you just start, well, this is what we do. And you know, oh, you wear pants. Well, you're wrong and you suck and you're not fundamental like me. Okay. That doesn't help anybody. But when you've got that tender mercy and that compassion and that empathy, and you want to help teach somebody truth. Okay. That's how you're going to be able to do it. You're going to be able to take the time. Hey, here's why I do this. Here's what the Bible says. Okay. Here's the formula. Here's the situation. Here's what can go wrong if we don't do this. So this is why we do this. Okay. That is how we should operate in life. So hopefully this helps. Let's stop right there. Bow our heads and have a word of prayer. Thank you again so much, Lord, for this church and for everything that you do for us. We just pray you bless us all today, Lord. And bless the soul winning, the fellowship, everything we have going on today. Bring us back again safely tonight. In Jesus name, I pray. Amen. All right. One more song and then we'll be dismissed.