Man, the title of my sermon tonight is, Taking No for an Answer, Taking No for an Answer.
We'll come back to Deuteronomy chapter number one, but if you would flip over to Matthew
chapter number 10, Taking No for an Answer.
All throughout the Bible we have examples of people who refused to take no for an answer
or people who did take no for an answer.
There are times in our life when we need to take no for an answer, okay?
Now the first area that I want to touch on, I'm going to hit on a whole bunch of different
things, there are so many different Bible stories that tie in with this truth, but first
I want to talk about out-soul winning.
You know, when you go out-soul winning and you're offering people a chance to hear the
Gospel, if they say no, take no for an answer, okay?
Don't force anyone to listen that doesn't want to listen.
If you would look at Matthew chapter number 10, verse 7, the Bible reads, and as you go
preach saying the kingdom of heaven is at hand.
Look at verse 14, and whosoever shall not receive you nor hear your words when you depart
out of that house or city, shake off the dust of your feet.
Verily I say unto you, it shall be more tolerable for the land of Sodom and Gomorrah in the
day of judgment than for that city.
Flip back to chapter 7 and I'll read for you from Mark where it says, whosoever shall not
receive you nor hear you when you depart then shake off the dust of your feet for a testimony
against them.
Verily I say unto you, it shall be more tolerable for Sodom and Gomorrah in the day of judgment
than for that city.
Boy, it sounds like there's a pretty serious punishment for those who reject the Gospel
when it's brought to them on a silver platter, I mean when the apostles of Jesus Christ showed
up in a town or a city or at someone's door and they preached the Gospel of Jesus Christ.
If people refused to hear it, if people rejected them, he said they were getting a worse punishment
than Sodom and Gomorrah.
So that's a pretty major punishment because when Peter, James and John and men of that
caliber are showing up at your house, you better listen, right?
When Jesus Christ himself walked on this earth and he taught and preached amongst them for
three and a half years, well rejecting that was just the most damning thing that they
could possibly do and it got them a worse punishment than Tyre and Zidane and Sodom
and Gomorrah and Babylon and all those kind of places because they're face to face with
Jesus.
They faced with the apostles the best soul winners ever and they didn't get saved.
So here's the thing, they were told if you go preach to somebody, if they don't want
to hear you, just shake the dust off your feet.
That's a symbolic gesture that means you know what, fine, I'm out of here, see you later.
Not even letting the dust of your feet cleave unto you is a sign that basically you're just
completely walking away.
You're not leaving any connection between you and them, you're just saying, all right,
I'm gone, see you later, okay.
Now what he's basically telling them to do is to take no for an answer and if you look
at Matthew chapter 7 verse 6, there's a similar teaching, it says, give not that which is
holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under
their feet and turn again and rend you.
Why waste time talking to somebody who doesn't want to listen, who doesn't want to hear,
who's not receptive?
Don't cast your pearls before swine.
What you have is valuable and it's a limited commodity.
Why?
Because your time is limited.
The gospel that you carry is the most precious treasure that there is and you're there with
that treasure but you don't have an unlimited amount because you don't have the time to
knock every single door in Arizona yourself, every single door in Tempe yourself.
You only have a certain amount of time, maybe you have an hour or two hours or maybe it's
a big soul winning event and you might have four or five hours but you still have a limited
amount of time so don't waste it.
Don't waste that treasure.
Don't cast your pearls before swine.
Don't give that which is holy unto the dogs.
You know, when I first started out soul winning, I didn't understand this concept about not
taking no for an answer.
So when I started out soul winning, I didn't even ask people if they wanted to hear the
gospel.
I would basically just start giving them the gospel.
You know, I would just ask them if they went to church, ask them if they knew for sure
they're going to heaven and then I would just start giving them the gospel and sometimes
I'd see people kind of squirming and kind of looking for a way out of this conversation
and I just figured, you know, I'm just going to keep preaching to them until they tell
me to leave or until they tell me to stop, until they just give me a clear just, no,
we don't want to hear it.
But you know what I found is I was wasting a lot of time because I found that the people
that had no interest didn't end up getting saved.
So here I would stand for 10, 15 minutes preaching the gospel to people who are zoned out, they're
not paying attention, they don't care, they're not interested.
I'm wasting my breath, I'm wearing out my throat, I'm wasting my time and I figured
out after a while, you know, I'd rather ask someone if they want to hear the gospel because
then I'm going to spend my time, energy and breath on people who actually want to hear
the gospel and then they're more likely to get saved.
Now occasionally, yeah, you might get somebody saved cramming it down their throat but you're
going to waste so much time, it's not worth it and it's not what the Bible taught.
I mean, God says, look, don't cast your pearls before swine.
If they don't want to receive you, if they don't want to hear your words, just shake
off the dust of your feet and go to the next door.
Now look, if someone doesn't want to hear the gospel, I still think it's great to leave
them with one verse, right?
Just, hey, is it all right if I just leave you with one verse real quick?
Leave them with that verse, expound a little something about that verse, put the YouTube
card in their hand, you know, put the invitation to church in their hand, maybe exhort them
to go online and watch the Bible Way to Heaven video, it's only eight minutes long.
You know, when you get a chance, just check out the short video.
That's all fine and dandy but don't spend 10, 15, 20 minutes cramming the gospel down
somebody's throat who doesn't want to hear it because you're just wasting your time.
You're not accomplishing anything.
Learn to take no for an answer, and by the way, be polite when you take no for an answer,
out soul winning.
You know, when I'm out soul winning and somebody says, no thanks, I'm not interested, I say,
all right, have a great day, God bless you, see you later.
I don't just, oh really, seriously, but I've been out soul winning with people and that
is how they acted.
When someone told them, no, I'm busy, oh, you're busy, huh, really, is that why you
got a video game controller in your hand, you know?
So they always would just kind of look real downcast or just act like the person was an
idiot.
Now, look, obviously the person's an idiot for rejecting the gospel but don't act like
they're an idiot, all right, because of the fact that they don't know what they do.
Forgive them for they know not what they do.
They might not be at a point in their life right now where they understand the importance
of salvation and the thing about our church is that we're doing so much soul winning,
we're very likely to talk to that person again.
It's not like you knocking their door is their only chance, it's their last chance, they're
going to go straight to hell if they don't get saved today.
The chances are, because we have 200 and some people out soul winning every week, chances
are that door is going to get hit again.
You know, most neighborhoods we hit repeatedly and even if we don't hit that neighborhood
repeatedly people move around or, you know, sometimes we run into people in other neighborhoods.
I personally have run into the same people out soul winning a bunch of times over the
last 13 and a half years just reap where I'm like, I remember this person, I recognize
this person even in neighborhoods where we've never knocked because they move around or
they just happen to be there.
So it's not necessarily that person's last chance so you don't want to leave them on
a sour note where you're rude to them and unkind to them.
It's better to be friendly, leave the card, have a great day and then, you know, maybe
later they will jump on YouTube and watch that Bible Way to Heaven video.
People do watch that stuff.
You know, I think it's Pastor Manley Perry, one of our pastor friends, he's got a card
that has a link to the Bible Way to Heaven but somehow he has it set up to where he gets
analytics of how many people followed that particular link to watch that particular video.
And so he had some statistics that when they went soul winning for a year it was like hundreds
of people had followed that link to watch that video.
I don't remember what the numbers were but it showed that people do watch it.
You know, people do look at it and so you can leave them with that, leave them on a
good note so that the next guy who comes along, they're not going to be already mad because
they remember how the last guy treated them, right?
So treat people well, be kind and just take no for an answer.
And you know what?
They're doing you a favor when they tell you I'm not interested because, you know, I'd
rather have somebody tell me that they're not interested than to just be not interested
and I'm talking to them for 10 minutes and it's just like wah wah, wah wah, wah wah wah
and they don't hear anything I'm saying.
That's a waste of everybody's time, right?
So take no for an answer when you're out soul winning.
Go back to Deuteronomy chapter number one.
People that don't take no for an answer are typically bad people and I'm going to get
into a lot of examples of this but it's a really bad attribute when no one can tell
you no, okay?
And this starts with children, right?
Their parents tell them no and they don't listen as we talked about this morning, obeying
your parents.
But children need to learn that when their parents say no, it's no, all right?
When God says no, it's no, all right?
And I'm going to go into a whole bunch of examples of this but in Deuteronomy chapter
one, we have the story where the children of Israel are supposed to go in and take the
promised land.
God has promised them this land flowing with milk and honey.
The idea was to leave Egypt and then go into the promised land, right?
Well, they end up not having the faith necessary to go into the promised land and so it says
in verse number 34 because they had complained and they didn't want to go into the promised
land.
They didn't believe that they could do it.
They didn't believe God would do it for them.
The Lord heard the voice of your words and was wroth and swear saying, surely there shall
not one of these men of this evil generation see that good land which I swear to give unto
your fathers save Caleb the son of Jephunneh.
He shall see it and to him will I give the land that he had trodden upon unto his children
because he had wholly followed the Lord.
Look at verse 40, but as for you, turn you and take your journey into the wilderness
by the way of the Red Sea.
Then he answered and said unto me, we have sinned against the Lord.
We will go up and fight according to all that the Lord our God commanded us.
That's not what he commanded them.
He commanded them, go to the Red Sea.
That ship had already sailed of, hey, let's go fight and take the land.
So they murmured, they complained, they sent in the 12 spies if you remember, 10 were bad,
two were good.
Joshua and Caleb gave the good report, the 10 spies gave the bad report, they believed
the 10 spies, they cried, they whined about it and then God got angry.
And what God actually ended up doing was he killed the 10 spies.
So when the 10 spies fell over dead, that's when they realized we're wrong here.
God's killing people, okay, that spoke against this.
So now they're changing their mind and saying, hey, let's go up and take the land.
Let's go into the, we're going to do it, we're really sorry, God, we're ready to fight now.
And God said, no, you know, that ship has already sailed, look what the Bible says.
And when you had girded on every man his weapons of war, verse 41, ye were ready to go up into
the hill and the Lord said unto me, say unto them, go not up neither fight, for I am not
among you lest ye be smitten before your enemies.
So I spake unto you and ye would not hear, but rebelled against the commandment of the
Lord and went presumptuously up into the hill and the Amorites which dwelt in that mountain
came out against you and chased you as bees do and destroyed you in sere even unto Horma.
And ye returned and wept before the Lord, but the Lord would not hearken to your voice
nor give ear unto you.
So here we see that when they're told to go into the land, they won't go in the land.
And then when they're told, okay, now don't go in the land, okay, let's go into the land.
These are people who just won't take no for an answer.
Whatever God tells them to do, they're doing the opposite, a stiff necked, disobedient,
stubborn people.
And this is what it means to not take no for an answer, it's to be stubborn, it's to be
obstinate, right, to just refuse to take no for an answer.
And so Moses ends up being in a similar situation where he's told by God, you're not going into
the promised land.
But we see Moses taking no for an answer, right?
When Moses told, hey, you're not going to go into the promised land, but Joshua is going
to go in the promised land, and he tells him, encourage Joshua, build him up, set him up
to go in, Moses does that.
And when God takes him up in the mountain to die in the mountain, he shows him the promised
land, but he dies.
Moses takes no for an answer, Moses is blessed, the children of Israel refuse, and they get
destroyed.
And you know, the children of Israel, they do the same thing also in the book of Jeremiah.
It's the same thing.
Like in Jeremiah, he's preaching to them saying, you need to leave Jerusalem, you need to go
to the Chaldeans, you need to fall away the Chaldeans, and then you'll be okay.
If you get out of the city and go to them, you'll be fine.
Of course, they refuse to do that, they stay in Jerusalem, and then they get attacked,
and then they get wiped out.
And then they're all of a sudden, oh, let's flee now, too late, they get wiped out.
Then the remnant is told, okay, they're told the opposite, now you got to stay in Jerusalem
now.
Don't leave, stay here and you'll be fine.
No, we're going down to Egypt.
And then they go down to Egypt, and they all get wiped out, okay?
We need to obey God's word, and when he tells us no, we need to take no for an answer.
When mom and dad tell us no, when authorities tell us no, even when we want to go soul winning
and people don't want to, just be a person who is willing to take no for an answer when
it's appropriate, and not just a stubborn person who always has to have your way all
the time.
You know, you think about the children of Israel, they were supposed to keep the law,
right?
They were supposed to keep the Sabbath, and they were supposed to do all those dietary
rules and all those laws.
And you know what, they didn't keep the law, they constantly failed at keeping the law.
You know, Stephen said, you received the law by the disposition of angels and you have
not kept it.
But now, in the New Testament, when they're not supposed to keep the law, boy, that's
all they want to do, is keep the law, right?
Now that the law has been nailed to the cross, now that the cardinal ordinances are done
away, now that the dietary restrictions are gone, now that the Sabbath is Christ, now
all of a sudden, boy, they don't want to work on that Saturday anymore, do they?
See how stubborn they are?
As were their fathers, so are they.
Just they won't go when he says go, they won't stay when he says stay.
Keep the law, they won't keep it.
Okay, don't do the law.
The law is done.
Oh, let's do it.
And you know these Hebrew roots people, they selectively do the Torah.
Everything we're not supposed to do, they do it.
But then the stuff that we should still do, they don't do that stuff.
So I mean, it's just they literally do the exact opposite of what God commands.
What is it?
It is stubbornness.
Go to 2 Corinthians chapter 12, 2 Corinthians chapter 12, the Bible says, for rebellion
is the sin of witchcraft, and stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry.
Because thou hast rejected the word of the Lord, he hath also rejected thee from being
king.
So what I just read for you is from 1 Samuel chapter 15 verse 23, you're turning to 2 Corinthians,
it's about King Saul.
King Saul is told no.
King Saul messed up, he sinned against the Lord, and he's being stubborn about it.
And the prophet rebukes him and says, look, stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry.
Rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft.
But Saul won't take no for an answer.
He's told, hey, you're not going to be king anymore.
Did he accept that?
Did he say, you know what, yeah, I messed up.
Time for me to step down from being king.
And let's have David take over.
That's the Lord's anointed.
Well, he never accepted that.
Because all the way to the end, he's doing what?
Pursuing David, trying to kill David.
Whenever Jonathan would speak up for David, he told off Jonathan, now son of the perverse
and rebellious woman, don't you know you've chosen the son of Jesse to your own confusion
and to the confusion of your mother's nakedness.
He's chewing out his son for basically realizing what God had said that David is going to be
the next king, that David is the Lord's anointed, and that the spirit of the Lord has departed
from Saul.
Saul's not going to be king.
Why didn't Saul just accept that?
His life could have ended so much better if he would have just accepted, okay, I'm not
king anymore.
That's okay.
I can still love God.
I can still serve God.
I still have a great family.
Maybe I can still have an important place in David's kingdom.
He still could have been a great warrior, a great leader.
He just couldn't be king.
He should have just gracefully stepped down.
But what does he do?
He just digs in.
And what does he turn into as a result of not taking no for an answer?
Turns into a murderer.
He turns into somebody who goes to a witch.
And he does all these horrible things, and he ends up dying in shame, committing suicide,
and just being a byword.
I mean, Saul's not a popular baby name just because of the fact that Saul is not a character
that most people would lift up as being a great guy, even though he started out great,
even though he did some great things.
In general, we think of Saul as a negative Bible character.
If you say that someone's like King Saul, it's typically not a compliment.
Typically you're saying something negative about that person.
And so Saul's another example of this.
Now here's an example in 2 Corinthians 12 of the apostle Paul, who took no for an answer.
Look what the Bible says in verse 7, unless I should be exalted above measure, through
the abundance of the revelations, there was given to me a thorn in the flesh, the messenger
of Satan to buffet me, lest I should be exalted above measure.
For this thing I besought the Lord thrice, or three times, that it might depart from
me.
And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee, for my strength is made perfect
in weakness.
Look at Paul's reaction to being told no.
He has a prayer request, he asks three times, God explains to him, no, my grace is sufficient
for you, my strength is made perfect in weakness.
This thorn in the flesh is there to buffet you so that you won't be exalted above measure,
it's my will, it needs to be there.
We don't know exactly what the thorn in the flesh was, but whatever this negative, painful
thing was in Paul's life, it had to be there to balance out all the revelations he's being
given so that he won't get too exalted or puffed up or prideful.
And so Paul's reaction is this, most gladly.
That should have been Saul's reaction, right?
Most gladly will I turn the kingdom over to David.
Most gladly will I give the kingdom unto whoever the Lord chooses, whoever the Lord annoys.
Hey, you want us to go to the Red Sea now, Lord?
Okay, we can't go on the promised land.
Most gladly will we do so.
He said most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities that the power of
Christ may rest upon me.
Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches and necessities and persecutions,
and distresses for Christ's sake, for when I am weak, then am I strong, right?
So what happens when we have a most gladly attitude, right?
When we're told no by God, when we're told no by authority, and we have the most gladly
type attitude, here's what happens.
Usually God will be merciful to us, bless us, and things will go better than we think
that they're going to go, okay?
I can't even count how many times I've told my children no, they asked me for something,
and I tell them no, and when they take it gracefully, it just makes me want to do it
for them.
If I tell them no about something, and they're just like, okay, sure, no problem, then I
think like, maybe we can't do that.
I mean, I literally did that in the last 36 hours, okay?
But when you tell them no, you can't have that, and oh, man, what are you talking about?
Eh, you know, that's not fair, whatever.
You know, then it makes you not want to do it, because you want them to learn to take
no for an answer.
And when they take no for an answer, oftentimes the decision will even be reversed.
Let me give you an example of this also from scripture, Nineveh.
And I love this example, and this is something I think about almost every week of my life,
and I just wish that everybody would understand this concept that we learned from the Book
of Jonah.
It's an important concept of taking no for an answer, because God says to Nineveh, through
Jonah his prophet, yet 40 days, and Nineveh shall be overthrown.
Did he say it might be overthrown?
He said, in 40 days, Nineveh shall be overthrown.
You know, it doesn't sound like there's any hope there.
It doesn't even sound like there's anything they can do.
There's no message saying, hey, you know, if you do this, everything will be fine.
You guys are doomed.
You guys are sunk, 40 days, and you're toast, right?
I mean, that's basically the message.
And yet what do they do?
Do they just sit there and say, well, we're doomed anyway, so let's eat, drink, and be
merry because tomorrow we die?
No.
What they do is they proclaim a fast, they repent of their sin, they get right with God,
they even put sackcloth on the animals.
I mean, they're pulling out all the stops.
They're putting sackcloth on themselves.
They're putting sackcloth on the animals.
They're fasting and praying.
And you know what the men of Nineveh said?
They said, you know what, peradventure, maybe God will change His mind.
I mean, maybe the Lord will repent of the evil that He said that He would do unto us.
You know, I mean, we got nothing to lose here.
I mean, if we're going to be destroyed in 40 days, let's just at least try.
And you know what?
God is one that is of tender mercy.
He is a very merciful, gracious God.
He is easy to be entreated, okay?
And so God ends up backing off from what He had said that He would do unto them.
Why?
Because they had the right attitude.
They took no for an answer.
When God tells them, no, you're wicked, you're doomed, they didn't argue, what are you talking
about?
We're not that bad.
They accepted the rebuke.
They accepted the correction.
And then God ended up backing off on what He had said that He would do unto them, even
though it seemed like they had no hope.
There was hope, okay?
So if you actually take no for an answer when your parents tell you no, or when your boss
tells you no, or when God tells you no, the Word of God tells you no, you know, a lot
of times you'll end up finding mercy anyway, and things will go better for you.
Just learn to take no for an answer.
Have a most gladly attitude when you're told no, okay?
The Bible says something similar in Titus 2.9, it says, exhort servants to be obedient
unto their own masters and to please them well in all things, not answering again.
Right?
So that's taking no for an answer when you don't talk back and you don't answer again
and argue with every little thing.
And, you know, really this goes back to just taking rebuke in general.
You know, Cain was told no.
Hey, God, I've got the sacrifice for you.
And what did God tell Cain?
God told him no.
I'm not going to accept your vegan sacrifice.
I'm not doing fruits and vegetables, you know, it needs to be the blood of the lamb.
And he's told no, and instead of taking no for an answer and saying, okay, it was worth
the shot, God doesn't want this stuff, okay, I'm going to go get the right sacrifice and
bring it to him, he refuses to take no for an answer, he gets mad, he gets bitter, he
murders his brother, and, of course, you know the story.
Taking no for an answer is what we're talking about.
What about people, we talked about Saul who wanted to be king, even when he was told you
can't be king anymore.
What about pastors who can't be pastor anymore and they just want to keep pastoring, right?
Or guys who aren't even qualified in the first place but they just want to be a pastor anyway,
they won't take no for an answer, right?
That's wicked, all right?
So what am I talking about?
I'm talking about, let's say, a pastor, he's going along and his marriage just completely
disintegrates to the point where he gets a divorce.
His wife leaves him and then he just keeps on pastoring?
Folks, how is that ruling your house?
How is that one that ruleth well his own house?
You have failed in the most fundamental way.
Well, it's not his fault, she left him.
Really?
Because I thought the buck stops with the authority.
I mean, how could a husband just say, oh, this isn't my fault, aren't you the leader?
How are you not responsible for what happens in your home?
How are you not responsible for your wife's behavior?
I'm responsible for my wife's behavior, you're responsible for your wife's behavior, because
as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.
I'm responsible for my children's behavior.
It's my job to make sure that my wife and children are doing right, okay?
I'm the leader in the home and I can't just say, oh, not my fault.
Not my fault, she's wicked, she's rebellious.
Because otherwise you'll have these guys that completely neglect their wife, they don't
teach her anything, they don't spend any time with her, or they even treat her like
dirt, and then they treat their wife like dirt and their wife leaves, obviously it's
not right for their wife to leave, but you know what, it shows that they've failed as
a husband though.
Now, I know this isn't popular because everybody wants to come to you and tell you how their
divorce is not their fault, you know, but it should be that at least 50% of people should
be coming to you and telling you, hey, it was all my fault, right?
Because you know, if divorce is one person's fault, then at least 50% of people should
be saying, yup, it was all my fault.
But you know what you'll find is 90 some percent of divorced people saying, oh, it was all
the other person's fault.
But if we went and talked to them, is that what they're going to say?
Yup, my fault.
Is that what's going to happen?
No, they're both going to blame the other person typically.
Occasionally you'll have someone take responsibility.
But at the end of the day, people are going to get divorced, I understand that's the world
that we live in, especially in the United States of America, you got half of marriages
ending in divorce or three quarters of marriages ending in divorce, depending on which way
you look at the statistics, okay, fine.
But you know what?
That's not who we're going to put behind the pulpit.
You know, if you're divorced, okay, God can still use you.
You can still serve God.
You can still be used by God.
There's a lot that you can do to serve God.
There's a lot that you can do.
There's just two things that you can't do.
You can't be a pastor and you can't be a deacon, but you can do everything else.
Of all the trees of the garden now may as freely eat, okay, but you can't be a pastor
and you can't be a deacon.
Now how many pastors and deacons do we have here in this church?
Only a couple.
So you know, how many non-pastors and deacons do we have?
Ninety-nine percent of the people are not pastors and are not deacons, right?
So look around the room and you'll see all these people serving God without being a pastor
and without being a deacon.
Well, what's he supposed to do?
Well, what's everybody else doing?
Well, I mean, this guy's divorced.
What's he supposed to do now?
Well, I don't know.
Look around and see what everybody else is doing.
That's what he's supposed to do.
You know, he can still win souls.
He can still preach the gospel.
He can still evangelize and do missions and do all kinds of things, and he can still serve
in the church, and he can do jobs in the church.
He can work in the church, but he can't be a pastor or a deacon, right?
Because there are specific qualifications, and one of them is the husband of one wife
and one that ruleth well his own house.
And if your wife's leaving you, you have not met that qualification, okay?
You've got to take no for an answer if you don't meet the qualifications.
And you know, there are other qualifications for being a pastor.
If you don't meet the qualifications, just take no for an answer.
And you know what?
By the way, the Bible says you have to have children to be a pastor, having faithful children,
okay?
And yet today we have single men or couples with no children pastoring.
Folks, that's unbiblical.
And why are they pastoring when the Bible said no?
Because they won't take no for an answer, that's why, because they just have to be a
pastor anyway.
And you know, here's another subject that's maybe a sensitive subject, but what about
people who can't have kids and they won't take no for an answer when God withholds the
fruit of the womb?
When God withholds children, when God closes the womb, take no for an answer.
What's the classic example of this in the Bible?
Abraham.
You've got Abraham and Sarah and they're not having any children.
And so did they take no for an answer?
Well unfortunately, at one point, they had a lapse in judgment, lapse in faith, and Abraham
ends up taking Hagar unto him and having a child with her.
That wasn't God's will.
They had all kinds of problems, it was a big sin on their part, it's a bad example in the
Bible, and so that's an example of not taking no for an answer in regard to having children.
Look, let me just explain something to you.
If you don't have children right now, then that's God's will that you don't have children.
Because if God wanted you to have children, he would give you children.
And if he doesn't want you to have children, you're not going to have them.
And here's the thing, just because you don't have children now doesn't mean you're not
going to have children later.
And you say, well no, because I'm already past that point.
Well then, it's just not God's will for you to have children.
And you know, there are a lot of worse things out there than not having, well you just don't
understand.
You don't understand that the word of God teaches to wait on the Lord and that it's
him that opens and shuts the womb and he gives example after example.
It's not like the Bible is silent on this issue.
You've got the stories about Abraham and Sarah.
You've got the stories about Isaac and Rebekah.
You've got the story about Jacob and Rachel, right?
I mean, this is a, that's in the first book of the Bible, folks.
This is a theme in the Bible of barren women, entreating the Lord, eventually having a baby.
You have to wait on God, you have to pray.
Of course it's hard, but you know what, the Bible says take up your cross and follow him.
For some women, not having a child, that's your cross to bear right now.
Bear that cross, okay?
Everybody has their cross to bear and it's different for everybody.
We all have suffering that we go through in our lives and we're going through different
things, but you have to take no for an answer and not go out and do something crazy like
oh, we can't have kids so I'm going to divorce my spouse and go be with somebody who I can't
have kids with.
Or oh, I'm going to go out and do these IVF treatments.
Well guess what?
IVF is tampering with nature and the problem with that is that they end up fertilizing
like 30 eggs so that they can make one or two babies.
Folks that is not right because those babies are dying.
If we believe that life begins at conception and they're conceiving all these test tube
babies, they're fertilized embryos or blastocysts or whatever they want to call them, but it's
alive folks.
Who here believes that life begins at conception?
When the egg hits the sperm and it starts multiplying and growing, folks, that's a life
figure, okay, who thinks it's right to make 30 of those and then watch them for a while
and see which ones die off and then put seven of the good ones into the mother's womb or
three of the good ones or two of the good ones or whatever so that most of them can
die and not make it.
That's not natural.
That's not God's will.
That's not the way God designed it.
And you say, well, it's not wrong because they're not actually killing them.
But you're putting them in an environment where they die.
You put them in an unnatural environment where they die.
It's like me throwing my baby out in the snow and saying, well, I didn't kill it.
I just left it in the snow and it just died.
That's between it and God.
Folks, no, that test tube is like the snow.
Some are going to make it.
The strong are going to survive and others aren't.
But you know what?
It's just refusing to take no for an answer, forcing God's hand.
Give me children or else I die.
You know what Jacob said to that when his wife said, give me children or else I die?
He said, well, am I in the place of God who has withheld children from your womb?
Am I in the place of God?
God's the one who decided for you not to have kids.
And you know what's funny?
There are people who have kids that wish they didn't have kids.
People who don't.
And that's why they go out and get an abortion, right?
They get pregnant.
They don't want to be pregnant.
They get an abortion.
And then after they've aborted and used birth control and whatever, that's like, okay, I
want to have kids.
I want to have kids now.
Now let's do IVF.
There are literally women who've used birth control or even had an abortion and then later
did IVF.
They're like exactly like the children of Israel, won't go in the promised land when
he tells them to, want to go in when he tells them not to.
Over here, they're refusing to have kids, refusing to have kids, refusing to have kids.
And then now it's like, okay, now I want to have kids and God's like, well, no, that ship's
already sailed.
Okay, well now I'm going to force you, God.
Now let's go down to the IVF clinic and force your hand.
This is a perfect example of people not taking no for an answer.
Now another thing is that when people want to be your friend and you don't want to be
their friend, sometimes they won't take no for an answer.
And this needs to be touched upon frequently in the local church.
Now the church has hundreds of people in it.
Not everyone is going to be your friend.
Not everyone wants to be your friend.
Now here's what a normal person does.
A normal person takes no for an answer.
So they basically reach out to someone in friendship.
They kind of put out a feeler that they want to be friends.
And when that person doesn't respond, you know what they do?
They move on to somebody else.
That's what normal people do.
But here's what psychopaths do.
They just fixate and why won't you be my friend and you're going to be my friend and I don't
understand why you won't like me.
And they obsess.
And there are people who literally get obsessed, not in our church, but I mean people that
get obsessed and become a stalker and a weirdo and it's out there folks.
And what are they?
They're people that won't take no for an answer.
So let me, I can give you so many examples of this from over the last 13 and a half years.
I mean there was this one time that there was this family and they basically told another
family, hey, you know, we just don't want to be friends with you anymore.
You know, they try to tell them that as gently as possible.
And so this family comes to me, the dad comes to me and basically says to me like that he
wants me to force these people to be friends with him.
And I explained to the guy in no uncertain terms, I said to him, I don't believe in that.
If they don't want to be your friend, that's okay.
Just move on.
If they don't like you, if they have an issue with you and there aren't any hard feelings
or anything, everything was made right, but they just said, you know, we're just going
to kind of move on from this relationship.
We're just kind of done with this friendship.
You know, we'll smile and say hi, but we just don't want to hang out like we used to.
That's pretty normal folks.
Sometimes you just have to move on, you know, breaking up is hard to do or whatever, but
just move on.
All right.
So the point is, this guy comes to me and wanted me to literally force them to be friends
with him.
And I told the guy, no, anybody who doesn't want to be friends with anybody, that's okay
in the church.
Nobody's forced to be friends with anybody.
Just find somebody who does want to be your friend.
The guy comes to me like a month later with the same thing, telling me that I need to
force these people to be friends with them and telling me how, you know, in heaven we're
all going to be friends, so we might as well start now and everything.
And I told the guy, no, you're wrong.
And the guy ended up being a total pervert and a reprobate and a weirdo.
Okay.
But, you know, I didn't know that at the time, but I thought it was super weird how he just
won't take no for answer and trying to force people to be friends with him, okay.
Find people in the church that you like and that like you.
Find your circle of friends.
Find people to fellowship with.
You say, well, nobody wants to be my friend.
Then there's something wrong with you then.
You know, you go to charm school or something.
I mean, you need to change something about the way you're acting.
If nobody wants to be your friend, if everybody's shunning you, then maybe you need to take
a hard look at yourself and figure out what you're doing to push people away.
You know, can I direct you to the self-help section at the library so you figure out what's
wrong with you, okay.
The point is, look, if you show yourself friendly, you're going to have friends.
I mean, if you're nice to people, if you treat people well, but you know what?
If you're a pain, people aren't going to want to be your friend.
If you're obnoxious, people aren't going to want to be your friend.
You know, you got to show yourself friendly if you want to be a person that has friends.
And so learn to take no for an answer.
Now, let me just kind of explain to you how this works because I want to break this down
really simple to make this really clear.
You know, hey, hey, you want to go out to lunch this Saturday?
You want to go out to lunch?
And then he tells me, he says, no, you know, I'm busy.
I got plans and, you know, well, how about next Saturday?
No, you know, what about the Saturday after that?
How about Monday?
How about Tuesday?
How about Wednesday?
See, here's the way this works, okay?
If you invite somebody, and look, it's great to invite people out to eat because that's
a great way to fellowship.
Hey, you guys want to go run over to, you know, the restaurant here or you guys want
to come over to my house or, you know, whatever, inviting people over or going out to eat with
people.
That's a great way to fellowship.
That's how church works, you know, after church.
You go out to lunch with people sometimes and this and that.
So here's the way this works.
When you invite somebody out for the first time, right?
It's your first time inviting somebody out for lunch, right, or dinner or whatever.
And they make an excuse, oh, we're busy, we have something else going on.
Here's the way this works.
The ball's kind of in their court now, you know what I mean?
So and especially if you've done it twice, let's say, and then you've invited them another
time and they turned you down again, now the ball's kind of in their court.
Now it's kind of up to them to basically come to you and say, hey, you know, did you want
to still go out to eat because I'm available on such and such today and the ball's kind
of in their court.
You know, this is kind of what normal people learned growing up.
You're supposed to kind of learn this on the playground or learn this in church or learn
this wherever, on the job.
Hopefully by the time you're an adult, you kind of understand that you kind of get a
vibe from certain people that they want to be friends with you and then you kind of get
a vibe from other people that they're kind of like, hey, you know, don't call us, we'll
call you, all right?
And that's the kind of the vibe that you get from them.
Don't just keep badgering people and pushing people and forcing them to be your friend
and they're kind of like backing away and you're just kind of getting them in a corner,
you know?
You've got to just learn how to take no for an answer, right?
Now here's the thing.
A normal person, if somebody doesn't want to be their friend, they don't want to be
friends anyway.
I mean, if I want to be friends with someone, let's say I reach out to a fellow pastor and
I reach out to him and I want to be his friend and I want to fellowship with him and I'm
kind unto him or maybe I want to get together and go soul-winding with him, have something
to eat with him, have him come out and preach or something, you know, if I reach out to
him in some way and he just doesn't want to be my friend, then my natural reaction to
that is, well, I don't want to be his friend either then.
I mean, if he doesn't want to be friends, then this just isn't going to work.
This just is not a fit here, right?
Even if I extend that right hand of fellowship and he wants to be friends, great, right?
This is how friendship works, right?
It's a mutual thing.
So if people don't want to be your friends, find someone else who does want to be your
friend.
Keep looking.
There are lots of wonderful friends out there waiting for you.
It's just not me, okay?
But it's not you.
It's me.
No, I'm just kidding.
There are a whole bunch of wonderful friends out there just waiting for you to discover
them, okay?
But there are other people out there who don't want to be your friend.
And there are people in this church who don't want to be your friend.
And here's the thing, it might not even be because they don't like you, they might just
not have any room for a new friend in their life right now.
You know, some people are just busy, they just have too much going on or they already
have too many friends and their social calendar is just booked.
And so it's not even that they don't like you, it's just that they just don't have time
for you right now and that's life.
Look, you can't just say yes to everyone.
And by the way, this sermon is called Taking No for an Answer.
You know, the flip side of this is learning how to say no sometimes.
You don't always have to say yes.
You know, when people ask you to do something, when people ask you to go somewhere or ask
you over, you don't always have to say yes either.
You can learn to say no at times because you know what, some people who never say no, they
end up putting too much pressure on themselves and they fill their calendar too full.
Because I have this problem of just kind of saying yes to things and then next thing
I know, I'm just booked and I have no free time and I'm at the end of my rope.
So I have to be reasonable and learn sometimes.
Sometimes if I get invited to preach or something, I just have to say, hey, I'm sorry, I can't
do that right now.
I'm just too busy right now.
I can't do that.
Hey, can you do this?
Can you do that?
No, I'm sorry, I'm not going to be able to make it.
And I have to turn down social engagements sometimes, turn down preaching engagements
because I'm just too busy.
And if you get busy, sometimes you just have to say no.
And if people tell you no, take no for an answer.
And you know what, maybe later on, six months from now, maybe that person will have a little
more room in their life for a little bit more socialization and friendship and they're in
that phase.
And then, hey, you can be friends.
And then you're like, no, sorry, that ship's already sailed.
Go by the Red Sea.
So anyway, this is an important concept.
Learn to take no for an answer.
When your kids, when your parents tell you no, it's no.
Maybe you come to the pastor and say, hey, can I do this?
I want to be ordained or I want to do this.
And maybe the pastor says, I'm not going to ordain you.
You know what, when someone's told you're not going to be ordained as pastor, you find
out what kind of a person they are real fast.
Because being ordained isn't just a rubber stamp.
So sometimes I've told people, look, I love you, you're a great person, I love having
you in the church, but I don't think you're cut out to pastor, I'm not going to ordain
you.
And you know what, how that person receives that speaks volumes.
Can they take no for an answer?
And I've even told these people, I said, you know, if you end up going somewhere else and
getting ordained, I mean, you know, I don't, that's none of my business.
You know, I'm okay with that.
But I personally don't think that you're cut out for that and so I'm not going to participate
in that.
You know, and how they react to that speaks volumes.
Can they take no for an answer?
You know, when you tell people no, you find out what kind of a person they are in many
cases.
So this is something that goes all through the Bible, whether we're talking about Cain
and Abel, whether we're talking about Esau, we're talking about the children of Israel,
King Saul, the Apostle Paul, I mean, it's a major theme in the Bible.
Take no for an answer, right?
When it comes to even just your social life, take no for an answer, right?
Now you guys, you know, maybe you might need to push a little harder with the girls, you
know, and, you know, don't just take no right away.
You know, you might want to ask them on a second date, okay, try it.
But eventually, you know what, you need to take no for an answer, right?
If some girl's not interested in you, you can't just keep on, you know, you turn into
a stalker at some point, right?
You know, it's good to be aggressive, it's good to, you know, ask a few times, but eventually
you got to take no for an answer, right?
And girls, if you don't want to go out on a date with them, be willing to say no.
It's okay to say no.
You know, you're washing your hair or whatever.
That's life.
All right, let's bow our heads and have a word of prayer.
Father, we thank you so much for your word, Lord, and all these great examples, Lord,
help us to take these life lessons and apply them.
When we're out soul winning, Lord, help us to take no for an answer.
If people don't want to hear the gospel, Lord, just help us to shake the dust off our feet,
Lord.
If Ireland doesn't want Pastor Anderson to come preach to them, well, you know what,
that's their loss.
And I'm just going to move on, Lord, and take no for an answer.
Help us to understand this concept that when the Bible tells us no, we need to just accept
that answer.
When our parents or other authorities tell us no, we need to accept it gracefully in
order to be blessed.
When we accept no for an answer, we'll be blessed.
So thank you for this teaching from your word, and in Jesus' name we pray, amen.