Alright, let's go back to the Song of Solomon, please
Song of Solomon
I don't hear a lot of preaching on the Song of Solomon to be honest with you
But we are continuing our series on the family and I want you to look at Song of Solomon chapter 2
verse 11
Song of Solomon chapter 2 verse 11. Now before I read that just keep your finger there
Quite often when I've heard preaching from the Song of Solomon
It's often associated people are often associated with
Christ as the bridegroom and the church or the saints as though as as the bride
They often talk about this book representing Christ and his New Testament Church
Now first of all, I don't believe the bride and I've covered this before
I don't believe the bride is only the New Testament Church
I believe the bride of the Lamb as it says in the book of
Revelation is heavenly Jerusalem that descends from above onto the earth and that New Jerusalem is
made up of absolutely New Testament saints as well as every other saints that's ever existed
because it's built upon the 12 the names of the 12 Apostles the
Foundations are and the gates are the 12 gates at the named after the 12 tribes of Israel. So we see a
representation of Old Testament and New Testament saints in that bride of the land
It's clearly spelled out that in the book of Revelation
nevertheless, I'm sure you can take applications and principles from the Song of Solomon and apply that to
Ourselves as a church and to the Lord God, I'm sure we can do that
Okay, I'm sure about that. The Bible is a deep book has many layers and it can be applied in many
different doctrines in many aspects of life
Now I've seen that preach and that's fine, but I think quite often we miss the points of this book
All right, the Song of Solomon is actually as you read it first and foremost a love song
Okay, it's a love song between a husband and a wife
Okay, and it's got some of the most intimate, you know
Details of the relationship between a husband and a wife
So if I'm covering a series on the family and I did want to cover marriage in a little bit more detail this time
I can't help but preach from the Song of Solomon because God has given us this love song this
you know primarily focused on husbands and wives and
I've often like I said, I've often heard it preached about this is the cry, you know about Christ and New Testament Church
And so I never really went to this book seeking counsel on my marriage on family, etc
So I think we're missing this book. A lot of churches are missing
The great information that we can find in this book. So if we look at chapter 2 verse 11, I
Believe one of the key things you can find it here in Song of Solomon chapter 2 verse 11
It says for lo the winter is past
The rain is over and gone. So think about those words the winter is past
so
What is the season of this song if winter is past anyone can answer that what's the next season after winter?
Spring
Absolutely. It's spring. So the title of the sermon tonight is
springtime marriage
Springtime marriage and I believe this book is written for us that as husbands and wives we can experience
Springtime all the time. Okay springtime in our marriage. So I've got let me have a look
I've got a lot of points to cover tonight
13 points and I could have done more
All right
But I just want to grab some some pointers here that will help us have our marriages in the right season in springtime
Okay, not in winter. We don't want to you know a marriage that's cold and wet
No, we want a marriage that's vibrant and growing okay one that's productive one
That's fruitful one that we can enjoy each other's company
And so we're going to go through these 13 points of how we can have a springtime marriage
Now maybe some of these things you apply in your life and that's good keep doing it
But there might be other areas that you've not applied in your marriage life and you definitely need to start applying those things
Okay, so let's start off in chapter 1 Song of Solomon chapter 1 verse 2
Song of Solomon chapter 1 verse 2 and
And by the way, these 13 points they're not in any particular order
It's just kind of the order that I just put them together that made sense to me to preach on but point number one
It says here in Song of Solomon chapter 1 verse 2
The wife speaking here. Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth
For thy love is better than wine
Point number one in your marriage if you want it to be a springtime marriage is
Show some physical affection to your wife show some physical affection to your husband
Right, and I'll never forget. My mom, you know says this when I was when I was a child
I used to ask my dad dad my dad's here right but dad, you know kiss mom, you know dad kiss mom
You know, I like seeing my parents, you know
You know have some physical affection as a child
It gave me comfort as a child
It gave me security knowing that mom and dad love each other and there's no greater way to show love
And I believe you know your children should see this. I think your children should see husband and wife
Embracing husband and wife sitting together holding hands, you know kissing one another, you know
Because they're gonna see it in the world. They're gonna see you know
Unmarried couples kissing if they turn on the TV, that's that's always on show
Hey, they need to see a good godly example of what it means to have physical affection. There's nothing wrong with physical affection
it's good and proper in the marriage and
Notice that on the second part of verse 2 it says for thy love is better than wine
So what's the point of the physical affection the kissing the embracing it's because you're showing love one to another
And the Bible says it's better than wine
Okay, it's better than the best juice you can get the best, you know grape juice that you can rip
I mean, you know when we purchase those are those freshly squeezed grape juice. How nice was that?
How sweet it was it was delicious, right and yet marriage ought to be sweeter than that better than that
Okay, and it comes with the physical affection now these 13 points guys
I'm not gonna spend a lot of time on it
We're gonna skip through them pretty quickly
But point number one was you need to show physical affection
And I truly believe your kids need to see a bit of that as well. All right
Point number two look at verse 3 chapter 1 verse 3
Now this is for the men
It's you she says because of the savor of thy good ointments thy name is as ointment poor poured forth
Therefore do the virgins love thee and notice what does the wife say about her husband that is
Got the savor of good ointments. Well, that means he smells good
All right now say this to the husband's right because I think sometimes we can get a little sloppy around the house
You know, it's it's sort of like how manly can I be is almost like how smelly can I be?
Alright, you know do I put on that deodorant or that that perfume? No, you know what?
I'm just gonna be a smelly man. No look you see in the Bible here that she appreciates
That he doesn't try to stink up the house
All right
She appreciates that he presents himself and tries to me be a nice smelling savor to his wife and she really
Appreciates that so point number two and yes, I'm gonna have a bit of fun on this is to smell good
All right smell good, you know don't bask in how stinky you can be
Alright just how filthy you can be no be a husband that wants to present himself well to his wife
So his wife can enjoy his company and smell good
Point number three. Let's go to point number three
Let's go to verse number five song of Solomon verse chapter 1 verse 5
and notice these words
Actually before we read it before we read it
I'm talking to the husband's here
All right husbands and maybe if you know the husband you probably can you might know the answer to this anyway
But isn't it true that ladies are often preoccupied about their appearance?
You know how they look, you know, usually if a girl has curly hair
She wants to have straight hair or if she's got straight hair
She wants to have wavy hair or if she's light-skinned
She wants to have a bit of a tan or if she's dark-skinned. She wants to be wider
Isn't that true then they're sort of never satisfied with how they look and so when it comes to your wife
Who do you think's gonna be the most critical about her appearance?
Now, I hope it's not the husband
Okay, but it's it's it's gonna be the wife. Look at look at verse number five song of Solomon chapter 1 verse 5
Look what the wife says
She says I am black
but comely oh
Ye daughters of Jerusalem as the tents of Kedar as the curtains of Solomon
But look at look at how she feels about this in verse 6 look not upon me
Because I am black just don't look at me. I don't like the way I look cuz I'm black, right?
And why is she black? Is she just dark-skinned? No, it says here because the Sun have looked upon me
So why is she dark?
She's got in a tan, right? She's dark and we'll see why there it says
Because the Sun have looked upon me. My mother's children were angry with me. They made me the keeper of the vineyards
But mine own vineyard have I not kept so she goes look my siblings my family
They've made me go and work in the family vineyard and she says look they're angry at me now
I don't think they're really angry at her. Okay, but she's upset that she's been tanned and you know
There are some places in the world, you know, I'm thinking of like India for example where they try to make this skin wider
Okay, and so even like today though, I think today most ladies especially in Australia want that beach tan, right?
They go to the beach for whatever, you know and try to get that tan because they want to have a
Better color about themselves, but there are still some places in the world where they prefer the white skin
All right, and I think this is the culture we're in today, you know, she's upset that she's gotten this tan
She doesn't want anyone to look upon her and says look I've been working hard in the vineyards
But my known vineyard or my own appearance I have not kept
Okay, so you can see there that she's critical of her own appearance
But look at verse seven
It says here
Tell me oh thou who my soul lover
Where thou feedest where thou makest thy flock to rest at noon
For why should I be as one that turneth aside by the flocks of thy companions?
Now look at this if this is now the husband speaking if thou know not oh thou fairest among women
So, how does he respond she says look I don't look good I've got a tan I'm dark
What does he call her the fairest among women? Hey, you're the most beautiful woman I've ever laid eyes on
You're the prettiest girl I've ever seen. All right, so point number three is
Compliment your wife on her appearance. We see this in the book of Solomon, right?
Oh, they are fairest among women verse 8 go thy way forth by the footsteps of the flocks and feed thy kids
Beside the shepherd's tents. I have compared thee. Oh my love to a company of horses in Pharaoh's chariots
Okay, and we keep going on but we see now that he says look you're beautiful and for whatever reason
I don't think I'd compliment my wife by comparing us her to a to Pharaoh's horses or her Pharaoh's chariots
But I guess Pharaoh's chariots represents the wealth of Egypt
The power of Egypt or whatever and he says look you remind me of this
Okay, you see that he tries to change her thoughts about herself. He says look you're beautiful
Yeah, you might be a little dark
You might be a little tan
But you're the fairest amongst women and then he goes on and starts complimenting her the Song of Solomon style
We're not going to look at all of this, but it's quite interesting how how you know, he compliments his wife
We also see in other passage of the Song of Solomon is that the wife also compliments the appearance of a husband
But I won't go into that all that much as well
But I think both things apply okay that we ought as husbands to compliment our wives on their appearance
You know that they're often critical about themselves, but also if you read it, you'll see that the wives also
Compliment their husbands on their appearance, okay
Now you might say to me but hold on you know Kevin, you know, yes when I first met my wife
You know, she was the prettiest. Yes when I first laid my eyes on her, you know, I wanted to marry that woman
But you know, you know, we've been married now 10 years 20 years
You know, what about the you know, the imperfections that come with age, you know
What about the imperfections that come with bearing children or all these things?
Well, let's get Solomon's advice here go to chapter 4 Song of Solomon chapter 4
So we're gonna spend all our time in Song of Solomon in case you're wondering. Let's go to Song of Solomon chapter 4
Song of Solomon chapter 4 verse well
What are we gonna say now? What we're gonna say when we see those imperfections Song of Solomon chapter 4 verse 7
This is what he says
Thou art all fair my love
There is no spot in thee
All right, hey, this is the wisest man on the earth God's given Solomon great wisdom
Do you see him criticizing his wife's appearance? Does he do you see him criticizing her for imperfections?
No, he says honey. There's no spot in thee. You're perfect
You're the best that it's ever been and I think if Solomon can say that about his wife
Which was the wisest man, I think that is a wise approach that we as husbands can take with our wives
All right, so something to learn from learn from Solomon there is no spot there is no imperfection in your wife
Okay, she's the fairest amongst women go back to chapter 1 Song of Solomon chapter 1
Song of Solomon chapter 1 will continue in verse 10
So it was complimenting his wife's appearance and then we get to Song of Solomon chapter 1 verse 10
It says thy cheeks are comely
Or beautiful with rows of jewels thy neck with chains of gold
We will make thee borders of gold with studs of silver
So point number four guys, and I don't know if your wives like this or not
Point number four is buy her jewelry
Purchase her jewelry if you want to give her a nice gift on her birthday on your wedding anniversary
Or just as an ad hoc, you know surprise
Hey jewelry can work and we see with Solomon. He compliments her and
Mentions her jewelry the gold that's around or the chains of gold that's around her neck and somehow
She had some jewelry on her cheeks as well. And so I don't believe in and look
There are some Christians actually now we are gonna turn somewhere else. Keep your finger there go to first Timothy go to first Timothy
But if you if you take the Bible as a whole
You'll see that there's nothing wrong with jewelry
Okay, and there are some Christians that actually think it's sinful to put on jewelry
It's sinful to wear it and so they won't wear earrings. They won't wear necklaces then let me say look it's up to you
I'm not saying that it's necessary. I command of God to do this or not. It's not sinful
And it's just a thing that you can do. There's nothing right. There's nothing right or wrong
We're wearing jewelry or not wearing jewelry, but if you're familiar with the Old Testament
You'll often find godly men and even God himself
Describing Israel, you know dressing up Israel dressing up Judah
He describes, you know put as symbolically as putting jewelry and cleaning her up so on and so forth
So we see that there's nothing wrong with jewelry in of itself
But some people will turn to first Timothy chapter 2 first Timothy chapter 2 verse 9
First Timothy chapter 2 verse 9 and let's read this so we can we can understand what's going on here
It says in like manner also
That women are doing themselves in modest apparel with shame-facedness and sobriety
Not with broidered hair or gold or pearls or costly array
But which become of women professing godliness with good works
Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection
But I suffer not a woman to teach nor to assert authority over the man, but to be in silence
So let's let's understand this so
If you're familiar with the Amish in America or people that are like this
You'll often find that the women will take a passage like this and be like well
It must be sinful then to put on gold or pearls or have costly
Costly array there. All right, and so they'll dress as plain as they can
They won't put any jewelry on and they'll just look at you absolutely as plain as they possibly can
Because that's how they interpret this passage
Do you think the point of this passage is to not wear jewelry? Is that the point of that passage?
Because if it was the point of that passage, you're gonna have some major conflicts with the rest of the Bible
Okay, because there's absolutely not nothing wrong and you see it as you read through it nothing wrong with jewelry in of itself
But the point of this passage is talking about behavior in the church
Okay, character of godly men in the passages before and of godly women
So when we think about a godly woman, a woman that's in the church that's striving to serve the Lord
What is it about her that ought to stand out? What is it about her character that people should appreciate?
Let's look at it again there in verse number nine
It says in like manner also that women adorn
What does it mean to adorn? To put on. It's like clothing to put something on
Themselves in modest apparel. The first point there is to dress modestly
Meaning to dress in a way that does not draw attention to yourself
Okay dressed in a way that's appropriate and normal not showing your nakedness not showing the shape of your figure
You know by just being modest so you don't bring unnecessary attention to yourself
But look how else are you to adorn yourself with shamefacedness and sobriety
Hey, these are not pieces of clothing. These are
characteristics about the woman
okay, so what is it about the woman that should be a
Attractive or or what what should shine out about the woman actually look at verse number ten it says as well
But which become of women professing godliness with good works
Okay, so when we talk about a woman in the church you ought to be someone whose character has that shamefacedness
You know you're not a loud obnoxious woman
You're not a woman as we read later on that's that's trying to be a leader in the church and teaching the church
You're a woman that has good works that has good character
That's submissive to the authority of her husband and and remain silent in the churches. That's what a woman ought to
Represent and not be all about them the broided head you know the braided hair look the gold and the pearls
Because I'm sure you can relate to this, but I'm sure you've come across women who dress themselves up really nice
You know they they dole themselves up. You know they have the best hairstyles and the most fancy clothes and all the jewelry
But they're absolutely shallow. You know they might be absolutely rude. They might be obnoxious
You know yeah, they might look pretty on the outside, but on the inside
They're just a woman you would not want to marry
You know so that is not the kind of woman that you ought to be okay wives
But someone that has these characteristics, and it's not all about the bling-bling
It's not about all about the gold and all those accessories that come with it
So I wanted to show you that because there's nothing wrong if we if we use the song of Solomon as our example
There's nothing wrong with your wife having jewelry, and if you're what if your wife likes jewelry
Oh, yeah, absolutely buy them something nice
Buy them something they appreciate so that's point number four you know buy her jewelry give her good gifts
Let's go to point number five
Song of Solomon back to Song of Solomon chapter 1 verse 16 Song of Solomon chapter 1 verse 16
Song of Solomon chapter 1 verse 16
It
Says here behold thou art fair my beloved
Yea, pleasant also our bed is green
Now what do you think that means?
This is between a husband and a wife obviously they're talking about you know that they appreciate each other
They appreciate the appearance of each other and then they talk about their marriage bed
It says their bed is green now if we take the theme of
This being about a springtime marriage
You know when it's spring
It's the most green that you're going to get right because the leaf that the trees get their leaves back
They start to become fruitful they starts to grow
I mean if you've you've gone from winter to spring you know how fast your the grass in your backyard starts to grow and
It looks really pretty right the vegetation starts to grow at a great rate during springtime
All right, so what we're seeing here is a bed that's fruitful a marriage bed
That's productive. You know there is actual intimacy between
Husband and wife so point number five guys is that you need to have a fruitful
Marriage bed in order for you to have a springtime marriage, and I believe this makes perfect sense
Because how does God describe children?
I'll just read to you Psalm 127 verse 3
It says low children are an heritage of the Lord and the fruits of the womb is his
Reward so if we have a marriage bed, that's green
That's productive you know then the natural consequence of that our children
Okay, natural consequence our children
And they're described as the fruits of the womb so as you know springtime you have the trees
They blossom the flowers grow and then in due time the fruit starts emerging from that tree
it's the same kind of principle point number five is you need to have a fruitful marriage bed it ought to be a
significant part of your marriage, okay
Let's go to chapter 2 song of Solomon chapter 2 verse 3 song of Solomon chapter 2 verse 3
Now this is interesting
This is the wife speaking about her husband, and she describes him as an apple tree
Okay, now you say why is that? Why is she describing him as an apple tree? Let's have a read of it verse 3 as
The apple tree among the trees of the wood so is me sorry so is my beloved among the sons I
sat down under his shadow with great delight and his fruit was sweet to my taste so
This passage might be symbolic of
Physical intimacy, but if I just take it as it is there it says so is my beloved among the sons
I sat down under his shadow with great delights
So when you go and you look for shade you know you go to the shadow of the tree. What are you seeking?
You're seeking to get under the hot sun right you're seeking to get out of the hot sun
Get a bit of comfort get it get a bit of rest
And so I believe what this is teaching us here is that you know we are as husbands
We have to provide for our wives. What are we going to provide for them?
We need to provide them some shade provide them some comfort
Okay, provide them comfort then it says and his fruits was sweet to my taste
So I guess that represents the daily necessities right eating drinking
Etc we are to provide them comfort. That's our job as men as husbands, but also to provide their daily
Necessities all right now
We won't spend so much time on that because I've covered all of that when I went through
Specifically about husbands providing for their wives, but let's look at verse number four song with Solomon chapter 2 verse 4
And I love this I love this verse here. It says he brought me to the banqueting house now
What is a banqueting house?
It's a place where you have banquets right and what's a banquet?
It's a place where you feast you enjoy you know you have guests come over
You know you you you know you enjoy a good meal you enjoy
Just the drinking and the friendships and the carrying on over all of that
But quite often in a banqueting house you would also do it in honor of an individual person
You'd give some type of respect or honor to one person when you invite people over for a banquet and
You wonder well who is this person?
Let's keep reading he brought me to the banqueting house and his banner over me was love
This is the wife speaking of her husband. He says look. He took me to the banqueting house
He took me to the public who amongst our friends and and the guests and our family and he honored me
You know what's a banner, and it's a public display. What was a public display love?
Okay, so what does that mean that means husbands?
He was publicly showing his love for his wife
Okay, so amongst his friends and his families they all knew this guy loves his wife
I mean this man wasn't the kind of man that would go to his friends and complain about his wife
And complain about a cooking and complain about a cleaning all right no that wasn't what he was doing
He wanted to show everybody in the area brought him over. Hey, let's have a feast and we're gonna honor my wife
We're going to celebrate my wife, and I'm going to do that as a public display
Hey, that's how we ought to be with our wives
That's how we're gonna have a springtime marriage when we talk about our wives
We talk about how much we love them we talk about how much we appreciate them
And so when everybody around like everyone that knows us will look at that go well. You know he truly loves his wife all right
Let's look at verse number five
This is this is the wife speaking stay me we flag ons
Flag ons is just a where you hold drinks, and then it says comfort me with apples so remember he represented the apple tree
For I am sick of love
So it's interesting there, but point number eight there is spend time together
What does she want she wants him to continually spend time with her?
Okay, point number eight if you want to have a springtime marriage is spend time together
Okay, she wants his continual presence, and then she says about the love for I am sick of love
She's not saying I am sick of my husband. Why is he always around me?
Oh, you know I want to get out of his presence. No she wants she wants his presence
What is she saying there she's saying she's lovesick
You know what it means to be lovesick
You know if it's maybe the thing about your wives
You know when you first sort of started dating her or courting her and you're trying to gain her affection and gain her attention
And you probably had those knots in your stomach, and you're like oh, man am I doing the right thing here
You know and you're and you're kind of concerned about every step you or every word you make
That's been lovesick. That's been lovesick right that that very first you know
You know a desire that you have for your wife or the wife for the husband hey this needs to
Remain to some extent in your marriage
Okay, you ought to desire one another company one another's company
And if you're the kind of person that would rather you know be away from that company
And be like you know what I've had enough of my wife
I've had enough of my husband just want to get out of here, then you're definitely not lovesick
Okay, and you're not gonna have that springtime marriage
Look at verse number six
His left hand is under my head and his right hand doth embrace me so again
We see that physical affection and instead of kissing now. They're just embracing one another right. He's holding her
Holding her and yeah
We so we definitely see that they're spending time together and the time they're spending together is in physical affection there
All right now, let's go back to chapter 1 Song of Solomon chapter 1 verse 17
Song of Solomon chapter 1 verse 17
Now remember when I when I was preaching about husbands when I was preaching about men
And I talked about how as men God has put has inbuilt certain goals in us right there are certain things that all men want
to achieve in our lives and
One of those things when you're married is to provide for your family when you go out and you work
You know you earn an income and you can put a roof over your family's head when they're eating at the dinner table
They're not going hungry when they have enough clothes to to keep themselves warm as a father as me anyway
I great that's a great satisfaction in that you know
I rejoice in that when I see my kids and they're full and the food left over actually these days the foods not left over
But anyway, you know, but when everyone's happy and fed. I'm like you know
Thank God that I've been able to provide for my family. It's great affection a great satisfaction
But look at verse 17
This is the wife speaking. She says the beams of our house a cedar
That's like the cedar tree and our rafters or the or the roof of fur
Fur is like a it's an evergreen tree. Okay, so what do you see the wife doing?
Is she complaining to her husband about the house, you know, this house is too small for us
You know, why can't you give me something better?
You know, no
She's praising her husband for being able to just put a roof over their heads
All right
And so point number nine is appreciate your husband's provision
Because if it's if it gives great satisfaction for a man to know who's provided for his family
You know one way to destroy that man is to complain about his provisions
Especially when you know, he's working hard. He's working every day, you know making a living earning a paycheck
Hey, you might not be the richest man on the planet, but he's working hard for the family
He provides for the family and then you got the wife complaining about this, you know, how they're living or whatever
You know that's going to destroy the man's life
It's going to destroy that design that satisfaction that a man has so point number ten nine was to appreciate your husband's
provisions
Okay. Now let's go to chapter three Song of Solomon chapter 3
Song of Solomon chapter 3 verse 7
Song of Solomon chapter 3 verse 7 and
As I'm going through these points, I realize I probably have more points about the men than the ladies
But that's okay because you know, man, you're the head of your wife anyway
So point number 10 is in Song of Solomon chapter 3 verse 7
It says again the wife speaking here she says behold his bed, which is Solomon's
Freescore valiant men are about it of the valiance of Israel
So she says look, you know around Solomon's bed. There's 60 freescore. There's 60 valiant men
Valiance of Israel look at verse 8
They all hold swords
Being expert in war every man have his sword upon his thigh
Why because of fear in the night?
So point number 10 guys for the men is that where to protect our wives
Okay. Now in this this time we've got Solomon and around the bed because of the fear of the night
I guess him as being the king of Israel. I guess that probably worked
Assassination attempts on them, you know, there's probably fear that the enemies would come and try to kill
Solomon or his wife or kidnap the family or whatever
So in order to to accommodate for that he would ensure his wife
Protect his wife and have these 60 men of war with swords at their sides
You know always ready at all times of the night to protect them if an enemy came
Okay now obviously
We're not in that situation
But the principle is still true
You know as husbands we need to make sure that we protect our wives that our wives know that they have security that they have safety
You know, not only the physical safety
Okay, not only are they to know that they are physically safe, you know
But also that she feels safe in your relationship that she feels secure safe
protected in your marriage
Okay
What do I mean by that? You know if you spend too much time
away from your wife
She's not going to feel
The security of having a husband there at her side, you know, man
We go to work eight hours nine hours ten eleven twelve hours, maybe more, you know of the day
You know, we need to be considerate. Hey, I need to spend time with my wife as well
Because if you spend your time elsewhere
You know what thoughts will creep into your wife mind
Is there another woman is there something else going on? You know, why doesn't my husband want to spend time with me?
Hey, you need to protect your wife. Make sure that she knows she's safe in the marriage relationship
Okay, so it's not just a physical protection
But also the emotional and the mental protection that comes with the marriage. Okay, so point number 10 was to protect your wife
Let's look at verse 11 Song of Solomon chapter 3 verse 11
Song of Solomon chapter 3 verse 11. Let's look at point 11. It says
Go forth. Oh ye daughters of Zion and behold King Solomon with the crown
Wherewith his mother crowned him in the day of his espousals
What's that about? What's the day of his espousals?
It's his wedding day
Right the day when you have a spouse is your wedding day and then it keeps going and in the day of the gladness
of his
Hearts. All right. So what does the wife say?
She says look, you know
Solomon is rejoicing
He loves to put on this crown that his mother gave him that crowned him on the day of his
Espousals on the day that he got married
What do we say to King Solomon? He likes wearing that crown
Right now we're a little bit different, but we have a society that's very similar
You know, I've got my wedding ring on right now, you know in a sense. That's the crown of my espousals
Okay, that's the day this represents a day where I made a commitment to my wife
You know, I took her as my wife. I said till death do us part and she's got something very similar
And so I wear this with pride well, I should say pride because that's a sin I wear this we've rejoicing
You know, I'm pleased to wear this and I love to wear it as a mark that I'm a married man
And you know, I'm off the radar. I'm off the market, you know
I'm not interested in finding another woman and getting married
Okay, and so it's the same thing guys if you've got your wedding ring put it on
Rejoice in the day of your marriage now, let me just say this very quickly
I don't like wearing rings
Honestly, when I'm when I'm when I'm about the house, I take this off and I put it on my bedside table
I'm surprised that I've not lost my wedding ring like because I almost never wear it at home and
Whenever I go out, I always or not always that's a lie, but I try very hard to put it on
Okay, and I especially when I came to prepare this sermon about I better put on my wedding ring tonight, you know
But sometimes because I got to my bedside table
I forget to put it on and I and I head out but when I when I head out and I don't have my wedding ring
On I feel like there's something missing and I need to put that back on
Why because I want to make sure that whoever looks at me sees this man's a married man
You know and he wears it, you know to show everyone else that he's married
And so we see this week King King Solomon
he puts on the crown of his espousals, but also notice this the second part of it says or the end part of that verse it
says and
in the day of the gladness of his heart
Hey, you know what King Solomon looks back on his marriage day on his wedding and there's gladness in his heart
He's like, yes, you know, I'm married the woman that I love
What does this mean for us?
Every year we have a wedding anniversary, don't we?
Every year we have a day that we can look back and say well, you know ten years ago five years ago
20 years ago, whatever it is. This is the day that I got married and
My point is guys point number 11 is to rejoice and celebrate your wedding anniversary
Rejoice and celebrate your wedding anniversary
Hey out of all the days of the year to celebrate I reckon that's probably number one
I reckon that's better than your birthday
All right, because you're celebrating that union between husband and wife when God made you one flesh
And if you're not celebrating that day, you're not gonna have the springtime marriage
You're not gonna be able to look back with joy and celebrate that I'll give you one example of this
Um in one of my workplaces, I worked with a I was a supervisor
I had another work colleague that was another supervisor and she comes into work one day
And she's all depressed and downcast and I'm like, hey, what's what's up? Why are you upset?
She goes, oh, you know my husband and I we had we had a fight this morning and
It's like oh, it's it's because it's our wedding anniversary and I didn't take the day off
And I'm like what and and and by the way, she was working like a late shift
So by the time she got home, it'd be too late to do anything on there, you know on their wedding anniversary
I'm like, I'm like, yeah, if I was your husband, I would also be upset
You know, this is that wedding day
You know if he took time off work to celebrate it and you're you decided to come to work
You didn't even think about it. Yeah, I'd be a little bit upset as well. You know what I told her I said look
I'll stay back. I'll work your hours, you know, don't worry about it
I'll cover your shifts, but you go home and you celebrate your wedding anniversary
All right, that was my instructor and of course she went home
I don't know
I think they went out to eat and they had a bit of fun or whatever and she came back the next day and she
Said look, I'm really thankful that I got to celebrate my wedding anniversary. Okay, but
Unfortunately
She's now divorced, you know, unfortunately, she's you know, probably committed adultery or whatever
But it's just to show you okay that when you start putting away these important days these important days of celebration
We see here in the Word of God that for Solomon is a day of rejoicing
It's a great day of joy to remember his wedding day
Hey when it comes to our wedding anniversary men, you know, let's take your wives out, you know
You know
Try to find a babysitter for your kids so you can head out if you can't find a babysitter bring the kids
You know
The kids can can enjoy anyway can celebrate as well your wives will love it your wives will look back and say hey
My husband is happy that he married me. All right, and you're able to have that springtime
marriage
Now go to chapter 5 Song of Solomon chapter 5
We're almost done here. We're up to point number 12. We've got 13 points remember
but Song of Solomon chapter 5
verse 16
Song of Solomon chapter 5 verse 16
This is the wife
talking to other ladies
Okay, so let's say this is your wife talking to other ladies in the church, for example, and this is what she says
Chapter 5 verse 16
His mouth is most sweet
Do you think your wives would say that to other ladies in the church, you know that I enjoy his company that I enjoy
You know the
You know the affection that he gives me but then he says look yay. He is all together lovely
This is my beloved and this is my friend
Hey
Husbands is your wife your friend?
Is your wife your friend?
You know wives is your husband your friend, you know, can you turn to the ladies in your in the church wives and say
My husband that's my best friend. He's a lovely man. You know, you speak well of your husband
Is there a friendship in your marriage?
Or have you lost that friendship? Can you truly turn around and say about your spouse?
This is my friend and notice that it says old daughters of Jerusalem
Meaning what she's speaking to other ladies. She's uplifting her husband. He's saying look my husband's lovely. He's awesome
And he's my friend
You know, can you say that or are your friends, you know, when you think of your friends, do you not consider your spouse?
You know, do you consider your friends your work colleagues or other people that you know or whatever etc, etc?
Hey, if you want to have a springtime marriage
Then your husband, you know wives your husband ought to be your friend
And for husbands your wife ought to be your friend and what do friends do?
They spend time together, don't they? They talk together. They have fun together. They enjoy each other's company
They share things to one another
You know, they love to hear what each each other has to say
If you want to develop a friendship, you need to have all these elements
Hey
We should have that in our marriage and more so if we're going to count them as our friend
All right, go to chapter 8 now Song of Solomon chapter 8 verse 6 Song of Solomon chapter 8
Verse 6
point number 13 guys
Song of Solomon chapter 8 verse 6
Point number 13 is be jealous of your spouse
Be jealous. Yes, you heard me right be jealous of your spouse
Because in the bible
Jealousy is a good attribute
Okay, jealousy is the attribute of something that belongs to you
Okay, it belongs to you and you want to protect it. You don't want anyone else to take it from you
All right, it's not envy
And again, I just want to make that difference because today in today's age, you know people talk of jealousy as a negative attribute
But what they really mean is is the word envy
Right, if you have something that doesn't belong to me and I want it that's been envious, you know
That's lusting about for something that does not belong to me. That is wrong
That is sinful
But if god has given something into your hands it belongs to you and you own it and you want to protect it
Okay, and my wife belongs to me. Do you think i'd be happy for my wife to just go out and spend time?
with some
Old old guy, you know some guy from a school that she grew up with
You know, you know, she comes home one day and says, you know, honey
I've just you know, i'm gonna head out tonight. I'm gonna meet up with one of my friends that I had back in school
You know is you know
And it's a guy and we're just gonna hang out for coffee for a couple of hours and catch up
Do you think as a husband I want that do you think it'd be right for me to go? Yeah, honey
That's cool. Hang out with as many guys as you want
All right, and do you think it the other way around do you think wives would you want your husband just hanging around?
With all his you know old friends, you know old maybe old girlfriends or whatever. No, you know, it should
It should be there should be a part of you that says no i'm going to be jealous for my husband
I'm going to be jealous for my wife. I'm not going to let anybody have them
All right, and we see this in the song of solomon look at chapter eight verse six song of solomon chapter eight verse six
It says set me as a seal upon thine heart. What does it mean to put a seal upon your heart?
Means it's there forever. Okay, we
You're putting a lock that you're sealing that forever that love between the two of you
As a seal upon thine arm
For love is strong as death
Jealousy is cruel as the grave
The coals thereof the coals of what the coals of jealousy are coals of fire which have a most vehement flame
Can you say that about your spouse?
That you're jealous for your spouse like a vehement flame
All right verse seven
Many waters cannot quench love
Neither can the floods drown it if a man would give all the substance of his house for love
It would be up. It would utterly be condemned
So we see that this this vehement flame of jealousy toward your spouse
Should not be able to put be put away with many waters
All right. It's a love that burns bright. It's a love that burns strong
And they belong to you
Now it doesn't if you can if you want go to chapter two song of solomon chapter 2
verse 16 song of solomon chapter 2 verse 16 the bible says
My beloved is mine
And I am his he feedeth among the lilies
So my beloved is mine
And I am his what does that mean?
That means my wife belongs to me and you know what that means about me. I belong to my wife
Okay, and if you want to protect that marriage you want to protect that relationship and you know
You should not want you know
Like I said your wife's spending time with other men or your husband's spending time with other women, you know alone
Because there ought to be jealousy godly righteous jealousy in your marriage
That's if you want the springtime marriage. Okay, that's if you want the springtime marriage
So let's wrap it up now. Let's wrap it up
In conclusion
You know, what kind of marriage do you have?
You know, can you say to me? Yep. I've got a springtime marriage. Yep. It's productive
It's green, you know, it's growing the flowers are budding
Can you say that or are you more like is your marriage more like a summertime marriage?
You know where where there's a constant heated debate. It's hot. It's a hot environment. You're constantly clashing with one another
You know, there's anger there's wrath toward one another is that your marriage more of a summertime marriage where it's extremely hot
Or do you have an autumn
Time marriage an autumn time marriage, you know where the leaves are falling off the trees
There's a bit of a downward spiral there things are getting worse
You know, there's the the branches are bare. The green is gone. The color's been faded off. It's falling off the trees
And there's no growth. There's no productivity
Do you have an auto marriage, you know
Or do you have a wintertime marriage?
Where it's ice cold, you know, no communication
You know, you don't even look at each other when you head off to work or whatever, you know, um
No communication. It's like you're strangers to one another. It's like you don't even know the man you married
You know
You don't you don't even recognize that person as the one that you you got married with or the wife that you're married with
You know, it's just ice cold like winter is your win is your marriage more of a winter time, you know
Or is it a springtime marriage? I hope it's a springtime marriage. I hope you aim to have a springtime marriage
And you might say well, you know what?
No, my marriage is not a springtime marriage. It's cold or it's hot or it's it's falling apart like an autumn or what have you?
You know, what? What do I do then? How do I make it into a springtime marriage?
Well, first of all apply the things that we just went through those 13 points and I don't think they're complicated
I think they're a lot of common sense
The book of song of solomon is is very normal very natural and I think there's a lot of just basic things that are here
That will help your marriage, you know
That's one thing but again turn to song of solomon chapter two go back to chapter two song of solomon chapter two verse ten
Song of solomon chapter two verse ten
Because what we'll see in this book
Is they did not start off with a springtime marriage
Okay, as we start this song it did not start with the springtime
All right, look at verse number ten song of solomon chapter two verse ten
My beloved spake and said unto me
Rise up, my love my fair one and come away
Hey, the first thing that you're going to do to fix your marriage is to talk to your beloved and say look let's come away
Let's go together. Let's make a change in our marriage
Verse 11. Why are they going away?
For lo the winter is past the rain is over and gone
Do you think they had a springtime marriage to begin with?
They were in winter time
Right things were cold things were wet and they just made a decision
Hey, we need to get out of this season. We need to get into springtime
Okay, verse 12 the flowers appear on the earth the time of the singing of birds is come
And the voice of the turtle that's a total dove is heard in our land
The fig tree put forth of green figs and the vines with the tender grape give a good smell
Arise my love my fair one and come away
Let's let's give this another shot. All right, let's let's go away. Let's go and enjoy a springtime marriage
Let's get away from the winter. Let's get away from the cold
Let's get away from the wet
But what it takes to get to the springtime marriage is a conscious conscious decision with husband and wife to make a change
Okay to read the song of solomon and say hey, how can we apply this to our marriage? How can we improve our relationship?
And you might say I don't know I don't know if I have enough love anymore, you know
Yeah, when we got married we we had great love for one another but i'm just not feeling that anymore
It's just not the same as it used to be
And if you feel that way that's a sad thing, okay, that's a sad thing but here's the truth of it
When you got married
And when you try to win over your wife or you try to win over your husband you had a great love for that individual
It's there it's there you just need to find it once again
And there's something that I learned there's a principle that I learned
Um in two different ways and and uh, let me just i'll give you one example
in one of my workplaces
They created a new department and I was involved in being part of that
um
And because it was a new department there weren't a lot of um, there weren't a lot of rules
There weren't a lot of boundaries there weren't a lot of instructions
And so I took it upon myself to sort of organize the area, you know
I wasn't even I wasn't even like a team leader. I wasn't a supervisor or anything like that
I just tried to make the place more effective more efficient more productive
Um, I tried to make the work to to go a lot smoother and I spent a good couple of years just working hard
In making this department something more organized more structured where people wanted to come and actually work there
All right
And so I got it to a point where it was running really smoothly
I actually enjoyed going to work because it was so easy, you know, things were working really well
And um, and then one of my manager
Wanted to give me a a new position. Okay, and I was excited about the new position. I was really excited to learn something new
But because I spent so much time
Working on that department trying to organize things trying to put things in order trying to make it run as smooth as possible
even when I left
My heart was over there
And you say well, how can you love a department? I tell you why because I put a lot of work into it
I put a lot of effort into it and I didn't realize that at the time. It's not like I just love it
Oh
It's just the amount of work and the effort the mental energy that goes into it
You know, I felt like I was leaving my baby when I left it
All right, because I put so much work into it and I loved that that department and then the people working there. All right
Give you another example of this
When I was a teenager in high school, uh, my best friend who was going on holidays for two weeks
And he had a a pet bird just a tame parrot it was like a a peach face parrot something like this
and
I didn't care for the bird that much but he asked me if I can look after it while he was gone for two weeks
So they brought the bird over and of course being a tame bird, you know
It needs a bit of interaction. It needs interaction with the human a little bit
So, you know you start off by just making sure there's food for the bird every day
Making sure the bird has a little bit of water, you know, and uh when the bird poops, you know
Cleaning out the tray and putting new paper there and making you know, making the cage nice and fresh
And because he was tame and he couldn't fly away, you know
I put my finger in the bird would jump in my hand and i'd pull it out
And the bird wants an affection the bird just wanted to sit there and be with a human because it was tame
It's been tamed since he was a little baby
anyway
As the days went by guess what happened to him?
Just because i'm trying to look after that bird I started to love the bird
I started to really appreciate that bird, you know, and then when my friend came back from holidays
I said I don't want to give you back the bird
I've looked after it for these two weeks. I've got a bit of a connection with it now
But I didn't start off by loving the bird, you know, all I did was work hard, you know
Make sure it was provided for make sure that I was doing the best I could to you know
When my friend got back that he didn't have that bird back
But as I worked hard on it
I grew an affection to it my love for that bird grew
My point is this and I think this is where a lot of marriages get it wrong
It's like i'll do all these things. Yes, you know, i'll be submissive to my husband. Yes, you know
I'll provide for my wife and i'll be there for my wife, you know, but I just got to find that love once again
No, you got it upside down
You do what god has asked from you you do your roles and your responsibilities
You do these things that we saw in the song of solomon and that love will come back that love will grow
Because you're spending time you're making efforts you're using mental energy and you're physical and you're trying, you know
You're buying her gifts and you're showing affection and love and and i'm telling you now
your love will grow if you think that love has has
Is almost gone it can come back
It can come back even better than on your marriage day even better when you first laid your eyes on him on her
Okay
And i'll tell you with all honesty
all honesty
I love my wife more than i've ever loved her
All right
Except I can't remember how far we're married now. Is it 14 years?
14 you okay 14 years married. All right, 10 kids and I love her more than ever
Okay, I see how much she works provide to look after me to look for the house
You know to make sure we're fed and all those kinds of things
And my appreciation and love has grown and i'm really happy about that. I'm really happy about that. I can honestly say I love her more
Than I loved her when I married her
Okay, and it's simply because you know
We're doing the best we can in following the roles and responsibilities that god has laid out in scriptures
And god's way is always the best way
Okay, you don't need to go to the psychiatrist
And the and the marriage counselor and the you know, you don't need that you just need to open the word of god
And I think if you want to have the springtime marriage, I would recommend husbands and wives
Just sit down open up the song of solomon and go hey, let's just read this. There's how many chapters are there?
I think it's eight chapters
Let me have a quick look
Eight chapters you can read one chapter each read it to one another and see what you can gain from there
This is the word of god, you know, god wants you to have that sweet springtime marriage
He wants you to get out of that winter out of that autumn out of that summer and apply these things to your marriage
And again guys this church will only be as strong as the families and as the marriages that are here. All right, let's pray