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Alright, so here in 1 Kings chapter 12 we have a story of a young man named Rehoboam. And Rehoboam had a famous father and a famous grandfather. His dad's name was Solomon and his grandfather was David, the kings of Israel. And in 1 Kings 12 we have Rehoboam. Solomon has died and Rehoboam just became the king. And we read there in the few verses that the Bible says that the nation of Israel, they came to him to make him king and when they came to make him king they asked him a question. They said, make thou the grievous service, and I'm sorry I should say they asked him a request, of thy father and thy heavy yoke which he put upon us lighter and we will serve thee. And Rehoboam is a young man who has a very big decision to make. And the reason I chose this story for teen activity or for a teen challenge is because of the fact that you as teenagers are in a state in your life where you're going to have a lot of decisions to make. You've got a lot of big choices to make. You know, really the decisions you make and the habits you form between now and when you get married are going to affect the rest of your life. They're going to either set you up for success or they're going to set you up for failure. And I want to talk to you about taking advice because Rehoboam, he has this decision to make and he does something that's really smart in verse 5. Now I will say this, it's the only smart thing he did in this story, alright? But he does something good in verse 5, the Bible says this, And he said unto them, depart yet for three days, then come again to me, and the people departed. So he said, hey, give me three days to think about it, give me three days to talk to people about it and I'll get back to you. And then I want you to notice what he does in verse 6. And King Rehoboam consulted with the old men. So he went to get advice and to find advice. And the Bible says he consulted with the old men that stood before Solomon his father while he yet lived and said, how do you advise that I may answer this people? So he goes to the old men, these are the men that gave counsel to his father. So his father, King Solomon, had these men that would give him advice, they'd give him counsel. And Rehoboam goes to these old men, again this was a good thing, he said give me three days and I want to get some advice. The fact that he was looking for advice was a good decision that he made. And he goes to these old men, now here's the value and here's what I want to tell you teenagers and I want you to get this. The value of going to the old men for advice was the fact that they had experience. And experience is invaluable and I know you as kids and I was a teenager once and I was, you know, when you're 13 and you're 14 and you're 15 and whatever, you think you've got it all figured out and your parents are stupid and you don't even know how they made it this far in life and all of that. We understand that but here's what you need to understand, older people have something that you don't have. And it's not that they're necessarily smarter than you or though they may be smarter than you or better than you or more talented. They've got this experience and experience is invaluable. He goes to these old men with experience, it says while he yet lived, because they stood with Solomon while he yet lived and he said, how do you advise that I may answer the people? Verse 7, and they spake unto him saying, so here's the advice they gave, they said, if thou wilt be a servant unto this people this day and will serve them and answer them and speak good words to them, then they will be thy servants forever. So he said, look, here's what we think you should do. We think since you're not Solomon and you're kind of the new guy, we think you should be nice. We think you should give in to their request and then you're going to win them over and they're going to be your servants forever. Notice verse 8, but here's where he made his mistake and here's where most young people who mess up their lives oftentimes, especially in this type of setting, in a church setting, make their mistake. The Bible says, but he forsook the counsel of the old men which they had given him and consulted with the young men that were grown up with him. So he went to his friends, he went to his peers, he went to the people that he grew up with, the people that were going through the same experiences and life that he was going through and it says, which stood before him and he said unto them, what counsel give ye that we may answer this people? And isn't this kind of like a typical teenager, right? They've got a big decision to make in life. Maybe they've got to decide what career they're going to go to. Maybe they're thinking about dating or marriage or pursuing some sort of relationship. They might ask their parents, they might ask their pastor, but inevitably they're going to go and ask their friends and that's what Rehoboam did. He went and took the counsel of his friends and he said, what counsel give ye that I may answer this people who have spoken to me saying, make the yoke which thy father did upon us lighter. Verse 10, and the young men that were grown up with him, spake unto him saying, thus shalt thou say unto the people that spake unto thee saying, thy father made our yoke heavy, but make thou it lighter on us and thou shalt say unto them, my little finger shall be thicker than my father's loins. Now, here's what they're basically doing. They're giving the exact opposite of the advice of the old men. And now, whereas my father did laid you with a heavy yoke, I will add to your yoke. My father has chastised you with whips, but I will chastise you with scorpions. And here's the point that I want to make, and I'm not preaching about the actual advice they gave and the lessons we could learn about that and servant leadership and all that. All those are things that we can learn. But here's what I want to teach you teenagers, and I hope you'll get this. When it comes to making decisions in life, and you're going to have to make some decisions in life, you're going to make decisions that are going to affect the rest of your life. When it comes to taking advice from people, you want to take advice from people who have lived their lives not living your same life. I wish there would be some parents that would say amen to that right now. You want to find a mom, a dad, a pastor, a pastor's wife, a godly man or a godly lady in the church who's maybe lived life a little further than you have? Who's maybe had some experiences that you've not had? You want to take advice from people who have lived their lives. You say, yeah, but they're not smarter than I am. They're not better than I am. They're not more talented than I am. They don't have as many friends on Facebook as I have or whatever you think determines making you cool. Here's the point. They have something that you don't have. They have experience. They've lived through life. You say, well, my parents have made a lot of mistakes. Great. They've got a lot of mistakes that they can warn you about to not make in life. Because here's the thing. You can learn from your experience or you can learn from other people's experiences. But when it comes to making decisions in life, you ought to find people who have lived their lives and are not living your same life. Because here's the problem with Rehoboam's friends. The problem with Rehoboam's friends is that none of them had led a kingdom. You understand that? None of them had been anybody's boss. None of them. These old men, they helped Solomon build a great kingdom. I'm sure they did good things and bad things. They had mistakes. And they had that experience to be able to tell him, hey, here's what we think you should do. But he went to guys that had no idea. And here's what I'm telling you. Here's what I'm telling you. When you as a teenager have a big decision to make, maybe about where you're going to education or what sort of education you might get as an adult. Or whether it's marriage, whether it's a career, whether it's moving somewhere or going. You say, well, I'm going to ask my friends. But here's the problem. None of your friends have ever dealt with those issues. They're as clueless as you are in those areas. Where your mom and your dad, your pastor, your pastor's wife. And look, I'm not old. But I'm older than you. And I have a lot to learn. But you say, well, my parents are old. But they've experienced more than you have. So here's what I'm telling you. And here's what I'm trying to help you kids with. When it comes to making decisions, because you're going to make some big decisions. You've got to take advice from people who have lived life, not people who are living your same life, who grew up with you. Because the people that grew up with you are as clueless about life as you are. But I want you to notice a second thing. And I know that sounds rude. I don't know how else to say it. That's just the truth. Here's number two. The problem with Rehoboam's decision making is that he not only took into account the people's experience as to who he was talking to. But he also did not take into account the fact that there was some people who had and some people who had nothing to gain. Notice verse 7, 1 Kings 12, 7. And they spake unto him, saying, If thou wilt be a servant unto the people this day and will serve them and answer them and speak good words to them. These are the old men. This is what they tell Rehoboam. They said, Then they will be thy servants forever. Now here's what's interesting. These were old men who were at the end of their lives. They were at the end of their careers. They literally had nothing to gain from Rehoboam's success or failure. They were already on track for retirement. They were already on track. What they had done in life, they had already accomplished it. And here's what I want you to get from this story. The old men in this story have nothing to gain from Rehoboam's success or failure. They also have nothing to lose. They're old. They're done. They've lived their lives. Rehoboam, however, takes advice from the young men. And here's the interesting thing is that these young men, because they're his peers, because they're coming up with him, they have everything to gain. They're going to gain with Rehoboam. You say, Well shouldn't that make them, they've got some skin in the game, and shouldn't that make them be someone who they can get advice from? But here's the problem. They have everything to gain, but his friends also have nothing to lose. And in this story there's one big loser. His name's Rehoboam. Notice verse 12. So Jeroboam and all the people came to Rehoboam the third day, as the king had appointed, saying, Come to me again the third day. And the king answered the people roughly, and forsook the old men's counsel that they gave him. And spake after the counsel of the young men, saying, My father made your yoke heavy, and I will add to your yoke. My father also chastised you with whips, but I will chastise you with scorpions. Wherefore the king hearkened not unto the people, for the cause was from the Lord, that he might perform his saying, which the Lord spake to Ahijah the Shiloh knight unto Jeroboam the son of Nebat. So when all Israel saw that the king hearkened not unto them, the people answered the king, saying, What portion have we in David? Neither have we inheritance in the son of Jesse. To your tents, O Israel, now we see to thine own house, so Israel departed unto their tents. And here's what I want you to understand, and maybe you don't get that from this passage, but here's what literally happened. Rehoboam lost half the kingdom. In fact, he lost more than half the kingdom. There was 12 tribes that made up the kingdom that David and Solomon reigned over, and 11 of them said, You know what? Forget you. And they went away, and this is a big event in church history, or not church history, but the nation of Israel's history, where the kingdom split. It becomes the northern kingdom, the southern kingdom. Because one young man took advice from his friends, as opposed to the ancient men or the old men, and you say, Yeah, but his friends had something to gain. Yes, but they had nothing to lose, and Rehoboam was the one that had everything to lose. And here's what I want you to understand, young people, is that when it comes to taking advice, you should not only find people who have lived their lives, but you should find people that have nothing to gain from your life. Because guess what? Your mom and dad, they have nothing to gain from your success. Your pastor has nothing to gain from your success. Your pastor's wife has nothing to gain from your success. Godly grandmother or grandfather, aunt, uncle, just godly men and women in this church that maybe have invested themselves into, they have nothing to gain from you. You say, Well, what about my girlfriend? She has something to gain. Yeah, but you know what? At the end of the day, you're going to be the one that loses, and Rehoboam loses. And I'll go ahead and make this application, because I think it's an important application, and we can apply this in all sorts of areas. But let's apply it to this, because all of you, Lord willing, one day are going to get married. And you're going to be in that dating phase and dating stage. And just realize this, just realize this, that you should get advice. And here's the application, here's the takeaway for tonight. Take advice from those who have lived their lives and have nothing to gain from yours. Take advice from those who have lived their lives and have nothing to gain from yours. Because you might find yourself, and look, as a pastor, I've dealt with this so many times, I wish I wouldn't deal with this. But sometimes you see young people, and everybody around them knows, these two should not be getting married, these two should not be getting married, these two should not be getting married. And everybody who's lived their life, and has nothing to gain from their lives, is trying to lovingly, gently say, hey, maybe I ought to slow this down, maybe I ought to think about this. And you have one, you have that girl, or that guy, or whatever the situation, and they're like, no, no, let's do this now, let's do this fast, let's slow down. Because they've got something to gain, but you're the one that'll lose. You understand what I just said? When it comes to taking advice, you've got to take advice from those who have lived their lives, and have nothing to gain from yours. Or you could keep doing what you're doing, and messing things up, and making bad decisions, and wake up one day hoping that your kids would listen to you because you've made a lot of mistakes, and if they would listen to you, they could gain something from it. And here's all I'm telling you, if you want to go further, faster, if you want to make decisions in your life that are good decisions, you will consider the source of your advice. And you will look at individuals, and look, I'm just telling you right now, mom and dad have lived longer than you, and have nothing to gain from you. They just love you. They just want your success. The old men, those that have gone further, they see things that maybe you don't see, they understand things that maybe you just don't understand, it's not because you're dumb, it's just because you don't have experience. And they're trying to warn you. They're trying to help you. And they're just trying to tell you and say, hey look, I don't think this is the right decision, I don't think this is the right move, this is not the right play for you right now. And just consider this, when someone who's lived longer and has nothing to gain from you gives you advice you don't want to hear, you might want to take it. Because at the end of the day, Rehoboam, it is you that loses. So take advice from those who have lived life longer than you. And take advice from those who have nothing to gain from you. Because look, and I know teenagers sometimes don't understand this, because you're kind of in this odd area of life where you're not a kid, and we understand that, you're not a child. But you're not quite an adult. You maybe have the strength of an adult, maybe even some of the liberties of the adult, some of the money that the adults have, but you don't have the weighing responsibility of an adult. And you kind of find yourself in this little area of life where you're just kind of in limbo. Just realize this, realize that there are people, adults around you, they're busy. They've got jobs and careers. These ancient men, I'm sure these old men, they had people to care for, they had responsibilities. The fact that there are adults in your life who are busy and they're trying to weigh into your life just means one thing. They love you. Because they have no other reason to invest the time and energy, the resources, the talks, the time they put into you. They have no other reason, there's nothing for them to gain from it other than they just care about you. So if you're smart, and I'm hoping you are, you'll learn to take advice from those who live their lives and have nothing to gain from yours. Because that's where the best advice will come from, even when it's the advice that you don't want to hear. Let's bow our heads and have a word of prayer. Heavenly Father, thank you Lord for your word, Lord. I pray that you would help these kids. Lord, I know these kids love you and they love the Lord. We've got great teenagers here, Lord, but I pray you'd help them because they've got a lot of decisions to make. Big decisions. And they can just go on their merry way making the decisions they're making and ruining their lives. Or they could leverage some of the experience of people around them who love them. And Lord, I pray that you would help us as the old men, the older ladies weighing into the lives of these kids. Lord, I pray that you would give us wisdom and discernment to be able to guide them and help them. Lord, I pray that you'd help these kids, help these kids to just realize when it comes to making big decisions in life, to take advice from those who have lived life a little longer and have nothing to gain from their lives. Because their advice is just advice that's coming from a heart of love and compassion and even a little worry. Lord, I pray that you'd give these kids the courage to make the right decisions in life, giving them the wisdom and discernment to know what to do and the courage to do it. In the matchless name of Christ we pray, amen.