(Disclaimer: This transcript is auto-generated and may contain mistakes.)

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["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] 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["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] ["In the Hall of the Mountain King"] Amen. We want to welcome you to Verity Baptist Church this morning. We're so glad that you are with us and, of course, would like to begin the service with a word of prayer. Let's go ahead and bow our heads together and pray together. Heavenly Father, Lord, we do thank you for allowing us to gather together this morning. Lord, we pray that you would bless the service, Lord, and we ask that you would meet with us today. We pray that today would not just be a normal Sunday like every other week, but that your Holy Spirit would meet with us, Lord, that you would speak to us through the singing, the preaching, the fellowship, and that we might draw closer to you. We love you. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. Turn to song 374. 374. Send the light. 374. Let's sing it out on the first. There's a call comes ringing. Oh, the restless way. Send the light. Send the light. There are souls to rescue. There are souls to save. Send the light. Send the light. Send the light, the blessing gospel. From shore to shore. Send the light, the blessing gospel. Let it shine forevermore on the second. We have heard the Macedonian call today. Send the light. Send the light. And at golden I forget the cross we lay. Send the light. Send the light. Send the light, the blessing gospel. Let it shine from shore to shore. Send the light, the blessing gospel. Let it shine forevermore. Let us pray that grace may everywhere abounds. Send the light. Send the light. And the Christ-like spirit everywhere be found. Send the light. Send the light. Send the light, the blessing gospel. Let it shine from shore to shore. Send the light, the blessing gospel. Let it shine forevermore. Good. On the last. Let us not grow weary in the work of love. Send the light. Send the light. Let us gather jewels for a crown above. Send the light. Send the light. Send the light, the blessing gospel. Let it shine from shore to shore. Send the light, the blessing gospel. Let it shine forevermore. Good. Amen. All right. Well, let's take our bulletins. We'll look at some announcements real quickly this morning. If you do not have a bulletin, just raise your hand and one of our ushers can get one for you. If you need a bulletin, just put your hand up and we will get one for you. Proverbs 18, 24, a man that hath friends must show himself friendly. And there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother. And that's a good verse there. We like that. If you open up your bulletin, you'll see our service time is Sunday morning service 10 30 a.m. We're glad that you're with us, of course, on Sunday morning on the Lord's day for church. We do invite you to be back tonight for the evening service at 6 p.m. And the evening service is different than the morning service, different songs that are sung, different sermon that's preached. Just one more opportunity to be in God's house with God's people on the preaching of the word of God. So we'd love you to join us, of course, for Sunday evening. And then, of course, our Wednesday evening Bible studies at 7 p.m. And it's our midweek service. We call it the most encouraging service of the week. And it's a time to just in the middle of the week to be able to get with God's people again and be refreshed, of course, with the word of God. If you look at our soul winning times, our main soul winning time is on Saturday mornings at 10 a.m. And then we have additional soul winning times on Thursdays and on Sundays at 2 p.m. So if you'd like to go soul winning, there'll be an opportunity for you to be able to do so this afternoon. And soul winning, of course, is when we go out in the community, we knock doors, we invite people to church, and we preach the gospel to anyone who is interested. If you're a first time guest, if it's your first time here at Verity Baptist Church, we're so glad that you are with us. And we have a gift we'd like to give you as you walk out of the church building this morning. If you go out our main foyer there, you'll see a little table set up. And on that table, you'll see these little gift bags. Please grab one on your way out as a gift from us to you for being our guest this morning. There are several resources in this bag that we'd like you to have. The one I'd like to highlight is this documentary that our church made. It's called Being Baptist. It's very well made, very interesting. We think you'll like it. And we wanted to give this to you as a gift. So please make sure you don't leave here this morning without grabbing one of the gift bags on your way out. And if you are a guest, we'd ask that you please take a moment to fill out the communication card which is inserted in your bulletin. If you need a pen, just raise your hand and one of our ushers can bring you by a Verity Baptist Church pen. And you're welcome to keep the pen, of course, as a gift from us as well. We're not going to do anything odd with your information. We're not going to sell it to anybody or anything like that. We would like to have a record of attendance. We actually would like to send you a little gift, but we need your information to do that. So please take a moment to fill the card out. When we're done with the announcement, we're going to sing a song. When we're done singing, we're going to receive the offering. And as the offering plate goes by, you can drop this card in the offering plate. Or you can hand it to me after the service. I'll be standing at the main door greeting people on the way out. I hope you'll come by and say hello. If you look at the bulletin there, of course, we are a family integrated church. What that means is that children and infants are always welcome in the service. We do not separate children from their parents for any reason. We do have mother-baby rooms and daddy rooms available for your convenience. All of the rooms have comfortable seating. They have monitors set up or windows set up. So you can watch the service and listen to it. So if you have a child that's been distracted during the service or if you need some privacy, we would encourage you to use those rooms as needed. If you need to be baptized, please let us know. We'd love to baptize you. If you check off on your communication card on the back that you'd like information about baptism, we'll follow up with you. We'll talk with you. We'll get that all set up so that you can be ready for baptism whenever it's convenient for you. And if you look at the announcements and upcoming events, of course, the big announcement right now is for this coming Sunday is going to be Mother's Day, of course. And we've got all sorts of events lined up for Mother's Day weekend. First of all, we want all the ladies to know that you are invited to an elegant afternoon tea in honor of Mother's Day this Saturday, May 11th at 3 p.m. And this is a beautiful event that my wife puts on for the ladies. And we want you to know that you're invited and we'd love for you to be a part of it. If you've not yet signed up, you can do so on your communication card on the back of the card. You can check off that you'd like to attend the ladies' tea. Let us know how many people are coming just so we can be prepared for you. And, of course, there'll be fellowship, there'll be food, there'll be preaching, and then a gift basket that'll be raffled off as well. So please make sure you sign up on your communication card. And if you'd like to help with the ladies' tea, if you'd like to volunteer, there are some volunteer opportunities in the foyer. There are clipboards set up and you can sign up to help wash teacups, decorate, serve tea, help clean up afterwards. We could use all sorts of help with all of that. So please make sure that you go by there if you'd like. And then the next day after that, which is next Sunday, May 12th, of course, is Mother's Day. And we're going to have a special Mother's Day service. We want to encourage you to be here, bring your mother, or if you're a mother, bring your children with you. And we're going to have, of course, special music from the children's choir. They'll be singing in honor of Mother's Day. And then we're also going to have a gift for all the ladies, not just mothers, but all the ladies. Girls all the way up will have the Verdi Baptist Church T-shirts, the ladies' T-shirts that will be given out as a gift next Sunday. So make sure you're here for that in the morning service. Choir practice, the children's choir, they're practicing today at 5.15 p.m. in the playroom. And then adult choir, they've got practice today at 5 p.m. here in the auditorium. And they're practicing, of course, for the upcoming Red Hot Preaching Conference. Homeschool group, they've got PE class this Thursday, May 9th at 10 a.m. And then there's other things there for you to look at. Ladies' weight loss accountability group, if you'd like to be a part of that. My wife leads that group at 6.15 p.m. on Wednesday nights in her office. And please don't forget to turn your cell phones off or place them on silent during the service. They're not a distraction to anybody. If you look at the back of the bulletin, birthdays and anniversaries for the month of May. This week we have Ms. Carol Young's birthday on May 9th. Joshua Gasalem II has a birthday on May 9th as well. Ms. Jackie Otoo has a birthday on May 10th. And then Brother Luis and Ms. Anna Mendoza have an anniversary this week on May 11th. Praise Report, Money Matters, all of those things are there for you to look at. And I think that's it for all of the announcements. So we're going to go ahead and we're going to sing the chorus of the week, which is the insert in your bulletin. If you'll go ahead and pull that out. And we're going to sing, Lord, I need you, as we prepare to receive the offering this morning. And let's go ahead and sing it out on the first. My anxious voice cries upward, with words you long to hear. Lord, I need you. When the sea of life is calm, oh, Lord, I need you. When the wind is blowing strong, whether trials come or cease, keep me always on my knees. Lord, I need you. Lord, I need you. Good singing. Let's sing it out on the second. Lord, help me to remember. Weak but you are strong. I cannot sing apart from you. For, Lord, you are my song. Although I'm prone to wander and boast in all I do, Lord, keep my eyes turned upward so I depend on you. Here we go. Sing it out. Lord, I need you. When the sea of life is calm, oh, Lord, I need you. When the wind is blowing strong, whether trials come or cease, keep me always on my knees. Lord, I need you. Lord, I need you. Amen. Good singing. We'll have the guys come up and help us with the offering at this time. Let's go ahead and bow our heads and have a word of prayer. Heavenly Father, Lord, we truly do need you. And, Lord, we ask that you would meet with us today. We pray for this offering. We pray that you'd bless the gift and the giver. We pray that you'd bless the time set aside for the preaching of your word. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. Amen. Amen. Amen. Amen. Amen. Amen. Amen. Turn your Bibles to 2 Timothy, chapter 3. 2 Timothy, chapter 3. If you do not have a Bible, raise your hand, and an usher will bring you one. 2 Timothy, chapter 3. We will read the entire chapter as our custom. 2 Timothy, chapter 3. Just keep your hands up. An usher will bring you a Bible. 2 Timothy, chapter 3, the Bible reads, This know also that in the last days perilous times shall come, for men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, believers, heady, high-minded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God, having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof, from such turn away. For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive, silly women laden with sins, led away with diverse lusts, ever learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth. Now as Janus and Jambres withstood Moses, so do these also resist the truth, that men of corrupt minds reprobate concerning the faith. But they shall proceed no further, for their folly shall be manifest unto all men, as theirs also was. But thou hast fully known my doctrine, manner of life, purpose, faith, longsuffering, charity, patience, persecutions, afflictions, which came unto me at Antioch, at Iconium, at Lystra, what persecutions I endured. But out of them all the Lord delivered me, and all that will live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution. But evil men and seducers shall wax worse and worse, deceiving and being deceived, but continue thou in the things that thou hast learned and hast been assured of, knowing of whom thou hast learned them, and that from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus. All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works. Let's pray. Lord God Almighty, thank you for this day. Thank you for this opportunity to come together. Please bless Pastor in the message. Please let it bring glory and honor to you. In the name of Jesus Christ I pray, Amen. Amen. Alright, we're there in 2 Timothy chapter number 3. And of course, this morning we are continuing in our Sunday morning series. We've been spending several weeks now on this subject of emotional intelligence. We've been learning about emotional intelligence through the word of God. We've been learning how to biblically raise your EQ. And if you remember, we've been looking at all sorts of different concepts. And we began with a sermon on the subject of dumb emotions. And we learned about the fact that emotional intelligence is our ability to recognize and regulate ourselves and our own emotions, and also to recognize and regulate ourselves around the emotions of others. And when we don't do that, and we allow our emotions to lead us, then we make dumb choices because our emotions are dumb. They're not logical. I don't need to know you and you don't need to know me to know this about you and you can know this about me that we were the masterminds behind the stupidest decisions we've ever made. And whatever regrets you have in life, you were the mastermind behind those regrets. And it has to do with the fact that you allowed your emotions to lead you. I've allowed my emotions to lead me. So we're learning about emotional intelligence. And we learned in the second week about awareness of self. And we have to begin there knowing our own emotions. To be self-aware, you must examine yourself. To examine yourself, you must not lie to yourself. To not lie to yourself, you must consider that you may be wrong. And we talked about how to examine and be aware of your emotions. And then in the third week, we learned about awareness of others. And really, that can all be wrapped up in this one word, empathy. And we learned about the fact that sympathy is feeling for others. Empathy is feeling with others. And then, of course, if you remember last week, we learned about awareness of context. Awareness of context. And being aware of the situation and the settings we find ourselves in. And we talked about perceiving people, comprehending conditions. And then, of course, acting accordingly. These are the things we've learned so far in emotional intelligence. I hope that you've been with us. If you've missed any of those sermons, I encourage you to check those out on our website. But this morning, we're going to look at this idea of social skills. Emotional intelligence and social skills. Or specifically, emotionally intelligent social skills. And you don't have to go very far. In fact, all you really need to do is find a local drive-through anywhere near you and go through the drive-through. And you'll understand that we live in a society today that lacks social skills. And social skills are a skill that is disappearing from our society. And the Bible says this. In fact, you're there in 2 Timothy, chapter 3. I'd like you to look at verse number 1. The Bible says this. This know also that in the last days, perilous times shall come. And by the way, we're in the last days. The time that we find ourselves in is what the Bible refers to as the last days. And I want you to notice what the Bible says about the society you and I find ourselves in. The culture we find ourselves in. Look at verse 2. For men shall be lovers of their own selves. Isn't that true? We live in a selfie society. We live in a selfish society. We live in a society of social media. Where everything is about ourselves and promoting ourselves. For men shall be lovers of their own selves. I don't know that there's ever been a society in human history that has loved themselves more. That has taken more pictures of themselves. And of course filtered them and edited them so that they don't actually look like you. But we live in a society today that is really, you could characterize as being lovers of their own selves. Covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, without natural affection, truce breakers, false accusers, incontinent, fears, despisers of those that are good, traitors, heady, high-minded, lovers of pleasure more than lovers of God. This is the society we find ourselves in. And these should not be the characteristics that define a Christian. They should not be the characteristics that define an individual that has emotional intelligence. And I believe that if you follow the skills, if you follow the teaching of the word of God, you would develop emotional intelligence. So what I'd like to do this morning is I'd like to give you some skills. I'd like to teach you, in fact, six different skills, and we call them social skills, we could call them attributes or characteristics that will help you in life. And look, what I want you to consider this morning as we go through these things is you ought to ask yourself, do I have this characteristic in my life? Can this be something that is said of me? And if not, then you ought to actively decide to work on it. You ought to decide that these are things that you want to characterize you. And here's what I'm telling you, if you learn these, if you internalize them, if you make them a part of your lifestyle, a part of your habits, they will make you a better person, they will help you have better relationships, and they will help you have a better life. So I'd like to give you six thoughts this morning, six attributes regarding emotionally intelligent social skills. And look, you should be striving, and I should be striving, to have these characteristics in our lives. And I'll just give them to you as an outline, I'll give you a list of six, we'll go through the Word of God and look at these together. And if you're taking notes, and I always encourage you to take notes on the back of your course, the week there's a place for you to write down some notes, or maybe you have a notebook or something. The first thing I'd like to bring to your attention, or the first characteristic skill that I'd like you to be aware of, that I think all of us should work on, is entitled authenticity. Authenticity. And in fact, we find this concept here again in our chapter, 2 Timothy chapter 3, if you look at verse number 10, I want you to notice what the Apostle Paul says here to his mentoree here, Timothy. Now of course, he began the chapter by talking about the characteristics, the skills of people in the last days, lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters. Again, you don't have to go, just go on any social media platform, go on YouTube, you'll find boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient. These are the things that characterize people that lack emotional intelligence, but I want you to notice how the Apostle Paul describes himself, 2 Timothy 3, 10. He says to Timothy, but thou has, notice these words, fully known. He says, thou has fully known my doctrine, manner of life, purpose, faith, long suffering, charity, patience, and he goes on to give other characteristics there. But I want you to notice that the Apostle Paul is telling Timothy, he says, Timothy, you know that I have been an open book. He said, you know that I have not hid anything from you. He says, you have fully known, you know my doctrine, you know what I believe, you know my manner of life or my lifestyle, how I live my life, you know my purpose, you know my faith. He says, you have known me. And what the Apostle Paul is talking about here, he's talking about the fact that he was an individual that was authentic, that practiced authenticity. And in my life and in your life, if we're going to have emotional self-intelligence, if we're going to be individuals that are aware of ourselves, aware of others, aware of context, then this is something that we must strive for, authenticity. Now let me give you a description of authenticity. And I'll be reading some from an excerpt, obviously I'll be reading from the Word of God, but I also have a book here that I'll be taking some excerpts from. And this is a book entitled, I've been reading to you from it throughout this series. This one is called Emotion and Intelligent Leadership. And here's how they describe authenticity. Authenticity is being transparent and trustworthy. Authenticity is about developing credibility, being transparent and aligning words with actions. Emotionally intelligent leaders live their lives and present themselves and their motives in an open and honest manner. When we talk about authenticity, we're talking about living your life in an open and honest manner. That's transparency. That's what the Apostle Paul is saying there in 2 Timothy 3, 10. I've fully known my doctrine, manner of life, purpose, faith, long suffering, charity, patience. He says, I have been transparent. And authenticity has to do with this idea of being transparent. What does that mean? Because we're not hiding anything. It means we're not trying to put on, we're not being hypocrites. We're not trying to put on a show and try to feign ourselves to be something that we're not. But we're being transparent with people. You're there in 2 Timothy 3, go with me if you would to the Old Testament book of Proverbs. Proverbs chapter 25. If you open your Bible just right in the center, you'll more than likely fall in the book of Psalms. And right after Psalms, you have the book of Proverbs. Psalms, then Proverbs, Proverbs chapter 25. When you get there, do me a favor, put a ribbon or a bookmark or something there because we're going to leave it and we're going to come back to it. And I'd like you to get to it quickly, Proverbs chapter 25. And let me just say this, transparency is not about putting all your drama out there. That is not what we're talking about. Obviously, if you have some self-awareness, you realize that we don't need to put everything about our lives out there and every little thing needs to be exposed out there. But the difference is there's a difference between hiding and pretending and being a hypocrite and trying to pretend that you're something you're not versus the drama mamas out there that just, you know, let's put it all out there. Don't bring all your marriage problems onto social media is what I'm trying to tell you. Don't bring all your individual problems onto social media. That's not transparency. That's stupidity. But transparency is not being a hypocrite. And as you can tell from my preaching how much I value social media, which I don't. What's interesting to me about social media is that people spend so much time and so much energy trying to put this front, trying to put this facade of look how amazing I am. Look how great of a father I am. Look how great of a mother I am. Look how great of a husband or wife. Look how successful I am. And they spend so much energy trying to put this facade. And what I think to myself is if you spend as much energy actually trying to be that, if you put as much energy actually trying to be a good father, actually trying to be a good mother, actually trying to be a good husband, actually trying to be a good wife, if you'd put as much energy in actually getting up and working on yourself and learning and growing and developing right habits and good habits, if you would put as much energy at actually being that, as you put as trying to pretend you are that, you might find that you don't need to or care to pretend. Because a transparent life is a life that says thou has fully known my doctrine, manner of life, purpose, faith. You know me. I'm real. When it comes to authenticity, authenticity is described by these two words, transparency, but there's another word, transparency. And the other word is this, trustworthiness. Trustworthiness. Are you there in Proverbs 25? Look at verse 13. Proverbs 25, 13. As the cold of snow in the time of harvest, notice these words, so is a faithful messenger to them that send him, for he refreshest the soul of his master. I want you to notice these words there. Faithful messenger. When the Bible uses this word faithful, it's our word, the word that we would use is someone that you can count on, someone that is trustworthy. As the cold of snow in the time of harvest, so is a faithful messenger to them that send him, for he refreshest the soul of his master. See, when someone is trustworthy, when you can count on them, when you can lean on them, they are a refreshment to you. They are a refreshment to the soul of his master. You're there in Proverbs 25. Look at verse 19. Notice here what the Bible says in verse 19. Confidence. Here's another word that's a synonym to this word trust. When you trust someone, it means you can put your confidence in them. Confidence in an unfaithful man, an untrustworthy man, in time of trouble, look at it, is like a broken tooth and the foot out of joint. The Bible says here that when you have to put your trust or confidence in someone that is unfaithful, someone that is untrustworthy, it's like having a broken tooth. Do you ever try to eat with an injured tooth, a tooth that is broken or needs to be removed or dealt with, or try to walk or run with a foot out of joint? The idea is this. It's unreliable. You try to run with a foot that's out of joint, you're going to end up on your face. You can't rely on it. You try to eat with a tooth that is broken, it's unreliable. It's going to end up hurting you. Confidence in an unfaithful man in time of trouble is like a broken tooth and a foot out of joint. So we see that the description of authenticity is transparency and trustworthiness. Now, you're there in Proverbs, keep your place there in Proverbs, and go with me to the book of Ecclesiastes, Ecclesiastes chapter number 10. We talked about the description of authenticity. Let's talk quickly about the delicacy of authenticity. The delicacy of authenticity. And while you turn there, let me just read to you an excerpt from this book. You go to Ecclesiastes chapter 10, keep your place in Proverbs, and I'll read to you from this book, Emotionally Intelligent Leadership. Here's what it says. You likely can pinpoint an experience in your life in which you lost trust in someone, e.g. a best friend, coworker, coach, teacher, supervisor. The person said he or she would do one thing but did another. Did not share the whole truth or did not act genuinely. This experience probably changed your perception of the person and maybe even your relationship with him or her. See, what we need to understand is this, that trust and transparency, authenticity, it's something that is good for us to have. It's transparency and trustworthiness, but it's also a very delicate thing. It can be lost very quickly. Are you there in Ecclesiastes 10? Look at verse 1. Ecclesiastes 10 and verse 1. Dead flies cause the ointment of the apothecary to send forth a stinking saver. Dead flies cause the ointment of the apothecary to send forth a stinking saver. The ointment of the apothecary is something that's supposed to, it's like a perfume, it's supposed to smell good, but he says a little dead fly getting caught in that can cause something that's supposed to smell good to become a stinking saver. Now that's the proverb, the notice, the application. So doth a little folly him that is in reputation for wisdom and honor. See, the truth is this, that you can have a reputation of wisdom and honor and just a little folly, just a dead fly can cause you to lose that reputation. A little folly can cause you to lose trust. A little folly can cause you to lose the characteristic or the reputation of being transparent. And the truth is this, when it comes to trust and trustworthiness, the thing about trust is this, that we often don't value trust until we've lost it. And oftentimes it's not until you've lost trust with someone that you realize the importance and the need for trust. So every relationship must be founded on this concept of trust. So here's what I would say to you when it comes to trust and when it comes to authenticity. What is it, authenticity? It's transparency and trustworthiness. Transparency and trustworthiness. And what I would say to everyone here is this, guard your trustworthiness when you have it. When you have trust in your marriage, when you have trust, teenager, when your parents trust you, guard that, guard it. Your spouse trusts you, guard that. Your boss trusts you, guard that. You say, why? Because dead flies cause the ointment of the apothecary to send forth a stinking saver. So does a little folly him that is in reputation for wisdom and honor. You ought to guard trustworthiness. When you have it in a relationship, you ought to guard it. And when you've lost it, you ought to rebuild it. Rebuild your trustworthiness when you've lost it. And oftentimes people ask me, how can I rebuild trustworthiness? Well, you rebuild trustworthiness by becoming trustworthy. And you realize that it'll take time. And you say, well, it's not fair. Listen, it'll take a hundred more times to rebuild trust than it took to lose it. People often give you trust without you doing anything. They just give it to you, but once you've lost it, then it takes a long time to rebuild that trust. You say, well, what do I do to rebuild trust? Be transparent. Be transparent. Don't hide anything. Don't pretend to be something you're not. Live your life in such a way when you can look at those around you and say, thou has fully known my doctrine and manner of life. You know my purpose and my faith. And you ought to be trustworthy. We've been talking a lot about this lately. What does it mean to be trustworthy? It means you keep your word. It means you do what you've said you were going to do. And if you're going to fail in some way, then you make provision for that. You say, look, I'm sorry, I said that I was going to do this, but I'm not able to make that, whatever. You do everything in your power to guard and rebuild trust. So authenticity, it's needed. Look, you cannot have deep relationships without authenticity. It's not going to happen. And if you find yourself having, and by the way, you know, I'm picking on social media, but that's why you say, well, I've got 7,000 friends. How many have you ever actually met? Well, three. The reason that the relationships, these virtual relationships are so shallow is because they don't require authenticity. If you and I are going to have deep relationships, real relationships, experience true love in our lives, not just romantically, but with other Christians and other believers, we must develop authenticity, transparency, and trustworthiness. You must guard it when you have it, and you must rebuild it when you've lost it. So number one, I said authenticity, it's needed. It's needed for an emotionally intelligent individual. But let me give you a second word this morning. You're there in Ecclesiastes chapter 10. I'd like you to keep your place there in Proverbs, but go with me to the book of Acts, the New Testament book of Acts, Matthew, Mark, Luke, John, Acts. Here's a second word, and it's more than one word, but it's this. Healthy self-esteem. Healthy self-esteem. I know as Baptists and as fundamentalists, we don't like to talk too much about self-esteem. Let me define for you what I mean by healthy self-esteem, or I'll read to you the definition from this book. Healthy self-esteem is having a balanced sense of self. It's about balancing confidence in your ability with humility. Emotionally intelligent leaders are resilient and remain confident when faced with setbacks and challenges. In your life, if you want to have good social skills, you want to get along with people and have good relationships, strong relationships, you must practice and you must have this attribute of authenticity, but you must also have this healthy self-esteem. Healthy self-esteem. What is it? Healthy self-esteem is balancing these two things, confidence and humility. Confidence and humility. Nothing wrong with confidence. The Bible talks a lot about confidence, and the Bible uses the word confidence, but it also uses a synonym for the word confidence. I'll just give you one example, Acts chapter 4 and verse 13. Notice what the Bible says, Acts chapter 4 and verse 13. The Bible says this, Now when they saw, and it's talking about the enemies of the cross of Christ, talking about the Pharisees, Now when they saw, notice this description here, the boldness, the boldness. That word boldness there is talking about confidence. When they saw the boldness of Peter and John and perceived that they were unlearned and ignorant men, they marveled that they took knowledge of them, notice this last part of verse 13, that they had been with Jesus. You know that there is a quiet Christian confidence that comes through spending time with Christ. There's a confidence, a quiet confidence, a Christian confidence that comes with being with Christ. You say, I don't have the boldness to go out and preach the gospel. Spend time with Christ, you will. Now when they saw the boldness of Peter and John and perceived that they were unlearned and ignorant men, they marveled and they took knowledge of them that they had been with Jesus. Go to Acts chapter 9, look at verse 27. This is something that characterizes Christians throughout the book of Acts. Acts chapter 9, look at verse 27. The Bible says here, But Barnabas took him, talking about Saul or Paul, and brought him to the apostles, and declared unto them how he had seen the Lord in the way. Notice, Saul had seen the Lord in the way and that he had spoken to him and how he, Paul, had preached, notice the word here, boldly at Damascus in the name of Jesus and he was with them coming in and going out of Jerusalem, verse 29, and he spake boldly in the name of the Lord Jesus and disputed against the Grecians, but they went out to slay him. Notice, there's nothing wrong with confidence. We see here that the believers, they spoke with boldness. The apostle Paul put in a prayer request to the church at Ephesus and he said, As for me, that utterance may be given unto me, that I may open my mouth boldly and make known the mystery of Christ. There's nothing wrong with boldness. The Bible says about the Lord Jesus Christ, if you remember when he was preaching, they looked at him and they said, Never man spake like this man. They said, he teaches not like the Pharisees, but he teaches with authority. There's nothing wrong with that. We should have confidence, especially if your confidence is in the word of God and the Lord Jesus Christ. Then any preacher should be able to stand up and open up the word of God and boldly proclaim the truth of the Bible, confident in the fact that the word of God is what it is. It is the word of the ever-living God. We can have that confidence. There's nothing wrong with it. But in the Christian life, there should always be this balance. Confidence with humility. Confidence with humility. You're there in Acts chapter 9. Go with me, if you would, to Romans chapter 12. Romans chapter 12. When you get there, do me a favor. Keep your finger there as well. I know you have your place in Proverbs. We'll keep your place in Proverbs. I'm confident that you have the ability to keep your place in both Proverbs and Romans. Romans chapter 12. We must have confidence and humility. Confidence and humility. Romans 12 and verse 3. Notice what the Bible says. For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you. Look at these words. Not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think. Look, that should just be a motto of every Christian life. That I do not, and you do not, need to think of ourselves, that a man should not think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly, according as God had dealt to every man the measure of faith. The idea here is that you have to think seriously about yourself, soberly about yourself, somberly about yourself, and not think too much of yourself. Look, so many of the problems we have is that we just take ourselves too seriously. Sometimes we just need to learn to laugh at ourselves. We need a confidence with humility. Confidence with humility. Go to Psalms, if you would, Psalm 131. Keep your place there in Romans. If you kept your place in Proverbs, right before the book of Proverbs is the book of Psalms, Psalm 131. While you turn there, let me read to you about this idea of confidence and humility from this book. Here's an excerpt. It says, The healthy part of this capacity means that you hold yourself in check. Self-confidence, believing in yourself and your ability is a key ingredient of self-esteem. Too much self-confidence, though, can lead to arrogance, which is problematic on a number of fronts. This is why humility is key. Just like chefs need a balance of seasoning and preparing a dish, we, too, need to keep a balance of our sense of self. Look, we read about it in 2 Timothy 3. You don't have to turn there. You go to Psalms, if you would. Men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous boasters, proud. These are not characteristics that should be attributed to a believer. Now, look, you ought to have confidence. I hope you are competent. I hope you're working on your competence and you're working on developing yourself and developing your skills. And as you develop yourself and your skills, then that will create confidence in your ability to be able to do things and accomplish it. Praise the Lord for that. But make sure you always balance confidence with humility. Because, look, and I shouldn't have to say this, but let me just explain it to some of you. Nobody likes a bragger. No one likes a boaster. Nobody likes to be around arrogant people. Nobody likes it. They might not say anything to you. They might go along with it. They might laugh at your jokes, but they don't like it. Confidence must be balanced with humility. Psalm 131, look at verse 11. Psalm 131 and verse 11. Psalm 131, excuse me, verse 1, not verse 11, verse 1. Psalm 131, verse 1. Notice what the Psalmist wrote. Lord, my heart is not haughty. The word haughty is an older word we don't use too much today, but it means arrogant. Showing an attitude of superiority. Acting or pretending like we're better than someone. The Psalmist said, Lord, my heart is not haughty, nor mine eyes lofty. The word lofty means to, it has to do with something being high or something being superior. My heart is not haughty, nor mine eyes lofty. Neither do I exercise myself in great matters or things too high for me. When I was in the military, sometimes people would ask you a question or they ask you to make a decision. And the way that you would say it is, that's above my pay grade. Neither do I exercise myself in great matters or in things too high for me. That is not within my scope of authority. I cannot make that decision. You're going to have to find someone that has a few more stripes on their shoulder than I have on my shoulder to make that decision. Because the truth is this, that in life, you and I need to just be careful and have enough of an emotional self-awareness to understand when we should not be exercising ourselves in great matters or in things too high for us. We should have a humble attitude that is balanced with confidence. Now look, this is why Jesus said it's better. He said when you go to a feast or a marriage or some sort of party, instead of taking the seat of prominence, it's better for you to take a lowly seat and have someone come to you and say, hey, we don't want you sitting here, we want you sitting over here. He said that's better than for you to take a seat of prominence and have someone say, no, no, that's for VIPs, that's not for you. In life, we should always try to live humbly. Now humble does not mean that you sit there and you criticize yourself and you talk about how bad you are and how much you stink at everything. That's not humility, that's just a different extreme of pride. Listen to me. You say, oh, I'm a very humble person and all I do is talk about how bad I am at this and how I'm a failure here and how I'm a... Yeah, but here's the thing, when all you do is talk about yourself, that's still pride. You're still the center of your attention. Humility is not thinking less of yourself, humility is not thinking of yourself at all. And there's nothing wrong with having confidence. I hope you have some confidence and definitely confidence in the things of God. But we must have a healthy self-esteem, this confidence that is balanced with humility. That says I can confidently and boldly proclaim what I know to be true, but I'm not going to allow myself to get out of control in my arrogance or in this inflated view of self because I know exactly who I am and I know that all I am is a sinner saved by grace. So we must have this balance because the truth is that arrogance is problematic. It will cause problems in all sorts of areas of life. So I said number one this morning, we need authenticity. Number two, we need a healthy self-esteem. And thirdly, this morning, if you would, go with me to the book of Genesis. I know you're in Proverbs and in Romans, but go to Genesis if you would. Let me give you the third word. And look, you do what you want with this. I'm telling you if you want to live a healthy life with healthy relationships, these are the characteristics and you ought to look at yourself and ask yourself, am I an authentic person? Am I transparent and trustworthy? Do I have healthy self-esteem? Maybe your lack is in confidence and you need to work on that. Maybe your lack is in humility and you need to work on that, but you need to have this balance of confidence and humility. Here's the third word and the third characteristic. It's flexibility. Flexibility, let me give you a definition. Flexibility is being open and adaptive to change. It's about adapting your approach and style based on changing circumstances. Emotionally intelligent people seek input and feedback from others and adjust accordingly. If you're going to be someone who is emotionally mature, who is emotionally healthy, you're going to have to not only have authenticity, not only have healthy self-esteem, but you're going to have to develop this characteristic and it's flexibility. Flexibility. I want you to notice here in Genesis 49 and verse 22, we have the story of Jacob. Remember Jacob, later renamed Israel. He's the father of the 12 sons of Israel that will become tribes. Here we find Israel or Jacob on his deathbed and he's speaking to his 12 sons and he's giving them all these things right before he dies, saying these things to them. And in Genesis 49 and verse 22, I want you to notice what he says to Joseph. Remember Joseph? Joseph's a great character in the Bible, one of the sons of Jacob. And if you remember, Joseph was sold into slavery by his brothers, betrayed by his brothers. And then he was lied about and thrown in prison. And then, of course, God brought him out of prison. Not before he'd been forgotten by his friends. God brought him out of prison and made him the second most powerful man in Egypt. In Genesis 49 and verse 22, Jacob on his deathbed, speaking to his son Joseph, here's what he says about Joseph. He says Joseph is a fruitful bough. A bough is a branch in a tree, a main branch that produces fruit. He says Joseph is a fruitful bough. And I would say so. Joseph was used of God to save all of his family and save all of his people during a time of famine. He was instrumental in bringing them into Egypt and caring for their physical needs. So, Jacob says of Joseph, Joseph is a fruitful bough, even a fruitful bough by a well. But then he says this, whose branches run over the wall. He means by this, and what I believe that Jacob means by this about Joseph is this, that Joseph lived a life of hostility. He lived a life of obstacles. He lived a life of difficulty. He often had these barriers in life. He had these problems and these walls that would come into his life. But Joseph was an individual who had flexibility. And he was not just a fruitful bough, but he was a bough whose branches could run over the wall. In fact, I think he was fruitful because he was flexible. He did not allow barriers or difficulty or problems in life to stop him. To use another military quote, it is known as this, improvise, adapt, and overcome. Look, in life, you and I are going to have to learn to be flexible. I realize that most people don't like change. I get that. There's few people that do, but by and large, most people don't like change. But here's one thing that you need to understand. One of the most consistent things in life, you say, I don't like change. One of the most consistent things in life is that things are consistently changing. I remember when I first realized this in my life, because as a child, as a kid growing up, especially if you live in a stable home with stable parents, which I realize not all of you did, and I'm sorry for that, but my life was a life of consistency. My life was pretty consistent my entire life. We did the same thing every Sunday morning, every Sunday night, every Wednesday night, every Saturday morning. And it was a consistent life, and I praise God for that. I remember when I became an adult, and my wife and I would have these transitions, and we'd have things happen, of course, especially once we entered into the ministry. I began to realize that nothing ever stays the same. Things are constantly changing, especially in church world. In church world, somebody brought this up to me recently, because I've said this in the past. Over the last 13 years of ministry, I felt like I've pastored seven different churches. The reason for that is because people are constantly coming and going. And look, I don't like that, but you just have to realize, you need to realize that people come and go. It's just how it is. And life changes, things are constantly changing. You say, what do we do? You learn to roll with the punches. You learn to accept changes when necessary. I've said this recently, and I've said it throughout the years, a growing church is always in transition. Thomas Jefferson said, in matters of style, swim with the current. In matters of principle, stand like a rock. And look, obviously, Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever. And we're not going to change on principle. We're not going to change on doctrine. We're not going to change on the things that are true from the Word of God. But we need to realize that life is constantly changing. And to be emotionally healthy, look, you're just going to have to be able to roll with the punches. You want to be like Joseph and be a fruitful bow? You want to be a fruitful bow? Then you need to have your branches run over the wall. See, when Joseph, when Joseph was sold into slavery by his own brothers, and he gets to Potiphar's house, read the story of Joseph. What do we see? Do we see a 17-year-old kid who's depressed and discouraged and upset and has a bad attitude and says, this isn't fair and this isn't right? Is that what you see in the life of Joseph? You know what you see? You see a young man who said, well, if this is where I'm going to be and this is where God has brought me and this is where life has brought me, he said, I'm going to make the best out of it. And he was promoted in Potiphar's house. And then, when Potiphar's wife lies about him and gets him thrown into prison, what do we see? A young man who's depressed and discouraged and upset and angry at God and says, it's not fair? No, we see him get to work. He has a good attitude. The Bible says that they put him in charge of the prisoners. And I'm just here to tell you that if you're going to live a life of emotional health, you're going to have to learn to be flexible because life is always changing. Avoid the we-never-have-done-it-that-way mentality. I've heard that so many times in the last 13 years of ministry. Obviously, things change in ministry all the time. Obviously, we have to make adjustments from time to time. And what people always say to me is, well, we've never done it that way. Well, we're going to do it that way now. Well, we've never done it that way. Well, you know, we never had four acres of property before. Well, we've never done it that way. Well, we never had a 400-seat auditorium before. Look, as churches grow and as the situations change, things are going to have to change. It's just the way it is. And someone who is emotionally intelligent, they learn to roll with the punches. They learn to accept changes when necessary. I'm not talking about compromise. I'm not talking about principles. I'm talking about you just realize that things change. You just realize that things, you know, some people, look, we had COVID a few years ago, and I don't like COVID. I didn't like COVID. I didn't like those. But some people are just freaking out. And I'm just, just roll with the punches. What are you going to do? Assassinate Dr. Fauci? Nobody asked me what to do about COVID. You know, and I'm going to go to Walmart and talk to the manager about it. Why? Just roll with the punches. Just do what you got to do and move on with life. That's what healthy, emotionally healthy people do. And I'm not saying that I agree with everything I've done with COVID. I'm not saying that. I'm saying is we have to learn to play the cards that we've been dealt with. So number one, authenticity. Number two, healthy self-esteem. Number three, flexibility. Let me give you a fourth one. The fourth one is closely related. If you kept your place in Romans, go with me to Philippians, if you would. From Romans, you'll go past 1 Corinthians, Galatians, Ephesians, into the book of Philippians. Philippians chapter number four. From Romans, 1 Corinthians, Galatians, Ephesians, Philippians. Philippians chapter four. Here's the fourth one. And look, I'm going to be transparent with you. Can I be transparent with you? Authenticity. That was fully known my manner of life. I can tell you right now, this is the one I struggle with. This is the one I struggle with. I'll just be honest with you. I'm working on it. I'm working on it. And I think we should all try to work on it. But here's number four, optimism. Optimism. What's optimism? Optimism is having a positive outlook. It's about setting a positive tone for the future. Emotionally intelligent leaders use optimism to foster hope and generate energy. Optimism is having a positive outlook. Notice there, Philippians four. Look at verse eight. I want you to know this. The Apostle Paul is writing Philippians chapter four and verse eight. And he's writing it from a prison cell. He's sitting in prison. And here's what he says. Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report, if there be any virtue, if there be any praise, think on these things. What is he talking about? He's talking about being positive. He's talking about having optimism. He's talking about living a life of optimism. Go to Proverbs chapter 23 if you would. If you go back to Proverbs, I think you kept your place in Proverbs. Proverbs 23. While you go there, let me read to you from this book. Optimism, excuse me, optimist. I want you to listen to this. Optimists interpret both success and failure differently than pessimists. Optimists do not take failure personally. They view failure as a temporary setback. On the other hand, pessimists make the opposite attributions. They take failure personally. And look, optimism is just simply this, having a positive outlook, is trying to look at things from a good perspective. You've heard it before, is seeing the cup as half full as opposed to being half empty. And again, maybe this is not your normal nature or just how you are, and look, I'll tell you right now, this is not how I am. This week, I was sitting in my office working on this sermon, working on this sermon. I'm working on the sermon. I've been working on it all morning, and it was time for lunch, and I hit save, and I closed the file, and I went downstairs and had lunch with my family, and after lunch, I got a phone call and got some news about a situation that was not a good thing and something that we were hoping would go one way and ended up going a different way, and I was very upset about it, and my wife and I have a cup of coffee after lunch every day, and she makes a cup of coffee, and she sits down, and I'm telling her about the situation. I'm upset about it and frustrated with it and saying this and that, and she's looking at me and saying, Well, honey, maybe we can do this, and what about this option? Have you thought about this? And I'm looking at her, and I'm thinking to myself, Why are you being so stinking optimist about this thing? Your good attitude is really getting on my nerves, and she's, Well, I think maybe this, and that, and I said, Oh, okay. And I go upstairs after lunch, and I open up my Word document to keep working on my sermon, and I see point number four, optimism. I'm like, Ah! And look, sometimes in life, things don't go our way. Sometimes they don't work out the way we wanted them to. Sometimes we get bad news. But how we respond in those moments will say a lot about the health of our emotions, our stress, our anxiety. Proverbs 23 and verse 7, the Bible says this, For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he. The way you think about things, the way you ponder things, the way you let things soak in your mind, that is the attitude that you will have. That's why Paul said, like we read, Whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report, if there be any virtue, if there be any praise, think on these things. I think the reason that a lot of us are so negative is because we're all honestly just thinking negatively, focusing on the negative. There's always something good to focus on. There's always something positive to focus on. You live your life running around like Chicken Little and the sky's falling and everything's bad, everything's terrible. But at the very least, at the end of the day, you can always praise the Lord that you're saved, that your name's written in the Lamb's Book of Life, that you're on your way to heaven. Look, there's always something to be positive about. So optimism, it's a needed skill. Then I'd like you to go back to Genesis if you would. Let's look at this character Joseph again. We could have looked at Joseph for optimism as well. We didn't, but obviously he was optimistic in every situation he found himself in. I've got six of these. I've got to quickly give you the last two. Number one, authenticity. What is it? Transparency and trustworthiness. And it's a delicate thing. If you have it, guard it. If you lost it, rebuild it. Then healthy esteem. It is this balance between confidence and humility. Flexibility, the understanding that life is constantly changing. We need to roll with the punches, and we need to accept changes when necessary. We're not talking about compromise. We're not talking about right and wrong or truth. But things change. Just roll with it. Number four, optimism. Then number five, here's the word, initiative. Initiative is taking action. It means being a self-starter and being motivated to take the first step. Emotionally intelligent people are ready to take action, demonstrate interest, and capitalize on opportunities. We talked about Joseph, but I'd like you to see it here. Genesis 39 and verse 20. The Bible says, And Joseph's master took him and put him into prison, a place where the king's prisoners were bound, and he was there in the prison. Look at verse 21. But the Lord was with Joseph. Hey, you know when you find yourself in prison, at the very least, the Lord is with you. You're saved. You find yourself in bad situations, the Lord is with you. But the Lord was with Joseph and showed him mercy and gave him favor in the side of the keepers of the prison. Look at verse 22. And the keeper of the prison committed to Joseph's hand all the prisoners that were in the prison, and whatsoever they did there, look at it, whatsoever they did there, look at these words, look at these words, he was the doer of it. I love that phrase. He was the doer of it. What is that? Initiative. Taking initiative means seeing a gap or opportunity and acting to fill it. People with initiative often see problems as opportunities. And look, we must be people of initiative. Proactive. Not reactive, but proactive. You're there in Genesis 39 and flip over to Genesis 47. Genesis 47 and verse 6. This is Pharaoh after Joseph has been elevated to the palace and his family has came into Egypt. Pharaoh makes a request, Genesis 47 verse 6. Notice what it says. The land of Egypt is before thee. In the best of the land make thy father and brethren to dwell. This is Pharaoh speaking to Joseph. In the land of Goshen let them dwell. And then he says this. This is what Pharaoh says to Joseph. This is what the boss says to the employee about the employee's friends and family. He says, and if thou knowest any men of activity among them, then make them rulers over my cattle. When Joseph's family came, Pharaoh looks at Joseph and says, if you know any men of activity, if you know any men that are like you, Joseph, just go ahead and hire them. And that phrase, men of activity, means men that take initiative. Men that are not just sitting around waiting for things to happen, but they're making things happen. Remember, he was the doer of it. And by the way, look, for you men that work, you ought to live your life in such a way, all of you that work, you ought to live your life in such a way, especially at work, that your boss would look at you and say, I think you're weird. I don't know about this whole Christianity thing. I think you'd maybe take it a little too far and you always want Sundays off. But if you've got more people like you, bring them on. You ought to be the best worker at your job. You should. Not this proud, arrogant, look at me, look how great I am. No, no, remember, confidence with humility. But we should be people of initiative, men of activity, women of activity. It might be said of us that whatsoever they did there, he was the doer of it. She was the doer of it. So we need initiative. And then lastly, this morning, let me give you the last one. Go with me to Ecclesiastes. If you kept your place in Proverbs, Ecclesiastes chapter nine, we're talking about social skills that you need. Healthy, emotionally intelligent people. They have authenticity, healthy self-esteem, flexibility, optimism, initiative. Here's number six. Number six, and this is my favorite. Look, I'll be honest with you, number four I struggle with. Number six, this is my favorite. Achievement, achievement. And let me just explain what is meant by that. Achievement is striving for excellence. This is my pet peeve. I love for our church, for us to have excellence in all we do. Achievement is striving for excellence. It's about setting high personal standards and getting results. Emotionally intelligent leaders strive to improve and are motivated by an internal drive to succeed. And I think in the Christian life that you and I, well, let's just look at the verse. Ecclesiastes nine and verse 10. Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might. Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might. For there is no work nor device nor knowledge nor wisdom in the grave whether thou goest. And again, with humility, with a quiet confidence, with flexibility, with authenticity, with initiative, with optimism, I think this, that in the Christian life, anything you and I set ourselves to do, we have to give it our best. We have to do our best. Colossians 3 23, you don't have to turn there. The Bible says this. Whatsoever you do, do it heartily. Ask to the Lord and not unto men. And look, I'm just telling you this. If God has made you a husband, then you ought to work hard at being the best husband you can be. And if God has made you a wife, then you ought to work hard to be the best wife that you can be. And if God has allowed you the wonderful privilege of being a parent and being a father or being a mother, then you ought to work hard at being the best father and mother you can be. You ought to be the best employee you can be at work. And you ought to be the best Christian you can be. Look, whatever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy mind. I've said it before. If I was an usher, I'd try to be the best usher I could be. If I was on the safety team, I'd try to be the best safety team member I could be. If I was in the orchestra, I'd try to be the best orchestra member I could be. If I was a pastor, I'd try to be the best pastor I could be. I'm not saying I'm the best pastor. I'm not saying that. I think we should all be trying to do our best. To be our best. Especially when it comes to God. We ought to do our best for the glory of God. Whatsoever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy mind. Why? For there is no work, nor device, nor knowledge, nor wisdom in the grave where the thou goes. So what does that mean? Here's what it means. You get one shot at life. You get one shot at it. And as it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment. You get one shot at this thing called life. So what are you going to do with it? How are you going to live it? Full of regrets? Full of missteps? Full of failures? Or are you going to give it your best? We only have one life. So why not live it with authenticity? Being transparent and trustworthy. Why not live it with healthy self-confidence? Healthy self-esteem. Confidence balanced by humility. Why not live it with flexibility? Instead of being rigid and hard and breaking every time that life throws you a curve ball. Why don't we learn to roll with the punches? Accept changes when necessary. Be a fruitful bow. Like Joseph. And to be able to climb over those barriers. How about optimism? Keeping a positive outlook. Realizing that all things work together for good to them that love God. To them who are called according to His purpose. What about initiative? Not being reactive but proactive. And achievement. Giving it your best. Give it your best. Excellence. Attention to detail. These are things, if you've been part of our church for any length of time, you know that these are things I value. Attention to detail. I just think if we're going to do it, let's do it right. If we're going to do it, let's make it look nice. Let's give it our best. Watch over thy hand, find it to do. Do what thy might. These are characteristics of people. With healthy self-esteem. And wouldn't you say that this is rare? I mean, if you found someone who had authenticity, who was transparent and trustworthy. Listen to what I'm about to say to you. Because maybe you've been listening to this all summer and you're like, ah, this doesn't apply to me. But if you found someone who was both transparent and trustworthy. Who was confident in their abilities but balanced it with humility. Who was flexible and didn't complain when changes came about but rolled with the punches. And overcame and adapted and improvised when there was problems. Who was optimistic and even when things are not going well, they just look at the positive and try to keep things positive. Who took initiative, wasn't lazy. They were men of activity, women of activity. Who valued achievement and attention to detail and excellence and success. If you met someone like that, wouldn't you hire them? Wouldn't you marry them? Wouldn't you be proud if that was your son, if that was your daughter and say, here's my son, here's my daughter. What do we have today? Today we have this, for men shall be lovers of their own selves. Covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy. Without natural reflection, truce breakers, false accusers, incontinent, fears, despisers of those that are good. Traders, heady, high-minded, lovers of pleasure more than lovers of God. Having a form of godliness but denying the power thereof from such turn away. What to God that this would not be what describes a New Testament Bible believing Christian. But instead we would be authentic, confident and humble, flexible, optimistic, have initiative and give it our best. What to God we live this way. Let's bow our heads together. Heavenly Father, Lord we do love you. Lord we do love you. Lord I pray you'd help us. Help us to work on ourselves. Help us to be the person that you've called us to be. And in some of these areas maybe we are succeeding and in some of these areas maybe we're struggling. And help us to have enough emotional intelligence to know and to get to work on ourselves. And to say here's an area I need to work on. Maybe it's transparency. Maybe it's trustworthiness. Maybe it's humility. Maybe it's confidence. Maybe it's initiative, optimism, flexibility. Here's an area I need to work on. And help us to become healthy, emotionally healthy and mature individuals. We love you. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen. Alright we're going to have Brother Matt come up and lead us in a final song. Just want to give you a couple of closing announcements. Just want to remind you a couple of things. First of all don't forget next Sunday we're going to be taking a break from emotional intelligence because it will be Mother's Day. So I'll be preaching a Mother's Day sermon. And I want to encourage you of course to be here for that. As we are going to be celebrating mothers and we have of course the children's choir that will be singing in honor of Mother's Day. And then on Saturday is a ladies' tea. So we don't want you to forget about that. Ladies' tea is this Saturday. Make sure you're there for that. Sign up for that if you've not yet done that. And if you have a, if you'd like to volunteer and help with the ladies' tea then we've got some sign-up sheets in the foyer. So please make sure you do that. And then I do want to invite you to be back tonight at 6 p.m. And tonight we're going to be in our Book of Numbers series. But I'm going to be preaching a sermon out of Numbers chapter 31. And I'm going to be preaching on a question, a very difficult question that I think people often ask. And I want to take a whole sermon to answer this question for you. And the question is this. Why did God sanction the death of men, women and children in the Old Testament? And this is a question that is often asked to Christians by people who are maybe anti-Bible or Atheists. And they'll say, well why would God sanction the death of men, women and children in the Old Testament? Tonight we're going to be in Numbers 31. We'll be looking at this question. I want to answer this question for you biblically from the Bible. So I want to encourage you to be here tonight as we answer the question from the Word of God. Why would God sanction the death of men, women and children in the Old Testament? I think you'll find it interesting. And I want to encourage you to be with us 6 p.m. for the evening service. If there's anything that we can do for you, please let us know. We'll have Brother Matt come up and lead us in a final song. Turn to song 325. Trust and obey 325. Three, two, five. Sing it out on the first. When we walk with the Lord In the light of his word What a glory he sheds on our way While we do his goodwill He abides with us still And with all who will trust and obey Trust and obey For there's no other way To be happy in Jesus But to trust and obey Not a shadow can rise Not a cloud in the skies But his smile quickly drives it away Not a doubt or a fear Not a sigh nor a tear Can abide while we trust and obey Trust and obey For there's no other way To be happy in Jesus But to trust and obey Not a burden we bear Not a sorrow we share But our toil he doth richly repay Not a grief or a loss Not a frown nor a cross But he's blessed if we trust and obey Trust and obey For there's no other way To be happy in Jesus But to trust and obey But we never can prove The delights of his love Until all on the altar we lay For the favor he shows And the joy he bestows Are for them who will trust and obey Trust and obey For there's no other way To be happy in Jesus But to trust and obey You're singing well, sing it out on the last Then in fellowship suite We shall sit at his feet For we'll walk by his side in the wind But he says we will do And he signs we will go To trust and obey Sing it out To trust and obey For there's no other way To be happy in Jesus But to trust and obey Amen, good singing, before we leave If anybody has questions about salvation, church membership, or baptism, the pastor will be at the door I'd love to talk to you and direct you to someone who's training to talk about that I'm going to ask Brother Serge, would you close a prayer for us? Amen Amen Amen Amen Amen Amen Amen Amen Amen Amen Amen Amen Amen Amen Amen Amen Amen Amen