(Disclaimer: This transcript is auto-generated and may contain mistakes.) In Ephesians chapter 5, the part of the chapter that I want to focus on is the beginning of verse 25 there, where the Bible reads, Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself forth, that he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, that he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that it should be holy and without blemish, so ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. For he loveth his wife, loveth himself, for no man ever yet hated his own flesh, but nourished and cherished it, that even as the Lord the church. Now what I want to preach about tonight is basically those first words of Ephesians chapter 5, where it says, husbands love your wives. Now what I want to talk about tonight is different ways that the Bible tells us that we should love our wives and how we should love our wives. Now, God likens the love that we should have for our wives to the love that he has for the church, and the love that he had for us as individuals when he died on the cross to pay for our sins. So this is an extreme amount of love. The Bible says for God so loved the world that he gave. He's talking about the depths for which he loved the world, that he gave his only to God's son, that whosoever believeth in him shall not perish but have everlasting life. He said, but God commended his love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners Christ died for us. So God's love is obviously the ultimate love that anyone could ever have, and he tells us that we should love our wives as he loves us, and as he loved the church and so forth by giving himself for it. So how can we as husbands love our wives? Now, again, this sermon is not really directed toward the ladies. I've done other sermons that were more directed toward the ladies, where I focus more on the part of the passage where it talks about that the wives are supposed to obey their husbands and reference their husbands and treat them with respect and so forth. But tonight is more geared at the men. What is their part in this thing of marriage? What is their role? What does God require of them? What is God expecting them to do? Now, marriage, the Bible says, is honorable in all and the bed undefiled, but for mongers and adulterers God will judge. God ordained the institution of marriage all the way back in the book of Genesis, chapter number 2, when God placed the man and his wife in the Garden of Eden. Right there he started out with that married couple, and he instituted the bond of marriage. It's all throughout the Bible. It's an important subject, and so we ought to take our roles as husbands seriously. Now, maybe you're single tonight, and so you might think this doesn't apply to you, but to those that are young or teenagers or young men, someday you will be married, and you're going to need to know this information now in advance. Ladies, this is for you to just sit back and listen, but these principles can be applied to a lot of other things if you can teach your children these things and so forth someday. But I think that there's going to be something in the sermon for everyone tonight. So in what way should husbands love their wives? Well, first of all, turn, if you would, to Deuteronomy, chapter 24, verse 5. Deuteronomy 24, verse 5. We'll start out at the very beginning here because this is talking about when a person first gets married. This is referring to the first year of marriage. It says in Deuteronomy, chapter number 24, verse 5, it says, When a man hath taken a new wife, he shall not go out to war, neither shall he be charged with any business, but he shall be free at home one year, and shall cheer up his wife which he hath taken. So the principle that we can take from this verse in Deuteronomy 24, 5 is that God wants us to spend time with our wives. Here he talks about people that are newly married, and he says it's not right to pull that guy out of the home and send him off to war somewhere, or to make him do some kind of work in a distant city or something. It says that he needs to be at home and spend time with his wife for that first year to cheer up his wife. Now, what does the word cheer mean? Well, if you look throughout the Bible and the word cheer it talks about being of good cheer or being cheery. It's cheerful. It basically is talking about joy. It's talking about being happy. And God wants us to be happily married. And so he says, look, when you first get married, you know, spend that first year and really focus on just being happy with your wife and just spending time with your wife. And today a lot of husbands don't spend any time with their wives. They'd rather be out with their buddies and hanging around with the guys, or maybe they just spend all their time at work and they spend their time on hobbies and things that don't involve their wife. And look, there are a lot of things in our lives that matter. Church matters, soul-winning matters, our service for God matters, our job matters. Those are really important things. But our marriage also matters. And God is saying here that starting out on the right footing in your marriage is important. And he's saying, especially in that first year, be sure to spend adequate time with your wife, to cheer up your wife, to basically rejoice and have fun with your wife and to build that relationship and that friendship. Now, notice what it doesn't say. Does that verse say, don't have children for the first two years? Is that mentioned? No. Because there's a teaching out there today even amongst Baptists and independent Baptists, and I've heard this in church literally probably from ten different preachers just in my life growing up. And they all said the same thing. When you get married, you should wait two years before you have children. Wait two years, wait two years. And I always thought to myself, you know, that isn't biblical, that isn't right, that doesn't make any sense. And I didn't agree with that, but you know what? It was several years ago, I was reading about Margaret Sanger, the founder of Planned Parenthood. Planned Parenthood. And did you know that she said in her book, and this is the woman who basically fought to make birth control legal in America, and this is the woman who fought to start Planned Parenthood, which is a total abortion center, which is a wicked place. She literally is the one who came up with that. And in her book, she said that married couples should wait two years before having... It didn't come from this book. It came from a book of a racist, genocidal, eugenicist Margaret Sanger. That's where that doctrine came from. It's being repeated in churches today. That's not what the Bible says, because they say, well, you know, you've got to wait two years to have children so you can get to know your wife. Well, first of all, you should probably know your wife a little bit before you get married. That'd be a good idea. But even if you got married and your wife became pregnant right away, you've still got nine months along with your wife before the baby comes. And you're like, Brother Rodriguez is a new dad. You know, he just had the baby born a few days ago. I'll tell you right now, that baby being born in that house, that's going to strengthen that relationship. It's not going to take away from it. I mean, I'm married, and my wife and I, we had children pretty much right away. I mean, our first child was born about a year after we got married. So we pretty much jumped right into having children. And you know what? The more children we have, and today we have six children, it has strengthened our marriage. It has brought us closer together. And did you know that the most common time for people to get divorced is either in the first two years of marriage or in the first two years after the last child leaves the home? Did you know that? That's just statistically, those are the most dangerous times for your marriage. Why? No children. So just based on those statistics, it sounds like children will help strengthen your marriage, not tear it apart. You know, if you're a young married person, you're in that danger zone if you're in those first two years, just statistically speaking. Maybe that's why God said, you know, don't get too busy with everything else if you just took a wife. You better take that first year and make sure that you build your marriage. That's important. And so in Deuteronomy 24, 5, we see the principle of spending time with your wife. That's one way that you can love your wife is by giving of your time, giving of yourself, always being too busy to just have a little fun and cheer up your wife, okay? Now, I don't really understand why this wife even needs to be cheered up or something. Like it's bad getting married or something. I don't know, but, you know. I don't think it necessarily means, like, cheer her up like she's sad, but rather just rejoice and, you know, enjoy and be cheerful and have a good time is what that's referring to, because of the fact that, you know, you want to build that relationship. Let's go to 1 Corinthians 7. I'm sorry, go to 1 Corinthians 14. That's another part of the sermon. 1 Corinthians 14. So first of all, we see that one way to love your wife is to spend time with your wife and build that relationship. But not only that, it says in 1 Corinthians 14, in verse 35, it says, And if they will learn anything, let them ask their husbands at home, for it is a shame for women to speak in the church. Now, this is a verse that's often used to explain why women should not be speaking in church. You know, why we have a man behind the pulpit preaching and why everybody who does the speaking role in church is a man. But what we can learn from this subject also is that a husband in his proper role should basically be equipped to be able to answer the spiritual questions of his wife, right? So part of the husband's role is to be a spiritual leader where his wife can ask him a question about the Bible and he doesn't just go, I don't know. Right? Because he hasn't read it. And that's why the Bible says, Study to show thyself approved unto God a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the worship. Because if you don't know the Bible, that's embarrassing. That's a shame. You know, your wife keeps asking you stuff about the Bible and you don't know what you're talking about. You better study God's Word and read it so that you can be equipped to lead your wife spiritually and so that you can speak the truth to her in love. Amen. And God's Word is truth. Now, as a pastor, people expect me to know the answer to questions that they ask me. People ask me Bible questions all the time. You know, Brother Davis asked me a question before the service and he's asking me about them putting the oil on the right ear and the right thumb and I just say, you know, I'm not really sure what that means, Brother Davis. You know, he stumped me right before the service. But it'd be pretty sad if every time he or anyone else walked up to me and asked me a question about the Bible, I didn't know the answer. Now, I'm not ashamed every once in a while when I don't know the answer, you know, about why the oil was put in the palm of the left hand and put on the tip of the right ear. You know, that's a tough question, okay? And I don't know everything. But at least I know a lot, you know? Otherwise, I wouldn't even be qualified to be a pastor. And you know what? You ought to know a lot of Bible as a husband because really that is your church, if you think about it, because the Bible says if a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God? You know, you start out, I started out long before I pastored a church. I pastored the Anderson family. You know, I led that family. I taught that family. And so part of your role as a husband is to be the spiritual leader, to know the answers to questions, to know your Bible, and to be able to preach the Bible and teach the Bible unto your wife in love. So you've got to be there. You've got to spend time with her. And you want to be the leader that can teach and preach the Bible and answer the questions that your wife has. Go to Colossians 3, 19. Colossians chapter 3, verse 19. So basically we're just hitting a lot of different passages in the Bible tonight just showing different things that God commands us to do as husbands, ways in which we can love our wives and show our wives that we love them. Look at Colossians chapter number 3, verse 19. This is kind of a parallel passage between Galatians 5. It says in Colossians 3, 19, husbands, love your wives and be not bitter against them. Okay. What is bitterness? Well, if you look at bitterness in the Bible, it's when people brood over past wrongs that were done to them. The Bible talks about holding a grudge against thy people in Leviticus. He tells us we should not grudge one against another. We should not be bitter against our wife. You see, part of what Jesus Christ showed, the love that He showed when He died on the cross for our sins, was that He was forgiving us. He forgave us of all our sins if we believe on them. Well, the Bible teaches us as husbands that we should be forgiving of our wives. There are going to be times that your wife makes a mistake and does wrong or says the wrong thing. We should not be bringing that up again and being bitter about it. And weeks later, oh, I'm still mad about that. You know, I shouldn't be mad about something that my wife did yesterday. Did you hear me? I shouldn't be mad about something that she did yesterday or mad about something that she did a week ago or a year ago or a month ago. I'm supposed to let that go. I'm not supposed to be bitter. He said love your wives, and here's how you're going to do it by not being bitter against them because it's going to be hard for you to show your wife the love that you owe her if you're bitter and angry at her because of something that she did in the past. That's why the Bible says let not the sun go down upon your wrath. You know, from day to day, you shouldn't hold a grudge or have bitterness toward any of your fellow brothers and sisters in Christ, period. Anybody in this church, you shouldn't hold a grudge about, you know, six months ago, the way that she looked at me, and I appreciate how she kind of didn't shake my hand. She kind of walked over. You know, we shouldn't hold a grudge against anybody, but especially not against your wife because part of your job as being a Christ-like husband is to forgive, to let things go. Just like Jesus said, Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do. We should forgive our wife every wrong that she's ever... You see, I should have a completely clean slate with my wife today except for all the stuff she did this afternoon. You know what I mean? No, I'm just kidding. But anyway, you know, it should be a totally clean slate. It shouldn't be something from yesterday or the way, you know, if I'm mad about something, it's something that happened today. It ought to be, okay? Because we should never hold a grudge. And, you know, isn't it good to just wake up every morning with a clean, new start? You know, you don't want to wake up, and you already know your husband's already mad or your wife's already mad at you because they're bitter and holding a grudge about something else. That's going to destroy your relationship. That bitterness is going to... is going to canker and spread and get worse. And so part of the way that we love our wives is by being forgiving and not being bitter about past wrongs that they've done to us. You say, well, you know what? Your wife's going to do you wrong? Well, obviously. Obviously, husbands are going to do wrong with their wives. Wives are going to do wrong. We're all human. None of us is perfect. And so we have to be able to let things go as Christians. That's part of being a Christian. So first of all, we need to spend time with our wife. Take the time necessary to cultivate that relationship with our wife. That's important to our spiritual life. We also need to, you know, be able to learn the Bible and be the spiritual leader. We also need to be forgiving and show our wife love by forgiving and letting things go. But not only that, it's our job to provide for our wife. Go to Exodus chapter 21. Exodus chapter 21. And while you're turning there, I'll read to you a more famous passage from 1 Timothy chapter 5 where it says, But if any provide not for his own, and especially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith and is worse than an infidel. So the Bible teaches us that it's our job to provide for those of our own house. And if we don't, we're as bad as an infidel? No, we're worse than an infidel. The Bible says we need to provide for those of our own house that we feed and clothe our wife. But here in Exodus 21, now this is a verse that you're probably not often going to hear preached in church just because it's a little bit of a... I don't know what you say. It kind of alludes to something that we don't accept in our society because, you know, it's wrong in the first place. But back in the Bible days and back in the time when Exodus 21 was given to the children of Israel, you know, there were a lot of people that had multiple wives. Now, listen, it was never right for people to have multiple wives. God never ordained that. He says that no one who has had multiple wives could ever be a bishop or a deacon in the church. He said at the beginning, he made them male and female and said that a man shall cleave unto his wife and they too shall be one flesh, not three. He said two shall be one flesh. And what God has joined together, let not man put aside. God never condoned multiple wives. He said in Deuteronomy, thou shalt not multiply wives. So, you know, we should not have multiple wives. God never condoned of that. But in the book of Exodus, we have not only spiritual laws, we also have civil laws about how to govern their sight. They didn't have a whole separate set of laws for their government. Basically, the biblical law, that was all their law. It handled all their civil needs. It handled all their criminal needs. And it was their spiritual work also. So it was all in one. And so multiplicity of wives in the Bible days was a reality. God never condoned it. It was always a sinful, wrong thing to do. But it existed. That's a fact. It did exist. And there were men in the Bible who had multiple wives. Every story you look at where men had multiple wives, it was all kinds of problems. It led to all kinds of trouble and strife and friction. Because that's never been God's plan. It never will be God's plan. It's one man and one woman is what the Bible defines as marriage. Not a multiplicity of wives. But today, did you know that there are countries in the world where multiple wives exist? Now in America, having more than one wife is illegal. In places like, I don't know, Saudi Arabia or something. Who's ever been to Saudi Arabia before? Anybody been in the military? You been over there, Kirk? Do people have more than one wife there to some people? Yeah. Because it's an Islamic place. And in Islam, according to Islam, you're allowed to have up to four wives. And I always ask the Islamic people, why did Mohammed have five? They say, well, that was just an exception. Okay, whatever. But anyway, they say, four is the limit. I don't know where they come up with that, but they claim. So look, if you're living in an Islamic country, you're going to be surrounded by some people that have multiple wives. Doesn't make it right. It's never been right. The Muslims are wrong about that. But here, he's explaining that if a man takes a second wife, okay, this is just, if a man is not, he's not saying it's right. He's never condoned with it. But he says in verse 10 of Exodus 21, if he take him another wife, her food, her raiment, and her duty of marriage shall he not diminish. Now, what is this talking about? Well, this is explaining the fact that, let's say a guy is married to a certain wife. Let me turn there. I lost my place here. Give me one second. He's saying, you know, a guy's got a wife, and it's his job to feed that wife, to clothe that wife, and then the duty of marriage, that's basically, you know, talking about what husbands and wives do, you know? And he's basically explaining the fact that if he has a second wife, then he's still responsible for giving, you know, fulfilling his first wife's three needs there that are listed. Okay. So right there, we see clearly that the Bible teaches that it's our job as men, and God is even demanding that we treat our wives in such a way where we don't diminish their food or diminish their clothing or diminish their duty, our duty of marriage toward them. You say, why would you turn to such a bizarre person? You know, all scripture is given by inspiration of God as profitable for doctrine. You know, I'm not afraid of the passage of the Bible. You know, God's law is perfect, and he was dealing with, obviously, realities that existed. God's perfect plan was not followed by people who had a second wife, but he explained, well, look, if you do have two wives, you know, you cannot treat them poorly. And he explains, you know, we could go on and on because he explains other things like, you know, you can't treat the kids of the one wife better than that wife because your life has got to be just and fair and handle that situation. Because even when we do things that are wrong, God doesn't just, you know, throw us under the bus. He still has a plan for our lives, and he still used people in the Bible who had made this mistake of having multiple lives, okay? And so that's what he's explaining here. But that shows that, you know, I should provide for my wife a good standard of living. I'm not saying to be rich or wealthy. The Bible says that having food and arraignment, that we should be there with content. And notice, that's the two things he brings up here, isn't it? You know, maybe I may not be able to provide my wife with a mansion to live in and a fancy vehicle and all the different things, and maybe you can't, but you know, you are demanded by God to provide your wife with three square meals a day, you know, healthy, good food for your wife. Don't send her to McDonald's. You know, don't give her junk to eat or diminish it. You know, put her on a ration. You know, feed your wife. And it's funny because the Bible gets said and it feeds you sacrifice that we should nourish and cherish our wives. You know, what is nourishment? What's nourishment? No, McDonald's is not nourishment. You know, nourishment is nutrition. You know, so we should provide a standard of living, I'm not saying, you know, anything fancy, but you know, to feed our wife quality food and to keep our wife in decent clothing. That's part of our job. It says, that's what God demands of us, to keep her in decent clothing. And then he also said the duty of marriage. You know, part of our job as husbands is to basically have a physical relationship with our wife. And it's not optional. Okay, and you know, people who are single and unmarried, you know, this often boggles the mind that why anyone would have to hear this. And you know, it boggles my mind today. But there are people out there who abstain from this activity within their marriage. It's true. There are people out there today, and go to 1 Corinthians 7, this is where I almost heard you a little bit earlier. This is part of the way that we show love toward our wives. You know, first of all, we need to be a provider. We need to spiritually lead and teach the Bible and be able to answer our wife's spiritual questions. We should be forgiving and not bitter. We should spend time with our wife and build the relationship. But not only that, but we should basically fulfill our wife's physical need. And it says in 1 Corinthians 7, verse number 1, it says, Now concerning the things whereof you wrote unto me, it is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. Let the husband render unto the wife, do but him. Let's likewise also the wife unto the husband. Let the wife have not power of her own body, but the husband. And likewise also, the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. Defraud ye not, one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer, and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency. So right there, the Bible says that we should not defraud our wife, or that our wives should not defraud us of the physical relationship. And you know, that's a pretty strong word, fraud. I mean, what if someone was convicted of fraud? You'd think, well, they wrote a bad check. They told a bunch of lies. Well, you know, part of what you're getting into when you get married is you make that vow that says to have and to hold from this day forward, okay? And that's part of being married. You know, otherwise, why not, why wouldn't my wife just be friends for the rest of her life? You know what I mean? That's the reason why you get married to one person, because that's the difference right there. That's part of it. And so just as much as I should not tell my wife, sorry, no food for you today, I'm saving up for that new bass boat or whatever. You know what I mean? I'm not into fishing. Somebody might relate to that illustration. I don't know anything about fishing. You know, you're going to have to cut back on your meals a little bit. I mean, you know, wouldn't you say that would be defrauding her? Or, you know, I know your clothes are falling apart, but sorry. You know, can't buy you any clothes. But, you know, it's the same thing here. We shouldn't basically abstain from that relationship with our family. And you know why a lot of people have abstained from that relationship with their spouse? Because of bitterness, too. You know, spouses get angry at one another, and then they basically abstain from the marriage bed, as the Bible calls it, and then you know what's going to happen? Basically, it's going to lead to a divorce. It's going to lead to making sure that we keep the relationship with our wife right. And if we follow all these steps that I'm giving you, you're going to have the right relationship with your wife. If you're providing. If you're paying, not saying, you go to work so that you can buy food and clothes for yourself. My wife does not have separate finances where I say, well, this is my money. You better, you go out, if you want to eat, you want to have clothes, go do it yourself. No. It's my job, as a husband, to provide the food and clothes in my house. It's not her job. Why didn't he say in Exodus 21, well, if he gets a second wife, then she gets a second job to pay for it. No. He said, no, it's your job as a husband to pay for the food and raiment in that house. And so, if I'm doing what I'm supposed to do, I'm going to have the right relationship with my wife. And you know, we can blame a lot of problems in the marriage and say, oh, it's all her fault. But wait a minute, who's the leader? You know, the buck stops here. If there's a problem in my house, I'm not going to go around whining about it and say, oh, it's just my wife, and I married the wrong person, and oh, it's just she's this and she's that. You know what? Don't ever, don't ever look at me and whine at me about your wife. Because you know what? That is not a manly attribute to go around and whine and complain and fail to leave. Okay? Because if there's a problem in your house, it's your failure to leave. I mean, who would you blame if our church was wrong? Who would you blame? Ah! It's just these stupid church members. You know, like let's say I'm pastoring this church, right? And let's say nobody goes soloing. Yeah, a bunch of stupid church members don't go soloing. I don't get it. Well, if the church member is not going soloing, there's probably a problem with the leader. You know, because if you look at a church with a strong leader, the people are out soloing. You know what I mean? And let's say you have a church where everybody's worldly and sinful in their lifestyle. The first place I've looked, just stop and think about it for a second. Look at a church, you walk in, everybody's sinful and worldly and ungodly in their lifestyle. Where's the first place you're going to look? Wait a minute. Is this guy preaching on sin? Isn't that the first thing a pastor ever preached on sin? I remember we walked into a church one time. I was with my family when I was a child. You know, I was with my parents. We walked into a church and everybody in the pew, the pastor preached at King James, but everybody in the pew had all different versions. You know, my dad was kind of looking over the pew and he was seeing the NIV and the Living Bible. And my dad said, well, you know, this isn't a good church because he said this pastor is failing to teach. I mean, you know, you can look around at a church. Let's say I walk in a church and all the ladies are dressed wrong and they're dressed contrary to God's word. Who are we going to blame? Ah, there's a bunch of lame women today. No. You're going to look at the pulpit and say, this guy has failed to teach. This guy has failed to preach. Let's say you go to the grocery store and this is important what I'm saying right now. You go to the grocery store and a kid's throwing himself on the ground. Oh, that's a bad, bad kid. No, you're going to say it's a bad, what? A bad parent because you know that that is the one who's responsible. That's the leader. Well, you know, when you see a bad marriage, where's the first place you want to look? Bad husband, bad leader, okay? And this is not an excuse for ladies to be ungodly and to just blame their husband. He's not leading me. But what I'm saying today is that men need to man up and take the responsibility and say, if there's a problem in my house, it's my problem. If there's a problem in my marriage, I'm going to take responsibility for it. I'm failing to lead. I'm failing to teach, okay? And that's not to say that ladies don't do anything wrong or that wives do not commit. But tonight, I'm not preaching to the wives. I'm preaching to the men and I have had other sermons where I preach against the wives that are disobedient. But you know what? Right now, I'm preaching to the men. And I'm saying that the men don't cop out and hide behind it and say, oh, it's just, you don't know what my wife is like or what she's done. They're all like that. Grow up, man up, and take care of the problem. You know, and what I'm saying is, and that was not meant to be insulting. But the point is that we as men need to take the responsibility and say, hey, the buck stops here. You know, we're the leader. We ought to set the example and you know what? Show your wife a lot of love. You know, give your wife a gift. Spend time with your wife. Provide for your wife financially. Show your wife love physically. Show her love by your forgiving attitude and by teaching her the Bible. And you know what? Do all of those things and I think that your marriage will be fine. You know, no matter who you're married to. Honestly. But I think that it's just, it's easier just to point the finger at someone else. And just say, well, she's this and she's that. When you know, you gotta ask yourself, wait a minute, have I really done everything that I was supposed to be doing biblically? Everything that I'm laying out right here? All these different things that I'm showing from the Bible that God commands us to do? You know, if you're not doing all of the above, then you're probably gonna have problems in your marriage. And you can't really blame anybody but yourself there. Look at Proverbs chapter five. Proverbs chapter number five. And look, new marriage is perfect. That's why so many marriages end in divorce. Because, you know, being married is not always easy. It has its ups and downs. It has the really good times and it has some bad times. But you know what? You just gotta stay with it. And you gotta stay till death do us part and keep that vow. And if you put these principles into practice, you're gonna have success. But he says in Proverbs chapter five, verse 15, he says, drink waters out of thine own cistern and running waters out of thine own well. And just to give you the context here, he's talking about before this, you know, adulterous women. And basically women that will try to seduce a man into adultery. Okay? He says in verse 16, let thy fountains be dispersed abroad in rivers and waters and thy streets. Let them be only thine own and not strangers with thee. Let thy fountain be blessed and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. Now, rejoice with the wife of thy youth? That kinda reminds me of Deuteronomy 24-5 about sharing your wife. He says, rejoice with the wife of thy youth. It comes from the word joy. Rejoice. He says, let her be as the loving kind and pleasant throat. Let her breast satisfy thee at all times and be thou ravished always with her love. And why wilt thou, my son, be ravished with a strange woman and embrace the bosom of a stranger? You know, the Bible's telling us here that one way that we can love our wife, too, is by being faithful to our wife. Here, he's talking about embracing the bosom of a stranger. Here, he's talking about committing adultery. And you know, as a husband, we need to be faithful to our wife. And obviously, that means not committing adultery. But you know, as I alluded to this morning, what about our thought life? What about inside of our heart? We need to keep a pure heart where our love and affection is for our wife only and not for other women. Right? We shouldn't have all these feelings toward other women instead of our wife, which is basically covetous things. Instead of being content with the wife that God has given us, oftentimes, men are covetous of someone else's wife. That's why it's even in the Ten Commandments. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife. And we see today men lusting after other women, whether it be on the TV screen or on the billboard. But you know, even if you don't watch TV, which I don't watch TV, and you ought not watch all the worldly prophets on TV, but let's face it. In our lives, as men, we are going to be faced with women that are not dressed properly. We're going to be faced with women whose goal is to seduce, just like he said in Proverbs, the way that they wear the attire of a harlot, the clothing of a harlot, the Bible says in Proverbs 5. And they go out and the Bible says that the adulterous will hunt for the precious life. And so today, when you go to work, or when you're out to eat, or when you're out living your life, there are going to be ladies around that are not dressed right. And there are going to be wicked women out there whose goal is that men would lust after them, whose goal is that they might commit adultery with a married man. It's true. The Bible says that they're out there. And so therefore, you've got to make a decision. As Job said, I made a covenant with my eyes. How then should I think upon a maid? David said that he would look right eye. He didn't want to turn to the right hand or the left and that he didn't want to set any wicked thing before his eyes. We need to decide, you know, let's face it, you're going to see women that are dressed wrong. But are you going to, as Job said, think upon that maid? Or are you going to lust after her and commit adultery with her in your heart? You cannot help in your life but to see women who are dressed wrong. You're going to see. You know, unless you just walk yourself up in a cave somewhere, you're going to see it. You're going to see, especially as we're getting into summertime, you're going to see the short shorts. You're going to see the halter top. You're going to see the, you know. And like, you know, you obviously want to limit your exposure to it. But see, here's the thing. When you see it, do you take a second look or do you look away? You know, just because somebody walks by or just because that billboard is there, you might see it and you can't help that but to see it. But you know what you can help is when you stop and take a second look or when you continue to look or when you think about it and dwell upon it and when you think a lustful thought toward a woman that is not your own. Let me tell you something. I know for a fact, I'll tell you right now, that my wife would not feel loved if I was looking at some other woman. That's not going to make her feel loved. Right? I mean, do you think that ladies feel loved if they found that their husband has pornography? Or if they found that their husband is staring at some other woman? Or staring at some billboard? Or staring at some advertisement? Or staring at some young girl going by? That's not going to make her feel loved because that's going to make her feel like, well, I'm not good at that. So he has to look elsewhere. You know, we have to show our wives love by keeping ourselves only unto them so long as we both shall live. And that includes not just physically. Obviously, we should not embrace the bosom of a stranger. But not only that, we should also keep our mind and our heart in love with her and not someone else. And to be ravished always with her love and not with someone else's. And not always be looking somewhere else. And by the way, the grass is greener on the other side of the fence sometimes. You know, you might think, oh, I wish I had this other wife. It's a foolish thought. You know, because God has blessed you with the wife that you have. You ought to be thankful for her. You ought to, you know, praise God for her. You ought to love her. Spend time with her. Build that relationship. Provide for her. Care for her. Nourish her. Cherish her. Don't look at all the other women out there and lust after them. Have all of that desire only pointed where it ought to be pointed, which is at your lawfully wedded wife. And that's going to make your wife feel a lot more love, I'll tell you right now. Because I'll tell you right now, I wouldn't feel very loved if I thought that my wife was in love with another man. Even if she didn't commit adultery. Just to think that if my wife were infatuated with some other man, or idolized some other man, that wouldn't make me feel loved at all. That'd make me upset. That'd make me angry. Well, it's a two-way street. You know, what if I, you know, this could be silly, but what if I found my wife has some Hollywood star that she's on into? You know what I mean? I mean, I'm using it as a joke, obviously. It's not legit. But let's say I just found, you know, she's just really, and who, what guy, what's the guy that these married women are, think is so cool out in the world in Hollywood? Who's, come on, help me out, worldly ones. Obama. Not Obama. Now that would be, that would be, I wouldn't feel very loved at all. That would be a bummer. So, you know, you know what I'm talking about, though. What's the guy that they think is so, you know, oh, Tom Cruise or something. Is that one of them? Wouldn't that be one that they think is so cute? Brad Pitt. There we go, Brad Pitt. Now we know who's really, you know, looking at these Hollywood stars. But anyway, yeah, thank you. You know, Brad Pitt. What if my wife just went around saying, oh, Brad Pitt is so cool. Brad Pitt is so good looking. Wait a minute, I thought I was good looking. You know, I thought I was cool. I thought I was the guy that you think is so cool. But stop and think about that, guys. And I think if you stop and think about that, maybe then you realize that all things whatsoever you would that men should do to you, that you would even do so under that. And if I don't want my wife idolizing Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise and all this stuff, you know, then I shouldn't be looking at the women stars of this world and thinking that they're so beautiful and they're so wonderful and so talented and so cool. You know, I wouldn't want my wife to be praising some other man to me, telling me how great and how wonderful he is and how good looking he is. You know, I'm a very jealous husband. And every real man is a jealous husband, by the way. God's name is jealous. I'm sick of people, I'm sick of these bunch of feminazis telling me it's wrong to be jealous. Jealous is my middle name. You know, I mean, literally, my wife will say something like, my wife will literally just casually say something like, oh, he's a nice guy. I'm like, what's that supposed to mean? I'm just kidding. But the bottom line is, I don't want her idolizing some other guy. I wouldn't want her to have some, do you think I want her to have some poster of Brad Pitt on the wall in her sewing room? Right about the sewing machine. There's Tom Cruise. You know, but then, but wait a minute. Then why do the guys have out in the garage the bikini poster? Think about that. And you know, a lot of wives today, they'll act like they don't care just because they want to be cool, they want to fit in, and you know, I don't mind if my husband has the bikini calendar out in the, but I guarantee you they're probably hurts them on the inside. That their husband has that bikini calendar out in the garage. That's not love in your wife. You know when you've got a bunch of pictures of everybody else that you think looks better? You know, why do you have to look at other women? That just shows that she isn't loved like she should have. Because all of your love should be directed at your wife when it comes to that aspect of love in your life. And so think about that. If you don't want her to idolize, you know, then you shouldn't have the bikini calendar or the bikini poster or all these other women that you think are so beautiful. And you know, I don't go with my friends at work and say, oh, so this woman's hot. That should never come out of your mouth. So and so on would start, oh she's hot. Oh man, she's beautiful. You know, that shouldn't come out of your mouth. You know, if I'm praising a woman's beauty, it ought to be my wife's beauty. I don't want her saying, oh that guy is so handsome, he's so rugged. You know, that's not going to make me feel very loved. And so I'm not going to say it to her and she's not going to say it to me. You know, look, I'm the only rugged man that you need honey, all right. So anyway, I'm just kidding around. But the bottom line is, we ought to love our lives. You know, and we ought to be thankful that we have a wife that God has blessed us with. And let's not take it for granted. Let's treat her right. You know, treat her first class and do all these things that are listed, not look elsewhere, but just love her, feed her, clothe her, you know, spend time with her, hang out with her, you know, show your love physically to her and no one else. And to keep your thoughts and your heart and your affection, you know, for God, number one, to love him with all the heart and love him more than anyone. But you know what, on this earth, you know, as a man right here, there's no woman that I love more than my wife and there ought never to be another woman. Even if I, well, I just love her in a different way. You know, it's platonic. Plato was a stinking sodomite. That's why he had all these, he was so platonic because he's a fag. Get real. Don't tell me, well, I just, you know, I'm just really close with this guy at the office, but it's just platonic. You know, that's not right. I don't hang on the phone to women that I'm not with. I don't just get together and hang out and just have lunch with women that I'm not married to because, you know what, this is the main woman in my life right here. And yeah, I have other peripheral relationships. I have, you know, relationships with my sisters and my mother and obviously the ladies at church are my sisters in Christ. You're not going to see me getting together with ladies from church and having lunch hanging on some big phone call, you know, talking for hours. You know, you're not going to see me hanging on some big phone call, you know, talking for hours, getting together recreationally. It isn't right. And, you know, that can go for the ladies as well. We need to keep ourselves only under her, man. That's who you, and you know what, that's who you chose. That's who you married. And you say, well, and look, I hope that this doesn't fit anyone's example, but let's say you just say, well, I just don't love my wife. Well, then shame on you because God didn't say that love is some feeling that's going to come over you. He wants you to love your wife. That's your choice to love your wife. And I guarantee you that if you stop and think about it, there's going to be a lot of things that are lovable about your wife that you can focus upon and grow in love with your wife. And get to know your wife more and you'll find more things to love about it. And so don't just have this attitude of, well, you know, the ball and chain or whatever. You know, you need to love and cherish and nourish your wife. Let's borrow this and have a word of prayer. Father, thank you so much for this biblical truth tonight about how to have a good marriage, dear God, and how to be a proper husband. And Lord, I just pray that every husband that's here tonight would take this sermon seriously and really let it sink in. You know, we joked around a little bit, but I just pray that they would really take it seriously and really treat their wife well and treat their wife the way that they would want to be treated. And to love their wife and cherish their wife and please just strengthen the marriages of our church, dear God, and help us to be able to raise children that would bring glory to you. And I just today pray. Amen.