through the Word of God this morning and help us to learn what you'd have us to learn.
And it's such an important subject, dear God, I pray that no one would take the message lightly,
and in Jesus' name I pray, amen.
Now here we are in Romans chapter 16, and before I get into the message,
I'll show you just a few things about this chapter.
Now, this chapter is the end of the book of Romans.
Paul is going through a rundown. You probably notice he's going through lists of his friends, basically.
People that have helped him, and people that have been dear to him over the years,
and he's listing them off, and these are his friends that are in Rome
that he wants to pass on some kind of a special greeting to, and he gives some things about them.
And you notice the first people that he talks about, Phoebe in verse number 1.
It says in verse number 2 that she had been a suckerer of many.
I mean, she helped people. That's what suckerer there means.
And he says, do whatever she needs, take care of her.
And then he says, greet Priscilla and Aquila, my helpers in Christ Jesus,
who have for my life laid down their own necks, unto whom not only I give thanks,
but also all the churches of the Gentiles.
Likewise, greet the church that is in their house.
See, they actually had church meeting in their house, the Bible reads there.
And then you'll see different things listed on here, just all the different people here,
and I wanted to point out something before I move on into the message,
that the Bible says in verse number 7, the Bible says,
Salute Andronikos and Junia, my kinsmen and my fellow prisoners,
who are of note among the apostles who also were in Christ before me.
So these are people that have suffered with them.
They've been in prison with them.
They've helped them. They've worked with them through the years,
and so he's giving them a little bit of credit for what they've done.
I want to preach to you this morning a sermon on friendship, being a good friend,
what it means to be a real friend to somebody.
Now, I have several different examples here of friends in the Bible,
and I want to show you why they were such a good friend,
and then I have some examples of some bad friends in the Bible.
Now, before I get into it, let me read you a few scriptures,
because I want to show you God's definition of a friend versus the world's definition of a friend.
The Bible reads in Proverbs 18, 24,
A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly,
and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.
The Bible reads in John 15, 13,
Greater love hath no man than this,
than a man lay down his life for his friends.
Proverbs 17, 17 reads,
A friend loveth at all times,
and a brother is born for adversity.
And in Proverbs 27, 10, the Bible reads,
Thine own friend and thy father's friend forsake not.
Neither go into thy brother's house in the day of calamity,
for better is a neighbor that is near than a brother far off.
You see, when the Bible talks about being a friend,
and when the Bible talks about friends,
you know, it talks about sticking with somebody.
He says, there's a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.
He says, did you know that you can have friends that are so close to you,
and they're such good friends that when even your brother would forsake you,
when everybody would turn their back on you,
your friend would stick with you closer than a brother.
The Bible says that no man has a greater love
than if he'd lay down his life for his friends.
You see, the sacrificial nature of what it is to be a friend,
the Bible says a friend loveth at all times.
I mean, at the times when it's not maybe popular to be friends with you,
or maybe at times when you're not very friendly,
or when you're not very lovable,
the Bible says a friend will love you at all times.
And a brother is born for adversity.
Adversity means when things are going wrong,
when things are going against you.
And then the Bible says,
Thine own friend and thy father's friend forsake not.
Don't forsake your friends. Stay with them.
Be loyal to your friends is what God's saying.
Now, here's the world's definition of friendship.
I found it in Judges 14, verse 20.
The Bible says,
But Samson's wife was given to his companion,
different word there, not friend,
to his companion whom he had used as his friend.
You hear that?
It says that he used this guy as his friend.
Isn't that what the world's kind of friendship is?
It's who can I use?
That's what friendship to the world is.
You know, I was thinking about the story of the prodigal son,
how everybody was his friend when he had all the money.
Remember, he was Mr. Cool?
He was throwing all the parties.
Everybody was his friend.
But as soon as he faced a little bit of adversity,
as soon as he was in some rough times,
all of a sudden, all his friends are gone
because they weren't real friends, were they?
You know, we think about for a minute what it is to be a friend.
And when you think of your friends,
let's say you're looking for friends.
What do you look for?
Well, you look for somebody
that has the same interests as you, right?
Oh, this person's like me.
They have the same interests as me.
I think I'll be their friend.
Or, well, this person has a lot of money.
It would be advantageous to me to be their friend.
Or this person is a little higher than me
on the totem pole at work.
So maybe I'll be their friend.
Maybe I can get something out of them.
Maybe I can use them as my friend.
But that's not what the Bible talks about
when it talks about friends.
The first example that I want to give you in the Bible
of a good friend is one of the people mentioned here
in Romans 16, verses 3 and 4, Priscilla and Aquila.
These are Paul's friends.
So my first two examples of a good friend in the Bible
are Priscilla and Aquila.
The Bible says that they were his helpers in Christ Jesus,
and it says that for his life they laid down their own necks.
Well, isn't that a great friend to have?
Flip back to the book of Acts,
one book previous in the Bible, in chapter 18,
and I'm going to show you a little bit
about Priscilla and Aquila and how they met Paul.
You know, we live in a day where,
you know how people find their friends,
and this is so indicative
of what I'm talking about this morning?
What do they do?
They get on the Internet, right?
They get on some chat room.
They get on some dating service.
Everybody I know anymore, and even independent Baptists,
I mean, even Christians, everybody I know anymore.
Oh, where did you meet your wife?
Where did you meet your husband?
Where did you meet your girlfriend or boyfriend?
Oh, on the Internet.
Have you noticed that?
Everywhere you go, everybody I talk to, at least,
is meeting their spouse on the Internet.
Why?
Because you can go on the Internet,
and you can type in,
this is exactly what I want them to be like, you know?
I want them to be just like me.
I want them to like what I like,
to be like I am, to do what I do,
and it's kind of a, to me it's kind of,
it's a little bit sick.
It's a little weird, okay,
to just search on the Internet
to find somebody that you like,
and maybe that's not popular to say that,
but I just think that God brings you into contact
with the people that you should be meeting,
and that surfing the Internet and searching for people
that are just like you based on what they can do for you
is not the right way to find friends,
but look at Acts chapter 18, verse 1.
The Bible says,
After these things, Paul departed from Athens
and came to Corinth,
and found a certain Jew named Aquila,
born in Pontus, lately come from Italy.
Remember, Paul's writing to him in the book of Romans
when he's back in Italy.
Here he just came from Italy,
and he's sojourning in Corinth,
and the Bible says,
Lately come from Italy, and with his wife Priscilla,
because that Claudius had commanded all Jews
to depart from Rome, and came unto them.
And because he was of the same craft,
he abode with them and wrought,
for by their occupation they were tentmakers.
So here's a Jew, he's in Rome,
but Claudius the emperor is persecuting the Jews,
and he says, I'm going to kick out every Jew from Rome.
So this guy's kicked out, he's down on his luck,
he's in a foreign place,
and Paul runs across him,
and they both did the same thing for a living,
because Paul was not a preacher just full-time.
He was actually a tentmaker on the side.
He made tents, and he preached the gospel.
Those were his two things.
He always paid his own way, is what the Bible teaches.
You can find that in the book of 1 Thessalonians.
And so here he is, he runs into these people,
Aquila and Priscilla, and they have a common interest.
There's nothing wrong with making a friend,
because you have a common interest,
a common job, that's fine.
And so he runs across this guy,
and he says, hey, let's work together,
let's be friends.
And in the process, I'm sure he won him to Christ
and got him saved,
because you'll read down a little bit further in the story,
and look down, if you would, at verse number 24.
And a little later on in the story,
you'll see Priscilla and Aquila mention again,
the Bible reads,
And a certain Jew named Apollos,
born in Alexandria, this guy's from Egypt,
an eloquent man,
that means he's a very great public speaker,
and mighty in the Scriptures came to Ephesus.
This man was instructed in the way of the Lord,
and being fervent in the Spirit,
he spake and taught diligently the things of the Lord,
knowing only the baptism of John.
And he began to speak boldly in the synagogue,
whom when Aquila and Priscilla had heard,
they took him unto them,
and expounded unto him the way of God more perfectly.
And when he was disposed to pass into Achaea,
the brethren wrote, exhorting the disciples to receive him,
who when he was come, helped them much,
which had believed through grace.
For he mightily convinced the Jews, and that publicly,
showing by the Scriptures that Jesus was Christ.
So here, Paul takes Priscilla and Aquila under his wing,
he teaches them the Bible, he gets them saved,
he teaches them the things of God.
They turn around, they all travel to Ephesus together,
Paul, Priscilla, and Aquila.
They get there and they run into this man Apollos,
he's from Egypt,
but he's a very powerful speaker,
and they hear him getting up and preaching the Bible,
but he didn't know about Jesus Christ.
I mean, he was just preaching the Old Testament,
this hadn't been that long since Jesus Christ
had been crucified and risen from the dead.
And so Apollos is standing up and preaching in the synagogue,
and boy, this guy's a great preacher,
he's a great public speaker,
he knows the Bible like the back of his hand,
and so what did Priscilla and Aquila do?
Now they return the favor that Paul did for them,
they take him aside and they expound to him
the way of God more perfectly,
then he becomes a great preacher of the gospel of Jesus Christ,
publicly proclaiming and proving to people from the Bible
that Jesus, in fact, was the Christ.
See, the Bible says in Proverbs 27, 17,
iron sharpeneth iron,
so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend.
See, the kind of friends that you have
are the kind of friends that are gonna push you
and motivate you to greater service for God.
See, God says, if you're iron,
then get around somebody who's iron,
and boy, iron sharpens iron,
and you're both gonna be sharpened,
you're both gonna grow from it,
you're both gonna be improved.
Hey, are the friends that you have,
are they like you in that they love God
and wanna serve God and are going the same direction
that you're going for the things of God?
Now, I'm not saying that your friends have to be perfect.
Good night. I'm not perfect.
You're not perfect.
So your friends aren't gonna be perfect,
but I'm gonna tell you something.
You oughta have the kind of friends
that are gonna sharpen you.
Ask yourself this question about your friends.
Are they sharpening you,
or are they making you a little bit dull?
Are they tearing you down?
But not only that, but are you sharpening them?
See, it's more important to be a friend
than to have a friend.
Okay, we think about who we have as a friend.
No, why don't you just pick somebody
and be a friend to that person,
because the first scripture we read said,
a man that hath friends must show himself friendly.
Now, when the Bible says show himself friendly,
it doesn't mean you walk up to people,
hey, how you doing, buddy?
Hey, I'm a friendly kind of guy.
That's why I got all these friends, okay?
That's not what he's talking about.
That's what most people think.
You gotta be friendly, you know?
Hey, how you doing?
Hey, God bless you.
He's talking about being a friend.
When he says being friendly,
he says you need to be a friend
to the people who need a friend.
Look at these friends that Paul picked up.
He picked up a couple of people
who were displaced from their hometown.
They didn't have a lot of money.
They couldn't do anything for him.
They didn't even know the Bible.
Hey, they didn't have anything to offer Paul.
Paul said, let me be your friend.
He said, I'll teach you the Bible.
I'll get you saved.
And he said, you know what?
I'll work with you.
I'll help you get your business started here in Corinth.
I'll help you make these tents.
Hey, let's work together.
I'm gonna be your friend.
And those two friends that Paul made,
Priscilla and Aquila,
they ended up being people that later on
laid down their own necks for Paul.
See what I mean?
He was friendly to them,
and in the process he gained two great lifelong friends
that you'll read about throughout the New Testament
as being friends to Paul all through the years.
They always stood by him and stayed with him.
And then not only that,
because Paul had showed them the love of God
and taught them how to be a friend,
they turned around and became a friend to Apollos,
another man who was kind of like they were,
you know, out of his hometown.
He'd been persecuted out of his town.
And they took him aside.
What'd they do?
They taught him the Bible
like Paul taught them the Bible.
What did they do?
They befriended him.
They helped him.
They strengthened him.
And that's the kind of friends that you should have,
the kind of friends that you're strengthening
and the kind of friends that are strengthening you.
See, iron sharpened with iron.
It's a two-way street.
That's what real friendship should be.
So number one, you want to have the kind of friends
that are gonna help you spiritually
and that you are helping spiritually both.
That's the best kind of friend that you could have.
You don't have to turn there,
but Mark chapter 5, 19, the Bible reads,
Howbeit Jesus suffered him not,
but saith unto him, this is Jesus speaking,
Go home to thy friends.
This is after he just won somebody to Christ.
Go home to thy friends and tell them
how great things the Lord had done for thee
and hath had compassion on thee.
Hey, tell your friends about Jesus Christ.
You say, Pastor Aniston, I have all these unsaved friends
that I had from before I was saved
or before I was living for God.
What do I do, Pastor Aniston?
Should I tell them all to just hit the road
because they're not the right kind of friends?
Hey, no, do like Jesus said to do.
He says, no, go tell all your friends
the great things that God's done for you.
And I'm gonna tell you something.
When you start telling all your friends
the great things that God's done for you
and you start telling your friends about how to be saved
and telling them about how much you love the Bible
and telling them about church
and telling them what great things that God's done for you,
either one of two things.
They're either gonna get saved
and get right with God and start living for God,
or they're probably gonna stop being your friend on their own.
You don't have to stop being their friend.
I've never had to stop being anybody's friend.
Okay, they stop being my friend, okay?
Because they don't like to hear about the gospel,
the kingdom, the Bible, soul-winning,
righteousness, holiness, godliness.
Hey, they get sick of it, and they leave on their own.
And so God says, here's what you do when you get saved.
Here's what you do when you start living for God.
Just start telling them all about it.
Tell all your friends about it.
And, boy, if you have ten friends
and one of them gets saved and starts living for God,
wouldn't that be great?
And then the other nine might hit the road.
And that's a sad thing.
Hopefully, all ten of them stick around,
but that's the way life is, isn't it?
And the other ten probably weren't really your friends anyway,
because the world doesn't really even know
what it means to be a friend.
And so, number one, you want to pick the kind of friends
that are building you up spiritually
and that you're building up spiritually, both.
But secondly, I want to show you another example
of some great friends in the Bible,
Jonathan and David from the Old Testament.
Look at 1 Samuel 18.
We were in Acts 18.
Now, we're in the Old Testament.
Now we're going back to 1 Samuel 18.
We saw Priscilla and Aquila, great, great friends to Paul,
great friends to Apollos,
great friends of the Gospel
who were willing to put down their necks on the line.
And keep in mind, when Paul's writing that,
he's under the inspiration of the Holy Ghost.
I mean, that's the Holy Bible saying that they really were
willing to put their neck on the line.
For the Apostle Paul, is there anybody in this world
that you'd be willing to put your neck on the line for?
Because that's what friendship is.
Great a love hath no man than this,
and then a man laid down his life for his friends.
But look at 1 Samuel 18.
We'll see this story about Jonathan.
First of all, understand that in chapters 13 and 14 and 15,
we're introduced to Jonathan, Saul's son.
And I've preached on this before,
but you remember the great deliverance
that he wrought for the children of Israel
against the Philistines.
He went up with just his armor bearer and said,
hey, the Lord is not limited whether he stays by many or by few.
And remember, he took his armor bearer up
and just single-handedly routed the Philistines,
and then that emboldened the entire army of the Israelites,
and they chased after them, and they fled away.
Well, you remember in 1 Samuel 17, just a few chapters later,
another man does almost the same thing, David.
David, a young man, probably 17, 18 years old,
goes out there and the same thing.
He says, hey, one man, I can fight.
He says, the battle's the Lord's.
Same attitude as Jonathan had back in 1 Samuel 13 and 14
is the same attitude David had in 1 Samuel 17
when he faced his Goliath.
Well, Jonathan sees that, and he just really is impressed by that,
and he loves David, and so look at verse 1.
The Bible reads,
And it came to pass, when he had made an end of speaking unto Saul,
when David had made an end of speaking unto Saul,
that the soul of Jonathan was knit with the soul of David,
and Jonathan loved him as his own soul.
See, that's the real friendship that we see here,
and the Bible says,
And Saul took him that day,
and would let him go no more home to his father's house.
Then Jonathan and David made a covenant,
because he loved him as his own soul,
and Jonathan stripped himself of the robe that was upon him
and gave it to David and his garments,
even to his sword and to his bow and to his girdle,
and David went out whithersoever Saul sent him
and behaved himself wisely,
and Saul set him over the men of war,
and he was accepted in the sight of all the people
and also in the sight of Saul's servants.
So here, Jonathan decides to extend the hand of friendship to David.
You see that?
Who was the one who first set up?
He went to him and just said,
You know what? I'm going to be your friend,
and let me show you how I'm going to be your friend.
Here, why don't you take my jacket?
Why don't you take this nice kingly apparel
that my dad gave me, who's the king of Israel?
Why don't you take this beautiful sword,
and this will be your sword?
Hey, why don't you take my things
and why don't we make a covenant together?
And what he means by covenant is like a promise,
where he says, I am going to be your friend.
I'm going to do good to you.
I'm going to stick out for you.
I'm going to be loyal to you.
I'm going to stand up for you, and you do the same for me.
Would you be my friend?
And David says, Yes, I'll be your friend.
You're giving me a lot of nice stuff.
No, I'm just kidding.
Just kidding.
But he says, Yes, of course I'll be your friend.
And boy, the two had so much in common.
Again, just like Paul and Priscilla Nicole,
they did have something in common,
but they didn't search on the Internet.
You know, I'm looking for a tent maker.
Let me search under independent Baptist tent makers.
Hey, all right, I found one.
He lives in Tempe, Arizona.
We're going to get a long grave.
You know, that's not what it was at all.
See, God brought them across the way of these people.
God ordained these meetings.
And so here he is.
Jonathan extends the hand of friendship to David.
He showed himself friendly,
and he gained a great friend in David,
as we'll see later in the story.
Flip over to the next chapter, 1 Samuel 19, 1.
The Bible reads,
And Saul spake to Jonathan his son,
and to all his servants, that they should kill David.
This is where Saul decides he's going to kill David
because he's jealous of him.
He was getting more accolades than Saul was
because he was the winning general and so forth.
And in verse 2, the Bible says,
But Jonathan, Saul's son, delighted much in David.
And Jonathan told David, saying,
Saul, my father, seeketh to kill thee.
Now therefore, I pray thee,
take heed to thyself until the morning,
and abide in a secret place and hide thyself.
And I will go out and stand beside my father
in the field where thou art,
and I will commune with my father of thee,
and what I see, that I will tell thee.
And Jonathan spake good of David unto Saul his father,
and said unto him,
Let not the king sin against his servant against David,
because he hath not sinned against thee,
and because his works have been to thee were very good.
For he did put his life in his hand and slew the Philistine,
and the Lord wrought a great salvation for all Israel.
Thou Saul's sin did rejoice.
Wherefore, then, wilt thou sin against innocent blood,
to slay David without a cause?
And Saul hearkened unto the voice of Jonathan,
and Saul sware as the Lord liveth,
He shall not be slain.
And Jonathan called David,
and Jonathan showed him all those things,
and Jonathan brought David to Saul,
and he was in his presence as enticed.
So here, Saul, his father, has turned against David,
but the bond of friendship is still there,
and so Jonathan says,
I'm going to hide you, I'm going to warn you,
I'm going to save your life, get out of here, go hide,
and I'm going to talk to Saul and try to calm him down
and let him know that he shouldn't be after you
and that you're a good guy and that you're not a traitor at all.
And so he does that, and there David is back in his presence.
But look at 1 Samuel 20, verse 1.
Later on in chapter 19, of course,
Saul's trying to kill David again.
And so we see in verse number 1 of 1 Samuel 20,
And David fled from Nihoth and Ramah,
and came and said before Jonathan,
What have I done, and what is my iniquity,
and what is my sin before thy father that he seeketh my life?
And he said unto him, God forbid, thou shalt not die.
Behold, my father will do nothing, either great or small,
but that he will show it me,
and why should my father hide this thing from me?
Is it not so?
See, Jonathan and Saul were very close.
You have to understand this about the story.
Saul and Jonathan were very close, father and son,
and that's why, and so even just the fact
that he stood up for David, his friend,
even when his father was against him,
that shows the friendship that he had for David.
But he says, look, if Saul was going to kill you,
he would have told me about it.
I mean, he tells me everything is what he's saying.
But it says in verse number 3,
And David sware moreover and said,
Thy father certainly knoweth
that I have found grace in thine eyes,
and he saith, Let not Jonathan know this, lest he be grieved.
So he says, he's not telling you,
because he knows that you don't stand for it.
And he saith, Let not Jonathan know this, lest he be grieved.
But truly, as the Lord liveth and as thy soul liveth,
there is but a step between me and death.
Then said Jonathan unto David,
Whatsoever thy soul desireth, I will even do it for thee.
Boy, you see the love and the friendship that he has.
He said, I'll do anything for you.
I'll stick out my neck for you.
And in verse number 14, we'll go down a little bit later
in the story, we'll see what Jonathan says here.
Actually, you know what?
Let me turn to the right place here,
because I think I'm looking at the wrong verse.
1 Samuel 20 and verse number 11, the Bible says,
And Jonathan said unto David,
Come and let us go out into the field.
And they went out, both of them, into the field.
And Jonathan said unto David, O Lord God of Israel,
When I have sounded my father about tomorrow,
any time, or the third day, and behold,
if there be good toward David,
and I said not unto thee, and showeth thee,
the Lord do so, and much more to Jonathan.
But if it please my father to do thee evil,
then I will show it thee, and send thee away,
that thou mayest go in peace,
and the Lord be with thee, as he had been with my father.
And thou shalt not only wall,
yet I live, show me the kindness of the Lord,
that I die not.
But also thou shalt not cut off thy kindness
from my house forever.
They're entering into another covenant here.
Know not when the Lord hath cut off the enemies of David,
everyone from the face of the earth.
So Jonathan made a covenant with the house of David, saying,
Let the Lord even require it at the hand of David's enemies.
And Jonathan caused David to swear again,
because he loved him,
for he loved him as he loved his own soul.
Then Jonathan said to David, and then on and on,
they made a deal that if Saul was going to kill David,
then he would shoot the arrows and hit the target,
but if not, then he'd shoot them beyond the target.
I don't have time to go into that whole story,
but look down, if you would, at verse number 41.
Jonathan does, in fact, find out that Saul does want to kill David.
And so the Bible reads in verse 41,
And as soon as the lad was gone,
David arose out of a place toward the south,
and fell on his face to the ground, and bowed himself three times,
and they kissed one another, and wept one with another,
until David exceeded.
And Jonathan said to David, Go in peace.
For as much as we have sworn both of us
in the name of the Lord, saying,
The Lord be between me and thee,
and between my seed and thy seed forever.
And he rose into part of it, and Jonathan went into the sea.
Now, are you seeing from this story
that such an important part of friendship is loyalty?
I mean, are you noticing that's a big part of it?
This covenant that they're making is a loyalty oath,
saying, I'm not going to turn my back on you.
I'm not going to forsake you.
I'm going to stay with you.
I'm going to stick with you closer than a brother.
I'm going to be there for you when you need me.
That's what friendship is.
Look, if you would, at one more place about Jonathan and David.
Look at 2 Samuel 1.
Go a little bit forward in your Bible.
You know, the reason I'm talking about this,
a lot of friends are here today in God tomorrow.
You know that if you've been around for a long time.
I've had friends that have been my best, closest friends growing up.
Where they are today, I know not.
And where they were back then, I knew not.
Whenever any adversity comes along, they are gone.
But, you know, we as God's people,
we as born-again believers who love God so many Christians, zealous Christians,
hey, we ought not be the kind of friends that people can't count on.
We ought not be the kind of fair-weather friend that the world is.
We ought to be the kind of friend that sticks closer than a brother
where somebody can say, when nobody else cares about me,
when nobody else can help me, when nobody else will do anything for me,
hey, I know, I know that so-and-so is my friend.
Well, that's the kind of friend that you ought to be.
And, boy, wouldn't it be great to have a friend like that
and would to God that everybody would be that kind of friend
and have that kind of friend.
But look at verse 17 of 2 Samuel 1.
This is after Saul and Jonathan have been killed.
The Bible reads in verse 17,
And David lamented with this lamentation over Saul and over Jonathan his son.
Also he bade them teach the children of Judah the use of the bow.
Behold, it is written in the book of Jasher.
And, by the way, people who don't understand the Bible,
oh, the book of Jasher.
It's a missing book in the Bible.
Oh, man, there's other books out there.
And then somebody writes the book of Jasher at the top
and buries it underground for a while,
and then somebody digs it up.
Oh, we found more of the Bible.
Look, did it ever cross your mind that there are other books in this world
besides the Bible
and that the Bible might mention some of them every once in a while?
Think this through for a second.
This is the only book that God wrote.
It's called the Holy Bible.
But did you know that there are millions of books in this world?
And did you know that there are history books in this world?
And you'll read in 1 and 2 Chronicles,
and it'll say,
Is it not written in the book of the chronicles of the kings of Judah and Israel?
Hey, look, so what?
They wrote down, they chronicled the history.
They chronicled the events of the lives of these kings.
He says, hey, if you want to read more about it,
you can read about it in the chronicles of the books.
It doesn't mean it's written by God.
It doesn't mean it's the Holy Bible.
The book of Jasher is not the Holy Bible.
It's not the Scriptures.
It's a book that is turned to dust.
It's gone.
As all books of this world eventually die and are gone,
this is the only book that's lasted through the ages.
You can't find books that are 3,000 years old.
You just can't find them.
The oldest book in the world is the Epic of Gilgamesh.
It's about 4,000 years old.
It's missing huge chunks.
No book has survived like only the Holy Bible has survived.
God's word, he said,
heaven and earth shall pass away,
but my words shall not pass away.
The book of Jasher is not God's words.
It's the book of Jasher.
Some guy named Jasher wrote a book.
Big deal.
Okay, there's nothing to do with the sermon,
but I just want to teach you that,
because a lot of people get hung up on silly things,
you know, like that.
Oh, there's more to the Bible.
You don't even read the Bible that you have.
Why are you looking for more?
You've never even read the 66 that you've got.
You're looking for book number 67?
I'll never understand that.
But anyway, he says that he bade them teach the children of Judah
the use of the bow.
He's saying that they taught them how to use a bow and arrow,
because that was Jonathan's weapon of choice.
Remember, he was practicing archery a lot in the story,
and so he taught them that as a way to remember Jonathan.
And the Bible says in verse 19,
the beauty of Israel is slain upon thy high places.
How are the mighty fallen, talking about Saul and Jonathan,
tell it not in Gath.
Publish it not in the streets of Ashkelon,
lest the daughters of the Philistines rejoice,
lest the daughters of the uncircumcised triumph,
ye mountains of Gilboa.
Let there be no dew, neither let there be rain upon you,
nor fields of offerings,
for there the shield of the mighty is vilely cast away.
The shield of Saul, as though he had not been anointed with oil,
from the blood of the slain, from the fat of the mighty,
the bow of Jonathan turned not back,
and the sword of Saul returned not empty.
Saul and Jonathan were lovely and pleasant in their lives,
and in their death they were not divided.
They were swifter than the eagles, they were stronger than lions.
Ye daughters of Israel, weep over Saul,
who clothed you in scarlet with other delights,
who put on ornaments of gold upon your apparel.
How are the mighty fallen in the midst of the battle?
O Jonathan, thou wast slain in thine high places.
I am distressed for thee, my brother Jonathan."
See, he wasn't really his brother,
because he's a friend that was like a brother.
He said,
I am distressed for thee, my brother Jonathan.
Very pleasant hast thou been unto me,
for thy love to me was wonderful,
passing the love of women.
How are the mighty fallen and the weapons of war perish?
You say, passing? Oh, is he queer? Was he gay?
No, look, get your stinking mind out of the gutter.
I'll tell you right now, because if you read the Bible,
did you know that love means something other than physical love?
I don't know if you know that,
because if you watch enough TV and enough radio,
you'll get your mind so warped.
You'll think that the only kind of love is some kind of a physical, perverted act.
No, my friend, there's a love.
He said, Jonathan loved me more than any...
He said, Jonathan loved me more than my own wife loved me.
That's what he's saying.
He's saying, passing the love of women more than...
And, you know, David had a few wives.
Maybe that's why they didn't love him as much.
But he said, more than my wife even loved me.
More than any woman in this world loved me.
The person who loved me more than anybody else was Jonathan.
And he said, I'm distressed,
because my one true friend has died.
And he says, that makes me sad to think that my friend is dead.
And he says, and notice the friendship that David had toward Saul.
I mean, Saul came to the point where he's trying to kill David,
and he says, Saul is still my friend.
He said, I still love Saul.
I'm still going to say good things about Saul.
I'm going to speak well about Saul.
I'm going to do good to Saul.
And so we see these two great friends,
both of them were great friends,
both David and Jonathan, the great friends that they were.
Later on, we'll see, won't turn there for sake of time,
because I want to get to a few other examples in the Bible.
But we'll see later that David, just out of the blue,
says, is there anyone left that's alive of Jonathan's seed
that I might show the love of God unto him?
And, of course, they found a young man who was lame in his feet,
who couldn't walk.
His name was Mephiboshet.
And he took him into his own house,
set him at his own table, fed him every day,
gave him all kinds of land, gave him all kinds of money.
He said, I'm going to do something for my friend.
Years later, even after he's dead,
I want to do something for my friend.
Hey, that's the kind of friend that you ought to be.
You ought to sit down and say, what can I do to help my friend?
What can I do to show the love of God to my friend?
We're not friends anymore.
We don't go to the same school anymore.
Oh, she moved out of town.
We're not friends anymore.
No, I say, what can I do for my friend?
Oh, she said something bad about me.
He said something bad about me one time,
so now he's not my friend anymore.
Look, Saul's trying to kill him and saying bad things about him.
I'm going to tell you something.
David had the right kind of friendship where he says,
maybe I don't have a lot of friends,
but when I choose for somebody to be my friend,
that's my lifelong friend that I'm going to be loyal to.
And he says, I'm going to stand up for them when it's not popular,
and I'm going to stand up for my friend
even when everybody else turns their back.
I'm going to stand with my friend.
That's the kind of friend that God wants you to be.
And so don't ask yourself, is this person being friendly to me?
Hey, show yourself friendly.
Say, what can I do for my friend?
And you know what, when you do that,
you might gain some lifelong friends along the way
that are a friend to you back, like Paul did.
But number five, we saw the first two good friends
were Aquila and Priscilla,
and then we saw the third and fourth good friends
that we saw were Jonathan and David.
But look at good friend number five in 2 Timothy chapter 1,
we'll see the fifth example in the Bible of just a great friend,
somebody who was a good friend.
Look at 2 Timothy chapter 1 and verse number 14.
2 Timothy 1.14, the Bible reads,
That good thing which was committed unto thee,
keep by the Holy Ghost which dwelleth in us.
This thou knowest, Paul speaking,
that all they which are in Asia be turned away from me.
Isn't that a sad statement?
Another time in the Bible, Paul said that he preached
the gospel to everyone in Asia.
Remember he'd started churches in Asia?
I mean, remember the church at Ephesus that he started?
Remember the letter to the Ephesians?
A whole big, great group of people there that were with him.
Remember all these churches that he started?
He says, all they which are in Asia be turned away from me.
Isn't that sad?
Of whom are Phygelus and Hermogenes,
he lists a few of them who really, he thought,
were his friends that turned their back on him.
But then look what he says,
The Lord give mercy unto the house of Onesiphorus,
for he oft refreshed me and was not ashamed of my chain.
See, why did these other people turn their back on him?
Well, probably because he was thrown in jail.
See, Paul was thrown in jail and they turned their back on him
and said, well, we don't want anything to do with Paul.
We don't want to be lumped in with him.
We don't want to be associated with him
because we might end up in the slammer ourselves.
And so, sorry, Paul, you're on your own, buddy.
I know you won me to Christ, I know you taught me the Bible,
but sorry, you're not very lovable right now.
You're not in a position where you can do anything for me right now.
And so, sorry, I'm going to have to forsake you.
Now these people were not good friends to Paul at all,
but one man, Onesiphorus, said,
I'm still going to refresh Paul
and I'm not going to be ashamed of his chain.
And in verse 17 it says,
but when he was in Rome, he sought me out very diligently and found me.
The Lord grant unto him that he may find mercy of the Lord in that day,
and in how many things he ministered unto be at Ephesus.
See, that's back when he was in Asia.
That's how we know Onesiphorus was from Asia,
because Ephesus is in Asia.
It says, in how many things he ministered unto be at Ephesus,
thou knowest very well.
But look back, if you would, a little bit earlier in the chapter.
Look at, let me turn back there, 2 Timothy chapter 1,
notice what it says in verse number 7, 2 Timothy 1, 7,
for God hath not given us the spirit of fear,
but of power and of love and of a sound mind.
Be not, thou, therefore, ashamed.
Don't be a wimp. Don't be scared.
He says, be not, thou, therefore, ashamed of the testimony of our Lord,
nor of me, his prisoner.
See, it's one thing to say, I'll never be ashamed of Jesus Christ,
but God takes it a step further and says,
don't just never be ashamed of Jesus Christ.
Hey, don't ever be ashamed of the people that are taking a stand for Jesus Christ,
like Paul was.
And so he says, don't be ashamed of the gospel of Jesus Christ,
but don't be ashamed of the apostle Paul either, okay?
And then he goes on to talk about a man who was not ashamed of his shame,
who oft refreshed him.
Isn't it so refreshing to find somebody who's a real good friend,
when you're in jail in Rome, as he was,
and Onesiphorus went there and he couldn't find Paul,
and he had to look and he had to look and search,
and he's asking people if he couldn't find the right prison, maybe,
or he's looking through the phone book, he's trying to find him,
and he's looking and looking,
and finally he found him because he said,
I'm not going to give up until I find my friend,
because I know that back home everybody's turned their back on Paul.
He says, I'm going to go seek him out.
I'm going to go find him.
I'm going to go refresh him.
I'm going to be his friend.
See, that's what being a friend is.
It's a lot different than what the Bible says,
or what people say to the world,
oh yeah, we're friends.
Are you really friends?
Are you really a friend to that person?
Do you stick with them closer than like a brother?
And so we saw five good examples of friends.
I've got to hurry, but let me show you some bad examples of friends in the Bible.
I'll give you one at 2 Samuel 13.
Back to the book of 2 Samuel, chapter 13,
we'll see an example of a bad friend in the Bible.
2 Samuel 13, I'm just going to show you two quick examples of a bad friend in the Bible.
The Bible reads,
The son of David had a fair sister, whose name was Tamar.
And Amnon, the son of David, loved her,
and Amnon was so vexed that he fell sick for his sister, Tamar.
For she was a virgin, and Amnon thought it hard for him to do anything to her.
But Amnon had a friend.
See, everything was fine until he had this bad friend,
whose name was Jonadab, the son of Shema, David's brother,
and Jonadab was a very subtle man.
And he said to him,
Why art thou, being the king's son, lean from day to day?
Wilt thou not tell me?
And Amnon said unto him,
I love Tamar, my brother Absalom's sister.
And Jonadab said unto him,
Lay thee down on thy bed, and make thyself sick.
And when thy father cometh to see thee, say unto him,
I pray thee, let my sister Tamar come and give me meat,
and dress the meat in my sight,
that I may see it and eat it at her hand.
So Amnon laid down and made himself sick, and on and on.
You probably know the story.
What a horrible friend.
A friend that comes to you and says,
Why do you...
Come on.
You think that watching some...
watching one movie at the theater is going to kill you?
Come on.
Why are you so lean from day to day?
Why are you so sad?
Why are you so depressed, as Jonadab said to him?
You know, why don't you just give yourself what you want?
Huh?
Why don't you just gratify your flesh?
Hey, why are you so sad?
Quit being so sad.
Hey, do what you want to do.
Go where you want to go.
Who cares what God says?
Hey, drink a beer with me.
It'll be fun.
Hey, that's the wrong kind of friends.
You don't want to have those kind of friends around.
I don't think that Amnon...
I don't know.
Maybe he was, but who knows if Amnon was really that bad of a guy
until he started hanging around with his friend.
And who knows how long he'd been hanging around with his friend.
But this friend had crept in.
He was very subtle.
David probably would have known what kind of friend he was.
He probably never would have let him hang around him.
But somehow this bad friend creeped in
and perverted his mind so much
that he committed an act of incest and rape
that God punishes with the death penalty.
Hey, I'm going to tell you something.
Friends that are wrong friends can drag you down very easily,
and so you ought to pick the right kind of friends
because a bad friend will be one that leads you into sin.
Here's another famous verse I'll read quickly.
Ye adulterers and adulteresses,
know ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God?
Therefore, whosoever will be a friend of the world is the enemy of God.
See, did you know that a friend
can actually come between you and God
and put you at enmity with God himself,
the wrong kind of a friend?
Deuteronomy 13, flip back if you would to Deuteronomy 13,
fifth book in the Bible, Deuteronomy chapter 13,
look at verse 6.
And we'll see the same,
this is all under the canopy of the friend
who tries to lead you into sin
and lead you into ungodliness.
Amnon was the example.
But it reads in Deuteronomy 13, 6,
If thy brother, the son of thy mother,
or thy son, or thy daughter,
the wife of thy bosom, or thy friend,
which is as thine own soul, enticed thee secretly, saying,
Let us go and serve other gods which thou hast not known,
thou nor thy fathers,
namely of the gods of the people which are round about you,
which are very perverted, sick, satanic gods, by the way.
And that's why God destroyed them.
Or far from thee, from the one end of the earth,
even unto the other end of the earth,
thou shalt not consent unto him, nor hearken unto him,
neither shall thine eye pity him,
neither shalt thou spare, neither shalt thou conceal him,
but thou shalt surely kill him.
Thine hand shall be first upon him to put him to death,
and afterward the hands of all the people,
and thou shalt stone him with stones that he die,
because he hath sought to thrust thee away
from the Lord thy God,
which brought thee out of the land of Egypt
from the house of bondage,
and all Israel shall hear and fear, and shall do no more,
and he sets wickedness as this is among you.
See, loyalty to friends.
There is a line that's drawn of how loyal to be your friends.
You ought to be loyal to your friends to death.
But God says here, people can cross a line
where you ought to be more loyal to Jesus Christ
than you are to any friend, okay?
And so if a friend is trying to get you
into wicked, perverted sin,
much like John Adam was, or much like the story here,
where they're trying to get them into Baal worship
and Satan worship, like the people of the land did,
he says, you know what?
You ought to just cut that friend loose.
And so there is a time when you don't be loyal to your friends
because a friend who will lead you into sin,
a friend who's going to tear you down,
you've got to cut them loose or they're going to destroy you.
And so that's the only time that you are disloyal to your friends
is when you have to be loyal to Jesus Christ.
But number two bad example, that was bad example number one,
the friend who drags you into sin.
Well, get away from him.
Stay away from him.
You find yourself being around somebody,
acting a little different than you normally act.
You find yourself being around a friend,
and you start maybe being a little more sinful,
being a little more sinful than you normally are.
You start maybe doing things you normally wouldn't do.
You've got to get away from that person.
That person's tearing you down.
They're dragging you down.
Get away from them.
You say, well, I'm going to straighten them out.
Look, they'll straighten you out.
Okay, they'll make you like them.
See, iron sharpened with iron.
The people that will help you and the people,
you say, well, I want to help them be more spiritual.
Hey, find somebody who's already spiritual,
help them be more spiritual.
That's what the Bible says.
Yeah, and they can help you be more spiritual.
But you don't get to hang around some pervert,
some wicked sinner,
and say, well, I'm going to straighten them out.
No, they'll tear you down.
They'll drag you down.
And so that's where loyalty stops.
Loyalty's vital.
That's what the whole sermon's been about.
But loyalty stops when you have to stop being loyal to Jesus Christ.
You say, well, my loyalty's with Jesus.
Don't be so loyal to me that if I start preaching out of the NIV,
you say, well, you know, we've got to stick with Pastor Anderson.
Hey, tell Pastor Anderson to go jump in a lake.
Tell Pastor Anderson to go fly a kite
and go to a real church that preaches the King James Bible.
I hope you know that.
And so that's where loyalty stops.
But bad friend number two, look at Matthew chapter 26.
Matthew chapter number 26.
And look at verse number 46,
and we'll see the second example that I'm going to give you this morning
of a bad friend in the Bible.
Matthew 26, 46.
The Bible reads in Matthew 6, 20, 46, whatever that was.
Matthew 26, 46.
Rise, let us be going.
Behold, he is at hand that doth betray me.
And while he yet spake, lo, Judas, one of the twelve,
came and with him a great multitude with swords and staves
from the chief priests and elders of the people.
Now he that betrayed him gave them a sign saying,
Whomsoever I shall kiss, that same is he, hold him fast.
And forthwith he came to Jesus and said,
Hail, Master, and kissed him.
And Jesus said unto him, Friend?
You see, isn't that interesting?
Jesus said unto him, Friend?
Wherefore art thou come?
Then came they and laid hands on Jesus and took him.
Well, you see, Jesus said, You're my friend.
I mean, he considered Judas Iscariot his friend.
He was friendly to him.
I mean, he did everything for him.
And he considered him a friend.
And he said, Friend, why are you doing this to me?
Why are you, are you stabbing me in the back like this?
And then look at the end of the story,
Matthew 27, 1, just quickly.
Matthew 27, 1, the Bible reads,
When the morning was come, all the chief priests and elders of the people
took counsel against Jesus to put him to death.
And when they had bound him, they led him away
and delivered him to Pontius Pilate the governor.
Then Judas, which had betrayed him,
when he saw that he was condemned, repented himself
and brought again the 30 pieces of silver to the chief priests and elders, saying,
I have sinned and that I have betrayed the innocent blood.
And they said, What is that to us?
Seed out of that.
And he cast down the pieces of silver in the temple and departed
and went out and hanged himself.
And so here's Judas Iscariot, betrayed his own good friend.
He betrayed his best friend.
And you know what?
He felt so bad about it that he actually committed suicide
because it was so horrible of him to be so disloyal and to betray his friend.
The Bible reads in Psalm 41, 9, don't turn there.
Yea, mine own familiar friend.
This is Jesus speaking prophetically.
Yea, mine own familiar friend in whom I trusted,
which did eat of my bread and lifted up his heel against me.
Zechariah 13, 6, And one shall say unto him,
What are these wounds in thine hands?
Then he shall answer, Those with which I was wounded in the house of my friends.
In Luke 21, 16, the Bible says about us as Christians, as believers,
he says, And you shall be betrayed, both by parents and brethren
and kinsfolk and friends, and some of you shall they cause to be put to death.
And so there's two kinds of bad friends.
There's the bad friend who leads you into sin.
Or, if you're leading somebody into sin, you're a bad friend.
But number two, the second bad kind of friend that there is,
is the kind of friend who's disloyal.
The kind of friend that will turn their back on their friend.
And that's exactly what Judas Iscariot was.
And Jesus said, I'm still your friend.
But Judas turned around and stabbed him in the back
and he felt so sick about it that he actually killed himself.
Well, you don't have to turn there. I'll read this for you.
Micah 7, 4, the Bible says, The best of them is a sobrier.
The most upright is sharper than a thorn hedge.
The day of the watchman and thy visitation cometh,
now shall be their perplexity. Trust ye not in a friend.
This is what God says in Micah 7, 5.
Trust ye not in a friend. Put ye not confidence in a guide.
Keep the doors of thy mouth from her that lighten thy bosom.
For the Son dishonereth the Father.
The daughter riseth up against her mother.
The daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law.
A man's enemies are the men of his own house.
Therefore, I will look unto the Lord.
I will wait for the God of my salvation. My God will hear me.
So what God's saying here?
Any friend could let you down, is what he's saying.
Friends will let you down. Family members will let you down.
He said that's why you've got to look to the Lord.
He's the ultimate friend.
Now, we saw the good examples of what we ought to be as a friend.
We ought to be loyal even when others are as loyal as Saul was.
We ought to be sharpening those that were around, building them up spiritually.
Hey, we ought to put out our necks for those that are our friends.
We ought to stay with them even when everybody else turns their back on them
and say, I'm going to stand with you because you are my friend.
I'm going to be loyal to my friend.
But the sad truth is that there are friends out there that are going to let you down.
The Judas Iscariots of this world that are going to betray you,
that are going to turn their back on you,
and that's why you need to look to the Lord.
He's the only one you can really trust.
You ought to be a trustworthy friend, but it's kind of a one-way street in a way.
You've got to be the best of friends to your friends,
but you just have to realize the fact that they may not be the best friend to you,
but you still ought to be their friend
and see what you can do to love them and be a good friend to them.
Which brings me to my conclusion.
Look at John 15, and I'll show you the last scripture, John 15.
And I'm going to show you what Jesus says about his friends.
The Bible says in John 15, 14,
Ye are my friends, if ye do whatsoever I command you.
Henceforth I call you not servants,
for the servant knoweth not what his Lord doeth,
but I have called you friends,
for all things that I have heard of my Father I have made known unto you.
So let me ask you this. Who was the friend first?
Us or Jesus?
Because Jesus says in verse 15,
I have called you friends. That's past tense.
He says, I've called you friends. The Bible says,
We love him because he first loved us.
See, a man that hath friends must show himself friendly.
See, Jesus was the one who, like Jonathan, said,
Let me be your friend.
Who, like Paul, said to Aquila and Priscilla,
Let me be your friend. I'm going to be your friend.
I'm going to do something for you to start this friendship.
Priscilla and Aquila turned around and said to Paul,
We're going to be your friend. We're going to help you.
Onesiphorus said, I'm going to be Paul's friend,
even when nobody else will be his friend.
Jesus says, I've called you friends.
I loved you first. I'm extending my friendship to you
because I've laid down my life for you, my friends.
But then he says, You're my friends.
He's talking about them being a friend back to him.
He says, You're my friends if you do whatsoever I command you.
Now, we know that Jesus is our friend.
What a friend we have in Jesus.
All our sins and griefs to bear.
What a privilege to carry everything to God in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful?
Who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness. Take it to the Lord in prayer.
But I'm going to ask you something.
It's a sermon about being a good friend.
And you know what? You ought to be a good friend to your friends.
You say, I don't have any friends.
Hey, pick somebody. Pick somebody to be friend.
I'm not saying that you're going to just be friendly and jovial to them.
As the world says, I'm talking about being friendly to them.
Like, pick somebody and say, I'm going to show this person the love of God.
Or, I'm just going to decide in my mind right now, so-and-so is my friend.
If they ever need anything, maybe they don't need anything right now, it's fine.
But if they ever need anything, I'm going to be there for them
to give them what they need because they're my friend.
Why don't you just decide that right now about your friends?
And why don't you say, when everybody turns their back on them,
if they end up in the slammer, if they end up in the poorhouse,
if they end up being blasphemed and maligned,
and if they end up down on their luck, hey, I'm going to be there for them.
I'm going to stand up for my friends.
But you know what? The most important person that you ought to be a friend to
is the person who's been the greatest friend to you,
who's never going to stop being your friend,
who first loved you, and that's Jesus Christ.
How are you going to be Jesus' friend?
By doing the things that he commands you.
He says the way you show your friendship to me is by doing what I've told you to do.
He says that's the friendship that you have with Jesus.
Now, when you're friends with another person,
it's not like, well, you want to be my friend?
Do whatever I tell you to do.
That's not the way it works from person to person.
But God says this is a little bit different kind of a friendship.
The kind of friendship that you have is where you're loyal,
where you're going to do something for somebody,
you're going to love them at all times, the Bible says,
a friend loveth at all times, and brothers are born for adversity.
But God is saying here there's a different kind of a friendship that you have with me
because I gave you so much more than any other friend would ever give you.
And so the way that you show me your friendship,
he says you're my friends.
I'm not saying I'm not your friend because I'm your friend anyway.
He says I've called you friends already, but he says you're my friends
if you do whatsoever I've commanded you.
Jesus then said a few chapters earlier,
he said if you love me, keep my commandments.
Show your love and your friendship to God who loves you, who's your friend,
and keep his commandments.
And then follow his example where he said I'll lay down my life for my friends.
How are you doing toward your friends?
Let's bow our heads and have a word of prayer.
God, please help everyone in this room, myself included.
Help us to be the kind of friend that you'd have us to be.
Help us not to be the shallow kind of a friend that the world has where we're friends.
You know, I'm somebody's friend now, but then I'm not two years later.
But God, help us to be friends that will stick closer than brothers.
And Father, help everyone in this room to be a friend.
And then God, please bless everyone in this room who is a friend to others
by helping them to get a friend.