Music
Hello, welcome to Sure Foundation Baptist Church. We're gonna go ahead and get started. Let's turn to page 401 in our blue hymn books.
We're gonna sing the solid rock, page 401. Blue hymn books. Page 401, the solid rock.
Alright, let's sing it out loud on the first, page 401, the solid rock.
My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus' blood and righteousness. I dare not trust the sweetest frame, but wholly lean on Jesus' name.
On Christ the solid rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand, all other ground is sinking sand.
When darkness fails his lovely face, I rest on his unchanging grace. In every high and stormy gale my anchor holds within the veil.
On Christ the solid rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand, all other ground is sinking sand.
His oath is covenant, his blood support me in the whelming flood. When all around my soul gives way, he then is all my hope and stay.
On Christ the solid rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand, all other ground is sinking sand.
When he shall come with trumpet sound, oh, may I then in him be found. Dressed in his righteousness alone, fall as to stand before the throne.
On Christ the solid rock I stand, all other ground is sinking sand, all other ground is sinking sand.
Well, we're doing favorites tonight, so if you got favorites, raise your hand, I'll pick you. Jack, I always see your hand first. Ninety-nine, alright.
Page ninety-nine, Beneath the Cross of Jesus, page ninety-nine, Beneath the Cross of Jesus, sing it out loud on the first.
Beneath the Cross of Jesus, I fain would take my stand, The shadow of a mighty rock within a weary land,
A home within the wilderness, a rest upon the way, From the burning of the noontide heat and the burden of the day.
Chris, page 492, Dwelling in Beulah Land, sing it out loud on the first.
Far away the noise of strife upon my ear is falling, Then I know the sins of earth be set on every hand.
Doubt and fear and things of earth in vain to me are calling, None of ye shall move me from Beulah Land.
I'm living on the mountain underneath a cloudless sky, Praise God, I'm drinking at the fountain that never shall run dry.
O yes, I'm feasting on the manna from a bountiful supply, For I am dwelling in Beulah Land.
Page 239, What a Friend We Have in Jesus, sing it out loud on the first.
What a Friend We Have in Jesus, all our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry everything to God in prayer!
O what peace we often forfeit, O what needless pain we bear!
O because we do not carry everything to God in prayer!
Holy, holy, holy, page 70, let's sing it out loud on the first.
Holy, holy, holy, Lord God Almighty, Early in the morning our song shall rise to Thee.
Holy, holy, holy, merciful and mighty, God in three persons, blessed Trinity.
601, Battle Hymn of the Republic.
Alright, this one starts out fast, so you better keep up.
Battle Hymn of the Republic, sing it out loud on the first.
Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord, He is trampling out the vintage where the grapes of wrath are stored.
He hath loosed the faithful lightning of His terrible swift sore, His truth is marching on.
Glory, glory, hallelujah, glory, glory, hallelujah, glory, glory, hallelujah, His truth is marching on.
Alright, two more this evening, right here.
66, you guys liked the hymns this morning, huh?
Pharisee Lord Jesus, page 66.
Pharisee Lord Jesus, sing it out on the first.
Thee will I honor Thou my soul's glory, joy, and crown.
Alright, last one, then we'll have our announcements.
Ramon?
208.
Standing on the Promises, page 208.
Sing it out on the first.
Standing on the promises of Christ my King, through eternal ages let His praises ring.
Glory in the highest I will shout and sing.
Standing on the promises of God.
Standing, standing, standing on the promises of God my Savior.
Standing, standing, I'm standing on the promises of God.
We'll have our announcements.
Good evening, everybody. Welcome to Shore Foundation Baptist Church.
Welcome you back to the evening service and get some announcements to make and then we'll move on with the service.
If you need a bulletin, we're out of bulletins, but you can just listen.
Does anybody need a bulletin?
If you don't, okay, cool.
Alright, well, we're out of bulletins anyway, so it doesn't matter.
On our front cover we have a verse of the week.
It says, let your light so shine before men that they may see your good works and glorify your Father, which is in heaven.
That's Matthew 5 16, great scripture there.
And our services, our Sunday morning preaching service is 10 30 a.m.
Our Sunday evening service is at 3 30 p.m.
We're going to the book of Exodus, but today I'm going to preach a different sermon, a standalone sermon.
And it's how to leave a church the right way is what the title of the sermon is.
So it's a different type of sermon, but I think it's needful.
And Thursday, our Bible study is at 6 30 p.m.
And we are in the book of Hebrews.
We just did Hebrews chapter 1, so it's a great time to jump back into Thursday nights and start fresh with the new book.
Kind of just did the overview and preached about how the Son of God is supreme to the angels.
He's supreme to everything, but it was basically the supremacy of the Son of God.
And so we'll be in chapter two this next this coming Thursday here.
And our so many times are listed below. We did go out so many today. It was a beautiful day out there.
It was nice and warm until the sun went that fiery ball that sometimes appears in the northwest,
went behind a cloud and then it kind of got cold again. But it was nice. It was beautiful.
We definitely got our exercise in.
So today was exercise is one of your things. And you went soloing and you got to definitely take some steps today.
So did anybody have a salvation out there today?
Amen. All right. That was a rough neighborhood.
So Tatiana, praise the Lord. So we had a salvation. Number one. Good job.
All right. And if you look down, you can see the salvation's for last year.
It was actually 303. I guess I was wrong.
Those three or three for the year for last year, excuse me, one for this year.
And of course, we rolled back everything. Our attendance last week is there at the bottom of the page.
And then on the upcoming events, I'm going to go through this really quickly.
We already had pizza to the service. So today's done. OK, I'm moving on.
Jennie, if you guys are pizza bombed, it's my fault. I'm sorry.
But January 1st, that's today. The New Testament challenge starts.
And if you didn't get one of these sheets, then you can just walk up to the pulpit after the service.
Is there still some over there? Does anybody need one of these?
If you do, just come up and grab one from here.
But it basically lets you check off all the days for 31 days to read the whole New Testament.
But there's a couple of grace period days in there.
If you read nine chapters a day, you'll get the whole New Testament done in actually 29 days.
So by that schedule. But the challenge is 30 days or 31-day challenge, the end of the month.
And you'll get a nice prize for completing the challenge.
And we already had one person get it done. Yeah, Sean Conlon.
Everybody praise him. No, I'm just kidding. He did a great job, though. That's hard.
He didn't listen to my sermon this morning, but I mean, he got his Bible reading done.
So that's OK. I'm just kidding. But yeah, good job.
I mean, that's that's definitely a record, I think. So day one, he's done.
So now don't stop with that goal. You've got to continue on.
And, you know, you've got to continue to attain the other goals that you have for this year.
But yeah, so one's one's done. So but the rest of you all have 20 or 30 more days to get it done.
So anyway, and then the men's leadership class is going to meet here at six thirty p.m. on January 10th.
That's a Tuesday, January 15th. Pastor Burzins will be here preaching from Stronghold Baptist Church in Atlanta, Georgia.
He's preaching both services on Sunday. So it'll be great to have Pastor Burzins here.
He's been a friend of mine for a long time. He's a really great guy and a great preacher, great pastor.
And I'm looking forward to having him. January 17th is the sewing class here at the church building.
That'll be at 4 p.m. That's on a Tuesday. Also see Mrs. Harrington for any questions.
And then January 29th is the potluck after the morning service and men's preaching night for the evening service.
So if you're wanting to preach, of course, you have an opportunity on the fifth Sunday to do that.
So February 11th is the married couple sweetheart banquet. And that's where we, you know, we play we play a fun game.
And last year was more fun because I wasn't doing it. And I really got to just kind of let my hair down and enjoy the night.
All the hair that I have, you know, but it was fun.
And so hopefully I can talk Pastor Mejia into running the game this year so I don't have all that pressure,
you know, of making spouses sleep on their couch that night and all that kind of stuff because it's the not so newlywed game.
And so basically you have to just kind of, you know, know what your spouse is going to say.
And if you don't, it's not going to be a good night after the night. I'm just kidding.
But anyway, it's a good time. We always have a good time at the banquet.
Pastor Mejia is preaching a short sermon for us and then he'll be preaching on the 12th all day.
So both services for Sunday. His whole family is going to be here.
So make sure you make them feel welcome when they come up and definitely happy to have him too.
He's a great friend of mine.
And March 5th through 9th, we're leaving here Sunday night, coming back Thursday.
And it's the Next Generation Youth Rally at Verity Baptist Church in Sacramento, California.
I think Pastor Anderson is preaching there. Pastor Mendez is preaching there.
There's going to be all kinds of events, but it's mainly for teens. So 13 and up.
Is that right? Am I right about that? 13 to 19, I think is the age group.
And obviously if you're going with your whole family, you're more than welcome to go.
But when it comes to the activities and events, I think that they're just holding that over for the kids that are older.
So anyway, of course I encourage parents to go.
I am driving a van down there on Sunday night and then I'm driving back.
I have a CDL. I'm a professional driver.
Class A with trips and tanker endorsement.
Hazmat tanker endorsement.
So anyway, you can trust me.
All the guys that drove with me today are like, I don't know about that.
Anyway, that's the upcoming events.
And obviously further on down the line, the Detroit Sony Marathon in Detroit, of course.
And then all the other stuff. We've got a lot of stuff going on.
And we're a family integrated church. That means the children and infants are welcome during the church services.
Please utilize the mother baby rooms and dad baby room for your convenience.
They're the rooms in the backs of the room. They say what they are.
And you can take your children in that room if you need to.
If they become really distracting or disruptive, please take them there or whatever your needs may be.
You can still hear the services. You can still see the services.
And there's comfortable seating in there. So they're not nap rooms for adults, though.
All right. And then, yeah, because I know everybody's tired tonight, so I don't want to hear it.
But anyway, rockers and gliders for pregnant nursing mothers and elders only.
Please reserve the back rows for families with young children and no men in the mother baby rooms and moms in the dad baby room.
All right. During the church services and no unattended children in any area of the building, please keep an eye on your children.
And no food in the assembly area. That is from tonight on.
Okay. And escorts to your vehicles are available by the ushers upon request.
And the donations information is down below. The tithes and offerings that we received in December at the bottom of the page.
We sang happy birthday. I sang happy birthday to Kylie, even though it wasn't her birthday this morning.
It was actually Kyle's birthday. And I was getting all kinds of flack from my family over that.
And people after the service, you know it's not really Kylie's birthday.
I knew that. I was just testing you guys to see if you knew.
Anyway, that's all I have for announcements. But if you're a first time visitor, we're very happy that you're here.
And we do have some gift bags on the other side of the partition wall over there.
On your way out, just grab one of those bags or, you know, however many your family needs.
We've got plenty of them over there.
You can grab one of those as a token of our appreciation for you being a first time guest.
And we know that you have other options you can go to. And we're thankful that you're here tonight.
And hopefully you enjoy the services or anything you need after the service, please feel free to come talk to me.
If anybody isn't 100% sure that they're on their way to heaven, we'd like to show you what the Bible says it takes to go to heaven.
And we'd like to take the Bible and just show you after the service if you're not 100% sure.
We can make sure that you know that before you leave today.
And we can also baptize you if you want.
But I would need to talk to you first.
So that's all I have for announcements. Let's sing another song and then we'll receive the offering.
All right, let's all turn to page 329. We're going to sing God Leads Us Along.
Page 329. Blue Hymn Books, page 329. God Leads Us Along.
Singing now on the first.
In shady green pastures so rich and so sweet, God leads his dear children along.
Where the water's cool flow bays the weary one's feet, God leads his dear children along.
Some through the water, some through the flood, some through the fire, but all through the blood.
Some through great sorrow, but God gives a song in the night season and all the day long.
Sometimes on the mount where the sun shines so bright, God leads his dear children along.
Sometimes in the valley in darkest of night, God leads his dear children along.
Some through the water, some through the flood, some through the fire, but all through the blood.
Some through great sorrow, but God gives a song in the night season and all the day long.
Though sorrows befall us and Satan opposed, God leads his dear children along.
Through grace we can conquer, defeat all our foes, God leads his dear children along.
Some through the water, some through the flood, some through the fire, but all through the blood.
Some through great sorrow, but God gives a song in the night season and all the day long.
Away from the mire and away from the clay, God leads his dear children along.
Away up in glory, eternity's day, God leads his dear children along.
Some through the water, some through the flood, some through the fire, but all through the blood.
Some through great sorrow, but God gives a song in the night season and all the day long.
Amen. Great singing. At this time we're going to receive our offering.
Brother Sean, can you bless the offering for us?
Heavenly Father, I thank you for this day, Lord. I just thank you for this church and this soul saved today.
I pray that you would bless this offering, Lord.
I pray that you bless both the gift and the giver.
Praise things in Jesus' name. Amen.
Praise the Lord.
All right, good afternoon. Would you turn with me to the book of Matthew, the book of Matthew chapter 18, please?
Matthew chapter 18. You're over 40 readers up. Matthew chapter 18.
In the book of Matthew chapter 18, the Bible reads,
At the same time came the disciples unto Jesus, saying, Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?
And Jesus called a little child unto him, and set him in the midst of them, and said,
Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven.
Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.
And whoso shall receive one such little child in my name receiveth me.
But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me?
It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea.
Woe unto the world because of offenses, for it must needs be that offenses come, but woe to that man by whom the offense cometh.
Wherefore if thy hand or thy foot offend thee, cut them off, and cast them from thee.
It is better for thee to enter into life halt or maimed, rather than having two hands or two feet to be cast into everlasting fire.
And if thine eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee.
It is better for thee to enter into life with one eye, rather than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire.
Take heed that ye despise not one of these little ones.
For I say unto you that in heaven their angels do always behold the face of my Father which is in heaven.
For the Son of Man is come to save that which was lost.
How think ye, if a man have an hundred sheep, and one of them be gone astray?
Doth he not leave the ninety and nine, and goeth into the mountains, and seeketh that which is gone astray?
And if so be that he find it, verily I say unto you, he rejoiceth more of that sheep than of the ninety and nine which went not astray.
Even so, it is not the will of your Father which is in heaven that one of these little ones should perish.
Moreover, if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone.
If he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother.
But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.
And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church.
But if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican.
Verily I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven.
And whatsoever ye shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.
Again I say unto you, that if two of you shall agree on earth as touching anything that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven.
For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.
Then came Peter to him and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Till seven times?
Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee until seven times, but until seventy times seven.
Therefore is the kingdom of heaven likened unto a certain king which would take account of his servants.
And when he had begun to reckon, one was brought unto him which owed him ten thousand talents.
But for as much as he had not to pay, his lord commanded him to be sold and his wife and children and all that he had in payment to be made.
The servant therefore fell down and worshipped him, saying, Lord, have patience with me and I will pay thee all.
Then the lord of that servant was moved with compassion and loosed him and forgave him the debt.
But the same servant went out and found one of his fellow-servants which owed him a hundred pence.
And he laid hands on him and took him by the throat, saying, Pay me that thou owest.
And his fellow-servant fell down at his feet and besought him, saying, Have patience with me and I will pay thee all.
And he would not, but went and cast him into prison till he should pay the debt.
So when his fellow-servant saw what was done, they were very sorry and came and told unto their lord all that was done.
Then his lord, after that he had called him, said unto him, O thou wicked servant, I forgave thee all that debt because thou desirest me.
Shouldest not thou also have had compassion on thy fellow-servant, even as I had pity on thee?
And his lord was wroth and delivered him to the tormentors till he should pay all that was due unto him.
So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one, his brother their trespasses.
Brother Alex, can you pray for us?
Heavenly Father, thank you for your word.
And we ask that you feel pastored with the Holy Spirit that you treat boldly to us and give us here a solution and put your word to work in our lives.
In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.
Amen. So like I told you, I was going to preach a stand-alone sermon tonight.
Normally it would be in Exodus and we'll be back in there next week.
But I felt the need to preach a sermon about this because, you know, people come and go.
If you notice that there's not the same people here as when we first started the church, a lot of the people are still the same people.
But we've lost a lot of people too.
And people come and go and not everybody that leaves our church is bad.
And I'm not saying that, but sometimes people just leave and sometimes people leave in a wrong way.
And so I want to preach about how to leave a church the right way.
How to leave a church the right way.
Now nobody better leave tonight, all right?
I'm not trying to get you to leave.
I'm trying to get you to, if you ever did leave, that you would at least do it the proper way.
Because there's a right way and a wrong way to do things.
And, you know, a lot of times the enemies of churches like ours will do insurrections and try to, you know, split the church and bring a whole bunch of people and take them with them and things like that.
And usually that's an earmark of somebody being bad, okay?
If they're trying to drag everybody out, they're making campaigns, emailing everybody in the church, you know, outside of normal church meetings and services, you know, that...
And, you know, maybe sometimes people are just misguided. Maybe they're not bad.
But I just, you know, everybody in here tonight, by the end of the sermon, should at least know how to do things the correct way when it comes to handling grievances with me as a pastor or any pastor.
And handling grievances amongst yourselves because sometimes people leave because of somebody else in the church.
I mean, how many times have you knocked on a door and they'll go, well, I just can't... I had a bad experience in church and so I'm never coming back.
And that's sad too. Like, I don't want people to have bad experiences here at our church and not understand how to deal with the grievances and how to handle things.
Well, Matthew 18 is a very famous chapter for handling grievances in the church and Jesus addresses the way things should be done.
So I want to start this sermon by, number one, showing you how to properly address grievances with fellow church members.
And if you notice at the end of the chapter, it talked about this guy that was forgiven a great debt by his Lord.
Obviously, in that parable, that Lord is God, okay, for the picture of that parallel.
And the servant that's forgiven all these things is obviously the person that gets saved. God forgives them for all these sins that they've committed.
And then there's somebody that's a fellow servant of theirs that's a church member, so to speak, or a fellow Christian.
And that person owes them something and instead of being forgiving like they were forgiven,
then over something very minor, they grab that person by the throat and tell them that they need to pay everything that they owe.
And then when God hears about that, when God sees people acting like that, he gets very angry, doesn't he?
It says he hands them to the tormentors.
And basically, God is going to punish people that respond and act in those types of ways.
So I think it's important for me to kind of outline why and how you're supposed to handle grievances amongst yourself
because that kind of sets up the rest of the sermon so you can kind of understand how to address grievances in the church
because I think that this is a major failure in a lot of Christians.
It's a major failure in a lot of churches, okay?
And because Matthew 18 is not followed the way it's supposed to be followed, then things build up and stack up on people,
and then finally they blow their top, and then they have like ten grievances with one person.
Or things are going back and forth.
And if someone would just do what Matthew 18 says, then there would be a lot less problems in churches.
So look at verse number 15.
The Bible says,
Moreover, if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and everybody else in the church.
Is that what it says?
What does it say?
It says thee and him alone.
So it's between you and that person.
It's not between you and everybody else in the church,
or because you can't handle just confronting somebody that you go and tell other people in the church
so that there's a campaign against them but you're too scared to do what the Bible actually says to do here.
What's it say?
If somebody does you wrong in church, you're supposed to take that fault and go to that person by themselves.
Isn't that what it says?
This is Jesus talking last time I checked, right?
If he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother.
So you go and this is a confrontation, isn't it?
There's nothing wrong with confronting people, but obviously you want to do it in the right spirit.
If you're offended, people, their tempers flare and they get feelings and all this other stuff,
but it should be just, obviously maybe wait to cool down before you go right to them.
Because if you're angry and you confront someone right away sometimes,
obviously just have some discretion about how you do it, where you do it, who you do it in front of.
Because if you just blast someone and everybody else can hear what you're saying, is that thee and him alone?
No, it's not.
So this is a private thing here.
And I would also say this, because it's saying he, you know, obviously it's using the male pronouns here.
Thee and him alone.
So I don't really think it's proper for a man to go and rebuke somebody else's wife.
If you have a problem with somebody else's wife, you should go to that husband and that husband corrects his wife.
That's the way it should work.
If a woman has a problem with another man, you should go to your husband and say, hey, will you please handle this?
And then those things should be worked out in that way.
If ladies have problems with each other, same thing, you can go to each other or whatever.
And obviously there's lots of different scenarios, but I'm not preaching every scenario tonight.
I'm just telling you, what does the Bible say?
What does the Bible say?
The simplest form of Matthew 18 is that you go to that person yourself.
Not spreading it everywhere, not getting all your friends to agree with you.
But this is what happens most of the time.
And this is why I said a lot of grievances where people will leave a church, or a lot of grievances within the church where people have sore feelings against other people, or I don't like that person, or this, you always have something bad to say about that person.
It's not right.
You should get it right the way that Jesus says to do it.
And yeah, it's not easy to tell someone to their face, because in our culture, there's a lot of backhanded things that happen, and people just don't want to be mean.
They'll say, I don't want to be mean.
You know what's being mean is going around and talking about that person behind their back all the time.
That's mean.
Saying something to somebody's face is right.
Now it says, but if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.
If they don't want to hear that they've offended you, they've done something bad to you, and they don't want to hear it, they're just denying that it happened, or they're arguing with you about it, and you know for sure that it's something that they've wronged you in.
Because sometimes people are mad about things that aren't realistic either.
You know, sometimes people, you know, they get offended over things that they really shouldn't be offended about.
It's not saying that this person's always right, but at least, you know, you're telling that person your grievances, and if you feel strongly enough that where you need to bring the two or three witnesses in, that's the next level, right?
That's ramping things up a little bit, and it's a little uncomfortable.
So then you want people to be able to hear what's being said, and then it says that every word may be established.
So why is that happening? Because you want witnesses to know exactly what you're saying so that that person can't go around and twist what you've said to them, and so that's why you would need that situation to happen.
And it says, and if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church. But if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as a heathen man and a publican.
So if someone's just wronging someone, then they get the, you know, they won't hear them, the witnesses come, they won't hear that, it gets brought before the church, and just let me tell you something right now.
You're not going to just walk up in the middle of the service and have some shootout with a bunch of church members without me knowing about it.
Because I'm the pastor of the church, everything, the church services, if you've noticed, they're directed decently and in order. We start out with a couple songs, we start with some prayer.
You know, we have everything as orderly, and this isn't just a free for all where anybody can just walk up and start reading poetry, or playing their guitar, or whatever.
This is an orderly, fashioned church. So if it becomes to the point where even when the two or three witnesses get involved, I would like to be notified that this is happening.
I don't want people just going around rebuking everybody and getting their witnesses and, you know, if it gets to this point, if it gets to point two, I need to know about it.
If it goes to point three, where the church needs to hear about it, that's not you saying, well I brought the witnesses so I figured I'd better tell the whole church about it.
That's not what it's talking about. It needs to be brought before the church and who's going to be the one that brings this before the church? It's going to be me.
Okay? So, and then it says that they should let them be as a heathen man and a publican.
If the pastor and the whole church has judged the situation, which I don't know that we've ever had a full-blown Matthew 18 situation in our church like this, but this is what the Bible teaches to do.
So obviously Jesus put guidelines in there for us to be able to run the church correctly, and there are going to be grievances. You all are sinners.
I'm a sinner. You're all sinners. And so sinful people have issues. And some people just don't get along with other people and it's just that way.
But there are ways to address these types of grievances. So then that person is to be kicked out of the church because they've done something wrong that they won't fess up to or pony up to.
Again, this is a serious issue. This isn't like your kid stole my kid's crayon or something. Alright? These are things that would be serious.
Your kid offended me. They looked at me and called me a doo-doo head or something. Like obviously that needs to be addressed too, but you better not ever do that kids, right?
But anyway, so this is how the situation works with Matthew 18. So how to properly address grievances with fellow church members is something we need to know.
This is something we need to address correctly. It says, verily I say unto you whatsoever ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven and whatsoever ye shall loose on earth shall be loose in heaven.
So what God's saying is that whatever the church decides here on earth, he's holding to that up in heaven.
So it's not just, and I think that God is happy when we judge correctly in the church. People are like, you're not supposed to judge! Jesus said not to judge! Don't judge!
It's like the only verse that people that don't go to church know. You're not judged not!
But the Bible teaches that we're supposed to judge. There's a book in the Bible called Judges. We have judges in our land. Do you not believe in judges?
I mean that's just weird. You judge how far away you are from each car when you're driving. Some of you are like this close.
But we judge every day. And the Bible says we're supposed to put them as the least esteem of the church to judge in a situation rather than to put it into the hands of an ungodly, heathen judge.
So now look at Proverbs chapter 9 verse 8. And sometimes we have to get a little stern with people because sometimes people don't have a clue.
And I get that, but I would say that before you go to rebuke mode that you should be the reprove mode.
But you can tell someone they're wrong without being a jerk about it. And I'm not saying you're a jerk if you rebuke them because the Bible's saying that rebuke is a good thing in certain situations.
I'm just saying you don't have to go to DEFCON 3 every time someone wrongs you and rebuke them.
Rebuke is to sternly say that someone's wrong. Like you're yelling at them or screaming at them or just like really rough.
But look at Proverbs 9 it says, verse 8, reprove not a scorner lest he hate thee. Rebuke a wise man and he will love thee.
So when you rebuke someone for the thing that they did wrong and that person's wise and they can take that rebuke, that's a good thing.
So sometimes people need to be rebuked and it's just the way it is. But like in the climate of 2023 America, you know, people would rather go any other way than to just be straight up and tell someone what's up.
And I notice that this happens a lot with ladies. It happens with men where they just will let someone power over them and just say whatever they want and they're afraid to speak back to them.
And it's just like sometimes you gotta make a stand. When someone is just mistreating you and that every time that you reply back to them it's some snarky, mean, rude thing,
you can either, you don't have to confront people, but I'll say this, don't go around telling everybody that this person's doing this, this and that when you won't even say it to their face.
It's just like, and you're like, well I'm not confrontational. Well I understand that, well then just say, I don't, you know, I'm not going to talk about this or I don't want to talk to you or whatever.
You can just walk away from a situation obviously, but don't go around telling everybody else that someone has offended you and you've never told that person to their face one time that you're offended by them.
Because, and the reason why I'm bringing this point up is because I just think it's really important that if we do things the biblical way there's going to be a lot less grievances,
a lot less hurt feelings that build up because things can build up and people get bitter and people get upset and when you just let things stew and get worse and worse and more and more pressure,
people just erupt and then it turns into a hot mess, doesn't it? And so, you know, I'm the type of person that, I used to be the type of person that lets things build up.
Obviously I've changed a lot as I've gotten older and obviously as I've read the Bible more, you know, and I'm not really a person that likes to have confrontation either.
Nobody really likes to have confrontations. I mean, I guess some people do, alright? Some people like conflict, right?
But I just don't understand it because that's just not my nature. I'm not someone that likes to just have conflict with people and be fighting and arguing.
I know that I don't have that reputation online but, you know, preaching behind the pulpit and how you are is, you know, it can be different because people only see the sound bites and the one minute atheist clips and whatever.
But, so the point is, is that I just think that if people would do the right thing first, then it would squash a lot of problems in churches.
And this is kind of the groundwork for the rest of the sermon. Now the Bible says in Psalm 119, 165, and let me just tell you this.
You know, if you're just easily offended over everything, Psalm 119, 165, you can turn there real quick. We've got a little bit of time here.
Psalm 119, 165, it's the longest chapter in the whole Bible. Obviously 165 verses there.
But it says, Great peace have they which love thy law, and nothing shall offend them.
So, if you're just easily offended, little snowflake about every single thing, then the Bible says, you know, if you love the Bible, if you love God's law, then nothing is going to offend you.
Obviously, I'm not saying nothing will offend you and nothing ever should, but the Bible, I mean that's a pretty high benchmark to meet right there, isn't it?
Nothing shall offend you, but people get offended all the time, don't they? So obviously not everybody is able to receive this, but it's still true, isn't it?
So, you know, don't be so easily offended over every little thing. Let transgressions pass by sometimes. You don't have to right every wrong.
What if I told you that you can forgive somebody for doing something to you without ever addressing it with them? Is it really that big of a deal?
If it isn't that big of a deal, then why do you have to say something?
But again, if you are offended, the Bible gives you Matthew 18 and tells you how to deal with it, right?
So, it's not real hard, what I'm teaching right here. And, you know, the Bible says in 1 Corinthians chapter 13 that charity suffereth long and is kind.
Charity envieth not and vonteth not itself, is not puffed up, doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil.
So look, if you have a charitable heart, if you have a charity towards your brothers and sisters in Christ, and charity is another word for love,
you love your brothers and sisters in Christ, the Bible commands you to love your brothers and sisters in Christ.
So, if you have charity, if you don't have charity, you can go soul winning five times a week, you can read your Bible in 24 hours,
and go on all these huge marathon missions trips, and you can give money to the poor, and give your body to be burned and all this other stuff,
but if you don't have charity, you're nothing. You're nothing.
So, you should have some love for the people that you are with every single week, you know, three or four hours or even more a week.
You know, we spend a lot of time together, and obviously offenses are going to come, but you don't have to get offended about every little thing.
And, you know, try having some charity in your heart and stop trying to, you know, if you're a person that's confrontational and you know the people that you can pick on
that aren't going to say anything back, you're wrong for doing that too. That's not charitable, is it?
So, you know, I was talking this morning about having goals and putting yourself a check.
Hey, if you're a confrontational person in here, and you just have to right every wrong and snap off on people all the time, and all that kind of stuff,
well, maybe you should consider changing your ways in that direction, and start being a little bit nicer to people, and then you might have friends.
Because, look, he that shows himself, you know, wants to be a good friend, shows himself friendly, right?
So if you're friendly with people, then they're going to be friendly with you, and they're going to want to be around you, but nobody wants to be around Grumple Stillskin all the time.
Or someone that's always going to just snap on them for nothing, you know? Nobody wants to hang out with somebody like that, so I would suggest trying to be a little bit nicer if that's you.
But, you know, the problem is, though, is that people don't want to address things correctly in church, and it causes problems.
So, that's number one. Number two, and obviously that has nothing to do with leaving the church, but it kind of does, doesn't it?
Because people can get disgruntled. People can get upset. People can get, you know, you get upset with enough people, and then you're looking for a reason to leave.
Then you're looking for anything that the pastor says that you don't like, but what did you say?
You know, it's just like, you know, and that's what can happen.
Then you start thinking everything the pastor does is wrong, or you don't agree with how he's doing this, or how he's doing that, or how he's organizing this, or how he's organizing that.
What he's saying to so-and-so, and, you know, you don't like his style, you don't like the way he preaches.
And then you just have this, you know, heart of stone that just doesn't want to receive anything anymore.
And at that point, then people want to leave, right?
So, number two, I wanted to address how to address grievances with the pastor.
There's a right way, and look, I'm just a man like everybody else. Well, there's some women in here, too.
But I'm just a man. I'm nothing special. I'm the pastor of the church. I'm leading this church. We are a pastor-led church.
And what I mean by that is that the pastor is in charge of the things that happen here.
All the programs, all the meetings, you know, the music, the soul winning.
Everything that's done here is done under my oversight.
And I am an under-shepherd of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the Bible is my boss.
And if I'm not doing something according to the Bible, then I need to correct that. That's my job.
And it's not always an easy job. There's a lot of things that are tough about it, but there's a lot of things that are really rewarding about it.
I love being a pastor most of the time.
But there's times and things that happen that I'm not such a fan of, you know, like confronting people.
Those are the parts that are hard. You know, telling someone they have to leave our church because they're being kicked out for something.
You know, telling someone no. I like to say yes. Yes sounds a lot easier. Yes is a lot better, isn't it?
But you can't always say yes. And let me tell you something, guys, you can't always say yes to your wife.
Every once in a while you've got to tell her no so she knows who the boss is.
I know that's not a popular teaching today, but it's just a fact.
So if you married Lucille Ball, then you're in trouble.
But anyway, so let's look at 1 Timothy 5 verse 1.
And if I haven't offended you yet, I'm going to get there, okay? I'll offend somebody. I'll offend you all tonight.
But I mean, I don't want to. I want to help us. I want to help our church. I want to help other churches.
And you know, maybe not everybody agrees with what I'm saying, but this is kind of what I found when I started thinking about these things.
I wanted to make sure that I preached the sermon about it.
So 1 Timothy 5, look at verse number 1.
How to address grievances to the pastor. What does it say right there at the very beginning? Rebuke not an elder.
So now, you can rebuke people, but you don't rebuke me.
You're like, well, who do you think you are? I don't think I'm anybody, really, but I'm just saying what the Bible says, okay?
Rebuke not an elder. It's not your job to come and scream and yell at me over something like that.
Or whatever grievance you have. It says, but entreat him as a father.
If you have a problem with me, or you have a disagreement with me, or you have something you disagree with, or you have a grievance with me that you want to say to me, that's fine.
I don't think I'm a hard person to talk to. I mean, do you think I'm going to rip your head off and throw it and use it for a bowling ball or something?
I mean, I look like I could do that, but it doesn't necessarily mean I'm like that, right?
I'm not going to scream and yell at people for coming and talking to me about something.
Now, I might not agree with you about everything you're saying, or I might have a different way to think about things, because sometimes people just kind of go off half-cocked.
And sometimes people get this idea that they could run the church better than me, or they could do a better job preaching, or whatever, and maybe you can.
But you're not the pastor. And it's not your job to tell me what I'm supposed to do.
It's the Bible's job. It's God's job. And obviously, I don't think I'm some prima donna up here that is untouchable.
I'm just saying, you're not supposed to rebuke me. You're supposed to entreat me as a father.
If you talk to your father, then you better just learn how to talk to him right.
Because if you talk to me like that, we're going to have an issue.
And it says, and the younger men as brethren.
So, obviously, when it's talking about an elder, you know, it can be talking about someone that's senior in age to somebody, but an elder in the faith is someone who meets the qualifications of a bishop.
They have proved themselves. They are the spiritual leader of that church.
And so you're not supposed to, you know, you're supposed to treat them in a way like you would treat your father.
Look at verse 17. It says, let the elders that rule well, see how they're the ruler, who rule well be counted worthy of double honor, especially they who labor in the word and doctrine.
So someone who preaches a lot of doctrine, and you know I preach a lot of doctrine. I preach a lot of Bible verses.
And so I'm laboring hard and so it says double honor.
Now, obviously, I think that this is alluding to pay, but you're like, oh, of course you do. You're just always after money.
Look at the next verse. For the scripture saith, thou should not muzzle the ox that treadeth out the corn, and the laborer is worthy of his reward.
What does that mean? You don't expect me to do a bunch of work, and then you're not going to take care of me?
I mean, that's just not right. You get paid for your job, but why wouldn't I get paid for mine?
You think my job's easy? I'm not complaining. I'm just saying that if he thinks my job's easy, let's do, you know, I think they have a television show.
It's called like, well, maybe it's just, I don't know what it's called, but anyway, I really don't.
But where you switch jobs, how about we do a thing where you switch jobs with me for one week?
And then I'm just going to make sure it's like the hell week. Hell week trying to make things work out for heaven.
Or just a really hard week going through a hard time. I mean, you don't know the phone calls that I have to deal with.
You don't know the counseling I have to deal with. You don't know all the different extra things that I'm trying to work on.
You don't know. But I'll tell you what, I'm working hard for our church, and I deserve some respect for that.
And again, if I'm doing something wrong, if I've wronged you, you know, I crack jokes and give people nicknames sometimes.
That's just how I am. If you're offended by that, then just tell me.
Just come up and say, hey pastor, I really wish you would stop calling me, you know, Drulio or whatever.
Sleepy head or, I don't know. I make up nicknames, you know, that's just how I am.
I don't mean anything by it, but if I offended you by saying something to you, or maybe I crack a joke about something,
and I do that sometimes, but if I offend you, then you can just take me to the side and say, hey pastor, could you please not say that to me anymore?
And I'll be like, sure. I don't want to offend people. That's not what I'm trying to do.
So, but look what it says about accusing pastors of things. Look what it says. Verse 19, against an elder, receive not an accusation.
So if someone walks up and goes, do you know that pastor smokes pot?
You should just tell that person, let's go over and talk to the pastor about it right now.
Why don't we go ask them together, and then, usually when someone wants to make a stupid accusation against a pastor in a church like ours,
someone's going to, you know, some alarm bells are going to go off in your head, or maybe you just don't know.
Maybe you're a new Christian, and this is another reason why I want to preach this sermon, because as a new Christian, sometimes people don't understand the policies of the church,
or the rules about how you do things, and you just don't know.
So this is a good sermon to help you understand that, but it says, against an elder, receive not an accusation, but before two or three witnesses.
Okay? Stealing our bank statements and publishing them to the whole internet with zero context, that is not two or three witnesses.
Okay? That is you taking something and running with it, and the people that receive those accusations without any context to it are wrong for receiving them.
Pastors that were getting those, you know what my pastor friends did? I'm not looking at that. Delete.
Because, you know, you better have your ducks in a row, first of all, and just saying something doesn't mean it's true.
You can make things out to be whatever you want them to, without actual receipts and things like that, but that's something that happened to me,
and the person that did that went and just got all these people, and then when they came out with their dumb video, you know, the videos about it,
one of the people emailed every single person in our church in Spokane the video before they put it out, didn't confront me, didn't say anything like that to me,
and then I just have to find out, you know, because people that do stuff like this, they like to wait for the worst possible time, like Christmas week,
or, you know, some busy time where they know you're traveling or something like that to do these types of things, but obviously there's all kinds of accusations.
As a pastor, I'm just used to it. I know I'm going to get accusations, but let me tell you something. What does the Bible say right here?
It says, against an elder, receive not an accusation. If someone just walks up to you and tells you something about me, and they don't have, you know, two or three people with them,
and they're not in front of me, because look, it says against an elder, receive not an accusation, but before two or three witnesses.
Are the two or three witnesses having a secret meeting and then coming to the pastor? No, they probably would just say,
well, hey, I need you to be in this meeting with me. I'm going to make an appointment with the pastor, and I have some things that I need to have a witness for.
You don't just, you know, run off and have some meeting where you invite the whole church and the pastor has no idea what's going on.
You can't do that kind of stuff. That's not how the church operates. So, to do that, if someone ever invites you to do something like that, you need to tell them,
no, I'm not doing that and I'm calling the pastor. Because, again, as the ruler of the church, as the pastor of the church, I should be involved in any kind of meeting that happens here.
And even if that meeting is a meeting about me, I should still know about it, don't you think? And it shouldn't be done in secret.
So, it says, then that sin rebuked before all that others also may fear. What is that talking about?
Well, someone that crosses this line and does it the opposite way or some other kind of way where they're just like revealing information, those people need to be rebuked.
And who's doing the rebuking here? The pastor. So, when someone, you know, tries to attack our church and, you know, when that was happening, you know, when I was being attacked and my ministry was being attacked and everything,
you know, I had to rebuke some people. And some people didn't like that. Well, how dare you call people's names?
Well, the Bible, you know, has multiple times where people's names are called in the Bible. We'll look at an example later, but Paul called people's names.
You know, Paul called Peter's name. He's like, I had to tell Peter what's up in front of people.
Now, so listen. Let's turn to 2 Corinthians chapter 13 verse 1. But the Bible's very clear here, isn't it? Like, how do you address a pastor? Well, you don't rebuke them, number one.
But you also, well actually, number one, yeah, don't rebuke them. Number two, you entreat them as a father. Number three, you know, you're not supposed to receive an accusation but before two or three witnesses.
It's not just Joe Blow with something he's trying to run with and then going around and telling everybody in the church this. That's wrong. That's wicked.
You can't be doing stuff like that. Look, the number one point was you don't do it to each other, so why would you do it to me? Why would you do it to a pastor?
It's just like you think that just because you feel like throwing the pastor in the trash that you can just do it however you want.
You better, if you're going to try to throw him in the trash, you better have your ducks in a row, have your witnesses, and if there is something that's disqualifying, then let's do the disqualification process. I'll talk about that at the end of the sermon.
But 2 Corinthians chapter 13, look at verse 1. It says, this is the third time I'm coming to you. This is the Apostle Paul preaching.
In the mouth of two or three witnesses shall every word be established.
So who's coming? Paul's coming. There's some grievances happening. Paul's already kind of been getting on to them about all these accusations he's hearing about in other places.
Brother Steve, can you turn that heater down just a little bit? So look what it says. So two or three witnesses should be established.
Now Paul was not a pastor, but Paul was an apostle. There's no more apostles. But still the Apostle Paul was in a leadership role.
He was planting churches. He was setting churches up. He was doing the work of an evangelist. He was training pastors. He was starting churches.
And he did have authority over these churches in a sense. And it says in verse 2, I told you before and foretell you as if I were present the second time and being absent now I write to them which heretofore have sinned and to all other that if I come again I will not spare.
So he's basically saying that all these false accusations are going to get dealt with and I'm going to come again and I'm not going to spare.
And basically Paul's getting tough with them here. People are always like, oh Paul was so nice. Paul could get down and dirty too.
And Paul, he's the one that wrote these things. He wrote this to Timothy about not rebuking elders. He wrote this to Timothy about not receiving accusations and things like that.
Because look, Satan will do anything he can to topple this church. Satan will do anything he can to shut preachers up that are preaching the truth. To shut them down.
And it's just a constant barrage of attacks against our church all the time. And so it's very important that we do things the right way because if we don't then we could lose it all.
And we don't want to lose it all, do we? We want to do things the right way. So even if a pastor is not your cup of tea, just say, you know, you're just like, well I just can't sit under him. I just don't agree with this. Or whatever.
And you decide to go to another church, that's fine. This isn't a cult. You don't have to be here. Nobody forced you to be here today. I didn't show up with a 9 mil and be like, you want a church sucka?
It's January 1st. Where are you supposed to be? I don't do that. There's no speaker set up in your house that says, come to church or you're excommunicado.
Well, that's not how we operate folks. You can come here if you want to. Nobody's forcing you to be here. I want you to be here. Obviously. And I want to be here too.
But, you know, if a pastor is not your cup of tea or maybe they've wronged you and you just can't get behind that pastor anymore, then you need to leave the right way.
If you're going to leave, leave the right way. So that's my point number 3. Leaving a church. Because that was kind of basically the premises of this whole sermon.
So, again, if you can't get behind the pastor, go somewhere else. But that doesn't mean that you need to lead a campaign against that pastor because you don't like them and try to do a bunch of things to get that church shut down.
So, people have left our church and they've left just fine. Even if they didn't say they were leaving, I didn't hear them chirping on the internet, I didn't see them making comments, I didn't see them making false accusations.
Now, are there people that have left our church that didn't tell me that they were leaving and then next thing I know I see them in the comment sections on YouTube talking all kinds of crap about me and whatever, just agreeing with the people that are bringing railing accusations against me and things like that.
It happens. But that's because, you know, a lot of times people will just leave church the wrong way and sometimes people leave church the wrong way and they're bad.
You know, and they might say stuff like, I just want to leave the church quietly. And that's the new gotcha for not smashing someone who's actually an enemy of yours. That's the new trick that they've learned.
Well, as long as I say I'm leaving, I just want to leave quietly. But then there's those that say they're leaving quietly and when they say this to me, here's what I say to them.
I say, that's fine, that's good, I'm okay with that. But just know that if I find out that you're doing stuff that you're saying you're not going to do, then I am going to come after you.
And I have. And I will. And I still will. You know, but obviously I don't need to call every single person's name that ever leaves our church.
Even if they leave bad, I might just mark them in a private sermon or something, but I don't have to get on the internet and pay for people to see it in Canada and England and all these other places or whatever.
What I'm saying is that people will say that they leave quietly, but a lot of times they don't really do that.
And let me just tell you something, I've left churches before. I've left a church just because I moved from one place to the next and a letter was written to my new pastor.
Because in the Bible, you know, old IFB churches do this a lot. They'll write a letter saying this person's in good standing, they're leaving the church on good terms.
And I don't really necessarily disagree with that, because I think that's good, because if a pastor clear across the country doesn't know that you're causing all this hate and discontent on the West Coast and all of a sudden you show up on the East Coast for new churches to torture,
you know, they're like, okay, I took care of the West Coast, now I'm going to the East.
So if a pastor writes a letter and you're recommending that person, and obviously it's a lot of show in modern times where it's just a showboat thing that people do.
Because most of the time, even if you don't have a letter, a pastor's still going to let you come to their church.
And I don't ask for people to give me letters or anything like that, because, you know, it's just not something that's really done a lot anymore outside of Baptist churches that I know of.
But anyway, so I've left multiple churches, and so when I left that church, went to another one, then I transferred my membership basically to a church of like faith.
I was pretty new at everything at that point, but I just asked my pastor, well, how do I do this?
But I've also left the church where I saw that they were doctrinally going off of a cliff.
And I had my family there, and when we're out soloing, a lot of people go, do you have a children's ministry?
You know, this is like what people seek instead of trying to get Bible truth and all this other stuff, where they'll just say like, do you have a children's ministry or a youth program or whatever.
That's not the most important thing, people.
But this church had a lot of people our age, and kids that were our kids' age.
And we liked that part of the church, but the pastor started paying for CCM music, because you can't just play CCM music with a little screen or whatever in the worship leader without paying for it.
It's copywritten or whatever.
So he started doing that, because we still sang hymns, but then he was kind of bringing this in.
And then he tries to tell me about this James White debate with some other, Gail Rippling or whatever.
He's like, he just smashed her and all this other stuff.
And so I kind of was like, yeah, I don't think he's King James only.
So it bothered me.
And I put up with it for a while, and I went to a men's retreat with a bunch of other Baptist men, it was just all men.
And when I came back, I was like, I got to quit this church, I can't keep going here.
And so I decided to quit, and when I got home, the first thing I did is I called the pastor, and I said, hey, I need to meet with you.
And then he was like, what's this about?
And then I was just like, well, I don't think we're going to be able to continue to come to the church anymore.
And he's like, well, come over and let's talk about it.
So we did. Talked to him at his office, and he actually F-bombed me.
When I quit the church.
And then he apologized afterwards, but at that point, and I didn't really care, you know, I didn't care that he did that.
I just thought it was just like, well, it just kind of helps me make my decision even more clear.
So, but here's the thing.
You're responsible for how you leave.
You're not responsible for how the pastor responds.
You do things the right way, and you won't have, you have a clear conscience.
You walk away, and you're good.
Whatever, however they want to act, and they're mad because how dare you leave my church or whatever.
And it's just like, that's just the way it is.
So, it's fine.
You know, and I wouldn't expect that, you shouldn't expect that I'm going to F-bomb you if you try to leave our church, okay?
If you just say, well, hey, you know, I'm deciding to move someplace else, and whatever, whatever.
Or if, even if it is a grievance, it's something that you just can't keep coming here for.
Well, then do it the right way.
Call me.
Text me.
Say, hey, let's meet. Let's talk.
And I'd be happy to do that, you know?
I would rather have you leave and know the truth about it than to, you know, speculate as to why it was and then find out later you're talking crap, you know, or hanging out with the trolls or whatever.
I'd rather have it that way.
And even if I'm upset about it, well, maybe that will help me to be better as a pastor next time.
Maybe there's some blind spot that I can't see that I need help with.
Because, let me tell you something, this is not a perfect church, it never will be.
And I'm not a perfect pastor, and I never will be.
If you're looking for a perfect pastor Baptist church, you've come to the wrong church.
Because no pastor is good at everything.
No pastor is perfect in everything.
No church member is perfect in everything.
And so if you're expecting to show up to a perfect church, it's just not going to happen.
But let me tell you how you can do things. Do things the right way.
Do things the way God wants you to, and God's going to be pleased with how you do it.
Even if it is like a split. Split happens.
You know, Paul and Barnabas split.
But were they both Christians? Yeah, they were both saved. Yeah.
So just quit in the right way.
Right? So, and, you know, I've had people leave this church that said,
I'm leaving quietly. And guess what? Later on, I left them alone.
And then later on I found out they're saying things and trying to turn people away from our church,
turn people away from, you know, the new IFB or whatever,
and they're trying to start problems. Well, then they're marked.
Okay? And I do that normally in private. Okay?
If I need to rebuke it in front of the whole public, then I will.
But generally that's not what I do.
So, and not everybody that leaves my church do I mark.
You guys know that's true.
But, you know, when a person says, I just want to leave quietly,
but the way they left was through a text message in our WhatsApp group
five minutes before we're about to have a soul wanting marathon,
I kind of wonder, was that done on purpose?
You know, I pull up to the soul wanting spot and all the ladies in our church are crying.
Do you think that's the right way to leave a church?
It's not the right way to leave a church.
That's the cowardly, you know, yellow-backed, you know, it's just, it's not the right way.
And then to have somebody else do it a couple days later or a week later or whenever it was the same way.
Did they come to the pastor? Did they come and tell me their grievances?
No. They just quit.
So, they quit without doing it the right way and that's, you know, it's wrong, you know.
So, what leaving quietly is not.
It's not just never showing up again and leaving all your responsibility behind.
You know, because a lot of people here have a lot of responsibility, you know,
we have people, men here that have responsibilities, ladies here that have responsibilities
and if you just say, you know what, I'm done with that church
and then you never call the pastor and tell him, you just shirk all your responsibilities
and never show back up again, you know, that's not right.
Do you do that at work? You'd be fired.
But you're like, oh, it's just a church, you know. Yeah.
The greatest institution on the face of this planet.
It's not rallying support to your side.
It's not calling every church member about your grievances.
It's not calling people from other churches to get them against your pastor.
It's not bringing up unsubstantiated claims by second, third, fourth hand witnesses.
It's not trying to get everybody to leave the church with you.
It's not making phone and email campaigns behind the pastor's back.
It's not spreading rumors among the brethren and causing division.
It's none of those things. That's not leaving quietly.
So if you're saying, I just want to leave quietly and you do any of those things or all of those things,
you're not leaving quietly. You're making a statement, aren't you?
You're making a statement that you've got a problem and you want everybody to know the problem.
And that's not right.
And so this is why I'm preaching this sermon because I want you to know what the right thing to do is.
Turn to Proverbs 6. Proverbs 6.
Proverbs 6. The Bible says in Proverbs 6 verse 16, it says,
These six things that the Lord hate, yea, seven are an abomination to him.
A proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood,
and heart that deviseth wicked imaginations, feet that be swift in running to mischief,
a false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren.
These are things that God hates. And when you're sowing discord among brethren, you're trying to get,
because like a three-fold cord is not quickly broken, right?
So when you're discord, when you're sowing discord, that means you're trying to pull that tightness apart.
You're trying to break that cord, aren't you?
Because we're supposed to love each other and be on each other's team,
but you're trying to sow discord so that these people don't like each other anymore.
It's not right, and it's actually an abomination.
So, what leaving quietly is? Turn to Galatians chapter 2.
What leaving quietly is? Addressing your grievances with your pastor,
or just telling them, hey, you know, I'm leaving. Not everything even has to be a grievance.
Maybe it's just you like this, you feel like you can serve better at a different church.
Again, not a cult. You can go wherever you want. No one's forcing you to be here.
But I do think you should tell your pastor. I think you should say, hey pastor,
I just want to let you know we're going to be moving on and this is when and where and whatever.
And face to face is probably a good way to do it. I mean, obviously you can break up by text,
but it's just kind of informal.
But Galatians chapter 2 says, and this is how Paul handled it.
It says, but when Peter was come to Antioch, I withstood him to the face, because he was to be blamed.
See how he withstood him to the face? He didn't write him a letter, you know, that he needed to respond to,
or whatever. He went to his face. And he said, we stood him to the face because he was to be blamed.
For before that certain Jews came from James, he did eat with the Gentiles,
but when they were come he withdrew and separated himself, fearing them which were of the circumcision.
And the other Jews dissembled likewise with him, insomuch that Barnabas also was carried away with their dissimilation.
But when I saw that they walked not uprightly according to the truth of the gospel,
I said unto Peter before them all, if thou being a Jew livest after the manner of Gentiles,
and not as do the Jews, why compelest thou the Gentiles to live as do the Jews?
So, he's basically saying he saw them, you know, we're all one in Christ Jesus,
and what he saw is the Jews hanging out in their own little clique.
And he didn't like that. It's dissimilation. Let love be without dissimilation.
You're not dividing and having cliques. And Paul said, hey, that's not right.
And you know, Paul was on the same level as Peter. They're both apostles.
So, it doesn't say he rebuked them, but he did withstand them to the face and he said it in front of everybody.
They that sin rebuked before all.
Obviously, you know, there's only one guy that's a pastor there, Peter.
Paul is an apostle, so they are still equal as far as their, you know, how they're serving as apostles with authority, right?
So, he did withstand them to the face, so it's good if you have a problem with somebody to go to their face, right?
So, that's what Paul did. That's what he taught too, didn't he?
So, again, how the pastor responds is not under your control, but how you do it is under yours.
And obviously, you're the one that has to live with your decisions.
Before we started Verity Baptist Vancouver, I was attending a church in town, and when we left, guess what I did?
I went to the pastor and told him, I'm leaving.
You know, why is that? I just don't understand why that's so hard to do.
When I've left any church, I go to the pastor, and I'm not yelling, I've never rebuked the pastor.
You know, I've never just like, you know, I'm leaving, and this is fine, how bad, eh.
I just like, this is just simply case in point why I'm leaving.
And even that last church, I just said, we're starting a church, and I'm going to be in the leadership of the church or whatever.
And I went to him and talked about everything on our last service.
Everybody knew that we were leaving, and it was all good.
So, but I didn't go and say, I don't agree with you on this, I don't agree with you on that.
Just leaving. Just starting a new church.
You know what, I'm still friends with that pastor today.
So, you know, I just don't see why it's so hard to do things the right way.
Because if you do things the right way, you know, and obviously if you've done something the wrong way, that's fine.
Learn from your mistakes. Learn. Don't do it the next time the wrong way.
So, and here's the thing. So, if you, if there's some kind of secret meeting where the whole church says,
you know what, we're going to have a secret meeting, pastor doesn't know, we're going to talk about all the things that he's doing wrong or whatever.
Don't go to that meeting. And let me tell you why.
Because if you do, my policy at this church is that you're automatically kicked out.
You're just, if I find out that that happens, whether it's two or three people, whether it's the whole building, I don't care.
My policy is you're kicked out. So don't do it.
And why is that? Well, in Luke 12-2 it says,
For there is nothing covered that shall not be revealed, neither hid, that shall be known,
that whatsoever ye have spoken in darkness shall be heard in the light,
that which ye have spoken in the ear, and closets shall be proclaimed upon the housetops.
Now obviously, contextually, this might not square up with what I'm talking about,
but my point is, Jesus is talking about doing things in secret, doing things in darkness.
What did the Pharisees do? They had, they took counsel in private meetings to have Jesus killed.
Okay, so we shouldn't be doing things in secret, having secret meetings,
and again, even in our bylaws it says that I'm the one that leads the meetings, I'm the one that leads the services.
If someone walks up and starts trying to interrupt the service and say,
Pastor, can I just read this? Get out! Don't come up here and try to push me aside and take over a church services.
I have people come up here and they lead songs and they do whatever,
and when I'm gone I have people that are in charge and come up and read stuff,
but you know what, it's not just a free-for-all that you can just come up and do whatever you want.
And it's also, we're not having meetings without the pastor knowing about it.
And you're like, well you just don't want people to tell the truth about you or something.
That's not the point. The point is, let's do things right.
I'm not saying you can't have grievances, I'm not saying that if I was disqualified for whatever reason,
that you don't have the right to have me removed in some way, shape, or form,
but I'll tell you what, it's not going to be some rebellious thing that happens to where you throw me out.
It's going to be decently and in order.
And I'll tell you what, if I'm disqualified, I'll be the first person to be like, okay, I'll step down.
But look, this is a pastor-led church. Everybody knew that, I think, pretty much when they first started coming here.
It's not a voting church. When's the last time we voted about anything?
Unless it was something, whatever we're going to have for dinner.
That has no spiritual significance. Maybe to some it does, but no.
You know what I'm saying? We have to do things right.
So I just want to make sure that our church knows how to do things right.
So, Ecclesiastes chapter, well, I'll skip that. I'm almost out of time.
So let's see.
So I already told you my policy on secret meetings.
My policy is that you're automatically excommunicated from the church.
Why? Because you're not following what the Bible says to do and how to address the grievances.
Which is basically what the whole sermon's been about.
How to address things properly, how to do things the right way.
So, and then obviously, if I'm abusing my power, if I'm disqualified for whatever reason,
then, you know, there's a way to do that. What do you do?
Well, you entreat me as a father, you come to me, and you have two or three witnesses,
if it's an accusation of something that would disqualify me as the pastor.
Okay? So anything that would disqualify me as the pastor,
that is something that you would have two or three witnesses and you come talk to me.
And then we would decide basically how to go from there.
So, but 1 Corinthians, go ahead and turn to 1 Corinthians chapter 14.
I'm almost done. 1 Corinthians chapter 14.
Here's the other thing that I would do.
I would call probably my most trusted pastor friends that have been in the ministry the longest
and I would say, here's the situation, here's what's happened, am I disqualified, in your opinion.
Because I'm going to go to my peers and, you know, obviously they're not going to just cover up for me
and say, well, you know, you can do whatever you want Pastor Thompson.
That's not what they would say.
They would say, you know, I mean, when Donny Romero screwed up, did Pastor Anderson cover up for him?
No, he told everybody, he made a video about it and just said this is what's happened, this is what we're doing,
you know, it wasn't done in secret.
So, you know, I'm going to trust my peers to tell me what's right and what's true.
When it concerns that. So if someone comes to me and I'm just not sure, I'm going to go to my peers.
And then, you know, there's a process that I've kind of, that I would do.
I would call Pastor Jimenez, and he already knows this because I've already talked to him about it,
and just said, hey, if anything ever happens, say I just die.
You know, we don't know when our time is going to come.
If I just drop dead tomorrow, how are you guys going to get a new pastor?
Well, what I want done is I want Pastor Jimenez to find a new pastor for this church.
Why would I have Pastor Jimenez do it? Well, he sent me out.
So I would ask him to help me, and he agreed to already do that.
So I would have Pastor Jimenez help me.
When I'm dead in heaven, I'm waving at you guys like, you should have treated me better.
No, I'm just kidding.
But I had you turn to 1 Corinthians 14.40.
It says, let all things be done decently and in order.
And really, that's the main thing I want to get through to you tonight,
is that if you have grievances, go through the proper channels.
Okay, whether it's a church, a fellow church member, or whether it's the pastor, or whoever it is.
I outlined it pretty well, I thought, so that you could all understand it with very little help.
So, and again, I'm not perfect. Nobody in here is perfect.
But, you know, we're all sinners in this room trying to just serve Christ to the best of our abilities.
And we're going to make mistakes. I'm going to make mistakes. Nobody's perfect, right?
But obviously, you know, major grievances are different, okay?
So the Bible says in Proverbs 27 verse 5, open rebuke is better than secret love.
Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.
And, you know, we need to be focusing as individuals what we can do to be better in our churches.
And if that's following Matthew 18 properly,
and if all of a sudden I have this big thing where everybody's starting to rebuke each other all the time,
maybe we need a little bit of that.
Again, I don't want us to fight.
And obviously you can pass over things. You don't have to just get mad about every single thing.
You can let things go.
But, you know, sometimes we have to tell people and be straight up with people about stuff.
And even if that person's straight up and they're wrong,
it doesn't mean that you have to agree with everything,
but that's why you go to the next step of the grievance process.
Like, I was in a union for a while. I understand the grievance process.
Okay? You have stewards that take your grievances and take them up and then you deal with management and whatever.
But grievances are basically issues that you have with other people.
And it's going to happen. It's going to be that way in church.
But we do have ways to handle them.
So, hopefully I've explained everything sufficiently for you.
And remember, if you have a problem and you need to come to me, you can come to me. I'm not going to be upset.
I might not agree with you, but I'm still going to allow you to do that because obviously I want you to do things the right way.
So if I'm a big baby about it and I cuss you out, then that's my problem.
But I'm not going to do that. Just saying.
I'm not going to be like that pastor that F-bombed me or whatever.
But I guess it just depends on what you said.
But anyway, I'm only teasing.
Alright, let's pray. Lord, we thank you so much for this church.
Lord, I pray that you'd help us to, when we have grievances, that we'd settle them the right way.
And Lord, that we would always try to do everything in this church decently and in order.
And I pray, Lord, that you would just watch over Shield of Faith Baptist Church tonight.
And I pray that you'd bless Pastor Jones and his wife and their family and Lord the families that remain there.
I pray that you would just bless them in a special way.
And I pray that, Lord, things can be, things can go better for their situation right now.
I pray that you would just bless our church and help us to do things the right way.
And Lord, when we see things going wrong, Lord, that we say something to that individual.
If we have a problem with somebody, Lord, that we take care of it the biblical way.
And we thank you, Lord, for making everything clear for us in the Bible.
In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.
Let's open up to page 402 in our blue hymn box and sing our last song.
Grace greater than our sin. Page 402.
Grace greater than our sin.
Page 402. Sing it out loud on the first.
Marvelous grace of our loving Lord.
Grace that exceeds our sin and our guilt.
Yonder on Calvary's mount outpoured.
There where the blood of the Lamb was spilled.
Grace, grace, God's grace.
Grace that will pardon and cleanse within.
Grace, grace, God's grace.
Grace that is greater than all our sin.
Sin and despair like the sea waves cold.
Threaten the soul with infinite loss.
Grace that is greater, yes, grace untold.
Points to the refuge, the mighty cross.
Grace, grace, God's grace.
Grace that will pardon and cleanse within.
Grace, grace, God's grace.
Grace that is greater than all our sin.
Dark is a stain that we cannot hide.
What can avail to wash it away?
Look, there is flowing a crimson tide.
Wider than snow you may be today.
Grace, grace, God's grace.
Grace that will pardon and cleanse within.
Grace, grace, God's grace.
Grace that is greater than all our sin.
On the last.
Marvelous, infinite, matchless grace.
Freely bestowed on all who believe.
You that are longing to see His face.
Will you this moment His grace receive?
Grace, grace, God's grace.
Grace that will pardon and cleanse within.
Grace, grace, God's grace.
Grace that is greater than all our sin.
Man, thank you for joining us today for our services. We'd like to see you back here next week.
.