Now, in Titus chapter 1, the part that I wanted to focus on there is the part in verse number
13 where the Bible reads,
This witness is true, wherefore rebuke them sharply that they may be sound in the faith.
And what I want to preach about tonight is the subject of when to be nice and when not
to be nice.
Now there are a lot of people who think that we should just be nice all the time.
You should always be nice to every person no matter what the situation, just always
be nice.
That's not biblical because right here we see the Apostle Paul is telling Titus that
there are some people who need to be sharply rebuked and that's not nice.
But then other people often make the mistake of constantly being rude and abrasive when
it's not the right time to be rude and abrasive.
So I want to show you a lot of scriptures tonight just to help you to understand when
to be nice and when not to be nice.
First of all, let's look at this passage.
Let's look at this example, an example of when not to be nice.
It says in Titus 1 verse 9,
Holding fast the faithful word as he hath been taught, then he may be able by sound
doctrine both to exhort and to convince the gainsayers.
For there are many unruly and vain talkers and deceivers, specially they of the circumcision,
whose mouths must be stopped, who subvert whole houses, teaching things which they ought
not for filthy lucre's sake.
So let's get the context here of who we're talking about.
We're talking about people that are predominantly Jews, they're predominantly of the circumcision,
and these people are deceivers.
They are tricking people into believing false doctrine.
They are tricking people into believing something that's not biblical, that it is not of God.
And the Bible gives us the motive that these people have for being deceptive.
It says in verse 11,
At the latter part they are teaching things which they ought not for filthy lucre's sake.
Filthy lucre's sake means they're preaching lies for their own financial gain.
And he said that they subvert whole houses.
So they are succeeding at deceiving a lot of people.
They're leading a lot of people down a wrong path.
They're leading a lot of people straight to hell with their lying false doctrine and deception
and they're doing it all in the name of making money.
Now these people are pretty bad, aren't they?
I mean these are really bad people.
He says one of themselves, he's saying one of these false prophets, even a prophet of
their own, said the Cretans are always liars, evil beasts, slow bellies.
This witness is true, wherefore rebuke them sharply that they may be sound in the faith,
not giving heed to Jewish fables and commandments of men that turn from the truth.
Now when he says this witness is true, he's saying what I'm telling you right now is true,
that's really what they said.
He's not saying that the Cretans are really always liars, evil beasts, and slow bellies.
You see, if we get the context, the men who said this were of the circumcision.
And not only that, they were men who taught a lot of Jewish fables.
So these guys, as most of the Jews in the New Testament are, are people who think that
they are better than other nationalities.
I mean they think we're the Jews, we're wonderful, the Cretans, they're liars, they're evil beasts,
I mean they're calling them animals, because they're of a different nationality.
They're calling them beasts.
They're criticizing a whole group of people based on their nationality.
He says this witness is true, what I'm telling you is true, and because it's true, you need
to rebuke them sharply that they may be sound in the faith, and I believe that they there,
they may be sound in the faith, is the people that they're deceiving, that they'll be sound
in the faith when you, when you stop the mouths of these false prophets and deceivers.
He says, not giving heed to Jewish fables and commandments of men that turn from the
truth.
Under the pure, all things are pure.
The context here is referring to the fact that we should not call any nationality common
or unclean.
What's taught in the book of Acts, chapters 10 and 11.
It says, under the pure all things are pure, but under them that are defiled and unbelieving
is nothing pure, but even their mind and consciousness defiled, they profess that they
know God, but in works they deny them, being abominable and disobedient and under every
good work, reprobate.
So when we look at this chapter, it's clear, the people that he's telling him to rebuke
sharply, to harshly rebuke, are people who are evil, false prophets, deceivers, the love
of money has motivated them, and they are reprobates.
They are just, you're not going to change these people, right?
Okay, now go to 2 Timothy chapter 2, 2 Timothy chapter 2.
So in Titus chapter 1, we have a pretty clear example of when not to be nice.
Look at 2 Timothy chapter 2, let's see the Bible's teaching on when to be nice.
2 Timothy chapter number 2, it says in verse 23, but foolish and unlearned questions avoid,
knowing that they do gender strife.
He's saying look, stupid questions are just going to lead to dumb arguments about things
that don't matter.
So he says in verse 24, and the servant of the Lord must not strive but be gentle unto
all men, apt to teach, patient in meekness instructing those that oppose themselves,
if God peradventure, peradventure means maybe, if God peradventure will give them repentance
to the acknowledging of the truth, and that they may recover themselves out of the snare
of the devil who are taken captive by him at his will.
Now in this passage he's not telling us to rebuke people sharply.
He says in meekness, meekness is humility, meekness is deference, instructing, instructing
is teaching, in meekness instructing those that oppose themselves, if God peradventure
will give them repentance to the acknowledging of the truth.
What is he saying here?
People that disagree with right doctrine, people who are wrong about something, people
who are in the snare of the devil, it's not that they're the deceiver, they're the deceived.
They're in the snare of the devil, they're those who oppose themselves, they don't know
the truth.
God is saying, you know, instruct those people in meekness, don't fight with them, don't
strive with them, but be gentle to them because he's saying look, they might change what they
believe and agree with you.
So don't just write people off, he's saying, just because they're wrong on some doctrine,
don't jump down their throat, don't be rude to them, don't get angry with them, calmly,
gently, meekly, just try to teach them and help them to see the truth because maybe peradventure
they will repent and recover themselves out of the snare of the devil who are taken captive
by him at his will.
Go to Titus 3, a few pages to the right in your Bible, Titus chapter 3 verse 2, and we'll
see almost the same wording that we saw in 2 Timothy.
And look, remember, this is even within the same book.
In Titus 1 he's telling them people that they should not be nice to, and then in Titus 3
he says something different altogether.
Look at Titus 3 verse 2, to speak evil of no man, to be no brawlers, but gentle, showing
all meekness unto all men.
And then look what he says in verse 3, for we ourselves also were sometimes foolish.
He's saying look, in the past we were wrong about things too.
We had a lot of false doctrine in the past too before we knew better.
He says for we ourselves also were sometimes foolish, disobedient, deceived, serving divers,
lusts and pleasures, living in malice and envy, hateful and hating one another.
But after that the kindness and love of God our Savior toward man appeared, not by works
of righteousness which we have done, but according to his mercy he saved us by the washing of
regeneration and renewing of the Holy Ghost.
So look, we need to be careful that we're not just rude, angry, abrasive, and sharp
with people who are not evil, wicked, reprobate people that are setting out to deceive people
just to make money, but rather they're just people who are wrong on doctrine.
They're just not saved, they just haven't learned the truth, or they're just still learning.
And a lot of times, you know, people can be very rude and arrogant to them and then make
that person so mad that they never have the opportunity to talk to that person again.
Or that person will never come back to church again because you were so rude and abrasive
and harsh with them when they weren't a bad person.
And look, here's the thing, if you would have met me before I'd read the Bible cover
to cover, if you would have met me as a teenager being unlearned in the Scriptures, you know,
there are a lot of things that I would have been wrong with and that I would have been
wrong about, but would you have just jumped down my throat?
Would you have just, you know, tore into me and ripped my face and told me I'm an idiot
and a fool and all these things?
No.
Would you have declared me not to be saved just because I was ignorant on things?
No, you shouldn't, because when I later on read and studied and heard the preaching of
God's Word, I was corrected on many of those things.
So we need to be careful to differentiate between the evil, wicked, reprobate, false
prophet and false teacher, and the person who's just deceived, the person who's just
ignorant.
And be nice to them.
Look, when somebody walks through the door of our church that is wrong on doctrine, you
should be kind and gentle and nice to that person.
Now if somebody just comes in and they're just clearly just a false prophet, just clearly
entrenched and they're handing out stuff, denying the Gospel, denying the Trinity, you
know, denying salvation by faith, obviously that's the type of people he's warning in
Titus 1 that we need to rebuke sharply.
The false teacher, the false prophet, not the one who just believes differently because
you know what, that person might down the road change what they believe.
You know, there are many people that I thought would never change what they believe.
I thought about certain people, man, that person is just a liberal, they're always going
to be a liberal, you know, they're never going to change.
But then, lo and behold, you instruct that person, you teach that person in meekness,
you teach them.
And that's why the Bible says a man of God needs to be apt to teach, gentle, patient,
in meekness instructing those that oppose themselves because maybe God will give them
repentance acknowledging of the truth.
And so we need to be able to differentiate between those two things and not make the
mistake of being rude and arrogant and harsh when we should be nice.
Now you say, well, I'm just going to be nice to everybody just to be safe, you know, just
be, I'm just always going to be nice, I'm never going to be rude, I'm never going to
be harsh with anyone, I'm just going to be Mr. or Mrs. Sweetness and Light all the day
long to every single person I come into contact with.
But you know what, that's not biblical because the Bible commanded us to rebuke certain people
sharply.
There are many places in Scripture, for example, go to 2 John chapter 1.
2 John, there is only one chapter, but go to 2 John verse 9, right before Revelation
you have those short books there, 2 John, 3 John, Jude.
And there are times when we should not be nice.
I mean, you know, these false prophets that Titus was being warned about, he wasn't told
be nice to them, he was told rebuke them sharply.
Here in 2 John verse 9 it says, whosoever transgresseth and abideth not in the doctrine
of Christ, hath not God.
He that abideth in the doctrine of Christ, he hath both the Father and the Son.
If there come any unto you and bring not this doctrine, receive him not into your house,
neither bid him God speed, for he that biddeth him God speed is partaker of his evil deeds.
You know, when you're being too nice to somebody, hey, God bless you.
You say, well, how can you ever go wrong saying God bless you to anybody?
Because when you say God bless you to a false prophet, when you say God bless you to a false
teacher, when you say God speed, you are a partaker of his evil deeds and God commanded
you don't invite him into your house, don't bid him God speed, don't even say God bless
you to him.
Don't bless the covetous whom the Lord abhorreth.
That's what the Bible says.
So on and on we see examples of when we should be nice and when we should not be nice.
So therefore, somebody comes to my door from the Jehovah's false witnesses, somebody comes
to my door from the church of Latter-day Satan, okay?
When they come to my door, they are bringing lies, false doctrine, a false gospel, deception,
they're there for one reason.
To pervert the truth and to bring lying words and to damn the souls of everyone on my street.
That's what they're trying to do.
You say, well, they're sincere.
It doesn't matter if they're sincere.
They are false teachers and false prophets when they come to my door to preach me the
lies of Satan.
Therefore I will not invite them into my house.
I remember one time when I was a teenager, the Mormons came to my door and I invited
them into the house because I did not know the scripture and I invited them into the
house because my idea was I'm going to give them the gospel.
I'm going to talk to them and try to get them saved.
So I brought them in and sat them down in the living room and I started to go back and
forth with them and I was giving them the gospel and I was trying to reprove their false
doctrine and my dad got home and my dad just immediately kicked them out and he said don't
ever let them into this house again and he showed me this scripture.
I didn't know the scripture, but I was wrong to have invited them into the home.
I'm not going to offer them a drink of water.
You know, the Bible says if your enemy thirsts, give them a drink, if your enemy, okay, but
here's the thing, not a false prophet, the enemy of the cross of Christ who's coming
with lies and heresy.
That person should not be blessed.
Do we bless the unsaved?
Yes.
Do we bless people that are just unsaved, average Joe, deceived?
Yes, but we don't bless the deceiver.
We don't help the deceiver.
You know, they came to my sister's door, the Jehovah's false witnesses, and you say what's
wrong with these groups?
Look, the Jehovah's false witnesses, first of all, they have their own corrupted Bible
that just totally changes most verses called the New World Translation.
It's not a translation at all.
It's just them just changing things that they don't like.
I mean, they just insert things and take things out based on zero Greek or Hebrew manuscripts.
It's just their cult's false Bible, okay?
And they believe that Jesus is not God, that he's a created being, that he's Michael the
archangel, okay?
The Latter-day Satan, the Mormon church.
When they come, they teach that, you know, basically, on the surface it's like, oh, we
just want to talk about the Gospel of Jesus.
Okay, dig a little deeper.
They believe that there are people living on other planets right now and that if you
are a good Mormon, you'll get to create your own planet and be your own God.
It's just like what Satan tempted Eve with in the Garden of Eden.
You'll be like gods.
Okay, so these are very serious, damnable heresies that are being brought by these people.
These are not people that we should bless or be nice to or say Godspeed or give them
a drink of water or invite them into the home.
We should basically have nothing to do with them.
I won't even talk to them when they come to my house.
I just send them away and I tell them, I say, you are accursed of the Lord because you are
bringing a false Gospel, you know, and that's it.
I don't even talk to them when they come.
Now let's contrast that with, let's say I work, let's say I'm at work and I work with
a Mormon or I work with a Jehovah's Witness or I work with a Catholic.
You know, I'm not just going to rebuke that person and tell them that they're of Satan
because they're not coming to me bringing me a false doctrine.
They're not coming to me in the capacity of a false prophet.
They're just Joe Church member of the Mormons or Jehovah's Witness or Seventh-day Adventist
or Catholic or whatever other false religion, okay, or false perversion of Christianity.
You know, that person, I'm going to in meekness try to instruct that person, try to win them
to Christ, be gentle to them, be kind to them because you know what, that person might get
saved.
If I'm rude, if I'm arrogant, if I'm a jerk, you know what, they might not get saved because
they might just, whoa, you know, and they might just not even be interested in hearing
to what I say because the Bible says we're supposed to speak the truth in love, okay.
Look at Colossians chapter number 4, Colossians chapter number 4.
And here's the thing, you need to balance, a lot of things in the Bible have to do with
balance.
A lot of people, they take one part of the Bible and then they throw out another part,
meaning imbalance, okay.
And I'm not saying that we need to water down anything here, I'm saying we need to balance
the two teachings of the Bible here.
The Bible is teaching in some places to use sharpness, to rebuke them sharply.
In other places it's teaching gentleness and meekness.
We need to balance these two things and understand and believe both, okay, and understand the
difference between the scenarios being presented.
Now if you understand that the book of Colossians is a parallel book with the book of Ephesians,
you know we're talking about this a little bit as we go through Colossians on Wednesday
nights, then you'll know that chapter 4 of Colossians lines up with chapter 6 of Ephesians
on a lot of things.
Just like chapter 5 of Ephesians lines up with Colossians 3 on a lot of things, okay.
Well if you remember in Ephesians the famous passage where Paul talks about putting on
the whole armor of God, he talks about praying, and he says that he wants them to pray for
him and the request that Paul has for them to pray for him is he says, "...for me that
utterance may be given unto me, that I may open my mouth boldly to make known the mystery
of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in bonds, that therein I may speak boldly
as I ought to speak."
So Paul's saying I want you to pray for me that I would speak the word of God and preach
the gospel with boldness.
He says it twice, boldly with boldness, needs to be bold, but look at Colossians 4 verse
3, "...with all praying for us that God would open unto us a door of utterance."
Now that's the exact same thing he prayed for in Ephesians when he said, "...for me that
utterance may be given unto me."
He says, "...with all praying also for us that God would open unto us a door of utterance
to speak the mystery of Christ for which I am also in bonds."
Almost the same statement from Ephesians isn't it?
"...that I may make it manifest as I ought to speak."
So here instead of saying bold, he's saying I want to make it manifest, I want to be clear,
I don't want to beat around the bush.
You can see how that ties in with boldness.
Boldness is when you make things clear, you make it manifest, you just say what needs
to be said and don't try to hide it.
But look what he says next, "...walk in wisdom toward them that are without," meaning outside
the church, outside the faith.
He says, "...redeeming the time, let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with
salt, that you may know how you ought to answer every man."
So look, we can be bold and we can still let our speech be with grace.
We can still be gracious with people.
We can still have our speech be seasoned with salt without lacking boldness.
It's not like we have to choose between being bold and having grace and letting our speech
be always with grace, seasoned with salt.
We don't have to choose between being gentle and being bold, being meek and being bold.
Why?
A lot of people mistake rudeness, harshness, and arrogance for boldness.
You know, you have these phony preachers get up like a Peter Ruckman that basically just
gives fundamentalism a bad name for about a thousand different reasons, okay?
But you know, a guy like him gets up and just every other sentence is, you know, if you
don't believe like me, you're an idiot.
And if you don't understand this, you're stupid.
And if you don't do that, you're a fool.
And just constantly, just, you're dumber than a box of rocks, you're stupid, you're a moron,
you're a numbskull, you're a fool, and just constantly, and I've heard a lot of preachers
who do the same thing.
Okay, and look, and then people listen to that and just, wow, he's really bold.
What a bold, powerful, no, they're mixing up being a jerk with boldness.
When it's possible to be bold and preach just as hard without being a jerk, without alienating
good people.
Now look, there are bad people that need to be alienated.
You say, well isn't that what you do when you use words like faggot and queer?
I mean, you're alienating, look, those are wicked perverted reprobate.
See the difference is, why be nice?
Ask yourself this, why be nice?
Why did the Bible say to be nice?
Because maybe they'll recover themselves out of the snare of the devil.
Peradventure they will repent, peradventure they will be saved, okay?
That's why when he's talking about these deceiving reprobate false prophets, he's saying
look just rebuke them sharply, they're reprobate.
Same thing with these bunch of filthy homos, Romans 1 says they're reprobate, okay?
I don't mind alienating them, there's nothing you can do for them anyway, okay?
And that's a whole other sermon in and of itself, and a lot of people don't believe
in that, well read Romans 1, whatever, believe what you want, you don't have to agree with
me on that, I'm just telling you.
But see, I'm not going to sit there and just call everybody who disagrees with me on something
stupid or an idiot, because you know what, a lot of people, it's not that they're stupid,
it's not that they're an idiot, it's just that they're not saved.
See when you're not saved you can't understand the things of God, okay?
Now you say well, be nice to pedophiles, no.
Be nice to pedophiles, no!
You say, oh, be nice to the Pope, no!
Be nice to Joel Osteen, no!
These lying, reprobate deceivers, false prophets, child molesters, perverts, pedophiles, weirdos,
you know, these kind of people, the Bible never tells us to be nice to these kind of
people.
Okay, but here's the thing, do most people fall into any of those categories?
Because guess what, 90-some percent of people are not reprobate, 90-some percent of people
are not a false prophet or a false teacher, 90-some percent of people are not a homo,
despite watching Hollywood where it seems like one out of two people is a homo, okay?
You know, not, I mean the vast majority of people we're supposed to be nice to.
The vast majority of people we're supposed to be loving and kind and gentle and meek
and nice to them.
So we don't want to make the mistake of just, you know, let's say we read Matthew 23 where
Jesus is not being nice at all.
I mean was Jesus nice when he made a whip and chased people out of the temple with a
whip?
That wasn't nice.
Was Jesus nice when he called people fools, serpents, devils, rebuked them, hypocrites?
I mean look, Jesus is clearly not being nice in his sermon in Matthew 23 and many other
places.
But wait a minute, who is he talking to?
The Pharisees, the Sadducees, the lying false prophets, and he said, you shut up the kingdom
of heaven against men, you make people twofold more a child of hell as yourselves.
Why was he so angry?
Because they were taking people to hell.
Why are we angry at the homosexuals?
Because they're child molesters.
Why are we angry at Jeffrey Dahmer?
Why are we angry at people like Adolf Hitler or Stalin?
Why are we angry at people that hurt other people?
Because we love the innocent.
We love the souls that they're damning to hell with their lies and false doctrine.
Or we love the innocent people that they're murdering.
So you've got to understand here that when Jesus is talking about being sharp or harsh
with people or rebuking people harshly, he's not talking about your average, unsaved person.
And so a lot of times people that go to a church like ours will mistakenly read that
blistering sermon in Matthew 23 and just think that's how I need to talk to everybody who's
not saved.
But that is not how we talk to people that are not saved because we should be nice to
people that are not saved so that they can get saved and not just rip their face and
just yell at them and call them names and rebuke them and tell them off.
We need to kindly and gently instruct them and teach them.
Can everybody see the difference?
And sometimes it just blows my mind when people cannot understand this difference.
You'll try to preach to people that the Bible says that we should love our enemies.
Love your enemies.
Do good to those that hate you and persecute you.
But then people just translate that to love pedophiles, love rapists, love, no.
When the Bible's telling you to love your enemies, it's telling you to love your personal
enemies like people who do you wrong.
The guy who lies about you at work because he wants your promotion.
The guy who keys your car like somebody keyed our car in the parking lot this morning.
The guy who lies about you and maybe even physically assaults you or hits you or shoves
you or whatever.
We're supposed to love our enemies.
It doesn't mean that we're supposed to love those who hate the Lord.
Because the Bible says, shouldest thou help the ungodly or love them that hate the Lord?
Therefore is wrath upon thee from the Lord thy God?
The Bible said God's wrath can be upon you for loving those that hate the Lord and helping
the ungodly.
Well, I'm just going to be safe by just helping everybody and loving everybody.
No, the Bible says God's wrath was on King Jehoshaphat because he loved those who hated
the Lord and he helped the ungodly.
Because we have to understand the difference between loving people who hate God and who
harm innocent children or harm innocent people or damn innocent souls unto hell.
I mean, none of us are totally innocent, we're all sinners, but you know what I mean.
But here's what we've got though.
Love your enemies, meaning my personal enemies.
And you can say, whoa, but aren't those people your enemies too?
No.
It's not that they did me wrong.
It's that they are harming innocent people.
I mean, for example, people say that I'm hateful toward homosexuals.
I don't know where they got that, but maybe it's because I am.
But basically people will say like, oh, love your enemies.
But here's the thing, honestly, I can stand here right now and say this.
I'm 32 years old.
I have never had a homosexual harm me in any way or do anything.
I have no personal beef with any homo.
They've never done anything to me.
I mean, that's not why I hate them, because they molest children.
That's why I hate them.
I hate them because they're evil and they hate God.
The Bible says in Romans 1 that they're haters of God.
That's what it says.
That's why I hate them, because the Bible says, do not I hate them, O Lord, that hate
thee?
So if they hate the Lord, then I hate them.
Now does every unsaved person hate the Lord?
Do 90% of unsaved people hate the Lord?
No, the vast majority don't.
But do homosexuals, according to Romans chapter 1, hate the Lord?
Yes.
Okay, so it's not like I'm hating my enemies, because honestly, in a sense, they're not
my personal enemy at all, because like I said, none of them has ever really done anything
to me.
I just hate them because that's what the Bible says.
That's the only reason.
It's not like I have some personal beef or personal vendetta.
Now have there been people who physically harmed me or done me wrong?
Of course.
I mean, I was assaulted by the police for no reason, just because I wouldn't let them
search my car.
So in a sense, those are my enemies.
Those are people who just beat me up, tasered me for 22 seconds, when I wasn't even resisting?
22 seconds?
I mean, that's excessive.
Any of it's excessive.
But I mean, taser me for 22 seconds, beating me up, stepping on my head, you know, I had
to get 11 stitches in my head, but you know what?
Even in the back of the police car, I can honestly stand here and say that I prayed,
Father, forgive them, Lord, help them to be saved.
If they haven't heard the Gospel, I pray that someone would bring them the Gospel, Lord.
You know what?
It's not their, you know, maybe they're just ignorant, maybe they're just doing their job
or whatever.
And honestly, I can honestly say that I prayed for their salvation and prayed blessings upon
them.
Why?
Are they my friends?
No.
They're my enemies.
But I'm commanded by God to love my enemies and love those who harm me.
I've had people at work lie about me and I tried to be nice to those people and love
my enemies because that's what the Bible has commanded us to do.
It blows my mind when people don't see this distinction.
They think love your enemies means love everybody, including, you know, love Hitler.
You know, just love every mass murderer.
You know, love every wicked pedophile.
No.
And look, this is important to make this distinction to understand this.
So look, are there people to whom we should be rude, are there people to whom we should
answer sharply?
According to the Bible, yes.
Let me show you some more examples.
Look at Acts chapter 13.
And you say, well why preach on this sermon?
Honestly at our church, probably, you know, because there's two aspects to this sermon.
There's the be nice aspect and the don't be nice aspect.
I'm kind of going back and forth between the two.
Probably most people in our church have the don't be nice part down pretty well.
You know what I mean?
People at our church, they pretty much know like, okay, God, because basically anybody
who's ever even read the Bible should know that there are a lot of people that Jesus
and Paul and the apostles were not nice to.
I mean that's pretty obvious.
And I think most people in our church get that, but I have sometimes noticed a tendency
with some people in our church to be rude and abrasive and harsh with people who they
should have been nicer to.
And I'm not saying that I have never been guilty of this because I'm sure that there
have been plenty of times when I should have been nice and I wasn't that nice.
So don't just sit there and say, well Pastor Anderson, I saw you one time not be nice,
therefore you're a hypocrite.
Look, is Pastor Anderson did it as a good reason to do something?
Well Pastor Anderson did it so I'm going to do it too.
I mean if Pastor Anderson jumps off a cliff are you going to do that too?
Now look, I'm not saying that I'm a bad example or a bad leader, but I am saying that I'm
not perfect.
I'm not saying that you shouldn't be able to follow me as a leader, but let me say this
though.
I'm not saying that I've always been perfect in every situation that I've ever encountered.
So shouldn't you do what the Bible says?
I mean look, and people will call you a hypocrite, but honestly, what if I told a lie in my life
and then I preach against lying, does that make me a hypocrite?
Because if I've lied once, does that mean I can never preach against lying again without
being a hypocrite?
I mean think about that.
I mean if that were the case I'd only be able to preach against a few sins.
I can only preach about stuff that I've never done.
So I can preach against adultery, murder, and suicide, sodomy, I can preach against
what else have I never done?
But I guess I can never preach against lying because I've lied.
I guess I can never preach against stealing because I've stolen.
I guess I can never preach against coveting because I've coveted.
I mean look, that's a really foolish logic.
So obviously if I'm just saying one thing and doing another, yeah that's bad.
But if I'm saying one thing and doing that to the best of my ability, but I'm not perfect,
that doesn't make me a hypocrite.
So honestly I can stand here and say, I do strive to be nice to people that are not complete
reprobates or people that are not bringing me false gospel and false doctrine.
I do try to be nice and I usually succeed at being nice to people in that category.
So I'm not being a hypocrite here.
But that being said, I'm sure that there are examples of times when I should have been
nice and I wasn't.
There might have been times when I was too nice.
I should have been meaner, you know, I don't know.
I'm just saying.
So don't just sit there and say, well you know, well one time I saw Pastor Anderson
just really blow up at somebody.
So therefore every time I'm in a similar situation, I'm going to do the same thing.
Let's go by the principles of the Bible that I'm showing you here to decide who to be nice
to and who not to be nice to.
Not just something that you saw Pastor Anderson do one time.
Somebody came in here and brought false doctrine.
One time this guy came in here, this long haired hippie came in here and told me that,
and rebuked me for having children.
Because I have way too many children and the earth's overpopulated and all this stuff.
It made me upset, it made me angry.
So I was trying to be nice to him and explain to him that he's wrong and I was being kind
to him, but the guy just kept pushing it further and further.
Pretty soon the guy's telling me that China's one child policy is wonderful, where they
force women to have abortion if they have a second child, and he's just basically saying
that my children should be dead.
Then I cursed him in the name of the Lord and sent him on his merry way and told him
to never come back.
Because it was so obvious how evil he was.
He was just pure evil coming in here just wanting my children dead, praising Communist
China's one child policy of forced sterilization and forced abortion.
At that point it became clear, this guy's a very evil person coming in and bringing
this horrible thing.
And he was doing it all claiming the name of Christ, claiming to be a Bible-believing
Christian.
See what I mean?
So it was like, no.
He needed to be rebuked sharply because honestly when I talked to my wife about it, you know
what her biggest concern was when I came home and told my wife?
Was like, well I hope you really were harsh with the guy.
Because she said she just doesn't want to see that guy ever come back again.
So she just said, I just hope that you, and I said, oh believe me baby, I was.
I said, he won't be back, I can promise you that.
So there's something, look at Acts 13, Acts 13 verse 7 says this, which was the deputy
of the country, Sergius Paulus, a prudent man who called for Barnabas and Saul and desired
to hear the word of God.
So here's a guy, Sergius Paulus, he wants to hear God's word.
He wants to hear the Gospel, but Elimus the sorcerer, for so is his name by interpretation
withstood them, seeking to turn away the deputy from the faith.
So here's the deputy, Sergius Paulus, he wants to hear the Gospel, Paul is trying to give
him the Gospel and this evil sorcerer, Elimus, is trying to stop this guy from getting saved.
Have you ever been given somebody the Gospel and somebody comes in and tries to stop you
and tries to work for Satan in that capacity?
Then Saul, who also is called Paul, filled with the Holy Ghost.
So is he in the flesh here, losing his temper in the flesh?
No this guy, he's filled with the Spirit.
He's filled with the Holy Ghost and the Bible tells us that for a reason.
Set his eyes on him and said, O full of all subtlety and all mischief, thou child of the
devil, thou enemy of all righteousness, wilt thou not cease to pervert the right ways of
the Lord?
Let me ask you this, was that nice?
Is he being nice?
Is he being gentle?
Is he being patient?
No, he's rebuking him sharply, he's rebuking him harshly.
And it says in verse 11, Now behold, the hand of the Lord is upon thee, and thou shalt be
blind, not seeing the sun for a season.
And immediately there fell on him a mist and a darkness, and he went about seeking some
to lead him by the hand.
Then the deputy, when he saw what was done, believed, being astonished at the doctrine
of the Lord.
What was he astonished about?
Was he astonished at the miracle?
The Bible says he was astonished at the doctrine of the Lord.
The word of God is what astonished him the most.
So what we see here is a story that's pretty similar to what we see in Titus.
He's a false prophet, he's a deceiver.
He's reprobate because he's calling him a child of the devil, which is a term used about
people that are reprobate.
Like when Jesus told the Pharisees, you're of your father the devil, okay?
And he's not being nice, he's rebuking him sharply.
Just to quickly go through some of these, you don't have to turn there, but in Galatians
Paul says, if any man brings another gospel, let him be accursed.
That's not nice.
Go to 1 Corinthians 13, 1 Corinthians chapter 13.
And while you're turning there, let me read for you from 2 Corinthians 13, because in
2 Corinthians 13, Paul says, therefore I write these things being absent, lest being present
I should use sharpness according to the power which the Lord has given me to edification
and not to destruction.
So in that verse he says, look, my goal is not to destroy but to edify.
And he says I would prefer not to use sharpness.
So Paul's desired way of approaching this, and his default is he wants to be nice.
And he says, look, I don't want to have to use sharpness, but if I need to, I will.
He's saying, look, I want to edify, I don't want to destroy, I want to be kind, I don't
want to use sharpness.
But he's saying, look, I will use sharpness.
And that's why later on, you know, in another place he says to them, you know, what wilt
thou?
Do you want me to come to you in meekness, or do you want me to come with the rod?
I mean, what's it going to be?
He didn't want to be mean, he wanted to be nice.
And we should want to be nice, we should strive to be nice, we should try to be gentle and
patient and live as much as is possible peaceably with all men.
Are there certain opportunities when we should be harsh or rebuke sharply?
Yes, but that should be reserved for reprobates, pedophiles, rapists, false prophets, false
teachers, deceivers, people who are purposely bringing a perverted doctrine.
That's who we should treat with harshness.
Those are the people that we should not handle with white gloves.
Where did I have eternal?
1 Corinthians 13.
Here's a passage on being nice, 1 Corinthians 13 verse 2.
And though I have the gift of prophecy and understand all mysteries and all knowledge,
and though I have all faith so that I could remove mountains and have not charity, I am
nothing.
Now, I am nothing is a pretty strong statement.
I don't want to be a nothing.
And so he's saying, look, you can have a lot of good things going for you.
You can be a great preacher, you can understand the Bible well, but if you don't have charity,
you're nothing.
He says, and though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body
to be burned and have not charity, it profited me nothing.
So charity is pretty important, isn't it?
Well let's keep reading.
Charity suffereth long and is kind.
That means it puts up with a lot.
Charity envieth not, charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, doth not behave
itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, and look at this, is not easily provoked.
Does it say it's never provoked?
No.
But it says it's not easily provoked.
Thinketh no evil, rejoiceth not iniquity but rejoiceth in the truth.
So what we see here is that if we are going to be charitable, which God wants us to be,
then it's critical that we're charitable or else we're nothing.
He says, look, be kind, suffer long, don't be puffed up, don't be arrogant with people,
and he says don't behave yourself unseemly, and don't be easily provoked.
That means you don't just blow up and get angry at the job, you know, what in the world,
you know, just because somebody disagrees with you on some minor doctrinal point, or
maybe even somebody's just not saved and they're wrong on salvation, they're wrong
on the Gospel, and somebody just says, well I don't, let's give an example.
Let's say you're at work, right, and you've got somebody that doesn't believe that Jesus
is God.
I mean, isn't that a major heresy?
Right.
But if it's just an, it's not like they're just this false prophet, false teacher on
a crusade against the deity of Christ, they've just been deceived by a false religion.
Somebody says, well I don't think Jesus is God, I don't believe Jesus is God.
You know, you child of the devil, you know, you wilt thou not cease to perverse the right
ways of the Lord, you pervert, you be accursed.
Wouldn't it make more sense to just gently, kindly, mercifully open the Bible and try
to exhort this person and teach them that Jesus is God?
Or, you know, somebody at work, or when you're out sowing, knocking on the door, whatever.
You run into a relative here that believes that, you know, you can lose your salvation.
You are a heretic, you're a false teacher, you know, you are going to split hell wide
open.
It would make more sense to just open the Bible and try to show that person the truth
as nicely as possible of what the Bible says.
Okay, do you see what I'm saying?
Now if somebody comes into our church and they're bringing in lies and heresy, okay,
I understand that person needs to be sent.
They need to be rebuked, they need to be kicked out, I understand.
But do you see a huge difference between those two scenarios?
So we need to use discernment here and discretion and use what the Bible says here as a rule
of thumb.
All these examples, look, go to Matthew 23 and I'll close on this, Matthew 23.
Also toward believers, the Bible says in Galatians 6, 1, Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a
fault, ye which are spiritual restore such an one in a spirit of meekness, considering
thyself lest thou also be tempted.
So he's talking about kindly helping someone get back into soul winning maybe, get back
into church maybe, get out of sin that they're in, whatever the case may be, okay.
And not to just at the drop of a hat just angrily, harshly, rudely lay into somebody
who's just wrong on something or living in sin or whatever.
You know, let's try to be nice to people and try to kindly get them to fix the problem.
And by the way, you should also apply kindness and being nice to your own family.
How about your husband?
How about your wife?
How about your children?
Yeah, but they're wrong.
Yeah, but should you just scream at them and call them names and be mean and abrasive all
the time when you could accomplish the same thing by being nice?
Bible says in Matthew 23, I mean, you know, hopefully your family's not reprobated.
You know what I mean?
They're like, why are you using that kind of methodology with them?
They're not bringing you a false gospel just because they spilled their milk, okay.
There's no use crying over spilled milk, you know, and yet people spill milk and a lot
of screaming and yelling takes place sometimes.
But anyway, look if you would at Matthew 23.
Here's an example of not being nice.
Verse 13, but woe unto you scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites, for you shut up the kingdom of
heaven against men, for you neither go in yourselves, neither suffer them that are entering
to go in.
Now look, who is he being rude to here?
Who is he calling out?
Who is he harshly rebuking and calling hypocrites?
People who are causing other people to go to hell.
That's what it says in this verse.
They are responsible for someone going to hell.
That's not somebody who's just a little off on their doctrine.
Somebody who, you know, just makes a mistake or does you wrong at work.
I mean these are really bad people.
Woe unto you scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites, for you devour widow's houses and for a pretense
make long prayer.
Therefore shall you receive the greater damnation.
Woe unto you scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites, for you can pass sea and land to make one
proselyte and when he is made you make him twofold more the child of hell than yourselves.
Look at verse 17, ye fools and blind.
I mean that's a pretty harsh thing to say, isn't it?
Look at verse 19, ye fools and blind.
Verse 23, woe unto you scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites.
Verse 24, ye blind guides.
Verse 25, woe unto you scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites.
Verse 26, thou blind Pharisee.
Verse 27, woe unto you scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites, for you're like unto whited sepulchres,
which indeed appear beautiful outward but are within full of dead men's bones and of
all uncleanness.
Verse 33, ye serpents, ye generation of vipers, how can ye escape the damnation of hell?
He's not being nice, but he's speaking to religious leaders who should have known better.
It's not that they've never heard, it's not that they're ignorant, they've already chosen
to go with Satan.
I mean they've just rejected the truth, they've rejected the gospel, they've rejected God's
word and chosen to be on the side of Satan for filthy lucre's sake and Jesus Christ is
not nice to them.
But look how many times Jesus is confronted with publicans and sinners and he's nice to
them.
Even people who were very sinful people, women who'd been married five different times, right?
She'd had five husbands and she's living with a man that's not her husband.
I mean to a woman who was a prostitute, to a woman who'd been demon-possessed in the
past, to men who were tax collectors and publicans and just ungodly people, he was nice.
Why?
Because they weren't wicked, evil, reprobate deceivers, they were just unsaved people,
they're just sinful people.
They were deceived.
And there was a chance that peradventure they could be saved, that they could turn unto
Christ and that they would hear the gospel and get saved.
So we need to balance these two things.
I've gone back and forth in the sermon, I've showed you examples of being nice, I've showed
you examples of not being nice.
But look, even though there are a lot of examples of not being nice, let me say this, 90-some
percent of the time you need to be nice.
Because most people are not deceiving, reprobate, false prophet, wicked, just people that are
just purveyors of evil.
So honestly, be careful that you're not just getting mad, and sometimes you know what,
your heart's in the right place, but you just get zealous and you just get too abrasive
with people.
You catch more flies with honey.
And the Bible says we're to be fishers of men.
Let's be nice.
There's nothing wrong with being nice.
And over and over again the Bible tells us to be meek, humble, kind, gentle, patient,
friendly.
Those are all good attributes to have.
Don't be a jerk for the sake of being a jerk.
If someone tries to abuse your children, be a jerk.
If someone tries to teach you false doctrine and lies and indoctrinate your children with
heresy, be a jerk.
If a man comes to your door wearing a dress, be a jerk.
But look, honestly, 90-some percent of people are never going to be like that.
And so 90-some percent of the time we just need to be nice.
Are there occasions not to not be nice?
Yes, but use the Bible to justify it and say, okay, here's an example of somebody that I
was told by the Bible to rebuke sharply.
Here's an example of someone that I was told not to bid Godspeed.
That I was told not to help.
That I was told not to love.
But it's a very small group that we would feel that way about.
So try to learn to be nice the rest of the time.
Let's bow your heads and have a word of prayer.
Father, thank you so much for what you've taught us in your word.
And Lord, there are a lot of people who don't understand the things that I've preached tonight
and honestly I'm not going to be a jerk to them.
I'm going to be nice to them and explain it to them.
There are a lot of people who probably certain things in my sermon tonight they think, oh
man, I can't believe you said that about homosexuals.
You know, God, I realize it's just because they haven't read Romans 1 or memorized it
like I have.
They probably just, you know, don't know.
And so God, you know, help us to be nice to people.
Just because they don't agree with us doesn't mean they're bad people.
And Lord, please just help us to discern and make a difference between the deceiver and
the deceived.
You know, the reprobate and the one who's just unsaved.
Help us to love the unsaved and the lost and try to get them saved.
And to bless those who curse us, but not to bless those who hate the Lord.
And in Jesus' name we pray.