Now I remember when I was a lot younger and you know somebody said something to
me and it kind of you know I kind of I don't know I don't know if I want to say
it hurt my feelings or just it just kind of cut me to the heart because of the
fact that what they were saying I felt like it was kind of true what they were
saying you know and and usually when somebody says something to you and it's
not true it doesn't really bother you that much right I mean if somebody just
rails on you with some outlandish accusation you saw that's a good one you
know yeah right but you know when somebody criticizes you and it kind of
cuts to the heart because you you kind of feel like they hit a little too close
to home you know what I'm talking about I remember when I was a young man it
wasn't really a criticism of me but this just kind of cut me to the heart and I
was young and I didn't know a whole lot but I remember somebody said to me they
said to me I was talking to them about how you know if you do the right things
God's gonna bless you and God's gonna take care of you and this and that and
you know this person basically said to me they said you know what they said I
look at your life right now and they said you know I see you going to church
three times a week and this is a long time ago that's when I was first married
you know in the early day I think I've been married a few years actually you
know I've been married several years but it was a long time ago it was a few
years ago and they said you know I look at your life you're in church three
times a week you're out soul-winning you read the Bible like madness you know
and you're you're tithing you know you're giving to missions and they say
but look at your life they said you know God's not blessing you I mean look you're
you're dirt poor you have no money you know you're not getting ahead you're not
getting anywhere you know things aren't going great for you so how are you gonna
sit there and tell me that if I do the right thing God's gonna bless me you
know when I look at you you're not being blessed and at the time I mean I
was struggling really bad financially I mean we were very poor things were not
going good and it just kind of hurt me because I was just thinking to myself
you know why isn't God blessing me more you know what I mean I am doing the
right things you know but you know what God was blessing me because I was out
getting people saved because I was having children with my wife and you
know we look at it and say you're not being blessed because your car is a
piece of junk and and you don't have any money and you can hardly even pay your
bills and you know and I you know thank God ever since I've been married the
only time I've ever been laid out a bill was just because you know I just forgot
to send it out I mean I've always had the money for bills but sometimes that's
all the money I had and we there were times when we had no furniture I mean
for years we had no furniture no food what was the thing that was brought up
honey the other day that I always forget to mention when I'm talking about a poor
we were she brought up just the most extreme example and I was like man I
should have brought that up I mean just to get you to realize I mean we had
nothing and this person looked at that from the outside and saw that you know
that we were just struggling and just God's not blessing you but you know what
we got the blessing of God all mixed up and you know you got your prosperity
preachers out there the health and wealth gospel that's gonna tell you
about how God's gonna bless you financially you know God's not
necessarily gonna bless you financially but you know what God will bless you
with something that's more important I mean what is the value of getting
somebody saved I mean that's treasure in heaven I mean that's a human being I
mean is a human being worth more or things and we need to realize that
people are what's important and nothing and and this philosophy carries over to
every part of life and I remember at the time thinking to myself you know what
I don't know if I can afford to have children but you know I'm just gonna I'm
just gonna pray that God provides I'm just gonna have faith in God and you
know God did provide and yes we were lean yes we were scraping by but we
always had food to eat we were able to pay our bills and we lived we survived
we made and you know I remember I said to somebody at the time I said well I
said I can always make more money later and straighten my finances out there but
I can't go back and have a bunch of kids later you know what I mean and and I saw the
value in a human being you know I can look at my children's faces right now
and be glad that I chose people rather than things