Alright all, please find your seats and grab your hymnals.
Please find your seats and grab your hymnals.
Thanks for coming for the afternoon service.
If you've got your hymnals, please turn to hymn number 33.
Hymn number 33.
We'll begin by singing Christ the Lord is risen today.
Hymn number 33.
You can stay seated for this one.
Hymn number 33.
Christ the Lord is risen today.
Hymn number 33.
You can stay seated for this one.
Hymn number 33.
You can stay seated for this one.
Hymn number 33.
You can stay seated for this one.
Okay, Proverbs chapter 10.
Proverbs chapter 10.
Let's pray.
God, thank you for the day that you give us, Lord, that we are able to come together in unity.
We just pray that you open our hearts, our ears, and be able to receive what's coming out of our pastor's mouth, Lord, that we might endure with your understanding.
In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.
Thanks, brother.
So in preparation for the sermon, in fact, it wasn't really a sermon.
This week I've been meditating upon the privilege that I have to serve as a pastor.
I often think about the kind of work jobs that we all have, jobs that I've had in the past.
Often when you work a job, you're producing something with your hands.
You can see the productivity of your work.
You can show or you can measure your KPIs.
You can measure how well you're doing compared to other people.
And I was just thinking about the privilege of being a pastor and the fact that my main job is to just basically open my mouth.
And I kind of feel like, man, I'm not even that good at opening my mouth.
I'm just thinking about what kind of work have you given me, Lord, where people are willing to come to church and listen to me speak.
And it's a bit, you know, it's sobering to think that God can use my mouth to produce something in people's lives
or to teach something that I don't feel I'm even qualified to teach.
You know, the things of God, I'm just a man. How do I teach my fellow man the things of God?
But I was looking at Proverbs chapter 10, verse number 21, Proverbs 10, 21, it says,
The lips of the righteous feed many, but fools die for once or lack of wisdom.
And, you know, my main job as a pastor is to feed the sheep.
You know, there are different responsibilities that pastors have, but the primary responsibility is to feed the sheep.
And I often think about this concept. I hear it a lot from different people.
You know, I'm not being fed. You know, I don't feel like I'm receiving much wisdom from God's word
or I've gone to church and my pastor only reads two verses and the rest is the wisdom of man.
And I just think about my responsibility as a pastor is to feed the sheep.
The lips of the righteous feed many. It's my hope, it's my desire that as I preach,
you know, you guys not only see my limitations and weaknesses as a man,
but you can see a man being utilized by God to give something worthwhile,
something that you can take away and learn from and you can apply it to your life.
And, again, I was just meditating on my own responsibilities as a pastor.
And as I was thinking about these things, I thought I'll turn this into a sermon.
But it says the second part of that verse, right, it says,
but fools die for want of wisdom or lack of wisdom.
I don't want to be a foolish pastor.
You know, I don't want to be the kind of guy that just has no wisdom,
that can't teach anything behind this book, but that profits you nothing.
That's a fool. You know, I want to be the righteous. I want to be that man that feeds many.
That's the responsibility that God has given me.
And so the title for the sermon this afternoon is Be Wise With Your Words.
Now, we look at the Book of Proverbs.
The Book of Proverbs is going to be the main book that we look at.
And, of course, the Book of Proverbs is known as the Book of Wisdom.
So the title for the sermon, as I said, is Be Wise With Your Words.
And, of course, this doesn't just go for pastors.
I want to take some principles here and apply it to our everyday life
because we all have mouths. We all have a tongue.
We all have a voice. We're all able to speak one to another.
And sometimes the things that come with our mouth can be very destructive.
Sometimes our tongue just isn't on board, you know, with the will of God.
You know, I'll quickly read to you from Acts 20, verse 28.
Paul writes these words to pastors.
It says, Take heed, therefore, unto yourselves,
and to all the flock which the Holy Ghost have made you overseers,
to feed, I'll read that again, to feed the church of God,
which you have purchased with his own blood.
What a privilege to be able to feed God's people the Word.
And so I need the wisdom.
I need the righteousness of the Lord in my life to be able to do that,
to be able to be productive with my speech and with my words,
that you learn something from God's Word.
And you can say, Yes, I'm profiting from being under this pastor's teaching.
And let me also quickly read to you another passage.
You stay in Proverbs because most of our passages are in Proverbs.
So James chapter 3, James chapter 3, verse number 6.
And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity.
So is the tongue among our members,
that it defileth the whole body, and set upon fire the course of nature,
and it is set on fire of hell.
When you think about hell, hellfire, what is that?
It's the judgment, it's the wrath, it's the anger of God.
You know, our tongue can produce this wrath and anger in the wrong place,
in the wrong ways.
The most harmful part of our body, believe it or not, is our tongue.
I mean, we can do wicked things with our hands,
we can do wicked things with our feet,
but the thing that causes the most damage can be our tongue.
And we all have it.
And if I know my tongue can cause great damage,
then how much do I have to control this tongue when I preach God's Word?
I want to teach God's people.
It's got to be a battle, it's a battle, you know?
What is God saying and what is my tongue wanting to say?
And I want to allow what God has to say to win that battle.
It continues in verse number 7,
For every kind of beast and of birds and of serpents and of things in the sea
is tamed and have been tamed of mankind,
but the tongue can no man tame.
It is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison.
Wow. Your tongue, this is your tongue, brethren.
You know, it's unruly evil, full of deadly poison is your tongue.
You can cause a lot of damage, you can cause a lot of hurt.
You can defile people with your tongue if you're not careful.
It says no man can tame the tongue.
So if you can't tame your tongue, who's going to tame your tongue for you?
Of course, it's got to be the Lord.
You've got to go, Lord, my tongue's out of control.
My tongue's causing damage.
Even if I try, Lord, I can't tame it.
I need your help to tame my tongue.
And so as I said, the title for the sermon this afternoon is
Be Wise With Your Words. Be Wise With Your Words.
So what we're going to do is we're going to just go through the Book of Proverbs.
We're going to look at different passages, not all of them because there's so many of them,
but many of them which speak of our tongue or our lips or our mouth
and what kind of advice can we get, what kind of wisdom can we get
when it comes to controlling our mouth.
So come with me to Proverbs chapter 4. Let's start there.
Proverbs chapter 4 and verse number 24.
Proverbs 4, 24 reads,
Put away from thee a froward mouth,
and perverse lips put far from thee.
What does it mean to have a froward mouth?
The word froward means a mouth that is contrary,
like a disobedient mouth, right,
where you may receive instruction but you can't help but talk back.
You can't help but answer back in retaliation.
That is a froward mouth, a froward mouth, okay.
Now look, obviously, I'm going to speak contrary to the world, right.
Obviously, as a pastor, as I preach God's word, it's going to be contrary to society.
But if God is telling us to put away from us a froward mouth,
perversely, the word perverse is very similar,
perverse means contrary to expectation, all right.
If God is saying put this mouth away from you,
what would be the right context of that situation?
Because again, it is right for me to be contrary to the world as I preach God's word.
But you see, there's a time when you need to withhold your mouth.
And of course, that is when someone has authority over you.
If somebody in authority over you is asking something from you
and you can't help but talk back, have that froward and perverse mouth,
and you're fighting back, you know, mums and dads give instruction to the children
and the children talk back, you know, seemingly knowing better.
God is telling you take that mouth away from you.
It's a froward, it's a perverse mouth.
Employer relationships, same thing, right.
When your boss asks something from you and you talk back and say no, boss.
You know what, you need to learn to control that mouth.
You know, it's damaging, Brevin.
You know what, if you've got someone in authority over you,
you know what, learn to be submissive.
You know, learn that your will is not always the right way.
It's the one in authority over me.
Again, you apply this in all areas of authority.
Christ, the Lord God has authority.
When you hear something from his word, you don't just say,
no, Lord, I'm not going to do that.
You say, well, Lord, help me then.
If I'm naturally going to be contrary to these things,
you know, before I open my mouth, open your mouth and say, Lord, help me.
Before I open my mouth and be contrary to the things that you want me to do.
So, you know, you need to learn.
If you're under authority, if you're under authority, hold that mouth.
Don't let it be forward.
Don't let it be perverse, okay.
Whoever your authority is, yes, Dad, I'll do that.
Yes, Mum, I'll go ahead and do that, even if I don't want to.
Even if in my heart.
I'm not talking about sinful things here.
I'm just saying when you're being given instruction, say, yes, I'll go and do that.
Control your mouth, okay.
You don't want that tongue to bring forth the fires of hell,
cause destruction and damage in relationships.
You know, one thing that I learned so that, again, I'll share just these things with you
is I really kind of covered it in the first sermon there tonight
where if you are like a middle manager
and your manager asks you to lead your team a certain way
but you feel like you're not even on board with your manager
and it's that tough situation.
One thing that I learned is that I can respond.
I can share my concerns if you do it the right way.
You put away the forward mouth, the perverse lips, you put that away
and you just go to your boss and say, boss, look, I know what you said
and you are the boss and we'll do it your way if we have to.
It's fine.
But I just want to share my concerns just in regards to this, if that's okay.
Can I just have five minutes, ten minutes of your time?
I know what you want and you're the boss.
You call the shots.
Whatever you decide, we'll go and do what you want to do.
But here are my concerns, if I can share them with you.
And I found by doing that on the job, more often than not,
your boss, if you approach him the right way,
he's going to want to hear what you have to say.
Your boss did not get into that position out of ignorance.
He obviously understands and values the employees that he has under him
and many times I've been able to share with my boss my concerns,
not with a throw at speaking, not being rude, not being contrary to them,
just saying, hey, look, I think this can be done differently,
you know, or this can be, you know, I don't think this is going to work for us.
This can work better.
Again, but, hey, boss, that's what I think.
Whatever you decide at the end of the day, that's your call.
That's your, you know, and I'm behind you, whatever you decide.
And sometimes the boss goes, you know what, you're right.
I've not really thought about those things.
Thanks for sharing that with me.
And they've changed their approach.
Other times, no, it's my way or the highway.
You know what, it's like, whoa, boss, you're the boss.
And one thing that I learnt, especially, you know, with the privileges
of being able to have, you know, things like email in our day,
you know, internet and things like this,
is that I learnt to start to document things.
Because if I feel like, okay, boss has asked me to carry out
a certain responsibility, I think there's going to be problems.
I think this is going to cause damage.
And when things don't work out the way he thinks it's going to work out,
I could be at fault, I could get the blame here.
So what I've done is then I've gone to my computer, sat down,
hey, boss, thanks for meeting with me for the last, you know,
for the last 10 minutes.
Understand what you want to do.
And, you know, as I said, you know, you're the boss.
Happy for you to call the shots.
So I will do X, Y and Z, whatever you ask me to do.
I will document that, send it in an email.
Why?
Because if things didn't work out, if things did collapse,
if things didn't, you know, if, you know,
it didn't work out the way the boss wants.
I had, well, hey, I did what the boss wants.
If you want to attack me, if you want to have a go at me at someone,
you know, at the failure of this task, oh, just so you know,
look, boss told me to do it.
You know, if this is an issue with you, you need to speak to my boss.
Or if my boss says, hey, Kevin, didn't work out,
yeah, yeah, remember I shared my concerns with you?
And, you know, remember I sent you that email?
Explain again afterwards, after that conversation.
But again, I'm not attacking him, right?
I'm just protecting myself.
But without the forward mouth, without the perverse lips.
And this is being wise with your words, being careful about what you speak,
you know, being respectful for those that God has put over you.
Come with me to Proverbs 6, Proverbs 6 and verse number 1.
Proverbs 6 and verse number 1.
By the way, you know, God has given me authority in the church.
And I appreciate, I want you to know this,
because I don't want you to feel afraid if you have concerns about church,
if you have concerns about the way we do things,
the times that we meet, the amount of songs that we sing.
I'm more than happy for you to share those concerns to me.
I want you to know that.
Like, this is your church.
This is not my church.
This is our church, right?
Church of the congregation.
I want to hear what you have to say.
You know, if there's something that we can improve,
something you're willing to do that's been neglected, let me know.
You know, again, don't have the forward,
and you guys generally have been very good.
It's not like you've had the forward mouth or, you know, perverse lips,
or even sometimes when I preach,
sometimes I have people come to challenge me.
You go, hey, pastor, you know, I've seen it like this actually in the Bible.
But it's always been respectful.
And I actually like that.
I actually like it when people have something to say,
because I can learn in return, can't I?
But you don't want to be the person with the forward mouth and the perverse lips.
Anyway, Proverbs 6, please.
Proverbs 6, verse number 1.
How else can we be careful with our mouth?
It says, my son, if thou be surety for thy friend,
if thou hast stricken thy hand with a stranger,
thou art snared with the words of thy mouth,
thou art taken with the words of thy mouth.
You know what verse number 2 is saying?
That we can cause a snare as a trap.
We can trap ourselves with our own mouths.
All right?
And, you know, the father who is speaking to his son is saying,
be careful about the legal or financial agreements you get involved with
with your friends.
He says here, if thou be surety.
In other words, basically, you've, you know, you've put yourself down.
If your friend takes out a loan, and if you can't pay for it,
basically, you're saying that you'll cover the costs.
You know, you're trying to be a good friend.
You're trying to help him out in a tough situation.
And now you, by your own mouth, you know, have said,
yes, I'll make sure that the loan gets paid.
And so this is a concern.
This can happen.
You know, where you're too friendly.
You're too accommodating to certain people.
And you're like, yeah, yeah, no worries.
Put me down.
I'll be the legal leg that you can stand on in case things fall over.
Well, the Bible is saying here that if you do that,
you've trapped yourself.
You know, you've trapped yourself with the words of your mouth.
Because if you look at it again in verse number one,
my son, if thou be surety for thy friend,
if thou hast stricken thy hand with a stranger.
Friend and stranger, obviously not referring to close family
or anything like that.
These are other people.
You know, you've put yourself down there.
And then it gives you this instruction in verse number three.
Do this now, my son, and deliver thyself.
He says, look, you know what you need to do, son?
Get yourself out of this situation.
You've put yourself in this situation.
It's dangerous for you.
You've trapped yourself.
So he goes, look, get yourself out.
Deliver thyself.
When thou art come into the hand of thy friend,
go humble thyself and make sure thy friend.
Go to your friend and say, look, I made a terrible mistake here.
Hey, I still love you.
I'm your friend.
I want the best for you.
But this is something that I can't follow through with.
You know, get your own family.
Get someone else to take care of that need.
Then he says in verse number four,
give not sleep to thine eyes, nor slumber to thine eyelids.
He goes, don't even sleep.
Don't even relax.
Verse number five, deliver thyself as a row from the hand of the hunter
and as a bird from the hand of the fowler.
You know, we have to be careful as to what we commit ourselves to,
especially if you're putting yourself down as security
for a friend's loan or some type of financial agreement that they've got.
Now, look, your friend's not the hunter.
The friend's not the one trapping you.
It was your own mouth that we saw earlier, right?
Your friend's a friend.
You know, you're trying to help your friend out in a tough situation,
but you should not have overcommitted yourself like that.
Be careful as to what you promise.
Be careful what you sign up to legally and financially.
You know, I mean, maybe the closest to this is, you know,
when my wife and I, we bought our first house, you know,
my parents put themselves down as guarantors, you know,
and the idea there is, oh, if I can't pay the loan,
then my parents have to pay for it, or their property, you know,
if the property that I have is not worth the value of the loan,
then my parents would have to sell their house to pay off the loan.
It is a bit of a tough, dangerous situation.
Of course, that's family.
We're looking here at friends or strangers, but be careful.
You know, be careful about these kinds of agreements
that you get yourself into.
It's a trap.
And I remember, you know, thankful for my parents to be guarantors
so we could actually get the loan, but as soon as I could,
I went to my bank and said,
look, when can you remove my parents as guarantors?
I don't want my parents to potentially lose their house
if I become neglectful with paying back the mortgage or whatever it is.
But you can see how our tongues not currently cause damage to other people
but can cause damage for ourselves.
And the instruction that God has given us,
get yourself out of those situations.
You know, try to remove yourself as much.
Don't even go to sleep.
Remove yourself from these situations because they can be extremely harmful.
Now, I'm going to quickly read to you from Luke 6, 35, which says,
these are the words of Christ,
but love ye your enemies and do good,
then it says these words, and lend,
now this is really important, something I had to learn in my life,
and lend hoping for nothing again.
If someone comes to you and says,
look, can you help me financially or whatever it is,
you know, some possession, can you lend this?
Then only be willing to lend what you're able to lose.
Don't overcommit yourself.
Okay, that's what Christ is teaching us, all right?
And then he says, and your reward shall be great.
God will reward you for this.
And you shall be the children of the highest,
for he is kind unto the unthankful.
Kind unto the unthankful and to the evil.
You know how I learnt this?
There have been times that I've lent money to people, to my friends.
I'll pay back.
It still hasn't been paid back.
And that's my friend.
Like, a friend asks, you know what, I'm your friend.
I have it.
I have the ability to lend you, so I will.
And it's not even so much about that money that's missing out of my pockets,
it's more about how could my friend, so-called friend,
not care enough to return what he asked for?
And that bothered me.
That hurt me.
You know, it caused tension in friendship.
And I'm thinking, man, was this even my friend?
You know what I mean?
That's the issue when you lend expecting something in return.
You say, well, we should expect it to be paid back.
Yeah, kind of, right?
If he is a good friend, he'll do that.
But I've learnt over the years, as these things happened,
is, you know what, I'm only going to lend what I'm willing to lose.
And if I lose it, there's great reward.
We just saw there.
God rewards you, you know, for what you lose.
You know, just by lending.
And that's why you've got to be careful.
You know, be careful what you commit yourself to.
And I just find it easier now, instead of lending,
I'd rather just go, you know, someone's in a tough financial situation
and I can help.
Here it is. Here's a gift.
I don't even think about it anymore.
Because I want to think of you as a friend.
I don't want to think about you having to pay it back.
Or if you don't, how does that affect our relationship?
How does that affect our friendship?
I don't want that situation to develop.
And so, you know, Christ has just warned us about being over-committed.
You know, especially financially.
You know, the words that we speak.
Be mindful.
Think about, you know, can you afford to lose that?
Or can you not?
You know, earlier in my life, I could be a lot more generous.
You know, today, these days, I can't be as generous as I have been in the past.
You know, but just be mindful about what you speak.
Because it can be a trap.
It's not that your friend has trapped you.
It's you've trapped yourself by over-committing.
Okay, can we meet to Proverbs chapter 6, please.
Sorry, Proverbs chapter 12.
Proverbs chapter 12 and verse number 14.
Proverbs 12 and verse number 14.
The Bible reads,
A man shall be satisfied with good by the fruit of his mouth,
and the recompense of a man's hands shall be rendered unto him.
You know what will give you satisfaction in life?
You say, having all my bills paid off.
You know, owning my own property is not good.
You say, having all my bills paid off.
You know, owning my own properties and all this.
You know what gives real satisfaction in life right here?
A man shall be satisfied with good by the fruit of his mouth.
You know, when you use your mouth for good.
You know, when you come alongside somebody and you can encourage them.
You know, when you come alongside someone and you tell them that you love them
and that you're praying for them.
You know, and you care for them and you want them to do well in life.
You know, or you're able to give a good word of advice because you see someone struggling.
You know what, when you do good for other people, even with your own mouth,
the Bible says it's going to satisfy you.
It's going to give you joy.
It's going to give you contentment.
Wow, you know, God utilised me to help someone else.
It's such a strange thing we've got in our mouths, like right here in my face.
It can set on fire, hell, or it can do great good.
And it's like this all the time.
And brethren, you've got to think, man, God's given me my mouth,
He's given my lips, He's given my tongue.
I want to use it for good.
Because not only is it going to help the person that I'm speaking to,
but it's going to give me contentment.
It's going to make me feel good about myself because I've been able to help other people.
And not only that, the second part of verse 14 says,
And a recompense of a man's hands shall be rendered unto him.
You know what God is saying?
If you say good things to people, if you help people by the words of your mouth,
God's going to make sure it gets rewarded back to you.
You know, we call this reaping what you sow, as it were.
Like there is this universal law, you know, in God's creation,
that you know what, if you do good for others, God's going to make sure you get recompensed for that.
So is it worth doing good? Absolutely.
Is it worth speaking kind words, words of encouragement, words of love, good words of advice?
Of course it is worth it. You're going to get rewarded for it by God.
There's another verse that's very similar. I want you to see this. Come with me to Proverbs 18.
Come with me to Proverbs 18 and verse number 20.
It's very similar, but it's got something else that I want you to notice.
Proverbs 18 verse number 20.
It says, A man's belly shall be satisfied with food, with a good steak.
Now this is a little bit deeper than just the physical needs here, right?
A man's belly shall be satisfied with the fruit of his mouth.
You know, are you lacking contentment? Are you lacking satisfaction in life?
You know, do you feel like you're just not achieving what you should be achieving in life?
Why don't you just start with the words of your mouth?
Why don't you just start by being a positive influence to people?
It says there that that's going to satisfy your belly.
You know, like a good meal satisfies you when you're hungry, right?
Like a good drink of water satisfies you when you're thirsty.
When you feel like you're not accomplishing much in life, you're lacking contentment.
You know what? You just open your mouth with kindness to your fellow brother,
you know, to your fellow sister, and the Lord says it's going to satisfy your belly in the same way.
So you can see it's very similar to what we read there in Proverbs 12.
And then it says, and with the increase of his lips shall he be filled.
So the more you increase with your lips, the more you're going to be filled, right?
But verse number 21 is the change, the difference that I want you to notice there.
Death and life are in the power of the tongue.
Look how powerful your tongue is.
You can use your tongue for life, for positive things, positive outlook, positive conversations,
or you can use it for death.
Talking negatively, critically, you know, casting people down,
you know, just looking at things always with a critical eye,
open your mouth for everything that's negative and bad, or you can use it for life.
It's your choice, you know, which way you go.
You know, I guess really when you assess your own life, and when I assess my own tongue,
it's been used for both.
There's been times that I've used it for life.
There have been times that I've used it for death.
There are times that I've used it to help and to profit people.
There are times that I've used it to destroy people.
And what we want to do, because we know that we're rewarded for that which is good,
we want to make sure that we shift, right, the percentage of what we speak
to things that are good and profitable, things that are encouraging,
you know, things that will please the Lord and minimize or completely remove the things that are destructive.
Because it says in Verse 21,
death and life are in the power of the tongue,
and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.
If you love death, you're going to eat of that fruit.
If you like to use your mouth to destroy, your life will be destroyed.
You know, if you use your mouth to criticize, you will be criticized.
God's going to make sure it's all balanced somehow in life.
See, I started to realize something as I was going through the problems here about your mouth.
Sometimes people say, well, you know, I'm an excessively negative person.
I'm just constantly saying bad things and looking things from a bad light because I had a bad life.
And so because I've had a bad life, I speak bad things.
Because I've had negative experiences in life, you know, I see everything through a negative lens.
Well, you know what, if you keep that up, your whole life is going to be negative.
It's never going to turn around. It's never going to change.
It's constantly going to be destructive. You're constantly going to break friendships.
You're constantly going to be in arguments and fighting and contentions all the days of your life.
You know, problems and trials are always there in life. Always.
By the way, kids, you're going to go through times of trials and difficulties.
They come in. All right?
And your parents, as good as much as they love you, we're not always the best teachers.
But learn from the Lord. Learn from the book. Learn from the Bible.
Learn how to have a positive outlook, even when things go bad.
Learn to have a positive outlook when things aren't going according to how you think they should be going.
When you're having trials and difficulties and I know what it's like, too.
I know what it's like to go, Lord, why? Why am I going through this?
But the right response is, Lord, thank you. Teach me. Guide me.
What do you want me to learn, Lord? Are you correcting me?
Are you chastising me? Good. It's for my profit.
Have the positive outlook, the silver lining as it is.
Every cloud has a silver lining, they say.
Think about what your mouth speaks and learn to tame it by the power of the Lord.
Because you can't tame it yourself.
Because if you go for a problem, a hardship, and all you have is complaints and whining
and it's all so bad and life is horrible, your life will continue in that trajectory.
It's easy to thank the Lord when things are going well.
It's not easy to thank the Lord when things are going bad.
When you're going through some major problem, it's hard to thank the Lord.
But what thanksgiving do you think is of a greater value to God?
When you're going through the good times or when you're going through the hard times?
When you're going through the hard times and you can say, Lord, thank you.
Lord, teach me. Lord, guide me.
How much do you think that pleases your father?
How much more does that please your father than just thanking him in the good times?
It seems to me as I'm going through this, your life can have a major uplift.
The negative aspects of your life can change so dramatically to a positive outlook.
You just have to fix this mouth.
It just seems to me, wow, this is the truth of God's word.
Again, you reap what you sow.
I'm just saying, if you don't like your life right now, you're not happy with it,
change what you speak about.
You can't necessarily change how you feel.
You may not necessarily change how you think right away,
but you can change what your mouth is speaking.
There's a lot of times that there are things that I want to say
and I just have to process that for a moment in my life, in my mind.
Is that the right thing to say?
I might be feeling this way, but is it right for me to project that out of my mouth?
So you've got to have a filter between your mind and your heart and your mouth.
Is this the right thing to say?
Or do I need to look at this from a positive perspective?
And as it passes through that filter of my mind and it changes,
that challenge changes to a positive outlook that's going to come out of my mouth.
Remember, out of the abundance of your heart, the mouth speaketh.
So you need time to meditate.
You need time to stop and really consider, what words am I speaking?
Are they to profit?
Are they positive things?
Are they good things?
Because if they are, then I know that my life will be shaped into a positive sense as God sees fit.
He sees what we talk about and He gives us what we speak of.
It's amazing to me as I was going through this.
This is repeated over and over again in the book of Proverbs.
Can you come with me to Proverbs 13. Proverbs 13 verse number 3. Proverbs 13 and verse number 3.
You might say, well Pastor, I just have nothing positive to say.
I just got nothing positive. I got nothing that's valuable or I got nothing good to say.
Notice Proverbs 13 verse number 3.
He that keepeth his mouth keepeth his life, but he that openeth wide his lips shall have destruction.
You know what? If you have nothing positive to say, nothing profitable to say,
and all that's going to come out of your mouth is critical things, destructive things,
then keep your mouth. Close it. Don't let the words come out.
Because you might be the opposite. You might be the other one here.
He that openeth wide his lips, look, shall have destruction.
Someone that opens wide his lips, we'll call that a loud mouth, won't we?
Opens his mouth. This is a warning against people that have loud mouths.
One who talks a lot, you know, with stupid or immature or offensive words.
Someone who is highly opinionated. You've got to throw your two cents into every conversation.
You've got to give your opinion about everything, even if no one's asked you for it.
The loud mouth will have destruction because it's foolishness.
You know what? I've got nothing to say here. All right, keep your mouth shut.
You know, the loud mouth will often wonder, why does nobody want to talk to me?
Because no one wants to hear from you, if that's you.
You've given your opinion one too many times. You've spoken foolishness one too many times.
And people just don't want to hear that anymore. Why don't people want to talk to me?
Maybe you've got to keep your opinions to yourself. Close your mouth sometimes and listen.
Learn how to listen instead of opening your mouth.
But I want you to notice that again. Verse number three.
He that openeth wide his lips shall have destruction.
Okay? I mean, you want a destroyed life? You want a life full of negativity?
Go ahead and open your mouth and speak all kinds of foolishness.
Give your opinions about everything. Offend everybody. Talk, you know, foolishness all the time.
And you'll destroy your life.
So, come with me to the next chapter. Proverbs chapter fourteen. Proverbs chapter fourteen.
And verse number three. Proverbs chapter fourteen and verse number three.
It says, in the mouth of the foolish is a rod of pride.
But the lips of the wise shall preserve them.
What I want you to notice here is the rod of pride. Okay?
In the mouth of the foolish is a rod of pride.
Now, in the book of Proverbs, we have another rod that's mentioned, which I'll read to you very quickly.
In Proverbs twenty-two verse fifteen, it says, foolishness is bound in the heart of a child,
but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.
The Bible says here, children, that you will have foolishness in your heart.
And by the way, adults have foolishness in their heart as well.
This is something that's bound up in the heart of a child.
The rod of correction is needed to drive that from you. Okay?
The rod of correction is an action, you know, it's a loving action of your parents.
Your parents want that foolishness removed from you.
Your parents do not want you to be fools.
Your parents want you to be wise, mature, you know, grown up, making the best decisions for your life.
So the rod of correction is a good thing to utilise.
But I want you to notice there's another rod here.
That rod being in Proverbs fourteen verse three.
In the mouth of the foolish is a rod of pride.
So, you know, you would use that rod of correction, you know, to correct your child.
Well, the foolish will use the rod of pride.
They're so full of pride, and in their pride, they will tear down other people.
Right?
They think so full of themselves that they've got to tear down others so they feel good about themselves.
You know, sometimes when I get up to preach, I know something I'm about to say.
I know something in God's word here is going to hurt somebody in my church.
Okay?
But I want it to be a rod of correction.
It's what I want it to be.
Right?
A rod of correction.
Not a rod of pride.
Like, the last thing I want to do is to be some type of pastor where I just elevate myself all the time and tear you guys down.
That's not what I want.
You know, I want to edify you. I want to build you guys up.
And in return, I want you guys to build me up in return.
And, brothers and sisters, we encourage and build and love and support one another.
That's the goal.
Like, I need your support as much as, you know, I want to support you.
Because we're just human beings trying to do the best we can for the Lord Jesus Christ in this life.
But let's never be the people that have the rod of pride.
We tear down others.
Oh, look at me. I'm such a better person.
That is a fool.
That man is a fool.
And it's just, it's the way of the world.
You know, people feel so, like honestly they feel so low about themselves that the only way they can elevate themselves is by tearing other people down.
Please don't tear each other down.
Please don't just bite and devour one another with your words.
I know that you don't all agree eye to eye with every family in this church.
Like, I know if we just gave to our flesh and we just gave to the destructive lips of our tongues, we could all just tear each other up in this church.
We could all just rebuke each other and that's not the way you raise your kids and that's not the way you should do your family and that's not right and this is not.
You could do it and it's been done and it's just destructive.
That's a fool.
You're a fool for doing that.
You want to be wise.
Be careful with this mouth.
Be careful.
You know, and I realize, you know, again when I was thinking about my job, my job is to open my mouth and to teach people how easy would it be for me to just become so foolish and just teach the wisdom of Kevin Sepulveda.
You know, if I just give into my flesh and give into the things that, the defects that I have and the weaknesses of man that I struggle with and to utilize that tongue, it will destroy this church.
We have the ability to destroy this church.
Each one of us has the ability in our mouths to destroy this church.
It's foolishness is what it is.
So, yeah, you know, as I said to you, I've just been meditating on this myself.
Like, what a privilege to be able to just open my mouth and teach God's Word.
I don't even know why God allows me to do this.
Like, I don't feel like I'm, I don't think I've got anything.
Again, if not for God's Word, there'd be nothing to preach.
There'd be nothing to say if not for God's Word.
So, just be careful with your mouth.
Come with me to Proverbs 15.
Proverbs 15.
Proverbs 15, verse number 23.
And a lot of these problems are very similar.
But there's always, it's always a little bit different.
There are different elements that you can focus on.
In Proverbs 15, verse 23, it says,
A man hath joy by the answer of his mouth.
Again, it's that contentment, that satisfaction.
You know, you give a good answer, it gives you joy.
It says, and a word spoken in due season, how good is it?
How good is it?
You know, you can give a really good answer with your mouth.
Again, similar to Proverbs 12 and 14, 12, 14.
But this verse helps us draw attention to another area
before we open our mouth.
Let's look at, let's look at again, verse number 23.
A man hath joy when he gives his two cents.
A man hath joy when he gives his unsolicited opinion.
No, it says a man has joy by the answer, answer.
What is an answer?
An answer is a response.
Someone has come to you and said,
look, can you give me some advice?
I've got a question for you.
Can you help me understand this or that?
Whatever it is in life.
Maybe a Bible passage, whatever it is.
Look, the answer, you wait for someone to ask you
for your advice, for your opinion, okay?
This is what's going to give you joy.
You just telling people what you think, you know,
with that invitation is not going to give you joy
is what I'm trying to tell you, okay?
Wait for the invitation.
Wait for someone to ask of you, okay?
You say, pastor, no one's asking of me.
That's because they don't see the wisdom in you yet.
All right?
People are going to ask you questions,
ask for your opinion when they feel, hey,
this person is wise and has something of value
that I can learn from.
But you've got to earn that trust first.
Or you can destroy the trust by just giving your opinions
all the time, your unsolicited advice
when no one's asked of you.
You see, how good is it?
What is good when you wait, you know,
and you give the answer in response to someone asking you?
And then it says, and a word spoken, induced season.
Induced season means at the appropriate time,
at the right time, all right, at the appropriate time.
You know, you're going to need to ask yourself these questions.
Am I the appropriate person to answer this question,
to say these words?
Is this the appropriate setting?
You know, is this a conversation that we should have one on one?
Is this a conversation that we ought to have in public?
Again, let me encourage you,
just if there's ever conflict with someone in church,
okay, someone offends one another,
someone sins against one another in this church,
the appropriate setting is one on one.
No one else needs to know about it.
You know what?
If I'm having an argument with Brother Matthew back there,
right, and we go and sort it out,
we go and talk about it,
and no one else in the church knows about it,
they have no idea, then it's been done right.
But when everybody knows, oh yeah, they're having an argument,
it's all been done wrong.
You know, it's not due season, these aren't good words.
It's just going to cause destruction.
I hope, not that I like conflicts,
but I hope there's been conflict in our church,
and that it's been sorted one on one with people,
and I don't even know about it.
You know, first thing when things happen in church,
call Pastor.
No, wrong.
Go to your brother who's offended you,
or the brother you offended.
Go and make peace.
Go and sort it out.
You say, Pastor, I don't know, maybe I did offend them,
maybe I didn't, I don't know.
Well, don't worry.
Don't wait to find out.
Just go and meet up with your brother and say,
look, I said some words, I don't know if they offended you,
but in case they did, look, I'm sorry,
I was a bit stupid when I said those words.
We know what the Bible says about our tongues.
Okay?
You know, I love you, I just want to edify you,
encourage you, motivate you.
You know, I was being sarcastic, I was joking,
but I know it was offensive,
and I shouldn't have said those words, I'm sorry.
And no one else needs to know about it.
But again, a word spoken in due season,
at the right time.
It's making you ask the question.
Before I just open my mouth and blurt things out,
am I the appropriate person?
Is this the appropriate setting?
Is this the right time?
Okay, it stops us from just causing destruction.
Can you come with me to Proverbs 15, are you there already,
verse number 28?
I like this one as well.
Verse number 28.
The heart of the righteous, that should be us, right?
We're going to have the heart of the righteous.
The heart of the righteous studieth to answer.
What does that mean?
You're not going to give an answer straight away.
You're going to go, you know what, I need to think about that.
I need to go and study that.
I need to think about that for a little while.
Can I come back to you next week with the answer?
Can you just give me some time to really meditate
and think about that, you know?
That is the heart of the righteous.
But, it says, the mouth of the wicked
poureth out evil things.
You can check whether your heart is righteous or wicked
by just how much this mouth speaks.
It just pours out, it just vomits all this wicked.
You always have an answer.
You never have to go back and study for the answer.
You always just know the answer.
That's a problem.
I feel like I know the Bible really well.
Sometimes people ask me things and I'm like, you know what,
I might be able to give you an answer now,
but I probably need to think about it a little bit.
You think I know every single verse, every single phrase,
every single sentence of the Bible.
In fact, sometimes the questions you've got on the Bible
are going to be questions we all have about the Bible,
because some things are more challenging than others.
And it's fine to say, you know what,
as a pastor I've just learned it's good.
You know what, I don't know.
This is what I think.
These are the possibilities.
But you know what, I don't know.
I think I lean toward this way.
We're not talking about the most important fundamental doctrine of the Bible
that you've got to lock in that are black and white.
It's about other things that come up in the Bible,
and you're just like, I'm not sure about that.
Why did that happen? Why was that said?
Why did God allow that in that situation or what?
Sometimes it's good to just go back and study and think about things.
You know, you don't need to give an immediate answer.
You know, if your heart is righteous,
it's going to cause you to think, to study, to meditate,
and come back with a good answer,
come back with the best answer,
you know, instead of just opening your mouth.
That is the way of the wicked.
You know, one thing that I learned about this studying to answer,
especially as a pastor,
is sometimes I don't need to go and study the answer,
but I need to study the question.
Sometimes people ask me a question,
and I need more information,
so I've got to learn how to ask more questions
to then understand exactly why you're asking that of me.
I'll just give you a very silly one,
and I've given you this example a few times in the past.
I don't get this question anymore,
but when I started the church, I got it all the time,
like week in, week out,
for like six months when I started this church.
I had people ring me up.
Pastor, is alcohol a sin?
What's the answer to that?
How would you answer that?
Someone rings you up.
Hey, I'm wondering, is alcohol a sin?
Now, my first response would be, yes.
But, it's also no.
And this is why you have to find out,
what are you talking about?
Why are you asking this question?
And sometimes people get offended
when you ask them questions about their question,
because it's kind of like they want you to trip over
and say something that they can use against you.
You see, alcohol as a product,
or as a chemical, is not a sin.
You've got alcohol in all your creams at home,
because alcohol is used,
so those chemicals in your creams or toothpaste or whatever,
it doesn't all just get hardened.
Now, ethanol is a good product to keep it fluid.
It's in your super glue.
It's in your toothpaste.
It's in so many products in your house,
but does that mean brushing your teeth is a sin?
You're going to get drunk on that?
Of course not.
So, alcohol as a chemical is not sinful.
It can be used for good things.
It can be used to put into your car
and save you some money with fuel,
ethanol fuel, E10, whatever.
It's probably not the best for your car,
but you know what I'm saying.
Is that sinful?
Does that feel sinful?
You know, if you use E10 petrol into your car,
is that sinful?
Of course not.
Okay, but is drinking alcohol a sin?
Well, yes.
But you see, I need to study the question,
not so much the answer.
I know the answer, but what are you talking about?
Why are you asking that?
What are your intentions?
What are you trying to prove?
And so, you know,
I hope this just gives you something to think about,
you know, when people ask you questions
or you're given an answer,
are you actually answering their question?
Are you actually answering their question?
And that's where you need to sort of think
and meditate, not just on the answer,
but many times on the question.
The Bible says in Proverbs 18,
come with me to Proverbs 18.
Proverbs 18, verse number 4.
The words of a man's mouth are as deep waters
and the wellspring of wisdom as a flowing brook.
I like that as well.
You know, I don't want to be the kind of pastor
that just has gone to Bible college
and never went to Bible college,
but there are too many pastors like this.
They go to a Bible college,
they learn what to say,
and then they get behind the pulpit
and they say what they learned to say.
But there's no depth.
It might be correct.
I'm not saying it's all incorrect.
What they're saying might be correct,
but you might go to that same pastor
and say, pastor, can you just prove that to me in the Bible?
You're rebellious. Just accept it.
I want the deep waters.
I just want to understand it a little bit deeper.
You need to be someone that when you open your mouth,
it's not just surface level things.
What you're saying might be surface level,
but you've had time.
Again, the study to answer,
you've utilised your time and experience over the years
to have something deeper than that.
So if someone asks more information
or to prove it further,
you can prove it from God's word,
or you can, whatever, by your experience,
whatever it is that you're speaking about.
There is a depth. It's deeper.
There's much more value when it comes to hearing that person speak.
When people see that you're well studied,
when people see that you've considered different positions
that might be contrary to yours
and you've got the answers to those issues
and why you stand on the position that you stand,
they're more likely to come to you and ask for your advice,
to ask for your knowledge.
But again, the words of a man's mouth are as deep waters.
They ought to be deep.
We're not just saying things for the sake of saying things.
We've studied God's word, again, as a pastor.
You've really considered you've got the experience to go with it.
There are many things that I teach in the Bible that I believe,
I believe it with all my heart and I'll teach it with all my heart,
but the reason I've come to that conclusion is not just because
I know what the Bible says,
but I've tested other positions that people hold,
other teachings that people hold,
and I've tried to test it with God's word and found the faults.
And so as I found the faults of these other things,
it strengthened the position that I do have.
Or there are times that I've had the wrong position.
I've seen something incorrectly
and I wasn't aware of the faults that I had built into my understanding.
And someone with more wisdom, someone that has studied it out,
I've heard them, I've asked them questions,
and I've tested it for myself and go,
you know what, my position was weak.
Your position is much more strong.
So you know what, I'm going to go that way.
There's nothing wrong with that.
Learning and growing, finding a deepness in the things of God
or in the wisdom and experience and guidance
that you can share with other people.
Proverbs 18 verse number 6.
A fool's lips enter into contention
and his mouth calleth for strokes.
Is this you?
When you speak, do you enter into contention?
Do you start arguments and fights and conflicts
and his mouth calleth for strokes?
When you actually want to cause other people to argue amongst themselves,
fight amongst themselves,
the Bible says you're a fool.
You're foolish. You're not wise if this is you.
If this is your mouth, you need to stop it.
I want you to be wise with your mouths.
You'll know if this is you or not.
I don't know if it's you. I don't know.
Because I don't know all your life. I don't know all your relationships.
Do you find yourself in constant battles
with your family, with your friends, with your colleagues,
with everybody, with your pastor?
You know, you need to examine yourself.
You know, the person that has the attitude,
oh, he stinks, she stinks, my wife stinks,
my boss stinks, my church stinks.
No, you stink is the issue.
If you're just in constant contention all the time,
you're the problem.
Wake up. You're the one that stinks.
Go have a shower. Clean yourself up.
And then repair the damage that you've caused.
You know, believe it or not, I've heard of a church
where people argue and had a fight
over whether Adam had a belly button or not.
Why would that happen?
I can give you reasons why he had one.
I can give you reasons why he did not have one.
And you know what? It's not important.
Who cares?
But do you believe me that there can be a church like this
or churches like this that will argue and fight
over something so stupid?
Because they're fools is what they are.
Contention, argument.
You're not exactly like me on the belly button
and then we can't even be friends.
Yeah, anyway, that's foolish.
That's foolish. Stupidity.
Who cares?
Why does it matter?
I mean, like the next person, I guess I do at one point
wonder, did he have one or not?
You know, there are questions that we're always going to have.
We're never going to have a full answer to it.
Again, this comes with the deepness and the study.
Sometimes it's good to just say,
let me think about this for a little bit for a while.
Let me see the pros and cons.
One way or another way.
At the end of the day, I'm not sure.
I don't think it's worth fighting about.
Who knows?
I'll ask Adam when I get there.
Okay, we'll find out with Adam.
Did you have one or not?
Come with me to Proverbs 18, verse number 8.
Proverbs 18, verse number 8.
You're not far from there.
It says, the words of a tale bearer are as wounds.
If you're a gossiper, you cause wounds
and they go down into the innermost parts of the belly.
You might say, oh, come on.
Yeah, I did gossip about you, but get over it.
No, they're wounds that go down all the way inside.
Internal damage.
It's not just a scratch on the surface
when you gossip about people.
It goes all the way inside.
Okay, think about internal bleeding.
You know, something like that, right?
Someone might get hit by a car.
You may not notice much on the outside,
but on the inside there might be damaged organs,
internal bleeding.
Okay, that's what gossip does.
You may think, whatever, I said these words, so what?
It causes great damage to people.
You know, you need to ask yourself the question,
should I be talking about someone to someone else?
And look, I've done it.
Just to be honest with you, I've done it, you know?
And sometimes I'm talking to someone about someone,
and I'm like, hold on, should I even be saying that?
Why is my mouth saying this?
How did we get into this conversation?
Gotta change topic, quick,
before I say something that I regret.
I'm not saying there's ever a wrong time
to talk about someone else.
But, you know, is it gossip?
Is it destructive?
You need to ask yourself these questions.
There's something else that damages churches.
Again, I've seen churches damaged out of gossip.
It's extremely damaging, okay?
Come with me to Proverbs 27, Proverbs 27, and verse number two.
Proverbs chapter 27, verse number two.
Proverbs 27, verse number two.
Let another man praise thee, and not thine own mouth.
A stranger, and not thine own lips.
Don't praise yourself.
It's ugly.
No one likes it.
Yeah, no one likes it.
Let someone else praise you.
You know what?
If you're living a righteous and godly life,
someone's gonna praise you.
Someone's gonna come up to you and say,
sister, brother, your encouragement to me.
Someone's gonna go to church and say,
you know, brother so-and-so over there.
You know, he's a real encouragement.
You know, he's a real blessing to me in my life.
You know, someone's gonna go to the Lord God in prayer
and say, Lord, thank you for New Life Baptist Church.
Thank you for brother so-and-so and sister so-and-so
that I can have at church
that really has helped me in difficult times,
that has been loving toward me.
Thank you, Lord, for giving me people
that have edified me in my life.
Let someone else praise you.
Don't praise yourself.
In fact, if you come with me to Proverbs chapter 30,
Proverbs chapter 30, verse number 32,
I'm near the end now, brethren.
Proverbs chapter 30, verse number 32.
Proverbs 30, 32, it says,
if thou has done foolishly in lifting up thyself,
say, when you praise you, what does the Bible say?
It's foolish.
If thou has done foolishly in lifting thyself up
or if thou has thought evil, I love this,
lay thine hand upon thy mouth.
That's a nice way of saying, shut up.
If you find yourself praising yourself
or speaking evil things, God says, do this.
If that's the only way to stop your mouth, do this.
That's better than praising yourself.
You might look like an idiot,
but you're going to look like more of an idiot
if you praise yourself or speak foolishly
or speak evil things.
So, and you say, why are these things in the Bible?
It's because we will naturally do these things.
We will naturally try to praise ourselves in the flesh, okay?
This is the way of man.
This is the way, you know, speaking highly of oneself.
Come with me to Proverbs 31.
Proverbs 31, last one.
Proverbs 31 verse number 8.
What else should we use our mouth for?
Proverbs 31 verse number 8.
It says, open thy mouth for the dumb.
The dumb are people that can't speak.
Open thy mouth for the dumb
in the cause of all such are appointed to destruction.
Open thy mouth, judge righteously
and plead the cause of the poor and needy.
You know, it's fine to come to the defense of other people.
You know, using your mouth.
Someone that is unable to take care of themselves.
Someone that is unable to speak.
You know, God wants us to be mindful of others.
Not only should we use our mouth to edify,
but we should use our mouth to protect.
Protect those that are weak.
Protect those that are suffering.
You know, that might be going through a hard time
of no fault of themselves.
They're innocent, but they just are unable to defend themselves.
You know, if we're in a position to pass judgment,
the Bible says there, judge righteously, okay?
Make sure that when you make a decision
about a certain situation, you know, you've assessed,
you know, who's right, who's wrong,
you know, what is fair in this situation.
Use your mouth, you know, to protect others
that can't protect themselves.
You know, my little children, they can't protect themselves
if only they're attacked.
Mum and dad will have to come and speak up for them many times.
But what we want to do is we want to teach our children
of how to use their own mouths to be protective of themselves.
Okay, mums and dads aren't always going to be there.
You know, we want our children to learn how to utilise their mouths.
You know, not for destruction, but for positive purposes.
So, brethren, the title for the sermon today was
Be Wise With Your Words.
Again, this was just a self-reflection for myself,
thinking about how well do I do as a pastor.
I don't know, right?
Proverbs 10 to 21, the lips of the righteous feed many.
That's what I want to do.
And the only way that I can feed many is to be righteous myself.
You know, yes, I have the righteousness of Christ.
I'm saved, but I need to walk in His righteousness.
I need to do what is right.
I need to love His word. I need to love God's people.
And I realise this is so important for me as a pastor,
but it's important for you too.
Because you have a mouth. You talk to people.
You talk to brothers and sisters in the Lord.
You can cause destruction.
You know, and we need to be wise.
Because it is so easy, it is so natural to be foolish.
So be wise with your words.
Alright, let's pray.
Heavenly Father, Lord, I just want to thank you for your creation.
Lord, thank you for giving us the ability to see and to hear and to smell and to touch.
And Lord, you've also given us the ability to speak.
Lord, it's something you've given us and not the animal kingdom.
Lord, with that we can actually open our mouth and speak unto you.
And Lord, the same fear, the same concerns that we ought to have when we speak unto you.
Lord, help us to be able to control our mouth and be able to speak to our brothers and sisters in love.
Lord, we want our mouths to be used for productive methods, for positive things, for edifying and uplifting situations.
And Lord, this mouth just has a mind of its own many times.
This tongue can be so destructive.
Lord, even when we don't intend to be destructive with our tongues, sometimes it can be so.
So God, I just pray you'd guide us.
Lord, teach us how to tame this mouth.
And Lord, please help us to be wise and not foolish.
We pray these things in Jesus' name. Amen.
Alright, let's go to hymn number 332, please.
332. We'll finish up with channels only.
332. Channels only.
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