The end is near, or so we're told.
Perhaps Jesus Christ will return before I even finish this sentence.
It appears the reasons for Christ's imminent return vary greatly.
But as long as you believe it could be now, you're in the club.
Whether you're pre-Trib, Preterist, Amillennial, Buddhist, Muslim, Jew, or a believer in an alien reptile takeover,
the prevailing narrative is that the worst is not on the horizon.
But rather, the next god-like savior to appear will come to redeem the planet.
It's like a Venn diagram with immanency in the middle.
I guess the question of the century rests on who is coming next and what we should be looking for.
Or is the end really coming soon?
YouTube prophets would have you believe that they finally cracked the code on the next doomsday date,
and not simply stolen the idea from the expiration of their most recent milk carton,
believing it was actually a sign from God.
They proclaim that we're in Daniel's 70th week right now.
Next week will be the sixth trumpet, and the vials are on deck.
Yet those facing the biggest challenge, maybe Raid's corporate marketers,
attempting to replace the label ant and roach on a can of pesticide
with a new title of gold-crowned, iron-breast-plated lion teeth locusts from hell,
especially considering America's supply chain issues.
Thanks, Kamala.
Even more terrifying is the idea that the man of sin is already amongst us.
Is it the Pope? George Soros? Elon Musk? Bill Gates?
Or maybe even his ex-husband, Melinda? Ugh.
It doesn't end there.
Fox News and talk radio shows warn that the newest booster shot is the mark of the beast,
and masks are the abomination of desolation.
Today, the preaching behind pulpits sounds more like the latest weekly world news headlines
rather than the two-edged sword of the King James Bible.
Perhaps the God of the universe has already given us the answers
rather than relying on the belligerent screaming of Alex Jones and David Icke,
peddling the newest conspiracy of the day.
Why should we assume that those who don't believe the Bible,
and are even convinced that they are Jesus, will have the greatest revelation of all time?
The reality is truth is only as reliable as its source.
To rephrase Joshua's favorite quote,
as for me and my house, we will have the Baptist Bias.