Amen, so the title of the sermon tonight is dating and divorce, dating and divorce.
It says there in Mark chapter 10 verse 1, and he arose from thence and cometh unto the
coast of Judea by the father's side of Jordan.
And the people resort unto him again, and as he was want, he taught them again, and
the Pharisees came to him and asked him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife tempting
him?
And he answered and said unto them, What did Moses command you?
They said, Moses suffered to write a bill of divorcement and to put her away.
And Jesus answered and said unto them, For the hardness of your heart he wrote you this
precept, but from the beginning of the creation of God made he them male and female.
And this isn't going to be a very popular sermon, and you know, I'm not just saying
it's definitely going to be unpopular with the world, no doubt about it.
You know, the world today has just embraced divorce as something that's almost as, you
know, commonplace as marriage.
In fact, you know, most marriages today in this country end in divorce, and I really
don't want to go on like on and on about that.
But you know, that's to be expected.
You know, when you're talking about a lost world that doesn't have Christ, that is just
going through and trying to live life and make the best of things as they can without
Christ, without the Bible, without the instruction from God's word.
You know, it's no surprise that marriages end that way, and it's no surprise that a
sermon like this would be, you know, rejected wholesale by the world, okay?
But not as only is this sermon probably going to be very unpopular with most of the world
today, but it'll be even be very unpopular amongst, you know, many churches today, many
Christians today.
There's plenty of churches out there that you can go to that will tell you that, you
know, being divorced, there's nothing wrong with getting a divorce, that there's nothing
wrong with being married after getting a divorce.
You know, there are a dime a dozen, okay?
And here's the thing about that, that's not our stance, okay?
The Bible, and I don't have to really get complicated in the sermon tonight.
I don't feel like I have to turn to a lot of passages to make it, you know, crystal
clear what the Bible teaches about this topic.
And what we believe on this topic has never really been, you know, something that we've
shied away from or something we haven't preached from the rooftops in our churches, you know,
Tempe and even down here, I've preached sermons about it.
People know what we believe if you come here long enough, and we believe what the Bible
says that if a person gets divorced and then gets remarried, they are committing adultery.
That's the plain teaching of scripture.
And again, it's very unpopular today.
And let me just start out by saying, you know, if that's you, if you're somebody who has
gotten divorced, you know, I'm not mad at you.
I'm not up here to try and embarrass anybody.
I'm not trying to make anybody an enemy, but I'm not going to just sit idly by when
divorced people are contemplating getting married and just be silent about it.
You know, especially, and I'm especially going to preach it when, you know, they don't want
to come talk to me about it.
Okay.
That's when I'm definitely going to pipe up.
So because here's the thing, if I just sit by and just don't say anything, then everybody
else in this church thinks, oh, well, Brother Corbin must be okay with it.
Let me just tell you right now, this isn't faithful word light.
Okay.
It's Tucson down here.
We're not just, oh, I know that's the way it is in Tempe.
I know Pastor Anderson draws a hard line on it.
Look, I draw just as hard a line on it as he does because that's what the Bible teaches
and I'm not going to back down on it, you know, and I'm somebody who's experienced firsthand
the devastating effects of divorce and I've preached a whole sermon on that, entitled
that.
And I, you know, and if you're, you know, even contemplating divorce, you should probably
go listen to it because the stats are astounding, you know, and I know firsthand what it's like
when people get divorced, just the devastation that is brought into the lives of not only
the parents, but the children.
So I get worked up about it.
Okay.
And here's the thing, if you're divorced, I'm not angry at you for having a divorce.
You made that mistake, whatever you need to live your life.
And if you're divorced and have already gotten remarried, you know, what's done is done.
Go ahead and live your life.
I'm not mad at you either, you know, because there's these crazy doctrines out there today
where people are even teaching, oh, if you're divorced and got remarried, to be right with
God, you have to leave that second spouse and go back to your original.
You know, I'm not going to take the time to explain all that, but the Bible actually specifically
condemns that, that if a man takes a wife and sends her away, divorces her, and she
goes on to another man, she cannot then leave that next husband and go back to the original.
The Bible calls that uncleanness.
Okay.
But what I'm preaching tonight is the fact that, you know, if you're divorced, you have
no business dating.
Dating and divorce.
You have no business as a divorced person dating anyone.
Because what is the purpose of dating somebody?
It's to see whether or not you should get married.
I mean, that's what we believe here.
That if you're dating someone, it's to see, hey, can I get along with this person?
What this person's like?
What are their values?
Can I spend my life with this person?
What do they think about children, raising children?
You know, you discuss all these things hopefully during that dating process.
You know, that's some dating advice to people who haven't made that mistake yet.
If you're dating, you know, you need to work out those issues before you, you know, say
I do.
And say, well, I didn't know all this about him or her.
Well, that's what dating is for.
And look, if you're dating, it's to the intent that you will get married.
And look, if a divorced person, if divorced people are going to get married, the Bible's
very clear.
And we'll look at it here in a second, that they are committing adultery.
So you know, dating and divorce people do not mix.
It's not something that should happen, ever, because it's going to lead to further sin.
And you know, and here's the thing.
I understand, we all understand what the scripture says.
In fact, let's read it here.
It says in verse 5, and Jesus answered and said to them, from the hardness of your heart
he wrote you this preset, but from the beginning of the creation of God made them male and
female.
For this cause shall a man leave his mother and cleave to his wife, and they twain shall
be one flesh.
So then they are no more twain but one flesh, and what therefore God hath joined together
let not man put asunder.
And in the house his disciples asked him again of the same matter, and he saith unto them,
whosoever shall put away his wife and marry another, committeth adultery against her.
You know, case closed.
There's no cute way of tiptoeing around this.
And the reason why the divorce rate is so high in the world, and even in God's house
today, is because preachers read that, and divorce people come in, and they don't want
to preach that.
They want to back away and just say, well, you know, I don't want to offend anybody.
And it's never the goal to offend anybody.
But if I just never preached anything that might potentially, you know, might offend
somebody, you know, I've pretty much just handcuffed myself in preaching.
There's a lot of things I'm not going to be able to talk about if I'm afraid of offending
somebody.
And it's never my goal to offend somebody, but my job is to preach the word of God.
And if that offends people, go ahead and be offended, because I would rather offend
people in the pew than offend God by not preaching his word.
And I don't know anybody who loves the Lord and loves God's word is going to want to hear
what God's word says, whether it offends them or not.
And the Bible's crystal clear here.
He says it.
I don't know how, I mean, it's just, it's just so simple.
Whosoever shall put away his wife and marry another, committeth adultery against her.
And say, okay, well, what if it's the woman, you know, what if it's reversed?
Well, Jesus covered that too.
And if a woman shall put away her husband and be married to another, she committeth
adultery.
He doesn't, you know, he covers both ways there.
And look, it's very clear, you know, there's several other passages we'll look at where
Jesus just explicitly says this.
The Bible says, you know, in the Old Testament, the Lord said, the Lord hateth putting away,
you know, divorce.
And he says, if you are divorced and get remarried, you have committed adultery.
And here's the thing.
People are going to do it anyway.
You know, I've heard plenty of sermons where people just, the preacher gets up and reaches
just like I'm preaching right now.
Gets all mad and frothing and red in the face and starts screaming and yelling about divorce.
And people say, yep, yep.
You know, and people will sit there and listen to the preacher and they'll nod their head
and they'll say, amen.
And then they'll just go out and do it anyway.
And why is that?
You know, because the flesh is weak.
The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.
And I'm not so stupid to think that, oh, it's just never going to happen, that people
are going to, you know, divorce people are going to get remarried.
It's going to happen.
You know, it's just the way it is.
Because of sinful flesh, because of the weakness of flesh, I understand that.
But that doesn't, you know, so I'm just going to take this opportunity to make it perfectly
clear and known where I stand on this issue.
Just in any case, anybody has, you know, seems to think that maybe, you know, I'm going to
tone it down a little bit down here, you know, or maybe I have a different take on it.
You know, like I'm just going to sit on this and not let people know what I think about
it until after I get ordained, you know, Lord willing someday, you know, there's, let me
just go ahead and just, you know, burst your bubble right now, if you take it this way.
There's nothing that I disagree with Pastor Anderson about, nothing.
I mean, there are probably some things, some subtle, nuanced, you know, doctrines that
he holds to that maybe some tiny little thing that I would say, I don't know about that.
When I'm talking about like major doctrine, I'm talking about important things, you know,
things that we all preach, you know, we're all, I'm on the same page as him because the
page we're on is in this book.
We can't help but line up.
It's not that I'm just blindly following Pastor Anderson, it's that I, he believes this book,
I believe this book, okay?
So if you think that this church is going to be faithful word light, that I'm just going
to be this toned down version of Pastor Anderson who's not going to draw a hard line on these
issues, you got another thing coming.
And that's why I'm preaching this tonight, to just make sure everybody knows that no
matter what happens, you know, in this church, this is my take on this issue, is that if
you are divorced and you get married, you have committed adultery, you've sinned against
God and you need to repent.
And you need, and here's the thing, if that hasn't happened and you're contemplating it,
it needs to not happen because it's adultery and we'll talk about that.
Marriage is adultery in the eyes of God.
You go over to Psalms 19, Psalm 19, and we all know the scriptures.
Matthew 5, it hath been said, whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing
of divorcement, but I say unto you that whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause
of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery, and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced,
comitteth adultery.
It's black and white, it's not complicated subject.
Whosoever, Luke 16, whosoever shall put away his wife and marry another, comitteth adultery,
and whosoever shall marry her that is put away from her husband, comitteth adultery.
So I think we've established that, you know, and if you want to argue that, you know, like
I've heard some, even Baptist preachers get up and say, well, you know, if you look in
the Old Testament, when Israel was going, they went, you know, when they went ahead
of the Lord and fought Ai before they were supposed to, you know, they were punished
for it.
It wasn't God's will for them to go ahead of the Lord and, you know, you got married
outside of God's will and, and they got to, so no wonder it ended in divorce.
So of course now it's God's will for you to remarried, to get remarried.
This is the kind of dumb logic that people have.
Even preachers, we're supposed to know the word of God and just preach it wholesale,
no apologies, will go to.
I mean, did you even understand what I just said?
Oh, in the Old Testament, Israel, you know, they've got ahead of God all the time and
got punished for it because they were out of God's will.
That's how they're saying, so you, oh divorcee, divorce person.
You, you got married to an unsaved person, you weren't saved.
That's all back then.
It doesn't count as God's will.
You know, it's a fresh, clean slate with God.
You can go ahead and get remarried.
It's not adultery.
That's wrong.
I mean, then you just, you turn to passages in Mark, Matthew, Luke, and several others
where Jesus just said, it's adultery, it's adultery, it's adultery, it's adultery.
There's no way around it.
And the only reason some preacher would get up and try to just, you know, tip toe around
it, it's cause he's afraid offending people.
And the problem with that is that, yeah, it's no fun to offend people.
But then you have all the other young people, you know, who might be looking up to other
people, who, who might be looking at these people as an example.
And then this takes place and they, and if the preacher doesn't say anything, well, it
must be okay.
Because they, here's, here's a concept that I have to keep in mind.
Silence is agreement.
Something goes on, some sins out there and I don't say anything, everybody else looks
and goes, well, I guess he's okay with that, it must be all right.
That kind of thing happens all the time.
So again, I think we've established that being, getting remarried is adultery if you've
been divorced.
And again, I understand people are going to do it anyway.
People are just going to go ahead and do it.
Because it's a long, lonely life, if you know, and especially if you, if you're not, if you
don't look at it spiritually.
And it takes, it takes real, a real spirituality and I'll, I'll fully admit, look, it's one
thing for me to get up here and tell you this is the way it is, it's another thing for you
to have to go live it.
I understand that, okay?
And that's why I'm just saying, I understand it's human nature, people are going to go
ahead and do it anyway, but I'm not going to just stand idly by and not call it out
for what it is, adultery, okay?
And here's the thing, people do it anyway and what they need to understand if they're
going to go ahead and proceed with this, people that are going to go ahead and just get married
anyway and commit adultery in this fashion, is that there are consequences.
Don't think, well, you know, we know it's wrong.
Look, you knowing it's wrong makes it even worse.
Look here in Psalms 19, verse 7, the law of the Lord is perfect, converting the soul.
The testimony of the Lord is sure, making wise the simple.
The statutes of the Lord are right, rejoicing the heart.
The commandment of the Lord is pure, enlightening the eyes.
The fear of the Lord is clean, enduring forever.
The judgments of the Lord are true and righteous altogether.
More to be desired are they than gold, yea, than much fine gold, sweeter also than the
honeycomb.
Moreover, by them thy servant is warned.
You know, the law of God is all these wonderful things, pure, enlightening, clean, enduring.
You know, it's more to desire than gold, much, much fine gold.
You know what else it does?
It warns God's servants.
It warns the people that need to take heed to the things that are written in the law
of God.
Moreover, by them thy servant is warned.
And look, I'm reading these passages on adultery tonight and divorce so that God's servants
can be warned.
And you just say, well I haven't done that, good, keep it that way.
Well I haven't gotten married and divorced, good, keep it that way.
You're being warned tonight.
And the fact that you're sitting under preaching like this only makes you more accountable
to God.
Which means if you go ahead and do it anyway, then the consequences could be even greater.
Because you know, God gives grace to people who do things out of ignorance.
I mean the Apostle Paul, you know, he says that.
He said, you know, but I found grace because I did it ignorantly in unbelief, talking about
how he persecuted the church.
But if we know, if we've been warned, if we've read the word of God, if we've heard the preaching
on this subject and go ahead and do it anyway, you know, the consequences could be worse.
And there will always be consequences, ignorant or not.
I'm just saying they'll be worse.
Him that knew his servant's will, his Lord's will and did it not shall be beaten with many
stripes, the Bible says.
But he who didn't do his servant's, did not know his Lord's will, he shall be beaten with
few stripes, the Bible says.
And look here when he goes on and says in verse 12, he says in verse 11, moreover by
them thy servant is warned and in keeping of them there is great reward.
Who can understand his errors?
Cleanse thou me from secret faults.
Keep back thy servant from presumptuous sins.
He's saying, well, I'm being tempted to just go ahead and do it anyway.
You need to pray that prayer and say, keep me from doing something presumptuously.
And he said, but you say, he says, keep thy servant back from presumptuous sins.
What does that mean to be presumptuous?
To presume something, right?
Although being a presumptuous person is defined as a person failing to observe the limits
of what is permitted or appropriate.
If you're just presumptuous, you are a person who fails to observe the limits of what is
permitted or appropriate.
You say, oh, I know what's wrong.
I know what's permitted.
I know what the limits are, but I'm going to go ahead and do it anyway.
I'm not going to have any respect for those limits.
Oh, I know what God's will is.
I know what the Bible says.
I know what the preacher said.
But you know what?
I'm going to go ahead and do it anyway.
That's a presumptuous sin.
And that's worse than just going, you know, because sometimes we sin and we go, oh, man.
Or it just happens.
It's just all of a sudden.
Something pops into our mind.
We think something.
We look at something.
We say something.
We do something.
We say, oh, instantly, man, I didn't mean to do that.
And that's wrong, you know, and we should confess it.
We should forsake it.
And God will give us mercy.
But when we say, oh, I know if I do this, I'm in sin.
I know if I do this, you know, I'm going to be sitting against God.
I'm breaking his commandments.
Should I do it or not?
I'm going to do it.
That's presumptuous.
That's a presumptuous sin.
And it has far greater consequences than if something you just kind of do out of nature,
out of habit, whatever.
Go over to 2 Peter chapter 2, 2 Peter chapter 2.
You know, and being presumptuous is, is, is one of these attributes that you can, that,
that very wicked people share.
And look, I'm not saying, you know, if you do this, if you're some kind of a presumptuous,
if you're presumptuous enough to go ahead and get married or get married after having
been divorced, I'm saying it's a wicked sin.
You shouldn't do it.
The Bible condemns it over and over again.
But I'm not going to sit there and say you're some kind of a reprobate or, you know, God,
you're just, your life's over or whatever.
But I am saying this, that you share an attribute with very wicked people by being so presumptuous.
It says in 2 Peter chapter 2 verse 9, the Lord knoweth how to deliver the godly out
of temptations.
Well, I just don't know.
I don't know if I can go the rest of my life without, you know, getting married.
What do you, I know I'm divorced.
You're telling me I just got to live my whole life single?
Yeah.
Yup.
That's what the Bible says.
Well, it wasn't my fault.
I don't, you know, it's not my, I'm sorry.
You're the one that married that individual.
You know, I'm sorry.
You're the one that made those decisions.
There's no, you know, there's no cause in the word of God for this.
Well, I just don't know how I can do it.
There's just too much temptation.
Yeah.
But the Bible says the Lord knoweth how to deliver the godly out of temptation.
The problem is, is that we don't want to be delivered.
We just want to do the easy thing and just give in and just let, you know, just feel
the release.
Maybe you'll take the burden off of us of not having to resist sin anymore.
You notice how to deliver the godly out of temptations and it says, and to reserve the
unjust in the day of judgment to be punished, but chiefly them that walk after the flesh
in the lust of uncleanness and despise government.
So he's talking about very wicked people.
Presumptuous are they?
That's not an attribute you want to share with people who walk after the flesh in the
lust of uncleanness and despise government that are self-willed, that are not afraid
to speak evil of, evil of dignities.
Now 2 Peter chapter 2 is talking about, you know, false prophets.
They say, I'm not saying you're a false prophet, but I'm just saying if you're, if you know
what you're going to do with sin, you know you're not supposed to do it and you've been
warned, you go ahead and do it anyway, you share an attribute with them.
It's called being presumptuous.
And God's, you know, that's just going to make the consequences worse.
You know, very well could.
And why are people presumptuous?
Why, what you'd say, well, who would do that?
Why would people just be, know their Lord's will, know they're not supposed to do anything
and be so presumptuous to go ahead and do it anyway?
Well, it says right there, they are not afraid to speak evil of dignities.
They are not afraid.
The reason people do things like this and that are, become presumptuous and just go
ahead and just do things they know they're not supposed to is because there's no fear
or there's not the appropriate level of fear.
And that's kind of why I'm preaching this because I want to put fear into people's lives
and into their hearts about this before they do something that's going to get them chastened
by God.
You should be more afraid of God than remaining single.
You know, if you've gotten divorced and you're just looking at the rest of your life of being
a single person and that frightens you, God should frighten you more.
You should be more afraid of what God will do to you if you go ahead and presumptuously
sin against him.
But here's the thing.
I can get up and I can preach all that and I can tell people this and they'll go, yep,
he's right and they're going to do it anyway.
They're going to go right ahead and do it anyway.
Go over to Matthew chapter 19, Matthew chapter 19.
Same scenario, parallel passage as we, as what we read earlier, where the Pharisees
come to him, tempting him, saying, hey, is it lawful for man to put away his wife?
He tells them how Moses gave him the bill of divorcement for the hardness of their hearts.
And he says in verse nine, and I say unto you, whosoever shall put away his wife, except
before fornication, shall marry another, commiteth adultery, and whoso will marry her, which
is put away, doth commit adultery.
You say you're repeating self.
Yeah.
So is Jesus.
You know, if you read your Bible through on a regular basis, Jesus would be repeating
himself quite a bit about the subject.
So pardon me if I repeat myself a little bit tonight.
Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another,
commiteth adultery, and whoso will marryeth her, which is put away, doth commit adultery.
And then look at disciples at reaction.
It's disciples saying to them, if this is the case of, if this, if the case of the man
be so with his wife, it is good not to marry.
They're saying it'd just be better not to marry at all then, because then their minds
are thinking, well, everyone gets a divorce.
You know, they're thinking, if that's the case, you know, if you can't just get divorced
and be married.
And they're, it's a kind of a carnal thing that they're saying.
You're kind of like, it always takes me aback when you're, when you're reading.
It's like, come on, guys, you're the 12 disciples here.
But look at the prevailing culture that they're in with the Pharisees.
Isn't it lawful?
I mean, they were just like, oh, she burned the muffins.
That's it.
Where's that bill of divorcement?
I'm out of here.
Time to switch it up.
You know, this is just what they did.
And they say, hey, it's better than good not to marry.
And he said unto them, all men cannot receive this saying, save to whom it is given.
For there are some eunuchs which have been so born from their mother's womb, there are
some eunuchs which were made eunuchs of men, and there be eunuchs which have made themselves
eunuchs for the kingdom of God's sake.
He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.
He's saying, look, I know it's, it's a hard saying, and look, not everybody's going to
be able to live up to it.
And, and the vast majority of people are probably just going to go ahead and do it anyway.
So you know, the warning is, you know, you can go ahead and do it like so many people
do.
And look, and I've, and I've listened to preaching on this, and, and I, you know, and Pastor
Anderson has said in his sermons when he talks about this, is that more people have left
our church over this topic than any other.
It happens all the time.
There's been so many we couldn't even recount them all.
People come and say, hey, can you perform this wedding?
Or have either of you been married?
Yeah, nope, can't do it.
Then they're gone.
You never see them again.
You get up and preach this.
They get offended.
They leave.
Because they want to just go get married and, and they, and they leave of their own accord.
And, and you know what?
I'm not afraid of losing people because I'm not, I'm not trying to build a church that's
got a bunch of sinful people in it that want to just, you know, flaunt God's laws, flaunt
God's commandments, and just do whatever they want despite the preaching.
You know, I'm not looking for that.
I'm not looking to have people be role models to my children who are just going to despise
the word of God and just say, and say, oh, I love the Lord and then just go right up
against it.
And if people want to leave over this sermon, but go ahead because I'm not trying to build
some mega church here.
I'm trying to preach the word of God.
You know, I'm interested in preaching to people who want to love the Lord, live clean lives
and obey his commandments and serve him with, with, with, with, uh, integrity and honesty
and truth and righteousness.
That's what I'm interested in.
And look, if all we ever get is this big and we still met and it takes us another decade
or two to accomplish the goal of preaching the gospel and knocking every door in the
city of Tucson, so be it.
I'm not opposed to a big church either.
If God wants to bless this church and bring a bunch of people in here so we can accomplish
that goal even quicker and do greater things for him.
Amen.
I'm all for that.
But I'm not going to do that at the cost of compromising the word of God.
And he's not going to bless that.
You know, if I got up here and said, you know, I know that's what we've, that's the standard
we've held here, but down here it's a little different, you know, and I don't have to hold
that much of a heart.
I just didn't say anything at all and just went over the corner and let people do whatever
they want.
God's not going to bless that.
What God's going to bless is the faithful preaching of his word and he's going to bless
people that are obedient to his word.
People are going to do it anyway, but, and if, you know, if that's somebody on the sound
of my voice that's going to do it anyway, don't think your problems are over.
I think, oh, I'm going to go ahead and just do get married to, you know, I'm divorced
and, you know, just get remarried and that's going to solve my problems.
Nope.
The problems have only begun.
You know, the first marriage, most people then who fail in marriage the first time,
they're 60% more likely to fail the second time.
Second marriages fail more than first marriages.
And here's the thing, and this is, this is kind of like, and I go back and forth on whether
I should even go here with this, but because this is, this is the thing, people, people
say, you know, and they wonder, well, if we go ahead and get married and commit adultery,
are we going to get kicked out of the church?
And I've been, you know, I've never wanted to clarify that.
I like to let people just wonder about that.
I like that to just kind of keep them up at night.
I like that to kind of make them sweat a little bit and maybe go, well, maybe we shouldn't
do it because we might get kicked out of church.
But you know, first Corinthians five does not list divorce or there's nowhere in scripture
that says I can kick you out of church over that.
Now I'll admit in my flesh, I wish there was a clause to kick people out for that.
You know, when I get, when I, when I get here about it and it makes me mad and it makes
me angry and that's a big reason why I need to preach is just get it off my chest so I
can get it over with and leave it in the past and people can just make whatever decisions
they want.
So, you know, if you want to go ahead and get married and commit adultery, no, you're
not going to get kicked out of church.
I don't have that authority.
No, no preacher does.
You know, first Corinthians five, it's fornication, drunkenness.
What else?
I'm there.
Did I have you turn there?
I didn't.
I'll just read it for you.
You know, if he's, if he is called a brother, if he that is called a brother be a fornicator,
covetous, an idolater, a railer, a drunkard, or extortioner, you know, and there's other
passages we could turn to in Romans and Matthew where there's other instances where people
could be kicked out of the church, you know, a few more, but it's not divorce and remarriage.
It's not there.
And say, oh, okay, well, if that's the case, I'll go ahead and do it then.
Okay, but what about God?
I mean, just worried about what the, how the church is going to take it, how I'm going
to take it.
I mean, what about God?
I mean, what does that say about a person with that?
Well, that's, well, I would do this as long as I knew I wouldn't get kicked out of church.
That is so, that is such a lack of spirituality.
It's astounding.
It says so much about a person where they're at spiritually.
They need to grow up and understand that God is watching.
It's not just me.
And say, oh, well, you know, I'd be embarrassed to come back to church now after that sermon.
What's the difference when you walk through that door and you got a ring on your finger?
You'd be just as embarrassed then.
What difference does it make?
And people are going to go ahead and do it anyway, and they can live with the consequences,
but you know what, one of those consequences will not be you get kicked out of church.
And like I said, people end up leaving on their own in that instance typically.
They just go ahead and leave anyway.
And I'm, you know, I don't want to lose people, it's not the goal, but I, the goal is to preach
the word of God and to warn other people who have not made that mistake so that they don't
have to, you know, go through that.
You might not get kicked out of church, but it's not going to prevent God from judging
you.
And that's the scariest thing, that is the scariest thing, especially when it's people
who have already, you know, even admitted to God having judged them in the past for
similar sins.
And then you're going to go ahead and do it again anyway.
That's, it's, it's frightening.
You know, we're not going to kick you out of church, but here's, here's where we draw
the line at Faithful Word, we're not going to kick you out of church if you go ahead
and get remarried as a divorce person, but we're not going to condone, we're not going
to condone it.
I'm not going to walk up and congratulate you.
I'm not going to participate in it.
And it's, it's foolish to ask somebody else who loves God and loves his word and understands
what the scripture says to come and, and participate in your sin.
Pick any other sin.
Hey, after church tonight, guys, I'm going to go down to the bar and get blind drunk
and you don't have to do it.
I wouldn't want you to sin, but I just want you to come watch.
I just want you to come there and when I walk out staggering and barfing, I just want you
to be there to catch me and pick me up and put me in a, in a cab.
Can you, okay, that's all.
And you say, well, that's ridiculous.
It's just, you know what's just as ridiculous?
Asking somebody who knows what the Bible says and loves the Lord to come and participate
in you committing adultery.
It's just as ridiculous.
So don't come to me and say, hey, we got married.
Can you put our anniversary in the bulletin?
It's not going in.
I'm not going, oh, happy anniversary on your adultery.
And here, let me just clarify, you know, when, when people do this, when they go ahead and
commit adultery, they get remarried.
It's not like they're in a perpetual state of sin for the rest of their life.
Okay.
They've just committed a very big sin in front of the eye, in the eyes of God.
That's all they've done.
Okay.
But it's not like they're, they're going to just continually be in sin from that day forward.
And if people have already made that mistake, again, they just need to confess it, forsake
it and move on with their life and be faithful to the spouse they have married.
And I'm not going to condone it.
I'm not going to celebrate it.
I'm not going to participate in it with those who choose to get remarried.
So do not expect a congratulations from me.
And I want to, and the title of the sermon, you know, was dating for and the divorced.
So let me go ahead and give some advice to divorce, some dating advice to divorced people.
I'm going to, you know, you say, I'm divorced, what's, let me give you some sound dating
device.
You got no business doing it.
And because divorce people have no business dating anybody because the purpose of dating
is to get married because they should have no business doing it.
I'm going to go ahead and say this people, and this is just my opinion.
Okay.
This isn't, this isn't like, you know, if I find out you're doing this, it's, you know,
here comes another sermon, but I'm, you know, I'm just backing the truck up.
Okay.
Cause this is something that's been on my, you know, I've wanted to say for a long time.
And now that it's gotten to this point, I'm just going to go back up the truck right now
and just, and just say it all and get it off my chest.
People who are divorced have no business dating and therefore have no business being friends
with people of the opposite gender.
There I said it.
If you're divorced and you have no, and you, and even you say, oh, I should never get married.
Then you have no business being friends with people of the opposite gender.
And I mean friends.
And I, and you know, I, and people debate this and the world, but even the world agrees
and any honest man will agree with this.
I asked my wife this last night.
I said, do you think men and women can just have a platonic relationship that they can
just be friends?
She said, yeah.
And most women will say that.
They'll say, yeah, of course.
Most women think that because they don't understand the mind of a man.
The minds of man is completely different.
Men are not interested in being friends with women.
They always want to get remote romantically involved with a woman.
They always want to go to the next level.
You know, they, they, they're, they're not fans of the friend zone, right?
All the, you know, women, they have a nice big zone called the friend zone and they have
no problem just taking men over there and go, oh, you're my friend, no, you're my friend.
And every guy that's in the friend zone hates it and he's, you know, eventually stops being
friends.
He says, well, if I can't get what I want, if I can't take this to a romantic level,
then I'm out.
The world understands this.
There's whole articles written about it.
There's people that go around it, you know, man on the street interviews, hey, do you
think a man and women could just be just friends?
Every guy, nope.
Every guy, no way.
Not interested.
Every woman, oh, I think so, yeah, sure, because their minds don't work the same.
And that's why I'm saying this, that if you're divorced, you don't have any business dating
anybody.
And because you don't have any business dating anybody, you have no business being friends
with people of the opposite gender.
And there's whole studies out there and you say, well, I'm not attracted to them, I can
be friends with them and not have that kind of temptation.
You're kidding yourself.
The Bible says in Proverbs, can a man take fire in his bosom and not, and his clothes
not be burned?
Can a man take fire in his clothes and his bosom and not be burned?
Can one go upon hot coals and his feet not be burned?
You say, no, I can be around women and not be attracted to them.
But there's studies out there that prove that the longer you're with somebody, you
will become attracted to them.
Why do you think adultery takes place so often in the workplace?
People that would otherwise not be, you wouldn't pass each other by in the street just, you
know, casually, just randomly, you know, and then find themselves committing sin, you know,
you put those same two people in a workplace situation where they're spending every day
together for hours on end, weeks on end, months on end, years go by, next thing you know,
they commit adultery and everyone's like, oh, I'm so shocked.
No, it's just a fact.
People who are, otherwise wouldn't be attracted to each other, the longer they're around each
other because of the pheromones, hormones, familiarity, opportunity, convenience, the
longer they're in that situation, the easier it becomes to just go to the next level with
that person.
That's why men and women should not be friends.
I mean, is that, do you think that's why God designed us as men and women to be friends?
God made men and women for a very specific, specific purpose.
I mean, think about it.
God could have just made us all men or just made us all women, but he made us in his image
so he made us all, you know, as men, right?
And he could have said, well, as far as, you know, bringing other life into the world,
he could have just, kids could just hatch.
They could just grow out of the ground like a, like a plant.
There could be like a baby tree where we just go, we just pluck babies from the tree every
so often and that's your baby.
I mean, God could have come up with any other number of ways to give us children, but how
did he choose to do it?
Through the relationship of a man and a woman.
That's how God chose, chose to do it.
That's why he made man and woman.
Well, you're going to sit there and tell me that you could just override all of that and
just be friends with somebody.
You're kidding yourself if you think that's the truth.
That is the purpose of being made man and woman.
It's for a very specific relationship between a husband and wife to fulfill those needs
and to procreate.
There are no, we should not be friends.
Show me an example in the Bible.
Okay, how about this?
I'm a married man, right?
What if I just wanted to go be best friends with some woman?
Who here would think that's inappropriate?
Go ahead.
I do.
But wait a minute, I'm just friends.
It's no harm in that.
I'm just, I know I'm married.
I'm not doing anything though.
In fact, I can show you where I just, I haven't done anything.
That would be inappropriate.
Why?
Because we all know where it leads.
Because we know that if I spend enough time around that other woman and get friendly enough
with her, I'll be committing adultery.
You know, well that's different because you're, because you're married though.
Yeah, but it's the same principle at work.
The same thing's going to happen to you.
Oh, you know, the same thing's going to happen to the divorced guy that goes around and hangs
around some other woman.
Eventually they're going to end up committing adultery because that's where it always leads.
Men and women cannot be just friends.
Go over to, go over to 1 Thessalonians chapter 5 verse 22.
And you know, and it's just, it's, it's, it's frustrating because it's like when this type
of thing happens, you can just see it, you can see it a mile away.
It's just like, it's like you're watching a train wreck in slow motion.
Because the Bible says can a man take fire in his bosom and his clothes not be burned?
It's like, you know, if you're hanging around the opposite gender, you're getting real friendly.
You spend a lot of time around them.
It's just, it's just a matter of time.
And it's like, well, why don't you say something then?
Because it usually doesn't do any good.
And you know, it's really not my business.
I can go and warn people.
And look, I have preached sermons from this pulpit.
This isn't the first time I've preached something along these lines.
And I've warned people and I've seen people nod their heads and I've heard people say
amen.
And they know it.
And then they, and then it goes ahead and happens anyway.
Because a man cannot take fire in his bosom and his clothes not be burned.
There are always consequences for your actions every time.
And if you think you can just go pal around with people of the opposite gender and just,
you know, spend lots of time with them and not go to the next level, even to the place
where you're going to commit sin, you're kidding yourself.
There are consequences for every decision we make.
And here's the thing.
Let's say, let's just pretend for a minute.
Let's just go into la la land.
You know, let's go into make believe world.
Let's go to our imagination station and just pretend that men and women can be friends
without anything, you know, anything happening.
Without it eventually leading to fornication, adultery.
You know, and that's not, here's the thing.
It's not always a bad thing for a man and woman to be friends.
Like I said, if they're dating, you know, nine of them have been married, they're looking
for a spouse, that's fine, you know, but that's where it's leading is marriage.
If it's not leading there, there's no point in dating, okay?
But let's just say, you know, that there's these make believe people of opposite genders
that can hang around and spend time with each other, you know, you know, go in and out of
each other's houses, spend the night in each other's houses, and just, you know, never,
never touch one another, never do anything inappropriate.
Okay, let's, we'll go there.
But what about the way it looks?
What about just the way it looks?
When people look like a couple, talk like a couple, behave like a couple, are left alone
in rooms, in a house like a couple, stay the night in people's houses like a couple, but
we're not a couple, but you're doing everything that a couple does, except for that one thing,
because that would be going too far.
The Bible says abstain from all appearance of evil, and I preached this six months ago,
that you shouldn't even look like you're doing something wrong.
You know, what do the neighbors think?
What do the neighbors think?
Boy, he comes around a lot, boy, she's over there after a lot, and they're probably just
in there playing part cheesy.
I'm sure, you know, that's not what the world thinks, because that's what the world thinks
you're doing exactly what they do, hooking up, one night stands, fornicating.
That's what they do.
They're thinking, oh, good for them.
And then they find out, oh, they go to that church.
And now you're bringing your approach on the name of Christ, because you can't abstain
even from the appearance of evil.
And look, if you can't even abstain from the appearance of evil, how in the world are you
going to abstain from evil itself?
You're not going to be able to.
If you can't even keep yourself from not even looking like you're doing something wrong,
eventually you're going to do something severely wrong.
And what's crazy is, you know, people will go ahead and, and, and commit adultery, divorce
people get married and say, oh, we just love each other.
You know, and there might be, there might be true.
They, maybe they do really love each other, but what does it say, are you in Romans 13?
Did I have you go there?
Well, go to Romans 13, I already read it for some audience.
What does it first says, Romans 13, love worketh no ill to his neighbor.
You know, if you really love somebody, you wouldn't work any ill toward them.
If you really love somebody, you wouldn't put them in a position where they get embarrassed,
or would have to, or you wouldn't, you know, proposition them to commit sin.
If you really love somebody, you know, you wouldn't put yourself in a position where
they look like they're doing something evil, or actually doing something evil.
That's what somebody who really loves somebody does.
They care about them, they protect them, and they make sure that they don't harm them anyway.
They work no ill towards their neighbor.
Now jump down to verse 14.
But put ye on the Lord Jesus Christ and make no provision for the flesh to fulfill the
lust thereof.
This is why men and women should not be friends unless if there are, you know, are, are, are,
are cleared to date and get married.
Because they're, otherwise they're making provision for the flesh.
And all they're doing is they're just, they're just building it up and just, there's nowhere,
you know, if you're divorced and you're just saying, well, I'm just giving you friends
with this person and it has nowhere to go, I mean, you're just, why would you do that
to yourself?
You're just making provision for the flesh, making provision for the flesh, making provision
for the flesh, making provision, and then just never giving the flesh what it wants.
Don't be surprised one day when you just snap and go ahead and just give into the flesh
and go ahead and just do whatever sin it is.
That's how it works.
That's why the Bible says make no provision for it.
Don't even give it opportunity.
Don't feed it.
Don't, don't, don't make opportunity for the, for the flesh.
And look, I don't want to go long on this.
I just, I just needed to say it because it needs to be said.
Because this church needs to know where I stand on it and going forward.
No, if you do that, you're not kicked out.
But you know, you'll, you'll face the wrath of God.
You'll face his judgment, whatever, and whatever he doles out, that's up to him.
I, I can't tell you.
I can't tell you what the consequences will be.
But here's, here's my, here, here are the options for people that are in that position.
If there's people that are pondering, you know, whether or not they as a divorced person
should get married or not, you know, you really have two options, okay?
Go over to 1 Timothy chapter 5, 1 Timothy chapter 5.
Your first option is to go ahead and do it, right?
And that's always an option.
Obviously, people do it all the time.
In spite of everything that I just said, in
spite of all the teachings from scripture, they go ahead and just do it anyway.
1 Timothy chapter 5, look at verse 11.
In fact, the Bible tells us that people are going to do it.
You know, and this is talking, you know, this is talking about widows, but
you could apply it to any, you know, any woman who has, you know,
been separated from her husband, whether it's through being widowed or being divorced.
Okay?
It's the same impulse as at play.
It says let, let's go back to verse nine.
Let not a widow be taken into the number under three
score years old, having been the wife of one man.
So the Bible does teach that the church's job, in some instances, is to care, and
it's speaking financially, taken into the number, we
are to financially support widows in certain circumstances.
You know, unless they have children or nephews, which means
grandchildren, you know, that they are to you know, provide for them as their members of their own house.
But if the woman is truly destitute, has no children, has no grandchildren, and if she's met all these other criteria,
washing the saints feet, diligently, you know, brought up children, or faithfully
brought up children, diligently pursued every good work, I mean, if she's got a great testimony.
And, you know, that's all the qualifications for her as a widow to be taken to the church.
But it also says she's not to be taken to the number under three score years old, that's 60 years old.
And what he's saying is like, look, you can just take it to the bank, that until they reach a certain age,
you know, they're not going to, they're not going to, they're, they're going to want to remarry.
Having been the wife of one man, well reported of good works, if she had brought up children,
if she had lodged strangers, if she had washed the saints feet, if she had relieved the afflicted,
if she had diligently followed every good work, but the younger widows refuse, for
when they have begun to wax wanton against Christ, they will marry.
So this is a viable option.
This is something that people do.
People do it all the time.
In fact, Paul is saying, look, Timothy, make sure they're 60 and have been married,
the wife of one man and done all these other things because otherwise the younger women
refuse them because of the fact when they begin to wax wanton against Christ, they will marry.
Having damnation because they cast off their first faith.
Now that damnation there is not talking about losing your salvation, you understand that?
It's talking about judgment.
It's talking about having God's condemnation upon them for going ahead and waxing wanton against him.
So that's option one for, for, you know, and I, again, I know this is a time of widows,
but you could apply this to the person who doesn't want to just remain single, love the Lord,
serve him, you know, you can go ahead and cast off your first faith.
And you know what?
It's damnation.
And you say, well, that's, you're just being so mean.
You know what would be meaner of me?
Is to not get up and tell you that.
And just say, hey, no, you're fine, go ahead.
Okay, because I'm not going to change God's mind on this subject.
Well, the, well, the preacher said it would be okay.
God's not getting, when the preacher's wrong, then I'll get some too.
And I'll say, oh, here's some damnation for you too, for lying to the people.
For telling them lies and preaching lies.
Not telling them the truth.
Or just not saying anything at all.
Just, you know, like some big dumb dope, I'm just going to not,
just pretend nothing's going on in, in this church.
I'm not going to say anything, I don't want to make anybody mad.
That would be the mean thing for me to do.
The most love, you know, faithful are the wounds of a friend.
You know, you know, open rebuke is better than secret love.
Let the righteous smite me, it shall be an anointing in my head, the Bible says.
You know, it's the loving thing is what I'm doing tonight.
Getting up and warning people, hey, avoid damnation.
Avoid the condemnation of God.
Avoid judgment of God in your life, and don't commit sin.
Stop making provision for the flesh.
And, and you know what?
Just love the Lord, and live, live for God.
Well, that doesn't sound very, well, you know what?
They grow some spiritual bones.
Get some, get an ounce of spirituality in your body then.
That's option one.
Option two, let's go over to Luke, I should have had to go over there.
Luke chapter two.
I want to, I want to point out a lady who is a very admirable lady that we kind of
just, you know, we read about her quickly, we go through Luke, she gets a quick
mention, like it's a big deal to get mentioned in the word of God, right?
So what did this lady do that was so
admirable that she even gets written down in the eternal word of God?
You know, your first option is to, is to be, you know, to cast off your first faith.
Wax wanton against Christ, remarry, and go ahead and have whatever condemnation God
sees fit to give you as a result.
Option two is be like Anna.
Anna, in Luke chapter two, let's look at verse 36.
Of course, this is when, you know, Jesus has been born, and Joseph and Mary are
bringing him to the temple to dedicate him.
And it says in verse, verse 36, and she was, yeah, 36.
And there was one Anna, a prophetess, the daughter of Phanuel, of the tribe of Asher.
She was of a great age.
So, you know, it wasn't, it wasn't like the great age, you know, it doesn't mean
she was 30, because everyone knows 30 is a great age, right?
Actually 40 is, but what it's meaning is there's, she's got a lot of age.
And so the Bible's very nicely saying she was old, you know.
She was of a great age, and had lived with a husband seven years from her virginity.
So she got married, and then seven years later, she was widowed.
And she was a widow, it says in verse seven, verse 37.
And about, she was a widow of about four score and four years.
This woman was a widow for 84 years.
84 years she went living a single life, serving God, loving the Lord.
And that's what it says.
She says there, which departed not from the temple,
but served God with fastings and prayers night and day.
That's a great testimony, isn't it?
To be like this woman, this Anna.
And here's the thing about Anna, she was widowed.
She was not divorced.
Anna could have, you know, the Bible says that if her husband be dead,
she's free to marry, that it's not a sin.
Anna could have easily gone and found another man to get married to and raise a family.
But she decided that for 84 years of her life, she'd rather just serve God.
I mean, that's more spirituality than, you know, that's a lot.
I don't want to sit here and compare everybody to her,
but that's some serious dedication to the Lord.
Say, well, I just don't know if I can face the next 20, 30, maybe 40 years of my life.
Well, okay, how about no one's asking you to do 84, you know, depending on how old you are.
I mean, obviously she must have gotten married, you know,
pretty young and it says she was of a great age.
She might have been like 90, 100, you know, whatever.
Very old lady.
She went 84 years.
Well, I just don't know if I could do another however many years on this earth.
Okay, well, once you get to 84 of being single,
then come talk to me and tell me about how hard it is.
And I'm not saying it's easy.
I'm not saying that, you know, you're not going to close the door at night
and lay your head down the pillow and it's going to be lonely.
I'm not saying it's going to be, you know, easy when you could use some help somewhere,
or I'm not saying it's not going to be easy when you're going through some hardship or some trial
that, you know, you're not going to have somebody to lean on.
I'm not saying it's easy, but I'm saying it's possible.
And if you don't think, oh, it's just impossible.
No, you want it to be impossible.
People want it to be impossible because they can say, well, it's impossible.
I just can't do it, so I might as well just give in and get remarried.
But I look at a lady like Anna who very easily could have gotten married
and she would have been perfectly just in doing so,
who went 84 years happily as a widow.
And what was it that got her through?
Did she just go, you think Anna just every day was just thinking about the fact that
she's not married and what a drudgery it is to serve God and how she just can't stand,
you know, no, she served God with prayers night and day,
fasting, she was in the temple, she was in church.
I mean, she was involved.
The reason people struggle is because they're just carnal.
They just need to get their eyes off of this life and think about eternal life.
And I understand it's easier said than done, but you know what?
It needs to be said.
It needs to be said because some people, they're going to do it anyway.
They're just going to do it anyway, despite all of that.
And I'm just letting everybody know that it doesn't have to be that way.
And I'm trying to help people that are in that position and help them to see,
like there's examples.
I mean, think about Paul.
Paul said, have I not power to get married?
I mean, don't I have power to lead about a sister or wife, you know, a sister in the Lord?
He says, I do.
I have every right to get married, but he didn't because he wanted to serve God.
And he's, and look, he's not even a person that was forbidden from being married again
that the Bible would condemn.
And he willingly went and chose not to.
But then you get divorced.
People just say, oh, I just can't do it.
I just can't, I can't bear the thought of living the rest of my life.
It's like, well, you need to just quit thinking about how you're going to live the rest of
your life alone and start thinking about how alone you're not, especially if you're in
a good church.
You got, you know, you know, you've got, you know, sometimes the divorce people, they've
already got kids.
It's like, what's wrong with the ones you've already got?
You've already got friends.
You've already got a great church.
You know, you've already got the Lord.
You've got all these other relationships in your life.
You know, and then you just say, well, I just can't do it alone.
It's like, well, thanks.
Appreciate it.
Everybody else in your life is just like, oh, thanks.
I guess we're just whatever to you then.
I guess we're just not enough.
I, you know, and I, and I don't want to rant and rave all night, but it needed to be said,
folks.
It needed to be preached.
And again, I'm not trying to hurt people's feelings.
I'm not trying to make people mad, but people need to understand where we stand on this
line and this, on this issue that we draw the line of you can go ahead and do it.
You can come to church here, but don't expect me to just walk up to you and ask how it went.
If you want to go ahead and do that, don't ask other people.
And I will call it out by name.
If I find out people are going around in this church and trying to get other people to come
to their, their little wedding and celebrate this.
If I find out that's going on, I will call it out by name.
I'm not going to let that take because I'm not just going to go approved by not saying
anything.
So don't do that.
If you're going to do that, here's how you need to do it.
You need to go tuck your tail between your legs and go down to the courthouse and get
it over with, you know, and here's the thing.
I'm, I'm over it.
You know, I said my piece and I'm, I'm ready to move on for myself.
Okay.
And I, and I'm done.
I'm done with the whole thing and people can do whatever they want and they can live with
the consequences, but you can't let it be said that I didn't get up and warn people
and tell people what the Bible says and where we stand.
Let's go ahead and pray.