Thank you very much.
Thank you.
Amen.
Good morning.
Let's start our second service.
The Baptist Church Manila.
Let's start by turning our hymns to hymn number 246.
Let's get our hymns to the maroon hymn book and let's turn to hymn number 246.
Let's sing a song with hymn.
On the first.
It started forever.
My
I
Let's pray.
The red part, we thank you Lord for this morning.
May I ask the Lord to confess our second service this morning.
And I pray, O God, that you will continue to work through us in peace with this church Lord.
And I pray that you will continue to bless this church and guide us.
Lord, help us to be attentive with the sermon.
And I pray that you will help our side people Lord.
And each and every one is faithful.
And I pray, O God, that you will also bless us.
We are published in this offering over the lunch.
And also I pray that you will also bless us for the soul leaving this offering.
We are asking all these things in his name we pray. Amen.
For our next song, let's turn to hymn number 250.
Hymn number 250.
Burdens are lifted at Calgary.
Hymn number 250.
Burdens are lifted at Calgary.
Days are filled with sorrow and care.
Ready on the first.
Sing.
Days are filled with sorrow and care.
Hearts are lonely and fear.
Burdens are lifted at Calgary.
Jesus is very near.
Burdens are lifted at Calgary.
Calgary.
Burdens are lifted at Calgary.
Jesus is very near.
Gas your air on Jesus today.
Fear, worry and fear.
Burdens are lifted at Calgary.
Jesus is very near.
Burdens are lifted at Calgary.
Calgary.
Burdens are lifted at Calgary.
Jesus is very near.
Troubled soul, the Savior can see.
Every heart, faith and fear.
Burdens are lifted at Calgary.
Jesus is very near.
Burdens are lifted at Calgary.
Calgary.
Burdens are lifted at Calgary.
Calgary.
Burdens are lifted at Calgary.
Jesus is very near.
Anybody 10?
All right.
One.
One of those days.
All right.
Ten.
One.
Anybody else?
All right.
15 more.
Great job, everyone.
The only other thing to announce is that in two weeks we do have our monthly prayer meeting.
Let's sing the first song.
Amen for our next song.
Let's turn to hymn number 212.
Hymn number 212.
Let's sing the song, Oh Happy Day.
Oh happy day that picks my toys on the first hymn number 212.
Ready.
Sing.
Oh happy day that picks my toys on the first hymn number 212.
Ready.
Sing.
Oh happy day that picks my toys on the first hymn number 212.
Ready.
Sing.
Oh happy day that picks my toys on the first hymn number 212.
Ready.
Sing.
Oh happy day that picks my toys on the first hymn number 212.
Ready.
Sing.
Oh happy day that picks my toys on the first hymn number 212.
Happy day.
When Jesus washed my sins away.
He's got the great transaction done.
I am the Lord.
And He is my union.
I am the Lord.
Try to confess the voice divine.
Happy day.
When Jesus washed my sins away.
He taught me how to wash away and live rejoicing every day.
Happy day.
When Jesus washed my sins away.
On the last.
Ready.
Sing.
Now rest my long divided heart and fix this blissful center rest.
Nor ever from my Lord depart with Him of every good possess.
Happy day.
When Jesus washed my sins away.
He taught me how to watch and pray and live rejoicing every day.
Happy day.
When Jesus washed my sins away.
Let's take our offering.
Happy day.
Amen. Please opening your Bibles to the Song of Solomon.
Song of Solomon chapter 6.
Psalm Solomon chapter 6, and as our custom we will be reading the entire chapter.
Psalm Solomon chapter 6, please say amen if you are there.
Amen.
Psalm Solomon chapter 6 verse 1,
Whither is thy beloved gun, O thou fairest among women?
Whither is thy beloved turn aside, as we may seek him with thee?
My beloved is gone down into his garden, to the beds of spices, to feed in the gardens, and to gather lilies.
I am my beloved's, and my beloved is mine. He feedeth among the lilies.
Thou art beautiful, O my love, as Tirzah, commonly as Jerusalem, terrible as an army with banners.
Turn away thine eyes from me, for they have overcome me.
Thy heiress is a flock of goats that appear from Gilead.
Thy teeth are as a flock of sheep which go up from the washing,
whereof every one bear twins, and there is not one barren among them.
As a piece of pomegranate are thy temples within thy locks.
There are three score queens and four score concubines, and virgins without number.
My dog went and defined us but one. She is the only one of her mother.
She is the choice one of her that bare her. The daughters saw her and blessed her.
Gave the queens and the concubines, and they praised her.
Who wish she that looketh forth as the morning, fair as the moon, clear as the sun,
and terrible as an army with banners?
I went down into the garden of nuts to see the fruits of the valley,
and to see why the divine flourished and the pomegranates abutted.
Wherever I was aware, my soul made me like the chariots of Abminadab.
Return, return, O Shulamite, return, return, that we may look upon thee.
What will ye see in the Shulamite, as it were the company of two armies?
Bless the really of God's word, let us pray.
Lord God, in heaven we thank you, Lord, for this day it is given to us.
I pray that you would bless the Lord for this day.
Give us good weather for our soul, winning, and fellowship later on.
I pray that you would also bless the preacher and the preaching of your word, Lord, this day.
We love you, Jesus, and we pray. Amen.
Alright, we're in Song of Solomon, chapter 6.
We have three more chapters in this book, and let's just start here at verse number 1.
Actually, let me read verse 1 real quickly.
It says, Whither is thy beloved gone, O thou fairest among women?
Whither is thy beloved turned aside, that we may seek him with thee?
Now, if you remember from last week's sermon, chapter 5 was really about her.
At the beginning, she has kind of like this nightmare, which she tells to the daughters of Jerusalem.
She's kind of feeling a bit down.
She's not upset at her husband, just very emotional about it.
And then all of a sudden, the daughters of Jerusalem ask her,
you know, what is so great about your husband?
And she goes on and praises him the rest of the chapter.
So verse 1 of chapter 6 ties together with chapter 5.
The reaction of the daughters of Jerusalem is they're like, well, let us help you find him.
He sounds really great, right?
Verse number 2, My beloved has gone down into his garden, to the beds of spices,
to feed in the gardens and to gather lilies.
So in verse number 2, what you notice is it's not that she doesn't know where her husband is.
It's just she wants to be around him.
Because in verse 2, she says this is where he is. He's gone down into his garden.
She is aware of where her husband is, approximately.
It's just she misses him, and she's saying, if you happen to see him, let him know this.
But she is aware of where he actually is, because she says he's gone down into his garden,
to the beds of spices, to feed in the gardens and to gather lilies.
Now, one thing we can take away from this verse is it's important for husbands and wives
to be aware of where their spouse is.
Some people have this idea, well, I don't like anybody knowing where I am or what I'm doing.
That's actually not really a biblical thing.
If you're a husband and you start walking out the door and your wife's like, where are you headed?
It's none of your business.
It's like you're asking for problems in your life.
Or if your wife's walking out the door and then you're like, hey, where are you headed?
And she's like, hey, I'm just doing my own thing.
It's kind of like that's going to cause problems.
It's not a healthy thing in marriage.
Look, as husbands, you ought to be able to be aware of where your wife is, and vice versa.
Wives should be able to be aware of where their husbands are.
That's what you see in this verse.
Now, why is that important?
Well, number one, you know what, it's beneficial on both sides.
As an example, why is it important for my wife to know where I am?
Well, for me, it's beneficial.
You say, why? It's a safety check.
It keeps you from doing something stupid.
It's accountability.
Accountability is a good thing for all of us.
And of course, we know we're accountable to God.
But look, when you have an accountability on earth or somebody you have to answer to,
it prevents you from getting into foolishness.
Accountability is good in our lives.
Right?
Having that prevents you from doing something you're going to regret.
So it's actually beneficial to me if my wife is aware of what I'm doing and where I'm going.
It's also beneficial to her because, think about this,
the Bible speaks about the spirit of jealousy that can come upon someone.
And look, this can happen to husbands or to wives,
where basically you get jealous and maybe there's nothing to be jealous about,
but it kind of takes over and you get very mad about it.
Right?
And so look, for both husbands and wives,
it is good that your spouse knows what you're doing and where you're going.
Right?
And look, I know people have this idea, well, you know, I like to have freedom.
I don't want to have to answer to anyone.
But when you get married, two become one.
You're meant to be one.
You're not supposed to be hiding secrets from anybody.
Right?
My wife has access to my Facebook.
And you say, Brother Stuckey, why do you allow her to have that?
I'm not hiding anything.
But see, and I'm not planning to hide anything, but the fact that she has access,
it's like, well, you better believe you're not going to do something.
Right?
Because you know there's accountability there.
Right?
And although we should be afraid of God, oftentimes we're not afraid of God,
but we're afraid of man.
We're afraid of man finding out about something.
Well, having accountability is actually a good thing for us.
Right?
My wife knows.
She knows the password's on my phone, my computer.
You know, she has access to any of that information.
I'm not hiding anything, so I don't have to be worried about anything.
That's actually a good safety check for me to keep me accountable.
And it's good for my wife because the spirit of jealousy won't come upon her.
Right?
It's good for all of us to have that sort of accountability in life.
Verse 3.
I am my beloved's, and my beloved is mine.
He feedeth among the lilies.
You know, she has confidence here in this verse.
I belong to my husband.
He belongs to me.
And part of it is the fact that she's aware of where her husband is
and what he's doing.
She says he's feeding among the lilies.
Right?
He's down in his garden.
Verse 4.
Thou art beautiful, O my love, as Tirzah,
comely as Jerusalem, terrible as an army with banners.
So it says she's beautiful.
Comely is another word for beautiful.
The word terrible means something a bit different today
than it does in the Bible.
Right?
If you think something's terrible, you think of, you know,
disgusting, awful, bad.
But in the Bible, it's more about inspiring awe.
Right?
Go to Song of Solomon, Chapter 2.
Song of Solomon, Chapter 2.
I mean, the Bible says our God is a terrible God.
Amen. Right?
But we're not saying he's bad.
Like, he's sinful.
I mean, he's not like the gods of these false religions
that are terrible gods in a different way.
Right?
But he inspires awe and respect.
Right?
And, you know, when it said terrible is an army with banners,
basically the idea is that when she walked around,
it's like people knew how much he loved his wife,
that they're basically in awe or respect of her
because of how he treated her.
It said in Song of Solomon 2, Verse 4,
He brought me to the banqueting house,
and his banner over me was love.
As I mentioned from Chapter 2, when she walked around town,
it's as if there was a banner over her that said,
Solomon loves this woman.
And when it said in Chapter 6, terrible is an army with banners,
it's kind of going back to that idea when she walked around
because everybody knew Solomon loves this woman,
it kind of put them almost in awe or respect of this woman.
Right?
Because, you know, you have to realize that many times throughout history,
a king might have a wife or even a queen,
but she's sort of like a second-class citizen to him.
It's not like he really cares about his wife.
But that's not the way it was with Solomon's wife.
Right?
When she walked around town, people knew Solomon loves this woman.
Go back to Song of Solomon, Chapter 6.
Song of Solomon 6.
Now, look, if you're someone who is very well respected
or people praise you a lot, you know,
you need to make sure that you make it a point to praise your spouse.
Right?
For example, you know, and I'll talk about this later in the sermon,
but, you know, when it comes to my wife and I,
we hold the very traditional roles in marriage
in terms of my wife staying home and raising the kids
and me being the provider.
And the reality is I get praised a lot
because people will say, you know, we enjoyed that sermon,
you know, we learned a lot,
or people message on YouTube or say,
you're doing a great job running that church.
I get praised a lot.
Right?
But the wife doesn't usually get praised
because she's usually a reflection of the son, as we said.
She's kind of in the background.
And, look, this is good advice for those that want to be a preacher
or pastor one day.
You need to make sure in the ministry
because it can be very, you know, depressing or stressful
on both the husband and the wife.
Make sure that you're praising your wife for the work she's doing.
And you say, why, Brother Stuckey?
Because, you know what, I go through a lot of stresses
when it comes to running the churches,
but I get praised, so it kind of balances out.
But for the wife, they go through stresses,
but they don't necessarily get praised for a lot of the things they do.
So you need to make sure that you remember that.
Song of Solomon, chapter 6, verse 5.
It says, turn away thine eyes from me, for they have overcome me.
And the idea they have overcome me is basically when he looked at his wife,
he's just thinking, man, my wife is so beautiful
and he could not contain himself.
Turn away thine eyes from me, for they have overcome me.
And that kind of goes back to the idea
that you should marry somebody that you find very attractive.
Marry somebody that you have, you know,
an intense passion and desire for.
Yes, of course, marry someone who's a believer
and is saved and believes in soul winning and the right doctrine,
but you ought to be very attracted to the person you're married to.
We need to have a proper balance on things
because sometimes people can get so into the Christian side
that they disregard actually caring about the person you're married to.
But, you know, marriage is not simply a checklist.
They're saved, I'm saved, they're a soul winner, I'm a soul winner,
let's just get this done.
Right? If that's what you do, you know,
you're going to probably have a miserable marriage.
And honestly, it's not fair to the person you marry
if you're not actually really interested in that person.
I've given this example before, you know,
before in sermons before,
but I haven't done it in the Song of Solomon
and it's just such a good example,
you've got to kind of bring it up every six months.
But my friend went to Bible college at Hiles Anderson College
and there was a guy who was teaching one of the classes
and he was talking about marriage and things like that.
So you can kind of compare his advice versus mine
because it's very different.
And he basically stood up in front of the class
and he was talking about how when you get married,
it's about marrying somebody who loves God.
Right? And I agree with that.
But then he said, you know, he asked his wife to come up to the front
and he had his wife come up, right?
And then all of a sudden he said, let me just explain this to you.
He said, I am not attracted to this woman.
And he said that in front of the class.
I am not attracted to this woman, but she's the godliest woman I know.
It's just like, I don't even know how you answer that.
Like, who could be that dumb? Right?
But honestly, when you're reading the Song of Solomon,
does that really seem like the advice the Bible's giving?
Where basically looks mean absolutely nothing,
it's just about, you know, are they saved?
Do they love God?
Right? Look, here's the reality.
And you can call me shallow if you want,
but if I was not attracted to my wife, I wouldn't have married her.
And look, and anyone who's going to be hyper-spiritual and say,
well, that's not the way I feel.
Look, anyone married realizes this is true.
I mean, you marry someone you're attracted to.
You marry someone you enjoy spending time with.
And if you don't, why are you marrying them?
You're better off just staying single, right?
But what he says is, turn away thine eyes for me,
for they have overcome me.
I mean, he's very attracted to his spouse.
It says in, and let me also say this on a side point,
because, you know, obviously when people are single,
they're oftentimes really excited to try to get married,
and maybe they'll talk to various different people.
You know, if somebody talks to someone or is interested,
and it doesn't work out,
and like a couple days later they move on to somebody else,
you know what that tells you?
They weren't interested in that person.
I mean, if you just quickly go from one person to the next,
where basically you talk to them, you're really interested,
you really like them,
and then a week later, just no interest whatsoever,
what it says is you really didn't like that first person.
Right?
And look, if somebody's just bouncing around,
what that's basically telling you is they just want to be married.
That's what it's saying.
That's not fair to the person you marry.
If you're just like, I just want to be married to someone,
that's strange in my opinion.
It's like you ought to marry someone you actually really enjoy,
someone you enjoy spending time with, you're attracted to them,
and if you go from being interested in one person,
it doesn't work out, and then a week later,
you're just really into somebody else.
You're in love with that person in January,
in love with this person in February,
in love with this person in March.
There's something wrong with you, right?
What it's called is you just want to say I do and be married,
but you're not actually interested in the person that you're marrying.
That is not fair to the person that you actually marry, right?
Verse number five.
Turn away thine eyes for me, for they have overcome me.
Thy hair is as a flock of goats that appear from Gilead.
Now, I'm going to assume that Gilead had the best goats, right?
They had the best hair.
I mean, you've got to be very careful in these examples.
When I see my wife coming, I see that goat coming, I just think.
Right?
I'm assuming that the hair of the goats of Gilead was very precious,
valuable, very nice.
I'm assuming is the reference.
Obviously, she understands this reference,
though I don't think any of us really do understand this reference.
Verse six.
Thy teeth are as a flock of sheep which go up from the washing,
whereof everyone beareth twins, and there is not one barren among them.
And I'm not sure if I fully understand this verse,
but part of this is he's just saying his wife's teeth are white,
because he says, which go up from the washing.
And so basically, as a flock of sheep,
well, sheeps are white after they're washed, right?
What he's stating is his wife's teeth are very white, okay?
Verse seven.
As a piece of a pomegranate are thy temples within thy locks.
Verse eight.
Now, verse eight is a verse that people get very confused on.
It says here, there are three-score queens and four-score concubines
and virgins without number.
Now, the way most people hear this verse is that Solomon says there's
three-score queens, and he's basically talking about his harem
of all of these women that he's married to.
Now, as I've stated, I do not believe that Solomon was interested
in other women at this time, okay?
I believe this is the only woman that he's with.
But let me just explain to you why this verse does not mean
that he had 60, you know, queen wives.
A king only has one queen, right?
I mean, even if a king's married to multiple women,
there's only one queen.
You don't have 20 queens at the same time or 60 queens at the same time.
So he's not saying, hey, you know what?
I got 60 queen wives, but you're the best queen wife, right?
You only have one queen at a time just like you only have one king.
So when he's saying there are three-score queens,
he's not stating that he has 60 queen wives.
I do think what he's stating is he's saying 60 queens,
80 concubines, and virgins without number.
I do think he's referencing to various women who would be married
to various kings probably, queens, concubine wives,
and virgins that might be promised to kings.
But here's the thing about this.
The reason why this would make sense, what he's saying,
is because assuming this is Pharaoh's daughter,
she's met a lot of queens in her life.
She's met a lot of women that were married to kings.
And quite honestly, to a lot of women,
it might be a bit intimidating to being married to the king.
See, there's a lot of women that would probably be excited
to be married to the king.
There's a lot of women that would not want to be married to a king.
They'd rather just kind of live a low-key life away from the spotlight.
I mean, there's people that have different personalities.
And to her, you know, honestly,
it could have been intimidating to her to marry the king,
and he's trying to make her feel special because she probably knows
all these queens that are very beautiful,
all these concubine wives and virgins without number.
But he's stating to her, you know what?
You're better than any of them, right?
Basically stating, yes, you know what?
I could have married a lot of different people.
I'm not interested in them.
He's not stating, here are all my wives, but I like you the most.
He's stating, no, no, no.
You're better than all the other queens out there,
all the other women that are married to kings, right?
Three-score queens and four-score concubines
and virgins without number.
My dove, my undefiled, is but one.
She is the only one of her mother.
She is the choice one of her that bear her.
And what he's stating is, you know what?
You are the favorite child of your mom, and you're the best.
No one compares to you.
It says, the daughters saw her and blessed her,
yea, the queens and the concubines, and they praised her.
Now let's just say for a second that I'm wrong on verse 8.
Let us just say that all of these concubines and virgins and queens
are basically Solomon's wives and his harem or whatever.
Let me ask you a question.
Do you think that if two women were married to the same man,
they would be praising one another?
Do you see Rachel praising Leah a lot in the Bible?
Do you really see Leah praising Rachel a lot?
I mean, if you're competing for the same guy, right,
you're not going to be praising, you know, basically your competition, right?
So when it's saying the queens and the concubines, they praised her,
what is it saying?
Well, it's saying that she's met a lot of queens in her life,
she's met a lot of royalty and famous people,
and she had a good reputation.
She was well-liked, right?
I mean, if they were married to the same guy,
they would not be praising one another, okay?
That doesn't make any sense.
It's just stating she's met a lot of different famous women in her life,
and she had a good reputation.
If you had asked about Solomon's wife, she would have had a very good reputation.
Now go in your Bible to Proverbs 21, Proverbs chapter 21.
Look, obviously people have different personalities,
but I would just state that I would assume for a lot of women,
let's say you have this fancy banquet or whatever
and there's all of these queens and famous royalty.
Kings and queens show up and all these famous people.
It might be intimidating when you're married to the king
because you feel like you've got to be better than all of these other people,
and you might feel like you don't measure up.
And so what I believe he's doing is trying to just build up his wife's confidence,
saying, hey, I only care about you.
You're the best.
There is no comparison between all of these other women and you.
But it also speaks to the importance, because she has a good reputation,
of a person having a good attitude, okay?
If you have a bad attitude, you're not going to have a good reputation.
The Bible says in Proverbs 21, verse 9,
It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop
than with a brawling woman in a wide house.
Now what this verse is stating is,
it would be better to be like very poor,
not have anything, rather than having a large house,
and you're always...
Proverbs 25.
I mean, it's better to hang out up in the attic where it's like 40 degrees
and you're sweating, sleeping on the floor with a rock as your pillow,
than basically be in a nice bed with your wife if you're fighting all the time.
That's what the Bible is stating.
And obviously these things can go both ways.
I mean, I'm sure that if a wife was around her husband
and he's always mad and angry and everything,
it's not going to be very pleasant either.
It says in Proverbs 25, verse 24,
It is better to dwell in the corner of the housetop
than with a brawling woman in a wide house.
So it pretty much says the exact same thing as it said in that earlier verse.
Now, let me just state this.
Men and women are different.
And turn back to Song of Solomon 6.
Men and women are different, obviously.
And I don't shy away from expressing how men and women are different,
not just in terms of how they look, but personalities.
And I believe there are certain things that men are better at
and certain things that they're worse at.
Certain things men might be more spiritual
and certain things that they're less spiritual.
In my opinion, I would state that men have more of a tendency
to maybe lose their temper.
Something gets on their nerves and they just kind of yell
or lash out in anger.
At least I would say for me personally,
it's like that could be a weakness I have
where if I get mad, I can just kind of get really angry out of nowhere.
I'd say most guys, this is kind of the way you are.
You say you want proof of that.
I mean, just watch guys playing a basketball game.
There's an argument, who did the ball go out of bounds on,
and all of a sudden, boom, they're just fighting and hating one another.
But with women, what the Bible is trying to give you a tendency to let you know
is that women can have a tendency to be the complaining
or murmuring person all the time,
like the agitator.
The expression of the nagging wife is what the Bible is stating.
Look, I don't believe anybody should get offended by what I'm saying now
because I just read verses from the Bible
and I stated that men also can lose their temper and have a bad attitude.
I'm just stating both husbands and wives should have a good attitude.
If you have a bad attitude around your spouse,
they're not going to want to be around you.
Look, if I was always fighting with my wife,
I wouldn't want to be around her.
If my wife's always fighting with me, she's not going to want to be around me.
Because think about it.
Last week we talked about the importance of friendship in marriage.
The people that I was close friends with before I was married,
I didn't fight with them.
If I always fought with them and argued with them,
I wouldn't want to be around them.
See, the people that are your friends are the people you enjoy hanging out with.
And yeah, you know what, we understand people can get mad at one another,
but you kind of get over it.
It's not something where every single day you're always fighting.
If you're always fighting with someone who's your friend,
you should be friends with them.
If you're always arguing and getting mad.
And see, the problem is that oftentimes in marriage,
people are fighting and fighting and fighting.
Well, of course you're not friends if you're fighting all the time.
And so there's importance of just having a good attitude.
Being kind with the things you say, not being rude, complimenting.
Very, very basic marriage advice.
Not complicated, but this is what the Bible states.
And if you do these simple little things,
it's going to give you a lot of problems in the long run.
Psalm and Solomon, chapter 6.
And let me also state this.
Obviously, it could be a husband's not spending time with his wife,
or a wife's not spending time with her husband because of laziness or whatever.
But there also could be a reason.
If a husband never wants to spend time with his wife,
maybe because he doesn't enjoy spending time with her,
because he doesn't want to fight.
Or if a wife doesn't want to spend time with her husband,
maybe it's because they fight all the time.
It's like, I'd rather just watch this sport on TV
because at least I'm not getting in an argument.
Right? It's like, look, if your spouse never wants to spend any time with you,
there's something wrong.
And I'm not stating it's necessarily your fault,
but I'm saying you ought to have an honest conversation with your spouse
and figure it out.
Because you should want to spend time with the person you're married to.
You should want to have this friendship.
There's a connection you can have with your spouse
in terms of being your friend that you cannot have with other people.
Things that you can talk to them about.
And if you do not have that, there's something wrong.
Something that you need to fix.
Psalm and Solomon 6, verse number 8.
There are three-score queens and four-score concubines
and virgins without number.
My dove, my undefiled, is but one.
She is the only one of her mother.
She is the choice one of her to bear her.
What we see there at the first half of verse 9
is he's praising and complimenting his wife.
Then it says the daughters saw her and blessed her.
They blessed and praised Solomon's wife.
He had the queens and the concubines and they praised her.
So Solomon's wife had a good reputation and people praised her.
People said nice things about her.
Obviously all of us should have that sort of reputation
amongst people that people like us.
People do not dislike us.
But I want you to think about this.
Chapter 5 is about the wife praising her husband.
Chapter 6 is the husband praising his wife.
But let's say they never praise one another.
Let's say Solomon and his wife never praised one another,
never thanked them for anything.
They just did not do that.
But Solomon's always getting praised by other people.
And Solomon's wife is always getting praised by other people.
Look, how would you feel if everyone always praises you
but never your spouse?
Right?
Think about this.
As I said, I get a lot of praises from people
for sermons and things like that.
I appreciate it when people mean it and they say,
hey, we enjoyed that sermon and stuff like that.
But imagine if you're getting praises
and then your spouse never praises you.
Imagine if a wife's getting compliments from everybody.
Everyone's saying, wow, you look really great in that dress.
But the husband never says that.
And look, here's the reality.
There's never an excuse for seeking love somewhere else.
But let's just use common sense.
If your husband never praises you
or if your wife never praises you
and you get praised by somebody else all the time,
you might end up seeking happiness elsewhere.
It doesn't justify it.
It's wrong.
But let's use common sense.
But if you're always praising your spouse
and thanking them and saying how great they are,
they're not going to seek anything elsewhere
because you made them feel special.
But everyone's always praising them.
You go off to your secular job,
you're at the office,
and there's some woman that's always praising you.
And then you come home,
and right when you open the door,
your wife's like, oh, you did this and this and this.
It's just like, let's just use common sense.
Look, we need to make it a point.
It sounds very basic.
And it is very basic.
But it's not that hard to say,
hey, you look really pretty in that dress.
You look really nice in that shirt.
Thank you for taking out the trash.
Thank you for making breakfast or whatever.
Basic small things.
But you know what?
If you do those basic small things in marriage,
people are not going to seek happiness elsewhere.
Verse number 10.
Who is she that looketh forth as the morning,
fair as the moon, clear as the sun,
and terrible as an army with banners?
I went down into the garden of nuts
to see the fruits of the valley,
to see whether the vine flourished
and the pomegranate spotted,
or ever I was aware,
my soul made me like the chariots of Amenadab.
Return, return, O Shulamite,
return, return, that we may look upon thee.
Now, verse 13 is very similar to verse 1.
Is that almost just like a verse
that just kind of lines up exactly like verse 1?
Because in verse 1, what does it say?
Whither's thy beloved gone, O thou fairest among women?
Whither's thy beloved turned aside,
that we may seek him with thee?
When she praises her husband,
the reaction of people is like,
wow, this guy's a great guy.
When he praises his wife in chapter 6,
what's the reaction in verse 13?
Return, return, O Shulamite,
return, return, that we may look upon thee.
And so basically, as she praises him,
people think highly of him.
As he praises her,
people think highly of her.
So look, if you would compliment your spouse,
it would cause people to think very highly of your spouse.
And you ought to want people to think well of your spouse.
I should have the reaction in my mind,
I want people to think,
man, Brother Stuckey is lucky to be married to that woman.
My wife ought to have the idea that basically,
I want people to think, man,
I'm lucky to be married to Brother Stuckey.
Right? You want to speak well,
you should want to speak well about your spouse,
and if you would both do that,
you know what, it would make both of you look better.
It would give both of you a good reputation.
Now go to Luke 17.
Luke 17.
And I'll finish that verse as your turn to Luke 17.
It said, what will you see in the Shulamite,
as it were the company of two armies?
So chapters five and six are very much about
the importance of praising your spouse.
And let me talk to you a little bit about this
because some people can have
a bit of a wrong perspective on things.
Okay?
For example, as I said, in my marriage,
we hold the very traditional values
of me the one making the money
and my wife raising the kids.
And you know, I understand not everybody's in that situation,
but it's the easiest to explain
so people kind of get an idea.
Between my wife and I, we have very different roles, okay,
in terms of what I do versus what she does.
And you know what, my wife could look at me and say,
well, my husband, you know, he's going out there
and making money and providing for the family.
I'm never going to thank him for it, though,
because it's his job.
And that's true.
It is my job.
It is my job to make money and provide for the family.
That's the role that I have, right?
But my wife can have the attitude,
I'm never going to thank my husband
for doing what he's supposed to do.
Or I could look at my wife and, you know,
she makes breakfast.
I'm not going to thank her.
It's her job, right?
I mean, people could have that attitude.
But that's a very dumb and foolish attitude, okay?
Let me show you in Luke 17.
Luke 17, verse 7.
But which of you having a servant plowing
or feeding cattle will say unto him by and by
when he has come from the field,
go and sit down to meet,
and will not rather say unto him,
make ready wherewith I may sup and gird thyself
and serve me till I have eaten and drunken,
and afterward thou shalt eat and drink.
Verse 9.
Doth he thank that servant because he did the things
that were commanded him?
I tro not.
So likewise ye, when ye shall have done
all those things which are commanded,
you say, we are unprofitable servants.
We have done that which is our duty to do.
The purpose of this passage is that we get the mindset
that no matter what we do, it was our duty, okay?
No matter how much you go soul winning,
it's your duty to go soul winning.
No matter how much you read the Bible,
it's your duty to read the Bible.
No matter how much you pray, it's your duty to pray, right?
No matter how much you do of anything spiritual,
it's like, well, I mean, that's what God commanded you.
You're supposed to do that.
That doesn't mean that God doesn't thank us
for the work we do, though.
The Bible speaks about people
that the world was not worthy of.
I mean, that's a pretty high level of praise.
God speaks about people that were his friends.
I mean, God is actually praising them,
even though all that Moses did is what he was supposed to do.
He didn't do anything above and beyond.
He just did what he was told to do, right?
Anything that any one of us do, it's our duty to do for God.
Well, when it comes to marriage,
me going out and working and providing and making money,
it's like, you know what?
I should have the attitude, that's my duty.
That's my job.
I'm not going to give myself a pat on the back
for doing what I'm supposed to do.
But here's the thing.
It means a lot to me when my wife says,
thank you very much for working hard to provide for the family.
Now, I should have the attitude inside of me,
I'm doing what I'm supposed to do.
But the compliments still help you.
My wife should have the attitude
when she's taking care of the kids and cleaning.
Hey, I'm just doing what I'm supposed to do.
But here's the thing.
When you get that thank you from your spouse, it means a lot.
Think about going to a job.
Your boss gives you a really hard assignment.
It takes you a week to do, you finish the assignment,
you turn it in, and then your boss just takes it
and doesn't say anything.
Now, here's the thing.
You did what you were paid to do.
You're not getting paid to hear a thank you from your boss.
But here's the thing.
Doesn't it bother you if you work really hard on something
and your boss doesn't say anything?
You're thinking, I spent like a week on this
and my boss doesn't say anything?
And look, I've had bosses on both sides of the spectrum.
I've had bosses that would yell at you
for every little mistake that you make.
And I've had bosses that will praise you
when you do something that they ask you to do.
You know which boss I like working for?
The one that praises me when I do something he asks me to do.
Because there's some bosses, you work for them,
they will make it a big point if you make a mistake.
I've been yelled at by bosses before,
and I think it is such a minor mistake.
It's like, you've got to be kidding me.
I'm getting yelled at.
I'm trying my best.
He never thanks me and he just yells at me all the time.
Well, you don't really want to work hard for that boss, do you?
You're thinking, I'm going to start applying for jobs elsewhere.
But when you have a boss that praises you,
you want to work hard for them.
Well, let's just use some common sense in marriage.
Yeah, you know what?
Maybe you're just doing your duty
and you shouldn't want to thank me.
You should have the attitude,
hey, this is just my job.
But here's the thing,
that thank you goes a long way to motivate you, doesn't it?
And look, as a guy,
make it a point to praise your wife for the stuff she's doing.
Well, that's her duty to do.
Well, you're an idiot if you think by being a jerk to her
it's going to help.
If you're actually kind and thank her for the stuff she is doing,
it's going to make her want to do it more.
Same thing with husbands.
You say, well, it's his job to provide the money.
You should still thank him for going out and working hard.
And look, I'm using various examples.
Obviously in marriage there's various roles
and various lines on things,
but it's like I'm the one who will fix things around the house
when they're broken.
And I look at that as it's my job to do.
I'm not particularly good at fixing things,
but I know it's my job.
If someone gets electrocuted, it's going to be me.
But here's the thing.
When my wife thanks me for fixing something,
it means a lot.
And look, even though you might have specific roles
and you might be doing what's only your duty,
you should still praise your spouse when they're doing something,
even if it's what they're supposed to do.
You say, why?
Because it's called just wise leadership, being kind.
It's going to cause them to want to do a better job.
Turn your Bible to Matthew 25.
Matthew 25.
So look, whether you're a guy or a girl in here,
obviously in every marriage you have various roles
and responsibilities of things that you do.
Look, whatever you do that you're supposed to do,
you should be doing it with the attitude it's my job.
I'm not doing it to get credit.
I'm not doing it to get thanked.
I'm just doing it because it's my job.
But at the same time, you know what,
the system would say you praise your spouse when they do something,
even if it's what it's their duty to do.
Now, in a similar way, and I fail at this a lot,
I can say when it comes to running a church,
it's like many people at our church volunteer for things.
They take on ministries.
And you know what?
I don't always do a good enough job thanking people for the work they do
because look, our church has grown a lot
if you've been here from the beginning.
We had Sundays where,
and today is actually a low day at church,
and this would have been a record attendance in the past, right?
I mean, we had Sundays where there was less than 30 people at church,
and it was a slow growth.
It felt like, man, you know, we weren't really growing.
We've had a slow and steady growth.
It's not just because I'm preaching sermons
or because of me and my wife.
It's because everybody's volunteering.
It's a team effort when it comes to a church,
whether you be the eye, the nose, or the ear.
And as I said, I don't always do a good enough job to thank you,
but I do want to say thank you to everyone who's volunteering and helping.
You're making this a great place.
And our church has really grown,
and I believe it's going to continue to grow.
It's not just based on one person.
It's a team effort, right?
Now, of course, you should have the attitude,
well, I'm doing what's my duty,
but at the same time, wisdom would say,
if you praise someone for what they're doing,
it's going to make them want to do a better job, right?
We should take this mentality, whether it's in marriage,
whether it's in work, whether it's church or whatever,
for thanking people for the stuff they're doing,
even if it's just their duty.
Matthew 25.
And I want to show you that we had the passage on Luke 17,
but the idea in that passage is we should get the mindset,
I'm just doing my duty.
But God still thanks people for the stuff they do.
Matthew 25 verse 20.
And so he that had received five talents came and brought other five talents,
saying, Lord, thou deliverest on me five talents.
Behold, I have gained beside them five talents more.
His Lord said unto him, Well done, thou good and faithful servant.
Thou spent faithful over a few things.
I will make thee rule over many things.
Enter thou into the joy of thy Lord.
He also that had received two talents came and said,
Lord, thou deliverest on me two talents.
Behold, I have gained two other talents beside them.
His Lord said unto him, Well done, good and faithful servant.
Thou spent faithful over a few things.
I will make thee rule over many things.
Enter thou into the joy of thy Lord.
And look, I do believe that if you serve God in your life
and you get a lot of great rewards,
I don't believe God's going to tell you,
you know what, you could have done a lot more.
Right?
Now, truly, that's accurate, right?
He could say to any one of us, it's like, man,
you spent a lot of time wasted on stupid things.
It's like you could have done so much more.
You could have read the Bible more.
You could have got more souls saved.
I don't think he's going to do that to those that are trying to faithfully serve him.
We fail. We make mistakes.
We are unprofitable servants at the end of the day
because we're just doing our duty, but I believe he's going to say,
Well done, thou good and faithful servant.
That ought to be the goal of every Christian that God would say, Well done.
Right? Look at all the rewards that this person got.
And look, I do believe that's God's mentality
because he talks about people the world is not worthy of.
He calls people his friends.
Even though they're just doing their duty, what they're required to do.
Now go in your Bible to Proverbs 31.
Proverbs 31.
Proverbs 31 verse 28.
And this is of course the chapter on the virtuous woman.
And notice what it says in verse 28 here.
Proverbs 31 verse 28.
Her children arise up and call her blessed.
Her husband also and he praises her.
Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excel'st them all.
Favors deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.
Give her the fruit of her hands and let her own works praise her in the gates.
And obviously, you know what?
This can't necessarily be said for every marriage
because you know what?
Obviously people are married to different people,
but the general idea I believe when it says he's praising her
is that you know what?
If you are a virtuous wife, a virtuous woman,
I believe it's going to cause a reaction of your husband saying thank you
and praising you for what you're doing.
Obviously you'd expect a virtuous woman,
if someone like Ruth is going to look for a virtuous guy to marry,
and if you marry a virtuous person,
they're going to probably have enough wisdom to thank their spouse
when they do something good.
But the reaction of him here is he's praising his wife.
Now what is he praising his wife for?
Her duty.
Proverbs 31 is just speaking about the virtuous woman
and just doing what she's supposed to do.
But he's praising her for it.
You say, why? He's not an idiot.
Number one, he's probably very thankful.
If your wife's a virtuous wife, you're going to be thankful.
And number two, he's wise enough to realize
that yeah, it's just her duty to do,
but you know what? I really appreciate it.
It's helpful. I want her to keep doing it.
And it's just like, you know what?
If you want your spouse to be motivated,
you ought to give them a reason.
You ought to thank them and praise them for the stuff that they're doing.
And it said at the end of verse 31,
Let her own works praise her in the gates.
So because he praises her and talks how great she is,
the result is that people speak well of her also, right?
And look, I can say that, you know,
obviously I think both husbands and wives can do a better job of this.
You know, I think all of us could say,
I could look at this and say, you know what? I'm not perfect at this.
I definitely fail at this oftentimes.
But you know what? It's like, you know,
you need to make it a point to do the small little things
that will go a long way.
I mean, it sounds very basic.
You know, you think, well, you know, it's no big deal.
My wife cooked breakfast or whatever.
You know, but it's not really that big of a deal to say thank you, right?
Or if you want to use as few words as possible, salamat.
There's only one word that's got to come out of your mouth.
But it's more syllables, okay, than thank you.
So you've got to figure out what's more important, okay?
But it's just like it doesn't really take that much effort.
And look, honestly, what's amazing about this book,
because I love this book, but it's like all of this stuff is so basic,
and yet I think that we could all say looking at this book,
you know, honestly, we probably all failed at a lot of these things.
But if you did these things in marriage,
all of us would have strong marriages, just small little things.
Praise your spouse. Speak well of them.
You know, put in effort. Spend time together.
Treat them as your friends.
Small little things like this go a long way to having a good marriage.
Let's go to a word of prayer.
Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for allowing us to be here today
and ask you to help all of us in this room that are married.
Help us just to do our best job to be good husbands and good wives,
and I think all of us can do a better job.
Obviously we're all sinners. We make mistakes.
But help all of us just try to increase and strengthen our marriages
and do a better job at some of these things, even if they've slipped before God.
I also ask you to help prepare these people that are still looking for a spouse, God.
Help them to find the right person.
Help them to find someone that they are very attracted to and enjoy spending time with,
but obviously love you as well, God, and help them to have strong marriages as well.
In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.
Amen. For our last song, let's turn to hymn number 270.
Hymn number 270.
Just as I am.
Hymn number 270.
Just as I am, without one plea.
On the first ready, sing.
Just as I am, without one plea.
But that my God was shed for me,
and that thou be its begum,
to thee, O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Just as I am, and waiting not to reap my soul of one dark pot,
to thee whose blood enclaves its blood, O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Just as I am, though tossed about with many a calling,
many a doubt, my peace and fears within,
without, O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Just as I am, for wretched time,
sight reaches healing of the mind,
Yea, O I need indeed to find, O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
For the last verse, we're gonna sing it acapella.
All together, on the last, sing.
Just as I am, thou wilt receive,
will welcome, pardon, cleanse, relieve,
because thy promise, I believe, O Lamb of God, I come, I come.
Brother G, can you pray for us?
Amen.