2 Samuel 13, if you remember in chapters 11 and 12, we had the story with the great sin of David and Bathsheba, and killing of Uriah the Hittite.
And now David is going to begin to reap what he has sown, and a lot of bad things are going to happen in the life of David from this time forward, and it's starting here in chapter 13.
This is one of the most heartbreaking stories in the Bible when you read this, beginning in verse number 1.
The Bible reads, It came to pass after this that Absalom the son of David had a fair sister whose name was Tamar, and Amnon the son of David loved her, and Amnon was so vexed that he fell sick for his sister Tamar, for she was a virgin, and Amnon thought it hard for him to do anything to her.
So this is his half-sister, and he is in love with her, and is just vexed. He just can't get her off his mind no matter what.
But he doesn't want to do anything to her, but it says in verse 3, But Amnon had a friend.
So he wasn't going to commit this sin. The Bible is real clear to tell us that at least, even though he had these wicked desires in his heart, he at least had the decency not to act on them.
But his friend is the one who's going to bolster him in his sin. It says, But Amnon had a friend whose name was Jonadab the son of Shema, David's brother, and Jonadab was a very subtle man.
Sort of like the serpent in the Garden of Eden was more subtle than all the beasts in the field.
And we need to be very careful of the kind of friends that we hang around with, because your friends can literally make or break you when it comes to your Christian life.
I've seen people grow very quickly and become a great Christian just by getting in church and getting a circle of godly friends.
And if you surround yourself with godly people, the Bible says iron sharpens iron, and that's why God gave us the church in the New Testament.
So that we could have that fellowship at the assembly and build each other up and edify one another and be exhorting one another.
But the opposite is true, that if you get around the wrong friends, you can go down a very dark path very quickly.
And I heard this said, you are right now or you soon shall be what your friends are.
You can tell a lot about someone by the type of people that they hang around with and the friends that they have.
You know, birds of a feather flock together, right? You can tell a man who boozes by the company he chooses.
So, you know, you have to be careful who you hang around with because of the fact that your friends can either lift you up and build you up or they can drag you down.
And I've noticed that I begin to pick up the mannerisms of the people that I spend time with.
And I start to talk like, and I have kind of a dominant personality, I'm obviously a leader, I'm a pastor of a church.
But even I get around people and start picking up their mannerisms and picking up different things that they say.
Because it's just human nature. We're all going to be affected by the people around.
Even if you have a strong personality, you're going to be affected by your friends.
The best way to grow in your Christian life is to get around good friends and let them build you up and motivate you.
That's why church is so important. And by the way, that's why the people who just listen online, that's what they miss.
By not getting into an independent fundamental Baptist church, they're not getting the friendships and the fellowships.
You know, you can't put your hand on the screen and get that at home.
That's why it's important to physically show up and go to church and get around God's people.
I firmly believe that your social life should be based mainly around church.
That should be the nucleus of it.
And obviously you're going to have friends and acquaintances outside of church.
But honestly, best case scenario, your closest friends are people from church.
Or people from another church of like faith and practice.
But when you just have unsaved friends that you're hanging around with all the time, or just super liberal Christians,
that it's going to have an effect on you. It's going to drag you down.
And especially if you have a friend like Jonadab.
And I tell you what, there are so many stories I can think of of people that I've known who hung around with bad friends and it took them down a horrible path in their life.
In fact, one of the best things I've seen some people do when they get saved, when people first get saved, is if they just move somewhere else.
Because then they're not around all their same friends.
Because you'll see people get saved, but they're around the same friends, same family that's dragging them down.
Just like Abraham had to get out of Ur of the Chaldees.
I've seen a guy who got saved, nothing changed for a few years, but then he moved to another state, all of a sudden he's growing in the Lord.
Because he got in church and started building his friendships at that church and all the old drug friends and drunkard friends are left behind.
It's so important who your friends are. It can literally make or break your Christian life.
Here it led to this horrible sin when Jonadab tells him, hey you can do this.
And look what he tells him to do, this wicked advice.
He said in verse 4, and he said unto him, why art thou being the king's son lean from day to day? Wilt thou not tell me?
And Amnon said unto him, I love Tamar, my brother Absalom's sister.
And Jonadab said unto him, lay thee down on thy bed and make thyself sick.
And when thy father cometh to see thee, say unto him, I pray thee, let my sister Tamar come and give me meat and dress the meat in my sight that I may see it and eat it at her end.
So Amnon laid down and made himself sick and when the king was come to see him, Amnon said unto the king, I pray thee, let Tamar my sister come and make me a couple of cakes in my sight that I may eat at her hand.
Then David sent home to Tamar saying, go now to thy brother Amnon's house and dress him meat.
So Tamar went to her brother Amnon's house and he was laid down and she took flour and kneaded it and made cakes in his sight and did bake the cakes.
And she took a pan and poured them out before him but he refused to eat and Amnon said, how about all men from me?
And they went out every man from him.
And Amnon said unto Tamar, bring the meat into the chamber that I may eat of thine hand.
And Tamar took the cakes which she had made and brought them into the chamber to Amnon her brother.
And when she had brought them unto him to eat, he took hold of her and said unto her, come lie with me my sister.
Now this is wicked for a whole bunch of different reasons.
Number one, this is his half sister.
And the Bible explicitly prohibits anyone from marrying anyone that is near of kin to them, the Bible says.
Do not approach unto anyone that is near of kin unto you to uncover their nakedness.
So obviously, and it even specifically brings up that a half sibling is too close of a relative, okay.
And I should go without saying but it said, you know, not your sister and even if it's just your half sister.
Even if it's just the daughter of your father or the daughter of your mother but not the other.
You must not, you know, marry anyone that is near of kin to you.
We know this today as incest.
You know, this is a wicked sin.
But secondly, having this type of physical relationship outside of marriage is always wrong.
No matter how distant of a relative.
You know, no matter how right the match would be.
No, this activity needs to be kept within marriage otherwise it is defined by the Bible as fornication.
And the Bible says marriage is honorable in all and the bed undefiled but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.
The Bible says for this is the will of God, even your sanctification that you should abstain from fornication.
The Bible says flee fornication.
Every sin that a man doeth is without the body.
But he that comitteth fornication sinneth against his own body.
The Bible says that I wrote unto you an epistle not to company with fornicators.
Don't even hang around with fornicators.
He said not all together with the fornicators of this world.
For then must your needs go out of the world.
But he says now I've written unto you not to keep company if any man that is called a brother be a fornicator.
He lists other sins.
But he says if any man that's called a brother be a fornicator with such and one know not to eat.
For what have I to do to judge them also that are without?
Do not ye judge them that are within?
But them that are without God judgeth.
Wherefore put away from among yourselves that wicked person.
I mean the Bible makes it clear that fornication is a major sin to the point where if a brother in the church is committing fornication,
the Bible says that they must be cast out of the church.
He said put away from among yourselves that wicked person.
And in 1 Corinthians 5 that was the case where the young man was committing fornication and Paul rebuked them for not throwing him out.
He said cast him out, put away from among yourselves that wicked person.
But today we have an attitude that fornication is not a big deal.
Well as long as you love each other is what you'll hear the world tell you.
Oh if you love each other, you know, it's just so long as it's not casual they say.
I don't care how formal you make it my friend.
The formality that's needed is a ring on your finger and vows set unto God.
And it needs to be official marriage.
That's the formality that's needed.
Now you say well if you love each other.
But here's the thing about this.
In this story we start out with a statement in verse number 1 that says at the end of the verse there.
Everybody look down at your Bible.
And Amnon the son of David loved her.
Okay.
Now this is coming from the narrator of the Bible.
Telling us hey he loved her right.
But look what happens after he lies with her.
It says in verse number.
Of course you know it says in verse 13.
Well let's start in verse number 12.
She answering him.
Nay my brother do not force me for no such thing ought to be done in Israel.
Do not thou this folly and I wither shall I cause my shame to go.
And as for thee thou shall be as one of the fools in Israel.
Now therefore I pray thee speak unto the king for he will not withhold me from thee.
Howbeit he would not hearken unto her voice.
But being stronger than she forced her and lay with her.
Then Amnon hated her exceedingly.
Now isn't that interesting.
That in verse 1 it says that he loved her.
But then after he lies with her it says in verse 15.
Then Amnon hated her exceedingly.
So that the hatred wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he had loved her.
And Amnon said unto her arise be gone.
Now this is a story that plays out all the time.
Now the difference is obviously the Bible is giving us a really extreme example here.
Because he really wants to drive in the point with us.
But this example is indicative of a lot of other situations in this world.
Where a man will love a woman.
And literally women today feel that if they will submit unto this physical relationship before marriage.
This fornication.
That basically that's going to make their boyfriend love them more or stay with them.
And that's going to make him be loyal to.
But you know what.
What does the Bible say.
You know here when fornication is taking place.
It does not create a stronger bond of love and respect.
It actually creates hatred.
Now the reason why is that the Bible says that love is the fulfilling of the law.
The Bible says this is love that we walk after his commandments.
And the Bible says oh no man anything but to love one another.
For he that loveth another had fulfilled the law.
And he said for all that is in the law.
Thou shalt not kill.
Thou shalt not commit adultery.
Thou shalt not steal.
Thou shalt not bear false witness.
Thou shalt not covet.
And if there be any other commandment.
It is briefly comprehended in this saying.
Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.
Love worketh no ill to his neighbor.
Are you listening.
Love worketh no ill to his neighbor.
Therefore love is the fulfilling of the law.
So people can say oh it's so loving to go out and have a girlfriend and commit fornication
and so forth.
But fornication is not love.
And fornication is not making love or it's not going to bring more love into the relationship.
It's actually going to destroy the love that's in that relationship.
And even love that legitimately exists.
I believe the Bible when it said that Amnon loved her.
So even though there was some love there in the beginning sin destroyed that love.
Fornication destroyed the love that was there.
Instead of that love being preserved it was destroyed.
Okay.
And this is a situation that is often played out.
And honestly women are very foolish to go out and just allow themselves to be taken
advantage of.
Now here in this case it's not her fault because she was forced.
She was trapped in to this situation.
And there was nothing she could have done about it.
I mean she's brought into this situation.
Everybody else is sent out.
All the doors are shut.
He's much stronger than her.
Not her fault whatsoever.
And the Bible talks about you know this type of a situation that she is totally innocent here.
She's a victim of course.
It's as if.
And by the way this is such a major sin God compares it unto murder.
God compares rape unto murder in the Bible.
He said that if a woman is out in the field and a man takes hold of her and lies with
her and forces her it says that it is as if a man rose up and slew his neighbor.
He said that's what it's like.
That's what it's compared unto.
In the sense that the victim is the victim and the perpetrator is the perpetrator.
And in the sense of the magnitude of the crime.
And that is why this crime was punishable by death under the Mosaic law.
This crime of forcing a virgin in this situation.
Punishable by death.
And so Amnon is going to receive death.
But he's not going to receive it through the proper channels.
Because it really should have been King David.
You know who's carrying out the judgment that needs to take place here.
But that's not what happens.
But we see he hated her exceedingly.
So that the hatred verse 15 wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he had loved her.
This is what kind of respect and love you get ladies by committing fornication.
This is the love and respect that you're going to expect from men.
And look we need a generation of Christian young ladies that value and respect themselves.
And that understand the value of their bodies and the value of their soul and who they are.
And would not just go out and just be cheap.
Have you ever heard that term? Women being cheap?
You know just a cheap woman.
Being a floozy.
And we live in a nation today where so many women are just so loose.
And it's foolish for so many reasons.
But there's a saying often that people use.
Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?
And there are women out there who will just keep dating a guy or living with a guy.
Who won't make a commitment unto them.
And they just get strung along, strung along.
And eventually they're just going to be discarded.
Just as Tamar is discarded here in this situation.
It's a really sad story.
Now let me tell you something.
When I read this story, I don't know about you but every time I read this story it makes me mad.
You know I get very emotional when I read the Bible sometimes.
I really get into the story when I read the Bible.
I don't know how you are but when I read any book I always get really into it.
But especially when you're reading the Bible you get into the story.
And this story probably more than any other story in the Bible.
I think this story makes me madder than any story in the Bible.
I mean it just makes me so angry.
You feel so bad for Tamar.
And just how badly she's treated here.
First she's forced and then he hates her and just sends her.
And she even, look what she says in verse 16.
She said unto him, there's no cause.
This evil in sending me away is greater than the other that thou didst unto me.
But he would not hearken unto her.
And he called his servant that ministered unto him.
And said, put now this woman out from me and bolt the door after her.
And it says of course, she had a garment of diverse colors upon her.
For with such robes were the king's daughters that were virgins apparelled.
Then his servant brought her out and bolted the door after.
And when I read this story I get enraged.
And I get very angry at Amnon.
Just what a jerk. What an evil person.
And you just want to see him punished for what he's done.
Just ruining somebody's life.
I mean just destroy, I mean here she is this sweet virgin girl.
And now her life is ruined.
And then she rends her garment.
She's just completely destitute now.
And it's just such a terrible story. Why?
So that he could enjoy a few moments of pleasure and then decide it wasn't even what he wanted in the first place.
Now this is something to do with human nature that I see all the way through the Bible from Genesis to Revelation.
This idea of fixating upon one thing that you can't have.
It goes all the way back to the Garden of Eden.
Of all the trees of the garden thou mayest freely eat.
I mean all these wonderful choices.
But there's just one that you can't eat.
The tree in the midst of the garden.
And what do they want to do?
Eat of the tree in the midst.
What? They could have had it all.
But they just want the one that they can't have.
Another example of this that comes to mind is in the story of Esther with Haman.
Haman is such a successful guy.
He's the second ruler in the kingdom.
This worldwide kingdom.
127 provinces from India to Ethiopia.
That's not enough.
He has 10 children.
That's not enough.
Everyone bows down to him pretty much everywhere he goes.
That's not enough.
He has great riches and power and fame.
But he said, this is literally what he says in the book of Esther.
He said, but it all avails me nothing.
As long as I see Mordecai in the gate.
Not bowing down to me.
I mean what kind of a bizarre thing.
Where he's got all this wealth and riches.
And he's a braggart.
You know how people are where they just brag about all the stuff that they have.
And they tell you how much money they have.
And he's bragging to his friends.
Hey look how many kids I have.
Look how nice my house is.
Look how nice my wife is.
Look at all the power.
Look at the fame.
Look at the ring on my finger.
And he says, but none of it avails me anything.
As long as I see Mordecai in the gate.
Not bowing down to me.
That just kind of monomania.
Just fixating upon one thing.
But I see that over and over again in the Bible.
Where people just focus on one thing.
Look at King Ahab.
He's the king.
He's got all this power.
He has all this land.
All this wealth.
What does he want?
Naboth's vineyard.
For a garden of herbs.
And you know what?
This guy, men aren't usually that into gardening.
And the thing is, a lot of men are into gardening.
There's nothing wrong with gardening.
But here's the thing though.
I bet you that Ahab would have started that garden.
And probably just moved on to something else eventually.
I mean I'm just not convinced that he was just going to do that garden.
Just religiously for decades.
No it's probably just a little phase that he's going through.
A little gardening phase.
You know where he wants to buy that garden of herbs and do a little gardening.
You know I went through a gardening phase when I was a kid.
But it passed a long time ago.
You know?
So it's just one of these things where we forget about all the good stuff that we have.
I mean this guy's the king's son.
And you know what?
He probably could have gotten a lot of women probably just lining up to marry him.
I mean when you're the king's son.
You know the Bible always talks about David was such a good looking guy.
Well you know he probably inherited some of those looks.
Right?
If he's David's son.
Not only that but you know I'm sure David's wives are all beautiful.
So he's probably a good looking guy.
He's the king's son for crying out loud.
He's got all kinds of wealth and fame and power, prestige.
You know he probably could have had all kinds of women.
And he wants to marry his half sister.
What an idiot.
The whole world is there.
To hold all the choices.
But this is how people are.
They want that which is forbidden.
And it's wicked.
We need to stop and think about all the good things we've been blessed with.
All the things that God has given us access to.
And not sit and worry about the things that we can't have.
Now God's rules.
You know what the Bible says?
This is the love of God that we keep his commandments.
And his commandments are not grievous.
God's commandments are not grievous.
They're not bad commandments.
God's not just trying to restrict you to where you just live a terrible life and it's boring.
I mean God doesn't want us to be Catholics and live in a monastery and beat ourselves.
And you know pray the rosary five million times and rub beads with our fingers until they start bleeding.
You know down to the bone and crawl on our knees through broken glass and all this stuff.
You know what?
God actually tells us many times that he wants to enjoy life.
Now he does command us also to suffer for the Lord Jesus Christ when need be.
But God doesn't expect us to be these ascetics who live in monasteries.
And God isn't just commanding us no fun allowed.
No pleasure allowed.
No joy allowed.
You know you need to suffer every day.
All the time.
Wipe that smile off your face.
You.
But the thing is.
The thing is.
That's how people sometimes act about God.
Like ah these rules ah these do's and don'ts.
It's really not that restrictive.
There's really a lot that you can still do.
And it's so funny when you talk to people.
You know these reporters will come and talk to us.
You know and they want to like look at us like we're a specimen from a zoo or something.
Like you know conservative Christian in his natural habitat.
And they want to like and they come and they're just like.
So you know what do you guys do.
I mean there's no TV like what do you guys do all day.
Oh you know we all we just we stare at the wall where the TV would be.
And just think about spiritual things.
I mean what do you think people did.
What do you think people did before TV.
And I remember when I was when I was a teenager I used to watch a lot of TV.
And I remember sitting and thinking as a teenager.
I remember thinking like what did people do before they had TV.
And I just I just pictured people like sitting in their living room with like a candle and a book.
And that's just like they just read a book by candlelight.
Because I mean if you don't have a TV I mean that's what you do.
You read a book by candle.
But you know what's interesting is that when you get rid of the TV.
You find there's a whole world of things to do.
Besides TV.
You know and there's and you end up not even missing it.
Because people didn't have it for thousands of years.
You don't need TV to live and just like oh I gotta watch TV.
In fact if you get away from it for a while.
Then it's it seems weird to even watch TV.
Nineteen yeah nineteen fifties.
So yeah it's been around for sixty years or whatever.
So everybody just feels like oh I gotta have TV.
It's a necessity.
It's like they're they're lifeline.
You know keeping them alive or something.
And I've literally been in a hotel room with the guy that I worked with.
And he basically you know had the TV on.
I said hey you mind if we just turn the TV off.
And just talk.
It's like okay you know.
Because I don't want to watch TV you know.
So he turned off the TV.
And then and then he would just like three or four minutes would go by.
He'd turn it back on.
And he wasn't trying to be rude or defiant or anything like that.
It was just that it was just like a knee jerk.
And I'm like hey didn't we agree we're gonna have TV.
Oh yeah yeah sorry.
You know a couple minutes later.
You know it's like what are you doing.
It was just like he just couldn't stop.
Just turn on the TV.
Turn on the TV.
So it's not that God.
And people are just like oh your kids.
I mean you know what about your kids.
I mean don't they wish that they could watch TV.
And don't they wish that they could play more video games.
And go to the movies and do all this.
But it's like there are so many fun things that my kids do.
But they act like my kids are just like deprived.
Of having any fun in life.
I mean my kids are playing outside.
They're doing all.
They're actually reading books.
They like reading books.
They go swimming.
They go running.
They ride bicycles.
They go to PE.
They play.
They do all kinds of make believe.
And all kinds of fun things.
And they don't even miss it.
Okay.
But people today just want to focus on that which is wrong.
Or for example.
You know God sits there and tells you.
Of all the trees of the garden now may us freely eat.
You know as a man you have all the.
If you're a single man.
You have all these women to choose from to get married.
You know the whole world there is there.
Just you know as long as somebody's saved.
You know we have all these women to choose from.
There's like what you know.
8 billion people in the world.
And half of them are women.
You know but it's.
But basically it's like.
No I want to marry another man.
I mean what kind of a sick perverted.
Filthy world that we live in.
And but now obviously no normal person wants to marry another man.
You have to be given over to a reprobate mind.
According to Romans 1.
But the thing about that is.
That it's just so bizarre that then the world will turn around and look at us.
And say like.
Oh you guys are just so strict.
I mean you guys are just so restrict.
It's like okay.
Why would anybody even want to do that.
There's all these women.
Or you know you got the whole world and it's.
Oh I just love my half sister.
What in the world is wrong with you.
There's so many fish in the sea.
Of all the trees of the garden now may us freely eat.
Just pick one.
Don't.
But we just fixate.
As as human beings.
On things that we can't have.
And just focus on that one thing that we get.
Or just one thing about your life that isn't perfect.
Let's say you have a great marriage.
And you have.
You know great health.
And you have a great church.
But your finances are shot.
Your financing.
But you don't have any money.
So.
So what.
Some people would pay all their money just to have good health and a good marriage.
Just be content with such things you have.
But we have a tendency to just focus on the one part of our life.
That is not going right.
Just this tunnel vision.
Just this monomania.
Just fixating on that one thing.
Mordecai.
Or that one tree that we're not supposed to eat of.
Or that one person.
You know.
Look.
The Bible tells you.
Not to marry a woman that is divorced.
The Bible says.
Whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.
That's what the Bible says.
The Bible tells you.
You know.
Be not unequally yoked together with unbelievers.
It's like when Sampson.
You know.
Has all the women of Dan.
That he could marry.
He's got.
He's living in the nation.
And his parents are trying to show him.
Look at all these women Sampson.
Look at all the daughters of your people.
No.
I want to go marry the Philistine girl.
You know.
It's just this.
This fixating.
Upon that which is off limits.
And it's a wicked mentality.
We need to make sure.
That number one.
We're thankful for all the good things that God has given us.
And number two.
That we do not lust after evil things.
As they also lusted.
And that we would keep ourselves.
You know.
Within the bounds of what God has provided for us.
And what God wants us to have in our lives.
So he kicks her out.
You know.
Bolt the door after her.
Throws her out.
No respect for her.
I mean this guy.
Is a piece of trash.
As far as I'm concerned.
This story enrages me.
Every time I read it.
But let's see what happens.
It says in verse 19.
And Tamar put ashes on her head and rent her garment of divers colors that was on her.
Rent means she tore it.
So basically she tore these special clothes that she wore as a virgin.
It says for with such robes were the kings daughters that were virgins appareled.
Then his servant brought her out and bolted the door after her.
Verse 19.
And Tamar put ashes on her head.
Rent her garment of divers colors that was on her.
And laid her hand on her head and went on crying.
And Absalom her brother said unto her.
Hath Amnon thy brother been with thee?
But hold now thy peace my sister.
He's saying you know I don't want to make you talk about it.
Because he understands what happened.
So he says hold now thy peace my sister.
He's thy brother.
Regard not this thing.
So Tamar remained desolate in her brother Absalom's house.
But you know I wonder if men even think about the lives they're destroying when they go out of sleep around.
And when they're in junior high and high school and in college sowing their wild oats.
I wonder if they know the lives that they're destroying in the process when they do that.
But it says in verse number 21.
But when King David heard of all these things he was very wroth.
And Absalom spake unto his brother Amnon neither good nor bad.
For Absalom hated Amnon because he had forced his sister Tamar.
Now David here he's angry.
He has great wrath but he doesn't do anything about it.
There's no punishment meted out.
This is a crime.
This is something that needed to be punished under Moses law.
And even under our law in the United States this would be a crime.
And this is something that needs to be punished.
David hears about it he's wroth but he doesn't do anything about it.
And you wonder why didn't David do anything about it.
Well I think part of the reason why David didn't do anything about it.
Is because David just got through committing a wicked sin himself.
And you know when you're guilty of wicked sin.
You know you don't really judge other people because those who live in glass houses right.
Don't want to throw stones.
And so it's a bad situation when the ruler is in wicked sin himself.
Because then he goes soft on on judgment soft on sin.
Because he's wicked himself.
That's why God never goes soft on sin because God has no sin.
So he's a very stern judge.
You know it's only of the Lord's mercies that we're not consumed.
You know through the Lord Jesus Christ we have forgiveness of sins.
But God's wrath is a consuming fire.
But the Bible says here that in verse 23 it came to pass after two full years.
So Absalom doesn't say anything to Amnon good or bad.
And he's just stewing in anger for two years.
Just for two years he's just you know just just like a time bomb waiting to go off.
And it says in verse number 23 that Absalom had sheep shearers and Baal Hazor which is beside Ephraim.
And Absalom invited all the king's sons.
And Absalom came to the king and said behold now thy servant has sheep shearers.
Let the king I beseech thee and his servants go with thy servant.
And the king said to Absalom nay my son let us not all now go lest we be chargeable unto thee.
And he pressed him how be it he would not go but blessed him.
Then said Absalom if not I pray thee let my brother Amnon go with us.
And the king said unto him why should he go with thee.
But Absalom pressed him and he let Amnon and the king's sons go with him.
Now Absalom had commanded his servants saying mark ye now when Amnon's heart is merry with wine.
And when I say unto you smite Amnon then kill him.
Fear not have not I commanded you be courageous and be valiant.
And the servants of Absalom did unto Amnon as Absalom commanded.
Then all the king's sons arose and every man got up upon his mule and fled.
And it came to pass while they were in the way that the tidings came to David saying
Absalom has slain all the king's sons there's not one of them left.
Now this is a really exaggerated version of the story.
So basically Absalom only wanted to kill one person.
Amnon. He wanted Amnon executed because of the fact that he had raped his sister Tamar.
He was infuriated by that and he wanted to see justice carried out.
Now I do not believe that Absalom was wrong to want to see justice carried out.
Because that was the proper justice under the Mosaic law.
But the problem is that David is failing to lead and failing to rule his own home.
First of all he raised a child like Amnon that would do such a thing.
And then he's letting his son Amnon hang around with guys like Jonadab.
And then when this horrible crime takes place he will not punish and he spares.
But not only does he spare him death he doesn't punish him at all.
He doesn't do anything. I mean there's no punishment carried out.
So that just causes Absalom to become enraged to take things into his own hands and to kill Amnon.
Now what you have to understand is that life in the land of Israel was different than it is today under our law in the United States.
In the United States obviously it is not legal for us to take the law into our own hands.
You know this would be called vigilantism.
So it's not right if I see somebody who has committed a crime, let's say murder or whatever, rape, whatever.
It's not right under American law for us to go out and execute that person and just do it ourselves.
Because in America the law says that they have to get a trial and go through the process and the jury and yada yada yada.
But you have to understand that in the Old Testament the law was different.
And there is actually an aspect of vigilantism that was allowed under the Mosaic law.
If you actually study the Mosaic law you'll see that if somebody is a murderer for example, you know it says that the avenger of blood shall slay him as soon as he meeteth him.
Now the only time they would have a trial would be if there was some question as to the guilt or innocence.
If there was some question as to whether the crime really took place then they would have the judges and they would have a trial and they would investigate and so on and so forth.
But if it was just a clear cut, everybody knows, then basically the avenger of blood would just slay that person. It was that simple.
And if they were brought to the judges then the witnesses would be the first ones to cast a stone and then everybody else would cast a stone as well or whatever.
But there was an element of vigilantism in the sense that it was perfectly legal if someone committed one of these crimes for someone to just execute judgment.
The avenger of blood would do it. And that's just anybody. Somebody kills your brother or whatever, you have the right to go avenge that punishment.
Somebody is committing adultery or whatever, it was just carried out by the people. That's how the law reads when you study the books of Moses.
But the Bible teaches of course that now we're supposed to obey the laws of the land that we live in.
Obviously for example in Romans 13 where it explains that the government is supposed to be a revenger of wrath.
It says he's supposed to be a revenger to execute wrath upon him that doeth evil. So in the Old Testament the revenger was just whoever.
Whereas in the New Testament God says we're supposed to obey the laws of the land and allow them to be the revenger.
So it's not our job to just go out and just carry out vigilante justice. We're going to get that registered sex offender list and we're going to find all these pedophiles and rapists and we're going to put them all six feet under where they belong.
That's not something that God wants us to do. That's not our job as New Testament Christians. But we do believe that that's what the government should be doing.
The government should be putting pedophiles and rapists to death. But it's not our job to be that revenger. That's not our place in America.
But back then you have to understand because you might say oh well Absalom here is acting out as a vigilante. But here's the thing though.
If you study the Mosaic law that was not illegal to be a vigilante because that was something that was part of the system back then.
Now if you went out and wrongfully slayed someone that didn't deserve it then you're going to be killed then if there's a trial and so forth.
That was kind of the check and balance on that situation. So therefore we see Absalom here carrying out justice on Amnon.
I don't think you can look at Absalom here and say oh he's a wicked person. He's doing these wicked things.
I think it's just a natural reaction when your sister is attacked and defiled in this wicked way.
Now there's a similar story in the book of Genesis where a brother takes revenge.
But the difference in that story is that I believe that if you study that story carefully the act with Dinah.
We're talking about with Dinah and Simeon and Levi. The act with Dinah I believe was a consensual act.
It was not a situation of her being forced, number one.
And number two, the difference with that story is that they did not just kill the guilty party. They killed the whole town.
And I mean that was a horrible thing for Simeon and Levi to do.
And as a punishment God said that their tribes would be scattered in Israel.
That's why the tribe of Simeon that used to be located within the tribe of Judah.
If you ever look at a map of the 12 tribes, Simeon is like a little island.
It's like what's that country in Africa that's like that, Lesotho or something?
The one that's like within and it's like Guadalupe is like within Tempe you know.
But anyway that Simeon was within Judah but eventually they get scattered all over.
And they didn't have a place in Israel where their tribe was. They just got kind of scattered throughout the tribe.
And then of course Levi was spread throughout the tribes because of the fact that they were the priests.
And they were put in all different places throughout the nation.
So God was angry at Simeon and Levi for what they did.
But here we don't really see that exact same thing.
We don't see God weighing in and telling us that Absalom did a wicked thing at this point.
Because I don't think that at this point he has necessarily done wrong.
And you know they're exaggerating and saying he killed all the king's son.
No the only person who was put to death was the rapist. That's the only one.
Now after this in the subsequent chapters Absalom is going to go into sin.
Because he's going to begin to rebel against his father and he's going to do all kinds of other sinful acts.
But I'm just saying at this point you know I don't think that he was just a horrible person.
I think Absalom started out as a good guy but because of the fact that judgment was not being carried out.
Because of the hypocrisy that he's seeing in his family it caused him to go astray.
And you know what we can learn from this story too?
Is that we as leaders need to be a good example unto our followers or else we can actually cause our followers to go into sin.
Because I think that it's clearly David that was to blame for Absalom's sin here.
Number one God already predicted that David would pay four fold for the man that he murdered Uriah.
And four of his children are killed.
And Amnon and Absalom are two of those four.
Okay so that shows that it's a result of what he did.
But secondly if he would have been consistent and executed judgment.
And if he would have you know kept himself pure and not coveted another man's wife.
Then you know this wouldn't have happened.
And so therefore you know whether we be parents or pastors or whatever leadership position we're in.
We need to make sure that we are not offending the little ones and driving people into a sinful lifestyle.
It doesn't excuse the things that Absalom is going to do later.
But what started him on this path?
Two years of hatred.
Two years of that bitterness inside of him.
And you know bitterness and hatred in your heart and anger that just rests in your bosom for two years.
Is going to lead you into all kinds of sinful things.
And that's what it does in the life of Absalom.
Because he ends up just lashing out at everybody taking it out on everybody.
And thinking to himself you know my dad's not even fit to rule.
You know and rebelling against his father.
Creating a civil war.
All kinds of bloodshed associated with that.
And all the other things we'll get into in the following chapters.
But it says in verse number 31.
Then the king arose. This is when the king just thinks that all of his sons are dead.
That's the news report he gets.
You know it reminds me of when 9-11 happened.
And my dad called me on the phone.
Because I didn't have a TV.
My dad called me on the phone and told me.
He's like Stephen you got to come over.
He said planes are crashing all over the United States.
He said planes are crashing into buildings everywhere.
Our country is under attack.
Planes are going down everywhere.
I mean this is the end you know.
And I'm like oh man you know.
Hop in the car. Drive over to his house.
My wife and I are like oh man this is intense.
You know we get there it's like oh it's just these you know.
Just the twin towers or whatever.
I mean it's bad but you know.
At least planes aren't just crashing all over the United States into buildings.
Major cities all over America he said.
Major cities planes are slamming into buildings.
I'm like woah man.
So that's sometimes how the early reports are of things.
So he hears that.
He tears his garments.
Verse 31.
And lay on the earth and all his servants stood by with their clothes rent.
Look do you just see how much sorrow and misery sin causes?
All this goes back to David bored one night.
Looking out the window.
Sees a woman taking a bath.
And you know wants to lie with her.
And that one moment of pleasure.
That one night of fun leads to a lifetime of suffering.
And all these people suffering.
It causes Tamar to suffer.
Amnon suffers.
Absalom suffers.
The servants suffer.
People die.
Why?
Because sin was finished bringing forth death.
And you need to think about that before delving into sin.
Think about how much pain and suffering and misery and sorrow comes from sin.
It's not worth it.
The way of transgressors is hard.
It's not worth it.
Pleasure for a moment.
Pain for a lifetime.
Is it really worth it?
Keep thyself pure the Bible says.
You know live a godly life.
Sin will always you know take you further than you want to go.
It'll keep you longer than you want to stay.
And it'll cost you more than you're willing to pay.
But let's keep reading the story here.
It says in verse number 32.
And Jonadab the son of Shemaiah, David's brother, answered and said.
And remember this is the guy who caused this by advising Amnon.
Let not my lord suppose that they have slain all the young men the king's sons.
For Amnon only is dead.
For by the appointment of Absalom this has been determined from the day that he forced his sister Tamar.
Now therefore let not my lord the king take this thing to heart to think that all the king's sons are dead.
For Amnon only is dead.
You know Jonadab is a lot like Satan in the sense that number one he's very subtle.
Number two he tempts someone to commit a horrible sin right.
And basically leads them into sin.
And then he turns around and is the accuser now.
Oh yeah you know Amnon yeah he forced his sister Tamar.
You know of course he doesn't say it was my idea.
But he just throws Amnon under the bus there.
And says oh yeah he forced the sister Tamar.
So he represents Satan in the story.
It says in verse number 33.
Therefore let not my lord the king take this thing to heart to think that all the king's sons are dead.
For Amnon only is dead.
But Absalom fled and the young man that kept the watch lifted up his eyes and looked.
And behold there came much people by the way of the hillside behind him.
And Jonadab said unto the king.
Behold the king's sons come as thy servant said.
So it is.
I mean this guy's just tooting his own horn.
See I told you everything's fine.
Everything's great.
And it came to pass as soon as he had made an end of speaking.
Behold the king's sons came and lifted up their voices and wept.
And the king also and all his servants wept very sore.
But Absalom fled and went to Talmai the son of Amahud king of Gishur.
And David mourned for his son every day.
So Absalom fled and went to Gishur and was there three years.
And the soul of king David longed to go forth unto Absalom.
For he was comforted concerning Amnon seeing he was dead.
You know it's interesting about that how he gets over the death of his son Amnon.
He's able to deal with that.
He says you know he's comforted concerning the death of his son Amnon.
But even three years later he's still longing for his son Absalom.
You know it shows how sometimes a rift in the family that estranges people can sometimes be worse than death.
It can be harder to deal with than death.
I mean he has an easier time dealing with a son that's dead than the son that is estranged from him.
The son that is hateful to him and rebelled against him.
And you know when people get divorced I've often heard it said it's worse than a death.
It's worse than their spouse dying.
Because of just the pain and the emotional conflict that it causes.
You know people need to think about that.
First of all you need to think before you get married.
And make sure that you're marrying somebody that you want to spend the rest of your life with.
And that you're willing to be with in sickness and in health and poverty as in wealth.
And forsaking all others keep the only end of them so long as you both shall live.
I mean you need to think that through and not just flippantly.
Yeah sure let's get married.
With in the back of your mind.
Well you know if it doesn't work out.
I've always got plan B.
You know that's a wicked philosophy.
You need to take a real long and hard look at who you're marrying.
And decide you know is this who I want to spend the rest of my life with.
It's a big decision.
Okay but then once you make that decision you need to stay with it through thick and thin.
And not cause that sorrow and pain and upheaval of the sin of divorce.
The Bible says the Lord God of Israel hateth putting away.
Putting away means divorce.
God hates divorce.
So we see here just the pain and the suffering of a rift in the family.
And sometimes the most painful wounds in our life come from family hurting us.
Or problems in the family.
Or a schism in the family.
Whether it's between a parent and a child.
Or between husband and wife.
Or whatever the case may be.
It can cause a lot of pain and suffering and hurt in our lives.
So what's the moral of the story?
The moral of the story is to resist temptation.
To not commit these type of sins that can destroy not only your life but the lives of your children.
And the lives of all the people around you.
You've got to withstand that temptation and not yield to it.
And also it tells us that we need to be strict with carrying out punishment.
We can't just look a blind eye to horrible sins going on.
And just allow everybody to rape and fornicate.
And just turn a blind eye to it.
Because you know what it does?
It disillusions the people who are living right.
The Absaloms of this world who are actually living right.
They get disillusioned when they see people doing horrific wicked things and just getting away with it.
And it disillusions the person who's actually trying to live right.
And so we need to carry out justice.
And the Bible says judgment must begin at the house of God.
Of course now we have a bunch of churches that say,
Don't judge.
Judge not.
Just keep repeating that over and over again.
Not getting the context.
Not getting the full teaching of the New Testament.
That's saying, you know, don't judge as a hypocrite.
Don't judge by the appearance.
Don't judge, you know, that which is outside of your realm to judge.
They just take it as just judge not.
Period.
Judge not.
And they just repeat that over and over again.
But the Bible says judgment must begin at the house of God.
For what have I to do to judge them also that are without?
Do not ye judge them that are within?
But them that are without, God judgeth.
Therefore put away from among yourselves that wicked person.
But we have this attitude of just, oh man, just don't judge anybody.
And it's so crazy now that even just the most wicked sins is just like don't judge.
I mean, God's saying, you got this fornicator in the church.
You got to throw him out of the church.
What are you doing?
That's what 1 Corinthians 5, the whole chapter is about that.
A lot of pastors don't even know that chapter exists.
I don't know if their Bible just goes straight from 4 to 6 or what.
But it's just, you know, and it's funny.
They love to hang out over in 1 Corinthians 6, 9 through 11.
But then it's like 1 Corinthians 5 just doesn't exist to them.
You know what I mean?
It's like, hello.
Read the chapter.
What's it say?
And I hear them say, everybody's welcome.
Everybody's welcome in church.
It's a spiritual hospital.
Was the hospital going to turn away sick people?
Everybody's welcome.
No, they're not.
That's not what the Bible says.
And we need to get back to the Bible.
Look, do we want unsaved people to come to church?
Look, that's not our primary goal with church, no.
You know what?
Well, how are they going to get saved?
Well, in your church, they never would.
Because don't go soul winning.
But you know how they get saved here?
Because we go out and win them to the Lord.
Because the Bible says, go ye therefore into all the world.
It didn't say bring in the whole world into your church and teach them.
Is that what it said?
Bring all the world.
Bring all nations into your church.
Bring every creature into your church.
Is that what the Bible said?
That's a big church.
You're going to bring in every creature?
No, he said go preach it to every creature.
And he said he that goeth forth and weepeth, bearing precious seed, shall doubtless come
again with rejoicing, bringing his sheaves with him.
And what's the sheaf?
The sheaf is the finished, bundled, harvested product.
That's the sheaf.
He didn't say bring in the seeds.
Bringing in the seeds.
We shall come rejoicing, bringing in the seeds.
No, he said bring in the sheaves.
Because of the fact that the sheaves are what has already been harvested.
Meaning that which has been saved.
So the purpose of church is for the saved.
It's for the edification of the body of Christ.
It's to build up the saints.
Now, do unsaved people come to church some?
Sure.
Are they welcome to show up and visit?
Absolutely, of course.
And when they show up, we'll take them aside, we'll give them the gospel, we're happy to
see them, whatever.
But here's the thing.
The goal is not to fill the church with unsaved people.
The goal is to have a church filled with saved, born again, baptized believers.
And it's funny because every Baptist has got this in their doctrinal statement somewhere.
You know, the church is the born again, baptized believers.
You know, they have it all like nailed down in some statement of faith somewhere.
We believe that the church is a local assembly of born again, baptized believers.
But then it's like, we've got to bring in the world, you know, get them saved, bring
in the unsaved.
It's like, what?
I thought it was born again, baptized believers.
I thought that's what the assembly is.
But it's like, no, just bring everybody in, you know.
And then they're just like, just bring in queers, bring in pedophiles.
What?
There's too many kids around to bring in a bunch of filthy pedophiles.
You know, but oh, just bring, well, what, don't you want them saved?
You know, first of all, they're reprobate.
But second of all, second of all, why would you have to bring, even if you didn't believe
that they're reprobate, why would you have to bring someone to church to get them saved,
when you could go out and get them saved?
Okay, so it's just wrong on so many levels today, this idea of just, yeah, just bring
in the transvestites, bring in the pedophiles, bring in, I mean, look, God had the kings
in Israel break down the houses of the Sodomites just because they were next door to the house
of God, let alone, you know, let alone be in the house of God.
He said the ones that live next door are to be broken down.
Okay, so, you know, there's just a lot of goofy doctrine out there today.
And because of all this weird goofball doctrine, you know what we see in these liberal kumbaya
type churches is that the young people, as soon as they turn 18, they're gone.
It's so true.
In the kumbaya, you know, cold hell, good sin, you know, good devil, you know,
those type of churches, it's just the young people are gone.
And people say, oh, we've got to reach the young people.
If we bring in the rock and roll, we'll reach the young.
But here's what happens, though.
They just go to the real rock concert since they're 18.
Instead of your, like, B-grade rock concert, they go to the real rock concert, you know.
And this is what we see, this watering down of everything, it doesn't reach the young people.
And you say, oh, you know, we've got to go liberal to reach the young people.
Well, look around, you see a church full of young people.
Our church is filled with young people.
I mean, our church is filled with people that are in primarily the age group of our churches
is people in their 20s.
I know.
Yeah, you notice?
I mean, that's the main demographic.
But supposedly you can't reach people in their teens and 20s with this kind of preaching.
But yet, here we have a bunch of young people that are responsive to it.
Why?
Because young people want something that's real.
You know, they want something that's legit, and they don't want hypocrisy and fake religion.
And this movement of the new evangelical movement claims to be reaching the young, but it's a failure.
It's a flop.
We see more and more.
Just look at the statistics.
The young are leaving these churches by the droves.
And these kids are growing up in this permissive kind of Christianity, and they turn 18 and
they're out the door.
They're gone.
And God forbid that it would be that way in our church, that everybody just turns 18 and
says, see ya, instead of staying with it.
So we don't want to have a bunch of absolums in our church.
But you know what?
Before you get too hard on an Absalom, what creates an Absalom is a guy who does what
David did.
You know, it's sin in the upper echelons.
It's the parents that are hypocrites that raise up the Absaloms of this world.
And so we need to just make sure that we are not being a hypocrite and that we live by
that which we teach and preach so that our children can have a consistent role model
to look to because, you know, we're going to bring forth after our own kind.
And unfortunately, David, he brought forth after his own kind, in a sense, because he
brought forth one that lusted after someone that was off limits and acted upon that.
Let's bow our heads and have a word of prayer.
Father, we thank you so much for this great story in the Bible, Lord.
Even though it's a story that makes us angry and it's a sad story, but Lord, help us to
learn from the warning because it's so much better to read the story and take heed than
to have to go through the pain and suffering ourselves, Lord.
Help us to just learn from the story and realize, hey, you know, don't ever commit fornication.
Don't lust after those that are off limits and help us, Lord, to just every man have
his own wife and every woman to have her own husband, Lord, and to avoid fornication, adultery
and these types of sins.
And in Jesus' name we pray.
Amen.