["Pomp and Circumstance"]
Good morning ladies and gentlemen.
Welcome to Faith Award Baptist Church this morning.
It's such a joy to see you all here for our Sunday morning service.
Monday morning service.
Find your seats now and take your hymnals.
Go to hymn number 260, number 260.
He is able to deliver the hymn number 260.
Once you find your place, we'll begin on that first
verse together.
Hymn number 260.
Tis the grandest steam through the ages rung.
Hymn number 260.
Singing out with me on that first now, number 260.
Tis the grandest steam through the ages rung.
Tis the grandest steam for a mournful time.
Tis the grandest steam that the world e'er sung.
Our God is able to deliver thee.
He is able to deliver thee.
Though my sin outvests no dream.
For as our God is able to deliver thee.
Tis the grandest steam in the earth for fame.
Tis the grandest steam for a mournful spring.
Tis the grandest steam that the world holds again.
Our God is able to deliver thee.
He is able to deliver thee.
Though my sin outvests no dream.
For as our God is able to deliver thee.
Tis the grandest steam that the tidings roll through.
The guilty heart to the sinful soul.
But your God is daily will make me whole.
Our God is able to deliver thee.
He is able to deliver thee.
Though my sin outvests no dream.
For as our God is able to deliver thee.
Father in Heaven, we thank you, Lord God, for sending your Son, Jesus Christ, and for
salvation.
We thank you, Lord God, for the Bible, and for our church, and we pray, God, that you
please bless this church service this morning, and thank you, Lord, for helping us to gather
here, and we pray, God, that we can worship you and sing hymns unto you, and we pray,
God, that you please fill past your answer with your spirit as He preaches your word.
In Jesus' name we pray.
Amen.
Christ receiveth sinful men.
Hymn number 258.
258 sinners, Jesus will receive.
Hymn number 258.
Lift it up on that verse now.
258.
Sinners, Jesus will receive.
Sound this word of grace to all who the heavenly path will leave.
All who linger, all who fall, sing it o'er and o'er again.
Christ receiveth sinful men.
Make the message clear and plain.
Christ receiveth sinful men.
Come and He will give you rest.
Trust Him for His word is plain.
He will take the sinful last.
Christ receiveth sinful men.
Sing it o'er and o'er again.
Christ receiveth sinful men.
Make the message clear and plain.
Christ receiveth sinful men.
Now my heart can next be done.
You're before the law I stand.
He who cleansed me from a spot.
Satisfied His last demand.
Sing it o'er and o'er again.
Christ receiveth sinful men.
Make the message clear and plain.
Christ receiveth sinful men.
Even me with all my sin.
Purged from every spot and stain.
And within my enter in.
Sing it o'er and o'er again.
Christ receiveth sinful men.
Make the message clear and plain.
Christ receiveth sinful men.
Man, good singing.
All right, at this time we'll go through our announcements together.
If you don't have a bulletin, slip up your hand nice and high.
On the inside we have our service time.
Sunday mornings at 1030 is our preaching service.
Sunday nights at 6.
Wednesday nights at 7 is our Bible study.
This week we will be actually pausing the Bible study
and having Pastor Aaron Thompson from Shure Foundation
Baptist Church in Vancouver, Washington and like five other places.
And so he's going to be coming to preach for us.
And so don't miss it this Wednesday night.
Even if you don't normally come on a Wednesday night,
be sure to come out and hear Brother Thompson preach.
And then we've got below that the soul winning times,
salvations and baptisms.
Cross the page of course.
Congratulations to the Furbays on their wedding yesterday.
Thank you to everyone who showed up and celebrated with them.
Keep praying for our expectant ladies
that they'll have a safe and healthy pregnancy and delivery.
On the back we've got a baby shower coming up.
Two weeks from today on Sunday, February 2nd, 2 to 4 for Lola.
And that is going to be again right here.
All ladies and teenage girls are invited to attend.
And then below that in the other upcoming events,
I'm going to be preaching at Anchor Baptist Church in Oklahoma City
on not this Friday but next Friday.
It says Wednesday. It's supposed to be Friday, January 31st
because I'll be here on Wednesday of that week.
But Friday, January 31st is what that is.
And that is of course Pastor Dylan Oz.
He was sent out by steadfast.
He just got ordained by Pastor Shelley a few weeks ago I think
or a month ago or so, very recently.
And so I'm going to be preaching at that church in Oklahoma City
on Friday, January 31st.
And then we've got the birthday donuts coming up February 1st.
Pastor Jonathan Shelley is going to be preaching here on Wednesday, February 19th.
And then of course we have the Bahamas Cruise Missions Trip.
I think we already have about 20 people signed up for that.
And so if you need any information about that, you want more details,
if you have any interest in that at all, then reach out.
You can email the church at the church email address or talk to Brother Segura.
He's the one who's going to be spearheading that trip.
He's going to be the one that's on the trip with you on that one.
And so that is March 23rd through 28th.
And so that's going to be I believe a very fruitful, productive trip
because the Bahamas is just a super receptive place to go soul winning.
It's really great because it's almost like a soul winning boot camp
because you're just given the gospel so much.
Because when you go soul winning in Phoenix, you've got to get through
50 people that aren't interested or more to get to someone
where you present the whole gospel to them.
Whereas over there, it's just lots of people want to talk.
Lots of people are interested.
And so I just took my teenage daughter and she probably gave the gospel
more times just in those couple of days than she had in weeks or months
previous to that.
And so it really helped her hone her soul winning presentation
because she's just getting so much practice right in a row.
So anyway, some of you should think about participating this year.
We really want to get as many people to participate this year as possible.
And it doesn't necessarily have to be this trip because we're going to
have lots of other trips as well.
And then also we're always wanting people to organize their own trips too.
And if you just have a certain date or a certain week that works for you,
you can start a trip.
And then as long as it's a good trip,
as long as it seems like it's going to be effective,
then we can just get on your bandwagon and promote your trip.
And so it's not that it's just this week,
but we want to send as many people to the mission field this year as possible
on a variety of different trips, times, places, et cetera.
So I'm excited about that.
And I believe that's about it for announcements.
So let's go ahead and sing our next song.
Come lead us.
All right, you should find the insert in front of your hymnal with Psalm 19.
If you don't have an insert, please raise your hand and you'll receive one.
Psalm 19, the law of the Lord is perfect.
Oh,
the statutes of the Lord
is
the fear of the Lord
for ever
the judgments of the Lord are true
and righteous altogether
more to be desired are they than gold
yet a much fine gold
sweeter also than honey
and the honey of the Lord
the
man good thing everybody take your hymnals down turn to him number 11 number
11 him number 11 he died for me him number
11 number 11 begins
I saw one hanging on the tree in agony and blood let's sing this down
pay attention these words as you see them out together number 11 he died for me
sing it out I saw
one hanging on a tree
in agony
and blood he
faced his languid eyes
on me as near
his cross I stood
oh can him be
upon a tree the
Savior died for me
my soul is thrilled
my heart is filled to
make me die for me
sure never
till my latest breath
can I forget that
look
it seemed to charge me with
his blood though not the word
he spoke
oh can it be upon
a tree the Savior
died for me
my soul is thrilled my
heart is filled to make
me die for me
my conscience felt
and all the guilt and
much became his
I saw my
sins his blood had still
and hell to nail him there
oh can it
be upon a tree
the Savior died for
me my soul
is thrilled my heart is
filled to make me die
for me
alas I knew not what
I did but now my
tears are made
where shall my trembling soul
be hid for I the
Lord have slain
oh can it be
upon a tree the
Savior died for me
my soul is thrilled
my heart is filled to
make me die for me
a second
look he gave which said
I freely all forgive
this blood is
for thy ransom paid
I died that thou may
live oh can it
be upon a tree
the Savior died
for me my
soul is thrilled my heart
is filled to make
me die for me
Amen. Good singing this morning.
Alright this time we'll pass our offering plates around. As the plates go
around let's turn our Bibles to Proverbs 27
Proverbs chapter number 27 as we always do we'll read
the entire chapter beginning in verse number 1. Follow along silently with brother Corbin
Brock as he reads Proverbs chapter 27 starting in verse number 1.
Proverbs 27
boast not thyself of tomorrow for thou knowest not what a day may bring forth
let another man praise thee in not thine own mouth
a stranger in not thine own lips a stone is heavy
and the sand weighty but a fool's wrath is heavier than them both
wrath is cruel and anger is outrageous but who is able to stand before
envy open rebuke is better than secret love faithful
are the wounds of a friend but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful
the full soul loath in honeycomb but to the hungry soul every bitter thing
is sweet as a bird that wandereth from her nest so is a man
that wandereth from his place ointment and perfume rejoice the heart
so doth the sweetness of a man's friend by hearty counsel
thine own friend and thy father's friend forsake not neither go into
thy brother's house in the day of thy calamity for better is a neighbor that is
near than a brother far off my son be wise and make
my heart glad that I may answer him that reproaches me
a prudent man foreseeeth the evil and hideth himself but the simple pass on and are
punished take his garment that is surety for a stranger
and take a pledge of him for a strange woman he that blesseth
his friend with a loud voice rising early in the morning it shall be counted
accursed to him a continual dropping in a very rainy day and
a contentious woman are alike whosoever hideth her hideth the wind
and the ointment of his right hand which beareth itself
iron sharpeneth iron so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend
whoso keepeth the fig tree shall eat the fruit thereof so he that waiteth
on his master shall be honored as in water face
answerth to face so the heart of a man
to man hell and destruction are never full so the eyes of man are never
satisfied as the finding pot for silver and the furnace for gold
so is a man to his praise though thou shouldest
bray a fool in a mortar among wheat with a pestle yet will not his foolishness
depart from him be thou diligent to know the state of thy flocks and
look well to thy herds for riches are not forever
and doth the crown endure to every generation the hay appearth and the tender
grass showeth itself and herbs of the mountains are gathered
the lambs are for thy clothing and the goats are the price of the field
and thou shalt have goats milk enough for thy food for the food of thy household
and for the maintenance for thy maidens
Father in heaven thank you for this day
and thank you for faith the word baptist church please feel pastor with your spirit
as he preaches and please give us ears to hear in Jesus name I pray
amen. Man the title of my sermon this morning is
loyalty to your friends loyalty to your
friends I was writing a sermon about loyalty in general
but I was on point one about loyalty to your friends and once I got like
five pages in I realized like this is its own sermon just
about being loyal to your friends because there's so much scripture on this topic
now the word loyalty is not found in the Bible
but the word faithfulness is found in the Bible and if you look
up loyalty in the dictionary you'll find that every definition
of loyal includes the word faithful so for example I looked it up on
dictionary.com number one to be loyal means to be
faithful to one's sovereign government or state
this would be like a loyal subject of a king number two
faithful to one's oaths commitments or obligations that's
loyalty to a vow number three faithful to any
leader party cause or any person or thing
conceived as deserving fidelity example
a loyal friend and then number four characterized
by or showing faithfulness to commitments vows
allegiance obligations etc. loyal conduct
and so we see that every definition of loyal includes the word faithful and of course
faithful is used throughout scripture so although this exact word is not
used this concept is all throughout the Bible and we're gonna
look at some of that now now we started here in Proverbs chapter
27 where the Bible reads in verse number nine ointment and perfume
rejoice the heart so does the sweetness
of a man's friend by hearty counsel so we see in this verse
that friendship is something beautiful it's something pleasant
it's something that makes life enjoyable right spending time
with friends taking counsel having deep
conversations with friends is beautiful but at the end of the day
that is not the only thing friendship is for it's not just something
that we enjoy like we might enjoy a good cheeseburger or something like that
but rather friendship goes beyond that because look at the next verse
thine own friend and thy father's friend forsake
not neither go into thy brother's house in the day of thy calamity
for better is a neighbor that is near than a brother
far off and what we find is that friends are people that are supposed
to be there for you when you are in trouble in the day
of your calamity okay keep your finger there
in Proverbs 27 and flip back to Proverbs 18
and we'll see another verse about this and this is a really famous verse
that is usually applied to the Lord Jesus Christ when it's preached
and of course that is a great way to apply this verse because what a friend
we have in Jesus but that is obviously not the primary
meaning of this verse although it's a great application to think about
the Lord Jesus with this primarily it's talking about just human
friendship and so it says in verse 24 of chapter 18
a man that has friends must show himself friendly
and there is a friend that sticketh closer
than a brother right there is such thing as
a friend sticking closer to you than a brother
many times friendships are even more important than family
relationships in our lives this is the way life ends up working
in many cases and then just go back one page to
chapter 17 verse 17 and we'll see the same thing
where it says a friend loveth at all
times and a brother is born for adversity
and so we see that friendship goes beyond just oh someone I like to hang out with
and oh we have so much fun together and oh it's so great no actually
friendship is supposed to be a commitment
that's why the bible says thine own friend and thy father's friend forsake
not because that's a commitment
to be there for people when they need you a friend
we live at all times right we don't want to be a fair weather
friend where we're only friends with people when they're an asset
unto us when they can do something for us and we think about the story of the prodigal
son he goes out into a far country and wastes all
his substance with riotous living later his older brother
says oh he spent his money with harlots right and chances
are if he went out into the far country blowing a bunch of money
he probably was surrounded by a bunch of people because the bible says that when you have money
and you're given gifts you're going to have a lot of friends and so I guarantee you
that when he's at the casino and when he was at the bar and the
night club and out partying he probably had plenty of people
hanging out with him and partying with him but then the
bible says that when he began to be in want when he ran out of money
when there was an economic downturn and there was a famine in the land it says
no man gave unto him nobody would take him in
nobody would help him out right so he was surrounded by fake friends
fair weather friends and of course he'd been disloyal to his father
disloyal to his family so no marvel
that people end up being disloyal to him and when he needs help nobody's there to help him
okay and so we see that a friend
loves at all times and a brother is born for adversity
okay a man that hath friends must show himself friendly and there's a friend
that sticketh closer than a brother meaning that
he'll be there for you through thick and thin and when the bible says a man
that hath friends must show himself friendly is that you know you've got to be a
friend unto others if you want people to be a friend unto you
if you want people to be there when you need them then you better be there for them
when they need you friendship is supposed to be a two way street
okay and that's what the bible is teaching and so thine own friend
and thy father's friend forsake not
right do not abandon would be another word that we could use for this
your friend in their time of trouble and it even says don't even abandon
your father's friend right because sometimes there's like a friend of the family
and those relationships are a commitment as well in many cases
so friendship is pretty important okay
and it's going to be important to you one day when you're going through a hard time
and you need someone to lean on well then you're going to want that friend to be there
well you should be that person in other people's lives as well
because a man that hath friends must show himself friendly
there are some people in our modern society that don't value friendship
and in fact I feel like as our society becomes
more and more prosperous and affluent and as we also get away from
christian principles and morals people are becoming more
selfish in general right and the bible prophesied that in the last days
men will be lovers of their own selves
and so because of this trend a lot of people in our modern society
don't really value friendship they don't think it's important to have friends but you know the
apostle Paul he was pretty big on friendship because if you think about
some of the things that he said in his epistles he brings up a lot of
friends that he's praying for by name on a daily basis and then at
the end of his epistles he'll give shout outs to various friends
and the one where he really just goes crazy with it is Romans chapter 16
I mean Romans chapter 16 virtually the whole chapter is just a list
of shout outs to various friends that the apostle
Paul has and so he really cared about his friends John did the
same thing in third John he says at the end of his epistle our friends
salute thee greet the friends by name and so
he didn't you know belabor us with the big list like Romans 16
but he just said greet the friends by name you know you know who they are
and we don't need to give a big list but I think that we have the big list
in Romans chapter 16 to show that the apostle Paul was someone who
cared about people he cared about individuals his friends were
important to him now if you would go to second Timothy chapter number one
second Timothy chapter number one what's the sermon about
loyalty to your friends right thine own
friend and thy father's friend forsake not
right because one day you're going to come into calamity
and better is a neighbor that is near than a brother that's far
off and there's a friend that sticks closer than a brother and you might
need a friend someday so you better not forsake
your friends in their time of need that's what the Bible's teaching
now here's a great example of friendship in second Timothy chapter one the Bible
says in verse 15 this thou knowest that all they which are
in Asia be turned away from me of whom are by jealous and homogeneous
of course that's not a good example of friendship but the good example of friendship is coming in the next
verse but he's saying look all they which are in Asia be turned away from me
so the apostle Paul is at a point where a lot of people have
forsaken him a lot of people have abandoned him and remember
Asia was a big mission field for the apostle Paul where he had some of his
biggest success where he had some of the most people saved and did some of his
greatest works in places like Ephesus and now he says
all they which are in Asia be turned away from me and then
he even brings up some especially painful people by
jealous and homogeneous but he says the Lord give mercy unto the house of Onesiphorus
for he oft refreshed me and was not
ashamed of my chain and so it's refreshing
when a good friend is there for you in times of trouble when you
need them and look the apostle Paul is in prison many people apparently were
ashamed of the chain he said look everybody turned away from me but
this guy wasn't ashamed of the chain that tells me that the reason why
a lot of people had turned away from him was because of the persecution he was enduring
because of the heat that he was enduring they didn't want to get burned by getting too
close to that heat and so they distanced themselves
from the apostle Paul whereas Onesiphorus
was not ashamed of the chain you know he wasn't
abandoning his friend because now his friend has gone from being an asset to a liability
oh I'm done here I only want friends that can benefit me right
that's wicked that's an ungodly view of friendship right it's about being
a friend it's about showing yourself friendly and so Onesiphorus was a great
friend it says that he wasn't ashamed of the chain but
when he was in Rome he sought me out very diligently and
found me the Lord granted him that he might find mercy
of the Lord in that day and in how many things he ministered unto me at Ephesus
thou knowest very well so remember Ephesus was a very important
city in Asia what we know as modern day Turkey
but also known as Asia Minor and that's what the Bible is referring to when it
talks about Asia talking about the Anatolian peninsula
modern day Turkey and it says here that he ministered unto
me at Ephesus so remember everybody in Asia turned away from me but then
Onesiphorus is the exception so this is an Ephesian guy
because when he's in Ephesus he's ministering unto him a ton but then
even when the apostle Paul's in Rome which is of course
very far from Ephesus when Onesiphorus is in Rome
he sought him out very diligently because he knew that the apostle Paul
is also in Rome and it was probably a little bit harder than just
picking up a cell phone and just dialing Paul hey you still in Rome
I know you're on house arrest how's that ankle bracelet treating you let me just come by
and see you you know obviously it might have been tough to figure out where the
apostle Paul is on house arrest where he's staying so he
took a bunch of time out of his schedule to make a point
to go find Paul right to ask around he probably had to
spend days or even weeks looking for the apostle
Paul because it wasn't just as easy as just googling it or making a phone
call he had to figure out where the apostle Paul he sought him out
very diligently and found him right
finding Paul was a challenge to figure out where he even is to visit him
have you ever noticed those friends in your life that just never make
the effort to reach out to you they don't make the effort
like they won't pick up the phone they won't visit they won't do anything or how about
this you'll travel thousands of miles and you'll be close
they won't drive like the last 20 minutes to meet you where you're at
you've come 2,000 miles and they won't go the 30 minutes
or the hour or whatever you know what I'm saying it's like they
just don't really value your friendship that much and there are a lot of people who
they don't make the effort to pick up the phone to send a text message
to send a letter to send a card send an email
come see you make time for you right and you have these one
sided friendships in your life often and it's really sad
Onesiphorus wasn't that kind of a guy he wasn't just one of these friends that just takes and takes
and takes when it's convenient for him no when it's inconvenient for him
he'll go out of his way to be a friend to the apostle Paul when
Paul's unpopular when all the rest of his Ephesian buddies
and Asian buddies have pulled off away from the apostle Paul's
friendship he makes a point to go out of his way to see
Paul even in a distant land and so this is a great example of
friendship and of course the apostle Paul is wishing him well for this the Lord
grant unto him that he may find mercy of the Lord in that day
and how many things he ministered unto me at Ephesus thou knowest very well
right now go if you would to chapter 4
of the same book we're in 2 Timothy because I want to make this point as well
friends who were disloyal in the past can later redeem themselves
and I think a great example of this is the apostle Peter right because Peter was a
disloyal friend to the Lord Jesus Christ because Jesus Christ is
arrested he's going to be crucified and people are confronting
Peter just casually in conversation like hey you're one of
his disciples too right it's not like they're trying to place him under arrest or something
but it's like a serving maid the waitress
is like hey you know you were also with his disciples
no no I don't know him I know not the man right so this
was a disloyalty of sorts he's not being loyal to his friend
the Lord Jesus Christ of course the Bible says
greater love hath no man than this that a man laid down his life for his friends but
Peter just denies even knowing Jesus and of course this
makes Peter very sad he goes out and weeps bitterly but
he's restored later right because Jesus comes to him
and he says Peter lovest thou me more than these and of course
he's right to question Peter's love because Peter was disloyal and
Peter denied him and so he's questioning his love but Peter of course
he's sad he's grieved he says Lord you know I love you but here's how
Peter really redeemed himself is that Peter went out and boldly proclaimed
Christ after that and so he showed so much loyalty
to Christ in the book of Acts that and he
ended up ultimately dying for Christ according to John 21 what it
prophesied there so he ultimately went on to die for Jesus Christ and so
he was disloyal but he repented and redeemed himself
right and I think that there's probably a little bit of that
in 2 Timothy chapter 4 verse 16 as well because it says
at my first answer no man stood with me but all men
forsook me I pray God that it may not be laid to their charge because
I think that when he says at my first answer no man stood with me the implication is
that subsequently some people did stand with him in the long run
but at the first answer nobody stood with him in the beginning and he says
hey father forgive them for that right let not that be laid to their charge
notwithstanding the Lord stood with me and strengthened me because of course
the Lord is the ultimate friend that sticks closer than a brother
not with saying the Lord stood with me and strengthened me that by me the preaching might be
fully known and that all the Gentiles might hear and I was delivered out of the mouth
of the lion go if you went to Job chapter 6 when we think about
friends and we think about loyalty to your friends
and we think about being a friend and being there for
people when they need us and honoring that commitment
that is implicit in friendship one passage
that we might think of in the Bible is the story of Job
because of the fact that Job is visited by his three friends
now Job's three friends are not
really the worst friends imaginable now obviously they're not
good friends in one sense but they're also not as bad
as a lot of other friends like I've had a lot of friends that were way worse than
Job's three friends they made Job's three friends look great
because if you think about it Job's three friends at least they care enough
to go out of their way to visit him and spend a week with him so at least they're
spending time with them they're spending a week with them and although they're wrong
although they're misguided their heart seems
to be in the right place even though they're doing something stupid falsely
accusing Job and so forth here's the thing at least they're there at least they're
saying it to his face you know they're not just going and making a
YouTube video about Job or something and then contacting him later
you know first going live to the whole world then come back
oh hey can I talk to you Job no you know at least Job's three friends
had the decency to come and talk to him face to face they
cared about him and then ultimately they end up being sorry
and getting things right and apologizing and everybody lives happily ever after
so Job's three friends are not the greatest friends but
they're not the worst friends either but they're still bad friends you know in general
but look what the Bible says in Job chapter 6 verse 14
it says to him that is afflicted
pity should be showed from his friend but
he forsaketh the fear of the Almighty now what's interesting about this
is that showing pity to your friends is apparently something that
God expects and how do I know that God expects
us to be loyal to our friends because the Bible says that
pity should be showed from this friend but he the bad
friend forsakes the fear of the Almighty apparently the fear of God
would motivate me to be actually loyal to my friends and not throw them under
the bus and not forsake my friends that makes sense because God says thine own
friend and thy father's friend forsake not you say well I'm just going to go
ahead and forsake my friends anyway well do you fear God
because the Bible literally says that pity
should be showed from a friend but unfortunately
instead that guy forsakes the fear of the Almighty sounds to me
like God expects us to be good friends
friendship doesn't seem to be optional in the Christian life
okay look if you would at verse 15 it says my brethren
have dealt deceitfully as a brook and as the stream of
brooks they pass away which are blackish by reason of the ice
and wherein the snow is hid what time they wax warm they vanish
when it's hot they're consumed out of their place the paths of their way are turned aside
they go to nothing and perish so Job here
is comparing bad friends to these sort of
seasonal brooks that are there only at certain
times of year and actually when you need them the most is when they're not there
because when would you need to drink from the brook the most
probably the height of summer oh it's totally dried up at that time
right and then you might need it in the winter while it's frozen
so it's only at the most beautiful times of year in the spring
and in the fall when it's flowing only when it's nice
outside this is the fair weather friend now this reminds me of
a hike that we like to do which is uh
what's that hike called that we like to do Barnhart who said that
alright thank you Barnhart is a really cool hike Barnhart trail
it's on the way to Payson you pull off to the left and there's a lot of really
cool like geological things going on it's really cool fascinating
but anyway it's really neat and there are
some really cool like waterfalls and springs of water
but if you go there at the wrong time they're dried up
they're not going it's like a seasonal thing and so you gotta be there at the right time
of year and so these bad friends they're
deceitful they deal with you deceitfully as a brook
like yeah look at me I'm beautiful clear fresh refreshing water
till you need me the most and then I'm gone
so he says they've dealt deceitfully as a brook as the streams
of brooks they pass away which are blackest by reason of the ice and
wherein the snow is hid what time they wax warm they vanish
when it's hot they're consumed out of their place so if it's too
cold they're not there if it's too hot they're not there
they're only there when it's convenient for them and this is how
a lot of friends are unfortunately and this is what Job is bringing up
he's lamenting the fact that his friends are not refreshing him when he's
going through his ordeal the paths of their way are turned aside
they go to nothing and perish now here's a common
excuse that people will have for forsaking their friends throwing their
friends under the bus when their friends are in a bind is
that they say well it's their own fault they'll blame
you for your predicament and that's why they're not going to be there for you because it's
it's your fault what you did you know and you could probably
think about this in Paul's case probably a lot of people are saying like well you shouldn't have gone
to Jerusalem and preach that sermon in Jerusalem that's why you're in Rome
that's why you're in prison so therefore I'm not going to visit you
I'm not going to refresh you I'm not going to stand with you I'm not going to
support you because that was your own stupid fault for going to Jerusalem and preaching that
sermon and here's the thing in many ways they would have been right because he really shouldn't
have gone to Jerusalem and the Holy Ghost was even warning him not to go to Jerusalem
and he went there anyway and he kind of did screw up a little bit but
here's the thing he screwed up in a minor way but he's still preaching
the gospel of Jesus Christ to crowds in Jerusalem he's still being
used by God and even after he goes to Jerusalem even though it's a bad idea
God still tells him fear not I'm going to use you to preach
to those in Rome you're going to be preaching to Caesar's household
and so a lot of people's excuse is just well
it's your own fault therefore I'm not going to help you even though you've been my friend for years
I'm not going to help you because this is your fault or whatever and you can imagine this too in our modern day
well you shouldn't have preached so hard against the homos
you know you went a little too far in that sermon so therefore I can't support you and here's
what's funny about that is that you know a lot of my friends
have come under fire for preaching hard against sodomites and they've gone
through persecutions even worse than I've gone through because I've been persecuted for
preaching hard but honestly I feel like several of my friends have gone
through worse persecutions for the preaching that they've done
I feel like my persecution was minor compared to a lot of the persecutions that they've been through
and here's the thing I could have easily in some of those
situations gone back to those sermons and
really analyzed them with a fine tooth comb and said like
well I wouldn't have said it quite like because I wouldn't have said it quite like because we're all
different and maybe I could have looked at it and said well he
did go a little too far here well you know I wouldn't have said it
that way or well he kind of brought it on himself by wording it that way or whatever
is that what I did? No that's not what I did because I'm 110%
always going to support the man of God against a bunch of filthy sodomites
I'm not going to sit there and say well you know you
kind of brought this on yourself by the way you did it or the way that you said
no it was always I support the man of God he's right
and here's the thing we don't expect people to be 100%
exactly perfect and sinless or we're not going to
support the pastor we're not going to support the man of God no hey we
are going to support our friends we're going to support God's people we're going to
support Christians against the unsaved reprobate
sodomite masses okay
and so yeah you can always come up with an excuse
why you're going to abandon your friends in their time of trouble like well
it's your own fault that you're in this situation or you made
a bad financial decision and so this is your own fault or you
did this mistake here or you said this or whatever obviously
you can always find some little fine print for you to kind of wiggle out of
your commitments to your friends right and why you're going to
abandon your friends but it isn't right
and here's the thing if you look at Job
and his friends because we're in Job 6 the part about
the seasonal brooks there a little bit later in the same chapter
you're going to see him talk a little bit
about this subject of accusing him even though they
don't really have a specific accusation because here's the thing just
because your friends aren't perfect doesn't mean you abandon them but what's even worse
is Job's friends they're not even pointing out something specific
that he did wrong it's not like people could say about the impossible hey you shouldn't have
gone to Jerusalem or something I mean Job's friends can't point out
any law that he's violated or anything he's done wrong it's just this sort of
vague accusation that Job's friends are making like well you must have done
something wrong or these bad things wouldn't be happening to you we don't really know what
that is but you got these physical
problems, financial problems, family problems you must have done something wrong
you need to get right with God and Job's like I didn't do nothing and they're like you must have
because where there's smoke there's fire
or whatever but look if you would at verse 24 and what
Job says teach me and I will hold my tongue
and cause me to understand wherein I have heard he's saying you know
what specifically did I do wrong how forcible
or right words but what does your arguing reprove
do you imagine to reprove words and the speeches of one that is desperate
which are as wind yea you overwhelm the fatherless and you dig a
pit for your friend now therefore be content look upon me for it is
evident unto you if I lie and so we've got Job's
three friends so on the one hand we've got people that they
don't support their friends because they say well you know
he brought it on himself so I'm going to abandon him because he wasn't
perfect or whatever he made a mistake that's number one then one other
step of a worse friend is Job's friends who
basically don't even have a clear cut specific accusation
it's just this kind of vague well you must have done something
wrong but then we can even take it a step further of friends that are even worse than
Job's three friends the people who love to tell you how much they love you
while they're stabbing you in the back these are the worst kind of friends
the friends who they tell you know I love you so much
as they're stabbing you in the back this is the most sickening worst
kind of friend and here's a little test
we're going to do the love test this isn't one of those things where you
both grab the handle and put in a quarter and it tells you if you're compatible
but we're going to do the love test here's a love test
love worketh no ill to his neighbor
how's that love worketh no ill to his neighbor
therefore love is the fulfilling of the law people who are harming you
injuring you attacking you do not love you
because love works no ill to his neighbor
so people whose goal is to destroy you but I still
love you so much no you don't
and so some of my worst enemies over the years
have told me how much they love me as they're slandering me
stabbing me in the back gossiping about me attacking me publicly this is why the Bible
says let love be without dissimulation because there's a lot of
simulated or fake love out there you know Ezekiel chapter
and if you would turn to 1 John 3 here's a great verse in 1 John 3
while you turn there I'm going to read for you from Ezekiel
Ezekiel 33 31 says they come unto thee as the people cometh and they
sit before thee as my people right because Ezekiel's a preacher
and God's telling him you know these people they come and they sit and they sit before you as my people
and they hear thy words but they will not do them
because with their mouth they show much love
it says with their mouth they show much love but their heart goeth
after their covetousness
so with their mouth they show much love but their heart goeth after their covetousness
and there are multiple ways that you could legitimately interpret that you could say on the one hand
that they show much love toward god but really
they're just into material things right
Really, they just want money and material things and their heart is on the things of
this world.
But you know, another way that you could also legitimately interpret this is that they show
much love to Ezekiel, but really they envy Ezekiel, right?
Because your fake friends are usually the ones who envy you, or in our modern vernacular
you'd say they're jealous of you, right?
And so you get friends around you and, you know, there's this phenomenon of people hating
it when their friends become successful.
And it's like, what in the world?
You would think that if your friends succeed and thrive and do well, you're supposed to
be happy.
But there are people out there that actually want their friends to fail, and when their
friends are doing well, it bothers them.
That is the worst kind of friend.
That is the fakest friend ever.
But any way you slice it, showing much love with your mouth is different than having much
love in your heart, according to Ezekiel and many other scriptures in the Bible.
Look at what the Bible says in 1 John 3, verse 17.
But whoso hath this world's good, and seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up his
bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him?
My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue, but in deed and in truth.
Right?
So how are we supposed to show our love?
Just by saying, I love you, I love you, I love, love, love you.
Or by actually doing something that shows that we love someone.
It's not love in word, it's not love in tongue, but in deed and in truth.
Now of course, there's nothing wrong with expressing our love verbally.
That's a great way to express love, is to verbally tell someone I love you, but here's
the thing, at the end of the day though, actions speak louder than words.
Actions speak louder than words.
And when the Bible says, let us not love in word, neither in tongue, he's saying don't
only give lip service to love, you better do it in your actions, show that you love.
And again, this goes back to the love test, love worketh no ill to his neighbor.
Let us not love in word, neither in tongue, but in deed and in truth.
Now look, me personally, let me say this, I am not really personally the most affectionate
person in the world, not going to lie.
I'm just not a super duper affectionate person, except with my wife, I am extremely affectionate
with my wife.
That's true.
But other than that, I'm just not a super affectionate person and perhaps this comes
from the fact that when I was growing up, I wasn't, you know, my parents weren't super
affectionate with me.
It wasn't really like a super lovey-dovey, kissy, huggy, kind of a I love you kind of
a house.
But I did not doubt that my parents loved me.
I knew that my parents loved me.
I had a great childhood.
I had wonderful parents.
My parents were very good to me and looking back, I see all the sacrifices that they made
for me and how they did so much for me at their own expense.
You know, and I remember certain times when, uh, my dad or my mom would say or do something
that made me feel really loved and I realized like, okay, wow, my parents really do love
me.
This, you know, and it, but here's the thing.
We're not necessarily one of these super gushy families.
Now maybe you are.
Maybe you are part of a super gushy kind of a family.
Great.
But guess what?
Not everybody's like that and you can't just demand that everybody be like that or expect
everybody to be like that.
Okay.
So, you know, like I remember one time, you know, the pastor of a church that we went
to, I don't know if I should even be telling this story, but like the pastor of the church
wrote my dad like a note, which, you know, it's, you know, you write a note like, hey,
you know, I appreciate you or whatever, like kind of a note.
But I don't know.
I think it had like some smileys, maybe a heart or, and my dad's like, this seems kind
of gay.
You know, that's why my dad was like, what the heck, you know?
And we're like, no dad, it's, you know, he's just, it's just different people or, you know,
whatever.
And he kind of, he, on the one hand, he kind of appreciated the note, but it also kind
of just made him uncomfortable because he just wasn't used to getting like that level
of love from another man.
It was just like, what the heck just felt a little weird, you know?
But here's the thing.
It's, it's very, my point with that is that it's very subjective.
It's very subjective.
Different cultures are comfortable with different things, right?
You go to some cultures and you, you just met five seconds ago and they're kissing you
on the cheek and hugging you and you're just like, what the, get your hands off me, you
know?
Whereas, you know, it's, it's just, whereas other cultures aren't like that.
I mean, I think, I think in America in general, we're not a super duper touchy kissy huggy
super affectionate, uh, nation.
I don't think, you know, so some of this is kind of cultural.
Some of it is subjective.
It's different.
Everybody's different.
But you know what?
At the end of the day where the rubber meets the road, isn't a bunch of kissing and hugging
and talking anyway.
It's really your actions, you know?
And I do kiss and hug and show a lot of effects to my wife and tell her that I love her repeatedly.
But if I then went out and did actions that show that I don't love her, it wouldn't really
mean very much, would it?
Right?
If I'm out talking bad about her behind her back, if I'm out, you know, drinking up the
paycheck and I'm out committing adultery or doing all these horrible things, then you
know what?
That would mean nothing when I tell her, oh, I love you so much.
Here, let me kiss and hug you and whatever, right?
Because actions speak louder than words and we're not supposed to love in word and in
tongue, but in deed and in truth.
And so we show our love by our actions the most.
And here's what's funny is that, and you know, I heard this through the grapevine, so maybe
it's not even true.
Hopefully it's not even true.
But you know, I heard it through the grapevine that a certain person who left this church
was saying that I was not a loving pastor.
And I've actually heard this from multiple people, like multiple different people have
accused me of this.
And so I'm sure somebody's saying it because I've heard it from multiple sources, how I'm
not affectionate and I don't show enough love.
But what was funny is that this particular person who I heard a rumor that this person
said that I didn't love him.
So you know, if you come to me and ask me after the service, I'm not going to tell you
who it was because I don't even know if it's true because like I said, it was something
that I heard from someone else.
But what was ironic about hearing this was just that this particular person, I'm thinking,
when this person went through a hard time and was in need, I was just thinking about
everything we did for this person.
And I was just thinking like, I don't think any other church in America would have done
that for them.
And I was thinking of like concrete stuff that we did.
And I'm thinking like, well, that's funny.
If we don't love you, then why are we constantly doing things for you?
And why do we do this huge thing for you that probably no church in America would have done?
And then it's just like, you know, I mean, look, I can understand being accused of a
lot of things and I have a lot of personality flaws and I have a lot of, you know, things
that I need to work on.
Just like you got stuff that you need to work on.
We're all human.
We're all growing.
We're all trying to do the best we can to serve God.
And obviously we're at different stages of growth and we all have our strengths and weaknesses.
But it's just kind of funny for me to be accused of not loving someone who I had done so much
for.
You know, it's just kind of bizarre because in my book, doing something for somebody goes
a long way.
That shows I love you because I know I didn't just, especially because this is a woman.
What am I supposed to just be just showing all this love to a woman?
What the heck?
Like, first of all, I'm not going to be affectionate with any of the women of the church.
I mean, that would just, you know, so I'm not just going, oh, I love you so much.
But if I'm doing stuff for you, you know, you should maybe get the message.
I care about you.
I love you.
Hey, you need me.
You're going through a dark time.
You're going through a hard time.
You need help.
Here, I did this for you.
Oh, you don't love me.
Well, that's funny because I was always there for you and you weren't there for me.
When I needed your help, you weren't there.
When you needed my help, I was there.
And here's the thing.
Even if I'm not there for people personally, we got staff that's there for you.
And some people are like, well, you know, I was in the hospital and, you know, Brother
Segura visited me instead of Pastor Anderson or Brother Russell.
Look, if I were in the hospital, I would rather be visited by Brother Segura or Brother Russell
than by myself.
You know what I mean?
I just would because different people are better at different things.
You know what I mean?
It's like we're a team here.
I'm not going to play first base and second base and third base and pitch and shortstop
and I'm in left field and I'm, you know, I'm not just like a one man band.
I'm beating a drum with my foot playing guitar with the harmonica, trying to run the church
here.
No, we, you know, we got a staff.
We help people.
We do stuff for people.
We care about you.
We care about our members.
We love our church members.
And you know what?
Just recently, somebody had done something for me like literally, literally nine years
ago, somebody had done something for me in the past and the staff said, oh, hey, this
person wants help with whatever.
And I just said, do whatever for that person because they helped me nine years ago.
So do whatever they want, you know, give them whatever they want, give them whatever they
need, help them out in any way possible.
It's called loyalty, loyalty, right?
Because here's the thing.
You expect your friends to be there for you.
Your friends have been there for you in the past and then you're going to turn around
and not be there for them.
And then of course, what's the excuse?
Oh, well, you know, you did this to yourself because you're not perfect or whatever, right?
Well, you know what?
There's always a way.
There's always an excuse.
There's always a way to wiggle out of your responsibilities.
Just like people who want to wiggle out of the most important, uh, human loyalty outside
of loyalty to Christ is loyalty to your spouse, right?
I mean, you want to talk about being a good friend.
You want to talk about being loyal to your friend.
You know, the most important friend that you should be loyal to is whom?
You know, the most important friend you should be loyal to is your spouse.
You should be loyal to her or him.
And so that is the number one most important human relationship outside of the Lord.
I mean, that's the one person you cannot abandon, right?
I mean, you've got to be there for them.
You've got to be loyal to them.
And you know, but when people want to not be loyal and when people want to be unfaithful
and when people want to discard their spouse and move on to someone else, they're always
going to find a reason.
Aren't they?
Oh, you know, you don't understand, uh, you know, she wasn't affectionate enough to me
and I've, I've been a pastor for a long time, even before I was a pastor, I heard these
things.
Oh, you don't understand what it's like because my wife doesn't show me affection.
She doesn't, she doesn't tell me.
I mean, men have come to me repeatedly in my life and told me, my wife doesn't tell
me that she loves me.
She doesn't praise me.
She doesn't give me compliments.
She doesn't show any affection to me.
She's very cold to me.
And look, there are some cold women out there, unfortunately, in this world.
But here's the thing.
At the end of the day, you could use that as an excuse or you can be loyal to your friend
or you can do what the Bible says and be loyal to your spouse and it's till death do us part.
But if you want to find an excuse, you're always going to be able to find an excuse.
And here's the problem with modern day Christianity and even modern day independent fundamental
is Baptists, okay, is that they have in their statement of faith, oh, we're against divorce
except in cases of adultery, abuse or abandonment.
The triple A exemption clause.
And so you'll find statements of faith all across America in Baptist churches, independent
fundamental, King James only Baptist churches, adultery, abuse and abandonment are the three
ways out where they say we're against divorce except in these situations.
You know, I remember going to a giant independent fundamental Baptist conference, right?
It was pastors school in Hammond, Indiana.
There were thousands of pastors there from all over America.
Most of them are independent fundamental Baptists.
And I remember preacher and this is many, many years ago.
I mean, we're talking 20 years ago, literally 20 years ago.
And the preacher gets up and is yelling about how these are not grounds for divorce and
still death do us part.
It's for better or for worse.
You know, there are none of these grounds for divorce that people are claiming and you
could have heard a pin drop in there with just a few amens, one of them being mine.
It was like the preacher was up there preaching it right.
He wasn't getting a lot of love from the congregation on that particular point because so many fundamental
Baptist pastors across America are wrong on this.
They're wrong on this.
They twist scripture and get it to teach something that it does not teach and they have all these
excuses and all these grounds for divorce and that's why the divorce rate amongst Christians
is pretty much the same as the divorce rate among non-Christians.
Help us all.
Isn't that embarrassing?
That the divorce rate among Christians is pretty much the same as the divorce rate of
the people in this world.
It's that kind of stupid teaching that causes it, okay?
And that's why Faithful Word Baptist Church for the last 19 years has made this super
clear that you are to stay married till death do us part.
There are no grounds for divorce over adultery, abuse, and abandonment.
It's baloney.
And I'm not going to preach on it right now.
I've already done full sermons on it.
You can go listen to them.
But here's the problem with this trifecta, adultery, abuse, abandonment, is that anybody
can make their situation fit one of these three things.
Anybody can make it fit one of these three things because this is what you'll constantly
hear.
Oh, adultery, abuse, and abandonment.
Oh, adultery.
Oh, he looked at a woman to lust after her.
He looked at pornography or whatever.
Therefore, I'm going to abandon my spouse.
That's what you'll hear on that one, right?
Abandonment.
Oh, well, this is what I've heard out of an independent KJV pastor.
He said, well, he's already abandoned you emotionally.
He's you know, he's abandoned you emotionally because he's not showing affection or spending
time with you or whatever, right?
Abuse.
Okay.
Because now everything's abuse, verbal abuse, emotional abuse.
So basically every single couple could just pull out a mean thing that somebody said,
right?
Oh, my husband said something mean to me.
Verbal abuse.
My wife said something mean to me.
Verbal abuse.
Right?
Or, you know, for example, I read a story about in Colorado where a woman was put in
jail for 24 hours because she threw a raw hot dog at her husband.
So she threw a raw hot dog at him.
She went to jail and had to spend the night in jail.
And then she was sentenced.
She was convicted and sentenced and had to do anger management, community service, everything
for abusing her husband by throwing a raw hot dog at him.
You know, so it's just like, so the point is, and here's the thing you say, well, that's
not what they mean when they, well, when they say abuse, you know, they, it doesn't matter
what they mean because it's what the people in the congregation are hearing that matters.
It doesn't matter what they mean when they say, oh yeah, of course we're against divorce,
except in cases of adultery, abuse, and abandonment.
And everybody's just like, me, me, also me, because they just find a way to make it fit
their situation where they're like, oh, abandonment, yeah, he's gone.
He goes on, uh, you know, camping trips without me.
I feel abandoned.
Oh, he threw a raw hot dog at me in anger.
I feel abused.
You know, he said this to me.
She said this to me.
Oh, adultery?
Well, yeah, I caught him checking out a babe when we were walking down the street the other
day.
He committed adultery in his heart.
And you guys think, you think I'm being silly right now.
These are all real stories.
I am not making any, none of this is fiction.
I could give the names.
I'm not going to, because that'd be wicked for me to just, you know, blurt out people's
personal business.
But I'm telling you, I got people in mind right now who told me my wife is divorcing
me because I looked at a dirty magazine or my wife is divorcing me because, you know,
I supposedly abandoned her emotionally.
I mean, I've had a pastor tell me to my face, oh, well, he'd abandoned her emotionally to
my face.
Okay.
These are all real things, real stories.
That's why the divorce rate is through the roof because it's always so easy to find excuses
for why you're not going to be loyal to your friends and even the ultimate, most binding
friendship of all, which is marriage, why you're not going to be loyal to your spouse.
Because there's always, whenever you have this loophole, you're going to find it because
the reality is you just don't love your friend.
That's what it comes down to.
Here's the thing.
If you love your friend, you're not going to be ashamed of the chain and you're not
looking for, see, some people are looking for an excuse not to be loyal to their friend.
Other people are looking for an excuse to be loyal to their friend.
You know, I'm not looking for reasons to divorce my wife.
I'm looking for reasons to stay married to my wife and I'm finding them.
But here's the thing.
I'm not out there trying to, trying to figure out, so how can we make my situation fit this,
that you know what you'd say?
If I were doing that, if I were sitting there conniving like that, you'd say, well, you
don't love your wife.
And that's the real problem.
What does the Bible say?
Husbands love your wives.
The Bible says that wives are to love their husbands, love their children, okay?
And so the point is that, yeah, if you don't love your friend, of course you're going to
find an excuse not to go visit them when you're in Rome.
Of course you're not going to take the time to reach out, especially when it's so easy
to reach out.
Now it's a matter of just picking up the phone, it's a matter of sending a text, it's a matter
of sending an email or whatever.
You know, Onesiphorus is willing to jump through hoops to make sure that Paul knows, hey, somebody's
still supporting you.
I know all they that are in Asia have turned away from you.
Not everybody, because I'm with you, Paul.
He made a point, and it was, it would have been easy to send a text for us today, but
even when it was hard, Onesiphorus still did it.
But the point is, if you don't love your friend, you're not going to be loyal.
If you don't love your wife, if you don't love your husband, you're going to look for
excuses to dissolve that union that is not supposed to be dissolved by anything other
than death.
Okay?
It's supposed to be a lifelong commitment, and yet everybody's got an excuse and a reason
why.
And by the way, this other thing now, and by the way, nothing new under the sun, 20
some years ago I had a pastor tell me to my face.
He said, I've never in my X amount of years of ministry, he said, I've never counseled
anyone to get a divorce, I've never told anyone to divorce their spouse, and he, this was
like a point of pride with him.
As I watched person after person after person get divorced under his ministry, while he's
their pastor, they're divorcing all, they, they divorcing everybody.
Why?
Because this is what he wouldn't, he would never counsel anyone to get a divorce, but
he would counsel sometimes a separation.
What kind of dumb crap is that?
Like, oh, well, you can't get a divorce, but you can get separated.
Really?
Because last time I checked, the Bible says, let not the wife depart from her husband.
Wouldn't separation be like departing from your husband?
What is that?
Like, well, you know, you can't get a divorce, but you could get separated.
And he told, he, this guy told specifically a woman, oh, your husband has marijuana in
the house, separate.
Now look, I hate marijuana.
I hate drugs.
I hate it.
Okay.
I don't want anything to do with it.
I'm against it.
I think it's stupid.
It's wicked.
It's wrong.
But if your husband smokes pot, he is still your husband.
You are still married to your husband and you can't say, well, I'm going to separate
from him until he quit smoking pot.
He's probably smoking pot from dealing with you.
Because of the way that you are with that attitude.
No, I'm just kidding.
But the, but the point is, the point is though, I'm super good.
Look, I, I, one time when I was a teenager, I was dating a girl briefly and I found out
that the girl that I was dating tried marijuana one time at a party.
I just found out she took one, one little puff.
I don't even know if she inhaled Bill Clinton.
But basically she took one little hit off of a marijuana cigarette at a party and I
immediately broke up with her over that.
And she's like, oh, come on.
It was just, I just, just one little puff.
It was no big deal.
I'm not going to smoke pot.
I'm just like, nope, I'm done here.
I'm done.
That's a red flag.
I'm done.
Same person went on to become a drug addict, literally, literally.
And you know, I believe that she's sober now, so praise God for that.
Thank God for that.
But, but you know, guess that red flag did mean something because she did ultimately
get into drugs.
So I'm not defending drugs at all, but this is what people say, oh, you're defending drugs
because you, you, you're against the separation.
No, I'm against separation because I'm against separation because that's your spouse is till
death do us part and you stay married and look, I'm 100% against pot.
I hate it.
It's wicked.
It's stupid.
It's saying, oh, you got to go get your own apartment or you're going to go get your husband
his own apartment because he smokes pot or, and look, forget pot, fill in the blank with
any of your other 50 million excuses.
Go ahead and fill in the blank of whatever it is.
Well, you just gotta get separated separate folks when you get separated.
That's just a stepping stone toward getting divorced is all that is.
You know, it's just basically like a dress rehearsal for being divorced because it's
like, okay, now we're going to separate.
Now we're having even less of a relationship.
Now we're getting used to living separately.
Now we're used to paying the separate bill of having this apartment and this house and
everything, and it ultimately ends up leading to divorce.
It's wrong.
It's sin.
It's stupid.
It's retarded.
Other than that, it's a great idea, but just, it's, it's just wrong.
So you know, we got a bunch of hypocritical phony pastors out there preaching, oh, divorce.
Yeah, we don't do that.
But separation, you know, and then it's like, yeah, you can just, you can just abandon your
wife for months, but just don't get divorced.
You can abandon your, your, your husband for months, but just go to divorce.
And then they turn around and then all of a sudden after they basically prescribed abandonment
by saying you can be separated, which here's another word for separation, abandonment.
And then they're going to turn around and say, oh, well now you have grounds for divorce
because of abandonment.
So it's like they're telling one person to abandon.
They're telling other people you can get divorced if you're abandoned.
And then they're saying, we didn't, we didn't tell anyone to get divorced.
We just told people that it's okay to abandon your spouse and that if you're abandoned,
you can get divorced.
And then by the way, there's also this doctrine that says, well, you know, if they divorce
you, that's on them.
Don't you divorce them, but if they divorce you, it's not, I've seen couples literally
in an arms race to try to get the other person to divorce them.
Like I, cause neither one wants to pull the trigger.
Neither one wants to go down in history as the one who initiated the divorce.
So then basically they just try to just treat the other person like dirt.
And then eventually one of them divorces and then they're like, oh, well he divorced me.
She divorced me.
I didn't do that.
You know, at the end of the day, God's looking at your heart and he knows whether you have
love for God and love for your neighbor and whether you have love for your wife, love
for your husband and love for your friends.
And I know I kind of went off on a tangent about marriage.
Let's come, let's just end the sermon by getting off of marriage, coming back to just your
friends, right?
Because yeah, marriage is one subset of this category.
Okay.
But now let's broaden things out again.
Okay.
I'm not only going to be loyal to my wife only.
I'm also going to be loyal to my friends.
That means people who've been there for me in the past, people who've done stuff for
me, you know, I'm gonna be loyal to them.
I want to be loyal to my parents.
I want to be loyal to other people who throughout history have been good to me, done good unto
me and been helpful to me, been friends to me and people that, and look, even people
who haven't done anything for me, people who I just have made them my friend and decided
that I'm going to be their friend.
Well then you know what?
I'm going to be a friend to those people.
And you just say, well, you know, I just don't really, I'm just not really into friends or
I'm not really into having friends.
Well, you know what?
I'm sorry that you're such a sad person is such a pathetic person because honestly, friendship
is supposed to be part of life and it's funny how John had friends and and Paul had friends
and Peter had friends.
Jesus had friends, you know, so if Jesus had friends and everything, he's all, I just don't
really have any friends.
I'm just not really into friendship.
Well, you know what?
You should be because someday you're going to wish you had a friend and you could just
go live alone with your cats and you have no friends and you're not in church and you
don't have any relationships with anybody because it's just you and your dog, man's
best friend.
Dog is not man's best friend.
Okay?
If dog is your best friend, I feel sorry for you.
First of all, it's came and lived that long because of how dog years work.
That's not a lifelong friendship, but it's just like, Oh, the dog is my best friend.
You know, these people who say that their dog is their best friend and that the dog
is man's best friend and I like dogs better than people.
It's not that they love dogs more than we all love dogs a little bit.
You know, all of us, you know, enjoy a pet from time to time.
Okay.
Except in our family.
But other than that, but here's the, here's the thing.
You know what they're really saying is that they don't love people.
They say like, Oh, I just love dogs.
We actually all love dogs the same.
You just hate people cause you're misanthropic and have a bad attitude.
You know, we need to go through life building some quality relationships.
Marriage is a great one.
Relationships, church, family mentor ships and discipleship and things like that.
Those are relationships that we, it's not good for the man to be alone and obviously
in a church of several hundred people, you're not going to be able to just be buddies and
close with everybody.
But you know what?
You should have some people in life that you're close to and not just try to go through life
alone.
Right?
You should have some meaningful relationships, some close relationships in your life.
And you say, well, you know, nobody loves me.
But a man that had friends must show himself friendly.
Sometimes you have to take that first step to initiate those friendships.
And you know what?
If you have friendships and maybe right now you could think of some friends that you've
had for many years or even decades, friends that you've had for a long time.
Maybe you should do a little self check.
How good of a friend are you?
Do you check on that person?
Do you ever reach out to that person?
Do you ever text that person?
Do you ever call that person?
Do you ever get together with that person or are you, you're not willing to drive the
15 minutes all day?
You know, they came all the way to Glendale, Arizona, but you're like, nah, it's too far.
I live in Gilbert, you know, people, people are like that, right?
Oh, you're in surprise, Arizona.
Oh, sorry.
Too far from me.
I'm in Apache junction.
I know you came from Timbuktu, but I just can't drive that 40 minutes.
Now look, we're all busy.
We can't be friends with everybody.
I get it.
But you know what?
The least you could do is at least be loyal to your spouse.
Have a few friends that you're loyal to.
And other than that, you know what?
Be a blessing to the people around you and don't be this backstabbing, gossiping, slandering
jerk.
That's the least you could do.
You say, well, I'm kind of a lame friend.
I don't reach out much.
I don't call much.
I don't text much.
Okay.
At least you can shut up and not talk bad about your so-called friend.
Amen.
At least you could not bite the hand that feeds you.
You say, oh, I'm not really that good of a son.
I'm not that good of a daughter because I don't really reach out to my parents that
much.
I don't spend time with my parents.
Okay.
How about this?
At least you could stop trashing your parents to other people, right?
And lying about them and talking smack about them.
And you know what's funny is that throughout my life, it's so funny because when people
used to come up to me and say, oh, my parents abused me as a kid, I always just assumed
that they were telling the truth.
I thought they were like sexually abused or like, you know, that they were like chained
up in the basement or something.
You know, I thought that somebody was like putting out cigarettes on their arm or something.
You know what's funny?
And now I realize that like 90 some percent of those people were lying to me and were
just a bunch of ungrateful little snots.
And you know, I already knew this about marriage because I've been pastor for 19 years and
every single time a woman walked up to me in the last 19 years of pastoring, every time
a woman walked up to me and said, oh, my husband abused me, I never took that at face value
ever.
I never one time just said, oh, I'm so sorry to hear that.
Oh, that's terrible.
I always said, oh, really?
What did he do?
Oh, really?
What exactly happened?
Oh, well.
And it virtually never panned out.
And look, I know that there are women being abused.
I know there are children being abused.
I get that.
I'm not making light of that.
You know who's making light of it?
You who cry wolf are the ones who are making light of it.
You who make up crap about your husband and lie because you're trying to justify divorce.
You're the ones who are downplaying the people who are actual victims.
By comparing your dumb little petty crap to real abuse, you're the one who's making light
of it.
Not me.
I'm not making light of it because I'm telling you, I've been pastor for 19 years and have
them come up to me and it virtually never panned out.
Virtually always they were lying or twisting the truth in some way.
So I was smart enough to know that about women who've been divorced from their husbands are
going to lie and say that they've been abused a huge percentage of the time.
And then I would dig in and say, oh, really?
What exactly happened?
What did you do?
What did he do?
Oh, oh, yeah.
Turns out you're not a victim.
But unfortunately, when people told me that about their parents, I wasn't smart enough
to realize that children do the exact same thing.
And they just go around talking about how they're, oh, it's such a bad childhood, oh,
it's abuse.
And 90% of the time they're full of crap.
And you say, oh, we just need to believe all women.
No, because here's what's not fair about that.
Oh, let's just believe all women, believe all children, believe every victim.
You know, how about this?
How about believe the falsely accused?
How about this?
How about innocent until proven guilty for the perpetrators?
How about that?
Because I thought that was a thing.
Isn't it true that like the person who's on trial, the person who's being accused of something
aren't they innocent until proven guilty?
But now in our society, we flipped that on its head where now every victim is telling
the truth until proven to be a liar.
Wrong, false.
It's the person who's being accused of a crime that is guilty until proven innocent, last
time I checked.
And so this whole hashtag me too, believe all women, believe all children, believe everything
you hear is unbiblical garbage.
And it makes light of people who've actually really gone through something real when you
bring up all this fake, petty garbage.
Okay.
And so all I have to say this, be loyal to the people in your life, but especially we're
focusing this morning on being loyal to your friends.
And I didn't even, I, that was only three of my five pages.
So come back tonight for more loyalty talk.
Let's bow our heads down.
We're in prayer.
Father, we thank you so much for your word Lord.
And I thank you for the friendships that I've enjoyed over the years and I especially
thank you for my wonderful wife and the friendship that I have with her.
But Lord God, I pray that every single person who's here or under the sound of my voice
would understand the importance of showing kindness to those who have showed kindness
unto them, reciprocating good for good and not evil for good, for being loyal to their
friends, loyal to their father's friends, and cultivating meaningful relationships
in their life.
And more important than having friends, being a friend and not being like those deceitful
Brooks in the book of Job that are sort of a seasonal thing, only when you don't really
need them that much, Lord God, help us to be friends in need.
And in Jesus' name we pray, Amen.
Amen.
All right, ladies and gentlemen, take your hymnals please.
We'll turn to hymn number 10.
Hymn number 10.
Number 10 near the cross.
Hymn number 10.
This one begins, Jesus keep me near the cross, they're a precious fountain.
Hymn number 10.
Sing it out on that verse.
Number 10.
Jesus, keep me near the cross, they're a precious fountain, free to all a healing stream, flows
from Calvary's mountain, in the cross, in the cross, be my glory ever, till my raptured
soul shall find, rest beyond the river, near the cross, a trembling soul, love and mercy
shall be found me, there the bright and morning star sheds its beams around me, in the cross,
be my glory ever, till my raptured soul shall find, rest beyond the river, near the cross,
the lamb of God, bring its feast before me, help me walk from day to day, with its shadows
for me, in the cross, in the cross, be my glory ever, till my raptured soul shall find,
rest beyond the river, near the cross, I'll watch and wait, hoping, trusting ever, till
I reach the golden strand, just beyond the river, in the cross, in the cross, be my glory
ever, till my raptured soul shall find, rest beyond the river.
Good singing this morning. We are dismissed.
Thank you.