And Jethro, the priest of Midian, Moses' father-in-law, heard of all that God had done for Moses, and for Israel his people,
and that the Lord had brought Israel out of Egypt. Then Jethro, Moses' father-in-law, took Zipporah, Moses' wife,
after he had sent her back, and her two sons, of which the name of the one was Gershom,
for he said, I've been an alien in a strange land, and the name of the other was Eliezer,
for the God of my father said he was my help, and delivered me from the sword of Pharaoh.
And Jethro, Moses' father-in-law, came with his sons and his wife unto Moses into the wilderness,
where he encamped at the mount of God. And he said unto Moses, I, thy father-in-law,
Jethro, am come unto thee, and thy wife, and her two sons with her.
And Moses went out to meet his father-in-law, and did obeisance, and kissed him,
and they asked each other of their welfare, and they came into the tent.
And Moses told his father-in-law all that the Lord had done unto Pharaoh and to the Egyptians for Israel's sake,
and all the travail that had come upon them by the way, and how the Lord delivered them.
And Jethro rejoiced for all the goodness which the Lord had done to Israel,
whom he had delivered out of the hand of the Egyptians.
And Jethro said, Blessed be the Lord, who hath delivered you out of the hand of the Egyptians,
and out of the hand of Pharaoh, who hath delivered the people from under the hand of the Egyptians.
Now I know that the Lord is greater than all gods,
for in the thing wherein they dealt proudly, he was above them.
And Jethro, Moses' father-in-law, took a bird offering and sacrifices for God,
and Aaron came and all the elders of Israel to eat bread with Moses' father-in-law before God.
And it came to pass on the morrow that Moses sat to judge the people,
and the people stood by Moses from the morning unto the evening.
And when Moses' father-in-law saw all that he did to the people, he said,
What is this thing that thou doest to the people?
Why sittest thou thyself alone, and all the people stand by thee from morning unto even?
And Moses said unto his father-in-law, Because the people come unto me to inquire of God.
When they have a matter, they come unto me, and I judge between one and another,
and I do make them know the statutes of God and his laws.
And Moses' father-in-law said unto him, The thing that thou doest is not good.
Thou wilt surely wear away, both thou and this people that is with thee.
For this thing is too heavy for thee, thou art not able to perform at thyself alone.
Harken now unto my voice, I will give thee counsel, and God shall be with thee.
Be thou for the people to God, that thou mayest bring the causes unto God.
And thou shalt teach them ordinances and laws, and shalt show them the way wherein they must walk,
and the work that they must do.
Moreover, thou shalt provide out of all the people able men, such as fear God, men of truth, hating covetousness,
and place such over them to be rulers of thousands and rulers of hundreds, rulers of fifties, and rulers of tens.
And let them judge the people at all seasons, and it shall be that every great matter they shall bring unto thee.
But every small matter they shall judge, so shall it be easier for thyself, and they shall bear the burden with thee.
If thou shalt do this thing, and God command thee so, then thou shalt be able to endure,
and all this people shall also go to their place in peace.
So Moses hearkened to the voice of his father-in-law, and did all that he had said.
And Moses chose able men out of all Israel, and made them heads over the people,
rulers of thousands, rulers of hundreds, rulers of fifties, and rulers of tens,
and they judged the people at all seasons.
The hard cases they brought unto Moses, but every small matter they judged themselves.
And Moses led his father-in-law to part, and he went his way into his own land,
and as far as that word of prayer.
Father, thank you so much for our church again, dear God,
and for the wonderful day that we had so far,
and the many people that were saved out door to door, soul winning,
and just the joy of being gathered together with your people,
and the people that believe what we believe.
And Father, we just pray that you please just speak to us through your word,
fill us with your spirit now, and as we look within your word,
guide and direct me as I preach, dear God.
And in Jesus' name I pray, amen.
Now this chapter, we see the most that we ever see about this character named Jethro,
that's introduced in verse number one, it says,
When Jethro, the priest of Midian, Moses' father-in-law,
heard of all that God had done for Moses and for Israel his people,
and that the Lord had brought Israel out of Egypt,
that Jethro, Moses' father-in-law, took Zipporah, Moses' wife,
after he had sent her back, and of course he comes,
and he brings Moses' wife and children back to him.
Now just to bring you up to speed in the story,
if you remember, Moses fled from Egypt
when he was 40 years old because he killed a man.
He saw one of the Egyptians beating one of the Hebrews,
and he decided to step in, he looked both ways,
and he killed the guy with his bare hands.
So as soon as he realized that people knew that he had done that,
he had to leave because he didn't want to be killed by Pharaoh
for committing murder.
So he escaped, and he dwelled in the backside of the desert for 40 years,
and while he was there, he ended up marrying this man's daughter,
and her name was Zipporah, and of course they had a few children together.
And then God came and spoke to Moses and the burning bush,
and Moses came to Egypt and brought the people out of Egypt.
He said, you know, let my people go, and brought all the plagues,
and did all the miracles that God sent him to do,
and preached everything he was supposed to preach.
Well, he's brought the children of Israel out of Egypt now,
and if you remember, the Bible says there were 600,000 men,
not counting women and children,
that came with them out of Egypt when they left Egypt.
Well, if it's 600,000 men, not counting women and children,
we're looking at definitely millions of people,
at least a few million people.
So Moses has brought these millions of people,
and right now he's guiding them and directing them through the wilderness,
on the way to the promise land.
And along the way, of course, there are a lot of challenges and things that come up,
where people are having disputes, people don't know what to do,
and Moses has to lead and guide these millions of people.
Now, that would be a pretty stressful position to be placed into,
where all of a sudden you're just going from being a shepherd
out in the wilderness for the last 40 years,
and all of a sudden you're just in charge of two million people,
or three million people,
and all their problems, they're going to bring all their problems to you,
and all their disputes and all their fussing and murmuring and complaining,
they're going to bring it to you.
So that's the position that Moses finds himself in, ruling over these people.
Well, his father-in-law shows up,
and his father-in-law brings his wife and two children with him.
Now, when he initially went to Egypt to confront Pharaoh,
he brought the family with him,
but he had sent them away at some point.
He appeared for their life, because of all the things that were happening in Egypt,
he probably just thought it would be safer for them to go somewhere else.
So he sent them back to Jethro,
so Jethro brings them to be reunited with Moses,
so that Moses can be reunited with his wife and two sons.
Well, when Jethro shows up,
he's really excited when he hears about all the miracles that God did,
and the crossing of the Red Sea, and all the plagues on Egypt.
He's really excited about it.
He thinks it's great, and they're rejoicing together,
and Jethro, he's the priest of Midian,
but now all of a sudden he knows for sure that God is the one true God.
I'm glad he finally figured that out.
But he said, now I know, when he heard the whole story,
now I know that God is the one true God.
But anyway, the next day, look at verse 13.
So here they are, they rejoiced, they told all the stories.
Jethro says, hey, man, the Lord is greater than all gods, and so forth.
Look at verse 13, it says,
it came to pass on the morrow that Moses sat to judge the people,
and the people stood by Moses from morning until the evening.
And when Moses' father-in-law saw all that he did to the people,
he said, what is this thing that thou doest to the people?
Why sitest thou thyself alone,
and all the people stand by thee from morning until evening?
And Moses stood unto his father-in-law,
because the people come unto me to inquire of God.
So Jethro sees what Moses is doing,
and just literally, from morning to night, he just sits there alone,
and all these people are coming to him.
I mean, there's millions of people in the nation,
and they're all just lined up,
just huge groups of people are lined up,
just with their problems, with their issues, with questions.
They don't know what to do.
They don't know what the answer is.
And so he's going to inquire of God for them,
and tell them what God's word says,
and explain to them what's right and wrong,
and explain to them what they're supposed to be doing on an individual basis.
That's what's going on in the story.
Well, when Jethro hears this explanation,
he says in verse 17,
And Moses' father-in-law said unto him,
The thing that thou doest is not good.
Thou wilt surely wear away,
both thou and this people that is with thee,
for this thing is too heavy for thee.
Thou art not able to perform with thyself alone.
He says, this is a bad idea for you to do this,
because you're going to get tired.
You're going to get worn out,
and they're going to get worn out,
and they're going to get sick of it.
This is just a bad way to leave.
And Moses' father-in-law was right,
because he explains to him a better way to leave.
And he says, you know what,
if God commands you that it's okay to do this,
this is what you ought to do.
And he gives him great advice.
That's the advice that he ends up doing.
Later in the book of Deuteronomy,
it's codified by God as, hey,
this is the way it's supposed to be.
And so Jethro had some great advice here
for many different reasons.
Now, let me just give you a few examples
of what I think the Bible is trying to teach here.
First of all, I've been in a lot of churches
where this is exactly what happened.
Basically, let's say the pastor is like Moses.
He's the spiritual leader.
He's the one who knows the Word of God,
and he can explain to people
what is right and what is wrong based upon God's Word.
I've literally been to churches where every single service,
there is a line of people to speak to the pastor
and to get counseling and advice from the pastor.
And they're basically bringing them all their problems,
all their issues, all their situations.
I used to go to a really big church,
and there were literally lines of 30 to 40 people sometimes.
30 or 40 people in line with problems.
And here's the thing.
They're in line again and again and again
and again and again and again.
A lot of the same people.
And just week after week,
I mean, Sunday morning, big, long line.
Sunday night, big, long line.
Wednesday night, big, long line.
To go and to figure out, what do I do?
What's right?
I don't know what to do.
I need advice. I need help.
Now, obviously, that is not an efficient way to lead.
Let me explain to you why.
Because it makes a lot more sense.
This is exactly what Jethro explains to Moses.
He says, look, Moses,
instead of sitting there and explaining to each person,
okay, here's what you need to do in that situation.
He said, here's what you need to do.
You need to teach the people.
Look at verse 20.
He says, thou shalt teach them ordinances and laws,
and shalt show them the way wherein they must walk
and the work that they must do.
He said, first of all,
you need to just get everybody together and just teach them
and just explain to them what's right and wrong
and just preach to them what God's laws are
and make them aware of what the Bible says, first of all.
Then they're not going to have to come and ask you
over and over again if you just lay it out for them
and teach them clearly.
And then he said, number two,
you need to put leaders over the people.
And he said, whether they be rulers of thousands
or rulers of 100 or rulers of 50s or rulers of 10,
and those people can guide and direct them
and lead them and answer their questions and help them
so that everybody doesn't have to come to you all the time
to ask you every little thing.
He said, all the little everyday things,
first of all, if you just teach them the Word of God,
they'll already know what to do in those situations.
And then if they do have a problem or a question
that they can't figure out,
they can talk to somebody else that's lower on the totem pole.
They can talk to their dad,
or they can talk to just a leader in their family
or somebody that's closer to them in their circle.
Or if there's just a really hard problem
that nobody knows the answer to,
then they can bring that to you,
and you can just deal with the really hard problems
because let's face it, 99% of problems,
it's not going to take Moses to figure it out.
It's not going to be that complicated.
So it's just a waste of Moses' time
to keep telling people the same thing over and over again,
the same advice, the same answer.
Now, this is why,
and I'm going to make some other applications with this
on why this is an important facet of leadership,
this goes to parenting, and this goes to being a pastor,
and this goes to being a leader in your job.
I mean, this is just a principle of leadership
we see here being taught by Jethro in the Bible.
You see, if we preach the Word of God in this church
the way that it ought to be preached,
and we preach everything in the book
and make it clear to people,
people aren't going to have as much confusion,
and they're not going to have so many problems
that they're lined up every week trying to figure out,
what am I supposed to do with my life?
I mean, look, isn't something wrong,
just think about this for a minute,
isn't something wrong with a church
when everybody in the church is lined up
or half the people or a fifth of the people in the church
are lined up trying to figure out what to do,
how to live, I don't know what's right,
I don't know what to do,
I don't know how to fix my marriage,
I don't know how to raise my kids,
what do I do about this, what do I do about that?
Well, doesn't the Bible have the answers?
And if the Bible's being preached clearly from the pulpit,
that's not going to be that way,
because honestly, I don't have a big line of people
coming to ask me, you say,
well, people just don't want your advice, pastor.
Maybe so.
Either way, I'm glad I don't have that big line.
But you know, when people do come to me
and ask me for advice,
you know what, a lot of times I tell them,
because usually if people come to this church,
they're hearing so much Bible preaching
and they've been so encouraged to read the Bible on their own
that they're not just clueless about how to live their life.
And so when they do come to me and ask me something,
usually I just say to them, what do you think?
What do you think you should do?
What do you think?
And then they just, oh, I think this, yeah, exactly.
Because you already know the answer,
it's in the Bible, it's clear,
it's there for all of us,
there's no special magic thing that I know
that you can't figure out on your own.
Now a lot of these people at this stage,
they haven't heard all of God's word.
They haven't heard all the commandments.
They haven't heard the statutes.
And that's why Jethro said,
the first thing you're going to have to do
is preach them the truth.
The first thing you have to do
is teach them what's right and wrong.
Then once they've been taught,
they're not going to need as much help.
And when they do,
they don't necessarily need to go to you to get it.
They can go to anybody to get it.
They can go to their own dad or their own husband.
Like the Bible talks about wives in 1 Corinthians 14.
If they have a question,
they should be able to ask their own husband at home.
It says they shouldn't have to go ask the pastor.
They should be able to ask their own husband.
No, because everybody should study the Bible
and know what the Bible says
and understand the truth from God's word.
Not just one guy that just has all the answers,
that can just tell us everything
about how we need to live our lives and so forth.
And so you see, now people will say this.
People have come to me before and they say,
I need marriage counseling.
Do you do marriage counseling?
I just tell them no.
I say no.
I say, I don't do marriage counseling.
Oh, but you don't understand.
Let me give you my situation.
I'm like, I don't want to know your situation.
I say, here's my marriage counseling.
It's Sunday morning, Sunday night, and Wednesday night.
When I preach what the Bible teaches about marriage,
and that's all I know.
And anything else beyond that,
it's just my opinion and it's meaningless
and it's not going to help you anyway.
Why don't you just go with what the Bible says?
And it's the same for everybody.
And people say, oh, but I have a special situation
and you don't know what I'm going through.
Look, the Bible works for everybody.
It's the same answer for everybody.
Now if you would, go to 1 Corinthians 10.
1 Corinthians 10.
While you're turning to 1 Corinthians 10,
I'll read for you from 1 John 2.
Of course, a famous verse.
The Bible reads,
But the anointing which ye have received of him
abideth in you,
and ye need not that any man teach you.
But as the same anointing teacheth you of all things,
and is truth, and is no lie,
and even as it hath taught you, ye shall abide in him.
The Bible says that you can be taught
what you need to be taught,
just from the Bible itself,
with the Holy Spirit as your guide.
And not necessarily have to have somebody
always holding your hand every step of the way
and telling you, okay, now do this,
now do this, now do this.
Now here's the thing about children.
Children have to be told what to do
every step of the way.
Right?
You can't just tell them,
you can't just give them a big job
and just say, clean your room.
Except we're just dealing with today.
And we dealt with it other days.
Okay.
You can't just say, clean your room.
Now if you tell an adult, clean this room,
they should be able to figure out,
okay, you know, what that means
and what all that entails.
Are you listening, kids?
All right.
But you know, you just give this to a child.
Just clean your room.
Okay, it's clean.
And then you come in and you have to say,
what about this?
What about that?
What about this?
What about over here?
What about all this junk?
Oh, oh, that?
Oh, you meant for me to sweep the floor?
Oh, I was supposed to dust?
Oh, I was supposed to put these things away?
Oh, you're talking about that dirty laundry?
Oh, you're talking about the big pile of junk in my bed?
I'm going to have to say that.
Okay.
And they have to be shepherded and guided
every little step of the way
because they're a child, okay?
But your goal is to teach them beyond that point
to where they can figure out what to do on their own
because it's almost just as hard
to guide them every step of putting that step away
and you might as well just do it yourself.
Yeah.
And the temptation is there to just do it yourself.
The temptation is there to just say,
you know what, next to this,
I'm just going to go clean your room for you
since you won't clean it, since you can't figure this out,
and it's more work to explain to you how to do it,
I'm just going to do it myself.
Now this is what a lot of pastors do.
They don't want to teach,
instead of teaching their people how to think,
teaching them what's right, teaching them the Bible,
teaching them what's wrong,
they give their little feel-good sermon
that teaches them nothing from the Bible,
that doesn't teach them even who Jethro is.
They think Jethro is from the Beverly Hillbillies
because they've never heard any kind of preaching,
they've never read the Bible on their own.
They don't even know these things
and it's easier just to say,
okay, what do you do?
Okay, do this, do this,
and they're just going to control everybody's life
like a puppet or something,
like, okay, now do this, now do this.
Oh, what do you need this week?
Okay, I decided two weeks ago.
How's that working out?
Okay, now do this, this, this, and this.
It's the same thing.
You've got to teach people to do things on their own,
even in a job.
You know, you don't want,
you can't be such a micromanager.
You're never going to get things done.
You're never going to grow.
Your business can't grow if you have a couple of workers
and you have to watch them all day long.
You've got to teach them how to do things on their own.
Now, my dad, you know, I did electrical work with him for years,
but he never taught me how to be an electrician.
I spent years and years working with him
and I learned very little.
Now, I'm not criticizing my dad
that my dad is the best electrician I've ever seen,
but he's not a good teacher.
And he flat out will tell you,
those who can do and those who can't, teach.
That's his slogan.
And so he has this thing where he won't let you do stuff.
Like, you'll start to do it,
and he's afraid you're going to do it wrong.
So, you know, just let me do it.
You know what I mean?
Just let me do it myself.
It's just easier just to do it myself.
Yet, it is easier to do it yourself,
but you're not teaching when you do it all yourself.
You know, there's a lot of things that I could do myself,
but I like to have other people do them.
You know, I like to have other people,
I like to involve other people in the search.
I like to have other people lead the singing
or do announcements or lead solo winning
or lead this class or do this or preach this,
because the one who's doing the work
is the one who's doing the learning.
And, you know, we've got to learn to delegate things
to other people and teach people how to do things.
And the Bible said in Timothy, he said,
the things that thou hast learned of me among many witnesses,
the same commit thou to faithful men
who shall be able to teach others also.
You know, you've got to pass on to people
the knowledge and the training to do things on their own.
You can't be like Moses was where you're just in charge
and everything rises and falls on you.
It's not good enough for a million people,
for two million people.
You have to train others to teach at a lower level
and to lead at a lower level
and to be the up-and-coming leaders,
to be the Joshua that's going to take over
and to be the Othniel, the son of Kienaz
that's going to take over
and these other men that are going to rise up.
You see, people need to learn,
and did I return to 1 Corinthians?
People need to learn how to do things on their own
and not always lean on somebody else to do it for them,
whether it's the pastor, whether it's their parents,
whether it's the boss at work.
You've got to teach people to do things on their own
and to learn on their own.
Look at 1 Corinthians 10, verse 13.
There is no temptation taken you,
but such as is common to man.
But God is faithful who will not suffer you
to be tempted above that you are able,
but will with the temptation also make a way to escape
that you may be able to bear it.
So you see, there's nothing new under the sun,
and all these different people that are coming to Moses
with all their problems,
they think that their problems are unique.
As they lined up from morning to night,
they came unto Moses with problems and with issues,
and they thought, this is unique.
You know, nobody's dealt with this.
I don't know what the answer is.
But see, Moses has probably heard it 50 times.
The same thing over and over again.
That's what Jethro is saying.
Why don't you just teach people what's right,
teach them the work that they're supposed to do,
and then just put some people in charge that know more.
They can guide them and direct them in these things
because there's nothing new under the sun.
And you see, the reason I don't do a bunch of counseling,
and the reason I don't have people lined up to talk to me
is because your problems are pretty much the same
as everybody else's problems, honestly.
Say, oh, my children are rebellious,
and they're off the deep end.
Well, you know what?
There are plenty of other people in this world
whose children are rebellious and off the deep end.
Oh, my wife, she won't listen to me.
She won't respect me.
She won't obey me.
Well, you know what?
I guarantee you, you're not the only one.
Oh, my husband won't fix stuff around the house.
You know, oh, join the club.
Oh, my husband works too much.
Oh, my husband works too little.
It's the same thing.
It's just the same things over and over and over again,
the same problems.
There's no temptation that's taken you,
but such as is common to man.
Any temptations and trials and situations
that you're going through,
it's the same thing that are accomplished in your brother
which are in the world, the same problems,
the same issues, the same trials.
And that's why God's principles work for everything.
And that's why you won't see me big on counseling.
To me, when a bunch of people are lined up for counseling,
it just tells me that the Word of God's not being preached
clearly from the pulpit
or else people would know what to do
because honestly, the reason people don't line up and talk,
it's not because they're afraid to talk to me
because I'm a pretty approachable person.
I'm pretty easy to talk to.
It's because they already know the answer before they ask me
because they read it in the Bible on their own.
And maybe sometimes people come to me with really hard things
and sometimes there are hard things
and maybe I might know a little more about something,
but it's just not that often
because so much of the answer
is just right there in front of us in the Bible.
We already know the answer.
But today, counseling has become the big popular thing.
It's like a buzzword.
Now pastors are putting ads in the Yellow Pages
under counseling, just counseling.
We offer marriage counseling
and all these different types of counseling.
You know, I don't believe that it's necessary.
I believe that what we need is preaching, not counseling.
We need preaching.
What people need is to come to church
and to learn what's right, to learn God's laws.
And honestly, if you're obeying God's laws,
that'll fix a lot of the messed up stuff in your life.
So I don't know what to do.
My marriage is falling apart.
Well, are you obeying God's laws in your marriage?
Are you going to church?
Are you reading your Bible?
Are you praying?
Are you winning the loss?
Are you going soul winning?
Are you watching filth on your television
when God said not to set any wicked thing before your eyes?
Are you out partying and drinking and reveling
when the Bible said to be sober, to be godly,
to be righteous?
See, that's where your problems are coming from.
Your problems are coming from sin.
And you know, if your children are out of control,
do you spank your children?
Well, there's your problem right there.
Say, oh, I can't control my children.
They just do whatever they want.
Of course they're going to do whatever they want.
If you don't spank them, the Bible says,
he that spareth his wife, hateth his son,
but he that loveth him, chases them betide.
The Bible says, withhold not correction from the child.
Look, this is Bible pre,
here's a counseling session for you.
Withhold, lie down on the couch.
Tell me about your mother.
Withhold not correction from the child,
for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die.
You say, well, I don't like that counseling.
Well, that's Bible counseling.
Anything other than that is just some made up psycho babble
from some psychologist that's not a god.
The Bible tells us how to rear our children.
The Bible says to teach them and train them
and bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
So if you're not reading the Bible to your child,
like the Bible commanded you to do in Deuteronomy 6,
when it said that every single day,
you're supposed to read the Bible to your child.
It said every day you talk of it.
You talk of God's word.
These words will be in your heart and in your mouth,
and you're going to talk about it to your children,
and you're going to teach your children God's word.
If you're not teaching your children God's word,
and you're not spanking them when they disobey,
then how am I going to help you?
I can't help you.
I have no answers for you.
You're going to have to go some other route
than the biblical route, because that is the biblical route.
But if you read the Bible to your children every day,
and you teach them God's word,
and you set a godly example
of what a Christian is supposed to be like,
and you take the time to teach and to train
and to bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord,
and then when they do mouth off,
and when they do say no,
and when they do throw a fifth
and throw themselves on the ground,
you spank, you beat them with the rod,
as the Bible says,
and you apply the rod of correction to the seed of learning,
then that right there is going to fix the problem.
If it doesn't fix the problem, I don't know what to tell you.
It fixes the problem in my house.
And if it doesn't, I still don't know what to tell you,
because honestly, that's what the Bible says.
You know, I can't give you some magic formula
that's not in the Bible.
What you need to do, you say, well, I didn't know that.
But see, if you come to church, that's where you learn.
You come to church.
You ought to be learning that when you come to church.
You ought to be learning it every day
when you read your Bible.
You ought to be learning it on Sunday morning.
You ought to be learning it on Sunday night.
You ought to be learning it on Wednesday night.
See, it's not efficient for me to talk to each person,
to go to each father, out of all the followers in the room,
to go to each father and say, listen, brother,
let me explain to you how to raise your kids.
Let's spend a couple hours this week.
Let's get together, and let me teach you how to raise your kids.
You can tell me every problem you're having,
every tantrum, every fuss, every disobedience,
and you tell it to me, and I'll help you through this
and explain to you what the answer is.
And then, okay, Monday I'll be with you,
and then Tuesday I'll be...
You know, that's just going to take up my whole week
when I could have just spent one hour
behind the pulpit and just preach it from the pulpit,
and everybody listens and everybody gets it and does it.
And you say, but wait a minute,
what about all the unique situations?
No, there's no temptation taking you
but such as is common demand.
Your temptations and your problems
and your issues are the same
as what everybody else is going through.
And it's the same answer.
The people whose kids are obedient
are obedient for a reason, because they're being spanked.
That's right.
Because they're being taught.
No, my son won't go to church.
Drag him to church.
My daughter refused to come to church.
Pick him up and put him in the car and buckle him in.
You say, well, I'm afraid the police is getting him.
You know what? I don't know what to tell you.
If my child said...
You know, I don't know.
I guess at some point you have to obey God rather than man.
You know, wherever that point comes,
I'm going to raise my children the way that the Bible says,
and at some point what the law says ceases to matter.
It's what God's law says that you're going to have to supersede.
And if my child says, no, I don't want to go to church,
I'm going to say, you know what?
It doesn't matter whether you want to go to church.
As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.
That's what Joshua said.
He said, look, if you guys want to worship other gods, that's fine.
But he said, as for me and my house,
he didn't say just me alone.
He said, me and my house, we will serve the Lord.
I'm not saying I'm just going to serve the Lord.
I'm going to make sure my wife serves the Lord
and she will be forced to serve the Lord.
And my children will be forced to serve the Lord
because it's my house
and me and my house are going to serve the Lord.
That's Bible preaching.
That's Bible doctrine.
And you see, we need to be leaders today as men.
Leaders of tens.
You know, you say, leaders of tens? What's that?
Well, I've already got eight.
You know, two more and I'm a leader of ten.
And the Bible talks about leaders of fifties
and the Bible talks about leaders of the hundreds
and leaders of a thousand.
You know, but we've got a bunch of whips today
that can't even lead two.
They can't even lead four.
They can't even lead five.
The Bible says that men need to lead today.
Men are in charge.
The Bible says that wives would be obedient to their husbands.
The Bible says that children would be obedient to their parents.
The Bible says that when a mother instructs her children,
it's called the law of a mother.
It's not mom's suggestions.
It's mom's laws.
It's dad's laying down the law.
It's not optional.
It's just what has to be.
And you say, well, my home isn't working out right.
Well, you know, are you doing it that way?
And so the bottom line is that people don't really need counseling, do they?
They just need God's word, but then they don't like it
when they're confronted with it many times.
And then they, you know, they fret against the Lord
when they're the ones who are not obeying God's commandments here.
And Moses, he laid it out here.
This is the work you're supposed to do.
This is the law of God.
These are his commandments, okay?
And just do it.
And if you have a question, ask your leader of ten.
Dad.
You know, and if he can't figure it out,
he can ask somebody else locally.
Figure it out.
And, you know, only come to me with the hard stuff.
Because, you know, when you come to me with a question
that says my 12-year-old won't come to church,
you're just wasting my time.
Don't waste my time with that.
Ask any man in this church.
You don't have to come to Moses.
And I'm not saying I'm Moses, like I'm as good as Moses,
but I'm saying I'm the pastor of this church,
kind of like Moses was the pastor of the church in the wilderness.
I'm not comparing myself to him as a person,
but in position, you know, Moses was in that position of leadership.
I'm in a position of leadership.
You know, I can just refer you to anybody to answer that for you.
My 12-year-old is telling me he doesn't want to go to church.
I don't know what to do.
Just go see Brother Segura for that.
You know, go see Brother Miller for that.
You know, go see Brother Andrew.
Any of them can tell you what to do.
I hope you can, right?
What do you do, Brother Segura?
My 12-year-old won't come to church.
What do I do?
I don't know what to do.
Should I put a little carrot in front of his nose
and try to get him to come?
What do I do, Brother Segura?
You put him in the car.
Yeah, and if you're not stronger than your 12-year-old to do that,
then you start lifting weights.
I'm not kidding.
You think I'm kidding right now?
You think I'm going to let my 12-year-old,
I don't have a 12-year-old, but my 10-year-old,
you think my kids are going to spit in my face and tell me how it is
and tell me, I'm not going, I'm not...
Oh, you're going all right.
You will go.
Because I'm the boss.
And you know, we have all this cute preaching today,
and because of cute preaching,
there's a line at the stinking door
of everybody who's got to get counseled
because they don't know how to live their life
because of a bunch of cute preaching
that's not telling people how to really live your life.
That's the problem.
I mean, literally.
You have this little cute preaching
that gives you these little cute little...
Like, I heard that there's a little cute little nugget
that I heard recently.
You want to hear this?
If you have to keep saying over and over
that you're the boss,
then you're a weak leader
and you're not really the boss.
Well, you know who says that they're the boss
more than anybody else in the Bible?
God.
He says, I'm the Lord.
Now do this.
And then the next verse.
I am the Lord.
Keep my commandments.
I'm the Lord.
You know what Lord means?
The boss.
That's what Lord means.
He said the Lord and the servant.
The master and the servant.
The Lord.
He said, I'm the Lord.
I'm the Lord.
I don't have any other gods before me
because I'm in charge.
And this little cute preaching.
Somebody recently told a story.
I heard somebody talking about this.
I guess some guy, his daughter was on Facebook
mouthing off to him on Facebook,
so he took a gun and shot her laptop.
Did anybody see that on the news?
He took a gun and shot the laptop.
Now I didn't see it in the news.
I just heard about it.
I didn't see the video or whatever it was.
But this guy, I guess, shot the laptop
and blew it to pieces.
People are like, oh, that guy's a loser.
That guy is a week later,
and he shouldn't have done that.
You know what I say to that?
It's his house.
I'm not going to judge that guy.
You say, well, you don't know the whole story.
I don't need to know the whole story.
It's his house,
and if he thinks that his teenage daughter
is being an idiot on the computer,
and he wants to pull out his gun
and shoot his own property,
then so what?
I'm not going to sit there,
well, here, he needs to do this,
and look, and people say,
well, he already failed when she was younger.
But hold on.
Better late than never.
Yeah, he probably did fail when he was younger.
I don't know, but I don't know the guy.
I'm not trying to judge the guy.
Maybe he did fail if his daughter
is mouthing off to him on Facebook or whatever
at that age, but you know what?
Does that mean that he should just
let her push him around for the rest of his life?
I don't know.
I guess I messed up when she was two.
Well, yeah, you know what?
You probably did,
but it's time to take the bull by the horns
and start leading now and being charged now.
Because I'll tell you right now,
it's going to be a cold day in hell
before my teenager comes on Facebook
and mouths off to me or mouths off to my face.
It's never going to happen.
It's not going to happen.
Well, I know you're not a teenager.
Well, it might happen once.
It might happen once.
You say, you're abusive.
No, you're an idiot.
And you're not biblical.
I'm not an abusive person.
I'm not talking about injuring anybody,
but I'm talking about taking the belt and spanking.
And I'm talking about punishing.
And honestly, it doesn't take much spanking
to get through to a teenager anyway
because it'll probably humiliate them anyway.
Because you shouldn't have to be spanked
when you're a teenager.
Because if you got spanked enough when you were a kid,
by the time you're a teenager,
you should be able to have somebody
just tell you what's right and talk to you,
and you shouldn't even need to be spanked anymore.
But I'll tell you right now,
if my teenager still needs to be spanked,
I'll spank my 18-year-old.
Amen.
I'm not kidding.
I will spank my children
as long as they're living in my house,
if they're going to mouth off to me
and blaspheme me and say I hate you and mouth.
And my, you know,
I thank God my children aren't like that.
My children love me and we have a happy home.
But you know what?
People today, they are listening to a bunch of garbage
that tells them all this stuff.
It's the world's philosophy.
And that's why you see men
who have no leadership in their home.
And you see children who do not respect their mother
and they do not respect their father.
And they can't handle it.
I mean, I think somebody walked out of my sermon
a little bit earlier,
just as soon as I started talking about this kind of creature.
Well, hit the road.
You know, I mean, I don't know what to tell you.
I don't know what.
There's plenty of churches out there
that won't actually spell this out to you
when the Bible clearly says it.
You know, and what I'm saying is
that the answers are in the Bible.
The answers are simple
and the answers are the same for everybody.
But people don't want to hear the answer.
Now, am I saying
you're not going to have any problems in your life?
No, because even if you follow God's word,
even if you go to church,
you're still going to have problems in your life.
And there are going to be times
when you've got to go to Moses
and say, hey, what do I do?
But it's not every day from morning to night
that you're lined up trying to figure out what to do.
You see the difference?
Okay.
Go if you would in your Bible.
Find my notes here.
Go to 1 Corinthians 7.
Now, a lot of you are in chapter 10, right?
Just go back a few pages to the left.
You see, this whole counseling thing,
this whole counseling phenomenon,
and I don't know if this is, like, getting more popular.
When I was a kid,
I don't remember a lot of counseling going on.
Maybe just the churches I went to,
it just wasn't really happening.
I don't remember my parents ever going in for counseling
as I grew up my whole life.
I don't remember them ever going in
for any kind of counseling at all.
And then I remember later in life,
at one point they did go into counseling
and they got all the wrong answers.
It was everything that was not biblical
that they got at that counseling session.
But you see, a lot of people will say,
well, Pastor Harrison, you don't understand.
Counseling is necessary
because certain people have special situations
and, you know, well, I don't believe that.
No temptation taking you but such is in common domain.
The Bible works for everybody.
Ephesians 5 will work for every marriage, you know,
and all the other scriptures.
Proverbs will work for all child-rearing questions.
Just go to Proverbs.
You don't need anything else.
That's it. Done.
But there's this thing that's out there
that says premarital counseling.
And it's about things that go on in the bedroom.
And here's what they'll say.
Well, you got to have that kind of counseling
because they say, you know,
otherwise people are going to get married,
they're not going to know what to do.
You know what I mean?
Okay.
And look, I'm telling you,
this is the popular thing right now
amongst independent fundamental Baptists.
They're selling all kinds of books and manuals
about the bedroom.
And they have to keep them under lock and key.
Wicked.
Like, literally.
I remember when I was in Bible college,
they had these special book section
that was an over-18 section.
Are you listening to me?
And you had to show them
that you were getting married
within the next three months.
Then they'll let you in
to the books that are under lock and key.
It's like buying porno or something.
And it is porno.
And I remember my wife and I were there,
and she heard them talk about this,
and she said,
I think that these books are about X, Y, and Z.
And I told my wife.
I said, no.
In fact, I even became angry at my wife.
And I said, how dare you?
I literally said to her,
I said, how dare you accuse them of that?
How dare you accuse them of peddling pornography?
I said, I can't believe that you...
I said, you are so out of line right now.
And then it turned out that she was right.
It turned out that it really was porno.
It was books explaining to you,
step-by-step, what to do in the bedroom.
I mean, big, thick books, step-by-step.
One of them was by Tim LaHaye.
Now look, he can't even get the tribulation right.
I know I did sure don't want him
coming into my bedroom and tell me what to do.
He doesn't even know the rapture from the...
He can't even tell the difference
between the tribulation and the wrath of God.
I don't need him explaining to me the bedroom.
But he wrote this book that's a total pornography book.
It's exactly what you read in a teen magazine.
These teen magazines that tell you all about
what goes on in the bedroom
and walk you through it step-by-step.
It's exactly the kind of books they were selling.
Now look, you don't need that kind of teaching.
Let me explain to you why.
Number one, everything that you need
about that subject going into it is found in the Bible.
And last I checked,
the Bible is not in a special over-18 section.
The Bible is not something that I censor from my children.
In fact, we read the Bible to our children cover to cover,
and we don't skip anything.
We never come to something in the Bible,
no matter what age they are.
We don't come to something in the Bible and say,
hey, this is when you're older.
We'll get this to you.
But this is too... you can't handle this.
Does everybody believe that?
I mean, every part of the Bible is okay for all ages.
You know, it's rated for all audiences.
You know, it's the Bible.
It's clean.
The Bible says the word of the Lord is clean.
So I can read anything in the Bible.
Now the Bible does touch upon subjects pertaining to the bedroom,
but it doesn't go into any graphic detail.
Well, that's where we need other books to do that.
That's where we need a manual to do that.
That's where we need a counseling session
where the pastor can sit down and explain with you
the birds and the bees and teach you that.
Now, look, I hope that nobody got in line
and asked that to Moses.
You know, I hope that in that big, long line of people,
especially not in front of Jethro.
You know, maybe that would be better.
You know, some guy walks up in line,
hey, I'm getting married tomorrow.
I don't know what to do.
Okay.
Now, this is what's so stupid about it.
Okay, first of all, the Bible does touch upon
these types of subjects.
Here's just one example in 1 Corinthians 7.
But, you know, there's the whole book of Song of Solomon.
The book of Song of Solomon,
but it doesn't go into any details,
into anything graphic about what exactly goes on.
It just talks in general terms, okay?
And like in 1 Corinthians 7 here, it says in verse 1,
Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me,
it is good for a man not to touch a woman.
Nevertheless, to avoid fornication,
let every man have his own wife
and let every woman have her own husband.
So he says, you know, it's good to just not touch a woman.
You know, if you're married,
don't be going around touching women is what he's saying.
You know, you don't need to touch a woman.
And, you know, we see a lot of people that are married
and they're engaged in a lot of physical activities.
You know, they're not perhaps committing fornication,
but they're just doing everything leading up to it, okay?
And what I like to say is a good rule of thumb
is that any kind of physical contact
that you wouldn't feel comfortable doing with another man,
you shouldn't be doing that with a woman either
if you're not married.
So like, for example, I can walk up to brother Richard
and shake his hand, right?
No problem.
You know, so I can shake his wife's hand, right?
No problem, okay.
But see, am I going to walk up to another man
and start hugging and kissing and stroking him?
No, because that, you know why?
I hate to use, I don't want to use the word
because I don't even like to use the word.
But you probably know the word I'm thinking of,
of what that would be.
It's basically, if you do things that are basically,
I'll just put it this way, pertaining to the bedroom.
Or, you know, what do you say?
What do you say about it?
Well, I don't say anything about it.
It's a Bible.
But honestly, anything that's not just a normal contact
of, hey, high five, you know?
Hey, buddy, how you doing, right?
God bless you.
You're saying, hey, no problem, you know?
But can you see where the line is,
where now you're getting into like a physical relationship?
Look, if it's something that you wouldn't do
with the same gender, it shows that you're doing something
that has to do with reproduction.
You're getting those juices flowing, as it were.
And if you're unmarried, you should not be doing that stuff
because all you're doing is just leading yourself into temptation
and if you're not doing it physically,
you're mentally going there.
And the Bible says that if you lust after a woman
who's married and committed adultery with her already
in your heart, that tells me if you lust after a woman
that's not married, it sounds like you're committing
fornication in your heart.
And when you're sitting there and making out
or whatever you want to call it,
you know, that's where your mind is going,
that's where your body is going,
and that is not right.
And you wouldn't, you could say, no, no, no,
it's just, we're just friends.
Well, you wouldn't do that with another guy.
So it must not just be a just friends thing.
Shaking hands is just friends.
Pat on the back, hey, how you doing?
That's just friends.
You're not going to see men kissing each other on the mouth.
You're not going to see men doing that kind of stuff
because obviously that's what it leads up to.
That's what it is.
That's what it has to do with.
And so the Bible's saying it's good for a man not to touch a woman.
That's the kind of touching he's talking about.
He's not saying, because obviously even Jesus had a woman
wash his feet and he touched, he took people by the hand
and shook their hand.
The Bible refers to Jesus taking women by the hand
or what am I trying to say,
where the woman's washing his feet and so forth.
So it's not like he's just saying no physical contact.
But obviously it's clear what is just a normal physical contact
that has nothing to do with the bedroom, right?
Just shaking hands versus something that goes beyond that
that you're doing for the enjoyment and the lust
of gratifying your flesh with the opposite gender.
Does that help?
I'm trying not to talk in the world's terminology here.
But he says to avoid fornication,
to avoid the temptation of doing these things outside of marriage.
He says let every man have his own wife
and let every woman have her own husband.
So these things should be done within marriage,
not outside of marriage.
And he says, and what things are we talking about?
Things that are gratifying to the flesh.
It can gratify your flesh to shake somebody's hand
or pat them on the back.
But it does gratify the flesh, this making out or whatever.
And look, the Bible is explaining here
that to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife
and let every woman have her own husband.
Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence
and likewise also the wife unto the husband.
The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband.
And likewise also the husband hath not power
of his own body, but the wife.
Defraud he not one the other,
except it be with consent for a time,
that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer
and come together again that Satan tempts you not
for your incontinency.
Now, do you see anything graphic in that passage?
Do you see him explaining anywhere,
okay, this is exactly how it's going to go down.
No, it's completely vague.
He just says, look, you don't have control over your body.
They don't have control over their body.
You know, you don't want to defraud each other.
You want to come together and be together.
You know, and the Bible talks about in other places
just similar wording and similar things,
becoming one flesh.
You know, he doesn't go into great detail.
He just gives you some guidelines.
He says, number one, you know,
this is not something you should be abstaining from in verse 5.
He says, don't defraud one another
except it's with consent for a time.
So he's saying, if you abstain from this activity within marriage,
he says it should only be with consent for a time.
That means that both parties agree and say,
yes, let's abstain for this period of time.
Does everybody understand?
That doesn't mean one person is saying, well, I don't want to.
This is basically both people saying, hey, let's take a break from this
that we might give ourselves unto fasting and prayer.
Then we'll come together again.
So it's mutually agreed upon,
and it's basically for the purpose of prayer, no?
Fasting and prayer.
Not just prayer.
Does everybody understand what I'm saying?
Fasting and prayer.
So, you know, how long do you go without food?
Months?
Nobody here has fasted for months.
Okay, so this isn't something that should be going for months.
You probably never even fasted for a week.
So what I'm trying to teach here is that the Bible does give some guidelines.
It gives some wisdom here.
It gives some teaching and says, hey, look,
it's not right for the wife to say no unto her husband,
and it's not right for the husband to say no to his wife.
Now, most things in the Bible where the Bible teaches about the marriage,
he teaches that the husband is in authority.
But in this particular area, he says it's a two-way street.
He says the husband doesn't say no and the wife doesn't say no.
Don't defraud one another.
You don't have power over your body, whether you're the husband or the wife.
When you got married, you agreed to that.
You know, that's what the contract of marriage involves.
Now, look, nothing graphic.
You say, but let me tell you, I don't want to hear about it.
And you say, well, pastor, I know you can't preach in any more detail than that
because there's children in the room.
Let's go to your office and let me get a better counseling session.
Look, as much detail as I just went into right now
is the most detail I'm ever going to go into with you.
Did you hear me?
What I just explained right now, and I tried to keep it just as G-rated as I could for the children,
you know what, if you come and talk to me personally by ourselves,
it's going to be just as G-rated as it was right now.
I'm not going to go into any more detail than what the Bible goes into.
You say, but how are people going to know what to do?
It's the thing.
Look, people just figure it out. It's called instinct.
Instinct.
Animals figure it out.
Without public school classes starting in the spring to teach them.
Animals just figure it out.
How do they figure it out?
Because God has given them instinct to just know what to do, just to figure it out.
And guess what?
God gave the same thing to human beings.
Just to figure it out, just to know what to do.
And you know, for thousands of years, people have figured it out.
You know, for thousands of years, they knew what to do.
And they didn't have all these classes and school programs and all these.
I mean, look, long before Cosmopolitan magazine, or the Christian version,
which is Tim LaHaye's books and Clint Cavanagh's books, came out,
long before those things came out, people figured out what to do.
You say, yeah, but they're not going to be an expert on it.
Well, here's the thing.
When you just got married yesterday, you don't need to be an expert on it.
You know, you're going to be married for the next 50 years, or whatever.
You're going to be married for the next 20 years, 30 years.
You've got plenty of time to figure it out.
You know, and maybe you're a slow learner.
Well, you've got decades to figure it out.
You know what I mean?
And maybe you're not an expert on it.
Well, you know, give it a few years.
You know what I mean?
I'd rather give it a few years.
It's not going to take a few minutes, but, you know,
let's say it's going to take a few years, or whatever.
You know, I'd rather do that than to buy porno and read it.
Amen.
And read smut.
Because the Bible says marriage is honorable at all,
and the bed undefiled, but a hormones and adulterous God will judge.
The Bible says that the marriage bed is undefiled.
Now, look, you don't bring other people into your bed.
Okay?
So why do we mentally need to go into your bed?
You know, it needs to be kept within the bedroom,
behind closed doors.
It's not something that should be discussed publicly.
And I will never discuss what goes on in my bedroom publicly,
and you ought not discuss what goes on in your bedroom publicly.
And if somebody writes a book about what goes on in their bedroom
and sells it in a Baptist church, they are a pervert.
Amen.
They're a pervert.
I walked up to one of these perverts
and said, this book's pornography.
And here's what he said.
He said, no.
He said, it's not pornography.
I said, why not?
To tell me why this is not pornography,
if it's describing in vivid detail
what goes on in the bedroom,
explain to me why this book is not pornography.
You know what this pervert told me?
He said, well, because he said pornography
is when you're reading about what other people do.
In this book, it's about what you and your wife do.
And I said to him, do you have a hidden camera
in my bedroom to know what me and my wife do,
that you wrote a whole book about what me and my wife do?
I said, no.
This is about what you and your wife do
or about what somebody else does.
But it sure ain't about what I do
because you've never been to my bedroom
and you never will, you stinking pervert.
And I'm telling you today
that we've got a bunch of Christians today
that want to indulge their flesh in worldliness.
Look, that is what sells
because it's what sells with the magazine, right?
Why is it that every time you go to the grocery store
we can literally go down there right now
and go to the magazine market
and there will be magazines
and on the front cover it'll tell you
this is what you do in the bedroom.
This is how you're going to do it.
X, Y, Z.
Step one, step two, step three.
Forty things you're going to do.
And that's what it is every week.
You know why?
Because it sells every week.
It sells every month.
And so these perverts, for filthy lucre's sake,
to make money,
are selling the same kind of trash to God's people.
And we need some jackro to come in and say,
listen buddy,
what you're doing is not good.
Give them the Bible and tell them
to shut up and do what it says.
You don't have to sit there
and give them step by step
what to do in their own bedroom.
Are they stupid or something?
I mean, I like what my pastor used to say in California.
He said, well, I grew up on a farm.
I knew what to do.
You know what I mean?
It's not that complicated, folks.
But if you've got people that are so stupid
that they can't figure it out,
you know, what are you teaching them?
And you say, wow, that's right,
we've got to teach them exactly what to do.
No.
You shouldn't have to teach people
everything exactly what to do.
You teach them the principles of God's Word.
And then they say,
well, but you don't understand.
These young people are growing up,
and they get married,
and they think it's bad,
and they're afraid to do it
because they think it's bad.
Well, that's just you failed to teach the Bible.
Even when I just read to you, correct that?
And there's plenty.
I mean, read the book of Solomon.
Read the book of Proverbs.
Read what I just read to you.
Read other portions of the Scripture,
and you'll figure out it's not bad.
It's undefined.
The marriage bed is undefined.
So if they're afraid of it,
that just shows some warped thing.
They probably have been exposed to weird stuff
that made them afraid.
And, you know, if I read that book by Tim,
like, hey, I've gotten you afraid too.
Bunch of nonsense.
And so we can understand that, you know,
the Bible has all the answers that we need.
Amen.
You know, and look,
if we need to know other stuff
about our bedroom that's not in the Bible,
like, you need to just figure it out, buddy,
because I'm not going there with you
to walk you through it,
either in spirit or in the flesh.
I'm not going there in book form.
I'm not going there through my preaching.
I refuse to go...
I mean, this tonight is the most detail
you will ever hear me going to,
just what came straight from the Bible.
And it's like that in every area of life,
whether it's your child rearing,
whether it's your marriage,
whether it's your job,
whether it's your business,
whether it's, you know,
how to get over sick,
all the answers in the Bible.
And if you come to church,
look, maybe this sermon
didn't have all the answers for you tonight.
But if I didn't cover it tonight,
I'll probably cover it Wednesday night
or on Sunday morning.
Come here for a year
and listen to 156 sermons.
You're going to know how to live your life
from the Bible.
Tonight I touched on a couple areas.
I can't do it all in one sermon.
But other sermons will teach you
others in situations.
Other sermons will guide you
in other areas of life.
Whatever I miss,
you'll fill in the gaps
in your personal Bible reading.
We don't need a big, long counseling line
to talk to Moses.
We just need God's Word
to be taught unto us
on a weekly basis.
And we can go to other people.
We can go to anybody
and get the same answer.
The ruler of 10
is going to give you the same answer
as Moses would have told you.
That was the whole point,
where I generally said,
why are they coming to you
to ask stuff that they could ask anybody,
that they could ask anybody
who's been saved for six months
to tell them that?
And they're wasting your time with that?
And you have to sit there
and explain to them these basic things
when they could just get that from anybody?
You know, it's a waste of your time.
It's a waste of their time.
And so, honestly,
the point of the sermon tonight is this.
Being a leader,
being a leader is giving people the tools
to make decisions and do things on their own,
not to be holding their hand.
You know, if you're at your job,
you've got to train people
to be able to think
and do their job on their own.
You can't always supervise them
every step of the way.
You know, at one point,
you've got to cut the umbilical cord,
say you're on your own.
And, you know,
it's the same thing with children.
When you're raising children,
some of those children
are going to be on their own.
Some of those children
are going to turn 18 years old,
and the world has told them,
even though we don't agree with it, you know,
the world has told them,
hey, when you're 18,
you can do whatever you want,
and you can leave your parents
and go live on your own
and do whatever you want.
Now, I think that's true
if you get married.
But I don't think 18-year-olds
should just go out
and just do whatever they want.
But the world will tell you
you can just go out
and do whatever you want.
You're 18 now.
And you know what?
If you have not taught your kids
what to think for themselves,
and you haven't taught your children
the Word of God
and how to make their own decisions,
well, when they turn 18,
you know what they're going to do?
Oh, great.
Now mom's not standing over me
cracking the whip every second.
I'm going to do what I want to do now.
And so that's why
this style of leadership doesn't work,
where you're making everybody's decisions for them,
where you're a pastor,
where everybody,
before they blow their nose,
is going to come get counseling from you.
Should I use Kleenex with or without lotion built in?
You know, what do I do?
I don't know what to do.
You've got to teach your people,
as a pastor,
you've got to teach your people
to where they don't need
to ask you questions all the time
because they already learned it
from the Bible and on their own.
And as a parent,
you've got to teach your children.
You know, it might be frustrating
to teach them how to clean their room.
It'd be easier just to clean it yourself,
but you've got to teach them
how to clean it anyway
because they need to learn
how to clean it
because someday they're going
to have their own house
and their own apartment
and they're going to have
to clean that thing themselves
and somebody's not going
to do it for them.
And someday they're going
to go to a job
and they need to learn
how to obey
and they need to learn
how to do what they're told
and they need to learn
to follow instructions.
You know, I gave my child
an instruction
and they failed to do it properly.
The temptation is just
to go in and do it for them.
But instead I say,
no, do it again.
No, do it a third time.
No, do it a fourth time.
Learn how to do it.
Grow.
Get better at it.
Figure it out.
Do things on your own.
Practice, okay?
It's the same thing
with the church.
You know, go out soul winning.
You know, you're not going
to do everything perfect,
but go out and make
the mistakes.
Do it, you know?
Not just, oh, let me
get every door.
I'm going to have
20 silent partners
following me around
but watch me do it.
You know, no,
everybody needs
to learn how to do it.
Is everybody going
to be perfect at it?
No, maybe we're going
to make mistakes
and, you know,
maybe, you know,
at least they're doing it.
At least they're working
out how to do it.
And you know what?
If I were to fall
over dead right now,
people in this church
would know how
to live their life.
I wouldn't be like,
oh man, what do we do?
Pastor Anderson's
not here anymore.
I don't even know
what to do.
What do I do?
I mean, what now?
They would just,
I mean, they'd feel sad,
I hope, but I mean,
they're not just going
to sit there
and just not know
what to do.
You know what they do?
They'll still be soul winning.
They'll still know
what the right doctrine is.
They'll still be writing
their Bibles.
Somebody else will get up here
and fill my place
and preach and do whatever
because it's not like
I am just the only one
who has the answers
or whatever because
I've taught everything
that I know
and I continue to learn more
and I continue to teach more.
But I'm trying to help you
to be able to lead
your own family
so that your wife
doesn't have to come to me.
I don't want your wife
coming to me
and asking me stuff
about the Bible.
I want your wife
coming to you asking you
stuff about the Bible.
And I want you to have
the right answer
to give your wife.
And not to say,
well, I don't know.
I want you to be able
to leave your own house
and your own family.
And I want you
to teach your wife.
And to the ladies,
I would say,
teach your children.
Train your children.
Someday you're going to have
to cut that apron string
and you're not going to
be there all the time
to do everything for them.
You've got to give people
a chance to make mistakes
and to do things on their own
and to learn how
to make their own decisions
so that someday
they can do it on their own.
And they can at least
have the critical thinking
that when they get, you know,
at least they learn enough
how to be independent enough
that when they get married,
they can just go to the bedroom
and say,
I'm going to figure this out
on my own.
Not have to bring
Tim LaHaye in there
and not have to bring books in
and not have to bring
a bunch of charts and mains.
They can just figure it out.
Because they're not a fool.
And if you teach people
how to think,
then they can think
on their own.
If you teach people
godly principles,
they can apply these principles
to every area of life
and they will work
for everybody every time.
And honestly,
when people come to me
and ask me for advice,
it's either one of two things.
It's either something totally stupid
that they should already
know the answer to anyway.
Just a total no-brainer
of just spank your child.
Any questions?
Put them in the car
and buckle the seatbelt
and drive down here.
Or else,
it's either something
really stupid like that,
or it's usually something
that they already
know the answer for.
They're just kind of
testing whether I agree
with what they're
already going to say anyway.
Hey, that's fine.
But you know what?
You usually have
the right answer
on your own anyway.
You don't need
a bunch of counseling.
And if there is something
that's really a hard thing,
and sometimes they do
come up,
things that are hard,
things that are complicated.
And you might come
to me with that.
But it's not a daily thing.
And if you're having
to come to me
every single day
because you don't know
how to live,
and this happened
at school.
I don't know what to do.
Get out of school.
This happened in my family.
My wife did this.
What do I do?
My husband did this.
What do I do?
It's like,
are you listening to anything
that I'm even preaching?
If I explain it to you,
are you even going to listen
since you didn't hear it
all the times
that I preached about it
and explain it?
It's just that simple.
I really like
Jeff Rowe in the Bible.
I think he's a cool guy.
It seems bad that probably
nobody's going to name
their kid Jethro
because that TV show
just ruined it.
You know, some hillbilly
named Jethro.
So it just ruined the name.
But honestly,
Jethro was a cool guy
because he only shows up
a couple of times
in the Bible.
He shows up in Exodus 18
and he has a lot
of really good wisdom here
teaching Moses how to lead.
And we should take
that advice how to lead.
He shows up later
and he's got more advice.
He knew he was
just a very wise man.
And Moses in Numbers 10
is begging him to stay around
in Numbers 10.
He begs Jethro and says,
Look, you've got to stay with us.
We need your help.
We need your wisdom.
We need your guidance.
We need your counsel.
You are a wise man.
He's a very smart man.
And this is the chapter
that really has
his greatest pearl of wisdom.
And if you're smart,
you'll apply it to your life
and say, you know what?
If I'm going to be
the leader that I ought to be,
I need to teach people
to do things on their own
and not micromanage everybody.
And you'll notice that
as a pastor, I'm a hands-off
kind of a pastor.
I don't micromanage.
You know, we have
a preaching class coming up
in a few weeks.
I'm not going to be here.
I'll tell you right now.
I already know for a fact
I'm not going to be here
because I have to be
somewhere else.
So Brother Dave
is handling it, okay?
But see, I'm trying
to teach Brother Dave,
and I'm trying to teach
other people to know
how to do things
on their own sometimes.
And there are soul-winning
times and soul-winning
programs that don't
involve me at all
in this church.
You won't see me showing up
at the Mesa Soul-Winning time.
I don't want to talk
to all those Mormons.
But even if I did,
I like that.
I like it when people
can do things on their own
without me just having
to always be the one
doing everything.
I want people to do
things on their own.
I want my children
to start learning
to do things on their own
and to not try
to do everything myself.
Because there's only
so much one person can do.
And honestly,
sometimes I get stressed out,
and sometimes I get
angry and frustrated.
And you know what?
The problem usually is
whenever I'm really
angry and frustrated
and tearing out my hair,
it's usually because I'm
trying to take on
too much at one time,
just like Moses did.
And sometimes I just
have to step back
and say, you know what?
I don't have to do
all this myself.
I need to delegate
some of this.
I'm taking too much on me.
I need to have
other people do this.
And the wonderful thing is
when you start having
other people do stuff for you,
then they're learning
and you're training others
and you're teaching others
to think for themselves
and do things on their own
and to know what to do.
Let's prioritize that
in a word of prayer.
Father, thank you so much
for this man,
the Bible, Jethro,
and his words of wisdom.
Help us to raise
children, dear God.
Give me wisdom
as I raise my children
that they might grow up
and serve you
with their lives
and that they might know
how to make
their own decisions
and not be just so inept
that they can't even
run their own house
or do their own job
or have a marriage
or have children
without me just standing there
leading every step
of the way, dear God.
And help the people
of our church, dear God,
to grow up
and to learn how to think
on their own
and study the Bible
on their own
to where they can
get some of the answers
for themselves
and not have to just
always rely on someone else
just holding their hand.
Help us to just realize
that leadership
is equipping people
to do things on their own,
not just doing everything for them.
And in Jesus' name we pray.