Welcome to Faith for the Baptist Church.
Would you please find our seats and open up our nimlose of song number 68.
We begin our Sunday with a service-busting song number 68.
No matter who you are, no matter who you are, no matter who you are,
you should never be left with a partner.
Come on, sing it out with us.
Come on, sing it.
Brother Faith, could you pray for us.
Blessed be thy name Lord, thank you for your precious word Lord and this church.
Thank you for this time to sing to you and worship you Lord and hear your word.
Pray this blessed service Lord in Jesus name. Amen.
If you could turn your hymn into song number 3.
Sing the song number 3, Jesus we love.
to say, keep watchful by your soul.
And now we'll be back, my love, back now and evermore.
We'll change the leper's claws and help the heart to move.
Keep the trade open, all to him, my love.
Sing and let the princes sing.
Keep watchful by your soul.
For nothing could ever die.
And I, my mercy play, shall wash my heart's wine.
And the blood of man is good.
Jesus, be come, all to him, my Lord.
Sing and let the princes sing.
Keep watchful by your soul.
And when you go the door, I stand in memory.
Jesus, guide my soul to say, I live just like you.
Jesus, be come, all to him, my Lord.
Sing and let the princes sing.
Keep watchful by your soul.
And I, my mercy play, shall wash my heart's wine.
All right, well, it's great to see Rhi out tonight.
If you'd like a bulletin, go ahead and step up your hands
and we'll be brought to you.
As always, the service times are there
in the upper left-hand side.
We'll be back this Thursday at 7
to continue our journey through the book of Genesis.
We'll be in chapter number 16 this week.
We've got some soul-winning times listed below there,
as well as some other statistics.
And don't forget, over on the right-hand side,
that all ladies are invited to join
in our annual Mother's Day Tea Party.
That's gonna be on Saturday, May 11th.
I'll have a few more details in the upcoming bulletins
as we get closer to that date.
But if you are planning to attend as a lady,
if you could maybe express that to my wife's,
because typically what I think we get is a Panera.
Panera and then also edible arrangements.
And we wanna order as much as necessary.
Okay, but we don't wanna order too much,
because that's not cheap, the edible arrangements.
It's very good.
So I wanna make sure we can get a fairly accurate count
of how many people are gonna be coming.
So anyway, that's really all we have
in terms of announcements this week.
Well, let's go ahead and just count up the soul-winning
going back to Friday,
if anybody has anything to report from Friday,
or from Saturday and Sunday today, is it two?
Anything outside of the group today?
All right, well, that will do it for announcements.
We'll go ahead and sing one more song
before we get into preaching tonight.
Please open up your song books
to song number 138.
["Singing Out of My Church"]
the wife do benevolence, likewise also the wife
unto the husband, the wife hath not power of her own body
but the husband, likewise also the husband
hath not power of her own body but the wife.
For I be not one the other,
except be one with consent for a time,
that ye may give yourselves to the fast of the prayer,
and come together, that Satan teth not,
teth ye not from your own constancy,
that I sleep despite permission, not of commandment,
for I would that all men were even as I myself,
that every man had the proper gift of God,
one after this matter, and another after that.
I say this one to the unmarried and widows,
it is good for them if they abide in his love,
but if they cannot contain, let them marry,
for it is marriage of marriage that is to burn,
and unto them marry, let them marry,
and get out of it, O Lord,
that not the wife depart from her husband,
but if she depart, let her remain unmarried,
or be reconciled to her husband,
and that not the husband, but the wife's wife,
but to the rest be God, not the Lord,
any brother of the wife, that believeth not,
if she be pleased to dwell upon him,
let him not put her away,
and the wife, which hath found the husband,
that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell upon him,
let her not leave him,
for the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife,
the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband,
elsewhere your children uncle,
but now are they holy,
but if the unbelieving depart, let them depart,
brother or sister is not in a bond in such cases,
but God has called us to peace,
for what knowest thou, O wife,
whether thou shalt save thy husband,
or how knowest thou, O man,
whether thou shalt save thy wife,
lest God distribute his every man
as the Lord hath called every one,
so let him walk, and so ordain I in all churches,
is any man called being circumcised,
and not become uncircumcised,
and then he call him uncircumcision,
and not be circumcised,
circumcision is nothing, uncircumcision is nothing,
but the keeping of the commandments of God,
that every man abide in the same calling
where he was called,
are thou called being a servant,
care not forth, but as thou mayest be gave free,
use it rather, for he that is called
in the Lord being a servant,
is the Lord's premium,
likewise also, he that is called,
being free, is Christ's.
Ye are followed to Christ,
ye not the servants of men,
rather, that every man where he is called,
there abide with God,
that concerning virgins,
I have no command of the Lord,
yet I give my judgment,
as one I have to obtain mercy of the Lord to be faithful,
I suppose therefore,
that this is good for the present distress,
I say, that this is good for a man certain be,
art thou bound to a wife,
seek not to be loose,
art thou loose from a wife,
seek not a wife,
but, and if thou marry,
thou hast not sinned,
and if her virgin marry,
she hath not sinned,
nevertheless,
she shall have trouble in the flesh,
but I spare you,
but this I say, brother,
that the time is short,
and remaineth,
that both they that have wise,
be as though they had none,
and they that weep,
as though they weep not,
and they that rejoice,
as though they rejoice not,
and they that buy,
as though they possess not,
and they that use this world,
as I would use you,
for the fashion of this world passes away,
but I would have you without carefulness,
he that is unmarried,
caring for the things that belong to the Lord,
having been pleased with the Lord,
for he that is married,
cares for the things that are of the world,
how he may please his wife,
there is difference also between wife and virgin,
the unmarried woman cares for the things of the Lord,
that she may be the holy,
both the body and the spirit,
for she that is married,
cares for the things of the world,
how she may please her husband,
and this I speak for your own profit,
not that I may cast a snare upon you,
for that which is coming,
and that you may attend them to pardon the Lord
without distraction,
but if any man think that he behave himself
of the coming towards his virgin,
if she pass the flower of her age,
and he so require her to do what he will,
he sin is not, but the married,
nevertheless, he that standeth steadfast in his heart,
having known necessity,
that hath power over his own will,
and that so decreed in his heart,
that he who keep his virgin doeth well,
so that he that giveth her a marriage doeth well,
and he that giveth her not a marriage doeth better,
the wife is bound by the wall,
as long as her husband liveth,
but if her husband be dead,
she has the liberty to be married,
who she will, only in the Lord,
but she is happier if she so abide,
and I think also that I have the Spirit of God,
without any papers.
Lord, heavenly Father,
just take it to your goodness and mercy, Lord God.
Just thank you for all you do for us, Lord.
We acknowledge you today, Lord God,
and just thank you for everything you do, Lord God.
Thank you for your word,
and thank you for the preaching, Lord God.
I say the blessed thinking with your Holy Spirit.
Just give us a heart of understanding your word.
In Jesus' old name we pray, amen.
Amen.
So in 1 Corinthians 7,
Paul really is just addressing this whole thing about
whether it's better to be married or unmarried,
and really, he kinda makes a case for both, right?
He's kinda saying there's pros and cons to each,
and obviously, towards the latter half there,
he's kinda giving, makes it pretty clear
that he's kinda just giving his opinion there,
and Paul's opinion is that it's actually better
to be unmarried, and that he is in favor of that
as he says he would that all others were as he were,
being unwed, that they would remain unmarried.
That's what he says to the widows,
and I think that's an interesting case that he makes there,
and I think it's something we should definitely
give some consideration,
and especially because I feel like sometimes,
I myself have preached, and perhaps others,
have maybe been a little disparaging
of people that are single.
Sometimes people might be given the impression that
if you're single, that somehow you're second class,
and you need to just focus on being married,
and that you must just be loathing your existence
as a single person.
I don't know that I've necessarily done that,
but sometimes I feel like I wanna correct course
a little bit, I don't wanna be taken the wrong way,
because I have preached that it is important,
I believe, for most people to find a spouse
and to be married, but that isn't something
that should be done out of a desperation,
and people who maybe are taking their time
and finding that spouse certainly should not
be looked down upon, they should not be undervalued
in their service to God, and that's why I wanna preach
a sermon tonight about serving God as a single,
because our focus in this life is to serve God,
at least it oughta be.
Whatever state we're in, whether we're married
or unmarried, we should seek to serve God,
to love the Lord our God with all our strength,
soul, heart, mind, all our might.
We should make that the primary thing in our life.
That should be our number one goal in life,
is to serve God, and if that is our goal,
to serve God, what we're gonna find is that
there's pros and cons to being single,
there's pros and cons to being married,
that marriage actually, when it comes to serving God,
in some ways can be a hindrance.
I don't wanna be disparaging of married people either.
I myself am married, and for me,
it's certainly the preferable state to be in, okay?
But let me just start out by saying here,
in 1 Corinthians 7, I don't wanna go over
the whole chapter, but we're gonna start in verse 24,
where Paul starts to give his judgment or his opinion.
He says in verse 24, let every man wherein he is called
abide with God, and he talks about
if you're called being a servant, think nothing of it.
You're the Lord's free man.
If you're called being unmarried, remain unmarried.
If you're called being married,
if you're called that you're bound to wife,
seek not to be loosed, okay?
So he's saying don't be discontent
in the station of life that you're in.
We shouldn't always have this mentality
that somehow the grass is always greener on the other side
and always think that if we could just change
this one aspect of our life,
that somehow it's just gonna make everything better
and all of our problems are just gonna evaporate
and life is just gonna be a primrose path
all the way to heaven.
Every circumstance that we find ourselves in life
has its pros and cons.
And I think that's what Paul
is really trying to get across here,
and he's making a pretty good case
as an unmarried man for remaining unmarried,
if your goal is to serve God to the utmost, okay?
But again, it's just his opinion, all right?
And people can have a contrary opinion to Paul,
there's nothing wrong with that.
But as he says here in verse 25,
he says now concerning virgins,
which meaning those that he's assuming,
younger, unmarried, people who have not been widowed
or divorced, people who are yet to marry,
he's saying I have no commandment of the Lord,
yet I give my judgment.
He's saying if you're a virgin, if you're unmarried,
there's not a commandment from God that says
you must remain single, right?
Because he's kind of making that case.
He's saying in my opinion, Paul,
as I'm speaking as if I were Paul,
it is better to remain unmarried, right?
But he's saying but that's not a commandment
that I have of the Lord.
He's being very careful to say I'm giving my judgment,
I'm giving my opinion, right?
As one that obtaineth mercy of the Lord.
So Paul is giving his opinion here,
and we shouldn't just write Paul off, right?
Obviously Paul, his opinion carries a lot of weight, okay?
And this right here is a lesson in and of itself,
that we ought to give heed to people
who are speaking from experience
and knowledge and wisdom, which Paul is, okay?
People who are speaking from experience,
whether it's firsthand experience or otherwise.
You know, especially someone like Paul who is a minister,
right, he's somebody that's preaching the word of God,
he's ministering to people,
he's been in lots of different churches,
he's spent time in lots of different churches,
he's counseled with people,
he's dealt with a lot of different situations.
Obviously he's seen a lot of things,
he understands a lot, he's gained a lot of experience.
You know, he's somebody that we would definitely
want to give an ear to, right?
I mean, the guy who authored the vast majority
of the New Testament is probably someone
when he gives his opinion,
we should probably take his opinion into consideration
and it should carry some weight with us, okay?
The Bible says, and I'll just read to us from Hebrews 13,
remember them which have the rule over you
who have spoken unto you the word of God
whose faith follow considering the end
of their conversation.
You know, this is something I try to be mindful to do
when I hear somebody, you know,
giving their opinion or speaking or teaching,
you know, maybe they're speaking or teaching something
that is contrary to what I have taught
or something that I might believe.
A lot of times, sometimes I'll just say,
well, you know, this person has more experience
in this area than I do.
This person has more time, you know, in the word of God.
They understand the word of God better than I do.
You know, maybe they have firsthand experience
in some area.
You know, if they are teaching something
that's contrary to what I believe,
I don't just instantly write that person off,
you know, especially when that's somebody
who has spoken unto me the word of God.
You know, I wanna follow their faith.
I consider the end of their conversation, right?
And a lot of times that's a good way
to kind of determine who you're gonna listen to
and who you're not.
You wanna look at how their life is going, right?
You know, you wanna have a good marriage,
you should probably listen to the guy
who has a good marriage.
You wanna raise godly, happy, healthy children,
you should probably listen to the guy that's doing that.
Right, you don't wanna listen to the guy that,
you know, about marriage whose marriage is failing,
or you know, or has a failed marriage.
And the irony is, you know,
people who have failed in these areas
are often the ones who are most readily
wanting to give advice, rather.
So, you know, those who are raising children
as an example, right, should probably listen to those
who have raised children, okay?
And this is something I'm mindful about.
You know, I know I'm raising children,
but I have yet to begun to raise teenagers, right?
And you know, several people have warned me,
like, oh, just wait.
You know, but I've also noticed that people
who are successful in raising teenagers
haven't had that same dreadful, you know, premonition.
You know, they haven't, you know,
expressed that to me, oh, just you wait.
There's also other people who have raised teenagers
that don't have that feeling, okay?
So, but either way, I'm gonna listen to people
that have raised teenagers.
You know, obviously I'm gonna weigh what they're saying,
and I'm also gonna consider the end of the conversation
because, you know, I'm not somebody
that has gone through that, you know?
I would probably be more inclined to listen to somebody
who has children that are dating, you know,
and listen to what they have to say about it,
and maybe change my opinions or what I believe about that,
and be willing to adapt, right?
And I'm saying all that as an example
of somebody who is expressing their opinion, right?
Because often, people get up behind pulpits,
and they just express what they believe, their opinion.
We ought to give weight to that, okay?
Because that's what Paul's doing this.
We ought to give that, you know, it's due,
you know, ought to give it merit.
It has weight, okay?
And I say that because some people might write Paul off
because here he is telling us about marriage
as an unmarried man.
Well, it's like, well, who are you to talk, buddy?
Like, you've only seen one side, right?
But here's the thing.
Paul is somebody, though unmarried,
who has never experienced marriage,
has dealt a lot with somebody who's married,
with married people, rather, right?
He's dealt with these situations.
He's got the Lord's mind on this.
You know, Paul knows what he's talking about.
Let's not write him off here.
So that's all kind of introduction there,
to make sure that we're gonna listen
to what Paul has to say, you know, in good faith here.
So it says in verse 25, he says,
I have no command of the Lord, yet I give my judgment.
So Paul is giving his judgment on what is best for who?
For those that are unmarried, for the unwed, okay?
And yes, he's doing it as a married man,
but let's not forget he is also the apostle Paul.
He says in verse 26, I suppose, therefore,
that it is good for this present distress, I say,
that it is good for a man to so be, right?
And he's saying this to the unwed,
to the virgin, right, to those who are not married.
He's saying it's good.
He says it twice in that one verse.
It is good.
It is good for a man so to be.
Now, he does state that it's, you know,
for this present distress, meaning given these certain,
you know, these current circumstances,
it's better to be unmarried, in his opinion, okay?
People could take that different ways.
Maybe he's referring to some persecution
that's befalling them in Corinth, I don't really know.
Or it could just be that he's referring to
the trial of life in general,
that if our focus here is to serve God,
if our focus in this life is to earn heavenly rewards
in heaven to, as Jesus said,
to set our affection upon things above
and not on things on the earth,
to lay up for ourselves treasures in heaven,
Paul is saying, you know, then it's probably better
that you remain unwed, that you remain unmarried, okay?
And he goes on and gives us some reasons
as to why that is.
Now, I'm not gonna get up here and say
that that is the case.
You know, I think that, you know,
every person has to decide that for themselves.
You know, what's the best situation for them, okay?
And probably for the vast majority of people,
it's to get married, okay?
But, you know, on the same token, you know,
I don't want people to overreact to a statement like that
and get this mentality that somehow
that being unmarried or single is something to dread, right?
Oh, I'm never gonna get married.
And they just get very depressed about this.
Or it's something to despair over, right?
Maybe marriage is something that has become off limits,
right, as I preached this morning.
And need I say more?
You know, if you've been married and divorced,
the Bible, you know, condemns being remarried as adultery,
right, and so maybe you wanna honor God in that
and that's kind of off limits to you,
that's not a reason to start despairing.
And just to think, well, life's over,
what's the point, life's meaningless.
You know, Paul is making a case here
that actually, as a single person,
you can get a lot done for God, okay?
And obviously, that takes faith,
it takes a genuine, sincere spirituality
to see the value in that,
but that is the case that Paul makes here, okay?
And I'm kind of preaching this
to kind of come to the defense maybe
of single people a little bit
and to encourage them and to not, you know,
dread or despair the fact that they are married
and perhaps may remain that way
for whatever reason for some time.
Being single is not something to dread or despair over.
Being married or unmarried,
each has its own pros and cons, okay?
I know all the married guys don't want to say amen to that.
But anyway, verse 27,
art thou bound unto a wife?
Seek not to be loosed.
Art thou loosed from a wife?
Seek not a wife.
He's saying, you know,
whatever state you're found in, that remain.
Verse 28, but and if thou marry, thou hast not sinned.
He's saying, look, this is just my opinion,
it's not a commandment of God
for you to remain that way, to remain unmarried.
And if a virgin marries, she hath not sinned.
Nevertheless, such shall have trouble
in the flesh.
Now that's an interesting statement
because most people think the opposite.
Most people think, oh, if I remain unmarried,
I'm gonna have trouble in the flesh.
Paul's saying, actually, if you have married,
if you are married,
that's when you're gonna have trouble in the flesh,
right?
He says, but I spare you.
And that's an interesting statement
because some people will say,
well, you know, I need to get remarried
or I need to get married
because, you know, I have this burning lust,
like I have to, you know,
have some kind of outlet
for these feelings
and these desire for physical intimacy, right?
Which obviously is a very compelling reason
to get married, okay?
However, it's not an excuse to sin.
You can't take that and say,
well, you know, because I have this burning lust,
you know, I'm gonna go ahead
and as a divorced person marry somebody else
because it's better to marry than to burn.
Okay, the two wrongs do not make a right.
And there's nothing noble about that, okay?
Look, as I said this morning,
every single person married or unmarried
is gonna have to deal with the flesh.
That lust, that desire doesn't just disappear
when you get married, okay?
You can still sin as a married person, all right?
And obviously I understand that those needs,
again, are more easily satisfied in marriage, okay?
I get that.
But it's not, all I'm getting at is
it's not an excuse to go ahead and get married
when you're divorced, okay?
And I'm pointing that out
because Paul's saying like, look, those that get married,
they're gonna have trouble in the flesh.
It's a different kind of trouble,
but it's trouble nonetheless, isn't it?
It's still, there's still struggles.
It's not like life suddenly is just so much easier
because you got married.
It comes with its own host of problems, okay?
They have trouble in the flesh
when they're married just as much as the unmarried.
And Paul's gonna explain here a little bit more.
He says in verse 29, but this I say,
the time is short.
It remaineth that both they that have wives
be as though that they had none,
and they that weep as though they wept not.
Okay, so again, our focus as Christians
is always serving the Lord, okay?
I think that's really what is coming across
in this chapter that no matter what state you're in,
you know, we should always examine our situation in life
and make our decisions based upon service to God, okay?
And really what he's saying here in this chapter
is that if that's our focus, being unwed,
you know, lends itself more to serving God
than being married, okay?
At least that's what I get out of it.
He says in verse 31, and they that use this world
is not as abusing it, for the fashion of this world
passeth away, but I would have thee without carefulness.
He that is unmarried careth for the things
that belong to the Lord, how he may please the Lord, okay?
At least that's the way it ought to be, okay?
If our focus is serving God because the time is short,
right, he's saying that the unmarried
cares for the things that belong to the Lord.
You know, sometimes I think the struggles
that people have when they're single
is because they're focused too much
on the fact that they're single.
If you just sit around dwelling on the fact
that you're not married and that you might never be married
or marriage has been taken off the table for you,
obviously that's gonna be a miserable way
to go through life, isn't it?
Just dwelling on that, right?
And I get it, like being married is important.
If you're somebody that you've never been married,
obviously that's something you wanna see happen,
but it doesn't mean that in the meantime
you just have to go around moping
and feeling sorry for yourself.
And we that are married should never disparage
or look down upon people that are,
for whatever reason, unmarried, okay?
They actually, according to Paul here,
have a greater opportunity to serve God
than those of us that are married, okay?
And maybe the married people don't like hearing that,
but you know, that's kinda what I'm getting out of this, right?
He that is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord,
how he may please the Lord.
Verse 33, but he that is married
cared for the things that are of the world,
how he may please his wife, right?
Cause that's part of marriage, you know, marriage,
there's more to marriage than you just getting to,
you know, have an outlet for your physical needs, okay?
You know, and it's kinda concerning to me sometimes
when people, like that's all they're thinking
they're gonna get out of marriage.
It's like you do realize the person you're marrying
is a person, right?
That person, you know, isn't just a means to an end, okay?
That they're a person with feelings and thoughts
and dreams and hopes, all that stuff
that comes along with being a person, right?
And they also have a personality.
And they also have likes and dislikes and preferences
and you know, there's baggage that comes along
with being, I don't know how else to say it,
you know, there's things that come along
with being married.
You have to learn how to get along
and everything else, okay?
And he's saying, he that is married
careth for the things that are of the world.
You know, if you get married,
your focus goes from, you know, from the Lord
to the things of this world,
like paying the bills, right?
You know, it's, you know, you don't see a lot of photos
of these missions trips that our churches,
you know, our church and like churches take.
When you look through those photos,
you know one thing you don't see a lot of?
A lot of young kids.
Now they are there, but the, you know,
it's interesting how many, you know,
single people you see on these trips.
You know, when they're going to Africa or Jamaica
or wherever, you know, Miami, Florida,
like they're people that are just flying
all over the world and visiting all these exotic places
and winning souls to Christ by the hundreds.
Yeah, even the thousands.
You know, they come back and see all the photos.
You don't see a lot of young children.
Now you say, well, I see married people.
Yeah, but their kids are at home.
Their kids are back in the States, right?
That's why they're smiling.
That's why they're just like,
it's been years, we're on a vacation.
I don't mean to bash the kids,
you'll understand, okay, one day, right?
Don't take that the wrong way, children, right?
But sometimes the parents gotta get away, okay?
But, you know, why is that?
Why is it that you don't see, you know,
a lot of large families just, you know,
going to all these places?
Because it's not practical.
A lot of times it's not even financially feasible.
Sometimes you have to be,
I don't want to say more responsible, you know,
there's nothing irresponsible about going on a missions trip
but it's just not available to you.
That's kind of off limits in some instances.
You know, you have to put a lot of planning.
You gotta find somebody to watch the kids
and the ones, if you're not gonna take them,
you're gonna have to take time off of work.
You're gonna have to make sure
that you got all the bills paid.
When you're a single person, you know,
a lot of times your expenses are pretty low
and you can kind of just, on a whim, you know,
buy a plane ticket and fly around the world
and join in and serve God.
You know, I mean, even just, you know,
busy wives and mothers trying to get out once a week
to go soul winning.
That's a real struggle.
That's very difficult sometimes.
They have to really focus like, okay, you know,
are all the kids well enough?
You know, will my husband take them
off my hands for an hour?
Does he have anything on their scheduling conflicts, right?
There's a lot that goes into it.
You have to care about the things of this world
as a married person, okay?
So it's not the end all be all of existence
to be a married person, okay?
And there's nothing wrong with being single.
It's not something that should be dreaded.
It's not something that you should despair over.
Being married, you can get a lot done for the Lord.
And you say, well, you know,
I just don't find that very satisfying.
Well, you know, maybe the problem is a heart issue.
Maybe you should do a little more soul searching then.
You know, maybe you should adjust your priorities, okay?
If that's just so unappealing to somebody.
I mean, think about that.
What if you said that to somebody,
hey, you know, at least as a single person,
you can get a lot done for God.
You can go serve God.
You can win a lot of souls.
You could read a lot.
You could read your Bible a whole lot more.
You have quiet time to read your Bible.
You could pray.
You could memorize scripture.
You could have fellowship with other single young people.
I mean, you could do so much.
And then that person's just kinda like,
yeah, I know, but whatever.
And just kinda complain about that.
It's like you're taking that for granted.
You know, and one, it's like if you're not married
simply because you haven't found the right person
to marry yet, you know, I promise you,
you're gonna look back on these single years.
If you just waste them, you're gonna regret that.
You're gonna look back and go,
man, I could have done a lot more for God
as a single person back then, okay?
If you develop any spirituality at least,
that's probably how you'll end up feeling about it.
You know, the unmarried, they can serve God
to a degree that the married cannot.
And that's what Paul is saying here.
Verse 34, there is a difference also
between a wife and a virgin.
The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord,
that she may be holy both in body and in spirit,
but she that is married careth for the things
of the world, how she may please her husband.
So it goes both ways.
Husbands and wives, they have to be concerned
with the things of this world
to keep their spouse happy
because they're in turn taking care of one another.
The husband has to pay bills,
he has to keep a roof over everyone's head,
he has to put food on the table, he has to provide.
A wife, especially when there's young children
and instruction taking place and training
and rearing up, I mean, it's a lot
that will take your focus off of the things of God
and put it on the things of this world,
this current life, this present situation, okay?
And look, Paul is somebody who chose
to forgo marriage to minister more effectively.
Go to 1 Corinthians chapter number nine.
Don't get this idea that Paul
was some kind of eunuch or something.
Or he was just, he could not be matched
on whatever dating app with someone, okay, right?
It's not like he just didn't have
the compatibility with somebody on,
I can't even remember, was it eHarmony back in the day?
And the 100 points of compatibility.
Is that still a thing?
Yeah.
I said, whoa, that came way too quick.
I'm just kidding, I'm playing, right?
Match.com, all these dating sites or whatever
where they're gonna match you up with somebody
based on your 100 points of compatibility
or whatever it is, right?
It's not, you tried it, okay?
Well, hey, I did too, all right?
Okay, so did my wife, right?
And the answer was just a few blocks away, literally.
We grew up down the street from her,
we didn't even know it.
But God eventually got, he was the harmonious one.
He was the one who did the matching for us, right?
He caused our paths to cross.
But it's not like Paul's been trying
and just failing, right?
Oh, Paul's just so cantankerous or something,
he can't find a woman to marry him.
Paul chose to not be married, okay?
He chose to forgo marriage to minister more effectively.
Look at 1 Corinthians chapter nine, verse five.
He said, and this is what he's referring to
about ministers being paid, right?
And he's saying, have we not power
to lead about a sister,
a sister meaning a woman in the Lord, right?
Just like we call one another brethren,
you know, another saved woman is my sister, right?
Spiritually speaking, that's what he's saying there.
Have we not power to lead about a sister,
a wife, as well as other apostles?
And as brethren of the Lord and Cephas,
he's like, other people are getting married,
but you know, Barnabas and I have forgone that
so that we can get more done.
And wouldn't you know it?
Who's the guy that seems to have gotten more done
in the New Testament during that time than anybody else?
Paul.
Who was it that took the gospel into the world,
and who is it that we have to thank for Christianity
spreading like the wildfire that it did in Paul's day?
We have Paul to thank for that.
And how was Paul able to accomplish that?
Well, one factor, it seems like,
that he's pointing out is that I, you know,
I chose not to lead about a wife, a sister.
You know, I wanna be able to travel light, right?
And when you start having good night,
if you have kids just trying to get out the door,
you should see all the stuff that has to get packed.
Like, we're going to church.
It's like, yeah, but we need this bag and this bag
and this bag and this cart and da-da-da-da-da.
They need their toys and this sandwich.
It can be overwhelming, okay?
Imagine being Paul trying to do all that on foot,
you know, and travel around the world
and go on his missionary journeys
and preach in all these different places.
He understood that, hey,
if I'm gonna get something big done for God,
I'm just gonna have to forego marriage.
And you know what?
I'm sure Paul had his lonely moments.
I'm sure there were some nights
when the lights turned off and the doors were closed
that he kind of, you know, felt bad for himself
or felt alone in this world.
Maybe not, I don't know.
He got a lot done for God, didn't he?
I mean, Paul went without marriage
and he accomplished a great deal as a result.
He was able to minister more effectively as a single man.
So again, I'm trying to make the case tonight
that there's worse fates in life than being single.
And sometimes people just get this mentality
that unless they get married,
that life's not worth living, okay?
And look, I'm trying to put this as delicately as I can
because I don't want to have anything thrown at me
when I get home, okay?
Marriage is great, okay?
Don't get me wrong, right?
You all know my wife, she would never throw anything.
She always holds onto the pan and swings.
But, you know, I'm just kidding, right?
And I'm also trying not to, you know,
underplay marriage.
Marriage is a wonderful relationship.
It's great, you know?
But here's the thing, we're not Mormons here.
It ends in this life.
They're neither given in marriage,
they are not taken or given in marriage in heaven,
but are as the angels.
There is no giving in marriage in heaven.
It ends in this life.
We are heirs together of the grace of life, okay?
We're not Mormons where all you ladies
get to look forward to going to heaven
and being, you know, sealed under your husband
and then just perpetually give birth for all of eternity.
How that's heaven, I don't know, okay?
That's what they teach.
It's very bizarre, but that's what Mormons teach, okay?
And all I'm saying is, like,
it's a wonderful relationship.
It's a God-ordained institution.
It has its merit, it has great value.
We need married people, obviously,
where we would cease to exist, okay?
I'm pro, I'm on that team, okay?
Pro-marriage.
But, you know, it's also a relationship
that's gonna end, it's not the end-all,
be-all of existence.
And I'm not, you know,
I don't make my life all about my marriage.
You know, this is something you don't wanna get into
in life, is where you just make your life
all about one thing.
I'm just all about being a minister.
I'm just, you know, I'm just totally focused on that.
I'm just all about, you know,
just being the best husband that I can.
I'm just obsessed with my wife.
I'm just all about being a father.
You know, it's like, it's good to kind of
have different irons in the fire, as it were.
You know, everything should be given,
it's, you know, due place, and no more.
Look, I love being married.
I wouldn't change anything, you know?
I love it, it's great.
I've been both, you know, I've been unmarried and married.
I choose marriage, obviously, right?
But you know what, if for some reason,
I were to lose my wife suddenly,
like, my life would not be over.
Sorry, honey, you know?
It wouldn't, my life would go on.
And I don't know that I'd marry again.
I don't know.
Perhaps I would, I can't really say.
But I can say this, is that, you know,
I know that there's more to life
than just being married.
And I'm just saying that because I think sometimes
some people just get this mentality
that they just have to be married,
and they can't be happy until they're married.
You know, I don't know how much your spouse
is really gonna appreciate that.
All my happiness depends on you, honey.
Without you, I'm gonna be a miserable,
no pressure, though, okay?
You know, don't, that'd be a little too much,
don't you think?
Hey, my happiness and well-being
is just completely dependent upon my spouse.
It's like, no, you know,
there's more to life than being married, okay?
And Paul chose to forego it
so that he could minister more effectively for God.
Look at verse 36.
Let's move along here through the chapter.
He says in verse 36,
if any man thinketh he behaveth himself
uncumbly toward his virgin,
if she pass the flower of her age,
and need so require, let him do what he will,
he sinneth not, let them marry.
There's nothing wrong with giving
your daughter in marriage, you know,
once she's mature enough to have that relationship, right?
It's not something you have to keep your children from.
This is Paul's opinion, okay?
Verse 37, nevertheless, he that standeth steadfast
in his heart, having no necessity,
but hath power of his own will,
and hast so decreed in his heart
that he will keep his virgin doeth well.
There's nothing wrong with a guy
who just determines, I'm just gonna remain virgin,
I'm not gonna get married,
I have power of my own will,
he does well too.
There's nothing wrong with remaining single
or being a single person, okay?
Paul says it's preferable in his opinion.
And look, obviously, you know,
Paul is saying that this is a gift
that is given to men.
This is not something that most people can handle,
being single, I get it.
It's not the ideal situation for most people.
But here's the thing,
most everybody is gonna spend some portion
of their adult years as a single person, okay?
Not everyone, it's not like you're gonna turn 18
and all of a sudden, bam, you're married, right?
It's not gonna be that quick.
Like, look, great if it works out that way.
I think there's a lot of benefit to that,
to being married young, if you're mature enough
and you have the blessing of your parents
and you've met the right person, you've been dating,
you know who you're getting involved with, like, great.
That's wonderful when it works out that way.
But you know, a lot of times that's not the situation.
You know, a lot of times people have to go
several years before finding somebody that's right, okay?
And during those years, you know,
people should not be disparaged over that, you know?
And people should not despair over that.
And they shouldn't feel like their single years
are somehow useless or something.
Look, those are some of the most powerful
and effective years you could have for God.
You could do such great things,
things that you might never have opportunity to do again
in those years.
Use them for God.
Don't just mope about,
don't just sit there and feel sorry for yourself.
Do something with that time.
Let me say this also.
You know, older people who have no prospects of marriage
for whatever reason, either they just don't want to
or it's something that's being taken off the table
you know, because of past mistakes,
those people should not feel useless.
Like, oh, well you know, I'm just older,
I'm not married, that never happened for me
or it's just something that's not,
it's taken off the table for me.
That doesn't mean you're a lesser Christian.
It doesn't mean you have less value.
It doesn't mean that you're useless.
You could use your remaining years
to do great things for God.
How do I know that?
Because Moses did his greatest works
after he turned 80, right?
And he served God in a powerful and mighty way.
Now, let me say, let's not all wait till we're 80
and to start really serving God.
Let's go ahead and serve God, you know,
well before our 80th birthday, okay?
But you know, sometimes people that get saved
later in life, you know, perhaps they're unmarried,
they've been divorced, whatever it is,
and they're, you know, let's just face it,
towards the latter end of their life, okay?
That, why at that point would you just throw
your hands up and just say, well, you know,
it's all over, what's the point?
You know, and just despair.
You could do your greatest works.
You know, you could get on fire for God.
You could do great things for God.
You could throw yourself into serving the Lord
and you could get more done in the last 20 years
of your life than some people will ever get done
in their entire life for God.
You know, the vast majority of Christians,
you know, you could be a very rarified heir
as an older person if you just threw yourself
into a whole hog serving God.
Even if you're, you know, you're later on in years,
it'd be, it's entirely possible.
So Paul has given us his opinion, okay?
And so I'm kind of giving my opinion as well tonight.
My judgment, my experience, what I've learned
is that, and let me just tell you where I'm coming from.
I am somebody who spent almost their entire 20s
as a single person, okay?
So some of you younger guys, I feel your pain.
I know what it's like, okay?
But I also during that time was in church
three times a week.
I was active in the ministry and I was,
I wasn't some super great Christian, you know,
but I endeavored to serve God as best I could
during those years in my 20s.
I didn't just lay around and feel sorry for myself
and think that, you know, life's pointless
until I get married.
You know, I spent most of my time,
most of my 20s rather, not, you know, single.
And look, let me say, I don't think that's the ideal.
I don't think that's something you should strive for,
but if that's the case for some people, so what?
So what?
What's the big deal?
You know, is it really gonna hurt?
I mean, take advantage of that time.
You could sit there and feel sorry for yourself,
or you could work on improving yourself,
bettering yourself as a person, serving God.
Take advantage of that time that you have.
You know, because as soon as, you know,
a spouse and children come along,
a lot of that free time you have is gone, okay?
And perhaps never to return right now.
And until you're older, right, then you get it back,
hopefully you've kept yourself a good enough health
to have life after children, okay?
But anyway, again, I'm not saying that's the ideal,
but I'm saying, don't, my judgment is this.
If you're single and you're in your 20s, it's okay.
It's all right.
You know, at this point in my life,
I've spent the vast majority of my adult years married.
I was unmarried, you know, from 18 to 28.
29, 28, okay, whatever it is, about 11 years, all right?
It's been long enough that it's all getting foggy, okay?
And I've been married for 14, I think 14, 14 years?
Okay, good, all right, I pay attention, right?
See, 14 years.
You know, and honestly, I was talking about my wife
this afternoon, and I wonder if I should even bring it up,
but I will.
What we were discussing, like, you know,
what if I were widowed?
You know, like, in the immediate future.
You know, I was thinking, you know,
I think at this point, I would just remain unmarried.
You know, I've, and I'm, she's like,
it just doesn't sound good, like, right?
But I'm saying, it's like, I've had that.
I've had that wonderful relationship with somebody
that I love and care about very much.
You know, and I have children, you know.
I would probably, at this point, you know,
just elect to remain unmarried, you know?
I've got a nice, juicy life insurance policy.
How you feeling, anyway, feeling all right?
Okay, right, you know, so I could stay at home
and just teach the, you know, I could take over
the duties of raising the children,
make some memories with them.
The kids are like, no, no, definitely not, right?
The cooking would probably need some work, right?
I'd probably have to make some improvements there,
you know, but I, you know, I would do that,
and then, you know, by the time I raised my children
as a widower, you know, I would probably be,
what my youngest is three, so at least 15 years, right?
So 15 years from now, I would be 58, almost 60 years old.
To me, at 60, I'm just kind of like,
I would just kind of think like, what's the point?
Like, why go, especially if I were gonna marry
a younger woman, you know, let's say I married someone
who was still in her child-bearing years
as a 60-year-old man.
Like, I love kids, folks, but not that much.
Like, I'm gonna start that whole cycle over at 60,
newborn, I'm like, I'll be dead and gone
by the time they're 20, like, you know what I mean?
Like, I'm gonna do all that again?
I don't know, maybe I would, I don't know,
but to me, just, I'm thinking it through,
thinking I would just probably, at this point,
stay unmarried, make the best of it,
and you know what, I would enjoy my life.
I would enjoy my life, you know?
I would endeavor to do other things.
I would, you know, spend time with my kids
and teach them and raise them and, you know, make memories
and I would probably be very happy that way.
You know, I probably wouldn't,
I wouldn't sit there in despair.
My wife says, she's like, I give you a week.
She's like, I give you about one week, right?
To which I countered, how about a month?
February, 28 days, okay, so, right?
I look, obviously, I can't say for sure, right?
And it's silly to kind of be hypothetical about that,
but I'm just trying to make the point that, you know,
there's more to life than marriage.
It's not the end of your existence
if you're not married.
You can still do great things for God.
And there's more nobility in you struggling
to stay right with God in the flesh
and serve him as a single person
than there is going out and as a divorced person
getting remarried to somebody
just so you can, you know, not have to deal
with that temptation or whatever.
There's no nobility in that.
Does everyone follow what I'm saying?
Like, God understands that in our flesh
we have sin and struggle.
When he sees us struggling against the flesh
and dealing with the temptations that we have to deal with,
there's grace.
My grace is sufficient for thee.
I will never leave thee nor forsake thee.
Oh, I'm all alone, I have nobody else in this world.
I will never leave thee nor forsake thee.
So that we may boldly say, the Lord is my helper.
You know, when you're in temptations,
when you're going through trials,
that's when it's a great opportunity
for God to show up and see you through.
And then you can boldly say, the Lord is my helper.
You know, when you're going through those struggles
as a single person dealing with temptations and sins,
you know, draw nigh to God
and he will draw nigh to you.
It's a great opportunity to have fellowship with the Lord,
to know that his presence is near.
Because he comforts us in all our tribulations.
You know, and there's something,
there's a virtue in a single person
trying to get victory over the flesh
and stay true to God.
Okay, there's virtue in that.
And having that struggle.
And look, you're gonna stumble.
But you know what, a just man falls seven times
and he rises up again.
You know, God is always there to lift them up
and put them back on the right path once again.
You know, that's a struggle, there's virtue in that.
But just throwing in a towel and making a sinful decision,
there's no virtue in that.
And there's no justifying it, okay?
Let's wrap up the chapter here.
It says in verse 38,
so then he that giveth her in marriage doeth well,
but he that giveth her not in marriage doeth better.
The wife is not bound by the law
as long as her husband liveth,
but if her husband be dead,
she is at liberty to be married to whom she will,
only in the Lord.
But she is happier if she so abide after my judgment.
He's saying, you know what, the widower and the widow,
who's, you know, maybe later on in years,
if their spouse has died,
the court, you know, in my opinion,
they'd be happier, they'd be better off
to just remain that way.
And I think also that I have the Spirit of God.
He's like, you know, I think I'm somebody
that knows what they're talking about,
that I have discernment on these issues,
and he's giving us his opinion,
and we should definitely let it carry the weight
that it has because it is the apostle Paul.
And I think he makes a very strong case
that at the very least, you know,
marriage, while preferable, you know,
is not the end all be all of your struggles.
It's not the solution to all your problems.
It comes with its own host of problems.
It comes with its own struggles.
And one of the disadvantages of being married
is that you cannot serve God as you would
as a married person, as an unmarried person.
Okay?
It's just a fact, okay?
That's not to say you can't get something done for God.
Right?
And look, you know, the unmarried person,
when their life ends, their service to God is over.
You know, I'm raising up the next generation.
You know, I'm, you know,
the children of the youth are as arrows
on the hand of a mighty man.
I'm sending, you know, I'm investing in Christianity
for generations to come, okay?
Obviously, my reach will extend beyond my life
because I'm raising children
in the nurture and admission of the Lord.
But in the here and now, in this present distress,
the fact is is that a single person
could probably get as much done
as several generations of married people.
You know, that's just kind of how I see it.
And let's not forget that, you know,
marriage, while I believe the preferable
and probably the ideal circumstance for most people,
can be the lesser of the two options, okay?
I'll remind us of Proverbs, right?
It is better to dwell in a corner of a housetop
than with a brawling woman in a wide house.
You know, hence the man cave, right?
That's what that's really about, right?
Hence the, you know, the rec room above the garage,
you know, in the attic, right?
Where he's gotta get away and locks the door.
So you get away from a brawling woman.
You know, it'd be better to not marry
than to marry the wrong person.
It's true, you know, marrying the wrong person
can make your life a living hell, right?
It's true, that's what the Bible's,
and he says that twice in Proverbs,
19 or 21 and 25, that's repeated.
It'd be better to dwell in the corner of a housetop
than in a wide house with a brawling woman, okay?
And I guess what I'm trying to say,
you married or unmarried people is it could be worse.
You could be married to somebody that you hate
and despise and you're just constantly
at each other's throat.
Oh, that's not out there.
Oh, yes it is.
It definitely happens, okay?
There's worse fates in life than being single, okay?
And I don't say that, you know,
in just a whimsical way.
You know, I mean that, right?
There's virtue in being single.
It's not something to be to be despaired over.
And we should definitely never disparage people
who are single or think that they're somehow,
you know, second class or something,
second class Christians.
They have an opportunity to use their single years
to do great things for God, to do that.
Now, you know, it's on them whether or not
they're gonna do that.
It's on them whether or not
they'll use those years in that way.
You know, sometimes I think guys get this attitude
of like, well, I'm like Paul.
And it's like the only way you're like Paul
is that you're single.
That's the only thing,
that's the only similarity we have with Paul, right?
If you're like Paul, then be like Paul
in more than one way,
in more than just the fact that you're single, okay?
The divorcee could say the same thing.
I'm like Paul, you know?
You're single, okay?
Well, Paul also served the Lord fervently
as a single person.
So if you're gonna say I'm like Paul,
then you know what, be like Paul.
Use your single years to serve God fervently
and get some things done for God.
You could do great things.
Let's go ahead and close in a word of prayer.
Dear Lord, again, thank you for all the people
in our church that have endeavored
to serve you with their lives,
both married and unmarried, young and old.
Lord, those that love you in sincerity and truth,
I pray you'd help us all to see
the great opportunity that is set before every one of us
to serve you in a great way
and to be able to honor you and glorify you
through our actions for all of eternity.
We pray that you would bless us as we go.
In Jesus' name, amen.
All right, we'll go ahead and sing one more song
before we go.
If you could please open up your song,
what's the song, the one from your 20-hour book,
The One From Your 20-hour Book,
or the Simon Song, or one from your 20-hour book,
Prejudice, or I'll play a song from your 20-hour book,
using your notes
and your O' drain of your voice,
then give us alaughter took some light.
So, what was it, which was call first?
t boosts first t
Let me, let me I myself be. Let the water ramble on.
Come what may be, this I will show. Be of sin or love will do.
Take the breath and make me do. Put my tears up and flow.
Put my sin or love will show. With the Savior I am told.
Now the Savior I will hold. With my hand I will pass the wind.
Simply do, I trust in what my God has given breath.
When my eyes shall close to heaven. When I rise to the world alone.
Let me hold you on the throne. Rock away this black wind.
Let me I myself be.