And basically, Jacob's just kind of going about his life, going about his day.
He doesn't necessarily have some major plans on what's going to take place, but he's just
kind of going about his normal day.
Verse 7, and he said, lo, it is yet high day, neither is it time that the cattle should
be gathered together.
Water ye the sheep and go and feed them.
So Jacob's saying, hey, it's time to water and to feed the sheep, okay?
It's time to do this.
It's time to do this work.
Verse 8, and they said, we cannot until all the flocks be gathered together, until they
roll the stone from the well's mouth, then we water the sheep.
So you've got these workers, and they're saying, hey, we're okay with watering the sheep.
There's just a problem.
We've got to roll away this stone first.
And until this stone is rolled away, we're not going to be able to water the sheep, okay?
Notice what it says in verse 9.
And while he yet spake with them, Rachel came with her father's sheep, for she kept
them.
And it came to pass, notice this, when Jacob saw Rachel, right?
The Bible is very specific with every word.
That's why we need an every word Bible, okay?
And it says when Jacob saw Rachel, so at this precise moment, he's going about his day,
we've got to roll away the stone, and then all of a sudden he sees this woman, right?
This is what you call love at first sight.
Brother Stuckey, do you believe in love at first sight?
Well, it's right here, right?
When Jacob saw Rachel, notice this, when Jacob saw Rachel, when Jacob saw Rachel, the daughter
of Laban, his mother's brother, and the sheep of Laban, his mother's brother, that Jacob
went near and rolled the stone from the well's mouth and watered the flock of Laban, his
mother's brother.
So right when he sees Rachel, instead of just sitting around and waiting for the people
to roll away the stone, he just does it himself.
This is like one of those stories where somebody gets trapped underneath a car and they got
that superhuman strength to push the car off them to roll out.
It's like he sees the love of his life, love at first sight, and then all of a sudden it's
just like, boom, right?
He becomes like Samson in this story, right?
And so he rolls away the stone, and what you're seeing here is he's trying to impress this
woman that he finds attractive.
That's what you're seeing here, okay?
Now I would also say on a side point, this shows that Jacob wasn't just this little girly
mama's boy who wasn't very tough because this is a job for many people to roll away
the stone.
Well, obviously Jacob was someone who kept busy because you're not going to have that
sort of strength to roll away the stone by yourself unless you're pretty strong, right?
And so go to verse number 14, verse 14, and Laban said to him, surely thou art my bone
and my flesh.
He's saying we're relatives, we're family, right?
And he abode with him the space of a month, okay?
So basically Laban says to Jacob, you're my family, you're new in this area, you're welcome
to stay with us for free basically, right?
We'll pay for your food, you've got a lodging, you can just stay with us because we're family,
right?
We're flesh and bones, we're blood, we're family.
And it says, and he abode with him the space of a month.
So here's the question, what was he doing for a month?
Does he just kind of take a vacation and say, man, I get to stay with the family, they make
the food, I'm gonna sleep in till noon, kick up my feet and relax, and you know, just hang
out on YouTube and the TV and all that stuff?
Well notice what it says, and Laban said unto Jacob, this is after a month has gone by where
he's staying for free, and Laban said unto Jacob, because thou art my brother, shouldest
thou therefore serve me for naught, right?
What Laban's saying is, hey, I provided your lodging and your food, but you know what,
you know, you're doing far and above what I asked you to do.
He's like, I let you stay here, but you're serving me for naught, you're working, you're
staying busy, you're helping, and I'm not paying you right now, right?
Basically Jacob at six in the morning when people went off to work, guess what Jacob
did?
He went off to work with them.
Was he getting paid for it?
No.
Did he ask to get paid?
No, he just did it, right?
He's trying to stay busy.
And here's the thing, if you have a month and you sit around and do nothing, you're
going to end up being miserable.
That's reality.
I mean I understand we all have those days, like you know sometimes you have those days
you have a soul winning marathon on Friday, you have church service on Saturday, you get
back late, you have church service, sweetheart banquet, soul winning and everything, and
it's like tonight I'm going to be like, man, I just want to relax for a little while.
But you know, if I sat around and did nothing tomorrow, I'll end up being miserable at the
end of the day.
That's the way it works.
I'm not saying it's wrong to have vacation and have free time, but you know, whenever
we have free time, we end up doing nothing.
That's just the way it works, right?
So Jacob is staying busy and Laban says, you know what, you know, should you serve me for
not?
It's like, I don't want to take advantage of you.
You're my family, right?
He's like, I'm not asking you to do this.
Then he says, tell me what shall thy wages be?
Basically, you know what, I want you to work for me.
How much do I have to pay you to work for me?
Now look, this is not very common, right?
Have you ever had a job interview where the boss says, you know what, I want you to work
here.
Just how much do we need to pay you to get you to work here?
That's what they're saying to Jacob.
You say why?
Jacob's a good worker.
He's providing a lot for Laban, right?
He's going out and farming and he's out working probably everybody else.
And then Laban says, I want to make sure you stay here, right?
I had you just staying with us for free for a month.
No, I need you to be my employee, right?
You're a good worker.
How much do we need to pay you?
Okay.
How much the only people that get this sort of offer are celebrities, athletes and celebrities
where it's like, hey, how much do we have to pay you to play, you know, for the Los
Angeles Lakers, right?
We want you to play.
We'll pay you whatever you need, right?
That only happens with celebrities.
This is just a normal job and Jacob is such a good worker that Laban says, what should
we pay you?
Okay, look at verse 16.
And Laban had two daughters.
The name of the elder was Leah and the name of the younger was Rachel.
Leah was tender eyed, but Rachel was beautiful and well favored.
And Jacob loved Rachel and said, I will serve these seven years for Rachel, thy younger
daughter.
Now, look, this is a sermon on how to find a wife.
I'm not suggesting at a job interview you make this sort of deal.
It's like, I'll serve you for seven years if I can marry your daughter, right?
That's not the application I'm looking to make here today, right?
Don't get overexcited.
Man, I got the answer.
It's right there in the Bible.
That's what I know.
That's not the answer.
Okay.
But he serves for Rachel.
He loves Rachel.
The food and lodging is fine.
I don't need to make a savings.
I just, you know, I love your daughter.
I want to marry her.
Right.
And he serves for seven years.
Obviously, we know the story gets kind of, you know, crazy here in Genesis 29 and everything.
But he wants to marry Rachel.
Okay.
You say, well, what is your point?
Here's my point.
When you look at everybody who gets married in the Bible, you know what?
There really is no system like a math problem of how it happens.
It's random.
It's random when it happens.
It's random how it happens.
I mean, Jacob's just going about his day.
Rachel's going about her day.
They're not planning on this.
It just kind of happens.
And I'll be honest.
Like, I'm not asking for the married couples to tell us.
But, you know, if you were to ask all the married couples, how did you get married?
You know what?
You're going to find very different ways that it happened.
And you're going to find out, man, it's random, right?
You don't know when it's going to happen.
It's not like you get to decide, I'm going to get married at the age of 25.
I'm going to meet my wife here.
I mean, you honestly just don't know, right?
I can't give you advice here today that says if you do this automatically at this age,
you're going to meet that person.
It's honestly random.
And some people, they wait longer than others.
You just don't know how it's going to happen.
You say, well, what advice could you give me then?
Here's my advice.
Instead of looking for the perfect person, make sure you're prepared already to meet
that person.
Because you don't know when it's going to happen.
But you can prepare yourself so if it does happen in a month, you're ready.
What good does it do to meet the perfect person, but it's like, oh, man, I need six months
to get ready.
It doesn't do you any good.
See, it's more important to prepare yourself so when the opportunity does come, you're
ready.
You don't want to lose out on this opportunity.
Look, if Jacob was not ready, then the opportunity is gone.
If Rachel's not ready, then the opportunity is gone.
You have to be prepared for that, okay?
Turn in your Bible to 1 Timothy 5.
First Timothy 5.
First Timothy chapter 5.
And you know, with some people, it seems to work out pretty easy for them.
They find the right person.
For other people, maybe it takes more work.
I know I got married when I was 30 years old, and I would have been happy to get married
a long time ago, but just didn't meet the right person, right?
I mean, how people get married, I mean, sometimes it's kind of random how you're going to meet
that person.
But instead of just like finding the person that meets that perfect checklist, you need
to make sure you're prepared for that person, because here's the thing.
You might find the perfect person.
Here's a question.
Did they find the perfect person, though?
Right?
You said, man, I found the guy who, he's got his house, he's got a 10 bedroom house that
he owns already.
He's got this nice car.
He's great looking.
He's in great shape.
He's so romantic and sweet, and he loves soul winning.
I found that unicorn that doesn't exist, right?
But here's the thing.
Is he going to feel the same way about you when he sees you?
And likewise, the other way as well, right?
A guy looking for the perfect girl, and he found exactly who he wants.
Here's the question, though.
Did she find what she wanted?
See, it's more important that you prepare yourself, because here's the thing.
You don't know when that day is going to come, okay?
When it comes to preparation, there's three things I want to look at here today.
One of them is financial preparation.
Here's the thing.
That is a large, large, large, large portion of finding the right person is just financially
being ready for that right person.
First Timothy five verse eight, first Timothy five verse eight, but if any provide not for
his own, and especially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith and is
worse than an infidel.
Now notice how it says his own, his own house, he hath denied the faith.
You say, what is the Bible trying to teach in that verse?
It's trying to teach it's the guy's responsibility to provide for the family.
That's what the Bible teaches.
Now I know this is makalumong preaching in 2021, but the word of God is timeless.
The word of God doesn't change.
Now I'm not saying it's a sin or it's wrong for ladies to work some and people have different
situations.
Obviously you understand that.
I've talked about that before, but there's no question that the Bible puts a responsibility
on providing financially on the husband's shoulders.
Now here's the thing.
There's plenty on the lady's shoulders as well.
This is not a sexist thing or no, this is just what the Bible teaches, right?
If any provide, it's not for his own.
Now here's the thing though.
There's other versions of the Bible that would take that responsibility off of the man and
just put it onto everybody.
I mean in modern versions it says if any provide not for their own house.
Is their own house the same as his own house?
Does that teach the same thing?
Not only does it do that, in other versions in 1st Timothy 5 it's not just your own house,
they make it your entire family.
So you've got that cousin that's your 20th cousin, five times removed or whatever, and
you're responsible to provide for them as well.
But is that really what the Bible teaches in 1st Timothy 5?
Your own house is referring to husband, wife, and the children, your individual house.
Now look, I understand not everybody's in this situation and I'm not saying it's wrong
to help family.
I'm just saying this is what the Bible teaches in 1st Timothy 5.
In the modern versions they teach something else, okay?
Verse 14, I will therefore the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give
none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully.
So the guy's responsibility primarily is to be the provider for the family, and the
woman's responsibility is to guide the house, to have children and guide the house.
Now the question I would have to these modern versions and people that want to preach from
those, if the his own is changed in 1st Timothy 5 verse 8, does that mean in verse 14 it's
just as much the guy's responsibility to bear children?
Because if you're going to take away the his own in 1st Timothy 5 verse 8, I guess in verse
14, husbands have to do half the work when it comes to four and a half months in your
belly, four and a half months in mine, or you get the first child, I'll get the second
child.
Does that make sense?
No.
See, the Bible's giving a distinction between men and women.
It's obvious in the chapter.
There's a distinction between men and women, and whenever these modern versions make changes,
the problem is they make a lot of mistakes along the way that they can't correct, okay?
So this is what the Bible teaches.
And when it comes to being financially ready, as a guy, if you're not married but you're
looking to get married in the next couple years or even if you're younger, you know
what?
You need to be ready financially.
That is a large part of marriage.
I mean, I wish that when you said I do, that your life would never have any stresses with
money.
But there is not a single thing on this planet for most guys that stresses them more than
money.
I mean, that's the reality.
That's a major, major stress in your life.
And here's the thing.
I get it when you're young.
Hey, I have the money to go to these fancy places.
I have the money to spend it on this.
But you know what?
You're going to wish in 10 years, you know what?
I wish I had just saved up that money to eventually make a down payment on a house or a down payment
on a car or save it up so I have less stresses when I get married.
You are going to regret using up all of your money before you're married.
That's reality.
Turn in your Bible to Ruth chapter two.
Ruth two.
Ruth chapter two.
You know, one reason why I preach on really this topic specifically a lot about finances
is honestly to correct all the mistakes all these other Baptist churches are doing.
Right.
And it's like I preach against repentsive sins like last week.
But honestly, you know, this topic really messes up people's lives because they teach
just trust in God.
Right?
Just trust in God.
Go full time into the ministry.
God will provide.
It's just like, you know what?
They're giving bad advice to people and they guilt people into being full time workers
and not preparing themselves financially.
And the reality is 10 years down the road, those people, they're going to regret it once
they're trying to get married and have a family.
It's difficult.
And the Bible says bear the yoke in your youth.
And if you bear the yoke in your youth, it's going to make it a lot easier once you transition
to being married and having a family.
Right.
And you end up in preparing for yourself a career.
And you know what?
I hope, Lord willing, all these young children that we have, we have so many first time parents.
My kids aren't that old.
So many people are raising very young children.
I hope that we not only teach them the word of God and salvation, but we prepare them
for life when they end up getting married themselves.
One aspect of being financially prepared is the husbands.
You wives are like, go get them.
Right.
You know, go get those guys.
Right.
Yeah.
And as a wife before you're married and you're a single lady, you could also help prepare
yourself financially as well to make the stress a little bit less on your husband when you
do get married.
I mean, if you're able to save money every single week and have some money when you first
get married, how big of a blessing would that be on a new marriage to have extra money saved
up that you don't just have to spend all of your money now and say, well, it's my husband's
responsibility.
Yeah.
When you're married and you're having a lot of fights due to finances, it's like those
could have maybe been avoided if you also prepared yourselves financially as well.
Okay.
Ruth chapter two, verse one.
Ruth two, verse one.
And Naomi had a kinsman of her husband's, a mighty man of wealth of the family of Elimelech.
And his name was Boaz.
And Ruth of Moabites said unto Naomi, Let me now go to the field and glean ears of corn
after him in whose sight I shall find grace.
And she said unto her, Go, my daughter.
And she went and came and gleaned in the field after the reapers.
Here's a situation where Ruth, she leaves Moab.
I don't have time to go into the full story, but basically Elimelech makes a bad choice
and he moves his family.
He moves his family to a wicked area, to Moab.
And you know, they have the two children that are married and then the sons die, the father
dies, Elimelech, and then Naomi is left to herself, right?
And so then you have Ruth and you have Orpah and Ruth decides to forsake all in order to
serve God.
Now you have to understand in the Old Testament, if you really wanted to serve God, you had
to relocate to that area that had the priesthood, the Levitical law, and all of that stuff.
You could get saved in Moab, but you couldn't really fully serve God.
Just like in our modern day, you need to be part of a local church to serve God.
And if you're not part of a church, you can still be saved, absolutely, but you're not
going to serve God unless you're part of a church, okay?
And so Ruth makes a decision, I'm willing to forsake all in order to serve God.
You know what that meant?
It meant that her parents were not going to financially provide for her.
It meant she was going to have to get a job and provide for herself.
It meant she was going to have to take a leap of faith that things were going to work out.
And you know what, when you serve God, sometimes there's a cost to you.
And Ruth makes a decision to serve God and Orpah just decides, well, and then she decides
to stay in Moab.
And you know what, many people in this world, many people at our church have been put in
a stage of life where you've got to make a decision, am I going to stick to my old church
or am I going to do what I know is right?
And it's a leap of faith.
All your friends, all your family are at that old church, and sometimes, you know what,
you make decisions to serve God, it might be a financial cost to you.
It might be a tough choice to make, but if you're going to serve God, you know what,
you can't just stay in Moab.
You're not going to serve God in Moab.
Ruth makes this choice and it means that she has to work a job.
Now is it sinful for her to work a job and provide?
No that's what she has to do to provide.
Now look, Lord willing for ladies that they can live underneath the authority of their
parents and their parents can provide for them until they reach that stage, but the
reality is not everybody's in that situation.
And if you are not in that situation, biblically speaking, being more godly would be working
for yourself and providing if you're not able to, you know, have your husband provide 100%
or your family.
Look, it's not wrong for her to work.
That's actually the right thing according to Ruth chapter two, okay?
Verse 15, and we see how God blesses her.
Notice this verse 15, and when she was risen up to glean, Boaz commanded his young men
saying, let her glean even among the sheaves in reproach or not, and let fall also some
of the handfuls of purpose for her, and leave them that she may glean them and rebuke her
not.
So it's saying here in Ruth two, because God had a system where you basically could get
the leftovers that were not taken from the farmland, right?
So basically you have the leftover gulai, the leftover prutus, the leftover whatever
that's out in the field, and you're able to glean the corners of the field.
Here's the thing though, you're not gonna get the best, right?
If somebody's getting all of the fruit out, they're gonna leave the ones that are wrinkled,
like those grapes that are wrinkled that nobody really wants to eat.
So you're able to provide financially, but you're not gonna get the best.
But see what Boaz says is he tells his men, you know what I want you to do?
I want you to just kind of accidentally drop some fruit and vegetables for her.
I want you to accidentally drop some grains.
So basically it's really easy.
She's just kind of going along her day and there's the food, okay?
This is an example of God providing for someone in a difficult situation.
God provides for her financially when every day by faith she's trusting we're gonna be
able to bring home food to eat tonight.
I mean, this is a daily trusting in God that your food's gonna be provided.
In 2021, very few of us are in this situation where we literally wake up and say, I hope
I have something to eat tonight.
Now I'm not saying everybody's rich, but the reality is we're a lot more rich compared
to Ruth and Naomi here, right?
We have something to eat, right?
Verse number 17, so she gleaned in the field until even and beat out that she had gleaned
and it was about an ephah of barley.
And she took it up and went into the city and her mother-in-law saw what she had gleaned.
And she brought forth and gave to her that she had reserved after she was sufficed.
And her mother-in-law said unto her, okay?
Now I want you to understand the tone of the voice of Naomi.
And her mother-in-law said unto her, where hast thou gleaned today?
She's shocked.
Why?
Because Boaz made it very easy to get really a lot of stuff, barley and vegetables and
fruit and she gets so much more and so much better quality and Naomi shocked, right?
Where hast thou gleaned today and where wrought is thou?
Blessed be he that did take knowledge of thee.
And she showed her mother-in-law with whom she had wrought and said, the man's name with
whom I wrought today is Boaz.
So she's shocked that she got so much stuff.
Go to Ruth 3, Ruth chapter 3.
Ruth 3.
There's many ways as a woman you can prepare yourself financially before you're married.
And one thing is just don't spend up all your money on shopping every week, right?
Because here's what all of you ladies think.
Well, yeah, you know, I spend all this money on shopping, but here's the thing.
Once I get married, I'll just stop.
Really?
That's going to happen, right?
I mean, many men in this room say, I wish that were the case, right?
It's like, no, if you're doing that all the time now, guess what?
When you get married, it's not going to just stop immediately.
It's just like, you know, like you, you spend 150,000 pesos on a dress.
It's like, what in the world, right?
And it's just like, you know, realize you can prepare for this stage now and it might
not seem like a lot.
You say, man, I was able to save a thousand pesos this week.
It's not a, it's not a lot.
No, actually that's a lot when you add it up every week.
I mean, if we're talking five years down the road, a thousand per week, 50,000 plus in
a year, and then over five years, 250,000 pesos, yeah, that's actually a lot of money.
And I'll tell you what, and here's the reality.
I'm not sitting here saying that I was perfect at this before I was married, but I like probably
every married person, I'd say, I wish I had spent less when I was single.
I wish, you know, I had not been tempted.
I wish my God wasn't my belly sometimes going to restaurants, man, I want this food, right?
Because that adds up.
I mean, it slowly adds up over time.
And I'll tell you what, when you get married and have kids, you're going to wish, you're
going to wish you had that money to spend on them.
Verse 11 of Ruth 3, verse 11 in Ruth 3, and now my daughter, fear not, I will do to thee
all that thou requirest, for all the city of my people doth know that thou art a virtuous
woman.
Did you know that Ruth is the only woman in the Bible who's ever called virtuous?
I'm not sure if you realize that because we think of the virtuous woman in Proverbs 31,
but the only woman called virtuous in the Bible is actually Ruth.
And she's actually a single woman, her husband has died and she's working to provide her
means.
And you know what that shows you is women can be virtuous before they're married.
And what I would say is this, if you're not virtuous before you're married, you're probably
not going to be virtuous after you get married.
Now I'm not saying that can't change, but I'm just saying, having this idea, I'm going
to become the virtuous woman when I get married.
Ruth was virtuous before she was married.
Why would you wait until you get married?
And why do you really think that you're just automatically going to change when you do
get married?
It's not going to happen like that.
Things take time.
Okay, go to Proverbs 31, Proverbs 31.
You know, here's another reality.
And this is especially true in the US, I know where people relocate to churches because
there's good Baptist churches in the US, but you know, they're still not necessarily exactly
like us, but they're right on salvation.
They do some soul winning and stuff like that.
But many people kind of get frustrated at their churches for either false doctrine or
just some various problems they see, and they want to relocate.
There's just a problem.
They don't have any money saved to relocate because it's expensive to relocate, right?
When we relocated our family to California, it's like looking at my bank account every
day, I'm like, man, we are losing money very quickly right now.
It's like, this is a step of faith.
Well, here's the thing, sometimes you can't take steps of faith because you're not prepared.
You literally put yourself into a position where you just can't make that decision, right?
Because you can't just move to an area and just say, man, I don't have any money.
I don't have a place to stay.
I'll just trust the church is going to provide.
It's like, and look, I've seen people that have done that.
I remember there's somebody who's not at that church anymore, but in Sacramento, California,
they just showed up one day.
It's like, man, I don't have any money.
I'm homeless.
It's like, can you guys and it's like, you know, you couldn't have saved up at least
a little bit of money, right?
But here's the thing.
It's tough to make decisions like this.
You want to be prepared so you're able to do that.
Notice Proverbs 31 verse 10, Proverbs 31 verse 10, who can find a virtuous woman for her
price is far above rubies.
And the Bible is saying, you know, finding a virtuous woman is very difficult, right?
I mean, it's easier to find, you know, basically a ruby is the sort of analogy being made.
It's that precious.
It's that hard, right?
And, you know, for godly ladies looking for a godly husband, I'm sure they'd say the opposite.
Now, it might not seem like that to us because there's a lot of godly people here, but you
know, there's like, what is it like 13 million?
How many people live in Metro Manila?
More than 10 million, right?
I mean, a lot of people live in Metro Manila.
It's like, this is really a small amount of people, not even a lot of people aren't even
from Metro Manila here, right?
So it's like, when you really think about it, actually, it's really not that high of
a percentage.
So you can see why the Bible is saying, you know, it's a very difficult thing to find.
Who can find a virtuous woman for a price as far above rubies?
The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her.
Now, sometimes we read over these verses and we just kind of think in general, hey, her
husband can trust her.
And that is one application, but what is the direct application the Bible is saying here
that the heart of her husband doth safely trust in her?
So that he shall have no need of spoil.
What's that saying?
Well, think about taking the spoils from your enemy in a war that the Bible speaks about.
It's saying he can trust that his wife won't use up all their money.
That's the direct thing that's really being stated in verse 11.
He's trusting the fact that, you know what, I can trust my wife that she's not going to
spend up every single cent that we have, okay?
And the Bible's saying that's actually a pretty rare thing.
And you say, why?
Well, because most people, they just kind of spend whatever they have.
It's like, hey, I made 5,000 pesos, I spend 5,000 pesos, right?
I made 20,000 pesos, I spend 20,000 pesos.
You know, I mean, even people that make a lot of money, they tend to just spend every
cent that they have.
I mean, it's like a running joke with athletes.
You look at guys like Mike Tyson, who made like 50 million or $100 million and he lost
it all.
And then they have these charts, what did they spend it on?
It's like $50,000 for a tiger.
It's like people spend their money on something.
That's just the way it works.
But it says the husband can safely trust her because she's not just spending everything.
That's the context, okay?
Now go to 1 Corinthians 14, 1 Corinthians 14.
One aspect of marriage is just being financially ready.
And you know, here's the thing, if you sit here and say, I agree with that preaching,
that makes sense, realize that in the next couple of weeks, you won't just magically
have like 20,000 pesos saved up.
This is something you have to believe and take a stand on and be very strict with yourself
day after day after day.
So you can look down the road and say, okay, now I have 20,000 pesos saved up because you're
not going to save that up in a couple of weeks.
But honestly, saving a little bit here and a little bit there, it will add up over time
and you're not going to regret that, okay?
One thing is being financially ready.
Another thing is being spiritually ready, right?
When people are single, they want to get married, but ask yourself this question, are you spiritually
ready to be married?
Or is it going to be a disaster getting married?
Because here's the thing, you think, you that are single right now, you think in the back
of your mind, hey, when I get married, all the stresses will be gone, I'll just be eternally
happy, everything's going to be great.
How about doing a 180 there, right?
Now look, it's a joy being married.
It's a joy having kids, but no married person, if they're honest and sincere, is going to
say that it's easy.
It takes work.
It takes work to have a good marriage, it takes work to have a good family.
This is not something that's easy and here's the thing, when you get married, there's joy,
there's excitement, but you know what?
There's also going to be fights from time to time.
There's also going to be problems from time to time.
It's not just everything's perfect, you're never upset, you always just agree.
It's like, that's just not the way it works, okay?
So here's the thing, if you're not spiritually ready to get married, I mean, you just might
marry into a nightmare then, just fight after fight after fight after fight, prepare yourself
spiritually before you're married.
Now that doesn't mean all the problems magically disappear because all of us have fights that
are married, right?
I'm not going to stand up here and say, my wife and I are always happy, we're never upset
with each other, we never disagree, right?
Two became one and it's like, never any problems.
No, I'm not going to lie to you here today, right?
I mean, marriage can be difficult.
Marriage has problems.
It's certainly a blessing, but at the same time, it's a new phase of life that you're
learning how to deal with that phase and both husband and wife are going to make a lot of
mistakes.
Make sure you're spiritually ready to get married.
1 Corinthians 14, verse 34, 1 Corinthians 13, verse 34.
One aspect of being spiritually ready to get married is just simply knowledge of the Bible.
Because many questions will come up in marriage and you're not necessarily sure, but if you
have knowledge of the Bible, then you're going to realize what the answer is.
If you don't have the knowledge of the Bible, you might take the world's advice and make
mistakes, right?
1 Corinthians 14, verse 34, let your women keep silence in the churches for it is not
permitted unto them to speak, but they are commanded to be under obedience as also saith
the law.
Now the Bible says here in verse 34 that the women are supposed to keep silence in the
church.
You say, what does that mean, brother Stuckey?
It says for it is not permitted unto them to speak.
Does that mean when I walk inside the church building, I can't say hello to people?
I just got to keep my mouth shut.
Does it mean I can't sing during the singing?
And look, I'm sure there are churches that take a really strange stance on something
like that.
But that's not what the Bible is saying.
The context is basically when the preaching or teaching of the word of God is done.
And just as we don't have women behind the pulpit to preach a sermon, right?
When it comes to basically saying, I agree with the sermon, what are we talking about?
Amen.
That's right, brother Stuckey, right?
Getting behind the preacher and saying, you agree with that.
And the Bible says, you know what?
At that point during the preaching and teaching of God's word, it's not for women to be basically
saying I agree with that or saying, amen, right?
Now you say, brother Stuckey, I disagree with that.
Well, you can come to your own conclusion and interpretation.
I encourage you to read 1 Corinthians 14 and you're going to see it's in the context of
when the preaching and teaching is being done.
And you say, why is this?
Well, it says, and if they will learn anything, let them ask their husbands at home.
For it is a shame for women to speak in the church, okay?
Now if a woman is not married, probably asking the father for the spiritual advice if she's
not sure would be the answer there.
But if she is married, asking her husband, you say, what's your point?
Here's my point.
You're a guy in this room, you're married or you're not married.
Look, if your wife asks you questions about the Bible because she wants to follow, she
says, you know what?
I believe in 1 Corinthians 14.
I want to follow what the Bible says.
I want to ask my husband for advice.
And then your answer is, let me see if brother Stuckey preached on that sermon.
I think he preached a sermon eight months ago.
If you listen for an hour, the answer is somewhere in there.
That's a bad answer, my friends.
That's a really bad answer.
If every time your wife has advice, you're just like, or questions, you're like, I'm
not sure.
It's like, you know what?
That's not good, my friend.
She asked you, hey, you know, the book of Matthew, is it Old Testament or New Testament?
Let me see if brother Stuckey's preached on this before.
I'm not sure, right?
It's like, no, you need to be ready to answer those questions.
And what that means is having knowledge of the Bible.
And as the husband, you're not just the financial provider, you are also the head spiritually
of that home.
And you need to know what the answers to those questions are.
Go to Deuteronomy 6, Deuteronomy chapter 6, Deuteronomy 6.
Here's the thing, though.
When it comes to having people ask you questions, you don't know what the questions are going
to be ahead of time.
This is not like a test in college where they give you like a sample test of the questions
and everything, and you're studying for those questions or similar types of questions.
You don't know what the question could be.
It could be anything.
So here's the thing, you need to have knowledge of the Bible.
That doesn't mean that you're always going to have the answer.
But you know, you ought to strive to learn more and more so you can have a lot of those
answers, right?
Deuteronomy 6, verse 5, and thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart and
with all thy soul and with all thy might.
And these words which I command thee this day shall be in thine heart.
What is that talking about?
Well, it's talking about basically memorizing the word of God, hiding it in your heart.
And thou shalt teach them diligently onto thy children, and shalt talk of them when
thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down,
and when thou risest up, okay?
It says we're supposed to diligently teach onto our children the word of God, okay?
So here's the thing, if our kids ask us a question, like, Dad, why is it that we don't
drink alcohol?
If your answer is the Bible says we shouldn't do it, that's not a good answer.
A good answer would be, well, thus saith the Lord, and show them where the Bible says it.
Show them why it's wrong, okay?
Because if your answer is just like the Bible says it, you're teaching them to just trust
you without actually knowing what the Bible says.
But if you show them Proverbs 23 or Proverbs 31 and explain it, then they're gonna be like,
okay, thus saith the Lord, I know what the Bible says.
And we wanna teach our children that the answers are found in this book.
And so when we show them those verses, they know, hey, I determine what's right and wrong
based on not my feelings or what I was taught, but what does the Bible say?
You need to know what the Bible says.
Turn in your Bible to Deuteronomy 17.
Deuteronomy 17.
Deuteronomy chapter 17.
Look, this is why I deeply encourage people to read the Bible for themselves.
This is why we didn't just do the January New Testament reading challenge, but if you
finish the Bible in 2021, we're gonna give you a prize, right?
I wanna try to encourage.
Why are we made Bible reading charts?
Why?
Because we wanna encourage you to be reading the Bible every day and to know what the Bible
says.
And look, it might take you several years.
You say, Brother Stuckey, man, I don't know if I could ever know as much as you do.
Well, I mean, I've been saved since I was 18 years old.
I've been reading the Bible since I was 18 years old.
I mean, I started small, but you go from reading it once a year to two, three, four times or
whatever.
After a long time and then after you hear a lot of sermons, the puzzle pieces click
together and you're like, man, I'm understanding this.
Now, look, the Bible is an infinite book, so absolutely there could be questions that
come up that I don't know the answer to.
I'm not claiming I know everything, but I want you to realize if you're new at reading
the Bible, if you just start today or start this year in two, three, four, five years,
you're gonna be like, man, I know so much more than I used to know, right?
It takes time, but you're gonna get there, okay?
Deuteronomy 17, verse 18, and it shall be when he sitteth upon the throne of his kingdom
that he shall write him a copy of this law and a book out of that which is before the
priests, the Levites.
And it shall be with him and he shall read therein some of the days of his life.
He shall read therein when he's not too tired or not too busy, you know what it says?
All the days of his life.
That's gonna include some days where, you know what, you're tired.
Some days where you're busy.
And what the Bible says is I don't make an exception for a day when you don't feel like
reading the Bible.
Oh, just skip today and read twice tomorrow.
Doesn't work that way.
No, you need to read every single day.
You say why?
Well, how often do you eat?
Say, brother, I'm just gonna skip, you know, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and just eat four
times as much on Thursday.
Is that how you eat?
No, you eat every single day, don't you?
And then Job says, I've esteemed the words of God more than my necessary food.
There's a link between the spiritual food and the physical food.
And you eat physically every day.
But then for some of you, maybe you go home today and your Bible's got dust in it.
Dust on it, right?
You're like, man, where is my Bible?
It's like, you know, there's stories they always say about this where preachers will
visit houses.
And I don't do this, but they're funny stories, though, I don't know if they're real or not.
But they visit houses and everything.
And then all of a sudden, then, you know, the Bible has, like, dust on it and everything.
They're like this, and there's dust spraying.
It's like, man, right?
It's like, no, you need to read the Bible every single day.
That is what the Bible teaches.
Go to Proverbs 31.
Proverbs 31.
And one thing I've found, just as kind of a case study with myself, when I'm really
reading the Bible a lot, I'm in a good mood.
Right?
Like, if I wake up and I get a lot of Bible reading in and I spend time with God, I'm
usually in a good mood the whole day.
But let's say I wake up a little bit late or I'm a little bit lazy and I don't really
read the Bible.
I'm more grouchy.
You say, why does it work that way?
Well, that's just the way it works.
Because here's the thing.
You got the old man and the new man.
And no offense, but the old man for all of us just isn't really that great.
The new man is great, not the old man.
And when you're not reading the Bible and you don't have that personal time with God,
you're going to walk in the flesh.
You're going to walk in the old man.
And what is the flesh filled with?
The sins of the world, the worldliness of the world.
Guess what?
You're not going to be in that good of a mood.
Why?
Living a sinful life doesn't make you happy.
It makes you a miserable person that complains all the time.
Proverbs 31 verse one, the words of King Lemuel, the prophecy that his mother taught him.
So here's an example with knowledge of the mom teaching her son.
And truly, in most situations, the mom is going to spend more time with the kids than
the father.
That's usually the way it's going to work.
So here's the thing.
It's not just your husband knows the word of God, you as wives, you need to know the
word of God.
You need to be able to teach your children.
The prophecy that his mother taught him, what my son and what the son of my womb and what
the son of my vows.
Give not thy strength unto women, nor thy ways to that which destroyeth kings.
And she says, you know, talking to Solomon, don't give your strength unto women.
That destroys kings, and then other things that will destroy kings.
Now, you know, I wish Solomon had actually listened to this advice, because obviously
he didn't listen to this advice at all.
And that also teaches us that, you know, the reality is that even if mom and dad are teaching
good things, if they didn't actually do it themselves, obviously, we know the story of
Bathsheba and David and David had many wives also.
The reality is kids will model what their parents do.
So she's teaching great stuff.
But unfortunately, the sins of the past sometimes can creep up, right?
And so that's what we see here.
Verse four, it is not for kings o' Lemuel, it is not for kings to drink wine nor for
princes strong drink, lest they drink and forget the law and pervert the judgment of
any of the afflicted.
So according to verses four and five, if you are a king, you are too good to drink wine.
If you're a king, you're too good to drink strong drink, right?
What will happen if you drink alcohol?
You forget the law.
You forget God's law.
You forget just the law that's out there, what's considered right and wrong or what
will get you in trouble, you just forget it.
Look, people when they're drunk, they do things they would never ever do if they were sober.
I mean, how many stories do you read about people getting murdered, people getting raped,
people drunk and driving, crashing into someone and killing someone?
It happens all the time.
I knew many people from my school in high school that they died from drunk and driving
or they choked on their own vomit when they got drunk.
Many people destroy their lives due to alcohol.
You say, but brother Saki, I've seen those commercials, right?
I mean, those commercials, I mean, if I drink this beer, I'll become really strong and handsome.
All the girls will like me and everything and everything's going to be great in life.
Is that reality?
Is that what the Bible says?
Is that really what happens in this world?
Because all of us know stories of people that died due to being idiots because they were
drunk and they did things they would have never done when they were sober.
You say, why?
Because alcohol gives you boldness to do what's wrong.
Be not drunk with wine, but be filled with the Spirit.
That's what the Bible says.
See, the Holy Spirit gives you boldness to do what's right.
Alcohol, according to the Bible, gives you boldness to do what's wrong.
That's what the Bible teaches.
And she's telling her son, you know what?
You're too good to drink alcohol.
Look, this is what I would say to Verity Baptist Church.
You're too good to drink alcohol.
You're too good to drink wine.
You're too good to drink strong drink.
Right?
Now, look, I preached a couple months ago why it's wrong and I went through all the
arguments that people try to use against us, but I would just say this.
You're too good to drink alcohol.
And what she's teaching her son is this.
You know what?
Alcohol is for the losers.
You're a king.
And if you're saved, according to the Bible, you are kings and priests unto God.
And God looks at you and says, you know what?
You are too good to drink alcohol.
That's what the Bible teaches.
And this is what it teaches in the next couple verses.
Look, give strong drink, verse six, give strong drink unto him that is ready to perish.
Someone who's ready to die, give them strong drink.
That's what the Bible's saying.
Now, does that mean, oh, man, you know, I got stabbed with a knife.
Just give me alcohol.
Is that what the Bible's trying to teach?
Right?
What it's teaching is the people that are ready to perish in the context, they're the
people that are the drunks.
They're destroying their kidneys.
They're destroying the livers, their livers.
She's saying, you know what?
You're too good to drink.
Let the homeless bums losers drink away their sorrows.
That's what it's saying.
That's the context, right?
I mean, have you ever gone soul winning in the morning, 10 in the morning, and you go
to a neighborhood and you got like the neighborhood drunk?
It's 10 in the morning, got a bottle of booze in his hands, and he's just stumbling around.
I can pretty much guarantee that person's not living a long life.
I can pretty much guarantee that person's got health problems coming.
I mean, when you're drunk at 10 in the morning and look, what are you?
You're ready to perish.
You're ready to die.
I mean, you're literally standing between life and death physically every single day
due to the alcohol that you're drinking.
That's what the Bible's teaching.
Give strong drink unto him that is ready to perish and wine unto those that be of heavy
hearts.
So if you're sad, just drink alcohol, it cheers the heart.
Is that what the Bible's saying?
No, no.
According to the Bible, those that drink are miserable, and the reason why they have heavy
hearts is alcohol, and she's saying, Solomon, you're too good to drink.
Let the people that are just these drunks that are always sad and depressed and miserable,
let them drink away their sorrows, right?
Because look, people that are drunks, they're miserable.
They hate their lives.
That's why they're drunk all the time.
They want to forget what's going on in life, because if you get drunk, you don't remember
what happens.
You're going to wake up, you're going to sleep for a while, you don't even remember what
happens.
Look, I don't want to just have my whole life be gone and not know what's going on.
No, I actually like my life.
I actually like the life that God's given me, but them, they want to just forget about
everything in life.
It's like, man, my life is terrible.
I'm miserable.
I'm just going to drink.
So they don't have to remember it.
Why are they miserable?
Because they drink.
Let them drink and forget his poverty.
Why is he poor?
Well, it's pretty hard to have money when you're a drunk.
Pretty hard to be good at work when you're a drunk, right?
And so why is he poor?
Why is he ready to perish?
Why is he miserable?
Because he's drinking, right?
Because he's a drunk.
That's why.
And then it says this, let him drink and forget his poverty and remember his misery no more.
Let him drink away his sorrows.
But you know what, Solomon, you're too good to do that.
Now I, for the life of me, do not understand how people take this passage and they try
to use this to justify drinking because it sounds like drinking is for losers, according
to Bathsheba.
And that's reality.
And if you're in this room, the reality is you are too good to drink, right?
You that are saved and you have the Holy Spirit inside of you, look, you have better things
to do with your life than drink.
That's what the Bible is teaching.
So here's the thing, she's teaching this to her son.
It means she knows what the word of God says.
And here's the thing, when we go soul winning in a neighborhood and you see that neighborhood
drunk, that's a good time to teach your kids, hey, this is why you never touch that alcohol.
You say why?
Because that image will just be seared inside of that kid's head.
And that five year old, that six year old, that seven year old will see somebody whose
life is terrible.
And even though that they know the Bible says it, you know what, that image will be
seared in their head where they understand, yeah, you know what, I'm never drinking.
I'm going to destroy my life if I do this.
So one thing is just having knowledge of the Bible for men and women.
Another thing is to have strong character.
For both men and women, if you're going to get married, you want to have strong character.
And this takes time to develop.
Proverbs 31 verse 13, let's look at the wife, Proverbs 31 verse 13.
She seeketh wool and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.
She works willingly with her hands, sounds like she's staying busy.
Verse 18, she perceiveth that her merchandise is good, her candle goeth not out by night.
Now realize that in our modern day, we have electricity, but then once it gets dark outside,
it's going to be dark inside.
So they would generally have candles during the time when it's dark.
And so basically around 6 p.m., roughly it gets dark depending on the time of year and
your location.
So you would have a candle that's on, and then once you're ready to go to bed, you put
out that candle and you go to sleep.
And what it's saying is, yes, you know what, you work from in the morning till night, but
once it gets dark outside, that doesn't mean it's time to just goof off, right?
It's like her candle goeth not out by night, okay?
Verse 26, she openeth her mouth with wisdom, and in her tongue is the law of kindness.
She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.
She stays busy.
She's not idle.
Verse 30, favors deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall
be praised.
Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her own works praise her in the gates.
And it says if a woman works really hard, people are going to praise her for the work
that she does.
They're going to see the difference in the family and the husband and the kids.
They're going to praise her, right?
That's what the Bible teaches here.
And so here's the thing, verse 30 says, you know what, favors deceitful and beauty is
vain.
Now, look, by no means am I saying, hey, it doesn't matter whether you're attracted to
the person you're married to.
Look, that's here in 10 minutes, I'll preach about that, okay?
But here's the thing about this, it doesn't matter how attractive somebody is, that can
fade if they don't have character.
That's reality, right?
I mean, if somebody could be, I mean, the world will show you all these people that
are considered attractive and everything, but you know, if you met those people in real
life, you'd be like, man, right, in a cockadeer, disgusting, they'd be like an E piece to you,
right?
These celebrities, right?
I mean, it's just like, you know, if you actually met them in real life, though, that beauty
would fade away very quickly, right?
But you know, what will last is a woman that actually works hard, right?
That's what the Bible says.
So look, if you're a guy and you're single, you say, what sort of woman should I look
for?
A woman that works hard.
A woman that's working hard and not being idle.
You say, well, you know, once I get married, she's gonna work hard.
Good luck with that.
I mean, I don't really know what part of the Bible you would use to defend that other than
just inside your heart, right?
It's like, no, I mean, if you're looking for someone to marry, make sure they're a hard
worker.
Now, part of that is, hey, they're coming soul winning, they're reading the Bible.
I mean, if you're involved in the work of God, you know, you're staying busy.
That's a large part of it.
But if you're looking for someone, look at someone who's staying busy, not just kind
of sitting around and just goofing off.
And the same is true for ladies as well.
Marry a guy who's staying busy and working hard, because that's probably the guy who's
gonna work hard once you have a family, right?
That is what the Bible teaches.
Now turn in your Bible to 1 Corinthians 13, 1 Corinthians 13.
We'll get a few more places and we'll be done.
The second sermon is gonna be shorter, so we're gonna be just right on time after this
first sermon.
But the second sermon is gonna be a bit shorter, maybe.
Maybe.
All right, we're never doing Bible reading again, no, I'm just kidding.
So that's for the ladies.
What about for the husbands, right?
Well, 1 Corinthians 13 verse 11, 1 Corinthians 13 verse 11, when I was a child, I spake as
a child.
I understood as a child.
I thought as a child, but when I became a man, I put away childish things.
I think we would agree, if a guy's gonna get married, he better not be a child.
And I'm not talking about your age.
I'm talking about if your characteristic would be described as like he acts like a child.
So you're probably not ready to get married, right?
When you become a man, you put away childish things.
What does that mean?
Well, I mean, children like to play and have fun and goof off.
And their life is about them.
Parents pour their lives into their kids, and there's nothing wrong with that, but there's
gonna be a stage as they get older, they start needing to learn responsibilities and not
just play all the time.
And here's the reality.
You know, my son, every single day, he wants to just jump on the bed.
I asked him last night when we got home from Pampanga, I said, what do you want?
You want pillow fight, jump on the bed, or blanket battle?
He's like, jump on the bed was his choice last night, and then we switched to pillow
fight.
Look, here's the thing, he would love to just play all day long.
And I'll be honest, if I wasn't busy, I probably would too, right?
I mean, if life was really easy, it would be nice to just have fun all the time, but
you know, it doesn't work that way.
Life's not really easy.
Life takes work.
And here's the thing, we expect kids to act as children, but if you're gonna get married,
you gotta put away childish things.
Go to 1 Timothy 4.
1 Timothy 4.
First Timothy chapter 4.
You say, what kind of childish things should I put away if I'm gonna get married?
How about video games?
I mean, I don't think there's anything that fits something that you depict with being
for a child more than video games.
It's like, you know, if you're becoming a man, you're getting married, why not putting
away those video games?
Now I'm not sitting here saying that every video game is a sin to play, but I am saying
it's for kids.
It's not for adults.
I mean, playing video games with your whole...
I mean, look, let me just give you some advice, guys, because look, I know people that are
married whose husbands are like obsessed with video games.
It's like the biggest thing that drives them crazy.
It's the same thing as just watching sports all day, right?
Or playing video games all day, or just coming home and not spending any time with the family.
Look, that's what kids do, right?
When I was a kid, you get off school and what do you do?
You play backyard football and just have fun and watch TV till like 10 o'clock, you go
to bed, you wake up the next day.
That's what kids do.
When you're an adult, there's things that are more important, like spending time with
your wife, like spending time with your kids, right?
Another thing that's a bit childish for someone who gets married and has a family is to sit
around and watch sermons for four hours and not spend any time with your family, and look,
that might hit close to home to some people, but that's reality.
That's what you do before you're married.
Now, I'm not saying it's a sin to listen to a sermon, but here's what I'm saying.
The Bible does not command you to listen to extra preaching.
If you go to a church that's preaching the truth, you're hearing the truth, you're getting
motivated, you're learning the Word of God.
Am I the greatest preacher in the world?
No, I'm not, but I am teaching the Word of God.
But you know what the Bible does command you to do?
To spend time with your family, to lay down your life for your wife and your kids.
Here's the thing, sitting around listening to sermons for four hours and not spending
time with your wife and kids, you know what's going to happen?
You're going to cause your wife and kids to resent this kind of preaching because this
kind of preaching is causing you not to spend time with the family.
That's reality.
You want to get your wife and kids on, because here's the thing, this kind of preaching and
this kind of church, people that want to serve God and love God, they will love this church.
And it's not just because of me, it's not just because of the preaching, you will not
find a single place here in Luzon with this many people gathered together that love God.
That's a fact.
No question about that.
But here's the thing, if all your free time is just spent on just listening to sermons
because you're so obsessed with the new IFB, here's the thing, you're going to cause your
family to start to resent this kind of preaching.
If you want to get them on board, you need to have the proper balance on things.
Look, if you have time to listen to extra preaching, go for it.
It's not wrong.
But here's the thing, if you don't spend any time with your family and you just listen
to preaching, that is wrong, according to the Bible.
And that's something that people do before they're married or when they're young, they
just listen to stuff for hours.
It's like, well, once you get married, you have more important things to do.
That's reality.
First Timothy 4, verse 11, these things command and teach, let no man despise thy youth.
You know, I talked about recently the context is don't give people an opportunity to despise
your youth, but be thou an example of the believers in word and conversation and charity
and spirit and faith and purity.
Look, when you're ready to get married or you want to get married, you know what?
You need to develop your character so people don't have an opportunity to despise your
youth.
You need to know the Bible, you need to have strong character, you need to take life seriously.
You say why?
Because life is serious.
It's not easy.
Go to Song of Solomon, chapter one.
We're going to close up.
Song of Solomon, chapter one, and look, I know that everybody just kind of automatically
assumes they're spiritually ready, but quite honestly, you might not be.
Prepare yourself now because look, marriage is more difficult than you think it is if
you're single.
Raising kids is more difficult than you think.
Just increase your stresses times 20, right?
I mean, you're just like, look, if you married and you have kids now, prepare for never ever,
ever having a week without any stress.
You will have some stress the rest of your life.
That's just the way, you know what, because here's the thing, you have young kids and
then they get sick and stuff, you get stressed out.
Husbands stressed out, the wife is stressed out.
Sometimes they might argue because of that.
That's the way it works.
So make sure you're spiritually ready.
Prepare yourself.
Part of that's knowledge of the Bible, memorize the Bible, go soul winning, learn the things
of God.
Prepare yourself spiritually for that stage of life.
Financially be ready.
Spiritually be ready.
And physically be ready, right?
Because here's the reality, okay?
As much as we say that, you know, beauty is vain, the virtues, here's the thing.
People marry someone they're attracted to.
I mean, that's just a fact, right?
Now I have this story from my friend who went to Bible college.
He went to House Anderson College, which is the perhaps the most famous college in the
US, but for Bible college, at least of independent Baptists.
And this guy was teaching on marriage.
And this is the worst advice, the worst thing you could ever do.
And it's such a great example of really saying something, Bobo, that I bring it up like every
year.
I'm going to mention it at some point, right?
And this guy was trying to use an example about find a godly woman and everything.
And you know, he asked his wife to come up, right?
And he's in front of the classroom and he's like, you know, you see this woman here.
This is what he said.
I am not attracted to this woman.
I'm just like, but she's the godliest woman I know.
It's like, what in the world?
I mean, that's literally about the dumbest thing I've ever heard anybody say.
Because I mean, even if you think that, I mean, why in the world would you be so dumb
to say it, right?
But it's just like, that's stupid though.
Because in the Bible, when you see people that are married, they praise their spouse
for how they look.
They're attracted to them.
Now here's the thing.
People are attracted to different types of people.
People are different, right?
The example I like to use, because it's so different in the US, is that in the US, you
know, everybody wants darker skin, right?
I mean, it's considered that having darker skin is more attractive.
And you know, why is that?
Because people don't like the way they're created.
They just always want to change it.
And yet here in the Philippines and other countries, oh, I wish my skin was lighter.
It's like, and it's like the exact opposite of the US.
I mean, in the US, it's like everybody wants darker skin.
Everybody wants to have, you know, a tan, right?
They want to be outside and have the sun hit them.
People literally pay to go to tanning beds, tanning salons, where they pay money to be
artificially tan and have this weird orange thing going on.
Right?
Have you ever seen pictures of bodybuilders?
I mean, that's what people do though.
Other people that aren't, they do that, they pay money to look darker.
And here's the thing.
I was raised in that culture.
So yeah, you know what?
I think I look more attractive when my skin's darker.
The darker, the better, right?
That's the way I was raised.
But here's my point.
People are attracted to different types of people.
I mean, there's so many different, I mean, people, God has made us different, but you
know what?
I do believe that God has made us to look attractive as people.
But we can actually change that by the way we take care of our body.
I mean, a great example in the Bible, the Bible says that, I believe it's Isaiah 5,
but it talks about the woman, her beauty being a fading flower in the context of drinking
alcohol.
And it tells us that if you drink alcohol, your beauty will be gone.
And let me tell you something.
For someone who went to college, I know that is certainly the case.
People that were very attractive when they were young, and then after a couple of years
you're like, and it's hard, I mean, because you know, they still sort of look the same,
but it's just like, man, their beauty just got sucked out of them.
But see, the Bible says that in Isaiah 5.
Her beauty is like a fading flower.
I mean, what about drug addicts?
Drug addicts destroy their body.
They look terrible.
Right?
I mean, if you become a drug addict, your beauty, your handsomeness or whatever, is
going to be gone.
That's the way it works.
The way we take care of our bodies, you know, we can affect how attractive we look.
I'm not standing up here saying, I've got a perfect diet.
But I am saying that, you know what, the healthier we eat, the more we exercise, the more we
avoid sinful habits, you know what, it will make you look more attractive.
And here's the thing, you know, when you're looking to get married, you know what, you
might find the perfect person, but they got to find the perfect person.
And people are not going to marry if they're not attracted to you, right?
Song of Solomon chapter one.
And I think it's good that God made us different and that God made all of us to find different
types of people attractive.
I think that's great.
But you want to take care of your body because that is a part of being prepared.
That is a large part.
You're going to marry someone you're attracted to.
Song of Solomon one verse eight, if thou know not, O thou fairest among women, right?
He looks at his wife and he considers her the most beautiful woman.
That doesn't necessarily mean she would have been the woman who won the beauty pageant.
He found her to be more attractive than anybody else.
And I believe he means it.
He found her to be very beautiful.
People are attracted to different types of people, right?
O thou fairest among women, the Bible says.
Verse nine, I have compared thee, O my love, to a company of horses and Pharaoh's chariots.
They say, Brother Stuckey, what does he mean by his wife's a horse, right?
I want this marriage advice, it's Valentine's Day, I want to do something special for my
wife.
Like what in the world?
You say, is it because horses are really muscular?
Like maybe his wife's like, you know, a bodybuilder type?
No, that's not what it's saying, right?
Well, I mean, think about this.
You know, he married the daughter of Pharaoh.
So basically, Pharaoh would have the greatest horses in the world, right?
The most beautiful and best and most expensive horses in the world.
And what he's saying is, you know what, you are the best.
That's what he's saying in verse nine.
He's not comparing his wife to a horse.
He's saying, you know what, you grew up around the greatest, you know, horses in the world.
It's like, you're the best, right?
Now here's the thing, guys, when you give compliments, be very careful.
Write it down first, practice in the mirror, do what you got to do.
You want to make sure because, you know what, if you kind of fumble this a little bit, that's
going to end up bad for you, right?
It's like, you're the most beautiful e-piece in the world.
It's like, not good, right?
Verse 10, thy cheeks are comely with rows of jewels, thy neck with chains of gold.
Verse 15, verse 15, behold thou art fair, my love, behold thou art fair, thou hast doves
eyes, behold thou art fair, my beloved, yea pleasant, also our bed is green.
They find each other attractive and you know, a large part of this is just taking care of
our bodies.
Now, honestly, a large part of it is just living a godly life.
Because sins make you less attractive, drinking, doing drugs, video games, but honestly, even
other sinful sorts of habits, I'm sure that, you know, you have side effects of other sinful
habits, whether it's getting more wrinkles or things such as this, living godly will
help you to some degree, for sure, it will especially help you as you avoid the sins
of the world.
But you know what, you want to try to take care of your body because, you know, you want
to look good for the person that you marry.
And the reality is that is part of being married, that you're going to marry someone you're
attracted to, I hope, right?
Find a godly person, but make sure you're attracted to them, right?
And then they're going to marry someone that they're attracted to as well.
So what are we talking about here today?
Well, if you're looking for the right person, instead of focusing on the person you want,
you should focus on yourself being ready and prepared.
Part of that is being financially ready.
And you know what, that might take, you know, just week by week over a couple years, slowly
you become more ready.
Physically being ready, and physically being ready.
And look, when it comes to finding the right person, you know, I'm not going to be one
of these people that sits here and says, man, it's so easy, and because sometimes people
get married, they try to make it seem like everything's just so easy, because they're
on the other side.
No, I mean, it's hard to meet the right person.
Something to pray about, but it's something to prepare yourself personally for that right
person.
Let's close in a word of prayer.
Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for allowing us to be here today.
We ask you to help us to apply this sermon to our lives.
For those of us that are married, we can be reminded of things that the Bible teaches
and things we know God, and help us to have a wonderful day here.
In Jesus' name we pray, amen.