Look back at verse number six where the Bible read,
But this I say, he which soweth sparingly shall reap also sparingly,
and he which soweth bountifully shall reap also bountifully.
Every man, according as he purposeth in his heart.
So let him give not grudgingly or of necessity for God loveth a cheerful giver.
And the title of the evening sermon is Be a lifelong giver.
Be a lifelong giver.
Now, in chapter number nine, we're really kind of focused
and dialed in on a kind of a financial perspective of giving.
And I think when we think of giving, that's usually what people think of.
They think about money or they think about giving some kind of financial means.
And that's obviously the context that we have here in this chapter.
But the sermon is not really about that.
I just want to at least explain this and then explain
just the importance of being a giver.
And what I really like from this particular verse
is the fact that God enjoys a cheerful giver.
What's a cheerful giver?
It's someone that wants to give.
It's somebody that is not doing it because they feel like they have to.
It's not like they feel like they just, oh, I guess I have to just give somebody.
No, they actually want to give something unto somebody.
They're not even just doing it out of obedience, not of necessity.
They actually want to help people.
That's the attitude that God truly loves, that cheerfulness.
Well, let's explain the context here a little bit better.
It says in verse eight,
And God is able to make all grace abound toward you,
that ye always having all sufficiency in all things,
may abound to every good work as it is written.
He hath dispersed abroad, he hath given to the poor,
his righteousness remaineth forever.
So we have a quote here of the Bible.
It says, as it is written, let's keep our finger here and go backwards
to Psalms chapter number one hundred and twelve, Psalms one hundred and twelve.
He brings up a portion of scripture that's quoted from the Psalms, Psalm one hundred
and twelve.
And what's quoted here is he hath dispersed abroad.
He hath given to the poor.
So who is the he there?
Well, if we look up in Psalms one twelve, we see it's the person
that's described in Psalms chapter one twelve.
But he's just talking about a person in general that likes to give.
OK, and it says in verse number one, praise ye the Lord.
Blessed is the man that fear the Lord, that delighteth greatly in his commandments.
So the Bible starting out here and telling us the guy that's blessed
is the one that's going to keep his commandments.
But then specifically, it's going to give us some insight as to what that means.
It says in verse two, his seed shall be mighty upon earth.
The generation of the upright shall be blessed.
Wealth and riches shall be in his house and his righteousness endureth forever
unto the upright. There ariseth light and darkness.
He is gracious and full of compassion and righteous.
A good man show a favor and lendeth.
He will guide his affairs with discretion.
Surely shall not be moved forever.
The righteous shall be an everlasting remembrance.
He shall not be afraid of evil tidings.
His heart is fixed, trusting in the Lord.
His heart is established.
He should not be afraid until he sees desire upon his enemies.
He hath dispersed.
He hath given to the poor.
His righteousness endureth forever.
His horn shall be exalted with honor.
The wicked shall see it and be greed.
He shall gnash with his teeth and melt away the desire.
The wicked shall perish.
So in this psalm, we have a notice of a man that's blessed
and it's because he's fearing God's commandments.
But specifically, it says that he's one who likes to lend, isn't it?
It says in verse number five, a good man show a favor and lendeth.
So it's showing favor unto somebody to lend somebody something.
And the Bible talks about in the commandments that you can lend somebody.
You would never want to take usury upon that of lending.
You would either want to take a pledge or you could simply just give it to them.
But it would not be to make some kind of gain off the person.
It's just to be a blessing unto them.
It's to show favor unto them.
And, you know, the mortgage companies want to talk about how much they bless
people with their loans, but it's not really a blessing.
It's actually a big cursing.
And if you look at how much money you pay back to the mortgage companies,
like three times the amount.
I wonder who's getting blessed here.
Is it is it really the mortgage companies is blessing people here?
Or is I'm sorry, or is it the people that are being so much blessed
as the mortgage company?
It seems like the mortgage companies are doing pretty good.
Seems like they're a business, not just a oh, we're just so kind
and so merciful and so full of compassion and we're we're so righteous.
No, that's not lending upon usury.
It also even says in verse number nine, where we get that quote,
he hath dispersed, he hath given to the poor,
his righteousness endureth forever, his horn shall be exalted with honor.
So who is the he there?
It's that righteous man.
It's that man that is blessed of God.
It's someone who is liberal.
He is willing to give unto people.
Now, obviously, the Bible says that the righteous consider it
the cause of the poor.
I'm not saying go give 100 bucks to the bum on the corner,
because that's not following God's commandments.
The Bible said somebody is not going to work.
Neither should he eat.
So we're not just going to sit here and be an ATM.
I'm not just going to be an ATM, just hand people money for certain reasons.
But obviously, we should consider the poor.
We should love the poor.
We should extend favor unto them.
In some cases, lending in other cases, giving.
OK, now go back to our chapter.
I want to focus more on the giving aspect, not the lending aspect,
which lending is still a blessing unto people.
Someone needs something.
You just let them borrow it.
You let them have that.
Even if you're going to take that back in return, that's still favor
and blessing unto them.
But in this context, it's more of someone just giving something.
And notice the context was a cheerful giver.
It's not one just saying, yeah, yeah, you can you can have.
Yeah, I mean, I guess.
No, it's like here have it.
You want another?
Oh, you want my coat?
How about my cloak also?
You know, it's just saying, hey, can you walk with me a mile?
How about twain?
It's going above and beyond.
It's wanting to help people.
It's wanting to do good unto other people.
Look at verse 10.
Now he that minister a seed to the sower, both minister bread for your food
and multiply your seed sown and increase the fruits of your righteousness,
being enriched in everything's all bountifulness,
which cause it through us thanksgiving to God.
So they're receiving blessing from God.
When you lend unto the poor, you're actually lending unto God.
And he's going to continually bless you and he's going to multiply your seed
and he's going to bring blessings unto you because of that.
And it's, hey, we're getting Thanksgiving unto God
because he's the one that's only taking tours.
It says in verse 12 for the administration of the service, not only supply
at the want of the saints, but is abundant also by many thanksgivings unto God.
So you're saying not only is God willing to supply your want,
he's willing to supply above that, go beyond that, go abundant
where you're just abounding with blessings, abounding with things
that you not only just want not need, but even the things that you just want, OK?
It says in verse 13, while the experiment of this ministration,
they glorify God for your professed objection under the gospel of Christ
and for your notice this liberal distribution unto them and unto all men.
Now, look, the word liberal, we have a negative connotation with.
I get it. OK, liberals is considered, you know, people that love filth
and debauchery, but liberal in the Bible is one who is generous.
It's one who's willing to just give of his substance.
It says in verse 14 and by their prayer for you, which long after you
for the exceeding grace of God in you, thanks be unto God for his unspeakable gift.
Now, again, I just want to kind of go through a few of these verses
so we get a little bit better understanding.
But basically, the apostle Paul is trying to boil it down.
He's saying, hey, if you are are generous, if you help people,
if you bless people, God's going to take notice
and God is going to bless you for your giving.
God wants to continually bless those who are liberal, who give,
who are a cheerful giver. God love it, the cheerful giver.
So you have the right heart and the right attitude.
You should not be afraid to want to bless people and to help people
and do good unto people.
This does not mean we still shouldn't use discretion
and use wisdom on whom to give that money to, on whom to bless.
I'm not going to bless, you know, I get advertisements
to support Pete Buttigieg for his political campaign.
I'm not going to give money to that guy.
That guy's a faggot and a guy advocates, you know, sodomy
and all kinds of weird filth for America.
I'm not going to bless that guy with any kind of money.
I'm not going to bless the derelict homeless person on the street corner.
You know, I'm going to use discretion in deciding whom I should bless.
But at the end of the day, I should be willing to be liberal
and generous with the things that I have.
And notice that he brings up something God did for us.
Oh, yeah, his unspeakable gift.
And I just always love that phrase.
It always just stuck with me.
The fact that we can't even express how great God's gift is.
I mean, it's unspeakable.
The gift of his son, the Lord Jesus Christ and what he's done unto us.
And so the title of the sermon, again, is being a lifelong giver.
Obviously, we can give of our financial means,
but that's not really the main thing I want to focus on this evening.
I want to focus on other stuff.
But go to Matthew Chapter seven, go to Matthew Chapter seven.
One thing we have to understand about God is he is a giver.
God is a giver constantly throughout the Bible.
God is one who is blessing other people.
He's liberal in his distribution.
He reigns on the just and on the unjust.
God is the one who gives us good things.
Says in Matthew Chapter seven, look at verse seven.
Ask and it shall be given you seek and you shall find knock
and it should be open to you for everyone that asketh receiveth
and he that seeketh findeth in him that knocketh it shall be open.
For what man is there of you?
Whom have his son asked bread?
Will he give him a stone or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent?
If even being evil know how to give good gifts on your children?
How much more shall your father, which is in heaven,
give good things to them that ask him?
It's saying, hey, if you know how to give good gifts, how much more does God
know how to give a good gift?
And he's saying, hey, you know how you get those good gifts?
You ask him for it.
You ask God for gifts.
Why? Because God's a giver.
God wants to give things unto people.
Go to James chapter number one. Go to James chapter number one.
In fact, the Bible takes this to such an extreme
that it says the only good gifts actually come from God.
The only good things come from God.
I want something good.
Well, I know where to get it. It's God.
That's the only department store.
He's got he's got all the
the monopoly on good things.
It says in James Chapter one, look at verse 17.
Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above
and cometh down from the father of lights with whom is no variableness,
neither shadow attorney.
The Bible says every good gift is from God, all of them.
You say what? What good gift do I get from somebody else?
None. There is no gift to get from anybody but God.
Notice God is the giver here.
God is the one that's blessing us.
He gave us life.
He gave us this earth to enjoy.
He gave us ribeye and sirloin
and filet mignon and rip.
Every good gift is from God.
Every creature of God is good and nothing to be refused
if we receive with thanksgiving.
So the Bible says, hey, that's a great gift.
You know what? I'm not going to reject his gifts.
OK, I like them.
Go to Matthew Chapter 20.
Go back to Matthew.
How about John three sixteen?
For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son.
Notice God is constantly giving throughout the Bible.
He is one who wants to give and wants to bless the gift of God,
which is eternal life.
For by grace are you saved through faith and that not of yourselves.
It is the gift of God.
I mean, I can't even the word gift is in the Bible so many times
we couldn't even get to like a quarter of them.
And just a full just we just reading verse after verse after verse
after God just constantly blessing and giving and helping people
and doing these things.
That's one of the attributes of God.
And if we want to be like God, we need to be a lifelong giver.
Just like he is.
Look at Matthew Chapter number 20, where I do turn.
Look at verse twenty seven.
Matthew Chapter 20.
Look at verse twenty seven, the Bible reads,
and whosoever will be chief among you, let him be your servant,
even as the son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister
and to give his life a ransom for men.
So notice the Lord Jesus Christ not only gives you life,
not only gives you breath, he even gave his own self
on the cross for all of our sins.
Why? Because God sets the example for a giver.
You say, what's a better giver than God?
There is none. Every perfect gift is from God.
Even us being evil.
We can kind of rationalize and figure out how to give good gifts.
But he's so much better at giving gifts than we ever could be.
He buys and pays for them.
He wraps them up on a special bow and just says, hey, it's here for the taking.
eternal life.
All we have to do is just reach out and grab it.
Just take a bite out of that apple.
All right.
Not the one that was on the knowledge of good and treatment
for the tree of good and evil. All right.
Go to First Peter, Chapter four.
First Peter chapter four.
So we've established, you know, the fact that God's a giver.
And I could again belabor the point.
There's so many verses.
But I want to make it practical.
We're supposed to be givers as well.
We're supposed to be ones who resemble the same attributes of God.
We need to be cheerful givers like God is.
And it says in First Peter, Chapter four, look at verse eight.
And above all, things have fervent charity among yourselves,
for charity shall cover the multitude of sins.
Use hospitality one to another without grudging,
as every man has received the gift, even so minister
the same one to another as good stewards of the manifold grace of God.
So we are supposed to do the same thing that God did in us.
He bestowed great gifts unto us.
So we need to be the same way and have a good steward attitude
and say, you know what?
I need to just give gifts unto other people, too.
Now, how does God give us gifts?
Well, let's think about eternal life.
How did he give us that?
Was it because of some good thing we did because we deserved it?
Or did he love us when we were sinners?
That's a lot of grace.
And that's why we go out to the loss.
We preach the gospel.
We're not looking for them to come visit our church.
We're not looking to them to make some kind of donation.
We don't have to dip them in water.
All we have to do is just, you know, hey, can you have a few minutes?
I'd love to just give you a free gift here.
I'd love to just preach you the gospel and show you how God wants
to give you the free gift of eternal life.
We don't want a business card.
10 bucks. You know, you want this DVD?
You know, no, we're just giving gifts unto them.
We're trying to be a blessing unto them.
We're being gracious unto them.
They may not even like our church if they look this up, you know.
But that doesn't matter.
We just want to bless them.
We're going to be a giver unto them.
But this isn't just the gospel here.
This is in many ways.
It says the manifold grace of God.
Manifold means many various.
God does not just give us grace when it comes to salvation.
We have grace in our daily lives.
If you read the book of the Bible, you realize some people died for lying.
Yes, some people died for fornication.
Some people died, you know, for all kinds of trivial things
that most of us have probably committed one of those things on the list.
And how how am I still standing here?
My grace. God is constantly gracious for us.
Well, that's because I you know, I started serving God and I got that right.
Well, how about all the days of your life that you didn't get it right?
You don't think there's been days, weeks, years where you were in sin
and you weren't getting it right and God still wasn't punishing you
the way you deserved it?
That's called grace. That's called mercy.
That's what God is like.
And we ought to bestow the same graces unto our brethren.
We had a fervent charity among one another.
Being a giving type person, one who's just I'm constantly
giving this person grace. Now, what's grace again?
Unmerited favor.
I feel like I try to explain this to people and they just don't get it.
It's like, well, you don't know what they did.
Yeah, that's why it's called grace.
It's because they don't deserve it.
This person was rude to me.
Yeah, I was nice to them.
Then they were rude to me and I was nice to them.
I just keep giving them grace like God keeps giving me grace all the time.
Or, hey, every time someone does something to me
that I don't like, I just treat them poorly.
Well, guess how God's going to want to treat you?
I like I want God to be as gracious as humanly possible with me.
So you know what I try to do?
I try to be as gracious as I possibly can with people.
And look, obviously, things come to a certain point
where, you know, a review comes into play or you have to
you have to tell people that they're wrong.
You have to hold them, you know, accountable for their actions.
And I get that we need to do that.
We have to have a good balance here.
You know what? I'm going to start being gracious
and I'm going to be gracious again and I'm going to be gracious more.
And then eventually it's going to turn into a deal.
And I think unfortunately, sometimes people don't really know
what goes on in a daily life of a pastor.
So they just think every conflict is handled like screaming
and yelling and public rebuke, because that's all they ever see.
Right. I mean, you see a conflict that's like, oh, man, this guy got lambasted.
You know, this guy is thrown out of church.
It's like, OK, what about the ninety nine other thousand things
that happened that you never saw about and never heard about?
You know, those are resolved.
Grace, mercy, kindness.
Don't think that a public example is your example
of how to handle every conflict, because it's not.
That is a bad way to handle every single conflict.
The Bible says to be slow to anger.
So if you see a pastor being angry, you should just guess
that there was a lot of other things that happened before that place
that took place, OK?
If the person just immediately blowing up at people, then that's a bad attribute.
That person's not, you know, shouldn't be a minister.
But the reality is that we should try to be gracious first and kind first.
We should have fervent charity towards one another.
We should try as much as possible to be peaceful.
We should live peaceful among all men.
OK, go to the Luke Chapter six.
Go to Luke chapter number six.
We need to be ministers. What's a minister? It's a servant.
And we ought to love people and we ought to be a constant giver.
I'm constantly giving people grace.
I'm constantly giving people mercy.
And, you know, the more you get to know people, the more you realize
we all need a lot of grace and mercy, myself included.
I need a lot of grace and mercy from my wife because I'm not perfect.
I screw up.
I do bad things.
I need grace and mercy from from you guys.
Even I'm not perfect.
I screw up. I forget things.
I would sure hope we don't go to a church where every transgression
we're going to have a scoreboard and we're going to start marking
everybody up every time they screw up or they do something wrong.
That's a bad place to be in.
I'd rather we just are constantly giving grace and mercy
unto one another and forgetting those things
and just having a fervent charity among one another.
Look at Luke, chapter number six.
Look at verse number 30.
Luke, chapter number six, and look at verse number 30.
The Bible says, Give to every man that asketh of thee
and of him that taketh away thy goods, asked them not again.
And as you would that men should do to you, do you lie also to them likewise?
For if you love them, which love you, what think have you?
For sinners also love those that love them.
And if you do good to them, which do good to you, what think have you?
For sinners also do even the same.
Now, let's put this in practical approach.
Someone that I like asked for a favor and I helped them.
The Bible just says, Well, what think have you?
Why do you think that's special?
The Bible is saying, you know what's special?
When someone asks you to do something and you don't like them.
They're not nice to you.
They're not your friend.
And you still help them out anyways.
That's what the Bible is talking about.
It's not saying, oh, man, I just really love blessing this person
because he's so kind to me.
That's not what it's saying.
It's saying, why would you have think worthy?
Everybody does that.
Unbelievers do that.
The Roman Catholic Church does that.
The Mormons do that.
You know what's separating them from Christ
is Christ does good on the people that don't deserve it,
that you shouldn't be kind to, that you shouldn't be gracious to.
It says in verse thirty three.
And if you do good to them, which do good to you, what thank have you?
For sinners also do even the same verse thirty four.
And if you lend to them of whom you hope to receive, what thank have you?
For sinners also lend to sinners to receive as much again.
And Jews with interest, don't you?
Thirty five, but love your enemies and do good and lend,
hoping for nothing again, that's being a cheerful giver.
Now, let me let me explain something between a gift and lending, OK?
Lending is where you expect something in return.
Giving is where you don't expect anything in return.
So if you're not expecting anything in return, you know what that is?
It's called giving.
That's what it means to give something.
Have you ever heard of the gift of eternal life?
Oh, you have to come to church, though.
It's not a gift you have to give up, not a gift.
So why do we not understand that?
Apply that to our brethren.
Why can't just give this to this guy?
What am I going to get out of it?
It's called a gift.
If you're if you're if you're wondering what you're going to get out of it,
don't give it because you're not even a cheerful giver at that point.
You should just decide, you know what?
I just want to bless them with this and give it to them.
I just want to help them out and be a blessing unto them.
It says in verse number.
Let's just read the rest of that verse.
I think I stopped reading it.
It says, hoping for nothing again and your reward shall be great
and you shall be the children of the highest,
for he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil.
But you don't get it, Pastor Shelley.
If I give it to this person, they won't even say thank you.
I mean, are you reading the same book I am?
He said they're supposed to be kind to the unthankful.
I bet if I help this person, they won't even say thanks.
Well, great, because God's going to say thanks to you.
Oh, but this guy, you don't understand it.
He's not a nice person.
Well, it says the evil.
I mean, we're reading the same book here.
Why can only do good to people that are nice to me?
Sinners do that.
Everybody does that.
Why are you so special?
And in fact, if you don't do that, you're worse than the sinners.
You know, all these fake
Christians, they help people that are good unto them.
So if you don't even help the people that are good unto you,
you're worse than the fake Christians.
You're like worse than infidel.
But if a man provide not for his own, especially those for his own house,
he is worse than an infidel is what the Bible says.
He has denied the faith and is worse than an infidel.
The Bible is not doing the status quo of you do good.
I do good. You do well. I do well.
You bless me. I bless you.
It's saying you do bad to me. I bless you.
You're not my friend.
I'm friendly to you.
You do something wrong to me. I help you anyways.
That's what the Bible is telling us to do.
That's the fate of a giver.
OK, it's saying, you know what?
Even if they don't bless me, God will take care of me.
And that takes faith because you're not going to get rewarded tomorrow.
You're not going to be rewarded.
You may not even see in this lifetime.
But if you have faith that God is going to take care of you
and abound you with blessings, he says in verse thirty six,
be therefore merciful.
Notice this as your father also is merciful again.
When I read the Old Testament and I read the commandments of God,
I constantly think like, wow, God is really merciful with me.
I'm not thinking, oh, man, I'm so righteous.
Oh, I got it. Oh, man, I'm so good.
Yeah. Have you seen how great I follow the commandments?
I'm thinking like, man, why is it God just strike me dead yet?
You know, why haven't I died yet?
I mean, I've murdered before.
I've complained before.
I've done these things.
God sending serpents among them and destroying them.
Look, God is constantly merciful and gracious unto us.
Why can't we extend the same favor unto believers?
You would not believe me if I told you.
It's like virtually every person that goes to my church is just like,
I can't be this person's friend because they're not nice to me.
And I'm like, get over yourself.
Look, you say, is that one case?
It's every case.
It's like virtually every person in here doesn't like somebody wake up.
And I'm not going to point out who doesn't like who.
And you say, oh, it's our church.
Yeah, it's this church and it's the next church and it's the next.
Look, wherever you go, people don't like people.
It's called life.
But you know what? You're supposed to be a giver.
What if God only gave things unto people he liked?
We'd all be in trouble.
Oh, yes, friend Abraham.
Great. I'm in trouble.
He said you're only his friend if you follow his commandments.
Good luck.
I mean, there's the 12 disciples.
Look, Jesus is providing a meal for 5000.
They didn't want they didn't even care about the message.
They just wanted the food.
Oh, he still blessed them.
How about the 10 leopards?
Oh, he healed nine that never came back and said thanks, did they?
Why? Because God's a giver.
Jesus Christ is a giver.
Why can't we have the same attitude of, look, whatever you do,
just make them all gifts, stop lending.
What's lending look like?
Well, as nice as person, they weren't nice to me.
That's lending. What's a gift?
I'm just nice to this person.
And even if they're never nice to me again, who cares?
I'm going to do good under these people,
and I'm going to bless these people and be kind to these people.
Look at verse 38.
Let's back up.
Be verse 36 again, be therefore merciful, as your father also is merciful.
And you say, why do you think you should do that, Pastor Shelley?
Well, verse 37, judge not and you shall not be judged.
Condemn not and you shall not be condemned, forgive,
and you shall be forgiven, give, and it should be given unto you.
Good measure, pressed down and shaken together and running over.
So men give into your bosom for with the same measure
that you meet with all, it shall be measured to you again.
God says the way you treat your brethren is how I want to treat you.
Well, I can't be this person's friend, I can't be.
I'm just thinking like God's mad at you.
You better not send in.
You better not do anything wrong.
You better show up to church three times a week.
I understand this person's like.
It just it's silly.
It's silly when you think about what God does for us.
Go to Psalms 41.
So we've been talking about friends.
OK, let's talk more about friends because I like this point.
I try to be friends with everybody.
I don't see the point of not trying to be friends with people.
But you know what?
I get the fact that some people you're just not going to like.
There's plenty of people that I've met in my life that I think, yeah,
I don't really care for this person.
They're obnoxious or annoying or always talk about themselves.
They always talk about Freemasonry every single time around them.
Inside joke, Psalms 41, look at verse one.
Blessed is he that considered the poor.
The Lord will deliver him in time of trouble.
So this guy is considering the poor
and he's saying, hey, maybe I can help this person.
He's not just just indiscriminately giving funds, but he is considering them.
OK, says in verse nine.
Yea, my own familiar friend in whom I trusted,
which did eat of my bread, have lifted up his heel against me.
Now this is I'm not going to read the whole pair for this whole song.
But this is about Jesus Christ
and how Judas betrayed him, his own familiar friend.
And notice what it says, which did eat of my bread.
So notice Jesus Christ was giving this guy of his bread.
He's blessing this guy and he turned on him now.
Would the God nobody in this room would ever have a Judas friend?
But let me just tell you, if you make friends,
you will have people turn out to not be friendly back to you.
It's called life.
I've had many friends where it felt like
the whole relationship was a one way street of give.
But you know what?
I started thinking about it and I was like, I feel like sometimes
even though I'm not trying, I have relationships like that,
where it's the opposite, where there's somebody that's constantly
just giving unto me and I feel like I can't ever give back to them.
I mean, they're just constantly blessing me and doing good unto me.
And you know what?
I'm so glad that they're not evaluating our relationship
in a scale and being like, he's not worth it.
Pastor Shelley, I mean, all I do is give to this guy.
All I do is bless this guy.
And look, there's some great people out there that just constantly bless me.
And I'm never going to be able to pay them back.
I'm probably never going to be able to repay all the good
and the blessings they constantly do unto me.
And I'm so glad that they haven't realized that and said, well,
I'm not going to be their friend anymore
because you're never going to be able to pay me back.
It's called giving.
And if you do this, look,
some of your friends will never pay you back.
They might even turn out to talk bad about you.
Say mean things about you.
Not be nice to you.
Stop being your friend.
You know, friendships would God they'd be forever, but friendships come and go.
And you can't you can't put all your stock in a friend,
even though, oh, I gave him bread.
Well, here's here's where your two options are.
You never want to be burned.
You have one or two options.
OK, never make any friends.
Option chapter number one.
OK. Or you can just get over it.
Because I don't get burned when I'm not what I don't care.
Hey, I'm going to be good to this, but I gave this person something.
They burned me. Well, it was a gift.
All the time, effort, energy, money and everything you put in a friendship.
Just make them all gifts and then you never get burned
because he was a gift anyways.
And you say, well, this friend, you know, comes and goes, look,
there's been times where somebody and I were friends
and then we're like, don't like each other.
And then we're friends again in the future.
And then we don't like each other.
It just ebbs and flows.
You're some of your best friends were like your enemies at one point.
And sometimes your best friend, you move in with them
and then you never want to hang out the person ever again.
Why? Because that's just called life.
OK, we have to realize everything should be used as a gift anyways,
because if it's just a gift,
then I no longer have to worry about what's going to happen.
Well, I don't know why I keep being friendly to this person.
No man that has friends must show himself friendly.
So if you don't want to have ever get burned, you could just have no friends.
And I see a lot of people making this mistake.
I see a lot of people.
They get burned, which is inevitable.
Every single person gets burned.
Every single Jesus got burned.
OK, real bad.
Everyone gets burned.
So here's the thing, you could just stop having friends,
and that's what people do.
They start getting jaded.
They start getting bitter.
They start saying, well, I just I don't want to go do these things.
I don't want to make friends anymore,
and I don't want to be kind anymore because it never works out.
They always just stab me in the back or they always just disappoint me
or they just they they don't ever repay me back.
Well, it sounds like you were lending.
Why don't you just start giving and then doesn't matter anymore,
and then you can just keep having friends because, you know,
we don't want to get this bad attitude of just I can never have any good
friends anymore because then you won't have any good friends.
The only way to have good friends
is just to accept the people that won't be your good friend.
I'm going to be friendly to people and they'll never be a friend back.
OK, who cares? Whatever. I don't care.
Look at it says in verse number 12 here.
As for me, thou upholdest me in mine integrity
and set us me before thy face forever.
Why don't you just have integrity in yourselves and just do that,
which is right in yourself?
Because a lot of times you can even overcome evil with good.
Maybe somebody doesn't like you,
but you just continue to be friendly to them and eventually they like you.
I've had people that I'm going to church with
and for whatever reason, they decide they don't like me.
But I just I keep and I didn't do anything.
But I just kept being nice to them and kind of them.
I didn't know they didn't like you, but, you know, I probably helped.
But I just kept being nice and eventually great friend.
You know, I remember there was a job I had.
And it was probably for a good reason,
but pretty much nobody in my department liked me.
Everybody did not like me, like strongly did not like me.
And it's mostly because I got thrown into this job
and they were behind on a project that they've been working for several years.
They've missed the deadline and there's all this pressure for them to work on it.
And they were like, can you help?
And I kind of was like looking at the project and I didn't really like.
I thought there was a lot of problems with it
and I was wanting to redo things and they're like, no, let's just finish it.
And since there was kind of that conflict,
my boss was just like, well, you don't work on it.
But they had to stay late and they had to work a lot extra.
So they just hated me.
And frankly, I could see why I could see, hey, this guy came in.
He's not helping out. He's not being a team player, whatever.
OK, so pretty much everybody hated me on my team.
You know, eventually we worked on new projects
and we started talking and we started working together.
And eventually they all started liking me again and we became friends again.
And I'm glad that they didn't.
You know, they were sinners, but they still were able to get over it.
They weren't even saved. They were not saved.
OK, really not saved.
But then we still were able to be friends anyways.
And I'm so grateful that, hey, they didn't just hate me forever.
Why can't you just be kind to the people and realize, hey,
friendships are going to come and go?
But if I just have someone who's constantly giving,
then I never have to worry about being burned.
Go to the Second Timothy, Chapter one, go to Second Timothy, Chapter one.
And you say, well, I've never been burned,
you know, by friends like I have when I came to Steadfast Baptist Church.
And some people get confused.
OK, let me let me unconfuse you for a second.
They think, well, it's just because of coming to that church
that I have people do this to me.
Let me explain to you why.
All the other churches you ever went to, you never made any close friendships.
So you never felt like you got burned.
But I guarantee you make close friendships outside of this church,
you'll get burned because that's the reality of making close friendships.
If you make a lot of close friends, eventually some of them won't pan out.
OK, but that's not going to stop me from wanting to have close friendships.
Don't look at, well, I'm just discouraged.
I can't make close friends anymore.
No, keep making close friends, but just keep giving to them.
Don't stop. Don't expect something in return.
Be a cheerful giver.
Just be a lifelong giver in your friendships.
Just make it a one way give train.
You know, a lot of my friends growing up, they would ever
they would only hang out with me if I invited them to my house.
And, you know, I'm the one that's writing dinner and food
and we're doing we're doing, you know, whatever they want. Right.
It's like, is this really a friendship? I don't know.
But at the end of the day, if you don't do that, you're not going to have friends.
A man that has friends must show himself friendly.
You become friends by one person deciding to just start giving into a relationship.
Eventually, the other person will say, Hey, I like this person.
I like being around them.
There's someone I can be friends with.
But sometimes they'll just burn you hard.
Look at second Timothy, Chapter one, verse 15.
This is the apostle Paul writing to Timothy, This thou knowest that all they
which are in Asia be turned away from me, of whom are fight jealous and homogeneous.
So the apostle Paul plants church after church after church in Asia.
And the whole church doesn't want anything to do with them.
Can you imagine that?
Planning a church, getting everybody saved, getting them all in the church,
just constantly blessing them, being good unto them, giving unto them.
And now they don't even want you to come around anymore.
I guess the impossible, I just give up now.
The first, you know, Ephesus just doesn't want anything to do with me.
What about Smyrna?
Yeah, neither of them.
What about Pergamos? No, Thyatira.
No, just all the all the churches in Asia.
They just turned away from me.
Well, you know what?
Just keep serving God because everybody turned away from Jesus to all of them.
All of them forsook him.
He just had to go to the cross by himself.
He just had to go up to Calvary and get nailed on the cross.
I don't remember any of the disciples going up there, getting crucified with them.
Even the apostle Paul says in my first answer,
no man stood with me, but all men forsook me.
You know, don't look at a friendship as what you're going to get out of it.
Look at a friendship as what are you going to put into it?
It'll change your life.
Stop, you know, and look,
let me tell you a really bad reason to come to church for friends.
You should come to church for God.
You should come to church to serve the Lord.
You know, that's a bad reason to go to work for friends.
You know, when I go on a job interview, I'm not like,
can I interview your workers here and see if we're going to be good friends first?
I just go to the job and if I make a friend, that's a bonus.
But that's not the reason I'm going to go to work.
And I don't go to church to make friends.
I never have, never will.
It's not the point of church.
I'm just going to go to the best.
If everybody in church hates me, I'm going
because I'm going for God.
I'm going for the Lord Jesus Christ.
Not to make sure everybody in here likes me.
In fact, if you preach what the Bible says, a lot of times people won't like you.
Like, I don't like that guy.
He always gets on my sin.
He probably watches me and he knows what I do and he he knows what I say.
Look, I have so many landmines in my mind.
I know so many problems that I can't preach anything.
If I'm afraid of offending somebody.
I always think of like, well, somebody somebody will think this is about them.
And I'm like, I don't, you know, and then I preach a sermon.
I think there's a couple of people that might get offended.
And if somebody else comes in, you preach that for me, didn't you?
And I'm like, no, I don't know, man.
Look, that's just life.
And if you serve God and all that will live godly in Christ, Jesus will suffer persecution.
Most of the time people hate you because they hate you.
All the poor people hate the rich people because they're not rich.
And all the rich people hate the poor people
because they think that the poor people think they're better than them.
And everybody wants to be at everybody's throats.
Just get over yourself.
Go to church for God.
Yeah, just be a giver.
Hey, I'm just going to church to give and to bless people
and to love people and to be kind to people.
And if everybody in here doesn't want to be my friend, we'll praise the Lord.
Though he slay me, yet why trust him?
And let me help you out.
I don't care what church you go to.
No one in that church, not every single person in that church is going to love you.
Especially if you go to a church that's not like ours
and you believe our doctrine, they'll hate you real quick.
OK, they will not want to be your friend real quick.
You don't have a TV.
What kind of freak are you? Get away from me.
You know, you go soul winning.
What? You know, you don't believe in the preacher of rapture.
I mean, you'll have people separate from you so quick.
Why do you why do you think it's better out there?
It's not better out there.
And you know what, if everybody in this room doesn't like me,
I'm still going to come preach on Wednesday and Sunday morning and Sunday evening.
And I'm just I'm just on borrowed time with you guys, but I'm just going to keep giving.
That's the point of being a path.
I'm not trying to be up here to be a pastor for what I can get out of it.
It's not worth it.
I'm doing it because I want to give.
And I know that God is faithful to bless those that give unto his people.
Go to Ephesians four, go to Ephesians chapter four.
And look, you know, the pastor has a lot of jobs, a lot of responsibilities.
But let me tell you, one of the jobs I do not have
is making sure that you're friends with so and so in the church.
And I, I constantly preach this and it seems like people just don't care.
You don't have to be friends with anybody.
If you don't want to be friends with someone, please don't.
Don't be their friend.
Just say, hey, I love you, brother. Stay over there.
If you don't want to go so into somebody, OK,
I don't look we're here to serve God and what God you should be.
You could be friends with everybody. You could go sewing.
I try to be friends with everybody.
I think that's the attitude you should have.
But if you just can't get over yourself, then don't.
And just be fine.
But I'm telling you, if you want to have friends, you have to
you have to take the
repercussions of getting burned every once in a while
being too much to the giver, be the giver in the relationship. Why not?
I would hate to get, you know, stand before God.
And he's like, you were just the taker in every relationship, weren't you?
I'd rather be like, man, you were just a giver in all your relationships,
weren't you? Look at Ephesians chapter four, verse 31.
Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and evil
speaking be put away from you with all malice
and be kind one to another, tender hearted, forgiving one another,
even as God, for Christ's sake, have forgiven you.
Look, bitterness is when someone does you wrong and you can't get over it.
The Bible says put that away from you.
Get away. Stop being bitter.
You don't know what they did.
You don't know what they said. You don't know what's happened to me.
OK, what happened to Jesus?
Did he get over it? Seems like he got over it.
Seems like he did pretty good going to the cross for all your sins there.
I don't think he's holding any bitterness up in heaven.
He's like, oh, this guy got saved.
He wants everybody to be saved.
OK, now go to the Colossians chapter three.
Why teach this, Pastor Shelley?
Well, I want you to have friends.
But the more important relationship you have in your life is your spouse.
And man, this just rings true in a marriage.
Be a lifelong giver in a marriage.
You should you should just be the you should just be the constant giver.
And look, obviously, in any marriage, only one, it's never going to be equal.
OK, someone's going to outgive the other.
But you know what you should be trying to do?
You should be out giving, not trying to outtake.
But in any marriage, at any point in time, it's going to have ebb and flow.
There's going to be points in time where the husband is just out,
giving the wife just completely.
And then it'll flip flop and the wife is out giving the husband.
And then it's going to go back and forth.
And you know what keeps that thing keep swaying by both spouses
trying to be a giver.
Hey, I feel like I'm out of balance, I'm just going to give to my spouse.
And this person is like, wow, I'm out of balance, I'm going to give.
And then you just keep going in the right direction.
Bad marriages, they just keep trying to take.
Well, you don't know what he's like.
It's lazy and he's not romantic and he never takes me out.
When's the last time you bought me flowers?
Why don't you just start out giving your spouse so much that he's just
he's like embarrassed about how much you're out giving him
and maybe you'll start giving a little bit more.
You don't know what she's like.
I mean, it's the same meal every night.
They make things other than Hungry Man.
You know, she's crying again.
I just got over it five minutes ago.
How are you crying?
She said she's crying about nothing again.
I asked her if she was angry at me.
She said, no, I thought she meant it.
Look, stop being so bitter.
Just be a giver.
Just be a giver in your relationship.
Look, there's no temptation taking you, but such is common to man.
It's always going to be a tug and war, but why can't you just
I'd love to stand before God and just say, well, you know what, God?
I just gave it my 100 percent in my marriage, no matter what.
There was days when she didn't deserve it, and I gave her 100 percent.
And I know that's not true.
I know I'm not like that. I know I'm not perfect.
But I would love to have that attitude.
I'd love to have that mindset.
I'd love to do that as much as I humanly possibly could.
And even if I think the scales are outweighed, well, great. Why not?
What if I pick somebody for my entire life, what was I picking them for?
To take or to give for better, for worse,
for richer, for poorer in sickness and in health.
Forsaking all others.
I mean, the marriage vow is not one of what I'm going to get out.
It's what I'm going to put in.
And if you want to have a great marriage, you need to be a constant giver,
not a constant taker, because eventually you'll run out of love.
You get love by putting into the relationship, not being bitter.
I had you turn to what, Colossians chapter three, right?
Because we've been focusing on bitterness.
Look at verse number 19.
Husbands love your wives and be not bitter against them.
What's that bitterness?
Them doing you wrong and you not getting over it.
Get over it. You're a dude.
Get over it. Stop harboring ill will to your wife.
Well, you don't know she just obeyed me.
She didn't do exactly what I wanted every time.
Her opinion disagreed with mine.
You know, get over yourself.
Don't don't keep being bitter.
Glover, you married her.
I didn't force you to marry her.
I promise you picked her.
So why don't you just get over your bad self and just love her anyways?
The grass is not greener, my friend.
I guarantee your spouse is the best person for you.
Everyone in this room just love them.
Just you're not going to.
Marriage is a constant, you know, battle and it's a constant fight.
That's why you have to constantly be giving them to it.
Try to outgive your spouse. Look at verse 23.
And whatsoever you do, do it heartily as to the Lord and not on the men.
Now, this should motivate you to give, because look, she doesn't deserve it.
Well, here's my question.
Does Christ deserve it?
Well, you don't know he doesn't deserve it.
Well, does Christ deserve it?
Do you do the things for your spouse because they deserve it
or for Christ deserves it?
Does Christ deserve a good meal?
Does Christ deserve for the house to be clean?
Does Christ deserve to be obeyed?
I mean, what did Jesus do for the church?
Did he ask for them to be perfect or you just lay down his life anyways?
He just loved them anyways.
Does he just have grace under them anyways?
I mean, when I read Revelation Chapter two and three,
we could totally get the mindset of like,
look at how much Jesus is just ripping in these churches.
You know, I mean, he's ripping them to shreds.
But notice how many problems they have and that he hasn't yet forsaken them.
I mean, think about that.
I mean, if we were fellowshipping with a church with a woman preacher.
OK, that in the woman preachers getting up, preaching fornication is OK
and to eat meat, sacrifice and idols, you would be looking at me
like I'm ecumenical.
This guy's so ecumenical.
OK, yeah, I'm a woman preacher.
You know what the Bible says, Pastor Shelley?
I bet Jesus knew what the Bible said.
He hadn't forsaken them yet.
You know, that tells me Jesus is pretty long suffering, he's pretty merciful.
He even gave her space to repent of her fornication.
Now, notice when she didn't, he brought down the hammer, OK?
He's not a softy, but he is one with a lot of grace, a lot of compassion,
a lot of mercy, a lot of love, and he gets over things.
He drops them like a bad habit.
Your sins are so separated from you as far as the east is from the west.
He remembers them no more.
He's not bringing them up constantly and slapping the face with them.
There's your marriage advice.
Don't be slapping your spouse in the face with all their past mistakes.
If they said sorry, get over it.
Don't keep bringing it up.
Just like Christ doesn't keep bringing up your problems.
Well, my husband doesn't deserve it, does Jesus?
Go to Ephesians Chapter five, go to Ephesians, go backwards.
Go to Ephesians Chapter five.
Look at verse 25.
The Bible says again, husbands love your wives, even as Christ
also loved the church and gave himself for it.
Notice that word again.
Give, give, give, give and your spouse be a lifelong giver.
Men are so selfish today.
It makes me sick.
It makes me sick when I hear about people, how they treat their spouse.
Men are just about pleasing themselves.
They're all about their own gratification.
They're all about them getting pleased.
And, you know, even in this movement, it's like these these guys want to cling
onto this verse about their wives being obedient to them.
And that's like their life verse or something.
It's like, why don't you make your life verse giving yourself to the church?
You know, like as Christ gave himself to the church.
Why don't you do that for your wife?
Why don't you make that your life, your wife, your life verse?
Sorry, your wife, life verse. All right.
Get over your bad self.
How disobedient are you to Christ?
Let that be how much grace you give your spouse.
You know, even on your children as well, you know.
Today, people just want to get things out of their kids,
they don't want to pour into their kids lives, they don't want to give
unto their kids, they just want to take.
Well, I just want to be just like me and I want him to be.
And, you know, I want to be a professional basketball player.
And, you know, I want to do all these. What do you what do your kid want?
I want you to give up your time to your kid.
Well, my kid just wants all this money.
You know, he doesn't.
The kid just wants you to hang out with them and love him
and to talk to them and open up a book and read it to them
and explain them how to spell out words, which is really takes a lot of patience.
You just to say the same words
and the same things and just it takes so much love and so much giving.
Look at it as giving.
You know, the Bible says we love him.
We love him because he first loved us.
You know why your kids are going to love you?
Because you love them for 18 years.
You know why they're not going to love you?
Because he didn't love them, because he didn't give them.
You know who gave unto them?
The public pool system.
You know, gave unto them their teachers and their coaches.
The friends.
The government.
That's who they're going to turn around and love.
That's why I want to put as much into my kids as possible
so that they can love me.
Love is oftentimes a reciprocal feeling.
You know, as the men, we got to lead and provide and guide for our house.
We got to set the example of one being merciful and gracious,
not just being a dictator all the time.
And look, yeah, I'm all for guys leaving their home.
I'm all for guys saying, look, this is where we're going.
This is what we're doing.
But you can be kind about it.
You can be gracious about it.
You can love your spouse. You can be a giver.
You know, whenever I'm asking my wife to do something, I know she doesn't want to.
Oftentimes I'll try to reciprocate by saying, well, I'll do this, but I don't.
Any shopping, I hate all shopping, OK?
Any time I go shopping, it has to be a gift because I hate it so much.
And I'm not even the best.
I feel on this one, the cheerful giver part, OK?
I'll sometimes go shopping, but I'm not cheerful about it.
I'm just kicking rocks while I'm going down the way.
You know, I hate shopping so much.
I have to pray for me. All right.
Go to First Corinthians Chapter 16.
Not only are you spending money, but it's on crap.
I mean, it's just like the worst of both worlds.
How about you know, when you look at church,
when you think of a church, do you think about what you're going to get out of it
or do you think what you can put into it?
I like that church because I don't feel like I'm getting a lot out of it.
What are you giving to it?
You know, the pastor and the deacon, evangelist and the ushers,
a lot of times they're going to give a lot more than they get out of church.
You know, there's a lot of people, they clean the church.
They're not going to get anything out of it a lot of times.
They're giving, giving of their time, of their effort, of their energy,
of their emotions, of their spirit, of their soul, of their friendship,
of their kindness.
Why don't you just give to the church
instead of worrying about how much you're going to take from it?
Because at the end of the day, you can't take it with you in this life.
So I'd rather give as much as possible and take in heaven
rather than try and take as much as I can here,
because I can't take any of this stuff here with me.
I just want to be as much of a giver as I possibly can.
The Bible says in First Corinthians Chapter 16, look at verse 14.
Let all your things be done with notice this word charity.
Verse 15, I beseech you, brethren, you know, the house of Stephanus,
that is the first fruits of Achaia,
and that they have addicted themselves to the ministry of the saints.
Wouldn't that be great if everybody in this room
just addicted themselves to the ministry of the saints?
What's ministering?
Serving others, loving others, doing good and others.
Not only do they do it, they're addicted to it.
They like doing it.
Hey, how can I help another person?
And where's another person I can help out?
And where's another person I can ask over that won't be thankful?
And where's another person I can be kind to that won't call me back?
And where's another person that I can do good unto?
And they'll just leave the church and say, I'm in a cult.
You know, like that's never happened.
I'm just addicted to helping other people.
I'm just addicted to serving other people.
I'm just addicted to giving to other people.
That's a lifelong giver.
Be a lifelong giver.
Just get it in your head.
I just want to give as much as I possibly can in my life.
Where can I give?
Can I give to my friends?
Can I give to my spouse?
Can I give to my church?
Where can I just give? I just want to give stuff.
Not about taking.
I'm not about what it's in for me.
I just want to be a cheerful giver.
I just want to help others. I want to love others.
The apostle Paul made himself a servant and all.
Anybody, the five-year-old child in the room,
he makes himself a servant to him.
He's not like, ah, it's a kid.
It's annoying.
They're all annoying.
OK, my kids included.
OK, I get it.
But you know what?
The apostle Paul's willing to serve that little child.
Jesus Christ puts him on his lap, loves him,
suffers the little children, as the Bible says.
Go to 2 Corinthians chapter 12.
People are going to come and go.
I just want to keep helping people.
If someone comes for one service and all they ever get
is just one helpful sermon, great.
If all I can do is just give you one version of the door,
great.
If I love on somebody for a few months
and they just never see them again,
why would I not want to?
Why would I want, well, I wish that three months I just
had reserved some of the gifts that I gave them.
I wish I just kind of didn't preach that good of a sermon
when they were there.
They didn't deserve it.
Why would I just want to give the best that I can
every single time?
Why wouldn't I just give it my all?
You know, even marriage is not forever.
Sometimes people lose their spouse early in life.
I would sure not want to think, well,
I could have given them a lot more love.
I could have done a lot more for them.
That's going to make you feel worse.
I just want to think I gave them as much as I possibly could.
There's relationships in my life where
I think I could have given them a lot more than I did,
like my mom.
My mom was sick with cancer, and I didn't know this,
because I didn't know when she would pass.
Basically, the last six months of her life,
me and my siblings would trade nights
going and spending several hours with her while my dad would
go and work, because no one else was there to take care of her.
She was basically on hospice, in a sense,
even though she wasn't.
It was basically just kind of slowly fading away.
But I remember dreading it.
I remember not even liking it.
I remember going over there and just
detesting being over there and just wasting time.
When I could have been enjoying my mother,
I could have been playing more games with her.
I could have opened the Bible and talked to her
about the Bible and made sure she believes
everything that I believe.
I could have been more of a giver
instead of just going, what am I going to get out of it?
And I'm never going to get that time back.
And I kick myself for thinking, wow, I
could have done a lot better.
I could have done a lot more with that time that I had.
You're never going to look at your life
and say, man, I wish I hadn't given that much.
You're only going to look back and say,
I wish I'd given more.
I wish I had done more for my spouse.
I wish I'd done more in this friendship.
I wish I'd done more for my church.
I wish I'd done more for God.
And who cares how they treat you?
Look at 2 Corinthians chapter 12, look at verse 14,
because people aren't going to work out.
Jesus works out, all right?
2 Corinthians chapter 12, let me prove this.
Look at verse 14.
Behold, the third time I'm ready to come to you,
and I will not be burdensome to you.
For I seek not yours, but you.
For the children ought not to lay it for the parents,
but the parents for the children.
So the Apostle Paul's saying, in a spiritual sense,
it's not the parents that should be
taking from the relationship.
The parents should be giving unto the children.
The children should be the takers.
And he's saying, you guys are like my spiritual children
I'm not here to see what I can get out of you.
I'm seeing what I can give for you guys.
I shouldn't be, he wouldn't even take a paycheck.
He just wanted to have such a good example,
such a good testimony of just how much
he's just giving unto them.
And look, there's nothing wrong
with taking a paycheck per se.
But he's saying, he's taken to an extreme of saying,
I wouldn't even be burdensome unto you guys.
And look, there's people, they'll come
and they'll preach for me, and they won't let me pay
for their flight, for their hotel.
I'll give them a check for an honorarium
and they'll just rip it up.
Because they just won't let me help.
They just don't want to be burdensome anyway.
They just want to bless.
That's a giver.
Oh, but you know, I don't know,
Pastor Shell is gonna work out.
Well, nobody knows.
Who cares?
They just wanted to bless those people
and bless our church and bless,
look, why can't you have the right attitude
about what it looks like to be a giver?
And when the Apostle Paul does this,
you say, well, if I do that, Pastor Shelley, though,
if I was like that, I mean, people would appreciate me.
People would really like me if I was like that.
Well, let's see what happened with Pastor Paul, okay?
He's doing absolutely nothing to take from them.
Zero, okay?
Let's keep reading.
And I would very gladly spend and be spent for you,
though the more abundantly I love you,
the less I be loved.
He says, hey, the more I help you guys,
the more I do good unto you, the less I'm loved,
the less you appreciate me.
You know, it's funny, if I sold everything
on that back cabinet, I'd probably get more thank yous
out of it than when you give it away for free.
It's weird.
The more you love people, the more you do good unto people,
somehow, they just, the less they love you,
they just take you for granted, they just take you,
they take everything as just, oh, sure, whatever.
The more you love people, the more you do good unto people,
oftentimes, the less they wanna repay you,
the less good they do unto you.
It's sad, but it's reality.
So I'm not preaching a message of reaping rewards today
or tomorrow or in this life, because you're not.
If you're a lifelong giver,
let me give you the bad news first.
It's gonna suck.
You're gonna give to people, and it's not gonna work out.
And they're gonna burn you,
and they're not gonna be your friend,
oh, man, you know, the more I love, the less I be loved.
But the impossible, okay, I'm done then.
See you guys.
Peace.
Nope, I'd be spent on you guys.
I'll just keep, I'll give it all.
Jesus Christ died for people that are going to hell.
And the more Christ loves, I mean, when it comes to free
will, do more people accept Christ or not?
And God's never done anything but good to them.
Nothing but good.
God has only been long suffering and merciful and kind
and gracious and forbearing, and they still reject him.
They still didn't like him.
It's called life.
We go to two more places, Proverbs 13 and 20, and we'll close.
But I like this concept.
Another place that we can give is our kids.
The children ought not to lay up for the parents.
I love that.
We ought to just give ourselves completely to our kids.
And you know, the reason I'm standing here before you today
is honestly because of my children.
I remember before Clayton was born,
just thinking about the Bible and thinking about the word
of God and just realizing how ignorant I truly was.
I was like, yeah, I've grown in church
and I've read the Bible, but if someone asked me a question,
I'd probably have no idea.
I can't even quote a verse.
I don't really know it.
It's a facade.
And I thought about my problems.
I thought about the sins that I committed
and the issues that I had.
And I thought, you know what?
I'm just headed down the same path as everybody else.
If I go down my path, my kids will make the same mistakes
and have the same problems that I did.
And honestly, because of my child gonna be born,
I said, you know what?
I wanna be different.
I wanna do the best that I possibly can for my kids.
I wanna get it right as much as I possibly can
so that my kids don't have to suffer any more consequences
than they just have to because it's life.
I said, I wanna give them the most that I possibly can.
That's what caused me to even wanna start searching
the Bible and searching for the truth
and understanding the doctrine and realizing,
hey, I was saved, but I was wrong on a lot of doctrine.
I think I probably changed my view like 80 or 90%
when it came to doctrine.
I was not King James only.
I was pre-trib.
I did think Sodomites should be put to death,
but I thought they could be saved.
Forgive me.
I was like, just give them John 3.16 and a bullet.
That was my plan.
Which they were still supposed to preach to every creature,
so whatever.
I went to a church that practiced speaking in tongues.
I was screwed up on a lot of stuff.
But when you start searching the truth,
it just starts hitting you in the face real quick.
And you're just like, oh man, I'm wrong on that and that.
But I'm telling you, the motivating factor for me
to just finding out the right doctrine
or changing my view on everything was just my children,
just thinking about Clayton being born
and thinking about his life
and me wanting to be the best possible parent that I could,
because I've seen so many other people
just not care about their kids,
not do anything for their children,
not laying up for their children,
rather just taking and being selfish and being greedy
and just wanting more and just putting their kid
in the public school than getting a babysitter
and just never spending any time with their children,
not caring about their children.
Their children are a burden.
People want to use birth control
and limit the size of their family.
And I would always say to people,
well, for literally thousands of years,
nobody was using birth control virtually
because children are a blessing.
The majority opinion for the most of time
has always been children being a blessing.
You look in the 1900s,
the average size of families ate across the planet.
Why?
Because there was another person to go plow the field.
They weren't thinking about college.
They were thinking about get him out there on the plow,
get him out chopping some wood.
They were like, let's get as many warm bodies as we can,
which I'm not saying that's the right motivation,
but at least they were right on doctrine
that children were a blessing.
It's only in this warped, perverted society
that people decide to start limiting the size of the family.
Why?
Because they're selfish.
If you don't want to have kids, it's because you're selfish.
But we're supposed to be a lifelong giver.
Now look, we don't control how many kids we get.
God opens and closes the loom.
But at the end of the day,
as many kids as God will bless me with,
I don't want to turn off that spout.
I just want to keep having more people that I can give to,
and more people that I can bless,
and more people that I can pour my life into.
I want my life to matter.
Look at Proverbs chapter 13, and look at verse number 22.
A good man leaveth an inheritance to his children's children
and the wealth of the sinner is laid up for the just.
Bible says the good man,
he's not even just concerned about his kids,
he's concerned about his grandchildren.
And he's leaving an inheritance for both.
And look, this can be financially,
but more importantly, spiritually.
Think about Lois Eunice Timothy,
laying up such a great inheritance for her child,
one of unfeigned faith.
What's unfeigned?
Meaning she actually cared.
She wasn't at church for the friends.
She wasn't in church for all the bells and whistles.
We don't have any bells and whistles, so.
She wasn't in church for anything,
but because she just loved Jesus.
She just loved the Lord.
He was there for the Rhymotives.
Go to church for Jesus.
And then it's always worth it.
I don't go for people, I go for Jesus.
You say I'm offended, well, too bad.
I don't go for you guys, I go for Jesus.
If you don't show up, I'm still, I'm gonna show up.
If all of you quit, I'll preach to my family, whatever.
But at the end of the day, I'm not coming here for people,
I'm coming here for Jesus Christ.
And obviously, part of my job is to minister to the people,
don't hear me wrong, and I do care about you.
If you don't show up, I'm gonna be disappointed.
But at the end of the day, I'm still gonna keep doing it.
And I'm just gonna love the people that wanna be loved.
But the more I love, the less I be loved.
Go to chapter 20, we'll finish, chapter 20.
The Bible says in Romans chapter 12, verse one,
that we're supposed to be a living sacrifice.
You know what, that is giving.
It's not a living taking, not a living reward.
Oh, I just can't, I just can't see how,
I wanna give as much as I possibly can to this life.
In Proverbs chapter 20, verse seven,
the just man walketh in his integrity,
his children are blessed after him.
When you do that which is right,
when you're a lifelong giver,
your children are gonna be blessed by that.
They're gonna see your example,
they're gonna see what you've modeled for them.
And my challenge is to you,
not how much you can take in this life,
but how much can you give?
How much is Christ already given for you?
How much more than can we give of our own selves?
Give to your friends,
give to the brothers and sisters in Christ,
give to your spouse, give to your church,
give to your children.
It's your reasonable service.
Let's close in prayer.
Thank you, Father, so much for your word.
Thank you for all that you've given to us.
Thank you for the example that you said
of being a lifelong giver.
I pray that if there's any bitterness or envy or strife
in any of our hearts that we would just let that go,
that we just put that away from us,
and rather we'd just put on fervent charity,
that we just humble ourselves
and realize how much you've given unto us,
and that you just give us the right spirit,
a spirit of being cheerful giver,
one that's not looking for anything in return,
but rather just wants to bless other people.
And we know that you will continually bless us
as we bless them.
In Jesus' name we pray, amen.