okay we're in Philippians chapter number two the title of the sermon this evening
is how to be diplomatic in church how to be diplomatic in church and you're gonna
have to try extra hard to pay attention tonight because it's not necessarily a
bombastic sermon this is more of a sermon giving you instruction admonitions
just making sure that we understand how to behave ourselves in church and look
at Philippians chapter 2 if you would in verse number one it says if there be
and therefore any consolation in Christ if any comfort of love of any fellowship
of the Spirit if any bows and mercies fulfill ye my joy that you be
like-minded having the same love being of one accord of one mind let nothing be
done through strife or vainglory but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other
better than themselves look not every man on his own things but every man
also on the things of others and so right here in Philippians chapter 2 the
Apostle Paul is instructing the church at Philippi and he's telling them make
sure that whatever it is that you do in the church and the congregation make sure
it's not out of strife because you want to fight you want you want that
contention you want that strife because of vainglory in fact you need to make
sure that you're humble and at the end of the day that this is the attitude
that we as Christians should have when we come to church is that we are humble
we're not trying to be prideful or arrogant we should seek to have a humble
spirit a lowly mind and one of the main indicators that someone is lowly in mind
is that they esteem others better than themselves it says there in verse 3 let
nothing be done through strife or vainglory but in lowliness of mind let
each esteem other better than themselves he says in verse number four thank you
brother Morrie look not every man on his own things but every man also on the
things of others in other words put others first right this is what this is
basically telling us so in other words you know when we come to the Church of
God we come to meet together our attitude should be how can I be a
blessing to others what can I do to be an asset to my church what can I do to
be more Christlike and have the mind of Christ when I come to church and again
what I'm preaching on this evening is how to be diplomatic in church and what
I mean by diplomatic is this how to have tact in church okay and let me just say
this is that you know when you think about the world the world would look at
something like a church like ours and say those fools are crazy like we're
crazy we're radical we're out of our minds we're just these religious zealots
which I like that title but you know we're just these we're a cult but let's
just be honest they're crazy everything that they do out there all the nonsense
that they believe all the things that they do that's actually crazy when you
compare it to the Word of God and what the Bible actually says we can assert
that basically you know the world has gone insane right but here's the thing
is that we should seek to live in such a way that we're exercising biblical
principles but not at the expense of just being a bad testimony to this world
right now if they say well yeah you are a bad testimony because there are
certain people of the population that you hate well then so be it you know I
mean if that's your opinion of us we're not gonna back down on that that's never
gonna change we're never gonna change our doctrine to please the world you
understand you know we obviously want to be a blessing to this world by giving
them the gospel getting them safe fixing their lives but you know there's a line
we will not cross which is the doctrinal line okay but it's important that when
we come here that we learn how to listen to this how to be normal we need to
learn how to be normal because in one way or another all of us have come from
that stupid world where we've learned dumb things dumb conduct foolish ways of
behavior and so you know the the house of God is a place to normalize you to
stabilize you to bring buoyancy to your life to help you to be a functioning
member of society because you've learned biblical Christian principles you
understand and so I want to preach on this tonight and I'm gonna go over a
couple verses and I'm gonna just give you some random points okay and you do
well to take these down all right you say well pastor you know I'm normal
well there's a reason I'm preaching this okay you know you may be normal but you
know you can be a little more normal too okay and there might be something on
this list you can adhere to listen to and it'll help you in the future and so
this is important go with me if you want to Ephesians chapter number four Ephesians
chapter number four if you wouldn't let us be lowly in mind is steaming others
better than ourselves look at Ephesians chapter 4 and verse number 1 it says I
therefore the prisoner of the Lord beseech you the walk worthy of the
vocation wherewith ye are called with all lowliness and meekness with long
suffering look what it says here forbearing one another in love what does
it mean to forbear it's kind of like put up with one another put up with one
another in love be patient towards people be long-suffering don't just be
this unmerciful individual where everyone has to be at your exact
standard and they need to meet your qualifications and all these things you
know we need to make sure that we are patient with people in their spiritual
growth he says in verse number three endeavoring to keep the unity of the
spirit in the bond of peace so when the Bible says endeavoring this means that
this is a lifelong process we have to just keep trying and keep trying to keep
unity keep trying to be patient keep trying to be long-suffering keep trying
to love one another it needs to be a lifelong commitment of seeking to keep
unity in our church you understand go with me if you go to 1st Thessalonians
chapter number 2 1st Thessalonians chapter 2 and one of the best ways to
describe this according to the Bible is simply this be gentle one toward
another right what does it mean to be gentle means you're being delicate with
one another okay you're not being too abrasive with people you're not being
too you know just kind of hard on people you are gentle with people I
don't know that sounds kind of soft well you got a problem then because
gentleness is the fruit of the Spirit Bible says in Galatians 5 22 but the
fruit of the Spirit is love joy peace long-suffering listen to this gentleness
goodness faith meekness temperance against such there is no law so one of
the things that the Spirit produces in us is to be delicate with people to
handle people gently making sure that we don't hurt them that we don't just go
out of our way to offend them that we don't just kind of be abrasive and just
destroy someone we need to be gentle with the brethren okay look at 1st
Thessalonians 2 verse number 5 this not only applies to the to our church to
brothers and sisters in Christ but believe it or not this applies to the
unsaved as well when we go out and preach the gospel we should be gentle
with people we're speaking to right and in fact look at verse number five it
says for neither at any time usually flattering words as you know nor cloak
of covetousness God is witness nor of men sought we glory neither of you nor
yet of others when we might have been burdensome as the apostles of Christ
look what it says but we were what gentle among you well how gentle well
even as a nurse cherishes her children the Bible says so you think about a mom
who is cherishing her infant her baby you know they are very gentle they treat
that baby with with you know delicate hands because the baby is very sensitive
they're fragile well he's saying here we were gentle among you we were like a
nurse who was cherishing her child we were delicate he says so being
affectionately desires of you we were willing to have him pardon unto you not
the gospel of God only but also our own souls because you were dear unto us so
what does this tell us this does is when we go out and preach the gospel we need
to make sure we're not so abrasive with people okay and even if they reject our
message and they don't want to get saved and maybe they're a little rude to you
allow yourself to be defrauded and be gentle with them anyways okay you know
be a person who is patient and kind with people don't lose your temper don't lose
your cool be a person who has self-control right turn with me if you
would to 2nd Timothy chapter number 2 2nd Timothy chapter 2 I'm gonna reach
you from Titus you're in 2nd Timothy chapter number 2 actually I'm gonna wait
on that we're gonna go to Titus after that look at 2nd Timothy 2 verse 22 it
says flee also youthful lust but follow righteousness faith charity peace with
them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart but foolish and unlearned
questions avoid knowing that they do gender strife now what is it what is a
foolish question what's the modern term for that a stupid question you know
you're out there preaching the gospel and they're like do you believe in the
flat earth you know what do you think about the flat earth they just say
that's a stupid question so what are we supposed to do we supposed to avoid it
and why because you know inwardly we just want to say you're an idiot if you
believe in the flat earth okay they do gender strife right and then he says in
verse 24 and the servant of the Lord must not strive but be gentle unto all
men apt to teach patient in meekness instructing those that oppose themselves
if God provincial will give them repentance to the acknowledging of the
truth and you know I don't know if it's the case here it might be there might
have been some there might be some ex flat earthers in our church there might
be I hope there's no present flat earthers in our church though for sure
but there might be some ex flat earthers and you know someone was gentle with you
brought you along and didn't necessarily just bite your head off when they find
out you're a flat earther or something and then you got right with God and you
stop being a flat earther and you accept the globe okay there being a ball but
here it says that we need to make sure that we don't strive that we're gentle
with all men okay we need to make sure that we are gentle that we're kind to
people when we're out soul winning there and by the way one thing that helps with
that is genuinely loving the people you're speaking to because if when you
really love the people you're talking to you're not gonna be abrasive for them I
mean think about this if that person you're speaking to was your lost loved
one if it was someone in your family you would be very gentle because you know
that their soul hangs in the balance and you don't want to say something that can
cause them to be closed to the gospel well that's how we should see people
when we go out there even if we don't know them this is important go to Titus
chapter 3 we're just going through some verses here on this matter of gentleness
Titus 3 verse 1 says put them in mind to be subject to principalities and powers
to obey magistrates and to be ready to every good work to speak evil of no man
to not be brought to be no brawler excuse me but gentle showing all meekness
unto all men why why do I have to be gentle with people they believe so many
stupid things can't they just understand what I'm trying to teach them we'll go
to says in verse 3 for we ourselves also were sometimes foolish hey let me
give you let me give you a reminder here there's one time there's a time when you
might have been a little stupid yourself so before you start getting on people
because they don't believe exactly like you just remember there's a time when
you didn't have that truth either there is a time when you are sometimes foolish
he says they're disobedient deceived serving diverse loves and pleasures
living in malice and envy hateful hating one hating one another he's saying
there's a time when you were just a hateful person but after that the
kindness and love of our God and our Savior toward man appeared not by works
of righteousness which we have done but according to his mercy he saved us
basically saying after you got saved you came to the knowledge of the truth you
understood these things and and so God was merciful to you he was kind to you
he was gracious to you he was gentle with you and let's just be honest before
salvation any sin that we have we may have committed God could easily struck
us down dead sent us to hell and he would have been justified for doing so
but he didn't why cuz he was gentle with us okay go to James chapter 3 James
chapter number 3 I'm gonna reach you from Colossians 3 verse 8 says but now
ye also put off all these anger wrath malice blasphemy filthy communication
out of your mouth lie not one to another seeing that ye have put off the old man
with his deeds and I put on the new man which is renewed in knowledge after the
image of him that created him he says in verse 12 put on therefore as the
elect of God holy and beloved bowels of mercies kindness humbleness of mind
meekness longsuffering forbearing one another and forgiving one another if any
man have a core against any even as Christ forgave you so also do ye listen
to this and above all these things put on charity which is the bond of
perfectness and let the peace of God rule in your hearts through the which
also you're called in one body and be thankful look at James 3 and verse 13
who is a wise man and a dude with the knowledge among you let him show out of
a good conversation his works with meekness of wisdom now this is important
he says if you have true knowledge heavenly knowledge it should not come
forth as abrasive mean-spirited or kind of like just angry towards a person it
says here let him show out of a good conversation his works with meekness of
wisdom you're like well hold on a second pastor I seen you being a little
mean-spirited behind the pulpit well yeah of course because I'm preaching but
you know what when we deal with people face-to-face we're not preaching and
here's something that a lot of young people don't seem to understand is that
they think the way we behave here should be exactly the way we behave over here
you know when I'm preaching the Word of God I have to let loose because God
commanded me to do so he told me to reprove and rebuke and
exhort with all long-suffering and doctrine he told me to lift up my voice
like a trumpet cry aloud and spare not and show my people their transgressions
yes I'm supposed to be mean-spirited and angry but you know what after the
sermon is done we need to deal with people face-to-face and we're not
preaching to people on the individual basis you understand you know it's
important that we understand that we show out of a good conversation our
works with meekness of wisdom it says in verse 14 but if you have bitter envying
and strife in your hearts glory not lie not against the truth this wisdom
descendants not from above but it's earthly sensual devilish for where
envying and strife is there is confusion and every evil work but the wisdom that
is from above is first pure then peaceable gentle and easy to being
treated full of mercy and good fruits without partiality without hypocrisy the
Bible says now turn with me if you would to 1st Timothy actually you know what go
to let's see here go to Titus chapter 2 Titus chapter number 2 so how can we be
diplomatic in church how can we have tact in church okay and the reason I
think this is important is because of the fact that you know we want to make
sure that when people come to our church they visit our church they attend our
church that you know they're not just right off the bat just offended or
something right let me just go ahead and just say it they're not just offended
they want we want them to come to our church and like our church and say man
this is a friendly church it's a kind church and they believe right on a lot
of things and so I like this church but you know what we can easily and by the
way I mean I preached a sermon a while back called adorning the doctrines of
Christ right and how we need to make sure that we adorn the doctrines of
Christ with meekness with wisdom with gentleness so let me give you just a
couple random points on how to be diplomatic in church and please give
heed to this okay take this serious and I know you want to probably hear a
really doctrinal sermon on end times or something but this is very much needed
okay number one treat church members with respect right treat church members
with respect men be appropriate around women and children with how you talk
with how you behave okay the Bible says in 1st Timothy 5 1 rebuke not an elder
but entreat them as a father and the younger men as brethren the elder woman
as mothers the younger sisters with all purity and let me just say this I'm not
Bruce okay I'm not bro I'm not Bruce I'm pastor okay and by the way I don't have
a problem you call me past or brother Mejia okay but you know we need to make
sure we keep a level of respect and I would even go as far as to say this men
you should respond to the ladies in our church with ma'am yes ma'am no ma'am okay
and men likewise or ladies likewise with sir I mean we should say sir and ma'am to
everyone in our church why because we just need to be respectful and
appropriate around all the people in our church okay now obviously we understand
that there's groups in our church that are they're just like brethren you know
what I mean by that I mean they're like they're like brothers brothers fight
they argue they whine you know they just they constantly go at it I find nothing
wrong with that I think that's great when I see two guys just kind of arguing
together I know they don't hate each other or anything they're just kind of
acting like brothers and then that's fine but what I'm saying is we need to
make sure that we keep in mind that we need to treat church members with respect
you know don't men should not be so comfortable around the ladies they just
disrespect them and say inappropriate things around them and vice versa okay
ladies don't ever step your boundaries with men look at Titus 2 verse 3 the age
of women likewise that they be in behaviors become with holiness not false
accusers not given to much wine teachers of good things and this is age of women
but this applies to all women right it's not just like hey just the older ladies
make sure you obey this no this is for all the ladies okay that make sure they
their behavior is holy they're not accusing people they're not giving too
much wine their teachers of good things etc not only that but practice self
awareness so how do you how can we treat our church members with respect what by
just being self-aware self-aware the things you talk about you know and
here's one thing you know don't always bring up your pet doctrine right you
should not be a person who's just characterized by one particular doctrine
or one particular topic one particular subject okay be self-aware of yourself
you know the Bible says of David that he behaved himself wisely in all his ways
and the Lord was with him okay another one develop social skills this is a
perfect place to do it to develop social skills right what I mean by that
learn to shake hands I know that's real basic but learn to shake hands learn to
look people in the eyes you shouldn't have wandering eyes when a man comes to
you and shakes your hand like oh hey what's going on you should be able to
shake someone's hand look them straight in the eyes that's a respectable thing
to do learn how to greet people okay don't ignore people in our church when
people are in our church like oh that person always comes to our church well
okay then shouldn't you greet them even more then right don't just like leave
people look I'm all I'm all for coming to church here in doctrine everything
but you know we're a family here too you know and you when you see someone go and
shake their hand ask them how they're doing men go shake the ladies hands and
ask them how they're doing there's nothing inappropriate about that I mean
it's okay to go and in an appropriate way just go say and say Sarah how you
doing I'm doing great how's your week it's going great you know what were you
up to I don't know that's kind of weird or something why would that be weird
that's weird to like other churches who are just kind of paranoid we could be
appropriate folks right there's nothing wrong with the opposite gender greeting
one another right okay so develop social skills learn how to
conversate one with another okay and that would that would require for you to
have something to talk about okay learn how to conversate and but and and I
truly mean it this is a perfect place to do it because it's church and so people
will be kind to you they'll be long-suffering so you can kind of fumble
around and mess around and can't really like you know figure out how to talk and
then people will be patient with you okay this is exciting this is good
doctrine okay here's a good one in a perfect world everyone in our church
would just like each other 100% you guys you know where I'm going with this but
we don't live in a perfect world and so you know in a church like ours our size
there's gonna be beef sometimes some people are just not gonna like some
people if you don't like someone in our church you have a few options you can
you go find a new church or you can go get go go get it right with that person
or here's the thing you could just keep it to yourself just keep it to yourself
now let me explain something okay there's a command in the Bible to not
hate your brother right I would tell us not to hate our brother now why does the
Bible command Christians not to hate their brother well because it's possible
for a brother to hate their brother right I mean I know that that's your
deep doctrine for the night is it right no and if you hate your brother you're
not right with God now I will say this I cannot throw you out for for hating your
brother in your heart because I can't police your heart I can't excommunicate
you for some sin in your heart understand if you come to me and you say
I hate brother Maury you know I hate him and I just can't stand him you know this
is actually what I will tell you okay first of all I try to talk you off the
ledge to not hate him so why do you hate him like what's the problem but if it
just gets to a point where you're just like I get what you're saying pastor but
I still just don't like him I hate him this is literally what I'll tell you
okay I'll tell you this well you have every right to hate this person if you
want in your heart and still remain in our church but here's the policy at
first works Baptist Church you're not allowed to recruit people to hate him
with you you're not allowed to talk about it you have to be diplomatic in
church okay in other words if you hate Maury okay then just avoid Maury and
don't recruit people don't gossip about him don't go around telling people why
you hate him and why you don't like him why can't get along with them and try to
recruit people to your little campaign anti Maury campaign you have to be
diplomatic and I'm not look I'm not saying you have to go and shake his hand
and and and and try to like them if you just like I don't like them that's fine
but you need to keep it to yourself you have to be diplomatic in church about it
okay and not go around and say you know someone mentions Maury you're just like
oh yeah Maury is everything all right no that's fine and then like you tell
them and then when it comes to me they're like well they made me tell them
like I have to tell them or something you have to be diplomatic about it in
church okay because I cannot in my opinion biblically throw you out for
hating someone in our church unless it begins to flesh itself out you're
recruiting people to hate him you're doing malicious things you can turn that
off brother Glenn I see the ladies are just shivering it feels great though I
love how it feels in here okay but I'll be kind and gentle and so if you don't
like someone in our church just keep it to yourself okay because you you one
thing that I can require of you is to respect the church members and if you
decide to not respect them and to do those things then at that point I can
have grounds to throw you out of our church okay but again I can't police
what's going on in your heart because that's not my job I can tell you you're
not right with God I can tell you this is a sin and I can tell you it's gonna
be detrimental to your spiritual health it's bad it's wrong you need to forgive
your brother and and if you tell me like well I still think I'm right with God I
tell well you can think that but the Bible says that you're not right with
God because no one should ever hate their brother in their heart it's wrong
okay and so respect church members respect and let me say this you better
respect the church members of other churches as well and respect the
pastors of other churches as well okay and I'll just throw it out there you
know if you come to me you know bad-mouthing a righteous man who is in
good standings with us as a church you will get excommunicated from the church
because I'm not gonna tolerate that now if you come talking to me about some
bozo pastor you know I'll probably join ya okay but men who are in right
standings with our church men who are righteous men you have no right to
criticize them and if that happens then those are grounds to excommunicate you
from our church okay so this rule that rule applies now into our church members
and to myself but even to other church members and you know their pastors as
well number two those are all sub points in the number one how to be
diplomatic in church welcome visitors you should welcome visitors shouldn't
our desire to be to reach the world right we want people to get say we want
people to come to our church we want people to get plugged in to get
assimilated to our church to believe the Bible to go sowing we want those things
okay welcome visitors don't interrogate them okay let me give you some sub
points reevaluate your default settings isn't what a default setting is okay
I'll give you an example you know we started this this radio station on our
channel okay on Fridays and it's been going really good and we're doing it
every Friday and Lord willing we're gonna be streaming like 24 hours a day
we're building up our library you know and but we're using a company in this
company basically you can schedule all your stuff and it puts it out there but
what happens is if you're on air and you don't have any music playing there's a
default playlist that it'll play for you now luckily it's the playlist that you
put there understand and so it'll automatically play that because that's
the default setting unless you decide to change the schedule so make sense to
everyone okay so we need to have a default setting you understand what I'm
saying in other words you know when church members come or when visitors
come excuse me our default setting should be man this is great
hi how are you what's your name you know ask them about their salvation
testimony so not safe try to get them safe if they're already safe have you
been baptized be kind to them love them just be a good testimony to them okay
that should be your default setting now you say yeah but what if they're like a
rebel raid or something well unless the schedule changes on the playlist keep it
at the default setting and don't worry God will tell you I want this scheduled
on the playlist and then the default setting goes out the window but until
then keep it at the default setting what's the default setting love the
people that come to our church even listen to this even if they don't look
exactly like you let me just go a little further even if they look a little soft
let me go a little further even if they look a little effeminate let me go just
a tad further even if they're like a girly man how many of you would agree
that a lot of the styles today you know have men who are not homos look like
homos a little bit right it's sinful it's wicked but it's the world in which
we live in right now okay and so and I'm getting ahead of myself so reevaluate
your default settings make sure that your default setting is that everyone is
innocent until proven guilty okay and let me give you this point this is a
great point I like this point give me a minute give me a second realize there is
a difference between being vigilant and being paranoid realize there's a
difference between being vigilant and being paranoid vigilant is you know what
I'm walking with God I'm in the spirit paranoid is like every Tom Dick and
Harry that comes to our church it's potentially a reprobate there might be a
false prophet they might be this that you paranoid you're being paranoid no
I'm being vigilant no you're being paranoid vigilant means you're walking
in the spirit vigilant means you're filled with the spirit vigilant means
you are you know you're not quenching the spirit you are read up on your Bible
the fruit of the Spirit is in you and you're exerting those things paranoid is
just like you think the devil's just about to come tonight you need to put a
difference between the two maturity says that you replace paranoia with vigilance
and you can't have both you can't have both welcome visitors if a person is
involved in sin so let's talk about visitors okay a brand new person walks
through our door you start talking to them and they just kind of they just
kind of give you the lowdown about their life if a person is involved in sin
believes heresies don't panic don't get worked up don't lose your cool okay so
if someone is involved in sin let's say someone's someone's a drunkard they're
like what would you do this weekend oh man I killed an entire bottle of whiskey
with my buddies I'm still kind of you know feeling the you know don't be and
then you're just like freaking out or something hey what if they believe
heresy what if they believe you have to repent of your sins to be saved is that
a bad belief yeah of course but don't panic I'm so glad we don't have like a
red button in this church where it's like if someone goes wrong they're just
like if someone believes heresy don't panic it's okay you look what do you
mean it's okay they believe a false doctrine well they came to the right
church to correct them on that doctrine dude they're on our turf this is our
gang they're on our side what if they start spreading it do you really think
what do you take us for just think about that next time the next time you want to
panic is someone believes a false doctrine just remember what do I take my
church for you think we're all just a bunch of idiots in here no yeah well
maybe you're right about that you know it's not gonna happen folks this is why
we constantly teach doctrine in our church so we can walk around with
confidence knowing and by the way I think it's great that like you can pick
up on when someone believes false doctrine you know and here's the thing
is that interrogating someone or freaking out if someone believes a false
doctrine is a knee-jerk reaction because all of us to a certain extent
came from a church where some heretic came to the church and no one batted an
eye on it they didn't care they just let them come let the false prophets come
let the faggots come and nothing was done about it and that's frustrating I
knew a guy at one church that was anti King James Bible he was for the NIV and
he vehemently went to every person in the church trying to get them off the
King James Bible he even came to me it was just like you know the King James
Bible is wrong and I was like I'm King James only and you're a wolf in sheep's
clothing and I never want to see you again now he's staying in church but he
stayed away from me and I was so mad that this person was just allowed to
come and attend the church obviously that's that's the knee-jerk reaction
that we have because we've experienced things like that right we experienced
tolerance towards people like that I'm not telling you to tolerate it I'm
saying don't panic I'm saying chill out I'm saying don't be scared don't be
scared don't get worked up don't lose your cool what do I do make a mental
note and let me or my staff know I was like okay or you could just like correct
them but you know actually the Bible doesn't teach that can I show you real
quick by the way don't say oh man that is wicked we need to have tacked and be
gentle because you know what maybe they're not a false prophet maybe they
were taught false doctrine by a false prophet and so what you do is like let
me show you from the Bible you know I used to believe something similar like
that right this is not a good way to tell like I simply actually something
similar let me show you real quick let me show you something okay and then
just show them you know and then by the way if they choose not to change what
they believe then that's on them that's on them right if they're just like oh
I'm gonna continue to believe this like all right well it's wrong though but you
know that's what the Bible says you know it's like well what should I do then are
we gonna kick them out not really because they're probably not gonna come
back because you know you know they're gonna have like five more people ask
them about their salvation because that's the kind of culture we have we
check on people's salvation right if they're involved in sin don't don't
freak out if they're involved in fornication don't freak out if they are
involved in a sin worthy of excommunication do not freak out and
you're like thinking well we're not supposed to be fellowshipping with them
yeah but they don't know that that's a sin worthy of excommunication the Bible
specifically says and again I don't want to get ahead of myself the people we
should not be fellowshipping with our brothers who are involved in this sin
who are unrepentant of that sin right that's who we need not to fellowship
with okay does that make sense to everyone talk about being diplomatic in
church okay and look you're safe here this is our safe space if someone comes
you don't freak out you know what I mean you have the upper hand you have you
have the advantage as obi-wan Kenobi one said you have the high ground I wake
people up here if you don't get that don't worry about it you're like I'm
gonna go home and watch the whole trilogy now and I already mentioned this
but remember that Church discipline is only instituted towards the unrepentant
keep that in mind it's only towards the unrepentant okay so we could possibly
have someone in our church who's been smoking weed for like the last five
weeks or something it's a possibility okay and if I find out they're smoking
weed then obviously I have to go approach them and tell them hey you
can't come back until you stop smoking weed stop smoking pot but here's the
thing it's like oh man you should have kicked them out like five weeks ago it's
like well here's the thing though if he didn't know that and I didn't know that
we can't read people's minds we don't know what's going on with them right
okay and so Church discipline is only instituted towards the unrepentant and
then keep this in mind remember that we are here to normalize people so be
normal because we're here to make people normal you understand we want people to
come and be like these are some normal people not like you know you know what's
going on man what's up where you from man what churches you go to and let me
just make this announcement okay don't call anybody a homosexual who's a
visitor to our church if they look like a softy okay and we all know what we're
talking about the the the the culprit of this does not mind me saying this right
Glenn you're cool with that he knows you guys think I'm rough with Glenn but
Glenn knows I love him and I love Glenn and he's an awesome church member okay
but he's not the only one there's many others okay who can be guilty of such a
thing okay don't just assume like if someone comes maybe they got an earring
it's just like I got one question for you are you 100% sure that you're not a
homosexual like don't let your gospel presentation start off like that and you
know what we could probably go back a couple years on your Facebook or
Instagram and look at and look see how you looked and you know what if that 10
year if that person 10 years ago came to our church today maybe we would think
the same thing right can I get an amen can I get a witness no don't don't give
me the witness that would be really bad but you know what I mean right this is
family time folks and so you know we're here to normalize people and give people
the benefit of the doubt normalize them help them to learn right doctrine I'm
trying to teach us how to be diplomatic in church okay and here's the thing you
know when we first started the church you know obviously Garrett Kershway was
here with us and he helped started the church or whatever and that guy ended up
being a damnable heretic or whatever but when we first started the church he's
the one who kind of planted a seed their reparates were just gonna show I remember
we were there in the building and the Omani building by the way he was about
four years too late but he was kind of right because it was filled with
reparates after a while you know the protest but he was saying he would say
oh yeah the first day you guys are gonna have a bunch of reparates here bunch of
reparates and I remember there's a guy with me he's like are you serious he's
like oh yeah you have a bunch of it and I'm like I'm thinking like you're
scaring this guy like he shouldn't say these things because he's gonna scare
him you know but you know what he it's like what kind of leadership is that oh
yeah there's gonna be so many reparates here they're just oozing out the windows
and just coming through the doors they're like they're like the the the
Joel chapter 2 just coming in through the windows and everything just but he
was wrong he's an idiot right he was paranoid it's paranoid you know we need
to be normal not be paranoid be vigilant and if someone comes up and look I'm not
saying put your red flags away you understand what I'm saying I'm just
trying to retire all these red flags no keep the red flags but but you know the
sensitivity needs to be turned down a little bit we have this camera inside
the inside of brother releases his office and the sensitivities to like
it's it's too much a moth would go by and it notifies him like someone's at
the building and when he looks it's just like a moth's wing or something it like
notifies them when any little movement comes in it's just like the sensitivity
on that camera is a little too high so we need to turn down the sensitivity on
the reprobates and the false prophets okay turn it down just a little bit okay
amen all right assume the best in everyone give people the benefit of the
doubt don't police people it's not your job to expose heretics and reprobates
you know the Bible actually says to let the tears in the week grow together
isn't that interesting in other words just keep serving God and God has
already laid that laid out boundaries and principles for the leader to do
something when someone is exposed when a false prophet manifests their folly when
things come up it's my job to obviously lay down the hammer and make heads roll
obviously right but it's not your job to police them now don't go so extreme where
it's just like you hear about things you just don't say anything at all just make
sure you have the appropriate default setting on your vigilance okay next one
how to be diplomatic in church restore the repentant what I'm referring to is
those who have been excommunicated and let me just say this the only people we
will restore our repentant believers we will never restore heretics never we
will never restore damnable heretics false prophets and facts it's not gonna
happen okay the ones we will restore are those who are involved in sin first
Corinthians 5 Matthew 18 type sin you know if they're involved in those things
and they come back and they say I was wrong I've repented of that I want to
come back they're welcome to come back with open arms okay and learn how to
talk to people when they do repent okay oh man did you stop drinking oh man
welcome back so this means you and her not together anymore it's just like so
you moved out then it's like you know just keep in mind if they're there and
you see me kind of talking to them it probably means that we've already
restored them and you said why not like talk about things like that well because
we want them to like just kind of move on we don't want to rub things like that
in their face okay we want to let them move on and and move on with their lives
and get right with God etc okay but they have to be repentant in other words they
have to like repent that's right they have to stop doing what they were doing
they got them kicked out okay go to Revelation chapter 2 if you would
revelation chapter 2 how do we deal with people who are involved in sin you know
someone who is involved in fornication someone who is involved in drunkenness
someone who is involved in these sins that merit excommunication how do we
deal with them because I think I think sometimes even in our church people
still get a little mixed up on how to deal with situations like that they
think that right off the bat they're excommunicated they're just thrown out
right off the bat but it doesn't necessarily work like that okay and and
here's the thing is you know our enemies think that we're just on this trigger
happy mode to just kick people out of our church I'm not and I don't think any
of my friends are I think we want to keep people in church we want people to
live righteously to love the Lord and and give them the benefit of the doubt
you know and sometimes I think I think sometimes church members can have that
same attitude where it's just like man we're just gonna kick these people out
but that shouldn't necessarily be the goal the goal should be restoration
right the goal should be that they would repent and look at Revelation chapter 2
oh we'll read this in just a bit okay so let's say for example let me give you
some examples let me give you some parables actually because these aren't
real people that I'm gonna talk about let's say someone is just a drunkard
okay drunkenness is merits excommunication for sure okay and here's
the policy that I have as the pastor of this church is that if you're drinking
to any degree you're gonna get thrown out or you can potentially get thrown
out if you casually drink you know you have a beer with your burger every once
in a while that still can merit excommunication if you see nothing wrong
with that that can get you excommunicated from the church well
that's not I'm not drinking every day okay so do you think it would be right
to like fornicate every once in a while or something let's apply that to the
other ones right but let me explain something if there's a person who's
struggling with alcohol okay and they repent and they're just like I'm
struggling I'm trying my best you know I will not excommunicate them now if it
goes to an extreme where they've repented but they just can't stop then I
will tell them they need to go into a rehabilitation center until they can
clean up their life and then they're welcome to come back okay and that's not
even I wouldn't even consider that excommunication because at that point
there's no punishment that should be instituted upon a person who's
struggling with that sin it's just a higher level of addiction that requires
a little more help from some institution that can help them to get rehabilitated
you understand and so you know if a person is involved in drinking and you
heard about it and I go tell them and they're just they get it right well then
they can still remain in church okay now obviously if someone is involved in
fornication for example if they're involved in fornication you know
obviously they have a couple choices they could either get married they can
separate or they can leave our church okay but look what it says in verse 19
it says I know thy works in charity service and faith and thy patience and
thy works in the last to be more than the first notwithstanding I have a few
things against it because thou sufferest that woman Jezebel which callest
herself a prophetess to teach and to seduce my servants to commit fornication
and to eat things sacrificed into idols look what it says in verse 21 and I gave
her what space to repent of her fornication and she repented not so I
want you to notice that Jesus actually gave her time to repent I gave you space
to repent what does that mean from the time that they knew it was wrong there
was some sort of limit there's a window of time that God gave them to get right
in other words he didn't lay the hammer down right away and there's actually no
indication than any of these churches that the candlestick was removed from
any of these churches why because God was merciful to them and he gave them
space to repent okay now you say well how much space is that why I think God
just leaves it at our discretion as pastors like oh man you're gonna take
that upon yourself you well you know I think God places pastors in the position
that they have because a pastor genuinely loves his people it's not on
a trigger happy campaign to kick people out of church and therefore with the
right heart will create some sort of a lot of time where they can repent of
that sin and get right with God okay and let me say this let me go back to
reasons for getting thrown out not just like drunkenness fornication idolatry
but even railing people could be restored from railing as well if they're
willing to get it right if they're willing to apologize and get it right
and and and you know get that relationship right they can be restored
okay it can't happen but they have to get it right and so what I'm saying here
that the the point that I'm trying to emphasize here is the space to repent
okay so if you find someone and you know someone comes to our church and they're
involved in these sins or something like that you know you don't have to separate
them right away you don't have to like unclean unclean and you know you
basically view them as okay they just need to learn and here's the thing like
sometimes this doesn't happen very often but maybe someone is involved in a
particular sin that according to the Bible would merit excommunication I'll
let them be in church for a while until they hear sermon that I preach about
that particular sin because the space to repent my policy is the space that
repent is from the time that they came to our church until the time that they
know that it's wrong that's the space because look I don't go to people in our
church visitors and be like alright so here the sins part of our membership
covenant is that you have to check off what sins are you apart you know are you
involved in you know and they're just like checking it off I don't ask those
questions because I'm not nosy like that I mean it's of my opinion that God will
reveal these things I will find out about them if you know and then I can
deal with it accordingly and I promise you it's happened so many times where
people in our church were involved in fornication for example and I didn't
know about it because I'm not asking like hey you guys living together or
what's what's going on here you know and then literally they'll just have a slip
of the mouth or just say something and you hear it was like oh okay we got to
talk you know I mean like so this is what the Bible says you know so
obviously God wanted me to hear that he wanted me to hear something where I can
just go back and then I can correct it because obviously we got to remove the
lemon because that's what God wants us to do but what I'm saying is this is
that you know be patient with people and and then they don't need to be kicked
out right away sometimes they just need to learn first okay and by the way
that's the same thing with ladies wearing dresses you know ladies don't be
abrasive with the ladies in our church and just be like you know you look like
a hoe right I'm not saying anybody doesn't in our church I'm just giving an
extreme example it would be very funny though I'm just saying like you know
don't be abrasive to them and say why are you wearing pants and I can't
believe you and you know you know that's so worldly no just give them time to
grow give them time to grow okay now with the men I think men can be a little
more harder with men than than women with women men can take it sometimes
they need it a little harder you understand so she'd like the young men
needed a little harder but you know I think we need to make sure that we are
patient with people okay and give them space to repent so this is I'm we said
why are you preaching the sermon because I just want to I want to turn up the
notch on being just a little more normal I'm serious I know that probably
sounds funny but I'm being serious I am being sincere as possible okay where you
know we're not just on this code red all the time where people come and they're
welcomed here and we love them but we don't compromise okay we have policies
we have principles that we Institute and we're obviously not gonna tolerate these
sins it's not like well let's just wait a year let them just live together for
like a year or something like that no that's churches do that I do not do that
they have one week for fornication understand and so go to Psalm 8 if you
would Psalm chapter 8 this is the last portion of Scripture give them giving
them space to repent okay be kind to them be gentle with them be loving to
them and let me just say this none of this applies to reprobate some false
prophets none of this applies to any reprobate or any false prophet or any
sodomite this does not apply to them at all in fact it's like the exact opposite
you know there's a difference between some effeminate guy coming to our church
and some tranny comes to our church and some tranny comes to our church we'll
put on the gloves and we'll pick them up and throw them out harshly okay and
so this does not apply to them I have no interest in being nice to false prophets
and trannies and sodomites I have no interest in being kind to them or loving
to them or patient with them at all I think that's actually against what the
Bible actually teaches okay and so don't confuse what I'm saying right here I'm
talking about people first of all I'm talking about safe people and two people
who are not saved but they need to get saved and they need to be taught okay
and so be gentle and let me explain to you how effective gentleness is on a
person that you exert gentleness on this is how effective it is look at Psalm 80
excuse me Psalm chapter 8 and verse 34 he teacheth my hands to war so that a
bow of steel is broken in mine arms thou has also given me that the shield of
thy salvation and thy right hand hath holding me up and thy gentleness hath
made me great God's gentleness made David great the Bible says he says look
you know and obviously God there's times when God judged David sounds when he
chastised David it sounds when he judged them but he's saying your gentleness
actually made me great what is that showing that's showing the effectiveness
of being gentle with someone you know doesn't the Bible say the goodness and
forbearance of God leadeth thee to repentance when you recognize that you
didn't get what you deserve or you know that God did not punish you when you
deserved it it kind of made you think and say you know what makes me want to
get right with God even more because God is being gentle with me one like manner
if we want people to be great in our church if we want them to go forward in
the Christian life we need to be gentle with them because gentleness can make
someone great okay and again not at the expense of laying down the hammer when
it's needed laying down the axe when it's needed it's exerting this mercy and
and long-suffering towards people when they are actually going in the right
direction how do you know how do you know if someone's going in the right
direction when they step into our doors I mean if they come through the doors of
first works Baptist Church this is the right direction they made a good choice
that's probably the best choice they made that day was when they came to our
church so at that point we can say this person is making some pretty good
decisions because they're here and therefore it's an indication that we
need to be gentle with them amen let's pray father we thank you so much for
your word and Lord help us to be gentle with others Lord as you have been
gentle unto us and I pray God that you'd help us to be kind the
long-suffering towards them and to love them Lord and and to help them to be
great with your gentleness Lord and I pray you bless our church and eat