(Disclaimer: This transcript is auto-generated and may contain mistakes.)

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🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 We love you, in Jesus' name we pray, Amen. Turn to song 335. 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 335, if Jesus goes with me. 335 on the first. 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 🎵Music🎵 Alright well lets take our bulletins this morning and we will look for some announcements real quickly If you do not have a bulletin just raise your hand and one of our ushers can get one for you If you need a bulletin just put your hand up And we will get one for you This is the day which the Lord hath made we will rejoice and be glad in it. And that's a good verse there Of course, we like that if you open up your bulletin, you'll see our service times Sunday morning service 10 30 a.m We're so glad of course that you're with us on Sunday morning on the Lord's Day for church We do have church tonight at 6 p.m the Sunday evening service and we encourage you to be with us on the Sunday night for the evening service and It's just another opportunity to be in God's house with God's people Of course under the preaching of the Word of God and then of course we have our Wednesday evening Bible study It's our midweek service. We call it the most encouraging service of the week And we'd love for you to join us on Wednesday for our Bible study if you look at our soul winning times our main solely times on Saturday mornings at 10 a.m And then we have additional sewing times on Thursdays and Sundays at 2 p.m And if so, if you'd like to go out sowing this afternoon There'll be an opportunity for you to be able to do that So winning of course is when we go out in the community We knock doors we invite people to church and we preach the gospel to anyone who's interested If you notice there in the announcements or in the bulletin, you'll see that we are a family integrated church What that means is that children and infants are always welcomed in the service We do not separate children from their parents for any reason However, we do have mother-baby rooms and daddy rooms available for your convenience So if you have a child that's been distracting during the service or if you need some privacy We would encourage you to use those rooms as needed If you're not sure where they're at You can look at the back of the bulletin and you'll see a layout of the church building It'll show you where the mother-baby rooms are where the daddy room is and where the restrooms are all of the rooms have comfortable seating They have monitor setups You can watch the service and listen to it. So make sure you use those rooms as needed if you need to be baptized please let us know we'd love to baptize you and All you need to do is on your communication card on the back of the card There's a place for you to check off that you'd like information about baptism and we'll follow up with you in Regards to that if you look at the announcements and upcoming events Of course, all of the ladies are invited to a baby shower for miss Taylor Marin That is this Saturday June 1st at 3 p.m. And miss Taylor's having a girl She's registered on Amazon and it is a potluck So if you can please bring a dish to share and if you'd like to send attend Please make sure you sign up on your communication card Let us know your plan on being there so that way they can know you're coming and then of course We also have our graduation service coming up next Sunday June 2nd in our evening service at 6 p.m. And of course, we have a homeschool group here with About 90 kids in it and we like to have a graduation service for them So if you're part of our churches homeschool group and you have a graduate either kindergarten or high school That needs to walk and receive their diploma make sure you sign up and let us know on your Communication card so that we can plan for that and if you're not part of our churches homeschool group But you've graduated maybe from a different school or whatever Kindergarten sixth grade eighth grade high school or college. We'd love to recognize you on that night So make sure you fill out the communication card as well and we can recognize your accomplishment as well And we want you to plan to be with us for that Sunday night Of course want you to encourage the graduates but also we're gonna have pizza after the service and fellowship in honor of the graduates and we do need you to Just if you're participating if you are actually walking and receiving a diploma that night We need you to plan to be here at 5 p.m. For a walk through practice that night. Alright, so next Sunday night 5 p.m Make sure you're here for a walk through before the service and then of course We've got Father's Day coming up on Sunday, June 16th at 10 30 a.m We're gonna have our special Father's Day service and we'll have the BBC t-shirts for all of the men and boys in attendance So for Mother's Day, we gave out the ladies BBC t-shirts to all the ladies and girls in attendance for Father's Day We'll give out the men's t-shirts For the men and the boys and we'll have special music from the BBC men's ensemble So make sure you're here for that red hot preaching conference is just right around the corner If you'd like to volunteer to help we would appreciate your help with that You should see a separate communication card there for the red hot preaching conference and there's opportunities for you to be able to volunteer To help clean to sit in the overflow to serve Baskin-Robbins ice cream And then if you are in one of the ministries in the back either the orchestra on the back of the card here The orchestra or the safety team or an usher we would appreciate you letting us know your availability for the conference So that we can make plans for those things Choir practice that practice today at 5 p.m. For the red hot preaching conference So make sure you don't forget about that and choir just so you're aware next week We're going to postpone the conference the practice because of the graduation service. So just make a note of that ladies weight loss accountability group if you ladies would like to be a part of that they meet on Wednesday nights in My wife's office at 615. It's a group that my wife leads You're welcome to be a part of that cleaning crew you can check for your name there Please don't forget to turn your cell phones off or place them on silent during the service that they're not a distraction to anybody And right now it'd be a good time to just look at your phone and make sure you have it on Set on silent or vibrate so it doesn't go off in the middle of the sermon If you look at the back of the bulletin birthdays and anniversaries for the month of May This week we have Jihoo Pompa's birthdays today May 26 and then later this week We have Stephanie Zuniga's birthday on May 27th brother surge and miss a jana goncharov have an anniversary on May 27th But the George McQueen has a birthday on May 28th Daniel Cruz has a birthday on May 30th Miss Abby Santos has a birthday on May 30th and brother Joel and miss Courtney Usher have an anniversary on May 31st Praise report money matters. All of those things are there for you to look at I think that's it for all of the announcements So we're gonna go ahead and sing the chorus of the week, which is the insert in your bulletin And we're gonna sing this song as we prepare to receive the offering this morning This is the kind of song you got to sing with passion All right, so let's go ahead and sing it out on the first I stand amazed sing it out on the first when I Examine that old rugged cross The mighty golf did span It reaches down to the brains To I Singing out on the second when I Imagine in glory that day All of heaven stood still As God in morning the Savior of men Died upon Calvary's hill Here we go, sing it out I stand amazed I stand amazed Of the love that has sought me Saved me and caught me I stand amazed Amen good singing we'll have the guys come up and help us with the offering at this time And let's go ahead and bow our heads and have a word of prayer Heavenly Father Lord, we do love you. We thank you for allowing us to gather together today Well, we pray that you'd bless the offering. We pray that you'd continue to meet our financial needs here We pray that you'd meet with us as we open up your word and study the Bible together in Jesus name. We pray Amen We pray that you'd bless the offering. We pray that you'd continue to meet our financial needs. We pray that you'd continue to bless the offering. We pray that you'd continue to bless the offering. We pray that you'd continue to bless the offering. We pray that you'd continue to bless the offering. We pray that you'd continue to bless the offering. We pray that you'd continue to bless the offering. We pray that you'd continue to bless the offering. We pray that you'd continue to bless the offering. We pray that you'd continue to bless the offering. We pray that you'd continue to bless the offering. We pray that you'd continue to bless the offering. We pray that you'd continue to bless the offering. We pray that you'd continue to bless the offering. Amen. Turn your Bibles to First Timothy chapter 5. First Timothy chapter 5. If you do not have a Bible, please raise your hand and an usher will bring you one. First Timothy chapter 5. We will read the entire chapter as our custom. First Timothy chapter 5. Just keep your hands up and an usher will bring you a Bible. First Timothy chapter 5, the Bible reads, Rebuke not an elder, but entreat him as a father, and the younger men as brethren. The elder women as mothers, the younger as sisters, with all purity. Honor widows that are widows indeed, but if any widow have children or nephews, let them learn first to show piety at home and to requite their parents, for that is good and acceptable before God. Now she that is a widow indeed and desolate, trusteth in God, and continueth in supplications and prayers night and day. But she that liveth in pleasure is dead while she liveth, and these things give in charge, that they may be blameless. But if any provide not for his own, and especially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith and is worse than an infidel. Let not a widow be taken into the number under threescore years, old, having been the wife of one man, well reported of for good works, if she have brought up children, if she has lodged strangers, if she has washed the saints' feet, if she has relieved the afflicted, if she have diligently followed every good work. But the younger widows refuse, for when they have begun to wax wanton against Christ, they will marry, having damnation, because they have cast off their first faith, and with all they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house, and not only idle, but tattlers also in busy bodies, speaking things which they ought not. I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully, for some are already turned aside after Satan. If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the church be charged. That it may relieve them that are widows indeed. Let the elders that rule well be counted worthy of double honor, especially they who labor in the word and doctrine. For the Scripture saith, Thou shalt not muzzle the ox that treadeth out the corn, and the laborer is worthy of his reward. Against an elder receive not an accusation, but before two or three witnesses. Them that sin rebuke before all, that others also may fear. I charge thee there before God, and the Lord Jesus Christ, and the elect angels, that thou observe these things without preferring one before another, doing nothing by partiality. Lay hands suddenly on no man, neither be partaker of other men's sins. Keep thyself pure. Drink no longer water, but use a little wine for thy stomach's sake and thine often infirmities. Some men's sins are opened beforehand, going before to judgment, and some men they follow after. Likewise also the good works of some are manifest beforehand, and they that are otherwise cannot be hid. Let's pray. Almighty Moscahai God, thank you for this day. Thank you for this church. We ask that you bless, Pastor. Let this sermon glorify you. Let us be edified and you honored. In the name of Jesus, I pray. Amen. Amen. Amen. All right, we're there in 1 Timothy chapter number 5. And of course on Sunday mornings we've spent the last many weeks, couple of months, on this subject of emotional intelligence. We've been learning about emotional intelligence through the lens of the Word of God. And we spent several weeks on the concepts of emotional intelligence, just learning how to identify our own emotions and how to identify the emotions of others. We've defined emotional intelligence as the ability to recognize and regulate your own emotions, and also to recognize and regulate yourself around the emotions of others. And we've learned a lot, and we've been, the last couple of weeks, we're coming towards the end of this series, and starting last week we kind of stopped with the concepts of emotional intelligence in general, and we are now dealing with specific areas that require emotional intelligence. And if you remember last week we learned about conflict resolution, and we learned about the fact that whenever you put people together there's going to be conflict, and in order to be able to resolve those conflicts we need to be in tune with our emotions, the emotions of others, empathies, things of that nature. And this morning I'm dealing with a very specific subject, and it is the subject of gossip. And I'm dealing with gossip and with gossips and how to deal with that using emotional intelligence through the lens of emotional intelligence. Let me just say this by way of introduction. First of all, I have taught repeatedly over the years on this subject. In fact, pretty much this same outline that I'm preaching this morning is an outline that I've preached over the years. Obviously the outlines change and the sermons change from year to year, but I would say that over the last four or five years I've probably preached this sermon or a sermon like this probably once a year in the history of our church. And the reason is because it's needed. What I have learned is that people either don't get it or they forget it, so it's good to hear it again. And you don't have to turn here, you stay there in 1 Timothy 5 if you would, but I'll just read this verse for you. Philippians 3 and verse 1 says this, Finally my brethren rejoice in the Lord, to write the same thing to you to me indeed is not grievous, but for you it is safe. And oftentimes we need to hear these things over and over again, to write the same thing to you, to preach the same thing to you, to teach the same thing to you. For me indeed is not grievous, but for you it is safe, and if you're here this morning and you're thinking, well I don't know that this sermon applies to me, just know that gossip is a sin that infects everyone, has the ability, the possibility to infect everyone, and not only to infect everyone, but to infect everywhere. And like I said, I'm sometimes shocked because of course I'm a human being that tends to lean towards pride like every other human being does, so I have this idea that every word that I say is going to be remembered by all of you and that you're just all hanging on my every word and taking detailed notes. So then when I come across a situation where we're dealing with gossip, I'm always shocked because I think to myself, man, I've taught so much on this, I would think that you would know this, but like I said, either people forget it or they just don't get it to begin with and it's an issue that needs to be dealt with. Now let me just give you some thoughts regarding gossip as we begin and the first thought I've already given to you, and this is not a point, this is just by way of introduction, I want you to know this, that the sin of gossip can affect everyone. It can affect everyone. Now usually when we think of gossip and when people talk about gossip, gossip is often known as something that women struggle with and usually when jokes are made about gossip, it's always within the context of women liking to gossip or wanting to gossip and the Bible definitely speaks to this. Let me just turn to 1 Timothy chapter 5. If you look at verse number 13, 1 Timothy 5, 13, the Bible says, And withal they learn to be idle. And this is talking about, of course, a young widow and it says they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house, and here the apostle Paul is writing about women being careful about not being idle. The word idle means to be doing nothing, to accomplishing nothing, and he says that they withal learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house. Of course he's writing in the first century and he's talking about these women. Later on he'll use this word busybodies. They're not busy doing anything because they're idle but they're busy wandering from house to house and not only idle, notice these words, but tattlers also and busybodies and I want you to notice these words, speaking things which they ought not, speaking things which they ought not. Now of course in the first century, Paul is speaking about these idle women wandering about from house to house and that may be the case today. Today I would say that it probably has more to do with wandering about from social media posts to social media posts or social media site to social media site or text message to text message or phone call to phone call. This idea that we need to be careful and here specifically Paul is speaking to the ladies that they should be careful to not be idle wandering about from house to house. Being tattlers also and busybodies and I just want you to notice this phrase, the last part of verse 13, speaking things which they ought not. You know the Bible says there are some things that you should not say. There are some things that we should not speak about. It's just not something we need to speak about. The word tattler that he uses there is defined as a person who talks or tells secrets, tells tales. A busybody is a person who prize into or meddles into the affairs of others, trying to get information that is not necessarily something they need. You're there in 1 Timothy 5. Flip back if you would to 1 Timothy chapter 3. 1 Timothy chapter 3. Look at verse number 11. Here again the context is about ladies. This specifically is referring to the qualifications of a wife of a man who's going into ministry. 1 Timothy 3 and verse 11, the Bible says this, Even so must their wives be grave. The word grave there is in reference to being serious and then notice these words, not slanderers, sober, faithful in all things. The Bible here is admonishing ladies and wives to not be slanderers. A slanderer is a malicious, false, and injurious to reputation statement or report. It's a statement that injures somebody's reputation, that is malicious, and that is false. And I would say this, and I'm not really preaching on this this morning, but gossip and false accusations go hand in hand because of the fact that oftentimes when someone is gossiping, they are gossiping things that they don't really know whether they're true or not. They've not taken the time to investigate it or to even determine whether it's something they should be speaking about, and we'll speak more about that next week. But I want you to notice here that the ladies are told to be grave and not slanderers. So we see how gossip is often known as something that women struggle with. However, you're there in 1 Timothy 3, and I'd like you to go to 2 Thessalonians 3. This is all by way of introduction. If you go backwards, you're gonna go past 1 Timothy into the book of 2 Thessalonians, 2 Thessalonians 3, just in case you might think that, I'm picking on the ladies this morning, I'm preaching on gossip and speaking only to the ladies. Let me say this. Men struggle with gossip as well. I've seen some grown men act more like a bunch of hens, you know, spreading gossip than sometimes women do. 2 Thessalonians 3 and verse 11. This is a verse in reference to men. The Bible says, For we hear that there are some which walk among you disorderly, working not at all. Notice that the problem is always with not being about the work that you're supposed to be doing. It's always about being idle. God has given you a purpose to life. He's given you a reason to work at it every day instead of being idle. And here we talk about these men that are working not at all but are, notice the words, busybodies. This is, again, we saw this in reference to ladies that were gossiping, but here we're talking about men that are gossiping, and here Paul, and of course under the inspiration of the Holy Ghost, even calling men busybodies. Let me give you one last verse just by way of introduction. Go with me to the Old Testament book of Leviticus, Leviticus chapter 19. Of course, if you start in Genesis, you'll go past Exodus into the book of Leviticus, Leviticus chapter 19, and look at verse number 16, Leviticus 19 and 16. So we see that gossip is something that can affect everyone because it's not just something that affects women. Men as well engage in gossip and like to participate in gossip and to get all the juicy details of things that are not necessarily something they need to hear. The general commands all of us. He commands all of his people to abstain from gossip. Look at Leviticus 19 and verse 16. Here's a command from God. He says, thou shalt not go up and down as a tale bearer among thy people. He said, your job is not to go around spreading tales, spreading stories, spreading things. He says, thou shalt not go up and down as a tale bearer among thy people, neither shalt thou stand against the blood of thy neighbor. I am the Lord. And that tale bearer is a person who spreads gossip or secrets that may cause trouble or harm. And what I'd like to do this morning is I'd like to teach you from the Bible how you can avoid gossiping and how you can avoid engaging in gossip and becoming a gossip. And this is how I've taught it over the years. And this should sound familiar to you if you've been to our church for any length of time, but I've always tried to do my best to teach and preach the Word of God in such a way to make it memorable so that you can remember it, so that you can apply it to your lives and that you can teach it to others. And this is how I've taught it. You may or may not like it and I understand that and maybe I think that this, I came up with this phrase hoping that it would be helpful. I don't know if maybe it's confusing, but what I've taught people over the years in regards to gossip and what we should remember when we are engaging in a conversation is we should always ask ourselves these questions. Is it my place? Is it my problem? Is it my place? Is it my problem? And what I mean by that and what I've taught our church over the years is you must ask yourself this question. Is it my place? What do we mean by that? We mean is it your place of authority? Is it your place of biblical authority that God has given you to bring judgment upon? Or is it my problem? You say maybe it's not my place of authority, but it's affecting me. It's affecting my life. It's affecting my place of authority. It's affecting my family or my children. We should always ask ourselves this question. Is it my place? Is it my problem? Do I have a place of authority in regards to this matter or am I being affected? Is my family being affected in regards to this matter? And the reason that I'm preaching this in a sermon on emotional intelligence is because understanding when this phrase applies, is it my place? Is it my problem? By the way, you asked the question differently. When someone is bringing gossip to you and someone's gonna tell you something and you're not sure whether you should be listening to it or not, you should ask yourself is it my place? Is it my problem? Before you give a secret to someone or say something to someone and you're wondering should I be saying this to this individual, you should be asking yourself is it their place? Is it their problem? Am I bringing this to someone and am I bringing this story, this tale, this secret, this account to someone who has the place of authority to do something about it or is being affected by this? This is the question that we should ask ourselves and this should help you identify whether it's gossip or not. Now, my wife and I have always led this ministry in such a way where we try to have an open door policy and we're always open to you calling us or texting us or meeting with us or whatever it may be and I don't mind doing that but my goal is to help you grow spiritually so that you don't have to call me every time you're gonna have a conversation with somebody and ask me is this gossip? Now, for some of you, I'd appreciate if you did that because honestly, taking your phone call every 15 minutes is probably less work than the work you've created for me anyway with all your gossip. But the goal is for you to be able to identify yourself, for you to be able to identify yourself, is this my place? Is this my problem? Is this their place? Is this their problem? And here's what you need to understand is for you to know when this phrase applies and for you to have the discipline to implement it when it is required. That requires emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence is needed for you to be able to ask yourself before you hear something. Is this my place? Is it my place to hear this? Do I have the authority to even do anything about this? Is this my problem? Is this affecting me? Or before you say something, is it their place? Is it their problem? It requires emotional intelligence. It also requires understanding the areas of God-given authority. I have preached entire sermons on the subject of biblical authority and I'm going to write a sermon on biblical authority and listen to it, but let me just quickly explain it and the explanation is this, that God has given different areas of biblical authority. For example, in the home, the Bible says that the husband is the head of the wife. The husband is the authority in the home. Parents are the biblical authority of children. A husband is the biblical authority of a wife. Your boss is your biblical authority and my boss isn't even safe. Well, the Bible says that you are to work for your boss like you're working for Christ, as unto Christ, not with eye service as men-pleasers, but doing the will of God from the heart. So your boss, whoever your boss is, while he's your boss, while you're working for that individual, they are within the workplace your God-given authority. If you are a member of a church, within the scope of that church, the pastor is the God-given authority. You live in a nation of a country. You live in a country. The government is that God-given authority. Now, obviously, and again, I've preached entire sermons on this. There are limits to God-given authority, but within those limits, and as long as they're not asking you to sin, as long as your husband's not asking you to sin, ladies, or your parents are not asking you to sin, children, or your boss is not asking you to sin, employees, or your pastor's not asking you to sin, church members, or your government's not giving you authority, and we need to understand the concept of God-given authority, because if you don't even understand the concept of God-given authority, then you can't ask the question, is it my place? Because you don't even know what your place of authority is or isn't, or is it their place? So, obviously, that's something that needs to be understood. Now, let me just say this, and again, we're kind of still in the introduction. We're going to talk about Proverbs and also in the book of Psalms, so you can just find Proverbs and lose your place anywhere else. Find Proverbs chapter 11. We'll spend the sermon in Proverbs and in the book of Psalms. We're going to look at a lot of verses. Let me just say this. Gossip is not just something that affects churches, and if you're here, you're thinking, well, I don't know that this really is something I need. Listen, anywhere people gather, whether it's a church, it doesn't matter. Gossip, you gather people together, and you're going to deal with gossip. I was preparing for this sermon, and of course, I've been working on this concept, these concepts of emotional intelligence and what's going to be preached, what week, and writing these sermons and praying these thoughts, and as I was starting to prepare for this specific sermon on the subject of gossip, my wife and I were out, going to the grocery store and paying for these groceries, and there was a cashier, and there was a bagger, and these two lady employees, a cashier and a bagger, were sitting there, just right in front of us, just no shame, no nothing, just actively gossiping about the other cashier. I'm thinking to myself, do you think you wouldn't do this in front of a customer? And they're just like, well, it's not just our church. Apparently, it happens at grocery stores too. And the truth is this, anywhere you gather, and it was funny to me, because then the lady turns around and says something, and they're like, oh, hi. I'm like, you stinking hypocrites. You know what they were just saying about you? Whenever you gather people, you're going to deal with this concept of gossip. So I'm here to tell you, this is a sermon that applies to everyone. Don't sit here and say, oh, it's a concept of gossip. Gossip, let's begin with this. What is gossip? What is gossip? Because, and again, I tend to think that people are lying, because I tend to think that you're smarter than you let on. Because oftentimes as a pastor, my job is to confront people with situations and there's problems, and my job is to try to deal with these. And I'll go to someone and say like, now you know that was gossip. I didn't know that was gossip. Remember there, look at verse number 13. Proverbs chapter 11 and verse 13, the Bible says this, a tale bearer, remember a tale bearer is someone who tells tales. A tale bearer revealeth secrets. A tale bearer revealeth secrets, but he that is a faithful spirit concealeth the matter. Here the Bible tells us that, a tale bearer, by the way, is a biblical word for what we would call a gossip. You could say, revealeth secrets. Look at Proverbs 17 and verse 9. Proverbs chapter 17 and verse 9. You're there in Proverbs 11, just turn over to Proverbs 17 and verse 9. The Bible says, he that covereth the transgression seeketh love. Notice this phrase though, Proverbs 17, 9, he that covereth the transgression seeketh love, but he that repeateth a matter separateth very friends. So why don't you notice that in Proverbs 11, 13, we're answering the question, a tale bearer revealeth secrets. Proverbs 17, 9, but he that repeateth a matter separateth very friends. Go to Proverbs chapter 20, verse 19. Proverbs chapter 20, verse 19. Proverbs 20, 19 says this, Proverbs chapter 20, verse 19, he that goeth about as a tale bearer, look at it, revealeth secrets. He that goeth about as a tale bearer revealeth secrets, not with him that flattereth with his lips. The Bible says, he that goeth about as a tale bearer revealeth secrets, Proverbs 20, 19, but he that repeateth a matter separateth very friends, Proverbs 17, 9. A tale bearer revealeth secrets, Proverbs 11, 13. Go to Proverbs 25, real quickly, Proverbs 25 and verse 9. Proverbs 25 and verse 9. The Bible says this, debate thy cause with thy neighbor himself and, notice this phrase, discover not a secret to another. Discover not a secret to another. I want you to notice this word being used throughout here, secret. A tale bearer revealeth secrets, he that repeateth the matter separateth very friends. He that goeth about as a tale bearer revealeth secrets, debate thy cause with thy neighbor himself and discover not a secret to another. What does it mean when it's used in this word secret? The idea is that there are some things that other people don't need to know and when you take information to someone you don't need to know, you are revealing a secret. Now this is where it might get complicated and this is where I may be if I have failed as a pastor to teach this over the years and I guess this is where I would take responsibility and say that this is where I have failed but I just don't know how else to do it. I'm going to give you three statements to help you identify what gossip is and I'm going to tell you right now these statements are lengthy and they're complicated. I'm just with this subject I'm not able to do that so I'm going to give it to you and I'll give it to you several times and I would encourage you to write this down and this is how you can answer. Let's answer the question. What is gossip? What is gossip? You should know what gossip is so you know if you're hearing it, you know if you're engaging it, you know if you yourself are a gossip. What is gossip? Number one, gossip. The story you are telling, it is gossip if the issue you are discussing cannot be dealt with by you. What does that mean? It means you can't fix it. There's nothing you can do about it. Why? Because you do not have authority over it. Remember, is it my place? We asked the question, is it my place, is it my problem? Is it their place, is it their problem? It is gossip if the issue you are discussing cannot be dealt with by you or cannot be dealt with by the person you're speaking to because you do not have authority over it or if it's not affecting you or affecting the person that you are speaking to about it. Remember, is it my place, is it my problem? Is anybody in this conversation that we're having this conversation about this other person, is anybody here have the authority to deal with this problem or are they being affected by this problem? That's how you determine, is it gossip? What I'm telling to this person, do they have the authority to do something about this or are they being affected by it or when I'm receiving a tail, do I have the authority to do something about this or am I being affected by this? Now look, I don't think it's that complicated. I think some of you like to gossip and like to pretend like this is rocket surgery and like to pretend like it's more complicated than it needs to be but it's not that complicated. Is it my place? Is it his place? Is it her place? Is it my problem? Is it their problem? So let me give you an example and again, I've preached this many times. Let's say there's a problem in church between the teenagers and I use that just as an example and by the way, I've got teenagers, I used to preach this when I didn't have teenagers. It's just a common thing that happens in church. Let's say there's a problem between teenagers and you don't have any children or your children are not teenage. It would be gossip for you to go around and spread that information simply for the sake of spreading it because it's not your place. You don't have any teenagers that you have authority over. You don't have any teenagers that are being affected by it. Again, I don't think it's that complicated. Let me give you another statement. So statement number one, it is gossip if the issue you are discussing cannot be dealt with by you because you do not have authority over it. Is it my place? Or you are not affected by it. Is it my problem? Number two, it is gossip if the issue you are discussing has already been dealt with by those who have authority. Is it my problem? Do you understand what I just said? You said, what if I found out about something but it's already been dealt with? The authority has already been told or the person being affected by it has already been told. Well, then leave it alone. It's gossip if the issue you are discussing has already been dealt with by those who have authority over it or by those who are affected by it. And again, let me just give you a couple of examples. Let's say there is someone in our church and I find out, and this has never happened, glory to God, and pray it never happens because if you ever want to see me just be very upset this would do it. But let's say that someone in our church, let's say that I find out that someone in our church is actively committing adultery on their spouse and I find out about it. And by the way, if I find out about it, I mean there's lots of things I would do but it is not gossip for me to go to their spouse, whether it's a husband or a wife, and let them know about it. You say, why? Because the spouse is being affected by it. You understand that? Let's say a wife is committing adultery on her husband and I know about it. I find out about it. I go to the husband and I tell him because it's his area of authority. That's not gossip. Or a husband is committing adultery on their wife. And again, this has never happened in our church and praise the Lord for that. I go to the wife. You say, why? Because she's being affected by it. It's her problem. It is their place. It is their problem. That's not gossip. However, let's say someone's committing adultery and I find out about it. I would never do this but you find out about it and the people that it actually affects, they go to everyone else. They don't go to a husband that has the authority. Okay, let's talk about teenagers. You find out teenagers are doing something they shouldn't be doing or whatever and that's what teenagers do. And instead of going to the parents, because going to the teen's parent is not gossip because you're going to the person that has the authority to do something about it. Do you understand what I'm saying to you? It's not that complicated. Maybe I'm a genius. I don't think that's the case. I think some of you are playing dumb. I didn't know that was gossip. You didn't know it was gossip when you found out that a teenager was doing something they shouldn't be doing. You didn't go to the teen's parents but you went to everybody else and told them you didn't know that was gossip. It's not that complicated. It's not that complicated. I appreciate the compliments. You think I'm a genius Let's say, here's another example. Let's say somebody committed adultery in their past but it's came to light. It's been dealt with. Everyone in authority that needed to know knows. Everyone who is affected by it knows. The spouse knows. The pastor knows. They've gone to counseling. It's in their past. They've gotten past it. There's been forgiveness. There's been repentance. You don't have that. You say, why? Because it's already been dealt with. Everyone who needs to know already knows. The authority already knows. The spouse already knows. Do you understand what I'm saying to you? I don't think it's that complicated. I don't think it's just, there's words coming out but I cannot comprehend. Is it your place to do something about it? Is it their place to do something about it? Is it your problem? Are they being affected by it? Is it their problem? Are they being affected by it? If the answer is no and no, then shut your mouth because it's gossip. It's gossip if the issue you're discussing cannot be dealt with by you or the person you're speaking to because you do not have authority over it or if you're not being affected by it or the person you're speaking to, then it's gossip. It's gossip if the issue you are discussing has already been dealt with or the people affected by it have already been told, then it's gossip. All it is is you telling a secret, repeating a matter, being a tale bearer, telling tales. Number three, it is not gossip. So let me tell you when it's not gossip and I've already covered this but let me just give you the statement. It is not gossip when you're telling someone that has the authority over it. That's not gossip. And saying, hey, this is going on and you have the biblical authority. You're the head of the house here or you're the pastor of the church or you're the boss here or you're the one that's in charge. If you go to the authority, that's not gossip. Or if you're going to someone that's being affected, maybe they don't have the authority but it's hurting them. It's a sin against them or their family is being involved somehow. It's not gossip. Problem. Praise problem. As long as you can give the affirmative in one of those areas, it's not gossip. Why did you tell so-and-so about? Well, because it's their place of authority. Oh, okay. Why did you tell so-and-so about this situation? Well, because they were being affected by it. Okay. It's their place. It's their problem. Why did you tell this person about it? This random person had nothing to do about it. It's gossip. And again, I realize I'm not giving you short statements with alliteration and a poem at the end, but I don't think it should be that hard to comprehend. Is it your place? Is it your problem? Is it your place? Is it your problem? By the way, let me just say this. Seeking counsel from a pastor or pastor's wife is generally not gossip. And the reason for that is when it comes to Verity Baptist Church, in most cases, it is our place of authority and it is our problem. So you say, I really need to talk to somebody. Find your pastor. Find your pastor's wife. By the way, as a pastor, as a pastor's wife, we have certain things just by way of our job here. Similar to lawyers, we practice confidentiality. So we practice biblical confidentiality. We don't spread your issues or whatever to other people. So going to your pastor, your pastor's wife, if you really do have a question or concern or you really just are not getting it and you're like, I'm not sure what should be done here, generally speaking, going to your pastor or your pastor's wife, you're not gonna cross the lines of gossip. And if you do, we'll let you know. Hey, you don't need to be talking about that. Because when it comes to Verity Baptist Church, obviously, in most cases, it is our place of authority as the pastor, as the pastor's wife. And it is our problem because it affects our church. So look, honestly, if you have an actual question, you're like, I got this information. I'm not sure what I should do about it. You please come to us. But in order to manage yourself, just learn this phrase. Write it down somewhere. I'm against tattoos. The Bible's against tattoos. They're good. But some of you think tattoos are cool. So let me just give you my one permission. You wanna get a tattoo, tattoo this across your forehead. Is it my place? Is it my problem? So you can just be constantly reminded. And I still don't think tattoos are good, but at least that'll be a helpful one. Is it my place? Is it my problem? So what is gossip? It is gossip if the issue you're discussing cannot be dealt with by you because you do not have authority or if it's not affecting you or if the person you're speaking to does not have authority or it's not affecting them. It is gossip if the issue you are discussing has already been dealt with by those who have authority or by those who are affected by it. It is not gossip when you're telling someone that has authority over it or you're telling someone who's being affected by it. So again, we're not saying to a kid doing something they shouldn't be doing, go to their parents. A church member's engaging in behavior they should not be engaging. Go to their spouse if it requires that or their pastor. Go to the authority. Or if it's hurting someone or affecting someone, go to that individual. But we should always, and look, I'm telling you, as a pastor oftentimes, first of all, and some of you know this, my wife and I, we are, and it's funny how people are, they're trying to pry stuff out of you and we've just gotten really good at the awkward silence. People are just asking and we're just like, and they're like, and we're like, and then it gets real awkward because we're constantly funneling information through this lens. Is it their place? Is it their problem? Do they need to know this? That's the hardest question. And even for us when we're being told things, oftentimes I am funnel, we're telling people, hey, in this instance, this is actually not my place of authority, I don't need to know those details. Is it your place or your problem? What is gossip? Number two, let's talk about what is wrong with gossip. Okay, maybe you're like, okay, I have been playing dumb. I get it. It's not that hard. So what is wrong with gossip? Why should you not engage in gossip? Well, number one, and I am going to give you short statements now and illiterate it so you should be able to write these down and remember it. Gossip hurts reputations. Gossip hurts reputations. Proverbs 26, 22. If you would, look at Proverbs 26, 22. Notice these words. The words of a tale bearer are as wounds. The words of a tale bearer, remember a tale bearer is a gossip. The words of a gossip are as wounds. They go down into the innermost parts of the belly. The words of a tale bearer are as words. You say, why should I not engage in gossip? Because gossip hurts reputations. And you know what's funny is that people, they don't have emotional intelligence and they're like, I can't understand how this would hurt somebody else. And it's like, okay, remember empathy, but look, let's just, if you say, I don't get empathy. I just don't get it. Okay, well just flip it around. What if it was you? What if it was your secret? What if it was your whatever that's being told? And listen to me. Gossip hurts reputations. You say, what's wrong with it? It hurts reputations. It hurts people when something, first of all, let me just say it this way. It hurts people when something that is not true is being spread about them. That hurts people. And this is why I said that gossip often is coupled with false accusations because human tendency is, I got this juicy information. Have you told pastor? No. Well, he's the authority. Why don't you go to pastor? Have you talked to Ms. Joanne? No. I've talked to every other woman except Ms. Joanne. You know, you don't go to the person with authority. You don't go to the person that's actually being affected by it or the person that's actually engaging in it or whatever. So you don't have real information, verified information. What are you spreading? A bunch of assumptions. What are you spreading? A bunch of things that you don't even know if they're true and you're probably engaging in false accusations. And look, you may not care because your whatever is wrong with you. I don't know. You didn't get enough spanking as a child. But just know this. It hurts people when things that are not true is spread about them. And if that doesn't compute in your selfish brain, then just think of it this way. It hurts you when things that are not true are spread about you. Any selfish person can at least identify that. Would you like things spread about you that aren't true, that are half true, that have not been verified, that are not real? Would you like that spread? Well, if you wouldn't like it, then no one else would. Again, this whole emotional intelligence thing, I don't know that intelligence is the right word because it's not that complicated. It's just not. It hurts people when something that is not true is spread about them. By the way, let me say this. It hurts people when something that maybe is true or maybe is partially true but in their past but has already been dealt with has already came to light. It's already the authority knows, the pastor knows, their spouse knows, their parents know, whatever. It's already been dealt with and that gets spread. That hurts people. The words of a tale-bearer are as wounds. I remember when my wife and I were teenagers in a youth group. We had a youth pastor that would speak on the subject of gossip and he would often use this example. I've given you this example in the past. But he would say, when gossip spreads, it often cannot be taken back. And the worst part is when you spread things that aren't even true because you haven't taken the time, you don't have the character to even verify. And he would say, it's like taking one of those old down pillows. You know those old down pillows that were full of feathers? It's like taking an old pillow, down pillow full of feathers and going to downtown Sacramento and finding the highest sky rises, the highest tallest building going all the way to the roof and ripping that pillow apart and just spreading those feathers like the wind carried them and then trying to go back and pluck those feathers. So that would be impossible. It's often what happens with gossip. It's often what happens with gossip. And I found that usually the best way, if I can put it that way, to get people to quit church, once church discipline is involved, I've had situations where somebody was spreading gossip and I've asked them, tell me exactly who you told these false accusations. Well, I didn't know they were false. Well, you didn't verify them either. Who did you tell these false? And they'll give me a list. I'll say, well, here's the thing, and I'll say the same thing to them. It's like feathers. You can't go back and regain them because you told eight people and I've often told them, by the way, just in case you want to engage in gossip, just so you know how I'm going to deal with it, I've often told, and I've done this more than once and it's always been the same thing. I've told, well, you're going to go to those eight people and tell them, hey, I was wrong. I didn't verify that. I shouldn't have told you. I was gossiping and I'm sorry. So how many times that I've given that ultimatum to someone, did they actually do it? Up to this point, 13 years in ministry, not once. There's the door. I don't need gossips around here. And if you don't have the character and integrity to not tear down somebody's reputation or at least have the responsibility to go back and try to make it right, gossip hurts reputations. Number two, gossip hurts relationships. Gossip hurts relationships. You're there in Proverbs 26. Go to Proverbs 16. Proverbs 16, verse 28. Proverbs 16 and verse 28. Say, Pastor, you seem really upset. Wow, gossip. You know, what's frustrating about gossip to me is that it's all these self-inflicted wounds spread to all. And by the time, because my wife and I, by the way, you've heard me say this before, don't assume we know anything because another thing I've learned in ministry is that my wife and I will literally be the last people to know about anything. These people know! And it's like, great, thanks. Now I have to deal with this mess. When somebody just had the emotional intelligence to ask themselves a question, is it my places or my problem? Is it their places or their problem? Should I be talking to this person about it? So gossip hurts reputations, but number two, gossip hurts relationships. Proverbs 16, verse 28. A froward man soweth strife. Look at these words. And a whisper. And a whisper. And look, let me just say this. If you have to whisper about it, it's probably not good. If Pastor walks into a room or Mrs. Jimenez walks into a room, Ms. Joanne walks into a room, and all of a sudden you're like, and Pastor walks into a room. First of all, you're not that sly. Secondly, it's like, you're probably talking about something you shouldn't be talking about. My wife isn't God. Let me just let you in a little secret. Some of you are just going to be shocked by this. I'm not God. My wife isn't God. We walk into a room and be all, God bless you, sister. But you know what God's been listening in the whole time? God's been hearing your conversation the whole time. I can't discipline you like God can. So let me start being a little more worried about God and less worried about Pastor. Gossip hurts relationships. Proverbs 16 and 28, a froward man saw his strife and a whisperer, look at it, a whisperer separated chief friends. Why does a whisperer separate chief friends? Here's why. Because gossip hurts relationships. Gossip hurts relationships. You say, why should I not be involved in gossip? Because it hurts reputations and because it hurts relationships. And if your mind can't compete with that, then just ask yourself this. It'll hurt you if someone does it to you. So if you wouldn't like someone to do it to you, why would you do it to someone else? Go to Proverbs 17, look at verse nine. Proverbs 17, verse nine. Proverbs 17 and verse nine. He that covered the transgressions seeketh love. Look at these words. But he that repeateth a matter separated very friends. Gossip hurts relationships. He that repeateth a matter. By the way, let me just say this. You know what the worst type of gossip? I mean, all gossip is bad. You know what the worst, I mean, just the absolute worst type of gossip? Gossip hurts relationships. The absolute worst type of gossip is the kind of gossip that leaves you speculating. That's just the worst. You know, the ultra spiritual. Well, I'm not going to tell you what's going on in their marriage, but let me just tell you, pray for them because their marriage, it's bad. It's bad. And it's like, it's not even that big of a deal. But you know, people always assume the worst. Speculation never goes positive. By the way, just realize this. Just realize this. People always telling you something. People usually like to leave things vague when they understand. Look, they're not going to leave it vague when the details are horrifying. You understand what I'm saying to you? If the details are horrifying, if it's like, let me tell you something. She killed her husband, cut his head off, buried it in the backyard. If those are the details, they're going to tell you that because that's like, whoa. If they're like, well, I'm not going to tell you. But I'm not going to tell you. They're probably not telling you because they know that the details are not that impressive. And they'd rather your mind run with whatever story, like, I can't believe that they did. Speculation never goes positive. Never. No one ever leaves you speculating. You're like, oh, I'm sure it's no big deal. It's always like, I'm sure that they're probably. The worst type of gossip is the kind of gossip you're speculating. Well, I'm not going to give you all the details. Well, why not? I mean, if you're in gossip, why aren't you going to give me all the details? Is it because the details are not that impressive? Because if I heard all the details of the story, I wouldn't side with you? Because if I understood all the details that would actually make you look bad, is that why you're not telling me all the details? That's the question you should be asking. Well, I'm not going to give you all the details once he did something really bad. What, he killed somebody? I was like, what? Speculation never goes positive. And people that are professional gossips, they know that. But it's Psalm 101. Psalm 101. You know the best way to live your life is to live it in the light. The Bible says that men love darkness rather than light because their deeds are evil. The best way to live your life is to live it in the light. And I tell people like, look, I'm going to practice Biblical confidentiality. I'm not going to give people's information or whatever, but I've got nothing to hide. You want all the details to come out? You want all the story to come out? It can. Obviously, we shouldn't live our lives that way. Psalm 101.5. Who so privately slandereth his neighbor? Privately slandereth his neighbor. If he's telling you something about someone, the first question you should ask yourself, or the first question you should ask them is, have you talked to them about that? Oh, no. And look, I realize that this requires emotional intelligence, spirituality. It requires a lot of things that maybe some of you don't have. But you know, the proper response, someone comes to you and says, let me tell you something about Pastor Jimenez. You know what the proper response is? Hey, yeah, let's go talk to Pastor Jimenez about this. Let me tell you something about Sister So-and-so. Let's go talk to Sister So-and-so about this, because who so privately slandereth his neighbor? God says, him will I cut off. Him that hath an high look and a prudent heart will not I suffer. Slander is a malicious, false or injurious statement or report. Again, I've already said it, but things you need to hide and whisper about or keep from authority are wrong. If somebody's telling you, don't tell Pastor this, but it's already wrong. Don't tell Pastor this, but it's already wrong. It's already wrong. Jack Howell said this. I can look at my people and spot the ones who have been listening to poison, referring to gossip. Their spiritual joy is gone and I can see it in their faces. That's what Jack Howell said about his congregation. It's not. It's pretty obvious when you've been listening to gossip. It makes you an angry, bitter person. Gossip is wrong. You should not engage in it because gossip hurts reputations and gossip hurts relationships. Number one, we talked about what is gossip. It is gossip if the issue you're discussing cannot be dealt with by you because you do not have the authority over it. Is it by place? Or you are not affected by it. Is it my problem? It is gossip if the issue you are discussing has already been dealt with by those who have authority over it. Is it my place? Or by those who are affected by it. Is it my problem? It is not gossip when you are telling someone who has the authority over it, is it their place? Or you are telling someone who's being affected by it, is it their problem? What is wrong with gossip? Number three, let's talk about how you should deal with gossip. How you should deal with gossip. First, let's talk about how to deal with gossip and then let's talk about how to deal with gossips. The act and the individual. How to deal with gossip. Again, not that complicated. Go to Proverbs 11 if you would. I think you're in Psalms. Go back to Proverbs 11. If you cannot deal with what you're being told, you can't deal with it. You can't fix it. You can't do anything about it. Either because it's already been dealt with by those who have authority over the matter, or because the people that were affected by it have already been told. If you can't deal with it because it's not your place, it's not your problem, and the person who it is their place and it is their problem then what do you do? You just refuse to listen to it. Do not listen to it. You say, well, I already heard it. Then don't repeat it. Practice some discipline and don't repeat it. Proverbs 11, 13. A tale bearer reveal his secrets. Look at these words. But he that is of a faithful spirit concealeth the matter. He that is of a faithful spirit concealeth the matter. Proverbs 17, 9. He that covereth a transgression seeketh love. He that covereth a transgression seeketh love. The Bible says he that is of a faithful spirit concealeth the matter. He that covereth a transgression seeketh love. You know that there are some things that we should try to cover and conceal. Now, look, and please, you need to understand this. I'm not talking about sweeping sin under the rug or covering things up. If the people that are affected have already been told, if everyone who needed to be told has already been told, you understand that you don't need to know everything about everyone. Not everything needs to be dealt with publicly. I've often talked through the years sins that are performed publicly should be dealt with publicly. Sins that are performed privately should be dealt with privately. And if the parents have already been told, if everybody involved has already been told, the spouse has already been told, then what do we need to tell you? Who are you? You're sleeping things under the rug. I recently had somebody say, you're sleeping things under the rug. And I told this individual, do not use terms that you do not understand. Because there are some things that need to be concealed. You don't need to know about someone's individual power. If everyone that needs to know has been told, if it's been told, if it's been dealt with, you don't need to know. Is it your problem? Then why do we need to tell you? Obviously, we're not talking about public sins. If a pastor is committing adultery, then that needs to be dealt with publicly. If a pastor is stealing money from the church, that needs to be dealt with publicly. Do you understand that? But if you were doing something wrong and it's been dealt with, we don't need to tell the whole world that. It doesn't matter. He that covered the transgression seeketh love. And you as a mature, emotionally mature, spiritually mature individual should have enough sense to say, hey, if it's been dealt with, if the authority knows, the people affected know, there's nothing I can do about it, I'm going to conceal this. I don't need to repeat the matter. How do you deal with gossip? You don't listen to it. And look, don't ever say these words in my presence. If you don't know what you're talking about, sweep under the rug, you better know what you're talking about because I will flip out on you because that's an accusation against me, against me and my ministry. Somebody said that to me recently. I'm like, how in the world is a sweep? What do you have to do with this? You're no one. You don't need to be told everything about everyone. You don't need to have every... wanting every juicy detail. Your soap opera mind that wants to know all the filth of everyone's past, get right with God. How do you deal with gossip? Don't listen to it. Don't repeat it. And if you're taking it to the authority, and by the way, if you're taking it to the authority and the authority said, this is a nothing burger, there's nothing here, sorry, you're wrong, you just have to realize that not everything you think is correct. If you don't have all the details and you don't have all the story, go to Proverbs 25, 9. You say, okay, but what if I heard something and I can deal with it? I do have authority. It is my place of authority or it does affect me. Then how do I deal with it? Glad you asked. Proverbs 25, 9. Look at this phrase. Debate thy cause with thy neighbor himself. Debate thy cause with thy neighbor himself. Look, you say, well, I heard this information and I need to deal with it. I actually have the authority to deal with it. It's actually affecting me or whatever. It is my place, it is my problem. It is their place, it is their problem. Okay, well then here's what you do. You deal with it and you only involve the authority to deal with it. You don't need to go and tell every other person. People have nothing to do with the situation. That's gossip. You involve those who have the authority and those who it affects. Is it my place? Is it my problem? It's really not that complicated. Debate thy cause with thy neighbor himself. Debate thy cause with thy neighbor himself. Go to the person that it affects. Go to the person with the authority. You say, how about, that's how to deal with gossip. How do you deal with gossip? If it's not your place, it's not your authority. If it's not your place, it's not your problem, you don't listen to it. You already heard it, you don't repeat it. If it is your place and it is your problem, then you deal with it and you only involve the people that need to be involved. Again, we're not talking about covering things up. Tell the authority. Tell the people that need to be told. But don't tell everyone. People don't need to know, they don't need to know. Now let's talk about how to deal with gossips. How to deal with gossips. Proverbs 25, 23. Proverbs 25, 23. The Bible says, the north wind driveth away rain. Look at it. So doth an angry countenance the backbiting tongue. You say, if someone's going to bring gossip to me, what would I do? Give them an angry countenance. Just an angry look. I don't know how to do that. The way you guys look at me while I'm preaching. People keep trying to get me to get big screens here and I almost want to do it. The only thing that I would want to do, the only caveat is I'm going to install these big screens but I'm just going to have it show your guys' faces while I'm preaching. You don't know what an angry countenance looks like? Just look at your face while I'm preaching at you. So doth an angry countenance a backbiting tongue. You say, why should I be angry with the gossip? Listen to me very carefully. If you get nothing out of this sermon, just get this. Mark it down. Just mark it down. If they will gossip to you, they will gossip about you. If they will gossip, no, no, no, no. They're loyal to me. They're only talking crap. No, no, no, no, no. They're loyal to no one. If they will gossip to you about someone, if they will tell you information you do not need to know about someone, they will tell your information to someone that doesn't need to know. Just mark it down. If they'll gossip to you, they'll gossip about you. That's why you should not put up with gossip because if they'll gossip to you, they'll gossip about you. And when it wasn't about you, it was fun. And when it wasn't about you, it was interesting. And when it wasn't about you, it was, oh wow, I can't believe really. But all of a sudden, when it's about you, now it hurts and it's mean and it's cruel and it's not fair and it's not right. You know what that's called? Emotional intelligence. When they did it to you, it was mean and not right and they shouldn't do it and they shouldn't get away with it, I can't believe. But wait a minute, when you sat there and heard it about everybody else, it was that same thing to all those people. Just mark it down. If they'll gossip to you, they will gossip about you. Go to Proverbs 26, 20 and we'll be done. We'll be done right here. Proverbs 26, verse 20. Where no wood is, there the fire goeth out. Where no wood is, there the fire goeth out. Isn't that pretty self-explanatory? There's no wood in the fire, it's going to go out. So where there is no tail-bearer, the strife ceaseth. Where there is no tail-bearer, the strife ceaseth. When we learn to deal with gossip and gossips, there'll be less problems. Look, there'll be less problems in your life. And again, let's just go back to where we started. Remember the word idle? Busy body? You know the best way, because look, human flesh wants to hear all these juicy details and get all this stuff. So how do you deal with that? Get busy about the work that God has given you to do. Honestly, like, I'm shocked. I mean, some of you are addicted to your phones and social media. It's shocking to me. I mean, I'm thinking to myself, like, you're here. Like, you're here at church. I'm talking about you walk into church and sit down and it's just like. Before the service, during the service, while I'm preaching. I'm thinking to myself, if you're like this at church, good night. You got problems. I mean, I'm just not, you know, that's a sermon for another day. A sermon that will shortly be preached. You know what? I'm not on social media and I'm not. I don't, I have things to do. I believe that there are things that God has given me and my wife to do with our lives. And I just don't have four hours. That's ridiculous. If you've got four hours to spend doing that, you need to get some, you need to get a life. I'm not saying that in a mean way. I'm trying to help you here. You need to get a vision for your life. Stop wasting your life! God gave you breath and God gave you talent. God gave you energy. God gave you children. He gave you a spouse. He gave you a church. Do something. Stop being a busybody. Do something with your life. Because somebody says, hey, you want to sit down for three hours and talk about people? No. Actually, no, I don't. I really don't. Like, I've got things to do. Where no wood is, there the fire goeth out. So where there is no tail bearer, the strife ceases. When we learn to deal with gossip and gossips, there'll be less problems in your life. Less drama. So to help you avoid gossip, you should remember this. In fact, write it on your forehead. Is it my place? Is it my problem? Is it my place? Is it my problem? Is it my place of authority? Can I do something about this situation? Is it my problem? Am I being affected? Are the people under my authority being affected? Is it my place? Is it my problem? If the answer is yes, the affirmative in either one of those is that it's not gossip. I'm going to tell this person, is it their place? Is it their problem? If the answer is affirmative in any of those questions, then it's not gossip. But if the answer is no, it's not my place. There's nothing I can do about it. It's not my problem. It's not affecting me or the people under my authority. It's not their place. There's nothing they can do about it. It's not their problem. It's not affecting them in any way, shape, or form. Then it's gossip. And you should close your mouth. Let's bow our heads and have a word of prayer. Heavenly Father, Lord, we love you. And Lord, I understand that it takes a spiritual person. It takes a spiritual person. To say, I don't want to do something to others that I wouldn't want done to myself. Lord, I pray you'd help us to get there. Because gossip hurts people. It hurts reputations. It hurts relationships. When we're on the receiving end of it, when we're the ones being hurt, it makes us feel clear how wrong it is. But help us to have that clarity when we're doing it to others. Help us to remember these words. Is it my place? Is it my problem? In the matchless name of the Lord Jesus Christ, we pray. Amen. We're going to have Brother Matt come up and lead us in a final song. I just want to remind you of a couple of things. First of all, don't forget that if you would like to sign up to help with the Red Hot Preaching Conference, you've got nothing to do because you're doing a lot of this, then sign up here and we'll give you something to do and we would appreciate your help with that. I do want to encourage you to be back tonight at 6 p.m. for the evening service. I'm not preaching about gossip, so you should be safe there. We're going to be in our numbers series. We're going to be looking at the wilderness wanderings of the children of Israel. Of course, we'd love for you to join us. Just one more opportunity to be in God's house with God's people on the preaching of the Word of God. If there's anything we can do for you, please let us know. We'll have Brother Matt come up and lead us in a final song. Turn to song 356. 356 on the first. I must tell Jesus all of my trials I cannot bear these burdens alone In distress He kindly will help me He ever loves and cares for His own I must tell Jesus, I must tell Jesus I cannot bear my burdens alone I must tell Jesus, I must tell Jesus Jesus can help me, Jesus alone I must tell Jesus all of my troubles He is a kind, compassionate friend If I but ask Him, He will deliver Make up my troubles, break me in heaven I must tell Jesus, I must tell Jesus I cannot bear my burdens alone I must tell Jesus, I must tell Jesus Jesus can help me, Jesus alone Tempted and tried, I need a great Savior One who can help my burdens to bear I must tell Jesus, I must tell Jesus Be all my cares and sorrows will share I must tell Jesus, I must tell Jesus I cannot bear my burdens alone I must tell Jesus, I must tell Jesus Jesus can help me, Jesus alone Oh how the world to evil allures me Oh how my heart is tempted to sin I must tell Jesus, and He will help me Over the world of hatred to fear I must tell Jesus, I must tell Jesus I cannot bear my burdens alone I must tell Jesus, I must tell Jesus Jesus can help me, Jesus alone Amen. Good singing. Before we leave here, if anybody has questions about salvation, church membership, or baptism, the pastor will be at the door. He'd love to talk to you or direct you to someone who's trained to talk to you about that. Ask Brother Johnny who's in close prayer for us. Amen. Amen. Amen.