but if not, it's better to actually go to that person
so it can get resolved, okay?
And it also says, go and tell him his fault
between the and him alone.
What that means is you don't go around
and telling everybody else at church about it
because that just makes it explosive, right?
You wanna try to restore, you wanna reconcile the problem,
so you don't wanna just go and tell everybody about it.
It's better you can just deal with it
and then everyone can move on.
But if you start bringing everybody into it,
then all of a sudden, it becomes a major issue, right?
Like if we had an issue at our church
where everybody's aware of it,
it's like people are gonna be split down the middle
what their opinion is.
And then you've got a major problem in church.
It's better just having the small group of people,
you deal with it, and then you move on.
So point number one is this.
If we have situations, one thing we need is godly sorrow.
Godly sorrow.
And what godly sorrow is is sorrow
that results in a change, okay?
Godly sorrow to the situation.
And this is a situation we're talking about
where one trespasses against another.
It's not where it's basically like whose opinion is right,
but basically one side has done wrong to the other,
and the side that did wrong needs to apologize
for whatever it is.
Now go to 2 Corinthians 7.
2 Corinthians 7.
And I wanna show you the difference
between godly sorrow and worldly sorrow
according to the Bible,
because there's different types of sorrow in the Bible.
Yesterday I accidentally got my sermon wet.
I don't have my printer yet here, so it kinda got soaked.
So I can't really read the words.
I'm planning to let my heart
just kinda guide me into what to say, right?
I think it will lead me in the right direction.
So 2 Corinthians 7.
2 Corinthians 7.
It says this in verse eight.
For though I made you sorry with a letter, okay?
Now what letter is Paul talking about?
He's talking about the letter of 1 Corinthians
as we know it, the book of 1 Corinthians.
So obviously 1 Corinthians was written,
and then 2 Corinthians is written afterwards, right?
And 1 Corinthians, basically Paul is ripping apart
the Church of Corinth,
because the Church of Corinth had a lot of problems.
They had problems with a man was with his father's wife.
I mean, that's beyond anything
I've ever heard of in church.
There's envy, strife, divisions, they were not.
I mean, that was the whole basis
of our church problem series
was the Church of 1 Corinthians.
The only thing that the Church of Corinth
didn't seem to struggle with was salvation.
They had all kinds of sin,
but Paul never questioned their salvation.
The only church he questions their salvation
is the Church of Galatia,
because they're changing what they're believing, right?
That shows us that sin is not
what would make you question someone's salvation,
because we're all sinners, okay?
But the Church of Corinth had a lot of problems,
and he wrote the letter to rebuke them,
because they had a problem that they weren't dealing with.
And I want you to realize,
when it gets to the point where a guy
is in a relationship with his father's wife,
I've never heard of anything that bad at a church before.
Right, I mean, that's pretty much as bad.
I mean, the only thing I can think of worse
is if your preacher is an open homosexual,
and that's not dealt with, right?
But a guy is with his father's wife,
that's a major problem.
And he made them sorry with the letter.
Why did he make them sorry?
Well, he rebuked them,
and they felt bad about it when they got rebuked,
because it's not fun getting rebuked.
For though I made you sorry with the letter,
I do not repent.
Now, what does he mean?
He's saying, I made you sorry,
but I don't change my mind about writing that letter.
I made the right decision.
I do not repent.
I do is present tense.
I do not repent, though I did repent.
You say, what in the world?
Is Paul bipolar?
Is he schizophrenic?
What's he talking about?
Well, he's saying, I do not repent presently,
but I did repent past tense.
You say, what does that mean?
He's saying when he wrote the letter,
after he wrote it, he kind of changed his mind.
Like, did I make the right decision is what he's saying.
He's like, I dealt with it pretty harshly,
but did I make the right decision?
And here's the thing.
He kind of changed his mind after he wrote it.
Like, man, maybe I should have been a little nicer
or whatever.
But then he's saying, presently, I do not repent.
Well, why does he not change his mind now?
Well, this is what it says.
For I perceive that the same epistle hath made you sorry,
though it were but for a season.
See, he kind of changed his mind
because they felt really bad about it.
Did I make the right decision?
But the Church of Corinth, they were sad for a season
because they end up resolving the issue,
and then they can move on.
And it says in verse number 9, now I rejoice.
So presently, I am happy.
I rejoice, not that you were made sorry.
He's saying, I'm not happy that I made you feel bad.
Let me explain something to you as a preacher.
If you ever become a pastor or if you preach,
your goal should not be to make people feel terrible.
My goal is to get people to cry.
Well, you know what?
You're never getting a chance to preach then.
Your goal is not to try to preach the most hardcore sermon
to make people feel miserable.
Paul had to rebuke the Church of Corinth
and he didn't want to do it.
You say, why?
He had love inside of his heart.
He cared about people.
He had to rebuke the Church of Corinth,
but he didn't want to do it, okay?
When I preach hard and preach against sin,
I'm not trying to make people feel miserable,
but my job is not to be your best friend.
I want to be friends with the people of this church,
but my job is not to be your best friend.
My job is to actually teach you the word of God
and help you be a Godly Christian.
That is what my goal is.
Now, if I can be your friend, praise the Lord,
I love going soul-willing with people,
fellowshipping and talking about life,
but my number one job and goal is not to be your best friend
but to teach you to serve God, okay?
And here's the thing, you know what?
It's not as hard for me, I guess,
because I don't have to worry about getting a paycheck
from everybody, so I can just say, you know what?
I'm just going to try to help people's lives.
I'm not dependent on people's money
in order to have my own survival.
A lot of churches, they just want to be your friend
because they just want your money,
and sometimes it hurts when somebody rebukes you,
but that shows that person cares about you.
I mean, if I didn't care about you,
I'd let you do whatever you want.
I'd never rebuke your sin.
I'd just say God loves you,
has a wonderful plan for your life,
and this church would be 10 times the size it is.
Now, probably none of you would be at this church,
and if you would be at this church like that,
then there's something wrong with you, right?
But, you know, the church would be bigger
if I was a little bit nicer, but my job is to help you.
And look, I want you to realize,
we have a lot of salvations from our church.
We have a decent-sized church,
but you know, we're not a mighty army of 500 people,
but we still get a lot of people saved.
We're doing a lot of Bible reading.
We're doing a lot of memorization.
My job is to help you learn to serve God, okay,
and help you get on the right path in life.
So Paul says, you know what, I rejoice,
but not because I made you feel miserable,
but that you sorrowed to repentance.
He said, I'm happy, and I rejoice now
because when I wrote that letter,
it made you feel bad, and it caused a change in you,
because what repentance is is a change,
and the context tells you what that change is.
Paul says, I wrote 1 Corinthians,
and you sorrowed to repentance.
There was a change at the church.
I mean, if you read your Bible
just kind of straight through,
1 Corinthians, he rips them apart.
2 Corinthians, he doesn't really rip them, right?
I mean, the church is pretty good in 2 Corinthians, right?
I mean, the church has fixed the problem,
and they're serving God,
and he has nice things to say, by and large,
and he's talking about how, hey, you know what,
we restored the problem.
Now make sure you don't hold anything against that guy,
right?
Then it says this, for you are made sorry
after a godly manner that you might receive damage
by us in nothing.
Now when it says you're made sorry after a godly manner,
the indication is that there's like an ungodly manner,
which the Bible calls worldly.
There's a godly and a worldly sorrow, okay?
Look, when people get in trouble, they're always sorry.
If you ever notice serial killers that get caught,
it's like, oh, forgive me,
I feel really bad that I killed 25 people.
It's just like, well, yeah, you got caught.
You wanna get out of jail.
You don't wanna get the death penalty, right?
But the proof of whether or not you have godly sorrow
or worldly sorrow is if there's a change.
That's what the Bible's gonna define, okay?
He says they had a godly manner,
and then he says this,
that you might receive damage by us in nothing.
Now what does that mean?
Well, Paul's saying this.
I'm a preacher of the word of God.
I've showed you what the Bible says.
If you don't apply it,
then actually you receive damage by my words
because you didn't apply it.
See, the words that are preached in a sermon
can either heal you or give you damage.
Heal you or give you a virus, right?
They can either heal you in terms of the fact
you hear the word of God and you make the changes,
or it can actually be a curse to you.
God's words are very good,
according to the book of Micah, if you do them.
If you don't do them, it's better off not hearing them.
I mean, look, if somebody is guilty of something
and it gets preached on and they hear the word of God
and they see what the Bible says,
here's the thing.
If they apply what's heard, then it's good for them.
It's healing.
If they don't apply it, it's actually bad, right?
I never understand, people that are at churches,
but they never really dive into serving God
because I'm like, man, you're better off
just going to some other church, right?
I mean, if you're gonna be at a church
where the word of God's preached
and you're shown how to live for God,
it's like, you know what, you're better off
just going to a different church
if you're not gonna apply it, right?
So Paul says, hey, you know what,
if you didn't make a change,
you'd receive damage by my words, is what he's saying.
Then it says in verse 10,
for godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation
not to be repented of,
but the sorrow of the world worketh death.
Now, I wanna spend some time explaining this verse.
I think my explanation of the verses before
will help you understand this,
but there's godly sorrow and there's worldly sorrow.
One thing to understand is this is written to a church,
not an individual, the church of Corinth.
Now, the church of Corinth
was a church that was like-minded.
I don't believe that if Paul was living today,
he'd write a letter to that church over there.
You say, why?
They're not even saved.
They don't even have the spirit of God.
I think he'd write a church to a fundamental Baptist,
soul-winning, fire-breathing church
that's preaching the word of God
and memorizing the Bible and reading the Bible.
He's not rebuking a church that is like,
I mean, he's not rebuking Eli Soriano, right?
What would be the purpose?
No, he's rebuking a church of people that are saved, okay?
And so you have to understand,
this is not written to unsaved people.
It's written to a church full of saved people.
So I do believe you could apply this as an individual,
but it's really to a church,
but it would still apply to that as well.
So there's godly sorrow and worldly sorrow.
Godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation,
not to be repented of.
Not to be repented of means there's no change.
See, godly sorrow makes a permanent change
where you don't go back on it.
What it's saying is godly sorrow results in a change
where you don't repent of that decision.
Do you understand the difference?
You make a change that's permanent, King David.
King David versus King Saul is the ultimate example
of godly sorrow versus worldly sorrow.
King Saul, oh, I'm sorry I tried to kill King David.
Couple days later, oh, man, I tried to kill him again.
A few days later, oh, man,
why do I keep trying to kill David?
Because you have worldly sorrow.
Actually, the ultimate example is the altar call.
That's worldly sorrow, right?
You come down here, you say, oh, man.
Well, you don't come down here.
Do not come down here, okay?
But you come down to that old-fashioned altar
and you get right with God.
Man, I can't believe I didn't read the Bible this past week.
What in the world?
Then all of a sudden you don't read the Bible the next week
and you come on down to that good old-fashioned altar
and you get right with God again,
but you don't make any changes.
That's worldly sorrow.
That's what the altar call is.
That's why the same people
that go down the altar call one week go down the next week
because of the fact that this is worldly sorrow.
It makes you feel like you're making changes,
but you haven't actually done anything.
Because godly sorrow indicates there's actually proof,
like a time period of a change,
worldly sorrow is just kind of temporary, okay?
And so it says,
Godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation.
You say, why does it say worketh repentance to salvation
if this is, I mean, it sounds like it's talking
about repenting of your sins in order to be saved, okay?
Well, here's the thing.
The word salvation is not always referring
to going to heaven or hell.
I mean, there's a lot of times the word saved
is in the Bible and it has nothing to do
with spiritual salvation.
Now, pre-tribbers have a real hard time
with he that endureth unto the end, the same shall be saved.
The context is physical death,
and if you believe in a post-trib rapture,
endure through the tribulation and you're gonna be saved
because God is gonna take you up to heaven.
I mean, if saved is always referring to spiritual salvation,
Paul said, except ye abide in this ship,
ye shall not be saved.
So I believe you gotta live inside of a ship to be saved.
Prove me wrong.
I got a verse, right?
Abide in the ship or you're not gonna be saved.
Look, saved is not always referring to spiritual salvation.
I'd be interested actually to study it out if it's usually.
I don't even know if it's usually.
I don't think it is.
I think usually it's actually referring
to physical salvation or something similar.
But here, godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation.
What is it saying?
Well, it's saying when you have godly sorrow
to the message you've heard,
it is going to save you from destroying your life.
It's gonna save you from God's judgment.
Here's an example.
Somebody who drinks alcohol, someone who's a drunk,
they are gonna live a very difficult life
when they hit their 40s and their 50s,
when their kidneys and their liver
and everything shuts down in their body, right?
They're gonna spend a lot of money on medical care,
but you know something that could save them
from that destruction?
Actually making a change.
Hearing a sermon preached and making a change
and it's gonna save them.
But that doesn't affect whether they go to heaven or hell
because there's drunks that we're gonna see in heaven, right?
And there's sober people that will be in hell
because going to heaven or hell is do you believe?
There are drunks that are on their way to heaven.
But if they want their lives to be saved,
they need to make changes when they hear the word of God.
And it will save them from destruction
coming in their lives.
And that's godly sorrow, not worldly sorrow.
See, if they have worldly sorrow, they hear the sermon,
man, I feel bad, I should not drink alcohol,
but they keep drinking.
Well, the sorrow of the world worketh death.
And literally it could, it will end
in an early death for that person.
But they would actually be saved from that destruction
if they made a change that was permanent.
So look, this verse has nothing to do
with repenting of your sins to be saved.
There are already saved people
and the salvation's not referring to going to heaven or hell.
There's nothing that would say it's heaven or hell.
It's just talking about saving you from destroying your life.
And literally that church,
if you want to apply it to the church,
which is probably the best application,
that candlestick's being removed
unless they adhere to what Paul said in 1 Corinthians.
So that church was saved, was spared,
would be a good word, they were spared
because of the fact they applied what Paul said.
But the sorrow of the world worketh death.
Then it says here in verse number,
man, I can't see, I got water on my notes.
Let me just pull out the Bible, okay?
And it says here in verse 11,
for behold, notice this verse 11,
for behold this self-same thing
that ye sorrowed after a godly sort.
So he says in verse 11, you had a godly sorrow,
real sorrow, which means a change takes place.
Then he says this, what carefulness it hath rotten you.
Probably careful not to commit sins, okay?
Yea, what clearing of yourselves.
So basically you cleared yourself from any wrongdoing.
Yea, what indignation.
Indignation is a strong anger,
almost being insulted at something that's wrong.
And they're probably angry at the sin
that had been committed.
Then it says this, yea, what fear?
Probably fear of God, vehement desire, zeal.
So what he's saying is, you know what?
The godly sorrow took place
and there's all these changes that took place.
Here's the thing.
We don't know when 1 Corinthians was written.
We don't know when 2 Corinthians was written.
But enough time went by where Paul says,
I can see a change.
You understand?
Godly sorrow results in a change, okay?
Worldly sorrow means there's no real change.
Godly sorrow is a change that takes place.
So if there's a side that did wrong, you know what?
We need godly sorrow.
We need people to say, hey, I did wrong
and make the changes, okay?
Now turn in your Bible back to Matthew 18.
Matthew 18.
Matthew chapter 18.
Look, if somebody says they're sorry,
I give them the benefit of the doubt.
I don't try to judge people's emotion.
You know, sometimes somebody says something on TV
and they say they're sorry for it
and then these people are saying,
do we think they were sincere or not?
But see, the Bible doesn't really make that distinction.
The Bible makes a distinction of,
was there a change or no afterwards?
It's not really something you can figure out
in five seconds based on someone, how their face is, right?
I mean, that's not necessarily
gonna be the best indicator, okay?
You see some people that take a picture
and then they look like they're really angry
but they're just not that good at smiling in pictures, right?
The face is not necessarily the best indication
of whether or not they're in a good mood or not.
I mean, a picture can be misleading.
I mean, whenever you see these things
like they have a husband murdered a wife
or the wife murdered the husband,
they're like, they look so happy in their pictures.
It's a picture, right?
That doesn't mean it's real.
It's just a picture.
They put on a smile, okay?
And so I want you to realize what we need is godly sorry.
You know what?
We'll give people the benefit of the doubt
if they say they're sorry but you know what?
There needs to be a change that takes place.
Matthew chapter 18, verse 15.
Moreover, if thy brother shall trespass against thee,
go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone.
If he shall hear thee, thou is gain thy brother.
So the goal is to gain your brother
or your sister that did wrong.
Tell him alone, one on one, and then deal with the problem.
Verse 16, but if he will not hear thee,
then take with thee one or two more
that in the mouth of two or three witnesses,
every word may be established.
So verse 16's really kind of giving us
if the party that did wrong does not say they're sorry.
Now in most situations, someone who did wrong
is gonna say they're sorry, okay?
And they're gonna get the benefit of the doubt
and you know what?
I would believe them.
Now in verse 16 though, what it's saying is
that if that person refuses to say they're sorry,
they will not admit they're wrong, right?
Now look, like over a year ago, I had a meeting
and the one side just would not admit
they did anything wrong.
And it's like, good night, how many things
do you want me to list?
And just like an excuse for every single thing.
And it's just like, it's obvious you did wrong.
It's like there's 10 witnesses.
I mean, it's just like, but they would not say
they were sorry.
And it's just like, what a fool you are.
And then they didn't make any change.
And they didn't say they were sorry.
And it's just like, well, that's the problem.
It's like, if you do wrong, just say you're sorry.
Just humble yourself.
And then you know what, make the change,
make it permanent, but just say you're sorry.
And look, if you're unwilling to say you're sorry,
then it's just like, that's the end result, right?
So verse 16 is if the side is not willing
to say they're sorry.
Now here's the thing, sometimes we might have meetings
and as I said, this does not fall under a perfect situation
of every situation is just like this.
It's not always gonna be like that.
Sometimes there's meetings to just make sure
we're on the same page and we have unity to go forward
so we can be reconciled and just kind of come to agreement.
Okay, now let me say this though.
In verse 16, it talks about bringing one or two more people.
Now, if you choose to try to reconcile
with someone one-on-one, that's fine.
But before you bring other people at our church into it,
you better let me know about what's going on.
I mean, you say, well, it doesn't mention the pastor.
What's given, okay, and I know I'm not the pastor, okay.
It doesn't mention the church leader,
but yeah, that's given that the church leader
has to be on board with the decision that's taking place.
Right, you're not making a final decision.
Are we kicking someone?
I mean, I show up to church today,
Brother Stuckey, we voted and we kicked
Brother Gilbert out of church.
I'm like, what, what did Gilbert do, right?
It's like, he's the one I was looking at
when I said that, right?
It's like, well, no, obviously you don't have the authority
to kick someone out of church or making a final decision.
You say, why, because the Bible defines the judge
as the person running the church.
That's the way God defines it.
It's not a democracy where we vote on everything.
If you voted on everything,
you would have a mess as a church.
People would disagree all the time.
We'd have a doctrine that comes up.
I mean, we're gonna take the communion, right?
You know, when we take it around Easter time,
oh, wait a minute, we voted.
Oh, we actually don't believe this anymore.
It's like, you'd have a mess.
You'd have the church of Corinth who messed up communion.
So basically, you know, you need godly sorrow,
but point number two is people need to abide
by decisions made at that meeting, okay?
Once the decision's made and once there's a meeting
to discuss it, all parties involved need to abide
and agree to that decision and just say,
I'm okay with the decision that was made, okay?
Now, I want you to realize,
it's not like it's the easiest thing
to try to determine the direct way to go
with every situation.
It's hard.
It's not easy.
I mean, if you're a parent and you have multiple children,
I'm sure you could raise your hand and say,
yeah, you know what, I've had times.
My kids were fighting and then all of a sudden,
I was in the other room.
I came, I tried my best to figure out what happened, right?
And you know what, sometimes you're wrong.
Sometimes the wrong child gets spanked.
Sometimes the wrong decision was made.
Sometimes the daughter instigated it with the son
or whatever and then you thought the son was at fault,
right, just like a sporting event, right?
A guy gets kicked out of a game for punching someone
and then on the replay, oh, now I see why I punched him,
right, but the ref didn't catch it, okay?
It's not like it's easy figuring out decisions,
but the way the Bible's saying is this.
He gives the authority to a local church
where basically they pray to God to help in the meeting,
help in the decision.
You determine whatever happened
and then you make a plan going forward
and then everybody needs to abide by that decision.
It's not always gonna be perfect.
It's not easy.
It's not two plus three equals five, okay?
Verse 16, but if you will not hear thee,
then take with thee one or two more,
that in the mouth of two or three witnesses,
every word may be established.
That's in a situation where one side is not willing
to say they're wrong and it kinda escalates to another level
where it's like, hey, we've got lots of people here
and we all agree you did wrong
and you're not willing to say you're sorry.
It's kinda like giving them another chance
to just admit they're wrong and get forgiveness, okay?
You know what, when you're reading this,
it also shows you that God is really long-suffering
toward people getting kicked out of church.
I mean, you should not have the attitude,
well, if somebody does something wrong,
immediately let's get rid of them
because we all do wrong, okay?
It says here in verse 17,
and if he shall not, and if he shall neglect to hear them,
tell it on to the church.
So here's a situation where the offending party
refuses to admit they're wrong.
More witnesses come.
You're still trying to keep it as low-key as possible.
They still refuse to say they're sorry,
and then all of a sudden, I have to come up here to church
and say so-and-so did this, will not say they're sorry,
and it's kinda like a last chance,
and at that point, they're not gonna say they're sorry.
At that point, whenever I hear stories like this
of pastors, they always send the text message,
hey, it's better for you not to come to church
because if you're coming to church,
this is gonna be dealt with
because this person refuses to say they're sorry, right?
And then you tell it on to the church,
and what does it say?
If he neglect to hear the church,
let him be on to thee as an heathen man and a publican.
Now, if somebody gets kicked out of church,
which is what this is talking about,
that does not mean they're unsaved,
but we should treat them as if they are unsaved, right?
They're like a heathen man or a publican.
They're like an unbeliever, the Bible says.
You know, they refuse to get right.
What does that mean?
It means you don't hang out with them.
Be not unequally yoked together with unbelievers.
What is the Bible saying?
It's saying don't go to lunch with someone
that got kicked out of our church.
And let me just be honest.
If they send you a happy Christmas,
you shouldn't respond to that either.
What's your goal?
It's like you had plenty of chances
to say you were sorry many times.
What's your goal at this point
rather than trying to destroy the unity
of a church that's doing something?
I don't need to keep getting emails
every three months either.
It's like you had plenty of chances.
I said it many times.
You knew what the repercussions were.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Yeah, you had worldly sorrow.
You weren't really sorry.
Otherwise, you would have dealt with that
a long time ago, okay?
The Bible says we should treat that person
as a heathen man and a publican, an unbeliever.
You say why?
Because they were a virus destroying our church.
So the Bible says, look, it's not fun
to kick people out of church.
It's not like this is fun.
I mean, if you're anything like Paul the Apostle,
and I'm not saying I'm Paul the Apostle,
but you know what?
It means that you don't enjoy
dealing with situations like this.
But if something like this happens,
as church members, you should be like,
man, I'm thankful that our church leader
protected our church from this situation.
Now, look, here's the reality.
If something like this happens,
you probably don't know all the details.
Wouldn't it be kind of foolish
to determine the result of something
if you don't really know what happened?
You know a little bit here and there,
it's like, oh, I don't think, brother,
you should have done that.
It's like, do you even know what took place?
It's like, I don't think Pastor Jimenez
should have done this.
It's like, you don't even know what took place.
And it's just like, if you knew,
and it's not like I wanna just broadcast
everything in situations.
So you just gotta decide, do I believe in a church?
Do I trust the person leading?
Do I think he's a good man of God
who's preaching the word of God?
And then just support the church in situations.
Then in verse 18, it says this,
verily I say unto you, okay?
Now, you in the Bible is plural.
And then he says this, whatsoever ye, ye is plural.
Now, here's the thing.
It is one person who runs a church ultimately
that makes the final decision.
Which of course, I'm underneath the authority
of Pastor Jimenez.
However, I am part of the church body.
It's not like you're the church body
and I'm outside the church body.
You go soul winning as the church body,
I'm outside the church body.
You read the Bible as the church body,
I don't have to read the Bible, right?
You're not allowed to commit adultery,
but I'm outside the church body, I'm allowed to commit.
I mean, what in the world?
No, I'm part of the church body.
I'm part of the church body.
So when we're saying ye, what that's indicating is,
hey, you know what?
Even though you didn't make the final decision,
you say, you know what?
I'm on board with the body of Christ,
this local body that made this decision, okay?
Whatsoever ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven.
You say, what does that mean?
Well, think of a legally binding contract, right?
You get married, it's legally binding, right?
A legally binding contract
where basically you agree to something.
And what the Bible's saying is the church
should be in agreement on whatever situations take place,
whatever it is.
Whatever it takes place in five years from now,
you should just say, I am on board with the church
and it's binding on earth.
And here's the thing, God says,
I honor the decision that was made on earth.
Now, am I perfect?
No.
If Jesus Christ was here, you know what?
He would probably deal with some situations
a little bit differently than me,
but at the same time, God says,
I still honor that decision that was made, okay?
Even if it's not perfect,
because this is not easy to do.
I mean, look, if people get in arguments or disputes,
it's not easy to figure out
what's the perfect decision to make,
who did what, who did this.
You hear the truth, sometimes it's in the middle.
It's hard to make a decision.
So the thing is, just get on board
with whatever the church decides in something.
It's like a legally binding contract before God
where God says, you know what?
I accept that decision.
It was bound on earth, it's bound in heaven.
And then it says this,
and whatsoever ye shall loose on earth
shall be loosed in heaven.
So what does that mean?
Well, here's the thing.
If we decide to give somebody a second chance,
they get a second chance.
If we decide to forgive someone, they get forgiven.
If we kick somebody out of church
and we decide to let them come back,
then you get on board with that, okay?
Now, we haven't had that problem yet, okay?
But I'm just saying, if that ever happened,
just get on board with the church.
That's the decision the church made, okay?
Because if it's loosed on earth,
it's gonna be loosed in heaven.
If it's bound on earth, it's bound in heaven.
God's just saying, you know what?
I decided my system was local churches run by one person
and I will honor the decision.
Now look, of course, if somebody was a wicked ruler
that's not even praying and they're just doing it
for covetous purposes, that's different.
But I'm saying if somebody is trying to do what's right
and they pray, I believe God will guide those meetings
and you know what?
That decision will be binding.
That's what the Bible says, okay?
Now, I do want you to realize something
because let's say it's something,
because some churches have this attitude
that everything stays in house no matter what.
It's like if somebody murdered your brother,
well, I mean, it's a church issue, you know?
We're supposed to forgive one another,
so we gotta forgive them.
It's like, no, if somebody murdered your brother,
go to the cops.
We'll go to the cops to report it.
If some illegal crime took place, right,
then that's gonna go before the cops.
If somebody got raped or forced, as the Bible says,
you know what, that would go before the cops.
I'm not saying every single thing gets kept in house,
but I'm just saying things that are not criminal
that the government has to deal with,
they should be kept in house, okay?
That's what the Bible teaches.
Verse 23, it says this.
Therefore is the kingdom of heaven
likened unto a certain king
which would take account of his servants,
and when he had begun to reckon,
one was brought unto him which owed him 10,000 talents.
But for as much as he had not to pay,
his Lord commanded him to be sold
and his wife and children,
and all that he had in payment to be made.
And so basically this guy is in servitude.
He can't make his payment,
and he's gonna lose his wife and his children
because he can't make the payment, okay?
The servant therefore fell down and worshiped him,
saying, Lord, have patience with me and I will pay thee all.
Then the Lord of that servant was moved with compassion
and loosed him and forgave him the debt.
And see, the Bible says the servant begs the Lord for mercy.
Please, because he doesn't wanna lose his wife,
doesn't wanna lose his child.
He's saying, give me time
and I'm gonna pay you all that I owe you.
He begs for mercy, okay?
Verse 28, but the same servant went out
and found one of his fellow servants
which owed him 100 pence,
and he laid hands on him and took him by the throat,
saying, pay me that thou owest.
So he begs for mercy before his Lord of the servant,
right, his Lord, his owner or boss or whatever.
Then he goes to someone who owes him money,
and Brother Franklin, no, I'm just kidding,
and he takes him by the neck, right?
And then he just chokes him.
He's like, pay me what you owe, right?
It's like, boy, your boss just gave you forgiveness
and you're taking him by the throat.
And let me tell you something,
the throat is one area that if somebody touches you,
you're ready to pound them, right?
They grab him by the throat,
because it doesn't take long to be choked out, right?
They're choking you.
It's like, man, it's like, we're going to war then, right?
And then it says this in verse 29,
and his fellow servant fell down at his feet
and besought him, saying, have patience with me
and I will pay thee all.
He does the same thing, and he would not,
but went and cast him into prison
until he should pay the debt.
So instead of forgiving him like his boss did,
you know what, he just takes him by the throat and says,
if you can't pay now, I'm throwing you in jail, right?
You're in trouble because you have this debt
you're not paying.
Verse 31, so when his fellow servants saw what was done,
they were very sorry, and came and told unto the Lord
all that was done.
Then his Lord, after he had called him, said unto him,
O thou wicked servant, I forgave thee all that debt,
because thou desirest me.
Shouldest not thou also have had compassion
on thy fellow servant, even as I had pity on thee?
And his Lord was wroth and delivered him to the tormentors
till he should pay all that was due unto him.
Verse 35, how does this tie into
what was just being talked about?
Verse 35, so likewise shall my heavenly Father
do also unto you, if ye from your hearts
forgive not everyone his brother their trespasses.
Now look, I believe the reason he's telling this
is because it ties together with the church discipline
he was talking about earlier, and here's the thing,
you need the godly sorrow if one side did wrong,
and then we need forgiveness from the other side.
They need to be able to forgive someone from their heart,
okay, that's what the Bible teaches.
Now I want you to realize a couple things about this though.
As I talked about godly sorrow, what does that mean?
It means there's gotta be kind of a time period
to prove that.
You can't know if somebody has godly sorrow immediately.
It's not possible.
They could seem like they do.
You say they seem sincere, but you don't really know.
The proof of godly sorrow is a time period that goes by.
So if somebody does you wrong and they say you're sorry,
try to forgive that person and give them
the benefit of the doubt, but you know what,
realize they might need some time to actually forgive you.
Let's see if it's actually real, right?
Because they might say, well, they said they're sorry,
but you know what, we'll see after a couple months,
because you don't know immediately.
There needs to be time to actually prove
that it was sincere or not.
The other thing to realize is this,
that you might forgive someone.
It does not mean everything's the same
as before whatever happened happens.
Let me give you an example.
Let's say for example, I ask Brother Marlon,
I say, hey, can I borrow a book from you?
And I borrow it from him today.
And then I say, I'll give it back next week.
And then I lose it.
And then all of a sudden I say, hey, I'm sorry.
You know what, I believe Marlon would forgive me for that.
Unless it's a book that's worth like 500,000 pesos then.
I don't know why he would let me borrow it
if it was worth that much, but then let's say for example,
I come to him in a couple weeks later and say,
hey, do you mind if I borrow this other book?
Well, here's the thing.
He's probably not gonna let me borrow the other book
because I just lost another one.
I mean, I would forgive you if I loaned you something
and you lost it, but you know what,
I mean, as long as it's not my kids.
But if I loan you something, I loan you a book
and then you lose it and then it's just like,
you know, a week later though,
I'm probably not gonna loan you another book
because you just lost that book.
So look, when situations happen,
it doesn't mean everything's gonna be the exact same
as before.
It could be different.
Somebody could forgive you.
It doesn't mean that everything's gonna be the exact same.
And we need to realize that.
That if you've done wrong to someone,
you say you're sorry, hey, they might forgive you.
They might have no problem going solely with you.
It doesn't mean that it's exactly like it was before.
Things could be different, okay?
And so point number one, we need godly sorrow.
When a situation's done wrong,
we need one side to say they're sorry
and then also have a time period
of having that godly sorrow, okay,
to prove that godly sorrow.
Number two, we need people at the meeting
to abide by decisions that are made,
whether they're the offending party or the offended,
to just abide by the decision
and just kind of agree to move on.
Now look, we need to realize though
that if we do wrong to someone and say we're sorry,
you know what, there's a healing time that's required.
It could take some time.
I mean, realistically, if we need a period
of godly sorrow, it might take someone several months
to actually fully forgive somebody.
And we oughta give them that time.
I sometimes recommend to people
that if you have problems with someone at church,
it's best to try to avoid people at church.
I've told people at our church before.
I say, you know what, why don't you just try to avoid them
for the next couple weeks?
Because my hope is that whatever the situation is,
it will resolve itself with time
because most of the time, it does.
And look, if you have a real problem with someone at church,
you know what, it's probably best to try to avoid them.
They say, Brother Stuckey,
I don't wanna have any problems.
None of us wanna have problems,
but look, the reality is I've been at church
with people that I had a problem with
or they had a problem with me.
And the best thing was just to avoid that person.
I mean, there was someone at my old church in West Virginia
and this guy, he hated me.
And he hated other people at church.
And he hated us because of our beliefs.
Literally, that's why he hated us.
And it's like, everyone thought his son was a homo
and it's like, well, it's not my fault
your son's a homo, right?
He's obviously mad at what we believe,
but it's just like, everyone's like,
whenever they visit the church, they're like,
is that guy a homo?
And it's like, I don't wanna say anything,
but he doesn't claim to be, okay?
But it's just like, I've used this example before.
He's the guy, when I went soul-winning with him one time,
he turned it over to me during the conversation.
He's like, well, my soul-winning partner
has a different opinion of homos.
Brother Matt, why don't you tell him
what you think about homos?
Look, I tried to get along with that guy.
What was really frustrating was
we rode in the same car there for soul-winning.
So on the way home, it's a 15-minute drive.
That felt like a drive from Pampanga to Manila, though.
I mean, I tried to change the subject.
And I literally was talking about the weather.
I was like, yeah, it was kinda hot today, wasn't it?
Anyway, so why do you think homos can't be saved?
I'm like, he kept bringing it up to the same thing.
I kept trying to avoid over and over and over again.
I was so thankful when we actually got there, right?
That 10-minute ride or 15, it felt like hours.
It's like, man, you're the one who started
an argument out soul-winning.
I'm trying to avoid it.
I'm gonna take a nap, right?
Sometimes it's best, though,
if you don't get along with people.
That person was, as far as I know,
he's still at the church, you know?
As far as I know, he's a believer in Christ.
He liked Curtis Hudson.
He liked what Curtis Hudson said about the gospel.
As far as I know, I'm gonna see that person in heaven.
He might be my personal enemy, or I'm his
because he doesn't like my beliefs.
But you know what?
Sometimes there's gonna be people at church
that maybe you have problems with.
Anyway, that church was smaller than our church,
except when you had the kids' ministry,
which was there from time to time, okay?
I'm just saying sometimes just avoid people at church.
That will help the healing process sometimes,
just not having much contact.
So point number one, godly sorrow.
Point two, both sides abiding by decisions.
Point three ties into what I just said, patience,
having patience for that healing process, okay?
Matthew 18, verse 19, again I say unto you
that if two of you shall agree on earth as touching
anything that they shall ask, it shall be done
for them of my Father which is in heaven.
For where two or three are gathered in my name,
there am I in the midst of them.
Verse 21, then Peter came to him and said,
Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me
and I forgive him till seven times?
I mean, Peter seems to have this attitude.
Man, I got what you're saying, Jesus.
We should be forgiving up to seven times?
Is that how many?
Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee until seven times,
but until 70 times seven, or 490 times.
Now look, I don't think the point Jesus was making
was you start counting, one, two, three, 488, 489, 490.
I'm sorry, I can't forgive you.
This is 491.
I don't think that's the point of what Jesus is saying.
I think he's saying we should be willing to forgive people.
Now once again, let's be logical with this.
If I lose a book that Marlin gives me,
he's probably not gonna let me borrow a book 490 times
and I lose it every single time, right?
But he could still forgive me if I did wrong to him
and I say I'm sorry, okay?
And once somebody says they're sorry,
you know what, the other side should forgive.
But there is a healing process that takes place.
It's not gonna be immediate.
Now the indication from Peter is the fact that,
yeah, you know what, people sin against me,
I wanna be forgiven, I wanna be forgiving to people,
but you know what, there's gonna be a time period.
There is a natural healing process that takes place, okay?
When people get in arguments,
they might agree to, okay, I forgive you.
There's still time that needs to take place
where people are still thinking about it.
It's not 100% necessarily done.
So point number one is godly sorrow.
Point two, abiding by decisions.
Point three, patience.
And point four is understanding.
And when I say understanding,
understanding that we are all sinners, okay?
Matthew 18, verse 15.
Moreover, if thy brother shall trespass against thee,
go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone.
The indication is your brother might trespass against you.
Your sister might trespass against you.
I mean, your brother or sister in Christ,
they might do wrong to you.
They might do something wrong.
And you know what, the Bible says it's definitely possible.
But the understanding is that we're all sinners, okay?
Now you say, Brother Stuckey,
it's really hard to forgive people.
Yeah, but here's the thing.
The Bible says that God will show himself merciful
with those that are merciful.
So here's the thing.
If you're merciful toward other people,
God will be merciful to you when you need mercy.
Verse 21, then Peter came to him and said,
Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me?
Once again, it is possible
that your brother sins against you, okay?
Now go to Ephesians chapter four.
Ephesians four, Ephesians four.
Now the other thing you need to realize is this.
When we do soul winning, you know what?
We pair people up for soul winning,
Brother Chris and Brother Matthias.
And when I was in Sacramento,
I oftentimes was the person
who did the pairing for soul winning.
And you know what, the reality was that
sometimes I knew about issues at church that were going on
because I worked for Verity.
Brother Chris and Brother Matthias,
they're probably not gonna know about issues
that people have.
Here's what I'm saying.
If you get paired up with your mortal enemy at church,
you're gonna have to deal with it, right?
I mean, it's like, I've been paired up with people
that, you know what, we just,
I mean, it's bad I got paired up with a guy
whose son was a homo.
I was paired up multiple times with the homo.
And I'm the one who gave him a ride to soul winning
because he was too young.
It's like, you know, I talked to the assistant pastor
and I just said, I don't feel comfortable.
You need to pair me in a group of three from now on, right?
But it's just like, you know what,
if I can go soul winning with someone
that I know is a homo, then,
and by the way, everyone knows he's a homo now.
It's been several years.
It's come out, okay?
It was obvious.
But let me just say this.
If I can go soul winning with someone who's a homo,
it's like, you can go soul winning
with your brother or sister in Christ
that maybe you don't get along with the best
without getting into an argument, okay?
Because what's the goal of soul winning?
Well, the goal of soul winning is to win souls to Christ.
If you get paired with someone
that maybe you don't get along with the best,
it just is what it is.
You don't have to be best friends with everybody at church,
but you do have to be able to be cordial to them.
Now, you can avoid them and not talk to them,
but you don't wanna be rude to anyone at church.
You have to be able to just at least somewhat get along
with people at church,
even if they're not the person you're gonna talk to,
even if they're not your favorite person.
There are gonna be people,
especially if our church was 200 people,
probably all of us would have people we'd avoid, right?
Probably all of us would have certain people
that are like, I don't really trust that person or whatever,
and it just is what it is, okay?
So if there's someone that you don't get along with the best,
the best thing to do is just try to avoid that person, okay?
So when it comes to somebody sinning against you
or somebody doing wrong or having this sort of situation,
there's kind of two groups of people,
those that are involved and those that are not involved,
okay?
If you're involved in this situation,
how should you deal with it?
Ephesians 4 verse 32, Ephesians 4 verse 32,
and this is the church of Ephesus,
this is a church epistle here.
Ephesians 4 verse 32,
and be kind one to another, tenderhearted,
forgiving one another,
even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.
The Bible says as God forgave us,
we should be willing to forgive other people.
Now here's the thing,
God forgave us when we did not deserve forgiveness,
and we ought to be willing to forgive people
even if they don't deserve it
or even if we don't think they deserve it.
Now once again,
that doesn't mean that they're your best friend afterwards.
That doesn't even mean you have to fully trust them.
That doesn't mean things are the exact same
as they were before,
but you can still just say, you know what,
hey, I forgive them,
and it's okay that they're my fellow church member
even if they're not my best friend, okay?
Now I'm gonna give you a couple of examples
of this in the Bible.
Go to Matthew 27, Matthew 27.
Matthew 27.
Now look, I'm not saying this is easy to do.
I mean, I've had people that did me wrong in church before,
and it is really hard to wanna forgive them.
It's just like, especially when they weren't sorry.
I remember a situation where the side wasn't sorry,
and I was just like, I cannot believe,
but I didn't make the ultimate decision at that church.
I wasn't the pastor,
and I was like, I cannot believe
they're not even saying their,
I mean, it made me mad.
I didn't say that publicly,
but it was just like,
but I had to be willing to forgive them
because that was the decision that was made.
And I didn't agree with that decision personally,
but I also understood this is a good church,
and that's binding in heaven by God's standards.
So I have to abide by that decision,
even though in my opinion, that person,
I would have loved to see just get the boot, right?
So let's see a couple of examples.
Here's an example with Jesus Christ
of him being willing to forgive someone, okay?
Matthew 27, verse 39.
And they that passed by and reviled
and wagging their heads and saying,
Thou that destroyest the temple
and buildest it in three days, save thyself.
If thou be the Son of God, come down from the cross.
So they're mocking Jesus in Matthew 27, verse 40.
If you're the Son of God, come down from the cross.
And they don't get it.
Jesus intentionally is allowing himself to die.
I mean, he could come down from the cross,
but that's not his goal.
They think, oh, it shows you're weak.
You're not powerful.
You're dying on the cross.
Then it says in verse 41,
likewise also the chief priests mocking him
but the scribes and elders said,
he saved others, himself he cannot save.
If he be the King of Israel,
let him come down from the cross and we will believe him.
And so once again, they're mocking him
because here's the thing,
they consider Jesus to be a false prophet, right?
I mean, another religion,
they don't believe Jesus is the Son of God,
so they don't like Jesus Christ.
And they're mocking him when he's being crucified.
It says this in verse 43,
he trusted in God, let him deliver him now
if he will have him,
and the chief priest said, I am the Son of God.
The thieves also which were crucified with him
cast the same in his teeth, okay?
So the thieves that are beside him,
they're doing the exact same thing of mocking him.
Now, before verse 44,
what you're seeing is, you know, they're mocking Jesus.
And verse 44, when it says cast the same in his teeth,
what they're saying is they're also mocking
through their mouth the things that they're saying.
They're doing the same thing the thieves are, okay?
The reason why I'm showing you that is later on,
I'm gonna show you a verse
where it talks about gnashing on him with their teeth.
It's not saying that they were biting him
when they're gnashing on him.
It's saying they're casting the same in his teeth.
They're mocking him, okay, which is gonna refer to Stephen.
But go to Luke 23, Luke 23, Luke 23.
So we see that Jesus Christ, you know what?
He was crucified with two other people, right?
We've all seen the picture of the three crosses
and Jesus was crucified,
and two other people were also mocking him
that were killed as well.
Luke 23, verse 34.
And I don't have time to read this whole chapter.
You know, I'm just kind of getting you
into the main thing of Jesus forgiving.
Notice what it says in verse 34, Luke 23, verse 34.
Then said Jesus, Father, forgive them,
for they know not what they do.
Father, forgive, I mean, this is a very famous phrase
in the Bible, right?
Forgive them, for they know not what they do.
It's like, man, they're killing you.
They're mocking you, and you're being crucified.
The crown of thorns, and you're forgiving them?
Because I'll be honest, if I was up there on the cross
for just being crucified for being a Christian
or a soul winner, I don't know that I'd be able
to forgive someone like that.
I mean, he's forgiving them, they're mocking him.
I'd be thinking in my head,
you're gonna get what's coming to you, buddy, right?
But Jesus forgives them, and he says, Father, forgive them,
for they know not what they do.
When I read that, I really kind of think of it like this.
I believe many people that were mocking Jesus
were not reprobates.
Probably most of them weren't.
Because if they were reprobates,
I don't believe Jesus was saying forgive them.
He's saying forgive them, for they know not what they do.
I kind of look at that as, hey, you know what?
Don't allow this to turn them, like this is their moment,
they made a choice, they're a reprobate.
Give them another chance, sort of attitude, right?
It's like, Father, forgive them,
for they know not what they do.
Look at verse 39, verse 39.
And one of the malefactors which were hanged railed on him,
saying, if thou be Christ, save thyself and us.
But the other answering rebuked him, saying,
dost not thou fear God,
seeing thou art in the same condemnation?
And we indeed justly, we deserve this, is what he's saying,
for we receive the due reward of our deeds,
but this man hath done nothing amiss.
And he said unto Jesus, Lord, remember me
when thou comest into thy kingdom.
And Jesus said unto him, verily I say unto thee,
today shalt thou be with me in paradise.
This person who was mocking Jesus
just maybe an hour before this,
we don't know the exact time, just a few hours before this,
this man who was beside Jesus Christ was mocking Jesus.
And then all of a sudden he sees Jesus forgiving people
that do not deserve to be forgiven.
And you kind of imagine what's going through his mind.
He was mocking Jesus and now he might be thinking,
man, I've never met anyone who would be willing to forgive.
Maybe this is actually the son of God.
He had obviously heard the gospel.
Jesus, I'm sure, had preached the gospel
and he's heard and people were talking about him
and he realizes up on the cross,
this actually is the son of God.
But I wonder if Jesus had never forgiven that person
in verse 34.
I wonder if this thief on the cross,
we would never actually meet one day.
I wonder if he would have died and gone to hell
because of the fact Jesus was not willing to forgive.
Go to Acts 7.
If we are able to forgive when people do us wrong,
it will have a major, major impact on other people.
I mean, this is great advice for marriage as well.
If your husband does something wrong
and you're able to forgive, you know what?
They're gonna be more forgiving if you do wrong.
Right?
And it's just like God's gonna be more forgiving
with us as well.
I like how Pastor Mendez says it.
He says, whenever these things happen in life,
he looks at them as an opportunity.
It's like, all right, I'm gonna get a lot of mercy
from God now because I'm gonna be willing to forgive.
But you're really building up mercy from God
if or when you do something wrong in the future.
So if you forgive people that don't deserve it,
God's gonna be very merciful to you.
Why?
You are very merciful.
If you're not very merciful,
then God's not gonna be very merciful to you, though.
You say, well, that was Jesus Christ.
I mean, he was God in the flesh.
He was perfect.
I could never do that.
I'm a human being.
But let's look at the story of Stephen.
Acts 7, verse 54.
When they heard these things,
when they heard these things,
Acts 7, verse 54, when they heard these things,
they were cut to the heart
and they gnashed on him with their teeth.
So once again, gnashing on him with their teeth,
that's mocking.
It's not biting.
You've been watching The Walking Dead too much, okay?
You've been watching zombie movies too much.
And I understand there is an example
of zombies in the Bible, which is actually true.
They rose from the graves, okay?
But not like The Walking Dead type zombie, okay?
And so when they heard these things,
they were cut to the heart and they gnashed on him.
They got so angry at what Stephen was saying
that they were just like ripping him apart,
like yelling at him, being mad and everything.
Verse 55, but he being full of the Holy Ghost
looked up steadfastly into heaven
and saw the glory of God
and Jesus standing on the right hand of God
and said, behold, I see the heavens open
and the Son of Man standing on the right hand of God.
And they cried out with a loud voice
and stopped their ears and ran upon him with one accord.
So they're so angry and they stopped their ears,
meaning I'm not listening to anything he's saying.
Whether they actually did this
or whether or not they just refused to listen,
they refused to hear anything Stephen said.
And they're running, they wanna kill him.
They do kill him.
They're so angry at what he's saying, okay?
Now go to verse 59, we'll look at verse 58 in a second.
And they stoned Stephen calling upon God and saying,
Lord Jesus received my spirit.
So Stephen says, Lord Jesus received my spirit.
Then in verse 60, and he kneeled down
and cried with a loud voice,
Lord, lay not this sin to their charge.
And when he had said this, he fell asleep,
which is a way to say he died.
But the last thing he says is,
Lord, lay not this sin to their charge.
God forgive these people.
That also indicates there's people that are not reprobates
that are stoning a man of God.
They're so mad at what he's saying.
And he says, lay not this sin to their charge.
What is he saying?
He's saying, God, give him another chance.
I mean, they're killing him.
I don't think I would have done that.
I mean, I don't think, I mean,
hopefully one day I am as righteous or as godly as Stephen,
but honestly, I don't think I would have done that
in that situation.
And if you would, man, praise the Lord, that'd be great.
But honestly, probably none of us in this room
would have actually had that reaction
when they're stoning you to death.
But his last words, lay not this sin to their charge.
You say, what's your point?
I mean, how does that benefit or what?
Well, notice what it says in verse 58.
And cast him out of the city and stoned him.
And the witnesses laid down their clothes
at a young man's feet, whose name was Saul.
Now, who is Saul referring to?
Paul the apostle.
Why is it that the Bible makes mention
of Paul the apostle being there?
It's showing the impact that Stephen had on Saul's life.
Now, I wonder if Stephen actually gets
some kind of rewards in heaven for the work
that Paul the apostle did.
Like, I think logically he probably would
because I believe this is a major point
of what got Paul saved or Saul at the time.
Would he have gotten saved without this?
I don't know.
But when you see something like this,
you've got to have the reaction
nobody would be willing to forgive.
Like, what in the world?
And Stephen forgives.
You say, why?
Because of the fact he had that much love within his heart.
Go to Proverbs 17.
Proverbs 17.
And he forgives someone who,
people who aren't even saved, who don't deserve it at all.
The Bible says, with the merciful,
thou wilt show thyself merciful,
and with the upright man, thou wilt show thyself upright.
Last thing, last verse we're going to look at.
So that's parties involved.
So we need to have godly sorrow and the side forgives.
There's a healing process.
And look, things might never be the same.
And you know what?
That is okay.
It's okay if not everybody's always your best friend,
as long as you can just let bygones be bygones
and just kind of move on, okay?
Now, once again, we're not talking about criminal activity.
I mean, if somebody molests your baby,
then you better believe that's going before a courtroom.
And you better believe we're going to do everything
in our power to get that person murdered
and get the death penalty.
I don't know how often the death penalty is,
but that is certainly the number one thing
that deserves the death penalty,
is a young child being molested like that, okay?
But we're talking about things
that can be restored in church.
What about people that are not involved in the situation?
Because here's the thing.
As I said, Matthew 18's not a perfect template.
As much as it would be great
if one person just goes to another,
very rarely does this actually happen.
Usually other people find out about whatever takes place,
okay?
If you find out about a situation that does not involve you
but somebody brings you into the situation,
what does it say in Proverbs 17, verse nine?
He that covereth a transgression seeketh love,
but he that repeateth a matter separateth very friends.
What is the Bible saying?
Don't gossip about the situation.
And what you should also do is just tell that person,
hey, you settle it with that person.
And you know what?
I should be aware of situations like this.
Because what ends up taking place sometimes
is a situation will happen at a church
and the pastor or the church leader never finds out about it
because everybody assumes,
nobody wants to tell the church leader about it.
But they assume, I'm 98% sure somebody's told him.
And then oftentimes they never even know.
I mean, I know of a pastor in the US.
He started a church and he sent somebody out as a pastor
and the church disbanded shortly after that.
And nobody ever told him.
Like everybody at his church knew
that the church he had just started had just toppled
because the pastor quit, the new pastor quit.
He was never told.
And it's like somebody else actually told him,
another pastor said, hey,
I just want to make sure you already knew.
He's like, I had no idea.
It's like, man, that would be a nice thing to know.
Right?
It's like everybody always assumes
the leadership knows about situations.
Actually, that's not always the way it works.
Oftentimes they don't know about it.
And the reality is this, you know what?
Honestly, the only people that you can really trust
to be fully impartial in situations
are probably me and my wife.
Because we have no vested interest in it.
We want to get things restored and everything,
but I'm not going to take somebody's side
because they're my friend or whatever.
No, it's like, I'm going to try to do things
as impartially as I can.
But it's like people oftentimes bring their friends
into situations and it becomes like a battle.
Who has more people on their side?
That doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter how many people are on your side,
has nothing to do with it.
It's like the only person who should know about it
is me or my wife because otherwise it's like
the situation's probably just never going to be dealt with.
And then it's going to be boiling up inside people
and then they get mad.
It's like, no, sometimes situations
need to be brought up and dealt with.
But it doesn't mean that everybody in church
needs to know about everything.
It needs to become a big situation at church.
Things should be kept quiet.
Look, gossiping is always wrong.
And if you gossip about situations and bring it up,
you have to ask yourself, are you benefiting
the church body that you're a part of?
Does it benefit to just gossip and spread situations
that do not involve you?
Does that help the healing for the body?
Because look, if you're the nose,
the finger's still part of your body.
And if there's a problem in the finger
and then you have to get surgery,
it's going to affect the entire body.
The Bible speaks about that.
Don't gossip about situations that do not involve you.
This is what the Bible teaches.
It's better just to have the parties deal with it
and then I can be involved or my wife
and things can get settled.
Let's close in order of prayer.
Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for allowing us
to be here today and getting to see your word
on this topic and help us to be a church
that does everything we can to avoid church problems,
help all of us to try our best
not to offend our brothers in Christ,
not to sin against others, not to do wrong,
but help us also to be a church that is willing
to deal with problems if they do take place
so we can restore the unity at our church.
We pray this in Jesus' name, amen.