Genesis chapter 20, hold on one second, Genesis chapter 20, Genesis chapter 20, and as I mentioned
during the introduction, the second sermon I decided to just postpone to next week, and
so I'm preaching a different sermon here today that I wrote this week.
The name of the sermon is pregnancy in light of the Bible.
Pregnancy in light of the Bible.
Now let me say this, when it comes to preaching the Word of God, you want to preach sermons
that are applicable and edifying and helpful to the people that you preach to, and you
know as a church we're very thankful that God over the last year has blessed as many
babies have been born and we have many first time moms expecting children, and so the Word
of God we believe teaches all topics, right?
I mean the Word of God gives us information on everything.
Now studying and preparing the sermon, what I noticed is there's a lot of verses that
are kind of standalone verses on the topic of pregnancy, and when you combine them all
together, there's actually a lot of information, okay?
Now let me say this, when it comes to this topic, this is not going to be a sermon where
I say, well this is why you should have your baby born in a hospital, or this is why you
should have your baby born with a midwife, or this is why you should have a pediatrician,
this is why you should not have a pediatrician, this is why you should get this vaccine, this
is why you should not get this vaccine.
That's completely outside the scope of this sermon, okay?
I'm going to show you just directly what the Bible says, and then you can make the applications
that you believe are appropriate according to the Word of God, okay?
Now let me also say that this can be a very sensitive topic to preach on, and quite honestly,
this is going to be one of the most difficult sermons I've ever preached, okay?
This can be very sensitive to a lot of different people, and so it's a very difficult subject,
so let me just apologize in advance if I don't quite say things perfectly, or if I
could have worded things a bit better.
I understand this is a very sensitive topic, but I also believe it's the job of church
to be the pillar and ground of the truth, and to teach on all subjects the Bible actually
talks about, and look, whenever the Word of God is preached, whether you're an expecting
mom or an expecting father, look, you can still be edified from the Word of God.
There is a lot of great information to learn.
Let me also say this before we start the sermon, and when it comes to the Bible, the
Bible doesn't use the word pregnant, okay?
The Bible will always say that women are with child.
Now the reason why the Bible says that is because life begins at conception according
to the Word of God.
Now I wish we had kept that terminology as a nation and as a people because of the fact
that disproves abortion right there.
That shows abortion is murder because the Bible always says that when a woman is going
to be having a child, she is with child.
Not that she will give birth to a child in nine months, but that she is with child because
life begins at conception, okay?
Now this sermon is going to be broken into three points.
Point number one is going to be pre-pregnancy.
Point number two is going to be during pregnancy.
Point number three is post-pregnancy, okay?
Point number one for pre-pregnancy, when it comes to pregnancy or being with child, the
Bible teaches that God has the power to open and to close a wound.
God has the power to give you a child or to decide not to give you a child, okay?
Genesis 20, notice what it says in verse 17.
In this story, God is angry at Abimelech and his people because Abraham is guilty of lying
about his wife and saying, she's just my sister, but Abimelech could have committed
a major sin.
So notice what it says in verse 17.
So Abraham prayed unto God and God healed Abimelech and his wife.
It says he healed Abimelech because of the fact none of the women were able to have children.
And see, the Bible says children are a heritage of the Lord.
They are a blessing, the Bible says.
It's a good thing to have children.
It's a good thing to be a mom.
It's a good thing to be a father.
It's a good thing to have a family, okay?
It says God healed Abimelech and his wife and his maidservants and they bear children.
For the Lord had fast, notice this, closed up all the wounds of the house of Abimelech
because of Sarah, Abraham's wife.
So notice in Genesis 20 verse 18, the Bible says that God closed up the wounds.
He prevented any of them from having children.
Why?
Because he was angry with them, okay?
Now turn to Genesis 29, Genesis 29, Genesis 29.
Let me also say this up front and I'll talk about it throughout the sermon, but look,
if a woman is not having a child and she's trying, that does not mean she's in sin.
That does not mean the husband's in sin.
I mean, yes, it could be God decided to close up the womb for that reason, but it could
also be a number of things.
And look, Sarah was a godly lady in the Bible and it took her a long time to have a child.
So don't have this attitude or this judgment on other people and say, well, this is the
reason why you don't have a child, okay?
That's ridiculous.
For any topic, that's ridiculous.
It's wicked.
And let me tell you something.
You know what?
If you don't know what to say, either don't say anything or just say, hey, I'm praying
for you, okay?
You will not go wrong if you say that.
Now, Genesis 29, verse 30, and he went in also unto Rachel and he loved also Rachel
more than Leah and served with him yet seven other years.
And when the Lord saw that Leah was hated, he opened her womb, but Rachel was barren.
The Bible says that God opened the womb of Leah.
He allowed her to have a child.
And the reason why is because Jacob loved his other wife, Rachel, more than Leah.
And God said, I'm going to bless Leah with a child because of the fact her husband doesn't
really appreciate her.
And inside of the heart of a woman is to have a child and to be a mom.
The Bible teaches that.
And God says, you know what?
I am going to bless her because of the fact she doesn't really have a husband that cares
about her that much.
I'm going to bless her with a child, okay?
Turn to Genesis 30, Genesis 30.
And look, this is throughout the Bible, I'm just showing you a few verses in Genesis,
but throughout the Bible, it talks about God opening wombs, closing them.
It talks about him closing up the wombs of a whole nation that's in sin and things such
as that.
I'm just showing you a few references here.
Genesis 30 verse 22, and God remembered Rachel, Genesis 30 verse 22, and God remembered Rachel
and God hearkened to her and opened her womb.
And she conceived and bare a son and said, God hath taken away my reproach.
The Bible says in Genesis 30 that God opened the womb of Rachel.
Now a long time period has gone by though.
They've been married for a while and Rachel does not have a child yet, even though she
wants to have a child, she wants to be a mom.
And so look, a long time period goes by.
Now some people when they get married, nine months after they're married, there comes
the baby, right?
I mean, it's like right after they get married, God blesses them and 40 weeks later, there
is the baby.
But sometimes it's a couple years, five years, 10 years.
That does not mean those people are in sin.
It does not mean that they're not right with God.
We don't know the mind of God.
We do not know the reason why they didn't have children immediately.
We should not try to play God and try to figure these things out.
Turn to Genesis 25, Genesis 25.
So underneath pre-pregnancy, we realize God can open and close the womb.
It shouldn't be surprising because can God not do anything?
Is anything too hard for the Lord?
That's what God told Abraham when referencing Sarah about the fact that she was past age
to have a child and God said, is anything too hard for the Lord?
Nothing's too hard for God.
Now another thing we need to realize about pre-pregnancy, yes, God can open and close
the womb, but at the same time, humans do have part of the responsibility in terms of
having a child.
One thing you can do if you want to have a child is to pray.
The Bible specifically states this, okay?
Genesis 25 verse 20, Genesis 25 verse 20, and Isaac was 40 years old when he took Rebecca
to wife, the daughter of Bethel, the Syrian of Padanerim, the sister to Laban, the Syrian,
and Isaac entreated the Lord for his wife.
At this time, people live longer, okay?
So 40 years is not necessarily like 40 years like we think of, okay?
And so people are able to have children at an older age and things such as that.
Women are able to go at a bit of an older age during this time period.
But Isaac is 40 years old when he gets married and it says in verse 21, he entreats the Lord
for his wife.
Entreat basically means to ask for very earnestly with great passion.
So basically he's praying to God with great passion.
This is not something where it's like, okay, I prayed this month, let me pray next month.
This is called he's spending real time every day praying and praying and praying.
God bless us with a child.
He is entreating the Lord, okay?
Then it says this, he entreats the Lord for his wife because she was barren, which means
not able to have a child, you know, her womb is not open, and the Lord was entreated of
him and Rebecca, his wife conceived.
Now when you read this, it sounds like he prays to God and God answers immediately.
Doesn't it sound like that?
Go to verse 26, verse 26, and after that came his brother out.
Now remember, Isaac was 40 when he got married.
Verse 26, and after that came his brother out and his hand took hold on Esau's heel
and his name was called Jacob and Isaac was three score years old when she bare them.
Sixty years old.
Now look, I don't know, it's not 40 years to the second and 60 years to the second and
you know, 60 years might be when the children are actually born, but roughly 20 years the
Bible is teaching us that Isaac entreated the Lord to have a child, 20 years, okay?
So look, sometimes God answers prayers, it does not mean it's coming within five minutes.
You know, you might have a major prayer in your life and you might have a season of prayer
or seasons of prayer, like Paul the Apostle who was earnestly praying, okay?
Look, in the Bible, there's no guarantee that a prayer is going to be answered immediately,
but that does not mean that God's not going to answer the prayer, because the Bible says
God answered that prayer, but for whatever reason, God said, you know what, I'm not going
to answer it immediately.
Now we don't know why that reason is.
There's nothing to indicate that they committed some major wicked sin though, okay?
It's just God decided to hold off on answering that.
So look, you know, and look, my wife and I, it's not a super long time compared to what
you see in the Bible here, but a couple years felt like a really long time, especially when
inside the heart of a woman is to be a mom and to raise kids and to have a family.
That is inside the heart of every woman.
God has placed it there.
And so look, a couple years feels like a really long time, okay?
As people, we ought to be very sensitive to other people if they're going through this.
If they want a child and it doesn't come right away, okay, be very sensitive towards them.
But for 20 years, Isaac prays, and I'm sure she was praying as well, and then God eventually
answers that prayer, okay?
Turn to Hebrews 11, Hebrews 11, Hebrews 11.
So when it comes to personal responsibility, obviously prayer is part of that.
Prayer is always part of it, okay?
But another thing the Bible actually directly mentions is that with a woman that she has
the health or the strength to actually have a child, okay?
The Bible actually mentions this in Hebrews 11, verse 11.
Notice what the Bible reads, Hebrews 11, verse 11.
Through faith also Sarah herself, notice this, received strength to conceive seed.
Now conceiving seed is the moment, you know, life begins at conception, 40 weeks before
the baby's actually born.
But she actually receives strength to actually have a child, okay?
And so when it comes to being able to have a child, there is actually health involved
of the person having a child, okay?
And so look, and I'm not going deep into this.
I mean, I'm sure a lot of moms in this church could give you advice on there's certain foods
that you can eat that have extra vitamins and things such as that.
But you know, also just, you know, being relatively healthy.
I mean, if somebody is a drunk and smoking cigarettes, they are gonna have a hard time
even conceiving, even the start of the pregnancy, much less actually giving birth, okay?
And so as a mom, you know, if you're someone who wants to have a child, then it's like,
you know, being in decent shape is actually helpful.
I'm not talking about going to the gym for a couple hours every night, okay?
And look, you know, you're welcome to review this stuff on what they say medically.
But you know, if a woman is either too thin or too heavy, it can be difficult to have
a child, okay?
And so, you know, just eating a proper diet, look, if you're eating potato chips and pop
all the time, it is gonna be more difficult to have a child because pregnancy is difficult.
And the body understands that, and the body knows that, and God knows that.
And if you're gonna have a lot of trouble with the pregnancy, then God might say, you
know what?
I wanna bless you, but it's gonna be difficult, okay?
And so there is personal responsibility because the Bible says here with Sarah, through faith,
also Sarah herself received strength to conceive seed.
Turn to 1 Samuel 1, 1 Samuel 1, 1 Samuel 1.
Now let me say this.
I cannot prove this with the Bible, but I have read from various things I've watched
and stuff that even the husband, his health does factor into whether or not you're able
to conceive a child, okay?
That if the husband is a drunk and smoking and doing drugs, it's gonna be harder to conceive
a child as well.
That even, now, the Bible directly mentions the woman, but also with the husband as well,
the lifestyle you live can affect that as well.
Now I cannot prove that with the Bible, but honestly it makes logical sense to me that
that would be the case, okay?
But we do see that with a woman, her health is part of it.
Now what about if you're an outsider?
What about if you're not the wife that is looking for a child?
How do you respond to this situation?
What if you're the husband and you're married and your wife wants to have a child and you're
praying and she's not able to have a child?
Basically you're gonna do the exact opposite of what this guy does in 1 Samuel 1, okay?
Notice verse 8, then said Elkanah her husband to her, Hannah, why weepest thou?
Why are you crying, Hannah?
And why eatest thou not?
Why aren't you eating?
And why is thy heart grieved?
Why are you sad?
Am not I better to thee than 10 sons?
I mean, he basically tells his wife, why do you need to be a mom?
You got me.
I mean, look at me, I'm awesome.
It's like, why do you even care about being a mom?
I mean, I'm better to you than 10 children.
And talk about a really Bobo statement to make to a wife that is crying and begging
and pleading with God to have a child, okay?
You say, what do you do as the husband if you're in that situation?
You be supportive.
You be the stronger vessel.
You pray to God and you comfort your wife because you must understand that as a husband
that wants to have a child, it is difficult, but it's inside of the heart of a woman that
desire to be a mom, okay?
Inside the heart of a woman is that desire to have a family and to raise kids.
So look, if it's this difficult for you as a husband, it's gonna be this difficult as
a wife that wants to have a child.
Now we as men, we cannot fully understand this feeling about that inward desire to basically
have a child, okay?
And so as a guy, you need to be understanding because you must realize it's gonna be a little
bit different for the wife.
She's gonna wanna have that child even more than you.
I remember the couple of years we waited, I was very sad.
There are many times I was asking God like, why don't we have a child?
But how much more on the mom, okay?
Or how much more on the wife that wants to be a mom because inside of every woman is
that desire to have a child, okay?
Turn to Job 4, Job chapter 4, Job 4.
So what about if you're not the husband?
What about if you're just some other person?
Let's say for example, we have a new couple that joins our church that is married and
everything and they've been praying to have a child and God has not opened the womb and
blessed them with a child, okay?
What do you do if you're another person in that situation, okay?
Well, you do basically the exact opposite of Job's friends.
Let me show you what Job's friends did here in Job 4 verse 7.
Job 4 verse 7, this is a life as talking to Job.
Now remember, Job has lost all of his money, his children, his health, I mean pretty much
everything.
Job 4 verse 7, remember I pray thee, whoever perish being innocent.
Now he's basically referencing Job's children.
He said, your children wouldn't have died if they were innocent.
I mean they must have done something wrong is what he's basically telling to Job, okay?
Or where were the righteous cut off?
Even as I have seen, they that plow iniquity and sow wickedness reap the same.
He's saying you're reaping what you've sown, Job, that's the reason why bad things are
happening.
Well, whoever perish being innocent, well how about Jesus Christ, right?
Didn't Jesus die being completely innocent?
I mean Stephen wasn't sinless, but in Acts chapter 7, wasn't Stephen pretty innocent?
I mean did he commit some wicked sin?
Look, you can die and be an innocent person that did nothing wrong.
You could end up getting some major disease and you didn't do anything wrong.
And it's not because you're a bad person.
It's not because you're a wicked person.
We do not know why these things happen sometimes, right?
This is basically the prosperity gospel that Job's friends are saying, that if you're right
with God, everything's going to go well.
I mean, man, you just give your first fruits offering, man, the money is going to be flying
down from the sky, my friend.
You're going to get stronger and healthy.
I mean, you wake up in the morning after that first fruits offering, man, I haven't been
working out, but man, I'm so strong now and fit.
How did this happen?
It's like I lost like 10 pounds.
This is great.
It's like ever since I gave that first fruits offering, right?
That's the prosperity gospel.
Now in America, it's the Pentecostals that preach that garbage.
Here, the Baptists do the same thing.
Let me tell you something, you can be right with God and bad things happen in your life.
One of the major mistakes people make is they come to a church like this and they're like,
man, I'm learning, I'm growing, I'm reading the Bible, and they naturally assume everything's
going to go well in my life because I'm at this church.
Look, the opposite could happen.
You could join this church and a month later you lose your job and get some disease.
That can happen.
It can be the opposite.
God never promised you you're going to have an awesome life if you live for me.
Everything's going to go great.
You're going to make lots of money.
You're going to be blessed in every way under the sun.
The Bible does not teach that.
Naturally we assume that, but that is not the case.
That's not what the Bible teaches.
So I want you to understand something.
If we have a couple at our church that wants to have children and they're praying to have
children, don't pretend like you know why they don't have children.
Let me tell you something from someone who wanted to have children for a couple of years.
Here's what you don't do.
Don't give advice if you're not asked.
Do not give advice if you're not asked.
You say, why?
Well, for one, you don't know why they don't have children.
It might be God has just closed up the womb temporarily.
Now let me explain something.
If somebody asks you for advice on something, by all means give advice.
If they don't ask for advice, your advice is not wanted.
In all areas, we need to remember that.
And so look, if there's people that want to have a child and God has not blessed them
in that way, hey, if they ask for advice, then give them advice.
If they don't ask for advice, your advice will offend them and make them upset, and
it's going to make them not even want to come to church because every time they come they
get depressed and sad.
They're trying not to think about that.
And by you giving advice, you're forcing them to think about that, okay?
So be very careful, be very sensitive in situations.
If you don't know what to say, you say, I'm praying for you.
Let me know if there's anything we can do for you, something like that.
But don't overstep your bounds, okay?
Now turn in your Bible to Job chapter three, Job chapter three, Job three.
Job chapter three.
So that's pre-pregnancy.
Let us talk about during pregnancy where most of this sermon is going to be, okay?
During pregnancy.
Now when it comes to pregnancy, medically they usually divide it into three sections,
right?
First trimester, the second or middle trimester, and the last trimester.
Now the reason why they divide it into three sections is because these three trimesters
are very different.
It's not that they're just cutting it into thirds, but each stage is very different.
The first trimester is a lot different than the second trimester.
The second is a lot different than the third, and quite honestly at every stage we need
to be prepared.
There are things you need to be ready for, you need to be aware of, okay?
Now I want you to notice here in Job three verse 16 where it says this, or as in hidden
untimely birth I had not been as infants which never saw light.
Now notice how it says infants which never saw light.
What the Bible is referencing is a baby that dies in the womb, okay?
A baby that never sees light.
They end up dying in the womb.
This is what we call a miscarriage, okay?
It says it's a hidden untimely birth.
We'll talk about it later, but there is a proper time for a birth to take place, okay?
And it's basically saying it came at the wrong time and the baby ended up dying and never
saw light, okay?
Turn in your Bible to Malachi three, Malachi three, Malachi three.
And look, there are a lot of verses on this.
We're not going to look at all of them, but if the Bible gives verses then it is something
that is meant to be preached in an appropriate way.
And this is a difficult subject to talk about, and I want you to realize that miscarriages
do take place probably more than you're aware of because of the fact it's not really something
people like to open up about, right?
It's estimated from what I read about 20% of babies end in a miscarriage, and I don't
know if that's accurate or if it's changed the years.
Let's say 15 to 20% or something like that.
I know from personal experience it seems like it would be higher than that.
I know that my sister and I have two siblings that we'll meet up in heaven that my mom had
two children and she had a couple miscarriages, okay?
Miscarriage is something that's pretty common, but it's not always something women will
discuss because it's a painful memory, okay?
Even for the husband, but even more for the wife or the mom of those children.
And so look, I'm not saying it's a fun thing to talk about, but it is something that can
take place because the Bible's trying to prepare you for that, and there are some steps to
some degree we can do, okay?
Malachi 3 verse 11, I want you to notice something.
And this is right after it talks about bringing the tithes in in verse 10, probably a verse
you've heard preached every other week in most other churches.
Malachi 3 verse 11, and I will rebuke the devourer for your sakes and he shall not destroy
the fruits of your ground.
Basically talking about the produce you have if you're a farmer or something like that,
that you're basically, your fruits and vegetables are going to last.
Notice this, neither shall your vine cast her fruit before the time in the field, saith
the Lord of hosts.
It says cast her fruit before the time in the field.
What the Bible's saying is there is a specific proper time for that fruit to be ripe and
ready to be picked.
If it comes early, it's going to be destroyed.
Cast her fruit.
Now when we cross reference this with Exodus 23, turn to Exodus 23, it's going to use that
same terminology of cast, and that's going to let us know in Exodus 23 that it is referring
to a miscarriage taking place in Exodus 23 verse 26.
Exodus 23 verse 26, it says in Exodus 23 verse 26, there shall nothing cast their young nor
be barren in thy land.
Cast their young is referencing it basically coming before its proper time, and the baby
would pass away in the womb is what it's referring to.
Turn to Hosea 9, we'll look at one other place here, Hosea 9, Hosea 9, you say why are you
mentioning this now?
Because the vast majority of miscarriages take place during the first trimester.
The vast majority of miscarriages will take place during the first trimester.
Now generally, in the Bible, you always see the terminology of a miscarriage, but in the
secular world, at least in the US, probably here as well, they consider miscarriage up
to 20 weeks, the first half of pregnancy.
After the last 20 weeks, they will either call it a late-term miscarriage or a stilled
birth if you've heard that terminology.
The reason why they make that distinction, we'll talk about later, because a miscarriage
is far more dangerous if it's a late-term miscarriage than if it's an early term.
Now look, I understand this is not the most pleasant thing to talk about, I understand
that, but the Bible speaks about this for a reason.
I'm trying to give information and be as sensitive as possible regarding this subject, okay?
Hosea 9 verse 14, give them, O Lord, what wilt thou give?
Give them a miscarrying womb and dry breasts.
So it refers there to a miscarriage, okay?
So look, it's far more likely that during the first trimester, this will take place.
You say, what can we take away from this?
Here's what you can take away as the husband.
You need to be supportive of your wife during this time period, okay?
It can be very dangerous for a wife to be carrying large objects during that first trimester.
It's important for her to get her proper sleep.
It's important for her to be healthy and to be strong.
And there's kind of two areas that's very important, which I'll reference later in the
sermon as well, emotionally and physically.
Both areas are very important, okay?
And look, as a guy, we don't understand how this feeling is, okay?
But look, I don't believe that for the last 6,000 years, every woman has just been lying
about childbirth, right?
It's like, man, it was so awesome, but I'm just going to lie to make my husband have
to get me this food or whatever.
No, I mean, it's a real difficult thing.
And I'm going to look at a verse later on that directly states from the Bible that pregnancy
is difficult, going back to Genesis 3, okay?
But turn in your...well, stay there for now.
And let me read you an article from myoclinic.org regarding the first trimester, okay?
Pregnancy might leave you feeling delighted, anxious, exhilarated, and exhausted sometimes
all at once.
Even if you're thrilled about being pregnant, a new baby adds emotional stress to your life.
It's natural to worry about your baby's health, your adjustment to parenthood, and the financial
demands of raising a child.
If you're working, you might worry about how to balance the demands of family and career.
You might also experience mood swings.
What you're feeling is normal.
Take care of yourself and look to loved ones for understanding and encouragement.
If your mood changes become severe or intense, consult your healthcare provider.
The Bible states that there are emotions that a woman goes through during that first
trimester specifically, and they can be all over the place.
You say, you know, oh, you know, my wife was crying.
You know what?
That's normal.
That happens.
We don't understand how those hormones work, okay?
The Bible states this.
I mean, the Bible talks about emotions, but I mean, look, if you look at secular articles,
this is normal.
It is part of life.
Pregnancy can be difficult.
As a guy, you need to be understanding of those emotional needs, okay?
Turn to Genesis chapter three, Genesis three, Genesis three.
But you also need to be understanding of the physical demands of pregnancy.
Now, remember, we saw in the Bible how Sarah received strength to conceive seed.
And the reason why it requires strength is because pregnancy is difficult, okay?
And there are physical demands on the wife and the mom that's going to be delivering
that child, okay?
Now here's a list of things I read online about physically during this time period,
the first trimester, nausea with or without vomiting is normal, feeling sick, increased
urination, fatigue, food cravings, aversions, heartburn, constipation.
Another thing, weight loss is very common in the first trimester.
Now this can depend on who it is, but some women do very well during labor and they don't
get sick all the time.
But weight loss can be a common thing during the first trimester.
Now during the second trimester, usually women will gain weight and get more strength and
everything.
Their body will adjust to it.
But during the first trimester, it's very common to lose weight.
I know for both pregnancies, for us, during the first trimester, my wife lost weight,
okay?
During the first trimester is when women are feeling very sick and nauseous and they're
sleeping and they don't feel like eating and things such as that.
You say, well, what can we take away from this?
Here's what I want you to understand.
If you're the husband and you say, man, you know, I'm the head of the home, I work and
everything, but my wife, she does the cooking and cleaning, et cetera, let me explain something
to you.
Just the way hormones work during this first trimester.
If your wife is cooking a meal, you might cause her to feel sick to her stomach and
then not eat anything that day.
Do you understand that?
You know, honestly, as a guy, you know, it would be smart to maybe do some of the cooking
during that time period.
Look, I understand.
I preach on gender roles, men and women, but let me explain something.
The first trimester is not easy and look, there are plenty of fathers and mothers in
this room and everybody in this room, all the fathers and mothers would say, everything
I'm saying is like, yep, we've been down that road.
Pregnancy is not easy.
It's difficult.
You can lack sleep.
There's emotions, there's fights, there's stress and things like that.
As a guy, you are the stronger vessel and realize this, that if your wife is doing cooking,
oftentimes it will make her feel sick.
She will not be able to eat and physically it's important for your wife to be strong
because pregnancy is not easy.
Now we understand weight loss can be a common thing during the first trimester, but you
do not want your wife just never eating.
My grandmother, when you know, I have an aunt and my mom, you know, they have two kids,
my grandmother and my grandfather's already passed away.
But my grandmother during pregnancy, she was sick for pretty much the entire time.
And when she was pregnant, she got a lot of cavities during both pregnancies.
You say, why?
Because she was sick all the time and it caused her teeth to rot from it.
And look, it depends on the woman, but there are some women during pregnancy that they
will pretty much be out of church for almost nine months because of the fact they're sick
all the time.
That can be a common thing.
It depends on the person and look, people respond differently to pregnancy, okay?
Praise the Lord if it's easy for you and everything like that, hey, that's great.
But for some people it's very difficult and you know what, that is actually normal.
And as the guy, you must be supportive of your wife during that time period.
You say why?
Because if something goes wrong in the pregnancy, it is most likely to happen in the first trimester
because the baby is very small and delicate at that time.
As a guy, you must be very supportive.
You are called to this as a husband and as a father to be supportive of your wife.
You must realize pregnancy is difficult.
Turn to Genesis 3 verse 16, Genesis 3 verse 16, Genesis 3 verse 16, notice what the Bible
says here in Genesis 3 verse 16, onto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy
sorrow and thy conception, in sorrow thou shall bring forth children.
Does that sound like pregnancy is easy according to Genesis 3 verse 16?
Remember the curse on man is the fact that you know what, it's going to be very hard
to provide your needs.
And isn't it hard to work and work and work to provide your needs?
It's difficult.
Realize that's the curse on guys.
And then there's a curse on women as well from Genesis 3.
And so you know what, the Bible is indicating here part of that curse is the fact that you
know what, pregnancy is going to be difficult.
So why are Christians surprised when it ends up being difficult?
I mean, why are you surprised, you know, if your wife's sleeping 12 hours a day and feeling
sick all the time?
Yeah, I mean, Genesis 3 verse 16, the Bible's giving you indication of that.
Okay, it can be difficult.
And as guys and as husbands, you must be supportive of your wife.
Okay.
Turn in your Bible to 2 Kings 19, 2 Kings 19.
Now after the first trimester is over, you get to the second trimester.
Okay.
So this is roughly going to be about 13, 14 weeks, you know, but generally general thirds,
not perfectly to the second, but basically, you know, the middle third is your second
trimester.
So roughly 14 to 26 or 27 weeks.
And you know, during this time period, usually women are doing much better emotionally during
this time period.
Their body's adjusting and things are easier during that second trimester.
Usually there's exceptions.
I'm giving you just a general rule.
And physically, women usually do much better during the second trimester.
They're able to eat, they're able to gain weight.
And that's a good thing because they need strength to bring forth that child, which
we'll talk about, you know, later on in the sermon.
That is a good thing.
And so during this time period, it's a lot easier.
Now a tendency people have to make during that second trimester is like, man, I get
to relax for three months and do nothing.
No, during this time period, you should be studying and preparing for that last trimester.
Because of the fact you have more free time during that second trimester, that is your
time to be prepared and to know what we're going to do.
What sort of things am I talking about?
Well, how about having a bag ready with the things you're going to take to the hospital
or the lying in center or whatever to be prepared for when that baby comes?
Look, that's a lot easier to do than basically, oh man, we got to rush to the hospital and
everything and you're not prepared.
Look, be prepared ahead of time.
Now in this sermon, I am not preaching about vaccine, pro vaccine or anti vaccine or pro
vitamin K or anti vitamin K and all these different tests.
But you know, you personally should be studying and researching that.
You should be aware of what takes place when a baby is brought forth as the wife or as
the husband.
You should be reading articles and be aware of it because look, let me tell you something.
If you don't know what's taking place, you know what, things might happen, shots might
be given that you didn't want to have happen.
You need to be prepared and ready for that.
And during the second trimester, you ought to be studying and reading and learning.
Now look, I get the fact that a lot of us, including myself, are skeptical of a lot of
medical information.
But let me tell you something, there's a lot of great information you can learn when you
read articles.
I'm giving you a sermon to give you a good foundation on things the Bible talks about
and you should be researching and studying and learning to be aware of various things.
Be aware if things go well, but also be aware of things don't go well, which we'll talk
about later on in the sermon.
You need to be prepared, okay?
This is a big moment in your life and it's something you ought to be educated about.
You ought to have a good, strong foundation.
Now I'm not saying that you have to spend like 40 hours a week, but you know, you could
spend a couple hours every week, read some articles, watch some videos.
I mean, I'll tell you, when Zeph was born, we had checkups like every month or something
like that.
And you know what?
We learned a lot of great practical information.
Now there are things that we said, no, we don't want the vaccines and things like that,
the choice that we personally made, but you know, they gave us a lot of great information
that prepared us for what was coming.
Just general practical information.
For example, if the contractions are this far apart versus this far, how to know when
a pregnancy is actually taking place.
It's really practical stuff that we had no idea about, okay?
And in your personal free time, read articles online.
I know for us, we downloaded an app where you press buttons every time there's a contraction
and it would tell you after like a couple minutes, okay, you're going through labor
now.
I mean, the advances in technology can be a good thing.
And we had an app on our phone that we basically, my wife hit a button every time the contraction
started and stopped.
And after a couple minutes it told us, and we did that many times before the baby was
born and it told us this is not labor.
And I'm not saying it's two plus two equals four, but I'm telling you, it was right when
it said, hey, you're in labor, go to the hospital now, okay?
And it was right about it.
And look, there is a lot of great practical information.
And let me say this, as we've talked about recently, the aged women, which in the Bible
means women with experience, they can help you out with a lot of this practical stuff.
It's wise to get advice from people that have gone down through this stuff, okay?
So the second trimester is the time that you are preparing and studying and figuring out
what you're gonna do.
Because let me tell you something, it's easy to be confident before the baby's born.
Once that moment's coming, you're thinking, man, that baby, we are responsible as husband
and wife for this child, okay?
Let's talk about the last trimester, okay?
The last trimester, and I want you to see something in 2 Kings 19, verse three.
And they said unto him, Thus saith Hezekiah, This day is a day of trouble and of rebuke
and blasphemy.
Now notice this, for the children are come to the birth, and there is not strength to
bring forth.
The children are come to the birth, and there is not strength to bring forth.
According to this verse in the Bible, when the actual moment happens, the child comes
to the birth, and then the mom must have the strength to deliver that child, okay?
What's funny is over the last 20 years, the medical industry actually figured this out.
Let me read you an article from a website I found online where it said this, Researchers
now believe that when a baby is ready for life outside his mother's uterus, his body
releases a tiny amount of a substance that signals the mother's hormones to begin labor.
So according to the medical industry now, basically the baby sends something saying,
I'm ready, and then the mom has to have strength to give birth.
Isn't that exactly what it said in 2 Kings 19, verse three?
This is why I can preach a sermon on the subject, because the Bible actually gives us information.
This is something over the last 20 years, this article was from 2004, where they're
discovering this is what actually signals the birth to take place.
So the Bible says that children are come to the birth, and there is not strength to bring forth.
We see though the woman must have the strength to bring forth, okay?
The Bible's telling us that.
Remember earlier, now turn to Isaiah 37, Isaiah 37.
Earlier what we read in Job 3 was an untimely birth.
See there is a proper time for the birth to take place, okay?
There is a proper time for that birth to take place.
Now here's the thing, sometimes it doesn't take 40 weeks.
Sometimes that baby comes to the birth early.
With Zeph, it was like 35 weeks, and we're just like, it's too early.
There's no way that, you know, Zeph's going to be born, I mean, it's only, what, 35 weeks?
36 weeks.
36 weeks we thought, hey, it's too early, it's 40 weeks, right?
But Zeph came to the birth, and he was six pounds and 12 ounces, you know, a pretty solid
size for a baby, right?
And so look, you know what, we don't know the exact time, and that's why you should
be prepared because of the fact, you might think, oh, I've got several more weeks before
we have to worry about this.
And it might come early, okay?
The child comes to the birth, and there's not strength to bring forth.
Isaiah 37 verse 3 says basically the same thing.
And they said on to him, chapter 37 verse 3, Isaiah, and they said on to him, Thus saith
Hezekiah, this day is a day of trouble and a rebuke and a blasphemy, for the children
are come to the birth, and there is not strength to bring forth.
So the Bible mentions this twice.
It's trying to give us information.
The child comes to the birth, and the woman has to have strength to bring forth that child,
okay?
Turn to Genesis 35, Genesis 35, Genesis 35.
In the Bible, and I understand this is a sensitive topic, but in the Bible, there are two instances
of women dying during childbirth.
Now let me say the vast majority of the time, pregnancy goes well, the baby's healthy, the
mom is fine, and things go well.
And look, we are so thankful to have women at our church that God has blessed the child,
and we are praying for you as a church.
We want to do anything we can, and we are happy, we're excited for you.
And look, God forbid that something bad would happen, but at the same time, if the Bible
mentions a topic, it does want us to be educated about it, okay?
There are two instances where women die during childbirth, and what's interesting is you
can see reasons why things don't go well.
And the Bible is actually giving you some information, practical information, that is
expecting mothers and fathers you should be aware of, okay?
Notice what it says in Genesis 35 verse 16, and they journeyed from Bethel, that's important,
they journeyed from Bethel, we'll go back to that in a second.
They journeyed from Bethel, and there was but a little way to come to Ephrath, and Rachel
travailed and she had hard labor, and it came to pass when she was in hard labor that the
midwife said unto her, Fear not, thou shalt have this son also.
And it came to pass as her soul was in departing, for she died, that she called his name Benoni.
His father called him Benjamin, and Rachel died and was buried in the way to Ephrath,
which is Bethlehem.
Now let me say this, that I am not saying this is the reason why Rachel dies, but I
don't think anything in the Bible is incidental, coincidental, or accidental, I think the Bible
is trying to teach us something.
It said in verse 16, they journeyed from Bethel.
Let me ask you a question, when a woman is about to have a baby coming to the very end,
is it a good thing for her to be in a journey, to be moving around a lot and to be very active?
No it's not.
Look when a baby is about to come during that last couple months, oftentimes the woman will
be on bed rest for the last couple months.
Anybody who's a mom and a father, they're aware of this stuff, and you know what, everyone
who's expecting, you should be aware of this, or people that will have a child one day,
that look, when it's coming towards the end, oftentimes it is good for the wife to basically
be on bed rest.
Now this depends on the situation.
I knew somebody in West Virginia that two days before she gave birth, she was out soul
winning.
And hey, praise the Lord, if that's your pregnancy, amen.
I mean, God didn't just bless, he gave you a double blessing, right?
You're soul winning until right when the baby comes, and hey, praise the Lord if that happens.
But at the same time, we're not trying to pressure ladies at our church into being out
soul winning when they're pregnant.
During that last trimester, it can be a very difficult time physically.
And look, it depends on the situation.
But if women need to rest, then the last eight weeks, guys, just realize you need to be doing
a lot of stuff, and you might not be sleeping much.
You might be doing a lot of the cooking and cleaning and grocery shopping.
And let me tell you something, there are plenty of fathers and mothers in this room, and we've
been down that road.
We understand how it is, it is difficult, and as guys, you must step up to the plate.
You say why?
The Bible said that children are come to the birth.
And here's the thing, if women are too active during the last trimester, oftentimes it will
force contractions on the body, and it will force the child to be born before it is ready.
The Bible specifically said that children come to the birth, but if a mom's health is
not the best towards the end, it can force contractions early, and bad things can take
place, okay?
Guys that when a baby is in the womb, the baby is stealing the vitamins from the mom.
And so it's important for the moms, and you're personally, you need to be eating healthy
and things such as that and preparing yourself, but as guys, you must be understanding during
this time period, because you do not want the baby to come early when it's not ready.
Bad things could take place, okay?
Turn to 1 Samuel 4, 1 Samuel 4, 1 Samuel 4, 1 Samuel chapter 4, and look, as I said,
you know, Lord willing, everything will go perfectly for all the expecting moms, but
you know what?
You need to be prepared, and husbands, you need to be willing to step up to the plate,
okay?
Yes, it's difficult, but let me explain something to you.
When the baby's born, your life isn't going to get easier as a mom or a father.
It's like you're having children.
Guess what?
If you want to be a good mom and a good father, you have to be willing to work really hard,
and some days you don't sleep that much.
Some days you're taking turns holding the baby in the middle of the night.
Look, that's reality, okay?
So look, yeah, it's difficult during that last trimester.
Yeah, you know what?
Life is difficult.
That's the way it is, okay?
First Samuel 4.
So we saw with Rachel that one reason why she might have had a...
Not miscar...
Why she might have died during birth is her body had too much physical stress toward the
end when maybe she should have been resting more, okay?
But in First Samuel 4, we see the other instance of a woman dying during labor, and she is
going through emotional stress, okay?
First Samuel 4, verse 19, and his daughter-in-law, Phineas' wife, was with child near to be delivered.
So near to be delivered, last trimester, she's about to give birth.
She's near to be delivered, and when she heard the tidings that the ark of God was taken,
and that her father-in-law and her husband were dead, she bowed herself and travailed,
for her pains came upon her.
And about the time of her death, the women that stood by her said unto her, Fear not,
for thou hast borne a son.
But she answered not, neither did she regard it.
And she named the child Ichabod, saying, The glory is departed from Israel, because the
ark of God was taken, and because of her father-in-law and her husband.
And she said, The glory is departed from Israel, for the ark of God is taken.
And it mentioned about the time of her death, okay, in verse number 20.
And so what can we see with this woman?
She's about to give birth, and she finds out her husband's dead.
And her father-in-law is dead, and the ark of God is taken.
Is that emotional stress?
I mean, you're in the middle of labor, and all of a sudden you find out, or near to be
delivered, and you find out your husband's dead.
It doesn't really get much more emotionally stressful than that, right?
And you know what?
I sort of try to picture in my head this woman who's trying to give birth, and she just doesn't
have the strength.
She's emotionally fragile.
Her life has been broken.
She does not have the strength to give, I mean, she gives birth, but I mean, she ends
up dying as a result of this.
Say what are you trying to say?
Here's what I'm trying to say.
Hey, if your wife is in the last trimester, don't argue with her.
Don't make her cry, and make her emotionally stressful.
You say why?
Because of the fact it can be dangerous.
That's reality.
Look, I understand pregnancy can be stressful.
It can be difficult.
We're looking at verses and passages in the Bible, but we see both instances where a woman
dies during childbirth, she's either going through physical or emotional stress.
And look, you want your wife to be physically and emotionally strong for that moment to
come.
You say why?
It could be very difficult to give birth if you're going through physical or emotional
stress.
It can be very dangerous on the woman.
We saw in Genesis 3 that childbirth will be difficult.
That's part of the curse of God upon women.
And look, that's a reality.
It's going to be difficult.
You must be understanding and supportive of your wife.
And during that last trimester, when Christabel was born, we didn't want my wife picking up
Zeph during that last trimester.
Say why?
Zeph's a big kid.
That's a lot of weight for a woman to be carrying during that last trimester when her body's
preparing to have the strength to give birth.
It's not that healthy on a woman.
Now we understand some pregnancies can be different.
It's not one size fits all.
But realize that oftentimes women need to be on bed rest for that last month and a half
or two months.
And as a guy, you must be okay with that because that is reality.
Turn in your Bible to Hosea 9, Hosea 9, Hosea chapter 9.
This is the sort of sermon where every guy, you know, hates my guts afterwards and the
women are like, oh, that's the greatest sermon you've ever preached, right?
I told you, you need...
No, I'm just joking.
I'm not going to say anything.
No jokes.
But look, we understand.
Look, pregnancy is difficult, right?
The Bible said it's going to be difficult.
It's not easy.
And look, I want you to realize that, look, obviously I have a few children and there's
men at a room that have had children and look, I guarantee that, you know, when their wives
were expecting, it was a difficult time.
You're busy, you're tired, you're stressed out and you're like, man, it can be a difficult
time period.
Now, look, you know, this is sort of outside the scope of the sermon, but let me just say
this that, and God forbid it would ever happen at our church, but a very common time where
men commit adultery is when their wives are pregnant.
That is a very common time.
Okay.
Now obviously that's wicked, but it's like, you know, women are, you know, women and men
are stressed out and everything and you know, some guys that are not doing a very good job
of laying down their lives for their wives, oftentimes they commit adultery during that
time period.
Okay.
Look, we understand pregnancy is difficult, but the Bible does give us guidance.
And as guys, you are the stronger vessel, okay?
Let's talk about post-pregnancy and let's talk about when things do not go well.
When things do not go well.
Now, Lord willing, everything will go well, but at the same time, you need to be prepared.
Okay.
Whether things go well or things don't go well.
When things don't go well.
What's one example?
One example my wife and I dealt with is your baby is born and then your baby starts losing
weight.
Your baby is not gaining weight.
Now, when a baby is born, if you wait, if a baby is born at 2 PM today and you wait
the baby 2 PM tomorrow, the baby will probably weigh less because there's certain liquids
and fluids that will be gone from the body.
So generally, babies lose weight over the first day or two or something like that.
But if that continues, that's a problem.
They should not be continually losing weight.
Zeph was losing weight and losing too much.
They have a general scale where you weigh your baby, you come back and weigh it.
And if it's lost more than a certain amount, it's kind of danger zone and things such as
that.
And Zeph was far below the danger zone.
He was losing weight.
And the reason why is because he was not able to get enough milk.
You know, obviously we were trying to, you know, my wife was breastfeeding Zeph, but
he was not able to get enough milk.
There are multiple reasons why a baby might not be able to get enough milk.
Hosea 9 verse 14 kind of mentions this a little bit.
Notice what it said.
Give them, O Lord, what wilt thou give?
Give them a miscarrying womb and dry breasts.
Okay.
And dry breast is referring to the fact that milk is not being produced by the mom.
Now as a new mom, there are certain foods and vitamins and things you can eat that will
help increase the milk supply.
But here is the curse of God where he said he's going to basically give that to the people.
The women are going to have dry breasts and not be able to feed their children when they're
born.
You say, what ends up taking place in a situation like this?
Well, my wife and I, we went to the checkup at the hospital and you know, Zeph was not
sleeping during the night because he's basically starving.
Okay.
And so he's, you know, and we're exhausted.
We took turns trying to put him to sleep and everything, and he had lost weight.
And you know, they said, what you need to do, we need to supplement the breast milk
with basically formula milk.
Now here's the thing.
As someone who wants to go as natural and as safe as possible, my first reaction is,
no, I don't want to do that, right?
Because I'm thinking, no, the baby's born.
Everything should be perfect.
Everything should work.
But the reality was Zeph was losing weight and he was not able to get enough milk.
Now I don't think formula is as healthy as breast milk, but at the same time, millions
of people have used it when necessary.
And even during this day, I'm sure they had something similar.
Maybe if the mom didn't produce enough milk, maybe given to another mom or something like
that, you know, to nurse that child.
But look, you know what?
Although I don't think formula is as good, as natural, the way God designed it, sometimes
things don't go perfectly.
And I would be very cautious to be too stubborn and just say, no, we're just going to do this
and trust in God.
That was my first reaction, right?
But then I realized, you know what?
It's just like, I cannot risk this with Zeph.
And then a week later you say, Brother Stuckey, was Zeph ever able to get enough food?
He gets plenty of food, okay?
He's doing well and our son is healthy, right?
Now I would have preferred not having to do that, but at the same time, I'm not going
to risk my son's life, right?
Okay?
So look, realize that, you know, often you think, man, the baby's born, nothing's going
to go wrong now.
Sometimes things can still be a little bit off.
And sometimes you do need to consult medical and health professionals that can help you
out with this, okay?
What about another situation?
Another situation which, you know, is not pleasant to think about is a late term miscarriage
or what's known as a stillbirth, which is after the 20 week mark, okay?
Now look, I want you to realize that if a miscarriage takes place, it is not healthy
for the mom no matter when it takes place.
I strongly recommend that if things do not go well, that you seek professional medical
help, okay?
If a miscarriage takes place, it is very common for an infection to happen with the women
and it can put their life at risk, okay?
Now if the miscarriage is earlier, it's generally safer for the women.
If it's after 20 weeks, it can be more dangerous because if you have a late term miscarriage,
usually the women will still have to give birth to that child even after it's already
passed away, okay?
And I want you to realize that, you know, when a baby's born, they're going to weigh
roughly six, seven pounds depending on the child.
And if there's a late term miscarriage, you have a six pound baby inside of you and it
doesn't just magically go away.
And so oftentimes women will have to give birth to that child or you know what?
You have to seek professional medical help because it can be a dangerous thing, okay?
Now look, Lord willing, this will not happen and everything will go well, but I'm just
trying to give you advice that you know what?
If things don't go well, you need to seek professional help.
Turn to 2 Samuel chapter 12, 2 Samuel 12.
You say, why brother Stuckey?
Well, the Bible says, they that behold need not a physician, but they that are sick.
They that behold need not a physician, but they that are sick.
If something goes wrong, then you need a physician.
See, if you have no problems, then no need of a physician.
I get that.
That's why I'm not a big person to go to the doctors all the time.
They that behold need not a physician.
If I'm not sick, I personally, I don't really go to checkups and things like that, but here's
the thing.
Don't be foolish when things don't go well and say, well, we're just going to figure
it out.
It's like they that behold need not a physician, but they that are sick in the Bible saying,
if you are sick, you need a physician.
Look, if you break your leg, go ahead and eat all these vitamins you want and have some
apple cider vinegar and just pray and just assume you're going to be fine.
It's like, no, you need a physician and if things don't go well, then you know what?
You need a physician.
The Bible says, okay, you need a doctor, you need professional medical help, a midwife
or whatever.
And look, even if you have, if you have your baby, you know, born, you know, midwife delivers
like for Christabel, you know, actually both of our children, midwives delivered.
Here's the thing though.
If things don't go perfectly, they make you go to the hospital.
Why?
Because of the fact things can be dangerous and if things don't go well, they need to
be prepared in case something happens.
Okay.
That's reality.
Okay.
Another situation, you know, we have, before we go to second Samuel 12, let me just say
when Christabel was born, she had a knot in her umbilical cord.
Okay.
Now a knot only takes place if the baby is very makulit and they're like swimming and
running and doing all kinds of crazy things and look, Christabel is just going to be just
like Zeph.
Right.
And so basically the baby is the one that forms that knot.
Now think about when we're putting water in the baptistry, if there's a knot that's,
you know, really deep or whatever, or it's like, you know, not, you know, the water's
not going to go through.
So that can be a very dangerous thing.
This is not a very common thing and with Christabel, she was okay, but you know, that's the sort
of thing that can cause, you know, babies to end up, you know, not making it or things
like that.
You know, so there are things that can go wrong.
Okay.
Now how do we handle this as husbands, as wives?
This is what it says in 2 Samuel 12, if things do not go well, 2 Samuel 12 verse 19.
But when David saw that his servants whispered, David perceived that the child was dead.
Therefore David said unto his servants, is the child dead?
And they said, he is dead.
And so David has been fasting and weeping for his child because obviously David committed
adultery.
God strikes the child, you know, this is after the child's born and look, sometimes you hear
about this.
When babies are born, you think everything's okay and the baby gets sick.
Infant mortality rate is a lot higher than at other ages.
Okay.
You know, I used to work with mortality rates all the time in my job in Maryland and West
Virginia and it's like the rate of death is so much higher at a young age, at the age
of as an infant or as one and then the rate like will drastically drop as they get to
a certain age.
Okay.
Because the baby is very small and fragile and sometimes things happen.
Here's an instance where David's son ends up getting sick and David's son dies.
Okay.
Verse 20.
Then David arose from the earth and washed and anointed himself and changed his apparel
and came into the house of the Lord and worshiped.
Then he came to his own house and when he required, they set bread before him and he
did eat.
Then said his servants unto him, what thing is this that thou hast done?
Thou didst fast and weep for the child while it was alive.
But when the child was dead, thou didst rise and eat bread.
So they say to David, I mean, you're fasting and weeping and we didn't even want to tell
you your son died because we figured, man, you're not going to be able to take it.
And once David found out his son died, he got up, washed himself, he ate and he got
himself together emotionally.
Now you say, why did he do that or how was he able to do that?
He did that because he had to do that.
I'll show this to you.
Verse 23, verse 22.
And he said, while the child was yet alive, I fasted and wept.
For I said, who can tell whether God will be gracious to me that the child may live?
But now he is dead.
Wherefore should I fast?
Can I bring him back again?
I shall go to him, but he shall not return to me.
Obviously babies go to heaven when they die.
But notice this, why does he have to be emotionally okay?
And David comforted Bathsheba, his wife.
Do you think David was feeling good when his son died?
Absolutely not.
I mean, he prayed his son would be okay, but he had to get himself together.
You say, why?
Because there is a grieving mom that just lost a child.
And as painful as that is on the husband, do you realize how much more painful that
is on the wife that just lost a child?
David comforted his wife, Bathsheba.
Notice the rest of this verse.
And went in on to her and lay with her and she bare a son and he called his name Solomon
and the Lord loved him.
Notice this verse talks about, basically he comforts his wife, she gets pregnant again,
she's with child again, and then 40 weeks go by.
We're looking at basically a year.
Do you know what the Bible's telling us?
The Bible's saying he comforted his wife over the period of a year.
Not just, well, man, he's doing bad, he comforted his wife after two days, the mom's doing great.
No, for seasons he was there for his wife comforting her.
Look, if things don't go well, as the guys, as the husbands, you must realize your wife's
going to need comfort for a long time.
And you need to be there and you say, man, but I'm not feeling well.
Yeah, but men are the stronger vessel.
Husbands are the heads of the homes.
And if you get up and preach, hey, husbands are the heads of the homes, well then act
like it when situations go wrong.
Stay emotionally strong when necessary.
You say, why?
Your wife who's expecting a child, she must be emotionally and physically okay.
And look, if things don't go well, you must be the rock of that family that says, you
know what?
Our family's still going to stay in church.
We're still going to read the Bible.
We're still going to serve God.
We're going to pray and look, and if your wife is just struggling and she's just like,
you know, emotionally, look, you must be the rock in that family.
You are called to do that as the husband.
You are the stronger vessel.
Now, look, I don't think that David was, you know, more, more godly than Bathsheba or whatever
in this situation.
You know, the Bible doesn't say.
What I know is that women are more emotionally fragile than men, and the Bible says that
David goes through a rough time, but you know what?
Afterwards, he picks himself off the ground.
He washes himself.
He realizes as a guy, sometimes the Bible says you play the man.
You are emotionally strong for your wife, okay?
That's what we see here.
Go to John 16, John chapter 16, John 16.
And let me just mention a few other things real quickly before we turn to John 16.
And realize this, you know, let's say everything goes well, you know, Lord willing, everything
goes well.
Realize that, you know, after the baby's born, you know, there is a time period where the
wife still needs to recover.
And as the guy, you know, after the baby's born, it's like, no, she's not going back
to cooking a five-course dinner from day one, okay?
There is a recovery time that takes place with a woman, and that is a very important
thing, okay?
Recovery time, because look, pregnancy is difficult, okay?
There can be a recovery time.
Now, I would say this, that I would personally suggest that as women, I believe you need
to trust your body, and you'll get advice from other ladies about various situations
like this.
You know, you know your body.
If something's not right, then, you know, you're going to be aware of that.
That's your body and everything, okay?
But I would suggest, you know, you get advice from people and things like that.
And look, by all means, husbands and wives should do their research.
You should have a general understanding of this stuff.
I can say, honestly, that when Zeph was born, I had read a lot of articles, I had watched
a lot of things, and it's just like, yeah, you know what, I watched a lot of those things
with my wife as they talked about the different stages and stuff like that, and, you know,
I took part in the fact that our son was going to be born and everything.
I tried to, and look, I'm not claiming to be perfect.
Yeah, I understand, you know, pregnancy is difficult.
During that time period, there are a lot of stresses with husbands and wives.
All of us understand that, okay?
Everyone understands that.
What I'm saying is, yeah, mainly for this sermon, it's for guys, you must be supportive
of your wives, okay?
And look, we understand also when children are born, there's an adjustment time for when
you raise children as well.
Hey, as people that have kids or that are older or whatever, you know what, we need
to be understanding of, you know, the new husbands and wives at our church, the new
moms and dads, because they're going to be going through that phase of getting used to
all these things.
It's like, you know, when your kids are born, you learn a lot.
It's like every year, you know, you learn new things about how to be a better father,
how to be a better husband.
As a church family, we need to be supportive of new husbands, new wives, new moms, and
new dads, and realize that there's an adjustment phase for them.
We understand that.
John 16 verse 21, let's close up here.
Let's talk about when things go well.
What does the Bible say in John 16 verse 21?
And look, this is the vast majority of the time, things will go well.
I just want you to be prepared, because the Bible speaks about it.
But John 16 verse 21, a woman when she is in travail hath sorrow, because her hour has
come.
But as soon as she is delivered of the child, she remember no more the anguish for joy that
a man is born into the world.
I mean, I was there for the birth of both of our children.
And I can say this is the case.
It's like, you know, labor is very difficult.
It's painful.
And once that child is born, man, the smile and excitement on that mom's face.
Now, as a father, I was excited as well.
But you know, as we said, inside the heart of every woman is a desire to be a mom.
And Lord willing, you know, as a church, let me say as a church family, you know, we need
to be praying for all the expecting parents at our church, you know, that everything will
go well.
And also the adjustment phases and everything like that, because it's a difficult time,
you know, obviously, you know, whenever you start something new, you know what, by definition,
you're a novice.
Now, that doesn't, that's not something bad, you know.
But when Zeph was born from day one, I was a novice of being a father, right?
I mean, that's understandable.
Whenever you start something new, you're a novice.
So we need to be understanding of these new moms and dads at our church and be excited
for them and encourage them and help them in any way we can.
Let's close in a word of prayer.
Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for allowing us to be here today.
And thank you for being a God that answers all of our questions and gives us insight
on all manner of topics, God, and, you know, help us as a church family to be supportive
of the expecting moms and expecting fathers of our church, God.
We pray everything will go okay for these moms, God.
We ask you to bless them, continue to bless our church family, and, you know, we just
want to be as supportive as we can, God.
We pray this in Jesus' name.
Amen.