🎵Music🎵
Alright, good evening everyone. Welcome to First Works Baptist Church.
Let's all make our way inside and find a seat.
Let's grab a song book. Open that song book up to song number 90,
Jesus, Lover of My Soul.
Let's all stand together, if you are able, for this first song.
Song number 90, Jesus, Lover of My Soul.
Everyone, all together, nice and strong on that first verse.
Jesus, lover of my soul, let me to thy bosom fly.
While the near waters roll, while the tempest still is high.
Hide me, O my Savior, hide, till the storm of life is past.
Safe into the haven guide, O receive my soul at last.
Other refuge have I none, hangs my helpless soul on thee.
Still support and comfort me, all my trust on thee is stayed.
All my help from thee I bring.
Cover my defenseless head with the shadow of thy wing.
Thou, O Christ, art all I want, more than all in thee I find.
Raise the fall and cheer the faint, pill the sick and lead the blind.
Just and holy is thy name, I am all unrighteousness.
Vile and full of sin I am, thou art full of truth and grace.
Plenteous grace with thee is found, grace to cover all my sin.
Let the healing streams abound, make and keep me pure within.
Thou of life, the fountain, are freely let me take of thee.
Spring thou up within my heart, rise to all eternity.
Amen. Let's open our service with a word of prayer.
Father, thank you, God, Lord, for allowing us, Father, to be here tonight, Lord,
and hear your word preached unto us, God.
I pray, God, that you would bless the service, Lord, every aspect of it, God.
I pray, Lord, that you would fill a past from here with your Holy Spirit, Lord,
as he preaches to us, God.
I pray, God, that you would give us ears to hear, Lord,
and apply that which we hear preached unto us to our lives, Lord,
that we would leave here edified and changed, Lord,
differently than when we came in, God.
We love you, Lord, and it's in Jesus' name we pray. Amen.
You may be seated. Song number 147.
Leaning on the everlasting arms.
Song number 147.
Leaning on the everlasting arms.
Everyone, all together, nice and strong.
What a fellowship, what a joy divine.
Leaning on the everlasting arms.
What a blessedness, what a peace is mine.
Leaning on the everlasting arms.
Leaning, leaning, safe and secure from all alarm.
Leaning, leaning, leaning on the everlasting arms.
Oh, how sweet to walk in this pilgrim way.
Leaning on the everlasting arms.
Oh, how bright the path grows from day to day.
Leaning on the everlasting arms.
Leaning, leaning, safe and secure from all alarm.
Leaning, leaning, leaning on the everlasting arms.
What have I to dread? What have I to fear?
Leaning on the everlasting arms.
I have blessed peace with my Lord so near.
Leaning on the everlasting arms.
Leaning, leaning, safe and secure from all alarm.
Leaning, leaning, leaning on the everlasting arms.
All right, great singing. Thank you for being here this evening.
Welcome to First Works Baptist Church.
Just a few announcements here before we sing our next song,
which will be song number 29 at the cross.
If you want to get that ready in your song book, song number 29.
If you did not get a bulletin, go ahead and raise your hand
and one of the ushers can get one for you.
Some important information on there as well as the prayer sheet
where the markers are going to come on up in just a bit
to pray over the needs there.
Our Sunday morning service is at 1030.
Sunday evening is at 5 p.m.
And then we have our Thursday night Bible study at 7 o'clock.
Currently going through the book of 2 Samuel.
You see the sowning times and teams.
If you want to learn how to preach the gospel,
we have the service to be placed on the team on Sundays.
That way you can get some, you can be equipped to go sowning
and learn how to share your faith with your family, friends, and strangers.
And so hope to see you on Sunday afternoons for that.
You see the list of expecting mothers there.
Please continue to pray for them.
And the important reminder is there at the bottom.
We have Barstow sowning coming up this Monday, January 16th.
We'll meet here at the building at 1130 for lunch.
And then we'll head out to Barstow for a couple hours to go preach the gospel.
We'll have dinner out there.
If you're interested in participating in that,
you can see Brother Ulysses Hernandez for more details.
You can either meet us out there, as some have already,
or you can just meet us here and you can catch a ride with us.
And so hope to see you there.
Ladies' prayer breakfast is coming up on Saturday, February 4th.
That'll be here at the building.
And then we have the Belize missions trip on Saturday, February 26th through Sunday, March 5th.
And so please be in prayer over that.
The team there would get a lot of people saved.
We would collect a lot of information.
And that, Lord willing, we can have a preaching service in November.
And so just be in prayer over that.
We're looking forward to what the Lord's going to do there.
And then something that's not on the bulletin is on Sunday after the service around 1230,
we have just a 10 to 15 minute lesson on sowning.
And so typically on an annual basis we go over a booklet on how to sown.
We have somewhat of a seminar,
but this time we're just going to break it up into 15 minute bits and pieces on Sunday afternoon.
So I want to encourage you to stay around for that.
And we'll hand you a lesson that you can fill out.
And so hope to see you there.
No food or drink allowed in the main auditorium except for water and coffee.
Make sure you're not loitering in the four-year fellowship hall during the preaching service.
And of course, please make sure you silence your phones during the preaching so as to not be a distraction during the service.
Go ahead and pull out your prayer sheet there.
We'll go over that briefly and then Marcos is going to come on up in just a bit.
Of course, continue to pray for God's favor on our church.
Pray for the sowning for this year that we get a lot of people saved,
not just here in our area, in our immediate Jerusalem,
but also abroad as we go to Belize twice this year.
And pray for the missions, protection.
Pray for a church van.
And continue to pray for the spiritual and American growth of the new people that are in our church,
that they would continue in the grace of God,
and that they would just remain steadfast and unmovable.
And then, of course, you see the church families there, just different families,
salvations, different needs there.
Please continue to pray for Brother Chevy's father.
He's had some more health complications and he's still in the hospital if you can keep him in prayer.
They would greatly appreciate it.
If you have any additional prayer requests, you can put that at the bottom there,
and we can make sure that it gets on the bulletin for the following week.
And that is pretty much it.
Brother Marcos is going to come on up and pray over these needs.
Let's bow our heads and pray.
Dear God Almighty Father, we thank you so much, Lord God,
for just allowing us to be here in your house this evening, Lord God.
Thank you so much for bringing everybody here safely, Lord God.
We do pray that you please, Lord God,
that we would continue to find favor in your eyes, Lord God.
As a church, Lord Heavenly Father, I do pray that you would please allow us to continue to do great works for you.
I pray that you would please continue to use us in a mighty way to reach people in Anaheim,
to reach people in other cities, as in Tustin, Lord God, Paramount, Downey, and other areas.
Lord God, I pray that you would please just continue to use us.
I pray for the soul winning of our church, that you would help us, Lord God,
continue to keep that fire in our hearts, Lord God, for the lost.
I pray that you would please help us, Lord Heavenly Father, also to just reach people, Lord God,
that want to hear, Lord God.
Lord, I pray that you would please, Lord God, just continue to use our church.
I also do pray for the missions, Lord God, of our church.
I pray that you would please, as Bill Ulysses and the team, Lord God,
prepare us to go to Belize, I pray that you would please, Lord God,
prepare their hearts, Lord God, and give them a strategy, Lord God,
and give them a plan, Lord God, to just reach many people, Lord God,
and to prepare the hearts of the people for November, Lord God, as well,
as they prepare for a service out there, Lord God, for November.
I do pray that you would please, Lord God, just instill the hearts of the people of Belize,
Lord God, that they would be willing and wanting to just go to a church service, Lord God,
and just to do something great for you, Lord God, as well.
I pray that you would also just please continue to protect our church, Lord God,
from the enemies, from reprobates, Lord God, that want to disrupt your work here, Lord God.
I do pray that you would please just destroy those individuals, Lord God,
and specifically Ryan Gallagher, Lord God, Leslie Romero, and Seth Bookow.
I pray that you would please just destroy those individuals, Lord God,
that you would please just help them go down into hell quickly, Lord God.
And I pray that you would also just be also with just our leadership here, Lord God.
I pray that you would please just be with our pastor.
Continue, Lord God, to use him in a mighty way, be with his family, Lord God,
put a hedge of protection around them, Lord God.
And I pray that you would also just be with the sowing teams, Lord God,
be with the sowing team leaders, Lord God, as well,
that you would please just allow them, Lord God, to just continue to have a heart for their people, Lord God,
to have vision for their people.
And I pray that you would please, Lord God, also just be with the new people that are here in our church, Lord God.
Lord, I do pray that they would continue to stay in the faith, Lord God,
that they would continue to just want to grow in their faith, Lord God, as well,
to draw closer to you.
And I pray that they would just take the next step, Lord God,
and not just come to church, Lord God, not just to go sowing, Lord God,
but be of service, Lord God, here in your house, Lord God.
And I pray that you would please, Lord God, just move them, Lord God, to do something great, as well.
And I pray for just our families, Lord God, here,
and specifically for Brother Chevy, Lord God, tonight, and his family, Lord God, and his father.
And I pray that you please just be with him as he continues to be in the hospital, Lord God.
I pray that you would please, Lord God, help him, Lord God, to get better.
I pray that you would, please, just give the doctors wisdom, Lord God.
And I pray that you would please just heal Brother Chevy's father, Lord God.
I pray that you would please just be with them, Lord God, as well.
I pray that you would comfort them, Lord God, give them a peace,
a past of understanding, Lord God, as it is a scary time for them, Lord God.
And I pray that you please just be with her the rest of our church. We've got tonight as we
Continue we've got to sing unto you and continue to get prepare our hearts for
The preaching of your word of God as well. We pray now these things in Jesus name. Amen
Please turn your hymnals to song number 29 at the cross
Song number 29
For a third song song 29 at the cross
song number 29
everyone all together nice and strong
Alas, and did my Savior bleed and did my sovereign die
Would he devote that sacred head for such a worm as I?
At the cross at the cross where I first saw the light and the burden of my heart rolled away
It was there by faith. I received my sight and now I am happy all the day
Was it for crimes that I had done he groaned upon the tree
Oh
amazing pity grace
unknown and love
beyond degree
At the cross at the cross where I first saw the light and a burden of my heart
rolled away
It was there by faith. I received my sight and now I am happy all the day
While might the Sun in darkness
hide and shut his glories in
When Christ the mighty maker died for men the
creatures
At the cross at the cross where I first saw the light and the burden of my heart
rolled away
It was there by faith. I received my sight and now I am happy all the day
But drops of grief can
Repay the debt of love I owe
Dear Lord I give myself
Away tis all that I can do
At the cross at the cross where I first saw the light and the burden of my heart
rolled away
It was there by faith. I received my sight and now I am happy all the day
And this time the ushers will collect the offering tonight will be in 2nd Samuel chapter 14
You
Good evening, we're in 2nd Samuel chapter 14
The chapter reads
Now Joab the son of Zirariel perceived that the king's heart was toward Absalom
And Joab sent to Tekoa and fetched thence a wise woman and said unto her
I pray thee find thyself to be a mourner and put on now mourning apparel and anoint not thyself with oil
But be as a woman that had a long time mourned for the dead and come to the king and speak on this manner unto
Him so Joab put the words in her mouth
And when the woman of Tekoa spake to the king she fell on her face to the ground and did obeisance and said help
O king and the king said unto her what aileth thee and she answered
I am indeed a widow woman and mine husband is dead and thy handmaid had two sons
They two strove together in the field and there was none to part them
But the one smote the other and slew him and behold the whole family is risen against thine handmaid
And they said deliver him that smote his brother that we may kill him for the life of his brother whom he slew
And we will destroy the air also
So they shall quench my coal which is left and shall not leave to my husband neither name nor remainder upon the earth
And the king said unto the woman go to thine house
And I will give charge concerning thee and a woman of Tekoa said unto the king my lord
O king the iniquity be on me and on my father's house and the king and his throne be guiltless and the king said
Whosoever set out onto thee bring him to me and he shall not touch thee anymore
Then said she I pray thee let the king remember the Lord thy God
Thou wouldst not suffer the revengers of blood to destroy anymore lest they destroy my son
And he said as the Lord liveth there shall not one hair thy son fall to the earth
Then the woman said let thine handmaid I pray thee speak one
Word unto my lord the king and he said say on and the woman said wherefore then hast thou thought such a great
Such a thing against the people of God
For the king doth speak this thing as one which is faulty that the king doth not fetch home again his banished
For
We must needs die and are as water spilt on the ground which cannot be gathered up again
Neither doth God respect any person yet doth he devise means that is banished be not expelled from him now therefore that I am come
to speak of this thing unto unto my lord the king is because the
The people have made me afraid and I handmade said I will now speak unto the king
It may be that the king will perform the request of his handmaid
Where the king will hear to deliver his handmaid out of the hand of the man that would destroy me my son together
out of the inheritance of God
Then thine handmaid said that the word of my lord the king shall not be comfortable
For as an angel of God so is my lord the king to discern good and bad therefore the Lord thy God will be with
Thee then the king answered and said unto the woman
Hide not from me
I pray thee the thing that I shall ask thee and a woman said let my lord the king now speak
And the king said is not the hand of Joab with thee in all this and
The woman answered and said as thy soul liveth my lord the king none can turn to the right hand or to the left
From aught that my lord the king hath spoken for thy servant Joab
He bade me and he put all these words in the mouth of thine handmaid to fetch about this form of speech hath thy servant
Joab done this thing and my lord is wise
According to the wisdom of an angel of God to know all the things that are in the earth
And the king said unto Joab behold now
I have done this thing go therefore bring the young man Absalom Absalom again
and Joab fell to the ground on his face bowed himself and thanked the king and
Joab said today thy servant knoweth that I have found grace in thy sight my lord a king that the king hath fulfilled the request
Of his servant so Joab arose and went to Gecher and brought Absalom to Jerusalem
And the king said let him turn to his own house and let him not see my face
So Absalom returned to his own house and saw not the king's face
But in all Israel there was none to be so much praised as Absalom for his beauty from the sole of his foot
Even to the crown of his head there was no blemish in him
When he palled his head for it was at every year's end that he palled it because the hair was heavy on him
Therefore he palled it. He weighed the hair of his head at 200 shekels after the king's weight
And unto Absalom there were born three sons and one daughter whose name was Tamar. She was a woman of a fair countenance
So Absalom dwelt two full years in Jerusalem and saw not the king's face
Therefore Absalom sent for Joab to have sent him to the king
But he would not come to him and when he sent again the second time he would not come
Therefore he sent on to his servant see Joab's field is near mine, and he hath barley there
Go and set it on fire and Absalom's servants set the field on fire
Then Joab arose and came to Absalom unto his house and said unto him
Wherefore hath thy servant set my field on fire and Absalom answered Joab behold
I said unto thee saying come hither that I may send thee to the king to say wherefore I might come from Geshur
That been good for me to have been there still now therefore
Let me see the king's face if there be any iniquity in me let him kill me
So Joab came to the king and told him and when he had called for Absalom
He came to the king and bowed himself on his face to the ground before the king and the king kissed Absalom
Thank you Heavenly Father for the King James Bible dear God
We thank you for his wonderful church
You've given us wonderful brothers and sisters that you've given us we thank you for our pastor
Please bless him as he preaches your way tonight in Jesus name we pray. Amen
Amen
Okay, we're continue this evening with the book of 2nd Samuel chapter 14 tonight
And let me just give you a little bit of review to get us caught up on what's going on here in this particular story
In chapter 13 we have the tragic story of Amnon
Essentially raping his half-sister
Tamar and the
repercussions of that is the fact that
Amnon ends up getting murdered by his brother Absalom because of the fact that he raped his sister and so
Of course, we gave a lot of cautionary
principles in chapter 13 and
We see that already the punishment upon David's house is already coming upon him swiftly
You know, this is essentially the prophetic statements that were made by the prophet Nathan upon the house of David for his sin with Bathsheba
And his murder of Uriah it's gonna come back until I'm fourfold because essentially at the end of the day
All four of those sons will be put to death
They're gonna get killed in some way shape or form and it's a fulfillment that the sword shall not depart out of the house of
David and so we begin with that story in chapter 13 now he
Forces Tamar and
Absalom wants revenge and he actually he wants revenge
he wants to kill Amnon, but he's very patient and he essentially takes two years before he does anything and
We saw in chapter 13 that he holds a celebration with a lot of his servants
He invites his father and his servants, but his father and his servants refused to come
And so instead, you know Absalom decides to ask him to invite his other brothers
And really the reason he wants to have this celebration is to have Amnon come to the to the party to the celebration so that he
can be
Vulnerable and then they can kill him right then and there they can ambush him and put him to death and that's exactly what takes place
in chapter 13 so Absalom then he flees into the land of Gesher and
The soul of David the Bible says long to go forth into Absalom
He was comforted regarding his the death of his other son Amnon
But he longed after Absalom
And so this is where we find ourselves here in chapter 14 now
Keep in mind from the time that the rape took place all the way to the time that
Absalom sees the face of his father. It's a total of seven years. Okay, because you have two years after
where
Absalom kills Amnon and then he's in Gesher for three years, but then when he actually comes back to Jerusalem
It's another two years
Before he actually sees the face of his father. So just keep in mind this is taking place between
Essentially a chunk of time of seven years and I'm gonna explain to you why that that's important to know
So tonight we're gonna look at David's partial reconciliation in chapter 14
you know Absalom is gone and all of a sudden Joab takes an interest in bringing
Absalom back now if you follow Joab's track record, okay
If you know his character if you've done an analysis on who he is as a person
His character and his integrity, you know right off the bat. This is not for any noble reason. Okay
He's not trying to you know
Reconcile Absalom to his father David because you know
He just loved seeing a father and a son get along once again and have the kingdom United
He obviously has some underlying motive as to why he's trying to bring him back now look at verse number one
It says now Joab the son of Zeruiah
perceived that the king's heart was toward Absalom and Joab sent it to Koah and fetched thence a wise woman and said unto her
I pray thee feign thyself to be a mourner. Now. What does it mean to feign? In other words is fake yourself
Okay, a mourner is referring to a person who essentially you know in those days
They would actually hire people who are mourners to actually weep and cry and wail if there is some sort of tragic event that took
Place such as the death of a family member and so he's telling this woman
Hey fake as though you are a mourner over a specific personal
Event that happened in your in your life because you're gonna take this
Problem that you're having and you're actually gonna bring it before the courts of the king
You know in those days if the immediate judges weren't able to resolve some sort of conflict
People can go to the courts of the king to go make an appeal to the magistrate there. So Joab
He calls for this woman
Says feign thyself to be a mourner and put on now mourning apparel and anoint not thyself with oil
But be as a woman that had a long time mourned for the dead and come to the king and speak on this manner unto him
So Joab put the words in her mouth
So we're gonna see in just a bit that this woman comes to David with essentially this parable this story and
We'll get into that just a bit. But the question is this why is Joab doing this?
Why is he trying to bring Absalom back from Gesher and trying to get him to reconcile his differences with his father
Well, let me just say this. It's I don't believe it's for any noble reason
Here are three possible reasons as to why and obviously the scriptures doesn't don't explicitly tell us as to why
But taking jobs character into account. These are some pretty likely reasons. Okay, number one being you know, he's trying to avoid a rebellion
You see if Absalom is out there and he's the king's son
We see later that he's actually favorable in the eyes of Israel Israel actually like they like Absalom
He could create some sort of rebellion and some you know, there could a civil war could break out essentially
Okay
That could be a reason why he's trying to avoid that
So he wants Absalom to be reconciled to his father not because he loves the king and not because he loves the king's son
But just because he doesn't want you know some civil war to break out
Another reason could be the reason he wants Absalom to come back is because Absalom is the next in line to be king
So if he's the next in line to be king
Joab is essentially securing himself a job
For when David dies he has it in good with the next king, which is Absalom
Okay, that could be a reason but I think the main reason why he's doing it is
Essentially just to gain favor with David. Okay, because you said well, how do you know he doesn't care for Absalom?
How do you know he doesn't care for David?
Well, because then he brings Absalom back to Jerusalem and he just like leaves him there
Okay, and then Absalom was just like hey, let me see my dad's face
Let me go talk to my dad and Joab just ignores him the entire time. He doesn't care about reconciling them
He doesn't care about you know, whether they resolve the conflict or not. He's like my job is taken care of
You know David has essentially recognized him as doing a great deed and having wisdom for bringing
Absalom back. So that's why and look if you study the character of Joab he is
You know constantly seen as being a person of deceit. He's conniving
He is selfish. He's self-willed
He's an individual who's not doing things for the benefit of Israel nor for the benefit of the magistrate
Nor for the benefit of anybody else but to only benefit himself
Okay, and we know that he is this type of person because even though Absalom later on takes over the kingdom
You know, he kind of usurps the authority of his father
He still follows David, but then later on
Adonijah takes over and then he follows after Adonijah
So, you know we see there that he obviously is a person who has self-interest
He's trying to exalt himself and promote himself
He's always looking for a way to do so
So I just want to make myself very clear that Joab is not doing this because he's a good person or he has the best
Intentions for the kingdom. He obviously has a selfish reason why he wants to do these things
Okay, and so let that be a lesson to us all that you know, obviously as Christians, you know
We naturally as human beings do things to benefit ourselves
But the Bible also tells us to esteem others better than ourselves, you know
Our natural propensity is to lift ourselves up or do that which benefits us
Or do that which you know will cause us to have success
But we need to put ourselves in a state of mind and walk in the spirit to realize
Hey, we need to make sure that we put ourselves last right and put others first
We need to put our families first. We need to put the brethren first. We need to put the loss first
We need to have us last and not be like a Joab where you're just doing things and serving others
For the sake of how it might benefit you in the long run
okay, and so he has this arrangement with the woman of Tekoa to fake being a mourner in order for her to
Essentially catch David in his words. Okay. So now we're gonna see her come before the king and then she essentially gives us analogy of
Absalom and Amnon through a fake story of her two sons. Okay. Now Joab is really sneaky
Because he obviously understands he can't have because he's the one who puts the words in her mouth. Okay. What does that mean?
He's like this is what you're gonna say
This is the story that you're gonna put forth
So this didn't stem from the the mind of the woman at Tekoa this came from Joab
Joab is the one who construed this story. He made up all these details and
It shows that Joab is pretty smart because of the fact that if David if the story was too similar to David's situation
David will obviously be suspicious and he would know right off the bat. Hey, what's going on here type of a thing
So that the story had to be altered just a bit the difference being or the similarities being that you know
You have two sons one killing the other now. Let me just say this. Okay
David obviously, he's a wise man, but he's lacking some wisdom here. Okay, because look, you know
Just a bit ago. He was confronted by Nathan who gave him a parable and
Then it was like thou art the man
Okay, and so, you know, I'll be really suspicious of anybody else bringing parables to me if I was David and be like, okay
Well, first of all, are you talking about me? You know me like before you bring any story up to me
Are you using this against me? You know what I mean?
Does this have to do with my family or something like that, but he's completely oblivious to that
And you know if I was him, I'd be like no more meetings, you know
You know, I want some names to be dropped. You know, I don't want a
These anonymous people to come up to me these anonymous stories or whatever, you know
this better be a real thing because it's happening again to him and
You know as Nathan the woman at the Ko is gonna say basically thou art the man. I'm talking about you and your sons
Okay, so look at verse number four
It says and when the woman of Tekoa spake to the king
She fell on her face to the ground and did obesions and said help O King obesions simply means honor
reverence to the king
Verse five says in the king sentence her what Aleth thee and she answered
I am indeed a widow woman and mine husband is dead and I handmade had two sons and they too
Strove together in the field and there was none to part them
but the one smote the other beat the other okay and
slew him and behold the whole family is risen against thine handmade and they said
Deliver him that smote his brother that we may kill him for the life of his brother whom he slew and we will destroy
The air also and so they shall quench my coal which is left and shall not leave to my husband
Neither name nor remainder upon the earth
So she brings this conflict where she says, you know
my sons were basically fighting one kills the other with his bare hands and
One side of the family wants that individual dead but not just that individual
they want to kill even the air of that individual and just kind of wipe off that lineage off the face of the earth and
I'm caught in this conflict. Okay, and
He says in verse number eight and the king said unto the woman go to thine house
I will give thee charge concerning thee. So he's just like I'll fix this later. Let me think about this for a minute, you know
and the woman of Tekoa said unto the king my lord o king the iniquity be on me and on my father's house and the
King and his throne be guiltless and the king said whosoever saith ought unto thee bring him to me and he shall not touch thee
Anymore
Then she said I pray thee let the Kings remember the Lord thy God that thou wouldest not suffer the revenger's of blood to destroy
Anymore lest it destroy my son so on and so forth. So what's going on here?
Basically, she's trying to get him
To pardon the son who killed the other son
So that she could essentially bring that to David and say, okay, I'm talking about Absalom and Abner. Okay
Trying to keep the revenger of blood
From essentially killing the individual you say now, why would they do that? Why would she go along with this?
Why?
Because we see later on that she seems to be very distressed over the actual situation between Ammon and Absalom
What we'll see later on is because Israel likes Absalom. He's actually a man who is praised in Israel
He's a man who is honored there people like who he is
And so it could be that they want the king to pardon Absalom of the murder that he committed
Okay
Now when when David gives in and says, yeah, no one's gonna touch him. It's gonna be okay. What is he doing?
He's essentially securing the safety of Absalom right now look at verse number 12
it says then the woman said let that handmaid I pray thee speak one word unto my lord the king and he said say on and
the woman said
Wherefore then hast thou thought such a thing against the people of God for the king doth speak this thing as one which is faulty
And that the king does not fetch home again his banished
Finally the the truth comes out and he basically says well, you know if you're willing to pardon my son
Who you know committed this crime and say that no one's gonna touch him then?
Why don't you fetch Absalom and make sure and you secure his safety as well? Okay, very tricky here
And it says in verse 14 for we must needs die and ours water spilt on the ground which cannot be gathered up again
Neither does God respect any persons yet doth he devise means that his banished be not expelled from him now
Let's talk about a couple things here. Let's give some application
First of all, she says that it says water spilt on the ground
Now, what does that refer to well, you know
I preached a sermon a couple years ago called as water spilt on the ground and I explained essentially that when you spill water on
The ground you can't gather back together. It's just the damage is done
right and what she's referring to is the fact that
Absalom killing Amnon is a situation where the damage has been done. There's no reconciling that anymore
You know, sometimes there are certain situations in life where maybe you messed up or you know
Someone messed up or did something wrong and you know what?
There's always forgiveness and there's always a even opportunity to forget but sometimes the damage is so bad
There's no coming back from that right? It says water
Spilt on the ground which cannot be gathered again
Now you say well, what's the point of that? You know, are you trying to give me hope?
Well, I'm trying to warn those who have not yet spilt the water
Okay, those are you young people who haven't screwed up your lives
You haven't you know gotten involved in drugs gotten involved in drinking you haven't gotten involved in fornication
You haven't gotten involved in some wicked sin that can take you out of God's will and destroy your life
You essentially still have the water in the bottle
You know what the moment you decide well
I'm gonna just spread a little here and spread a little there then here's the thing
You're not gonna be able to gather that up together
Once you decide to sleep around and whore around and be a whore monger
Okay, that water spilt on the ground. Just just just kind of see that as your purity and your virginity
You can't gather back back together again. Once it's spilled to spill right your purity is spilled. It's gone
You can't gather it back up to get again. Okay, and there's so many conflicts that people can have
Situations decisions that they've made and I guarantee you the room I'm not saying the room is filled with this tonight
But I'm sure there's a lot of people tonight that can look back and say you know what?
There's a situation in my life that at the end of the day. It can't be fixed. There's no fixing it
You know what? I mean? I can still serve God. I can still love the Lord
I can still succeed in the Christian life
But this aspect of my life is like water spilt on the ground that cannot be gathered to get
Excuse me, cannot be gathered again. Okay, and so this is a warning to you young people to make sure
That you are vigilant you walk circumspectly and listen to your parents
One of the greatest things you could do as a young person is
You give heed to the advice of your parents, okay, obviously if your parents are telling you to do something sinful
You know, that's not what I'm referring to. It's like well, my dad said, you know a couple beers here and there
It's not gonna hurt anybody
You know, obviously that's wrong. Obviously, that's foolish and you know, I don't think anybody in this room is placed in that situation. Okay
However, you know, there's a lot of good advice that parents give even if they're not saved my friends
Okay, even if they're not saved they don't have the Word of God and I can't speak for everyone here
But listen to me in general
Parents do lead you in the right direction. And even if your parents are not fundamental Baptists, they don't believe the Bible
They're not zealous for the things of God as you are just mere subjection to your parents brings God's blessing upon your life
Okay mere obedience to your unsaved parents
Will essentially give you longevity of life according to the Bible, okay
Listen to your parents, you know if your parents tell you hey, you know, don't date this girl
Don't say well I want to though. I
love her
Don't be like an amnib
Okay, because you know what your parents have been around the block. They know things they they have
Wisdom they have experience and maybe they see something in that girl
There is not necessarily what's best for you and you can't see beyond tomorrow
and so it's best to just listen to mom listen to dad about that guy or that girl and
You don't want to be looking seven years down the road and look back and look at the the water that was spilt on
The ground that cannot be gathered again
Okay, and so, you know, this is a scary warning and you know what David understands this
Because he can't bring amnim back
he can't go back to that rooftop where he saw Bathsheba bathing and
Like look away and just not commit that wicked sin of adultery and not murder your right that's been done with
He spilt that water in the ground. It's over and done with he's reaping the consequences of his actions
You know, you know what, you know what helps us to stay right with God
Obviously looking at God's blessings and seeing how God will bless you for your obedience
But you know what also helps us to get right with God and stay right with God fearing God or
fearing the consequences of our actions
Nothing wrong with looking at a decision and saying what are the consequences to this if I commit this sin?
If I if I you know take this action, what is this gonna do to me in the long run?
You know, the Bible says that the prudent man for seeth evil and hide it himself. Are you prudent today?
Are you actually foreseeing the evil in 2023?
In your spiritual life in your marriage with your children, you know at work here in church
You know
God expects for us to actually take into account the actions that we are planning to make the decisions that we're planning to do
Because all actions have consequences
Okay, and again, you don't want to look back and just see water spilt on the ground and just be regretful
Oh, man, I wish I'd made a better decision. Oh, man. I wish I had done this. It's too late
It's too late
It's too late David. You already made the decision
You sin your son's dead and your other son is banished. I mean David was a godly man
He's a man who loved the Lord. He's a man after God's own heart, but you know what? He was a bad father though
He sucked as a dad. Let's just be honest with you. Okay, his parenting was terrible. He was a good king
You wrote a lot of good Psalms
You know, I mean we sing them
He was a great warrior
He he's one of the favored characters in the Old Testament
But this is one little thing that he just lacked on and that was his parenting. Okay
he obviously was a bad parent and didn't take these things into account and
so she she just has this boldness to just kind of like confront him to the face about this and
Say basically that she's talking about him now
I want you to notice verse 14 look what it says for we must needs die and are as water spilt on the ground
Which cannot be gathered up again?
Listen to this neither does God respect any person
Yet that he devised means that is banished be not expelled from him
So she's obviously trying to make a comparison here and say, you know, even when God punishes his children
When they're away from him, he devises means by which to reconcile his children once again unto him
right and
What is this referring to? Well, you know just the the the the phrase here
Can be essentially explained as you know
We as God's children save people when we sin we do wrong when we get out of God's will we don't lose our salvation
Obviously this is impossible to lose it
The Bible says I give it to them eternal life and listen to this they shall never perish
Neither shall any man including yourself?
Pluck them out of my hand
Saying he's given eternal life
Bible tells us he that believeth on the Sun hath everlasting life
He that believeth not the Sun shall not see life
But the wrath of God abideth on him one of the strongest
Passages or concepts and doctrines in the Bible regards to salvation to prove you can't lose it is the fact that once we get saved
We become what children of God?
But as many as receive them John 1 12
But as many as receive them to them gave you power to become the sons of God even unto them that believe on his name
You know the Bible tells us in 1 John chapter 3
You know what behold what manner of love the Father had bestowed upon us that we should be called the sons of God
okay, and
Don't you know just kind of overstep that those those passages because it's essentially telling us
It's proof that we can never lose that gift
You say well, how do you know, you know?
Well because of the fact that you know, my mom I can never stop being my mom's son
I can never stop being my father's son
Even if we don't get along which we do. Okay, put that out there, you know, let's say we don't get along. We're fighting
We're just you know
We have conflict and and whatnot. I can't change the DNA in my arm in my my body
You know to say that I'm not their child their offspring
I will always be their offspring even if the relationship isn't right
Well in like manner when you get saved you become a child of God and you can't change that you become regenerated and
You say well, what are you saying though?
Are you saying you can just sin and nothing will ever happen to you?
And this is a common accusation that people will bring to us because we believe in once they've always saved
They'll say you're saying that you can believe on Jesus Christ and just live however you want with no consequences
But you know what you can scour hundreds of my sermons that I've never said that before and
No one here actually believes that at all. Okay, you know what we believe is if you believe on Jesus Christ for salvation
You'll never lose your salvation. However, God will chastise you on this earth
He will punish you the Bible says whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth and scourgeth listen to this
every son whom he receiveth
So if you're a Christian
And you're living in the world. You're you're getting involved in sin
You're a fornicator
You're acting like a whore or whatever may be as the Bible puts it
The Bible says if you're not punished for that the Bible actually says in Hebrew chapter 12, then are you bastards in those sons?
and a bastard is someone who's illegitimate and
The the interpretation of that is that you're not saved, right?
you know, for example, I remember a couple months ago someone came to our church and
They thought they were saved, you know, but but they weren't
We I had asked her a couple questions and she just you know
She felt like she you could lose it and there's a bunch of things you have to do to keep it and whatnot
But then they give her the gospel
She ended up getting saved. But prior to that she said well, here's my number one reason why I know I'm saved
You know, she's like because I've been involved in all kinds of sin and God's never punished me for it
She's
Like I've never actually suffered any like punishment for the sins that I've committed and I'm like, well, you know what?
That's it
That's actually an indication that you're not saved and I went to Hebrew chapter 12 and I showed her what the Bible says
She was like, oh man, I didn't know that
I'm like, yeah, you know cuz God's not gonna chastise
Someone who's not his child you understand, but if you are his child if you are a safe person
You know, he is going to punish you here on this earth
He's gonna allow you to suffer the consequences of your actions and let me say this when God chastises you you know it
Okay, he hit you where it hurts whether it's in your health your finances
Whatever may be God allows punishment to come upon you for your disorder for your open rebellion and disobedience
Against him now. Listen what it says. It says that he devises means
right
That is banished be not expelled from him
This is referring to God
So this means that even when a person gets away from God he devises means to essentially get those who have been expelled
Essentially to be reconciled back up to him
So, you know when someone gets away from God they get out of church they get away from the Bible
They get away from godly living
Don't worry about it
Because God is already devising means to get that person back on track
Okay, now we often think you know
Oh, we got to love that person and be kind to that person and show the love of God to that person
Actually, what you need to do is just pray that God punishes that person
You're like why because that's what gets their attention best
You know if they're out there and they're succeeding and they're doing well they have no reason to get back into God's will
They're like look I could be an open rebellion and everything's going great
But folks anybody who has been outside of God's will for any length of time can tell you
God's punishment or anybody who's been out of the will of God and then
They were reconciled back into the will of God
They can tell you you know what this happened to me and it got my attention
And it made me get back on track and made me get back into church and back into the will of God
Why because God devises means by which to do so, okay?
He's not a respecter of persons
He said what if that person just refuses that punishment though like they just refuse to repent refuse to get right well
Did you know that God kills people?
Now he kills unsaved people
But you know what he also kills his own people too because the Bible says in Romans chapter 12
You know avenge not yourselves vengeance belongeth unto me saith the Lord
I will repay and he's referring to like your enemies and my enemies however in Hebrew chapter 10
He quotes that same exact verse, and then he says the Lord will judge his people
So that that verse applies to you as much as it applies to your enemies as well
God will strike vengeance upon you for your disobedience for your
Rebellion against him for your unwillingness to get right with God. He will strike you with vengeance, okay?
Why because he devised means by which you know he can
Essentially reconcile his banished once again
and
So she's saying this because of the fact that you know she's basically telling David you should be this way devise a way
To get Absalom back into you know your graces back to Jerusalem
Reconcile this fix this okay verse 15 now therefore that I am come to speak of this thing unto my lord the king
It is because the people have made me afraid and my handmaid said I will now speak unto the king
It may be that the king will perform the request of his handmaid
But the king will hear to deliver his handmaid out of the hand of the man that will destroy me and my son together out
of the inheritance of God
Then the dine handmaid said the word of my lord the king shall now be comfortable
For as an angel of God so as my lord the king to discern good and bad therefore the Lord thy God
Will be with thee now
I want you to pay attention to verse 18
Then the king answered and said unto the woman hide not from me
I pray thee the thing that I shall ask thee the woman said let my lord the king now speak and
The king said is not the hand of Joab with thee in all this
So he's like this is this is very very sneaky of you to say all this
It has Joel abs fingerprints all over it
So he's like you know you asked me something. I'm gonna ask you something the jaw put you to this now
What does this tell you it shows us?
That David is very familiar
With Joe abs tactics and methods. He's very familiar with his deceit with his his cunning behavior
You know the fact that he's discreet and not in a good way
He obviously sees that Joe ab is not a good person and that he's essentially the one who put
This woman up to this okay, and the woman answered and said as thy soul liveth my lord the king
None can turn to the right hand or to the left from ought that my lord the king had spoken for thy servant job
He bade me and he put all these words in my mouth of thine handmaid
To fetch about this form of speech and so on and so forth so she's basically saying you know what?
Everything I told you came from the mouth of Joe ab so you know even after she confronts him
She even says later on like oh, man these people want to kill me because of my sons
But that's not even true because she doesn't even have this this is these are all it's a fake story
Okay
It's a fake story that came from the mouth of Joe ab
now I
Want to talk a little bit about the fact that?
when David
Brings Absalom back because you know he goes to Joe ab and he says go get Absalom fine
Go get him bring him back, and then Joe ab is just like oh King. You know and he's like praising him
He's just kind of flattering him, and he's happy about it or whatever
but then Absalom comes back and
He stays in Jerusalem for a full two years
Without ever seeing his father's face
He said what's the problem with that?
Well, this is a partial reconciliation
Okay, and I think this teaches a really important principle when it comes to conflict okay?
You see when we have conflict with in with our children and marriage with one another
It's important that we resolve the conflict immediately and listen to this
completely
not partially
Okay
When you chastise your children for their disobedience to you?
Chastisement is only one part of the equation
Spanking your child is only one part of the equation. He said what's the other part actually reconciling with them?
Confirming your love toward them and
You know actually talking to them and letting them know that it's forgiven and forgotten
you see when we sin against God and
The Bible tells us that if we confess our sins
He's faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness
You know one thing that God doesn't do he doesn't keep rubbing our sin in our faces
Right he doesn't loom over us over our failures
Who does that Satan does that he's the accuser of the Brethren right?
God doesn't do that as soon as you're forgiven you're forgiven. It's all done with let's move on. Let's keep serving God and
You know the mercies of the Lord are new every day the Bible says
So whatever happened yesterday is all done with and if you've confessed that you got it right with God you repented
guess what today's a new day and
You can serve God and being his good graces and experience the love of God in your life
And and and serve him with the clear conscience why because when God resolves a conflict he resolves it just immediately
Just like it's over and done with he separated your transgressions as far as East is from West
He's cast them into the deepest part of the ocean never to be remembered again
I mean he's constantly reiterating the fact that once you get right with God. It's over and done with
We need to follow that pattern my friends, okay?
Let me give you some examples. Okay way to apply this
You know when you spank your children
You know there shouldn't be
Blocks of time after the spanking where you just don't talk to your kids or something
You know growing up. I didn't grow up in a Christian home. It was kind of like that. You know I mean
You know it's just you catch a really bad whooping
Like one of those really bad ones you know
And I deserved it
For sure looking back. I'm like yeah, I deserved that for sure
You know, but there's times when I got whoopings, and then you know like we didn't talk to each other for like three days or something
And
Even when we started talking it wasn't like hey, I'm sorry
You know forgive me. It was like. There's your food eat it. You know come out for dinner
Or something you know and then that was like our way of like okay now. We're in talking terms again
Understand and it wasn't just with Mike my mom who's like that with my siblings as well
Anytime my siblings, and I would fight would get in a really big argument or a physical
altercation of some sort
You know and we were at odds one against one another
No, you know once it was resolved or once someone got beat up or something like that
You know it would the conflict was not resolved because there was no apologies
There was no confirming one loved one toward another it was just this this awkward silence between one another for like a couple days and
Then you just bring up something random, and then now you're on talking terms again or something
Okay
How many you know what I'm to or am I the only one who is who went through that abuse?
Am I you guys know what I'm talking about okay?
And one of the reasons why is because you know just unsaved people don't know how to resolve conflict
and it's awkward and
You know and and but here's the thing as parents we need to resolve conflict immediately after chastisement because we create we can create
Bitterness and anxiety in the life of your child
Because then they're just like you know
Are they still mad at me am I still in trouble am I still gonna get it?
You know what's there's this there's this constant question looming in their minds as to like what's gonna happen now
You know I mean, and then when dinner's on the table, and you're addressed and not in relation to your crime
You're like okay
I think everything's okay now you know and then you just you know you eat
And then maybe like a month later you guys are good again or something like that you know
But you know you need to make sure that
When you chastise your child because obviously we want to place a heavy emphasis on on chastising children because the Bible teaches us that amen
The Bible says if you don't spank your child, then you hate your child so the Bible says okay
It's important that parents chastise their children
But here's the thing it's equally as important to make sure that conflict is resolved even after that
Okay, you say well. What do you mean by that?
Well when the spanking is done
There needs to be reconciliation
forgiveness
Confirming your love for your children hugging them helping them to move on from the conflict. That's what they need okay, and
So it's not just like you know and by the way spanking you know should only be on the bottom
Okay
You know don't take that that spanking so far
It's just like well for me is five across the face or something like that you know
and
You know that people do that you know it's the ringing of the hair
It's smacking across the mouth or whatever you know now. You know I get it you know
there's some teenagers and some adults today that need a smack across the mouth sometimes and
It's just like you need a smack across the mouth because you were never spanked on the bottom when you're a little
That's what it is
So you spank them on the bottom when they're younger. They don't need a smack across the mouth when they're older
You know I mean especially this generation this younger generation coming out
They just have no fear of people because they've never been punched in the mouth
You know I mean like I've been punched in the mouth, and it taught me things
The pain taught me like you know what I'm not gonna open my mouth like that again
I'm not gonna say the wrong thing to the wrong person. I don't want my mouth to call for strokes amen
And so obviously there's there's a lot of rebellious people out there disrespectful people
I mean folks social media is filled with accounts that literally thrive on pranks I
mean really bad pranks
Where they're just disrespecting strangers left and right now given some of them are staged
I get that, but I don't think all of them are staged though
I've seen some pretty crazy ones where it's just like this person's gonna get killed one day
This is one guy who's just like he goes to
Some of the most ghetto areas
Yes, I already know where I'm going with this they go to some of the most ghetto areas
And he just approaches like some gang member looking guy as if he's gonna like fight him and the guy like pulls out a gun
He's like oh, it's just a prank. It's a prank. It's a prank. It's like all that for views
You're gonna die
Doing something stupid like that
But it's created a culture in our society
Where young people are not afraid to disrespect their elders to disrespect
Just any Joe Schmoe on the street and just mouth off to anybody because they were not disciplined when they were younger
Okay
You know I'm you say why are you a pastor not a gang member because I got whooped when I was younger
You know one of the reasons I got saved is because of the fact that my mom actually disciplined me
She spanked me, and it delivered my soul from hell. It taught me that life has consequences now
You know she didn't do it the fundamental Baptist way
Per se you know what I mean on the bottom. She she was very creative
in
her disciplines
She had various weapons that she would use
And
Obviously, I'm not condoning that at all, but you know what if
You say if you could go back would you change that no I wouldn't
You know if I could choose between no Spanx at all or those types of Spanx
I would now if I were to choose that now I would say I'll still
It still taught me something amen and
So I don't know where I was going with that, but it's always good to talk about
Disciplining your children discipline their children your children, so they don't become brats later on when they grow up
spoiled
disrespectful brats
Okay, you know spoiled disrespectful teenagers that don't know how to shake a grown man's hand
Yes, sir. No, sir. Yes, ma'am. No ma'am, and just you know think that they could just live life without any consequence whatsoever
This is not the way to live my friends
Teach your children to be respectful
Punish them and chastise them discipline them when they do wrong
Okay
However once that punishment has been distributed
Reconciliation is a need okay
Confirming your love towards them because at the end of the day
They know they need some form of discipline for their actions
But they want to know that they're in right standings with you thereafter
okay, and
So once the discipline has been issued you need to make sure you reconcile
Thereafter love them move on take them out for ice cream play with them, whatever well, how about in marriage well
You know what marriage is the same thing?
Because you know a husband and wife you know
It's like the flesh versus the spirit
And depending how you're wired you might be the flesh you might be the spirit
I'm just kidding. You know there's there's conflict in marriage as well, okay, and
You know obviously there's no discipline in marriage, okay?
It's just like who's the disciplinary in this you know situation here, but obviously there's gonna be conflicts and when there's conflict
Reconciliation is in need don't let the don't let the Sun go down upon your wrath men
okay, it was like all right my wife made me so upset and she did X Y & Z and
You know now. I know why the Bible says be not bitter against them
Because I'm bitter right now don't let the Sun go down upon your wrath though
Grow up suck it up
Don't be a victim
Well she needs to understand my needs shut up and get up and go to work
Go get some go get some sleep go apologize to your wife
Go have harmony in your home and go to work tomorrow and forget about the whole thing thereafter
Okay, look I understand that in marriage
Disrespectful things are said sometimes or
There's conflict, but you know what we can't just allow conflict to go unresolved perpetually
Okay, and if you want harmony in your home if you want peace in your home
It's important that the man of the house the one who's in charge
the boss
The Lord I mean what else can I say here the head honcho the big cheese?
What else what the hefe
Come on. Give me another one the king of the home of course the 15 year olds gonna
He picks the highest position in the land
Surprised he didn't say like God or something you know you know the king
Now these are all great titles right oh, but hold on a second it's important for that man to initiate
And go apologize and have you know
Benevolence towards his spouse towards his wife, and you said well, what if she was wrong?
We'll just be the bigger man and just say look. I'm sorry
and
And you know what who cares whose fault it is
You know when it's my wife's fault, and this is you know often of course
You
Know
Even if it's my wife's fault, and she's the one guilty of something I
Don't even care honestly. I just want to get along with my wife
So I'll often tell her like you know what I'm just sorry for my attitude towards you
That's what I'll tell her
I'm sorry because I've had a really bad spirit towards you because of you know X Y & Z or whatever and
And I'm really sorry you know what that provokes her to apologize as well
And it's not like we're just trying to get the last word in either. You know I mean you're like. I'm sorry, but
Just want to say this though
I'll finish with this you know you know
X Y & Z I didn't really like what he said that but I guess you know oh
We just apologize we kiss and make up and then we just move on with our lives thereafter
Why because it's important you don't have to get the last word in in your marriage
You don't need to get the last word in because this is not a competition of who could be the better spouse
You guys are a team. We're a team working towards the same goal fighting against the same enemy and no
I'm not talking about your spouse
Talk about the world the flesh and the devil
So instead of trying to get the last word in really trying to figure out who started it all just
Apologize and say you know what I messed up forgive me
And you know what when you're willing to be the bigger man and do that guess what your wife will be the bigger woman
Right and do the same and then also apologize and say you know what I messed up, too
I shouldn't have said this or I shouldn't have done that and then it's just more important to actually resolve the conflict my friends
Instead of just trying to get the last word in
You know what in marriage your marriage could just improve that much better if you just realize don't try to get the last word in
It man it's quiet. I'm gonna. I'm done on this chapter. I'm gonna spend the rest of the sermon on this
You don't have to get the last word in I know you're an apologist
I know you can come up with all types of good arguments. I know you've memorized Ephesians 5
You know, but you know you need to just humble yourself and just say I'm sorry
Forgive me because it's far more important to just resolve the conflict
Than to perpetuate a conflict where you're the right one and
She's the wrong one or vice-versa
And you just want to make sure that she understands that you want to make sure that he understands that you know
I thought the Bible says that to allow yourself to be what?
defrauded
Isn't that what the Bible says?
Doesn't the Bible teach us that we should?
practice being defrauded
What does that mean allow yourself to be wrong sometimes?
I mean think about everything that happened to Jesus Christ
He didn't deserve any of it, but he allowed himself to be defrauded
You know it would do you good to allow yourself to be defrauded sometimes even in your marriage
Where your your wife does you wrong or something like that or you know?
She made some comment about how chunky you are or something and you know
She made fun of you somehow, and then you hurt your little feelings
You know it ruined your day or whatever
And just say you know what I am a little chunky
So be it you know
Then go eat a cheeseburger afterwards
And drown away your sorrows in fast food or something you know
I'm just saying you know we need to develop thick skin in marriage too and
Not allow you know days and weeks or hours to just go by without resolving
Conflict okay
As soon as it happens resolve it and and here's the thing you know especially if you have children in the home
Children need to see the parents can resolve conflicts
That dad can apologize
That mom can apologize that you know that there's harmony there
Because one of the biggest things that children need listen to this is security
And I know this is the most interesting sermon you've ever heard in your life, okay?
And so that's why I'm spending more time on this, but this is important
Okay
Children require security, and you know what they get security from seeing mom and dad love each other and get along
But when there's division in marriage when there's division between a husband and wife that causes insecurity in a child
Because we're essentially the the foundation of their security
They depend on us to have everything together, okay?
And look you may be in this room you think to yourself none of this applies to me because i'm either divorced or i'm not
Married or whatever, but you know what there's some who are married
There's some who are gonna get married, and you need to give heed to this warning here
And and practice this in your marriage
resolving conflict how about in church
You better resolve conflict in church, too
You know you got beef with someone in our church or something because they took the last cookie
And you know they knew that you wanted it
Or whatever and they did it to spite you allow yourself to be defrauded of that cookie
You can go without a cookie every once in a while too probably need to go without some cookies
Right everyone's all afraid to say amen say, amen
Fear not
You have good courage
You know someone
Disrespects you or says something about you
You know let it be like water off a duck's back
And you know i've realized that and obviously i'm not saying that someone is just blatantly disrespectful
And they're just kind of being like a nuisance that's different i'm just saying people who don't necessarily practice a whole lot of discretion
And maybe they say something that hurts your feelings let it be like water off the duck's back
Don't think so highly of yourself
That it's just the greatest offense that you can ever experience and you're going to stop coming to this church because of this one person
You need to start going to this church because of this one person which is jesus amen
And stop allowing that one person to just get you out of church
You know uh and i'm gonna speak to the ladies too because this often happens with ladies more often than with men
All right, and I know it's gonna get a little quiet in here. You know sometimes ladies have conflict with one with another
They get you know home girls fighting with this home girl and this girl is mad at this lady
And then you know this lady said and you got your little clicks going on in church
Gang a is against gang b
You know because you know because one of them walked into church and just kind of looked at them all weird or something like that
And now it's just like there's conflict get over it grow up. This is a church
This isn't high school
This isn't junior high
Be kind one to another
Tender-hearted forgiving one another even as god for christ's sake hath forgiven you
Stop being a little junior higher and go to that person who you're mad at, you know, because they stole your bbf
I don't know
What did girls get mad at anyway? I don't know whatever ladies get mad at each other for
Go resolve that and say you know what? I'm sorry for saying this. I'm sorry for looking at you like this
You know, let's be friends again. We're christians here my friends
Now I shouldn't address the men
You know what I mean because this should not be happening with the guys
I don't think it's happening with the guys
But you know what if that's happening with the guys you not only need to grow up you need to stop being so soft and
effeminate too
Okay
Stop acting like a little girl and getting your feelings hurt anytime. Someone says something or whatever, you know what I mean?
You're a man grow up have some thick skin
Love the brothers love the brotherhood in the church. Amen
And that's it and resolve conflict
look, at least we don't have a uh, you know,
We don't have a rule here that you have to fight or something every time you guys get
That's how people things used to get resolved back in the day
If there's like a conflict there was an alley where everyone to go to in high school, and then you just duke it out
Okay
blood and all
We don't have a but maybe we should have no I'm just kidding
That would actually do good to a lot of the people in our church actually no, I'm just kidding
We don't have that but you know, what you could do is just be a man and go to that person and say hey
I'm really sorry about what I said
I'm sorry that I offended you, you know, and and and don't be like but you did do this though
It's more important to resolve conflict than to try to perpetuate a conflict because you want to be the person with the last word
okay, be the bigger man be a Christian be filled with the spirit and
Understand that we have a common enemy and no it's not one another
Okay, and so I spent a lot of time on that because this is what David's doing, you know, he he has his partial reconciliation
Where Absalom is back, but he doesn't see his father's face for a whole two years. That's sad
It's very sad. Okay, and it shouldn't be that way and obviously that
Created bitterness within Absalom and and he was upset at that look at verse number 25
Says but in all but in all Israel there was none to be so much praised as Absalom for his beauty
From the sole of his foot even to the crown of his head. There was no blemish in him
so he would be considered a good-looking guy and the reason I think the Bible's mentioning this is because
Outwardly he has essentially the
Qualifications that Israel will require for a king, you know, because if you remember Saul was head and shoulders above everyone else
he looked like he was gonna be a king and
So essentially Absalom has the advantage here because Israel likes him because he just looks like he would be a king, right?
He just has all these physical qualities and when he pulled his head meaning he cut his his hair
For it was at every year's end that he pulled it because the hair was heavy on him
Therefore he pulled it. He weighed the hair of his head at 200 shekels after the king's weight now
I think the reason the Bible is mentioning this
Is to show us that Absalom is just a rebel
He's a disobedient
Rebellious person say why because men ought not to have long hair. Amen
You know does not nature even teach you that if a man have long hair it is a shame unto him
That's what the Bible says. And in fact when a man has long hair
He's essentially indicating that he is usurping his God-given authority
understand
Which is exactly what Absalom is gonna do if he's growing out his hair
He has all this long hair or whatever and he pulls it every year, but he's just letting it grow
He's a person who's not necessarily under authority and we'll see that later on because he ends up taking over the kingdom and
Persecuting his own father
Okay, and so cut your hair, you know, and and obviously, you know, the Bible doesn't give us a length. Okay
How long your hair should be so here's a good rule of thumb
To know if your hair's too long as a guy, okay
When you're walking away from someone do they have to question whether you're a guy or a girl?
Right, that's a good indicator
Because God wants distinction between man and a woman and part of that is our hair
You know now obviously we live in a day and age. We're like girls even get fades and stuff like that
Okay, those are the outliers
But you know if someone's wondering what you are from behind because of your hair that means it's time to cut it, okay
So this guy is like has long hair is obviously an indicator that he's not under authority
Says the verse 27 apps unto Absalom with her born three sons and one daughter whose name was Tamar
She was a woman of a fair counsel
So he named his daughter after his half sit or after his sister
Excuse me, so Absalom dwelled two full years in Jerusalem and saw not the king's face
Therefore Absalom sent for Joab to have sent him to the king
But he would not come to him and when he sent him again the second time he would not come
Therefore he said unto his servants see Joab's field is near mine and he had barley there
Go and set it on fire and Absalom's servants set the field on fire
So Absalom is just like asking for Joab. Hey, I want to see my dad
I want to see my dad and Joab just ignores him and he goes okay. I'll get your attention
He lights his field on fire and then finally Joab comes now. This is a good principle to learn here, okay?
Regarding conflict don't wait until your field is on fire
Right
You know you just just resolve it right away
If there's a little fire in your marriage
A little fire in your child rearing put it out immediately
Because then you might deal with the field of fire later on or you have no choice, but to actually address the situation
Okay
Then Joab arose verse 31 and came to Absalom unto his house and said unto him
Wherefore have thy servants set my field on fire and Absalom answered Joab behold
I send unto thee saying come hither that I may send thee to the king to say wherefore am I come from Geshur
It had been good for me to have been there still now therefore
Let me see the king's face and if there be any iniquity in me, let him kill me
So he's at a wits end. He's just like you know what?
If I've done wrong to just kill me, okay, and this goes back to the whole conflict thing
It's just like if parents don't say anything to their children
It's just like I wish you would just spank me already like just get it over with just do it right now
If I've done wrong
Punish me kind of thing
So Joab came to the king and told him and when he had called for
Absalom he came to the king and bowed himself on his face at the ground before the king and the king kissed Absalom and they
Live happily ever after no, they don't
Because although it looks like they've reconciled. It's been seven years
right
And now David is gonna reap the consequences of not resolving the conflict immediately
Outwardly it looks like everything's going well like okay, you know, he bowed himself before the king they're getting along David kisses him
reconciliation wrong
Because now Absalom has been brewing
Regarding all this situation. We're gonna see in the next chapter that he ends up usurping the authority and trying to take over the kingdom
Okay, very sad thing that's taking place here and David's family. Let us learn from this example folks
The greatest lesson that we can learn from this chapter is to resolve the conflicts in your marriage
immediately
Resolve the conflicts with your child with your children immediately resolve conflicts with one another immediately
Don't allow space to continue. Hey wives, if you're bitter towards your husband's go reconcile that immediately
don't just bottle it up and
Then you know you explode six months later and your husband was like wow
I thought we were happy, but apparently you've been thinking about this for a very long time
and
Then you know sometimes wives like why I didn't want to bother you
Yeah, but you're bottling it up though, and you're suppressing it and it's just gonna explode
So just go tell your husband what you need to tell him reconcile it right away and vice versa
You know husbands if you're upset at your wife or whatever if there's conflict go resolve it
Go take care of it life is too short my friends
To just be mad at your loved ones perpetually over some stupid little thing that you guys are fighting about. It's too short for that
We are God's people we have bigger fish to fry
And we need our marriages to be strong. We need our families to be strong
We need our church to be strong and that requires individuals within those
institutions to put out fires as soon as they start
Not until the field is on fire
Amen
Inspire heads and have a word of prayer father. We thank you so much for your word
Help us Lord as your people to resolve conflicts immediately Lord doesn't matter
How big it is and there might be a field on fire today, but we should try to put it out because
It could it could spread further and wider and destroy more resources and more lives
And so Lord help us as your people not to hold grudges or bitterness or anger
But that we would resolve things immediately Lord help us to be a people that practices this
Not just in our marriage not just with our children, but even with one another in a church setting and abroad Lord
We love you. We thank you pray these things in Jesus name. Amen
All right, we have one last song song number 37, there'll be no dark valley
Song 37
There'll be no dark valley
Everyone all together nice and strong
There'll be no dark valley
When Jesus comes there'll be no dark valley
When Jesus comes to gather his loved ones home
Together his loved ones home
To gather his loved ones home
There'll be no dark valley when Jesus comes to gather his loved ones home
There'll be no more sorrow when Jesus comes
But a glorious morrow when Jesus comes to gather his loved ones home
To gather his loved ones home
There'll be no dark valley when Jesus comes to gather his loved ones home
There'll be no more weeping when Jesus comes
But a blessed reaping when Jesus comes
To gather his loved ones home
There'll be no dark valley when Jesus comes to gather his loved ones home
There'll be songs of greeting when Jesus comes
And a joyful meeting when Jesus comes
To gather his loved ones home
There'll be no dark valley when Jesus comes
To gather his loved ones home