(Disclaimer: This transcript is auto-generated and may contain mistakes.)

🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 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🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 Hey man, we want to welcome you to Verity Baptist Church this morning. We're so glad you're with us. We have a wonderful service, of course, lined up for you today. We'd love to begin the service with a word of prayer. Let's go ahead and bow our heads and pray together. Father Lord we do thank you for allowing us to gather together this morning Lord we pray that you'd bless the service the singing the preaching what we pray that you'd bless everything that's done today that would bring honor and glory to your name in Jesus name we pray amen turn the song 206 206 206 on the first there is a song in my heart today, something I never had. Jesus has taken my sins away. Oh say but I'm glad, oh say but I'm glad, oh say but I'm glad. Jesus is never like a children. Oh say but I'm glad, wonderful, marvelous love he brings. Into a heart that's sad, through darkest tunnels the soul just sings. Oh say but I'm glad, oh say but I'm glad, oh say but I'm glad. Jesus has come and my cuts overwhelmed, oh say but I'm glad. We have a fellowship rich and sweet, tongues can never be laid. Now biding in him the souls retreat, oh say but I'm glad, oh say but I'm glad, oh say but I'm glad. Jesus has come and my cuts overwhelmed, oh say but I'm glad. Good, on the last. Won't you come to him with all your care, weary and bored and sad. You two will sing as his love you share, oh say but I'm glad, oh say but I'm glad, oh say but I'm glad. Jesus has come and my cuts overwhelmed, oh say but I'm glad, good singing. Ephesians 2 10 for we are his workmanship created in Christ Jesus unto good works which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them. And that's a good verse there. We like that. If you open up your bulletin you'll see our service time Sunday morning service 10 30 a.m. We of course are glad that you're with us on Sunday morning on the Lord's Day for church. We do invite you to be back tonight at 6 p.m. And the evening service at 6 p.m. is different than the morning service, different songs that are sung, different sermon that's preached. We would love for you to join us for the midweek service. We call it the most encouraging service of the week and we'd love for you to be a part of that service as well. If you look at our soul winning times, of course our main soul winning time is on Saturday mornings at 10 a.m. Soul winning is when we go out in the community, we knock doors, we invite people to church and we preach the gospel to anyone who's interested. We have additional soul winning times on Thursdays, Fridays and Sundays at 2 p.m. So we're glad that you're with us on Sunday morning. We're glad that you're with us on Sunday morning. We have additional soul winning times on Thursdays, Fridays and Sundays at 2 p.m. So we're glad that you're with us on Sunday morning. We have additional soul winning times on Thursdays, Fridays and Sundays at 2 p.m. So we're glad that you're with us on Sunday morning. We have additional soul winning times on Thursdays, Fridays and Sundays at 2 p.m. So we're glad that you're with us on Sunday morning. We have additional soul winning times on Thursdays, Fridays and Sundays at 2 p.m. So we're glad that you're with us on Sunday morning. We have additional soul winning times on Thursdays, Fridays and Sundays at 2 p.m. So we're glad that you're with us on Sunday morning. We have additional soul winning times on Thursdays, Fridays and Sundays at 2 p.m. So we're glad that you're with us on Sunday morning. We have additional soul winning times on Thursdays, Fridays and Sundays at 2 p.m. So we're glad that you're with us on Sunday morning. We're glad that you're with us on Thursdays, Fridays and Sundays at 2 p.m. So we're glad that you're with us on Thursdays, Fridays and Sundays at 2 p.m. So if you have a child that's been distracting during the service or if you need some privacy, we would encourage you to use those rooms as needed. All of the mother baby rooms and daddy rooms have comfortable seating. They've got monitors set up so you can watch the service and listen to it. If you're not sure where those rooms are at, you can look at the back of the bulletin and you'll see a layout of our church building. It'll show you where the mother baby rooms are, where the daddy room is. It'll show you where the restrooms are as well. If you need to be baptized, please let us know and you can let us know on your communication card. There's a place for you to check off that you'd like information about baptism. We'll follow up with you in regards to that. If you look at the announcements and upcoming events, of course we've got our three different series that we are in on Sunday morning, Sunday night, Wednesday night. And we are in a series on Sunday mornings called Helping People Reach Their Full Potential. We're going to continue that, of course, this morning. On Sunday nights, we are in a study in the book of Numbers, Wilderness, Wanderings. We're actually going to take a break from that tonight. We're going to be preaching a special sermon tonight, but we encourage you to, of course, be here for that as well. And on Wednesday nights, we've got the book of Galatians. And then we've got several things going on for the ladies. So we want to invite all the ladies to come out to an elegant afternoon tea in honor of Mother's Day. That's Saturday, May 13th at 3 p.m. And you can sign up on your communication card. It is a very nice event. All the ladies that go every year, they always have a great time. There's a gift basket that's going to be valued at over $50 and you can sign up through your communication card. It's the honor of Mother's Day, but you don't have to be a mother to come. It's for all ladies, all ages. So we'd love for you to be a part of that. If you'd like to volunteer to help with the ladies' tea, we've got some sign-up sheets in the foyer. If you go out to our main foyer, you'll see a table set up and several clipboards. And maybe you can go by there and find somewhere where you could serve and help. We'd appreciate your help with that. And then, of course, the next day on Sunday, May 14th is Mother's Day. And we'd love for you to make plans to be with us on Mother's Day. And the children's choir will be singing on Mother's Day in honor of Mother's Day. And we'll have a T-shirt, a ladies' verity Baptist Church T-shirt for all the ladies and girls in attendance on Mother's Day. Everyone will get a T-shirt as a gift from the church. And then, of course, we've got choir stuff going on. The choir recordings are continuing tonight, 10 minutes after the evening service in the Fellowship Hall. If you're a part of the choir, we'd love for you to be a part of that and help us with the choir recordings, of course. The children's choir is practicing at 515 in the playroom. It is open to ages 4 to 12. And they're, of course, practicing for Mother's Day. There's other things there for you to look at. Please don't forget to turn your cell phones off or place them on silent during the service so that they're not a distraction to anybody. If you look at the back of the bulletin, birthdays and anniversaries for the month of May. This week we have Ms. Edith Gustelum's birthday on May 1st. Ms. April Deacon's birthday on May 3rd. Brother Johnny Cervantes has a birthday on May 3rd. Brother Graham Scott has a birthday on May 3rd as well. And Brother Fred and Ms. Connie Ramirez have an anniversary on May 3rd. Praise Report, Money Matters, all those things are there for you to look at. And I think that's it for all of the announcements. So we're going to go ahead and sing the chorus of the week, which is the insert in your bulletin. And we're going to sing and rejoice in the Lord as we prepare to receive the offering this morning. This song was written by a man named Ron Hamilton. He passed away just, I think, last week. And he was a good man. He wrote a very beautiful song here. We'll go ahead and sing it out together on the first. Rejoice in the Lord. Sing it out on the first. A man comes with a purpose or plan, When trying a servant and molding a man. Give thanks to the Lord. Sing, sing, song. In darkness give a song. Rejoice in the Lord. He makes no mistake. And now is the end of each plan. But I pray for when I am dry and purified, I shall come forth as a whole. Sing it out on the second. I could not see through the shadows I had. So I look down on such a figure instead. I'm bound to the will of the Master that day. Rejoice in the Lord. He makes no mistake. And now is the end of each plan. But I pray for when I am dry and purified, I shall come forth as a whole. You're saying well this morning. Sing it out on the third. Now I can see. God strengthens His children and purges Him blood. My Father knows best and I trust in His care. Rejoice in the Lord. He makes no mistake. And now is the end of each plan. But I pray for when I am dry and purified, I shall come forth as a whole. Amen. Good seeing one of the guys. Come up and help us with the offering at this time. And let's go ahead and bow our heads and have a word of prayer. Heavenly Father, Lord, we do love You. We thank You for allowing us to gather together on a sunny morning. Lord, we pray that You bless the offering, the gift and the giver. We ask that You'd meet with us as we open up Your Word and study from the Word of God. Lord, I pray that You'd help us to learn, help us to be able to draw close to You. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. Amen. Amen. Amen. Amen. Amen. Turn your Bibles to Genesis chapter 2. Genesis chapter 2. If you do not have a Bible, raise your hand and I shall bring you one. Genesis chapter 2. We will read the entire chapter as our custom. Genesis chapter 2. Just keep your hands up and I shall bring you a Bible. Genesis chapter 2, the Bible reads, Thus the heavens and the earth were finished, and all the host of them. And on the seventh day God ended His work which He had made, and He rested on the seventh day from all the work which He had made. And God blessed the seventh day and sanctified it, because that in it He had rested from all His work which God created and made. These are the generations of the heavens of the earth when they were created, in the day that the Lord God made the earth and the heavens, and every plant of the field before it was in the earth, and every herb of the field before it grew. For the Lord God had not caused it to rain upon the earth, and there was not a man to till the ground. But there went up a mist from the earth, and watered the whole face of the ground. And the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and man became a living soul. And the Lord God planted a garden eastward in Eden, and there He put the man whom He had formed. And out of the ground made the Lord God to grow every tree that is pleasant to the sight and good for food, the tree of life also in the midst of the garden, and the tree of knowledge of good and evil. And a river went out of Eden to water the garden, and from thence it was parted, and became into four heads. The name of the first is Pison, that is which compasseth the whole land of Havilah, where there is gold. And the gold of that land is good, there is Delium and the onyx stone. And the name of the second river is Gihon, the same as that that compasseth the whole land of Ethiopia. And the name of the third river is Hedekul, that is it which goeth toward the east of Assyria. And the fourth river is Euphrates. And the Lord God took the man, and put him in the garden of Eden to dress it and to keep it. And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat, but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it. For in the day that thou eatest thereof, thou shalt surely die. And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone, I will make him an help, meet for him. And out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air, and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them. And whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found an help, meet for him. And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept. And he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof. And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from the man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh. She shall be called woman, because she was taken out of man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife, and they shall be one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed. Let's pray. Lord God Almighty, thank you for this day. Thank you for this opportunity to come together. Please bless, Pastor. Bless the message. Let it bring glory and honor to you. In the name of Jesus Christ, I pray. Amen. Amen. All right, we're there in Genesis chapter number 2. And of course this morning we are continuing a series we started several weeks ago called Helping People Reach Their Full Potential. And if you remember, this is now the third week in this sermon series. If you remember, we started this series a couple of weeks ago. And we're learning about reaching our full potential in different areas of life. I began with the first sermon in this series. I began with a sermon entitled Untapped Potential. And we learned from the Word of God that we all have potential that can be developed. None of us have attained or arrived. And we all should be willing and ready to develop the potential that God has given us. In part 2 of the sermon series, which was last week, I preached a sermon called How to Reach Your Own Personal Potential. In that sermon, I spoke to every individual as an individual. And I gave you 12 different thoughts regarding how you and I can reach our own potential. This morning I'm beginning a section in this series in which we will begin to become more topical and maybe more pointed. This morning I'm preaching a sermon entitled How to Help Your Husband Reach His Full Potential. How to Help Your Husband Reach His Full Potential. Obviously this sermon is geared towards ladies and specifically wives. And let me go ahead and just say this, because whenever I preach sermons like this I've always got to give a few disclaimers. Before some of you leave here this morning and walk out the doors calling me a male chauvinist or misogynistic, I want you to be aware of the fact that next week I'll be preaching a sermon entitled How to Help Your Wife Reach Her Potential. And it'll be a sermon directed at the men. In that sermon I'm sure there'll be some men who will accuse me of being a feminist. I'm sure of it. So I will just say to you what I think should be something that every pastor should say to his people from time to time, and it is this. I don't care what you think. I'm going to preach the Word of God to you, and it can help you if you would listen. Now let me say this. I've been announcing this for several weeks now. For several weeks I've been telling you I'm going to be preaching a sermon about how to help your husband reach his potential, how to help your wife reach her potential, how to help your children reach their potential. I've been announcing this for several weeks now. Some of you will still think that I'm preaching against you, and that's because you don't listen. But allow me to calm your fears, and allow me to reassure you that if you feel like I am preaching against you this morning, it is because I am. So I would encourage you to just listen and learn and apply and have a good marriage. I thought that was the whole point of going to church, is to learn the Bible and to get some preaching that will help you. Now if you're here this morning and you're a young lady and you're not married, please don't tune out. This is the perfect time for you to learn these lessons. Some of the ladies I'll be speaking to this morning are hardened warriors in their marriage, and I do not say that in a complimentary way. And they're not going to maybe listen to what I have to say. But you are not there, and you maybe have a chance to still have a good marriage. If you're a man here this morning, don't just tune out, because these are things that you probably should need to be aware of as well. One last offensive point as an introductory statement before I get into this very encouraging sermon, and it is this. I need the ladies in the mother-baby rooms to stop talking. I need the ladies to listen, all right? I'm talking to the ladies in the mother-baby room, stop talking. Right now in the mother-baby room, there are ladies in the middle of a Monopoly game who are thinking, I think he's talking to us, and I am. I'm asking you to close your mouths and listen and quit talking so much. You say, how do we know we talk so much in the mother-baby room? We can hear you. So stop talking, shut your mouth, please, and listen for a change, because this sermon may change your life. In Genesis chapter 2 and verse 18, we see these verses. I'd like you to see them there. The Bible says, and the Lord God said, it is not good that a man should be alone. I will make him and help meet for him. I want to begin by just highlighting for you the power of a wife. The Bible says that God, when he created man, he looked down at this lonely man, this alone man, and he said it's not good for a man that he should be alone. And he said, I will make him and help meet for him. I want you to notice that the word meet means suitable or acceptable or fitting. And God said, I'm going to make him a help. I'm going to make him somebody to help him, but I'm going to make him someone that is suitable or proper or fitting for him. Of course, in verse 19, the Bible says, and out of the ground, the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every fowl of the air and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them. And whatsoever Adam called the living creatures, that was the name thereof. And Adam gave names to all cattle and to the fowl of the air and to every beast of the field. But for Adam, there was not found a help meet for him. There was not found a help suitable for him. And I'm sorry to break it to you, but Dog is not man's best friend. And that was not a help meet that was suitable for Adam. Verse 21, and the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam. And he slept and he took one of his ribs and closed up his flesh and said thereof, and the rib which the Lord God had taken from man made he a woman and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, this is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh. She shall be called woman because she was taken out of man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and mother and shall cleave unto his wife and they shall be one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed. I want you to understand that the Bible says that the wife was created, the position of a wife was created to be a help meet to her husband. And the wife has the power to bring out, and I honestly believe this, and I'll be preaching a sermon to the men next week, but I honestly believe that the wife has the power to bring out the best in her husband and to help him reach his full potential. God looked down at Adam and he looked at Adam and he said this will not do. This is not good enough. He's going to need some help. He's going to need somebody to bring out the best in him. He's going to need somebody to help him reach his potential. So God said I'll make a woman that will be his help meet. And if you're here this morning and you are a wife, I want you to understand that you have the power to bring out the best in your husband and to help him reach his full potential. Something that I did in preparation for this sermon, let me just go ahead and say this as well. I asked my wife, I'm going to give you six statements this morning, six statements regarding how a wife can help her husband reach his potential. I asked my wife to help me with this sermon. It's not something I usually do, but in some cases like this I'll ask for her help. And she gave me her thoughts and input on each one of these points, every single one of these statements that I'm going to give you this morning. I talked to her about them and got her thoughts and her input, mainly because I wanted to have a lady's perspective and also because I wanted to make sure that I did, to the best of my ability, communicate this in such a way that would maybe connect with women. I obviously am not a woman. I am a man and sometimes maybe I speak in that way and I want to be able to speak in such a way that maybe would connect with the ladies. I do say that to say this. Do not leave here this morning, ladies, dismissing the sermon as the ramblings of some stupid man. This has been ran through a very successful woman who has given her approval and saying, yes, these are the things that need to be said. Now, with that said, let me say this. One thing that my wife brought up to me as we were talking about this is that it's interesting as you look at and as you maybe research and look at the resources and books that are created out there for marriages, you'll find that a vast majority of literature is written. There's a lot more literature written for the wife than there is the husband. Part of that has to do with the fact that men are just not that great at reading, but part of that has to do with the fact that I do believe and I think most people who write in this category understand that the wife is the key. The wife is the key to bringing out the best in her husband, and you wives have a power. Let me just say this, and I'll cover this in a different sermon in a different week, really towards the end of the series, but let me just say this. All followers have more influence regarding their ability to help their leader than they realize, and it's not just wives with husbands. It's all, no matter what the dynamic is, all followers, and this is the problem oftentimes with organizations and leadership is that leaders oftentimes realize that they've got to meet certain standards and accomplish certain things while followers often see themselves as being able to just kind of drag behind and not meet their potential. But you need to understand that followers are the key to a leader's success, and for this reason, you may not have noticed this, but for this reason, in fact, I'd like you to go to Ephesians, if you would. Ephesians 5 in the New Testament, you've got Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, Acts, Romans, 1 Corinthians, Galatians, Ephesians, Ephesians 5. If you're familiar with the book of Ephesians, you know that in Ephesians 5, Paul begins to deal with, in chapters 5 and chapter 6, begins to address the dynamic of follower and leader relationships, and it's interesting to me, and I'm not going to take the time to develop this for you. I'm just going to say this, and hopefully it'll resonate with you if you're familiar with the work, with the passage of Scripture, and if not, then hopefully you'll go home and read it yourself. But it is interesting to me that God addresses the wives before He addresses the husbands. He then addresses the children before He addresses the parents. He tells the children to obey the parents in the Lord, for this is right, before He tells the fathers not to provoke their children to rot. He addresses the wives to submit unto their husbands before He addresses the husband and tells the husbands to love their wives. He addresses the servants before He addresses the masters. It's interesting if you consider the fact that God addresses the follower before He addresses the leader, the wife before He addresses the husband, the children before He addresses the parents, the servant before He addresses the masters, and the reason for that is because the key is in the follower. The follower has the potential to make his leader or to destroy his leader. So why? In the context of a marriage, I want you to understand that you have the power. You have the power. If you are sitting there complaining about your husband, you should look in the mirror and realize that it is you who was created by God to bring out the best in your husband. And if you're not, I'm not taking responsibility away from your husband, trust me. And let me just say this, and again, we're still in the introductory statements, but let me just say this. If you're a lazy bum of a husband, your sermon is coming, all right? And you wives, you know, make sure you get your husband back here next week. But your wives have the power to be able to help. So let me give you six statements regarding how to help your husband reach his full potential, how wives can help their husbands reach their full potential, and we'll try to move to this as quickly as possible. Number one, six statements, how to help your husband reach his full potential. Number one, how to help your husband reach his full potential. Let him lead. Let him lead. Ephesians 5 and verse 22, the Bible says this, Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church, and he is the savior of the body. Therefore, as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. And I want you to notice a couple of things that I just want to highlight for you that I think when we read these verses we oftentimes don't highlight. First of all, I want you to notice that the Bible says, wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands. The Bible does not teach that every wife has to submit to every husband or every woman has to submit to every man. The Bible does teach that wives are to submit to themselves to their own husbands. What I think is funny about that statement is that today you will have women by the millions who have no problem. In fact, they find purpose, supposedly, and they find fulfillment, supposedly, in their ability to be able to go off into the workplace and submit themselves to somebody else's husband while refusing to submit themselves to their own husbands. And the Bible says, and I would just submit to you that the Bible teaches, and all I've got for you is the word of God today, so if you thought that there was any sort of additional philosophy that you were going to get other than what the Bible says, you're sadly mistaken. The Bible says that wives are to submit themselves to their own husbands as unto the Lord. You say, why is it as unto the Lord? Because it is God who gave you that husband. If you are married here this morning, I don't care if it's your first marriage or your fifteenth marriage, the marriage you are in is God's will for your life, and you are to submit yourself unto your own husband as unto the Lord. And the Bible says that wives are to be subject unto their own husbands, verse 24, so let the wives be to their own husbands, and here's the key word, everything. Everything. It doesn't say some things. It doesn't say most things. It says everything. Now what does this mean to let him lead? Listen, ladies, if you want to bring out the best in your husband, if you want to bring out the full potential in your husband, you must let him lead. What does that mean? Well, a couple of things. For your husband to reach his full potential, he must be the leader of your home. To do that, you must submit to his leadership and authority. I think that's obvious that is what the Bible is teaching. Let me just get a little more practical and say this, and by the way, this is going to be a super practical sermon. I mean, all the sermons around here are practical, but this is going to be very practical. In fact, I would say uncomfortably practical, and those are my favorite. Letter B. Let your husband lead in all areas. Let him control all decision making. If you want to have a happy marriage and you want to bring out the best and the potential in your husband, ladies, you need to allow him to lead. What does that mean? Because in fundamental Baptist circles, what I've learned is that what it means to lead for a wife to submit herself to her husband, it means that they publicly give lip service to, well, he's the leader and I submit, and they have those things, but when it actually comes to making a decision, either the wife puts on the pants and makes a decision, or if the husband tries to actually be a man and have a backbone and make a decision and the wife doesn't like it, then she just turns into a nagging monster until she can nag him into submission, and you can go ahead and call that biblical womanhood, but I'm here to tell you something, ladies, that is not. In fact, the only way that we ever will know, ladies, and let me just say it this way, the only way that you and the only way that your husband will ever know whether you actually are a biblically submissive wife is when you come to a point in your marriage where a decision has to be made and he's making a decision that you don't agree with, and at that moment, the way you respond and the way you react will actually tell us everything that we need to know about your willingness to submit to your husband as unto the Lord. So let your husband lead in all areas. Let him control all decision-making. Let me just say a couple things, and again, I realize some of you are going to walk out of here and say, I'm going to show up and you can say whatever you want. I actually have a happy marriage, and I don't mean this in an arrogant way and please don't misunderstand me, but my wife doesn't need this sermon. My wife wrote this sermon. I'm not up here making these statements because I'm trying to correct something in my marriage. I'm trying to help you. So ladies, if you want to be happy, only give your opinion to your husband if he asks for it. Only give your opinion to your husband if he asks for it. You say, what if I think he's wrong? Even if you think he's wrong. Now let me just say something about this. You say, well, what if I think he's wrong? It's better for your marriage for him to make the wrong decision and fall and fail and fall flat on his face and to have seen that you loved him and you supported him. He will love you for it. By the way, ladies, if he fails, if he falls flat on his face, that will be more of a character learning experience for him than if you nagged him into submission. Nagging him into submission will only make him bitter and resentful towards you, even if it works out, even if you're right. But if he's wrong and he fails, but he sees that you stood behind him and you loved him and you encouraged him and you were there on his side, not only will he learn the lesson better, he'll love you for it. And let me just say this. There's always the case, ladies, that you're the one who's wrong. There's always the possibility that he's actually not wrong. And in the instances, in the instances where your husband makes a decision that you disagree with and you choose to submit and support him anyway and he goes and makes that decision and he does not fail and he actually succeeds, it might be a lesson for you on how to actually trust the God-given authority that God has placed over you. So I would say if you want to have a happy marriage, and whether you want to have a happy marriage or not makes no difference to me other than the fact that it just requires more work as a church. It's better if you have a better marriage. But personally, I don't have to go home and live with you. I would advise that you only give your opinion if he asks for it. I would also advise that you only give your opinion if you believe the decision that he is making is a sin. And I don't have time to develop this, but the Bible teaches that we ought to obey God rather than men. And though your husband is your God-given authority, if your husband is asking you to sin or to do something that is wrong, at that point, then you are to obey God rather than men. So if you believe that the decision that's being made is going to cause you to sin or cause your children to sin, then you should give your opinion in a kind and respectful way. Other than that, you should only give your opinion if he asks for it. Your husband would be wise to ask for his wife's opinion. We'll talk about that next week. But listen, wife, you all know why your husband never asks for your opinion? Because he realizes that every time he asks for your opinion, as soon as you give it, that's what he's going to have to do. Or he's going to be sleeping on the couch for the next month. So if you want your husband, you say, I don't understand why he doesn't ask. Maybe because you're a nightmare. And maybe if he knew that he could get an unbiased opinion from you, but that you would support him and encourage him, even if he happened to disagree, he might find that you have more conversations. So let your husband lead in all areas. Let him be in control of all decision making. He should make all decisions. Let her see. And look, again, I'm going to say this probably a hundred more times in the sermon. You do what you want. I've been married in June of this year. My wife and I will celebrate 19 years of marriage. This year, we'll have been married longer than we lived not married. And we're happy. You do what you want. I don't want to look at marriage like some sort of a life sentence, you know, doing 50 to life. Hoping someone sticks me with a lethal injection. Let her see. Never tell him to do anything. I really hope you heard that. Never tell him to do anything. Do not boss him around. Moms can sometimes get so used to bossing their children around, as they should, they should. Moms should boss their children around. Mom's the boss when it comes to the children. But moms can sometimes get so used to bossing their children around, as they should, that they then transfer that over to their husband when he comes home. Do not boss him around. If you are a wife who works, and look, obviously we don't necessarily recommend that because of situations and people find themselves in situations where sometimes a wife has to go off to work and that's fine. I'm not judging you. I'm just trying to help you. If you are a wife who goes off to work, you may be used to bossing other people around at work and bossing other men around at work, but do not bring that home. Do not transfer that into your home. You are not his mom. You are not his boss. So stop acting like it. Never tell him what to do. Don't tell him what to do. Don't boss him around. You say, well, I can't believe it. Look, keep doing what you're doing then and be miserable. But if you want to help your husband reach his full potential, and maybe what we should actually call this is how to help your marriage reach its full, loving potential, part one. We'll cover part two next week. Then let him lead. What does that mean? That means that he should be in charge, that you should submit yourself to his leadership and authority, that he should make decisions in all areas, that you should never tell him to do anything. Number two. There are six of these. It's going to be a long sermon. Look at Ephesians 5.33. Nevertheless, to every one of you, in particular, the soul of his wife, even as himself, and the wife, see that she reverence. Do you see that word reverence? The word reverence means deep respect or honor. It means to be in awe of. And the wife says she reverence her husband. Number two, if you want to help your husband reach his full potential, number one, let him lead. Number two, be respectful. Be respectful. What does that mean? That means don't talk down to him. He's not your child. Don't criticize him. Don't criticize him. You say, I don't think that's fair. Well, look, next week I'm going to be preaching the sermon geared towards the husbands, and guess what I'm going to tell the husbands? Don't criticize your wife. I don't think couples should be criticizing each other. Don't criticize him. Don't treat him as though he is below you. One of the things that triggers men so often is this thing where they're being treated as though they are a child or as though they are below. And here's the advice that I would give ladies. Don't treat your husband as though he is below you. And let me take it a step further. Don't even treat him as though he is equal to you. You say, I can't believe it. Look, we're all created in God's image. Every single human being has equal value in the eyes of God. I didn't say that women were less valuable than men. What I am saying is don't even treat him as though he is your equal. You say, well, I can't believe you said that. Well, I would say that to employees. By the way, let me just go ahead and say to employees, hey, employees, don't go to work and treat your boss as though he's your equal. He's not. He signs your check. You don't sign his check. So when you find yourself in a position where you're the follower and they're the leader, you don't treat yourself as though you're an equal. Now, in the eyes of God, we're all equal. But in the position you find yourself, even the Lord Jesus Christ, the Bible tells us, submitted himself under the authority of the Father. Now, they're both co-equal, co-eternal, co-God. But in their positions, one submits to the authority of the other. So wife, I would advise that you not only don't treat your husband like he's below you, but I would advise don't even treat your husband as though he's your equal. Go to 1 Peter, 1 Peter chapter number 3. If you start backwards at the book of Revelation and go backwards, you have Jude 3, 2 and 1 John, 2 Peter, 1 Peter. Revelation, Jude 3, 2 and 1 John, 2 Peter, 1 Peter, 1 Peter chapter 3. You say, well, you don't want me to treat him like he's below me. You don't want me to treat him as he's my equal. Then how should I treat him? You should treat him like he is your leader. You should treat him like he is your boss. You should treat him like he is your God-given authority. You say, why? Because he is. 1 Peter chapter 3 verse 6, even as Sarah obeyed Abraham, notice these words, calling him Lord, whose daughters ye are as long as ye do well and are not afraid with any amazement. The Bible highlights the fact that Sarah was a very, was a daughter, she highlighted herself as a daughter of God by the way that she addressed her husband calling him Lord. And of course in the ancient world, the word Lord does not have the same idea that you and I think of it today. When we think of Lord, we think of something like deity, but the word Lord simply means boss. Just like a man goes off to work and his boss says, do X, Y, and Z, and he says, yes, sir. You got it, boss? That same respect is the respect the Bible tells us that Sarah had for her husband Abraham calling him Lord. So you should treat him with respect. You say, what does that mean? It means you don't talk down to him. It means you don't criticize him. It means you don't treat him as though he is below you. It means you don't even treat him as though he is your equal, though of course we are all equals in the eyes of God as far as value. But positionally, you treat him as though he is your leader, as though he is your boss, as though he is your God-given authority. Now you can sit here and say, well this goes against everything that the secular world teaches on marriage. But I would remind you, the same secular world that is flaunting a 60% divorce rate, is that what you're talking about? It sure seems like they know what they're talking about. But their 60% divorce rate, yeah, I'm supposed to listen to that. That's where I'm supposed to get my marriage advice. No, I think I'll go with the Bible. Number three, to help your husbands reach their full potential, number one, let him lead. Number two, be respectful. Number three, ask for help. Ask for help. Now if you're going to ask for help, you should ask from a position of vulnerability and humility. Are you there in 1 Peter chapter 3? Look at verse 7. 1 Peter chapter 3 verse 7, likewise ye husbands dwell with them according to knowledge, notice the words, giving honor unto the wife as unto the weaker vessel. The Bible teaches that the wife is the weaker vessel. Now I always like to point this out. The Bible does not teach that she is the weak vessel. If it said that giving honor unto the wife as unto the weak vessel, that would lead us to believe that the wife is the weak vessel as opposed to the husband that is the strong vessel. That is not what the Bible says. The Bible does not say that she's the weak vessel. The Bible says that she's the weaker vessel, meaning she's weaker than the other guy who's also weak. Because none of us are strong. Our strength comes from the Bible and the Lord Jesus Christ. I can be strong in His strength. His strength is made perfect in our weakness. But I will say this, though your husband is weak, ladies, you are weaker. You're the weaker vessel. That's what the Bible says. I don't care what evolution says. I don't care what science says. You are the weaker vessel. I think that's evident. So if you're going to ask for help, you should ask from a position of vulnerability and humility. You should be asking, instead of telling your husband, you should be asking for his help because you are the weaker vessel. But when you ask, you need to be mindful about how you ask and you should be asking from a position of vulnerability and from a position of humility. If you're going to ask for help, please listen to me. If you're going to ask for help, you should be mindful of what you are asking him to do. Let me just give you some examples. And I want to give you these examples, and obviously these are not the only examples, but I want to make sure that you kind of understand. If you're going to ask for help, be mindful of what you're asking him to do. Now look, again, if you're a lady that works somewhere and you're the boss or whatever, I'm not telling you to ask those people for help. Tell them what to do. If you're the boss, but you're not the boss at home. So at home, don't go home and start bossing your husband around. If you need his help, ask for help. If you're going to ask for help, be mindful of what you are asking him to do. What does that mean? Let me give you some examples. Let's say, ladies, you are cooking dinner. And let's say the baby is crying, being fussy. And the food is going to burn. If the food is going to burn, if the baby can't be calmed down, then ask your husband to help. But ask him to help by holding the baby, not by taking over the cooking. See, your husband, if you have a baby, is also a father. So asking him to help in a position in which he already holds as a father is not inappropriate. In fact, it's a good thing. It's a good thing for fathers to spend time with their children. Now, if your husband works all week, and the wife is a stay-at-home mom, and it's your job to cook, then don't ask him to do your job. Now, you husbands, if you send your wives off to work, then that's a different story, and we can talk about that next week. But if you're going to ask him to help, don't ask him to do the, I'm going to go ahead and say, somebody can make a clip about it or whatever, but don't ask him to do the womanly task. Ask him to help you by holding the baby. That's a good thing, not by taking over the cooking. Let's say that you're cooking. Let's say the baby had a blowout in their diaper. Diapers leaking everywhere. Don't ask him to change the diaper. You can ask him to hold the baby. Can you hold the baby? Let me finish this. Can you mind helping me with the baby? Can you help me with the baby? It might shock you. He might take that baby and change the diaper. But I promise you, if you say, change the baby's diaper, not only is he probably not going to change the baby's diaper, that poop is going to get everywhere. Because you're speaking to your husband in a way, look, you can do whatever you want. I'm just trying to help you. You're speaking to your husband in a way that makes him want to hate you. I will be teaching this in more detail when I deal with the sermon on children. There's a sermon coming called How to Help Your Children Reach Their Full Potential. So you kids don't get all offended when I preach that. I can't believe you did. But this principle applies to all followers. I'm going to really narrow it down when it comes to the children, but it applies to everything. And you leaders, you might just want to learn this. Leaders should never allow their followers to do things that make them not like them. Now, I did not say that leaders should not allow their followers to do things that they don't like. Because all followers do things that leaders don't like. Oftentimes, in this church and with my employees, they do things that I don't like. And when they do things that I don't like, I let it slide. But when they do things that make me not like them, that's a different story. And parents should not allow their children. Now, your children might do things you don't like, and that's okay. Especially as they get older and become teenagers, they start doing a lot of stupid things. Maybe they're not sinful, they're not things you necessarily like. Then don't let them do things you don't like. That's fine. But don't let them do things that make you not like them. And wife, I'm saying this to you because it's not that you're doing things that your husband doesn't like, it's that you are doing things that make your husband not like you. And that's where you need to be careful. Let me say this, let her see. If you're going to ask for help, make sure you're asking as little as possible. As least as possible. Only when needed. You say, why? Because what I've noticed with marriage, and I've dealt with a lot of marriages, over the last 12 years of ministry, my wife and I have spent a lot of time counseling marriages, and we're happy to do it. I'm not picking on you. I might feel like it, but some of you need to get picked on. What I've learned with marriages is that there's these two extremes. One extreme is you've got the, I am woman, hear me roar. Just crazy, independent, strong. And there's problems there. Obviously. The other extreme is you've got this big baby. You've got these women in these fundamental Baptist churches who think like, oh, I'm just supposed to be a big baby. They can't do anything. They can't go anywhere. They can't accomplish anything. Their husbands literally have to do everything. Listen to me, ladies. Your husband will eventually grow to resent you. You know what you need to be? And again, we're talking about marriage, but this applies to every area. It's to be a follower who is capable of being a leader. See, the Lord has given me a beautiful wife who's spiritually submissive in every way, shape or form, but she's not useless and capable. She's smart. She's independent. In fact, if I died, you guys might want to consider just making her the pastor. So there is power in being a strong, intelligent, independent woman who chooses not because she's afraid of her husband in a negative sense, but because she's afraid of her God. She chooses to submit herself to her God. There's power in that. But becoming this useless baby that can't do anything, can't accomplish anything, that is not an option, ladies. Now next week, I'll be talking to your husbands who are idiots and trying to keep you useless and trying to keep you dumb. And the husbands out there who don't want their wives to have access to money, don't want their wives to have access to a vehicle, don't want their wives to have access to anything, there's something wrong with you, man. And all it shows is your own insecurity. We'll talk about that next week. You ladies, don't be the big baby where you just need him to do everything. In fact, you should have a rule. If you're going to ask him for help, ask him for help. But ask as little as possible. Ask yourself, can I do this without my husband? You might find that your husband starts stepping in just because he's so impressed. And if you've got teenagers, wives, please get this. Don't ever ask your husband to do something that your teenage son can do. I mean, you do whatever you want in your home. I don't think that a husband needs to be taking the trash out when he's got a 15-year-old male body sitting on the couch playing video games. Not in my home, I'm talking about yours. If you're going to ask for help, make sure you're asking as little as possible, and don't be a big baby. Get things done. Get things accomplished. Be productive. Be a hard worker. Letter D. If you're going to ask for help, bring him your problems and let him come up with solutions. What is often the problem in marriage when we're talking about the problems from the wife is this, that wives are often trying to tell their husbands what to do. Stop telling them what to do. Look, just on a practical level, it doesn't work. It makes him mad, it makes him not like you, and then he doesn't do it anyway. So quit telling him what to do and just bring him the problems with the right attitude, with the right spirit, and ask him to solve your problems. That's actually what a husband wants to do. I'm talking about a good husband. Some of you married, I don't know, and we'll talk about that next week. Maybe they need some testosterone shots or something. But if you have a strong husband who actually has some dignity and respect for himself, he actually wants to be your hero. He wants to be your provider. He wants to be your protector, but he doesn't want to be bossed around by you. Don't tell him what you want him to do. Don't even tell him what you would like him to do. Just bring him the problems and let him solve it. Let him solve it. I often tell wives, and look, and you say, well, I don't understand. Here's a little, and you might think like, oh, it's just semantics. Semantics matter. How we communicate matters. How we speak matters. So listen, wife, I'm just telling you, you do whatever you want, but I'm just telling you, don't come home and tell your husband, you need to change the oil in the car. He'll let that car run until the engine explodes just to not do what you told him to do. But if you come home and say, hey, honey, some light came on in the car. I'm not sure what to do about it. You think you could look at it? I'm just saying, bring him your problems. Bring him your problems, without solutions, in a spirit of vulnerability, humility, being mindful that you're not asking him to do something that goes against his masculinity, and being mindful that you're not just being a big baby that's making him do everything. And you might be shocked at that worthless scumbag you call a husband might actually rise to the occasion and be a hero. Letter E, if you're going to ask for help, make sure to appreciate him when he does help. Appreciate what you like. If he does something and you like it, appreciate it. Look, you say it's not fair, not fair, whatever. Life's not fair, then you die. Let me just break something down to you, ladies. You can read the Love Languages book, and I'm not against the Love Languages book. I think it's a good book. I think it's insightful. I think every couple should read the seven love languages. But let me just save you a little time on the reading. Your husband's love languages, there's pretty much just two love languages men have. Physical touch and words of affirmation. I mean, there are some guys out there, like I said, they need to toss their own shot, but that's rare. Ninety-nine percent of men, you know what they like? Physical touch and words of affirmation. So your husband solves a problem for you, your husband does something for you, give him a hug and say thank you. You say, that's silly. Be miserable. I have to hug him every time he takes the trash out. Do you want the trash taken out? I'm just telling you, if every time your husband took the trash out, he got a big hug and said, I've never seen somebody so muscular and I've never seen anyone. I mean, there'll never be a piece of trash in your house. Those teenage boys will never have the opportunity to take the trash out. He'll be taking it every chance he gets. Or you can file for divorce. Do what you want. I'm just trying to help you. Help your husband reach his full potential. Number one, let him lead. Number two, be respectful. Number three, ask for help. Number four, be feminine. Be feminine. First Peter chapter three, verse one, likewise you wives be in subjection to your own husbands. That if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives while they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. Notice verse three, whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of the plating of the hair and of wearing of gold or of putting on of apparel, but let it be the hidden man of the heart and that which is not corruptible, even the ornament. Please notice it. Even the ornament and ornaments like jewelry. Now I want you to notice the context. He says in verse three, whose adorning let it not be the outward adorning of plating of the hair and of wearing of gold and of putting on of apparel. Let me tell you something ladies, and I think that ladies should look nice and you should try to look nice and the virtuous woman in Proverbs 31 made sure that she looked nice and I'm not preaching against that, but I am telling you this. If you put as much work in having the right attitude with your husband as you do into your hair, you might be shocked. There's only so far that physical looks will take you. Eventually it doesn't matter how curled that hair is, if you're a nightmare, it's not going to want to be around you. Now some of us get lucky and we get the beauty and the humility. Not everybody has that luck. But you can at least be feminine. Let it be the hidden man of the heart and that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit which is in the sight of God of great price. The Bible says that wives and women should adorn themselves. The ornament that they should put on is this, a meek and quiet spirit. What does that mean? That's what we would refer to as being feminine. Being feminine. Now keep your place there in 1 Peter, we're going to come back to it, but go with me if you would to the book of Proverbs, Proverbs chapter 21. If you open your Bible just right in the center, you're more than likely following the book of Psalms, right after Psalms you have the book of Proverbs. Proverbs chapter 21, keep your place in 1 Peter. And again, if you're mad and angry and whatever, look, first of all, I'm not your husband. And not only do I not care if you're mad at me, in fact I like it. I will consider, the anger you are at me means nothing to me as long as you go home and do these things. Okay, so I don't need you to, you know, I don't need your approval. I've got one wife. As long as she's happy, that's all I need. The rest of you, I'm the leader here, so let me just reiterate, I don't care what you think. My job is to preach the Bible to you. You do what you want with it. But you're not going to blame me for you having a bad marriage. Because at least somebody stood up and told you the truth. And the truth is this, that your husband wants a feminine woman. So ladies, you ought to be the opposite of masculine. You ought to always, in every area of your life, be feminine. Please understand this, men naturally respond to femininity. Men naturally respond to femininity. The more masculine you are, the more you will repel him. The more masculine you are, the more he'll want to get away from you. The more masculine you are, the less he'll want to talk to you, the less he'll want to do for you, the less time he'll want to spend with you. Men are naturally attracted to femininity. So if you know that, ladies, then lean into your femininity. Lean into it. Because being masculine as a woman is a repellent to your husband. This is why the Bible says, Proverbs 21, 9, it is better to dwell in the corner of a housetop than with a brawling woman in a white house. Your husband doesn't want a brawling woman. That's masculine. You say, well, what he's doing is causing me to sin and I have to tell him he's wrong and an argument might even come from it. Look, here's what I'm saying. Try not to argue. But even if you're going to argue, ladies, argue in a feminine way. Because the Bible says the Holy Spirit, this is what God thinks. You understand God wrote this? I don't like that. I don't care. But here's what God said. God said it is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop than with a brawling woman in a white house. Proverbs 21, 19, it is better to dwell in the wilderness. Proverbs 21, 19, it is better to dwell in the wilderness than with a contentious and an angry woman. Proverbs chapter 7, look, you do what you want with it. I'm just telling you that men are naturally going to respond to femininity. The more masculine you are, the more you will repel him. So lean into your femininity. By the way, God made you a female. Male and female created them. This whole I am woman, hear me roar, you didn't get that from the Bible. You got that from a bunch of atheist, communist, secular world. You know what the Bible says about the strange woman in Proverbs chapter 7? The strange woman, the adulterous woman, the woman who's not faithful and good to her husband, Proverbs 7 verse 11? You know what the Bible says about her? It says, she is loud and stubborn. That's the opposite of a meek and quiet spirit. Ladies often are shocked by how strongly their husbands fight and argue against them. And I'm not condoning it, men. I think it's pretty petty of you to get in a screaming match with a woman. It's ridiculous. You ought to be ashamed and embarrassed. That's the sermon for next week. But I will say to you ladies, the reason that he feels comfortable getting in a screaming match is because when he sees you, he doesn't see femininity, he sees masculinity. So be opposite of masculine. Don't be the brawling woman in a white house. Don't be the contentious and angry woman. Don't be loud and stubborn. Have an ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. Number five. We're talking about how to help your husband reach his full potential. Number one, I said let him lead. Number two, be respectful. Number three, ask for help. Number four, be feminine. Here's number five. Don't be clingy. Don't be clingy. If you don't like that, say don't be needy. Ladies, your job, remember you're his help me? Your job is to help your husband reach his full potential. If your husband's a loser, you ought to blame yourself. Now there's a responsibility that he should take, but you ought to take responsibility for your husband's success. There's an old story, an old joke. I don't know if it's true. I'm sure it's not true, but I like it. And I'm going to say this, and some of you are going to come and tell me that so-and-so's a mason. I don't care. I'm sure he is. There's a story about George Bush, number one, the first George Bush. And I'm sure he's a mason. I don't care. I didn't vote for him. I wouldn't vote for him. I don't vote for anybody. I don't like politics. But there's a story about George Bush while he was on the campaign trail with his wife. They were in a limousine in Texas, and they were driving through the Texas farm fields, and the limousine needed to be filled, and they stopped at a gas station. They were kind of near the area of where he's originally from, him and his wife were originally from, and the gas attendant comes out and starts helping them and all these things. And his wife recognizes the gas attendant, and they're like, oh, hi, and they start talking and whatever. And she kind of gets back in the limousine and starts talking to her husband, and he says, how do you know him? And she said, oh, we went to high school together. Actually, we dated in high school. He was my high school sweetheart. The story goes that George Bush says to his wife, she starts laughing and saying, that's your high school sweetheart? The guy that runs the gas station? He's like, man, you dodged the bullet there. If you would have married him, imagine, you were married to the president of the United States, but if you had married him, you could have been married to the guy that runs the gas station. And she just chuckled and said, don't be silly. If I would have married him, he'd be the president. And the truth is this, that there's probably some truth to that. That women hold the power to bring out the best in their husbands. So ladies, realize that you have the key to help your husband. Let him lead. Be respectful. Ask for help. Be feminine. Number five, don't be clingy. This is what I'm saying. Men of worth, the whole reason I got off on that rabbit's trail was to say this. You have the power to bring out the best in your husband. Your job is to try to make him a man worth something, a man of value. But please understand this. Men of worth want women of worth. And women of worth are confident and have their own strengths and honestly have their own things going on in life. The Bible says in Proverbs 31, 25, can you go to Proverbs 31? Remember Proverbs 31, the virtuous woman? And by the way, this is why next week I'm going to be preaching against you husbands who just try to keep your wives dumb and incapable and unable. Look, I'm just telling you, you should try to help your wife, husband, your job is to help your wife succeed. Her job is to try to help you succeed. But ladies, since I'm talking to you this morning, let me just say this. Men of worth want women of worth. And women of worth are confident. They're strong. They're intelligent. They've got their own things going on. Notice here Proverbs 31, verse 25, strength and honor. This is a virtuous woman. This is the epitome of a godly woman is outlined in Proverbs 31. And the Bible says, strength and honor are her clothing. There's not a weak woman. There's a woman that has value. She's strong and she has honor. Strength and honor are her clothing and she shall rejoice in time to come. Go to Proverbs 31, look at verse 18. Proverbs 31, verse 18. She perceives it. Notice her value. She perceives it that her merchandise is good. Her candle goes not out by night. She's a woman of worth. Look at verse 31, last verse of the chapter, Proverbs 31, 31. Give her of the fruit of her hands and, notice, let her own words praise her in the gates. A woman, a virtuous woman is a woman of value. That's why 1 Peter said that she is in the sight of God of great price. She's a woman of value. She's worth something. And a man that is worthy, a man that is worth value, a man of value wants a woman of worth, wants a woman of value. And a woman of worth is a confident woman, a strong woman, an intelligent woman, an independent woman. I don't mean that in the sense that the feminists say that. But meaning not just this helpless woman that can't do anything. And listen to me, ladies. You need to make sure that being clingy devalues you. Do you understand that? Let me just say this. Being clingy and needing him all of the time, not only is that going to suffocate him and not only is that going to make him feel like you're trying to control him and make him resentful towards you, it devalues you. Because let me let you in on a little secret, ladies. The same things that attracted you to each other should be the things that are happening in your marriage. And before you were married, the way it should have happened, maybe it didn't happen like this in your case and whatever, but the way it's supposed to happen is this. The man chases you. He chases you. He's interested in you. Now, your husband should be chasing you as well. He should chase you to an extent, obviously, you're married. But to an extent, your husband should be chasing you, pursuing you like you were when you were dating. But please understand something. He cannot do that if you're always clinging to him. If you're just always, I need you, I just can't, I just need all the time, all the attention. How could he ever chase you? He can't get away from you. And it devalues you. It devalues you. The virtualist woman, you know what she's doing? She's running her business from home. She's strong. She's intellectual. She's got money. Proverbs 31 woman had money. She was investing. She was working. She had her own stuff going on. She had her own life going on. And because of that, she was a woman of value, of great price, the Bible says. Her price is far above rubies. So be careful about being this clingy, needy woman. And by the way, let me just say this. Remember the two extremes? The two extremes of women are, I am woman, hear me roar. Nightmare. And then the clingy, just big baby on this side. But you know, oftentimes what happens is big baby, clingy woman on this side is just enabling her husband to sin and to do wrong. Because she just needs so much. She just needs so much. Have some respect for yourself. Now don't become this woman. Be feminine. Be godly. Have some character and integrity. Have some strength. Look, I'm just telling you. I'm just telling you, if you want to bring out the best in your husband, you become a person of value. And being clingy and needy devalues you. It devalues you. Number six. This is the last one. Probably should have been done 20 minutes ago because this is not going well. I'll try again next week. I thought I'd start with the smarter group, but apparently that didn't work. Number six. We're talking about how to bring. Aren't you worried about offending us? No. Can you tell? No. How to help you reach your full potential. Number one, let him lead. Number two, be respectful. Number three, ask for help. Number four, be feminine. Number five, don't be clingy. Number six. This is probably the most important one, which is why I left it for the end. If you've heard nothing, maybe just hear this. Number six, be on his team. Be on his team. Look at our Proverbs 31 lady. Proverbs 31, 10. Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband does safely trust in her. He has confidence in her so that she shall have no need of spoil. Look at verse 12. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life. You know, ladies, what you need to do for your husband. And by the way, let me just say it. I've been saying it this whole time. Let me just say it. It's not just for wives and husbands. It's every area of leadership. Whenever you find yourself in a position to follow her, the best thing you can do for your leader is be on his team. What does that mean? It means you don't debate him. Wives, if you are debating with your husband, you've already lost. You don't debate him. You don't compete with him. Don't be competition with him. And you don't side with others against him. Be on his side. You say, what if he's wrong? You can be on his side and not incur, you know, this. Here's the thing. If you actually develop a relationship where you guys could talk to each other, a humble, spiritual, beautiful wife could approach her husband in the spirit of meekness and quietness and say, husband, you know, I love you. You know, I'm on your side. You know, I'll follow you to whatever end. But you may want to consider X, Y, and Z. You're not telling them what to do. You are communicating to them, I'm on your side. I'm for you. Often what I find with followers that is so annoying to those of us that leave them is that they'll just, you know, here's my favorite thing as a pastor. My favorite, and when I say favorite, I mean sarcastic, but my favorite, not so favorite thing is when a follower will, like, email me or text me or say something to me and it's negative, right? Hey, pastor, I thought you should know all these people are saying all these bad things about you on social media, period. And I'm just like, are you for me? Are you against me? Where are you at? Are you on my team or not? I don't think that matters, exactly, which is why you suck as a follower, probably. You know the ones I like are the ones like, hey, pastor, I'm for you. I heard this garbage online, and I don't believe it, but I just want you to know in case you hear about it. You know, that makes me feel like, wow, this person's on my team. This person's for me. I just thought you should know X, Y, and Z, and then just like, period. I'm like, okay, do I have to worry about you? Are you okay? Do I have to explain something to you? What's going on here? Listen, wife, if there's anyone that should be on your husband's team, it's you. Be on his team. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life. So don't debate with him. Don't compete with him. Don't side with others against him. If you need him to do something, ask him from a spirit of vulnerability, bringing your problem, letting him solve it, but don't tell him what to do. Don't boss him around. Be respectful. Be feminine. Have some respect for yourself, and you might find that that frog you call a husband turns into a prince. This bar has a Navajo word of prayer. Heavenly Father, Lord, I realize that sermons like these are not popular, and in our culture, they're considered hostile, but they're the truth. And Lord, I do pray. I've joked, but I do pray that every lady in this room would realize that she has a pastor and a pastor's wife that's on her side, and it would be easier to not preach a sermon like this, but I'm preaching it because we want her to succeed. And the only way for her to succeed as a helpmate is to help her husband succeed. So Lord, I pray that you'd help every lady here take the things we've talked about to heart. They would not simply dismiss them. They would think about it. They would consider maybe where they can change how they speak, how they act, how they respond, how they react. But they would begin to see their husbands bring out their full potential. And Lord, I pray for the husbands next week as I preach to them. Help them to have their hearts ready and prepared to receive from your work. In the matchless name of Christ, we pray. Amen. Alright, we're going to have Brother Matt come up and lead us in a final song. I just want to remind you a couple of things. First of all, don't forget that for the Ladies' Tea, if you'd like to help with some volunteer opportunities, we've got sign-up sheets in the main foyer. There's clipboards there. You can go by and sign up for that. Also, don't forget Children's Choir today at 5.15, adult choir recordings after the service. I want to encourage you to be back tonight, 6 p.m. We're going to take a break from the Wilderness Wandering Series. I'm going to be preaching a sermon, I think it's going to be an interesting sermon. I hope you'll find it interesting. It's a long title, alright? I'll just go ahead and give it to you. I'm preaching on the subject of, it's just a stand-alone sermon. I'll be preaching at a camp this week. I'm actually preaching the sermon there, but I'm going to preach it to you first. It's on the subject of how documented history affirms the biblical accounts of the origins of man. I know that's a long title and I hope that makes sense, but I think you'll find it interesting. I encourage you to be with us tonight, 6 p.m. Anytime the Word of God is open, it's good. I'm just trying to say this. You don't have to worry about me preaching against your husband or wife or children or whatever. When we talk about the origins of man, I think we're all safe there, alright? So we'd love for you to join us at 6 p.m. If there's anything we can do for you, please let us know. My brother Matt, come up and lead us in a final song. Turn to song 250. Two, five, zero. 250 on the first. Days are filled with sorrow and care. Hearts are lonely and near. Burdens are lifted at Calvary. Jesus is very near. Burdens are lifted at Calvary. Calvary, Calvary. Burdens are lifted at Calvary. Jesus is very near. Cast your care on Jesus today. Leave your worry and fear. Burdens are lifted at Calvary. Jesus is very near. Burdens are lifted at Calvary. Calvary, Calvary. Burdens are lifted at Calvary. Jesus is very near. Good on the last. Troubled soul the Savior can see. That heartache and fear. Burdens are lifted at Calvary. Jesus is very near. Burdens are lifted at Calvary. Calvary, Calvary. Burdens are lifted at Calvary. Jesus is very near. Amen. Good singing before we leave here. If anybody has questions about salvation, church membership, or baptism, the pastor will be at the door. He would love to talk to you or direct you to someone who is training you to talk about that. Brother Graham, would you close us in prayer? Father God, thank you for that message. Please give us the bravery to follow and obey it. Bless the rest of this day and bring us back safely tonight. In the name of Jesus Christ, I pray. Amen. Amen. Amen.